Personal Development

Quarter 1

Self -Development :Knowing Oneself

Johari’s Window

One great way of assessing the self and know how much the individual knows the self is by asking the people around them.
Through this may be awkward, particularly when asking someone straightforwardly. Know that even your friends can be great source
of information, whether it be positive or negative about the self. To avoid being awkward and extract the best possible self-
assessment without compromising the individual, psychologist Joseph Luft ( 1916- 2014 ) and Harrington Ingham ( 1916- 1995 )
devised a technique to help people better understand themselves as well as their relationship with others.

The Self, in contemporary literature and even common sense, is commonly defined by the following characteristics:
“separate, self-contained, independent, inconsistent, unitary, and private” ( Stevens, 1996 ). When we talk about the self, being
“separate” it means it is distinct, different and unique from others. It has own uniqueness that defines him/ her from others. It has an
identity of its own, even twins, may it be fraternal, is very much distinct from the other. When we are talking about “self-contained”,
we describe its existence as having its own independence. It may exist with or without others; it is self-containing of its own thoughts,
characteristics and volition. For example, we make our profile pictures in social media, carefully choosing a picture that expresses
more of our thoughts, that tell us of what we are, that tells us what we are in real life. Although in these given times, it is easy to create
another “self” or deceive someone make-up “self”.

Nevertheless, although it is relatively easy to make another “self” in this age of social media and advance technology, the
“self” is very much consistent and persisting. Every “self” has its own personality that is enduring, that last during late adolescence. Its
uniqueness and its consistency allow it to be studied, described and even measured ( also means that a particular self’s trait
characteristics, tendencies and potentialities) are very evident and distinguishable from other “selves”. The Self is unitary in that it is
the center of all experiences and thoughts that run a particular person. It is the topmost executive in an all individual where all
processes, emotions, and thoughts converged. Lastly, the self is private. A person may sort out information, feelings and emotions, and
thought processes within the self. The whole is a process is never accessible to anyone but the self. This suggest that the self is isolated
from the external world. It lives within its own world.

Having in its own world means, you can create or nurture what can you can be ( ideal self ) or maintain/ improve your current
self ( actual self ). The ideal self pertains to the image or aspirations of what you want to become. This may be similar in hoping
characteristics that you do not possess as of the moment, but may one day be part of who you are, just like what Filipinos tend to
watch in various talent shows. This may be the ability to have a beautiful voice’ or have different achievements like the characteristics
of your idols or other international figures ( Michael Jordan, Sarah Geronimo etc. ) . While the actual self as the term implies
“actual”, is your present self that you see on the daily basis. It is the self that is constantly keeping in touch in your everyday
experiences. It has the potential to improve or develop as deemed by every individual. This may also pertain to the gifts that you
possess that is innate in you when you were born.

Combining these two categories of the self, it established the distinction of the Self- Concept. This is a collection of beliefs
about one’s basic nature, unique qualities, and typical behavior. This is a collection of beliefs about one’s basic nature, unique
qualities, typical behavior. Although we may have so many dimensions in which we describe ourselves such as “ I’m grateful” or “I’m
friendly”, we have separate concepts of our physical, social, emotional and intellectual selves; yet we are still referring to one single
entity that is unique and very distinct from others ( Don Hamacheck, 1992) Our various self-concepts are characterized by relatively
distinct thoughts and feelings. That is, we may have considerable information about our social skills and feel quite confident with
regard to them but have limited information about our physical skills and feel less confident about this aspect of our self. When a
particular self- concept is operating its attendant thoughts and feelings will strongly influence the way we process self-relevant
information ( Fiske & Taylor, 1991).

There are several factors that shape self- concept. Among them are your own observations, feedback from others and cultural
values.

Your Own Observations

 In the process of self-introspection, that may help you re-evaluate your motivations and, in real-time, observing what you do
at this moment is one of the significant information about your interest or dislike. During early childhood, we start observing our
behavior and drawing conclusions about ourselves. We are aware of what we do, we dislike; can and cannot do. Although, when we
are still children , our observation are not entirely correct or sometimes subject to change and entirely up to us, to retain or to improve.
We even compare our observed selves from others. In social comparison theory, people need to compare themselves with others in
order to gain insight into their own behavior ( Festinger, 1954, Geothals & Darley, 1977; Wood,1989). The potential impact of such
social comparison was dramatically demonstrated in an interesting study ( Morse & Gergen, 1970).

Feedback from Others

Positive and negative criticisms also create an impact on self-concept. People talk about us or how they discriminate us give
an in shaping the self-concept . The amount of criticism, feedback we sometimes freely give, helps shape the current self- concept of
what we choose to be or not. As we grow old, the number of significant and non-significant people in our lives also grows. Everyone
contributes in reshaping the self-concept. Even our ability to accomplish something or destroy our selves comes from painful remarks
or constructive criticism of others. In child-rearing especially the parents, has a unique and essential role in reinforcing and shaping
the self- concept. As children, we receive direct feedback from them. Their constant approval and disapproval set guidelines for what
should be or not, shaping and inputting the values and characteristics of the children and, later, becoming what they are when they
grow. The saying “kung ano ang puno ay siyang bunga”, is a testament output family values instilled in childhood rearing practices.
Aside from children comparing their actions from others, they also compare themselves to their parents. That is why sometimes , even
when our parents are gone, we still have their characteristics and values ; we unconsciously accept this our self-concept, along with
their approvals and disapprovals. Most of us, especially when we are young, take this sort of feedback to heart. Thus, it is no surprise
that studies find an association between parents’ views of a child and the child’s self-concept ( Wylie, 1979). There is even more
substantial evidence for a relationship between children’s perception of their parents’ attitude toward them and their self- perception
(Wylie, 1979).

Cultural Values/ Cultural Guidelines

Self- concept is also indirectly by cultural values. In the study of Cultural Psychology, in this age of technology and social
media, we accept our differences, especially on how we accept the culture and beliefs of others. Japanese society does not tolerate
corruption; the Philippines has always been influenced or has always had the familial clinging of thinking and protectiveness. The
Chinese have always thought to have a strong business minded stand in their points of view. The society in which we are raised
defines what is “good” and “bad” in personality and behavior. In the Philippines, our cultural values were shaped by historical
colonization, which is evident in our present society, particularly our strong family ties. Another cultural hospitality that is deemed
acceptable as our nature. Even the dismal corruption that has been the perennial problem of the country also shaped the tolerance of
Filipinos as a way of answering societal problems.

Having Self-knowledge

Stems from the actual-self. It derives from our social interactions of society that provide insight into how others react to us. It
is the same as gaining feedback from others. The reaction of other people is an essential aspect of gaining actual-self or our self-
image. Even our social roles are adjusted, on how we view ourselves today, and how ideally ( ideal self) what we would like to be in
the future. There is a negotiation that exist between the two selves, which is complicated by numerous exchanges between the ideal
self and actual self. These exchanges are exemplified in these social roles, and they are adjusted continuously and re- adjusted.