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Dreams of New Eden by Dayle Sanders

"Dreams of New Eden" (Working title)


By Dayle Sanders
14/02/11
Dreams of New Eden by Dayle Sanders

Sorry, no treatment in-depth character bio (possible other holes too!)


Plot and story itself may convey sketchiness...

Main genres: Animation | Drama | Family


Sub-genres (Genres that create specific character and plot expectations):
Matchmaker | Triumph of the spirit

LEAD CHARACTER - Juggler (Chas)


FRIEND(S) - Assistant (Margarita)
OPPONENT - Xanthos (The big and bad vacuum cleaner)
________________________________________________________________

The Step Outline:


After a series of jobs which didn't work out, Chas is the new boy for the circus act. He
dreams of being part of the New Eden Vaudeville, which is currently being constructed.
Unsure if he'll meet his peak in the audition, Chas is very nervous about the recruitment
program and how he will fair. With his equipment ready, he meanders down 'Coimbra road'
arriving at the Vaudeville, a grand sight indeed. It is heaving; auditionees everywhere. In
readiness for the audition, Chas warms up and prepares his moves. Margarita, a
volunteering assistant of the construction team is operating the Xanthos (a rather large
looking vacuum cleaner machine). Margarita is distracted, and becomes absorbed by Chas'
juggling. Through expressions, she applauds and reassures him that she is more than
satisfied. Unexpectedly, in the heat of practice, Chas trips and causes commotion. The
juggling balls are hauled in mid-air and get swallowed up by the Xanthos. In shock,
Margarita starts to pant, angry with herself for getting distracted. Suddenly, loud noises
start ringing from the machine and with one great big explosion, objects come flying out of
it. With Margarita going nuts, Chas winces and attempts to catch the objects in a suitable
'vaudeville' way - thus impressing everyone, and making a new friend.

________________________________________________________________

Premise:
Juggling fanatic discovers whisper of the heart.

________________________________________________________________

logline:
New York, 1931. Everyday, young Chas dreams of being part of the theatre. An aspiring but
nervous juggler, now's his chance. With the construction of the "New Eden Vaudeville" well
underway time is running out. Chas leaves his normal life and seeks the road to stardom -
regardless of how he does it..., the results may surprise.

________________________________________________________________

3 Act Structure (rough (unfinished))


1. BEGINNING:
SETTING-UP THE PREDICAMENT.
New York, 1931. Corporate bankruptcies, massive unemployment and deflation. As a result
of the global economic crisis was a paradigm shift in theatrical movement.
First there was darkness, complete and absolute. An alarm goes off. Confused, a man sits
up from his bed and rubs at his eyes. Sunshine soon begins to stream through a high,
arched opening to his left. It was very bright that he raised his arm to shield his eyes from
the brilliance. Finally he hits the alarm. Becoming aware of a gnawing emptiness in his
stomach, he recognised - as if from recent events - the symptoms of hunger. He yawns and
begins to itch his back. Picking up and observing a small leaflet on his bedside table (of the
Dreams of New Eden by Dayle Sanders

New Eden vaudeville) his blood flares up within him. He smiles, then let's the energy flow
out. As he moves so quickly to get out of bed he collapses head first into the floor. Brushing
off the pain, he dons a new set of clothes. Immediately after, he begins exercising his body,
moving through a series of dance-like steps, leaping and twirling juggling balls. He practices
this sequence of movements as if performing to an audience. His face is concentrating so
much that he begins to make funny, twisted facial expressions. He looks at his clock,
struggling to contain his excitement. He begins to jump up and down multiple times.

2. MIDDLE:
CONFLICT ACTIONS and REACTIONS.
Chas leaves his attic and exits the building. The New Eden Vaudeville is nearby.
There are adverts everywhere/a massive banner nearby the theatre to emphasis
construction and esteem for it's grand opening. Auditions are taking place in readiness for
the opening.
Upon arrival, there and hundreds of theatrical auditionees. It is very crowded. Nervous, the
Chas scopes the environment and lays eyes upon the female Margarita, and a rather large
and peculiar machine. There is a lot of free room over here, it is an ideal spot to resume his
performance and rehearsal.

The young woman vaults some of the controls on the machine, before turning round and
sighing deeply. She is bored of how uneventful it is. The sky was bright and clear, and cool
breeze was blowing across the clearing. Holding onto the moment she begins to look around
and notices Chas. Intrigued, she starts walking towards him. Noticing that the woman was
approaching him, he becomes embarrassed and dense, trying not to look eye-to-eye with
her. Stumbling several times, he accidentally launches one of the balls into her direction.
Turning around slowly his face lights up red. She continues to languorously approach him,
until face to face. Looking in the direction of the fallen ball, she begins laughing, the sound
rich and musical. She begins to run after the ball and he follows. They are closer to the
machine now. Overwhelmed by her presence, he retrieves the ball, eyes her in thanks,
breathes in deeply, maintaining levels of suppleness, strength, and balance. Slowly, his
body smoothly flows and he launches the juggling balls into the air and begins to act in
front of her. Through the succession of executed moves, twists and turns, he impresses
well. Unfortunately, a change of events soon occurs.

3. END:
FINAL STRUGGLE, RESOLUTION & AFTERMATH.
Chas trips, landing heavily, and the juggling balls are gobbled up by the Xanthos. In an
attempt to ascertain the situation, the Xanthos quickly starts to make horrible loud noises.
Then the noises begins to escalate. The machine starts to move around like crazy and
causes a lot of attention. Margarita is gob smacked; she tries to sort the problem but her
efforts are fruitless. Both Chas and Margarita try to sort out the problem. The Xanthos
explodes, Chas winces, catches the Chas winces and attempts to catch the objects in a
suitable 'vaudeville' way - thus impressing everyone.

________________________________________________________________
Dreams of New Eden by Dayle Sanders

DEVELOPMENT
Draft scripts/Story development
Part 1

Kayleigh is my partner for Unit 4. I owe her one big time for sparking loads of ideas. Hopefully we'll
squeeze more brain juice out before next week. I apologise upfront for this gargantuan beast of a
post! What I like most about this collaboration, is knowing that there is a feeling of incremental
pacing. Ideas are at a constant!: they continue to expand and flurry, they grow richer with accuracy
and this is something to be aware of too. I am not finished yet with flowing my ideas through, because
I want to aim to bridge together several ideas before I start any concept. If I have, say, two or three
complete plots to work from, I'll give concept a blast! I'll feel more confident this way...
When me and Kayleigh arranged a meet up on MSN, it felt as though she was at no hardship with her
plot. Her ideas are really good and when she shared them to me, they were flowing with little effort.
With the exception of my 'Erm's, 'Ugh's, and 'WTF's in between mine and Kayleigh' "brain dribbles",
I'm not feeling as perplexed about my own arrangement of objects. I want to be able to stitch it
together before I start drafting concept work. More importantly, I can see that they will do. :-)

My Notes:
Juggler has been abandoned by the circus. Somehow that connects to the building site: A place of
desolation and quiet. The vacuum cleaner..., is actually an animalistic, living, breathing thing.

Kayleigh: What would bring the juggler to a building site? Circus/Work?

But still in the form of a vacuum cleaner. I was thinking of a funky circus bus

He is nervous because of performing in public. He needs practice but is embarrassed. Albeit heavy
objects, it'll work out in the sense that the cartoon's anatomy is strong. Something on the basis of Mr.
Incredible in terms of cartoon muscularity.

Kayleigh: At a building site there is a load of stuff to throw around! The ''VC'' could be his audience?

I want the juggler to juggle debris into the ''VC''. I can't even word it properly. I want the juggler to
be frustrated...and angry.

Kayleigh: The juggler is looking for a confidence boost to get over his nerves of performing in public?

Yes. He, firstly gets kicked out of the 'circus wagon'. I mean literally, his performance before the
animation is dreadful and now he is sulking. Beside a grimy, building site. Something like this.
The project taking place on this building site is inactive, because work schedule is called off on this
specific day of the animation.

Kayleigh: Yeah I like the circus wagon bus idea, you can really go to town designing that! it would
certainly make an attention grabbing entrance.

I was hoping that could take 10 seconds-ish, something which introduces the immediacy which grabs
the tension of the spectator watching the animation. It happens to introduce the problem. The juggler
is alone. Maybe the juggler takes his anger out by juggling all of the rocks/bricks/debris. I don't know.

Speaking more about the prop now: The vacuum cleaner is very much like Dumbo. In respect to it's
neglect, and the design of Dumbo. Elephant features.

Kayleigh: The ''VC'' could be disowned too.

The trunk being the funnel of the ''VC''. In respect to Dumbo... It wears circus clothing too!
So the ''VC'' is also an abandoned circus star, or wants to be one...

Kayleigh: So in the beginning, he is also kicked out with the juggler?

Would that work do you think? This building is still in operation. Maybe it could be a new project.
Most of the furniture is still there.
Dreams of New Eden by Dayle Sanders

Kayleigh: Night time or day time?

Dusk, sunset maybe. An unspecific time in the afternoon/evening, signified by the colour of the sky
and the backdrop.

Kayleigh: So it could be in operation just as the builders are leaving to go home.

Could be. Maybe the circus is nearby the building site--In viewpoint anyway! Maybe this juggle guy is
on the sulk because he performed rubbish. The vacuum cleaner needs to tie into this somehow. Maybe
the vacuum cleaner could be a big elephant.

Kayleigh: That makes a lot more sense, could have booing in the background from the circus as he
walks onto the building site... to give the impression of a bad performance.

To save time and reinforce imagery instead of showing the crowd, the vacuum cleaner is not part of
the circus. But is, one of the jugglers most celebrated fans...

Kayleigh: Thrown out as a piece of rubbish? It is coming together gradually.

The juggler cleans the place up by going crazy juggle. The ''VC'' goes mental and eats it all.
And then. It's a pretty dreadful direction, but I'm not sure what else I have on offer at this time.

Kayleigh: Of course! ''VC''s don't like mess! that works.

Exactly! I want to attach life to this prop. Confronts attention to the juggler. Suddenly bursts out with
joy, because he adores this juggler as a "celebrity".

Kayleigh: They could form a double act at the end and become famous to end it?

How would that happen? What would be their act? The juggler juggles loads of the debris; the juggler
could be an octopus in terms of this plot mechanism. Maybe the juggler can juggle loads of these
objects. Then pile them down. Then BAM.

Kayleigh: I like the juggler being an octopus because that would make sense and work... not sure if it
would work with the ''VC'' and building site though. I see what you mean. If you apply too animals:
the octopus, may actually feel out of place on land.

Underwater and all..Building site undersea...? Atlantis? Titanic? Now that's overkill.

Kayleigh: *BBBOOOOM*

What's the sodding ''VC'' going to be doing?! Maybe the juggler is angry...And reflects on his bad
experience by perching down on the building site. He begins to juggle slowing, trying to recreate his
happy mood by way of diversion to permit so. The '''VC''' could act surreptitiously. It sneakily '''VC'''s
and distracts the juggling activity. It can turn into some chase scene, and the pillars of the building
site can be used as left and right entrances.

Kayleigh: What about a nervous cleaner (OCD)?

Yeah okay. The juggler is OCD. What about the ''VC'', should it also be OCD? The juggler perches.
Gazes.

Kayleigh: You sure you want the '''VC''' as a character? I think that is what is confusing it...try having
it as a prop.

I wasn't disregarding it as a prop! It is not necessarily a whole character, I mean. I was aiming to
develop this prop into something interactive. The juggler: he cleans up the some of the building site to
unleash frenzy of angry. He is an OCD juggler. The '''VC''' cleans it all up? Then explodes.

Summary: Circus is displeased with juggler. Juggler sulks. Juggler walks and perches down at nearby
building site, where it is quiet and inactive. He has OCD. He uses the '''VC''' to clean stuff up. '''VC'''
explodes. But, via the explosion, the juggler is suddenly so much better at his profession, as though it
Dreams of New Eden by Dayle Sanders

was some Bruce Almighty thing? He has an accident. It affects him. In resolution, it makes his abilities
better.

Kayleigh: I think you got it till the Bruce Almighty thing going on at the end... it seems like 'ta da!' his
problems are solved by magic.

Okay. But if I cut that idea, should I just end with him looking all scatty: dirty, dusty, mucky from the
explosion? He gives a funny face/eyebrow at camera (us).

Kayleigh: laughter from the circus to end the scene?

Maybe his "true" profession is being a slap-stick/dare devil? Maybe it's all a dream?

Kayleigh: Yeah, he was trying to be a juggler but had no talent at all. Then BAM!

Via the explosion, The building site topples onto the circus. This story route is very distorted, and the
reality of the situation is not as comedic. Can it be do you reckon?

Kayleigh: That's it! going back to you OCD juggler the explosion at the end can send him back into the
circus.

To the sound of cranes? And general building site activity in nearby vicinity. How can that send him
back?

Kayleigh: If it is all a dream, this could be a bad idea... it is the easy way out... so to say.

Definitely. It's one exit. I feel I achieved one route through my plot. Great. Now I want alternatives to
beat it. The circus is behind the building site the explosion sends him in the air and back into the
circus tent.

Kayleigh: I like this!

He somehow lands...in a pose. Taking all the glory and fan eruption? Maybe he flies into the circus
again.

Kayleigh: It won't be the softest of landings XD

Maybe he lands on one of the other performers. Then they all end up creating, a somewhat,
unintentional display of standing ovation. Like some brazen event at the circus; ninja's bred with
cheerleaders?

Kayleigh: Depends how you want to end it. But I like the standing ovation.

I want to end it in the sense that he reforms himself, and his overall success. Embarrassment is
washed out. Through use of...'The inciting incident', when he touches and operates that vacuum
cleaner, he initiates this.

Kayleigh: Would surviving the fall be worth a standing ovation?

Well no. He lands safely on something. He's a very unlucky guy. Maybe I could think about the man's
traits, and assign them to role in with these possibilities. He is unlucky, but this 'unexplainable' event
just happens.

Kayleigh: You want him to be confident again?

I want him to, through unexplainable events (aka explosion of '''VC''' in abandoned building site) to
regain his success

Kayleigh: Forming an act with the '''VC'''?

The '''VC''' would have to have a 'pulse'. It would need to be alive, in this sense, to work as though the
character and the prop were an act. If it explodes, that wouldn't happen
Dreams of New Eden by Dayle Sanders

Kayleigh: Can go back to the human/Dumbo idea...so '''VC''' is not a prop?

Well it is...just it has expressions. Maybe it's too much. Think: Mr. Bean. I want to capture this type of
character and smother my juggler with it. Also, I like the characters of Mr. Incredible and Linguini
(from ratatouille). He's a numpty. I want to 'numptify' this guy like.

Kayleigh: If the '''VC''' and the juggler both have OCD they would become friends, maybe something
connective...

It's a Henry '''VC''' (a Dayle made '''VC''' or something).

Kayleigh: It doesn't have to have a face... think of the brooms in fantasia... how they move shows
expression. You could think about the bow the 'trunk' would move... the dust bag inflating and
deflating - happy and sad.

Stop feeding me such high rank ideas Kayleigh! These are too overwhelming! You and your genius!
;-)

Kayleigh: You have a massive range of ideas to work with there! XD

'''VC'''s can shove it! Some of my ideas already are stupid! The idea that the '''VC''' could inflate and
deflate the emotion is one to consider for final development. The value of this idea is incredible like!

Kayleigh: no problem partner ;) great energetic ideas going on! Yeah that sound would really add
character. I have another idea for my story but this one is more comedic...

Spill it, or else!

Kayleighs notes:

Idea #1: 1890's Edwardian/Victorian era a time period with oil lamps and my detective discovers a
light bulb or the 'mystery item' we might say... the detective is trying to find what it is/does and his
kitchen turns into a DIY laboratory of pots and pans in his kitchen in the end I'm thinking something
going wrong the trigger would be a mysterious flash of light coming from a house across the street?
finding the bulb in the gutter outside (dropped sample?)

The kitchen laboratory is the new part... came up with it today trying to get the kitchen involved in
the story... I'm looking into Sherlock Holmes for period and character inspiration and liking the film
noir style...

Dayle: It's got loads of depth to it. Research into the clothing style of that period/how oil lamps work,
how the vessel works and such, and all those kitchen goodies and surroundings. I really like it.

So my detective has poor eyesight, he is making dinner in the kitchen, his glasses fall into his pot of
soup...goes to the fridge instead of the cupboard and gets an egg thinking its a bulb. Screws the egg
into the socket and turns the light on... BOOM! scrambled egg for dinner! He cant see so he goes to
the fridge instead of the cupboard because he cant see.

Dayle: Fridges in the Edwardian/Victorian era?

He grabs the egg--this would be more modern this one...

Dayle: :)

That's the decision I have to make... do I want it to be serious therefore time period based or
comedic. I'm just a lil slow on the up take. Lol.

Dayle: Play with both. It'll create two avenues for both your two ideas. That way you have four
branching scenarios, if you get me?

Mix them together? Mix the two ideas together?... but I just realised the second scenario doesn't really
say detective character to me...
Dreams of New Eden by Dayle Sanders

Dayle: No. I meant. You have idea 1 and 2 in the bag, right? Now you have scenario 1A: comedy. Or
1B: serious. For your second idea, it'll work like 2A or 2B. Do you want to kite them around these
genres?

Oh I get you now. I'm unsure of the comedy on though... how would you know he was a detective?

Dayle: Comedy all the way.

I want the audience to think oh he is a detective but how would they see that?

Dayle: By clothing. And touch of sepia.

Lol.

Dayle: Which you can throw over the whole video.

Clothing is the obvious thing but would wear it if he is at home making his dinner XD

Dayle: Retrieve clothing style. Think of some badass Rorschach from Watchmen. Have the clothes
slung over on a chair? He's a typical lazy domestic cool detective dude. Table + chair + kitchen. Then
your guy, he does his snooping before he arrives back home. He's like "sod it", I'll keep my stuff on.

He could get out detective night vision goggles when the bulb blows!

Dayle: Men in black springs to mind.

Yeah and they could have something wrong with them and he can still get the egg and the build mixed
up :)

Dayle: Is he going to be smoking? Bags under eyes? Rough character?

Yep. This will be if I go for the serious one... yeah smoking, the unshaved face, shebang but probably
not for the funny one.

Dayle: Hmm. Okay, sure. Now for comedy. Give him a lanky, skinny figure? He looks tired. long day
at work? Tiredness adds to fatigue = being a clumsy poo. Maybe you could give him his investigators
scope? He leaves it in his back pocket, after taking off his jacket. It shows off subtle identity.

Would make sense. Magnifying glass?

Dayle: Yeah that one. Obviously, a real detective wouldn't leave such a tool in his back pocket. ;-)
But this guy is pissed. He is fatigued from work. Or both. And wants an egg for dinner

Both is good.

Dayle: I'm kidding about the egg for dinner by the way...

Could be wanting a omelet... yum! :P He could still be trying to work by reading over a case file
document thing therefore he is distracted? Constantly working? Work-a-holic.

Dayle: You know it.

Idea 1: Juggler is upset about his performance. He literally gets 'kicked' out. Audible boos can be
heard. He gets up. Brushes himself. Treads heavily in a sulk towards the building site nearby/ a runic
area beside the circus, the building site, and a prairie with a horizon. He perches, gazes, reflects on
his performance. Roughly 10-20 seconds have passed; necessary means of transitions to get to the
point, obviously. Walking isn't needed, this will be indicated. Now he has OCD in this idea. Does the
'VC' act as an elephant like with trunk as the pipe, a ''VC'' with emotion (think: Dumbo)? Kayleigh also
suggested the animated brooms from Fantasia. I am stuck with two (or more) avenues to work from.
Dreams of New Eden by Dayle Sanders

Okay, So what does the 'VC' do? Why is it there? What means? What measures do I take to
incorporate it?

Idea 2: Andriana: Is the 'VC' part of the circus? Both juggler and 'VC' are inept, and get iced out, or
maybe we should forget the icing out thing for now. What if the juggler is a mechanical device (robot)
performing in the circus? So it can link with the elephant 'VC'? What if it was a robot circus? Look at
Treasure Planet (2002).

Phil comments: "Love this post! :-) I love collaborative working too. It gets very exciting.

But hold on - aren't you missing something obvious here?

Let's imagine for an instant that the juggler is a wannabe juggler who, when the story starts is
working as... a cleaner: a cleaner who dreams of one day performing to crowds of people in the new
vaudeville theatre that is being built on the other side of the road. He watches the theatre's
construction as he hoovers his office block - and while the theatre progresses, he secretly practices
juggling in readiness to go across to the theatre and make his name. It could end very sadly, actually
- with an Act 3 reveal, in which the audience (and the cleaner) are lead to believe that he's going to
get what he wants as he's welcomed into the theatre and what he thinks is his dream job, only for us
to learn that he's been employed by the theatre management - to be the cleaner.... sigh

You could cut between the construction of the theatre and the character improving his circus skills - in
a montage-type sequence. On the outside of the construction site's perimeter you could even have a
poster advertising for 'Stage Acts & Performers - Open Auditions Upon Completion' - or similar.

Beware over-complicating the back-story; you haven't got much time to set-up the emotional life of
your character, and you're going to have to do it visually - so far, the building site doesn't feel
genuinely integrated into the mechanics of the story... anyway, see what you think - and, don't be
qualmish - 'tutorphil' is your writing partner too :D"

Draft scripts/Story development


Part 2

I'm really glad Phil suggested the "vaudeville''. It is a superior alternative: it fulfills what time period I
should set the animation in, and, works brilliantly as the 'to be' building site. (I just wasn't sure what
the name was for this.) In short, this term is synonymous with variety theater. The tastes of the
public come to influence not only the composition of the shows, but the very architecture of the
theater buildings, which become gathering places as well as fun. Anyway, the conception of this idea
is fruitful. Comedy mixed couplets/renaissance style/sepia and filmic. As a massive bonus, I was
inclined to go with something baroque in the first place. I have a couple of inspirations at my disposal,
and I'm glad now that I can choose to use them in my visual buildups.

Obviously, I know when to draw the line. I'm not going to fart around with the technicality of this unit:
I want to stay within the gates of my capabilities, in order to get the job down. I have gained a few
more creative and technical solutions today at work. I introduced this unit to a couple of my
colleagues - I asked them what they would do with the three objects if they had to make a 1 minute
animation. Upon explaining Phil's structure of the plot to my colleagues, here are some of them that I
noted (ones that would work with this idea because they expand from it/help cement areas which
were plot):

· We established that the juggler works best as a 'wannabe'/his talents come and go, and
generally this is at a turbulent rate. Therefore, he should be equipped with a kind of eccentricity.
While the fictitious city is not important (I'll work on a bit of background to help me map out the
environment surrounding the vaudeville), I want the area surrounding the construction of this
Vaudeville to be of first-magnitude. This is the BIG talk that everyone's on about.

· The Vaudeville is in construction. There are adverts everywhere/a massive banner nearby the
theatre to emphasis construction and esteem for it's grand opening. Auditions are taking place in
readiness for the opening (the sign will also note that all auditionees must bring they're bits and bobs
(the juggling balls)).
Dreams of New Eden by Dayle Sanders

· The juggler juggles, drops the balls, renovation is taking place, one of the workers operating
the hoover sucks the ball up. It explodes!

· Maybe objects fly out of the explosion, and the juggler is forced to catch them in order to
protect himself?

________________________________________________________________

Main character to plot:


1. Who is my lead character? Chas, the Juggler.

2. What do they want? What do they need to learn about the world or themselves? If they
can achieve their dream by making it into the roster for the New Eden Vaudeville.

3. What is the worst possible thing that can happen to this particular character and how
will this adversity make them change? Or, if it is a tragedy, realise too late what they should
have done to change. Chas is nervous because there are hundreds of other circus
auditionees practicing outside. Through the heat of Chas' practice, something goes
incredibly wrong (the Xanthos explodes). Miraculously, Chas winces hard and attempts to
catch all of it in a suitable 'vaudeville' style. He is very lucky - thus impressing everyone.

Onto more specific questions:

• Who is s/he? A simpleton; a plebe, with a hidden talent to juggle - where talent is
triggered by strange events.
• What problems does s/he already face in his or her life? Chas has a very simple life, with a
conflicting personality to go with it. He wants to try to be the best, so this poses a problem
to him.
• What does s/he want? To be accepted on the New Eden theatre program, for new try outs.
• What will s/he be forced to do to get what s/he wants? Everyone is practicing, but trying
to impress. Chas' natural ability to juggle is good, but when problems start to surface; his
adrenaline enabled, he performs much better.
• What is his/her moral weakness or character flaw?
• What does s/he fear most? Causing unnecessary attention.
• Who is his/her main opponent? There isn't one, but the other performers do trigger his
nerves.
• How does the main character attack his/her weakness? By unintentionally catching the
objects which propel from the xanthos' explosion.
• How does the lead character confront his/her greatest fear? He is nervous at first, but
admirer and assistant controller of the xanthos, Margarita, is impressed. She gets fascinated
very easily by the smallest of things. She sees that Chas is naturally talented at juggling.
Conversely, this works as a confidence boost to Chas, to the point where he tries too hard
to please, then careens posture and invites problem.
• What will s/he learn during the story? Take risks.
• How does what s/he learns resolve the conflict between what s/he wants, what s/he needs
to learn and what s/he has had to do to get it? Take risks. The fear of the unknown and
exclusion will always be current topics/ he can perform well through adrenaline rush.
• How does the story end? After the somewhat random climatic suspense, Chas and
Margarita become bitter sweet lovers. Stupid, really. In a nutshell: If you are a dreaming
dreamer, you may not always get what you desire. But, in pursuit for happiness (the road to
becoming what you truly want to become) you may develop new desires, which ultimately
grow from the seed of the first. Ultimately, the explosion 'explodes' Chas into success.

The juggler, Chas, is one of these dreaming dreamers. He wants to be a "New Eden"
juggler. What a celebrated hotspot! Chas tries too hard when practicing for the auditioning
Dreams of New Eden by Dayle Sanders

rehearsals at the Vaudeville. He eventually confronts Margarita, who is the designated


operator of the Xanthos*. The "whisper of the heart" is Chas' new desire: love struck. His
emotional density towards love matters therefore forbids him to express it correctly - in fact
Chas blushes up - he tries too hard to impress her, falls down during a stunt, and drops his
juggling balls**. Within radius of both characters is the Xanthos and unfortunately the
machine gobbles the juggling balls. Unable on how to resolve the situation, both characters
(and eventually crowd) are alarmed by the loud noises that the machine begins making.
Both characters begin flailing around, especially Margarita, through belief that her ineptitude
for managing small tasks is the cause. There is an explosion. Wincing and believing, (Chas
is a believing believer) Chase focuses on trying to catch most of the objects.

* - Maybe the Xanthos could be the following, to help debunk and reduce exaggerations:

•An immobile vacuum cleaner which collects small debris/dirt. Upon explosion, all of the dirt
acts as stage fog (if you will). When Chas attempts with might to catch the objects,
especially his prized juggling balls (no pun intended) he collects more than he can believe.
Through the elation of this building situation, Chas' nerves are no longer with him.
Everything prior to this moment 'awakens' his circus born momentum. Thus, the dirt plays
as a major element to reinforce the aura of suspense: the dirty aura of mystery. When the
dirt disperses, the form that was Chas is now strikingly picturesque. He literally 'puts on a
show'.

** - The juggling balls are instrumentalities. Without self-provided equipment - the


auditioning process requires this (maybe a poster shot within the animatic) - there is rising
tension left with Chas. He is left in stress when the Xanthos gobbles them up. Through the
mistake he has committed, he has provoked the unnecessary attention of the other
auditionees. Great! It looks like Margarita does not know what she is doing either. Both
characters are left flailing about the situation, more so when loud noises begin to start.

The ending is not completely obvious. The viewer notices at the beginning of the 1 minute
clip that Chas lives on his own. When Margarita enters the equation, love must surely be
certain? Well yes, sort of. Who would have guessed that the Xanthos would have exploded
Chas to being famous, and falling in love. So as you can probably understand, the ending I
have prepared for this creative piece is far-fetched. Due to the nature of such an ending, it
should be romantic and comedic; minor humour patches. With the cyclone of dust and dirt
now gone, Chas is positioned professionally carrying his juggling balls - a suitable
Vaudeville-styled finale***. He receives a standing ovation, and a peck on the cheek from a
transfixed Margarita. Both characters share expressions of euphoric ascension.

*** - Heroic alternative: Margaritas life is at peril when the explosion happens. In order for
this alternative to work, Chas would need to have a much larger frame, as well as being
nimble. When the cyclone of dust/dirt ceases, surrounding crowds see that he has safely
caught his circus instruments and other objects, protecting Margarita from harm of these
falling objects. This alternative provides the animatic with sub-genres: action and peril.

In summation to writing this post, I feel as though I have travelled through the galaxy of
my head. I have alchemised initial seeds of thought into a resolved ending. The question is,
will this work? What is utmost important is that in reading this post, it stresses the pinnacle
to the ending of my story, via the multiple branches that I have created. Can you now see
the mental image that I have in preparation for this unit? I want to unfold it in a smooth
manner. When I eventually create and revise my 'Scribd' document, I will make sure to
enumerate the bits and bobs. I'll cluster parts 1 and 2 from screenwriting Practice.
________________________________________________________________
Dreams of New Eden by Dayle Sanders

Character Biography 1

Name: Chas
Birthplace: Valle Blue, New York.
Birthday: 12 September 1908
Gender: Male
Age: 22
Height: 185 cm (6 '1')
Weight: 71.6kg (158 lbs.)
Blood Type: A
Character: Chas is an aspiring guy. He openly asserts himself to someday be part of the
New Eden Vaudeville, bringing to it something unique and special. Despite occasional
clumsiness (which can lead to unexpected events) he has a caring personality, but is dense
in regards of girls and love matters. A fairly tall, lean-built person with peach skin and
brown eyes, and black vintage short and neat hair.

Dress sense: Casual garments, worn/washed out colours, and a midnight-blue top.

Their IQ: 127


Favourite food: Breast of Chicken a la Rose
Favourite music: Swing jazz

Final notes: His talent comes and goes at a turbulent rate. Therefore, he should be
equipped with a kind of eccentricity.
Dreams of New Eden by Dayle Sanders

Character Biography 2

Name: Margarita
Birthplace: El Mosquetero, New York.
Birthday: 04 May 1909
Gender: Female
Age: 21
Height: 170 cm (5 '7')
Weight: 59.3kg (131 lbs.)
Blood Type: B
Character: Margarita is strikingly innocent and meek. Often, she will express self-doubt and
worry. Overall she is kind-hearted, and very bubbly. She shows much ineptitude for tasks
required for an assistant, usually ending with a mess. She is also fairly tall, attractive, with
tanned skin, blue eyes, and curly gold hair.

Dress sense: She wears some colourful fabrics, reminiscent of the "roaring 20's", and
working boots.

Their IQ: 154


Favourite food: Apple Charlotte
Favourite music: Swing jazz

Final notes: Her characteristics will be visually obvious - the ineptitude to manage the
Xanthos brilliantly - etc.
Dreams of New Eden by Dayle Sanders

A meeting with Tracey

Let's think about superfluous details to reduce complexity:

-1500 word count...


-...to critically 'analyse' one film (do not 'narrate' it)
-Write the question out
-Bullet point
-Film is the example
-Look up occupations/the production
-Camera movement/effects by doing what?
-What has been written about film editing?
-What you are being asked to write about is the 'relationship' between story
and structure; you should consider camera movement, editing, and order of
scenes.

-Camera movement order of scenes & how things have been edited.
-Quote ideas and choose a film and look at how structure works/enhances storyline
-SEE how you have analysed the film
-Discuss small plot
-Small scenes, and sets
-Analyse them in terms of structure
-You know, the "oh shiny". WHAT IS GOING ON IN THE FILM TO MAKE IT SHINY?
-E.G. Memento (2000) Directed by Christopher Nolan: order of scenes purposely
back to front so we, the audience, are affected. Effectively information is revealed to us so
that we feel like the character in the film. This was done through the use
aforementioned techniques- you need to support this with evidence!

Main Essay

Where the film [Rec] (2007) directed by Jaume Balagueró, has now been replaced with The
Blair Witch Project (1999) Directed by Daniel Myrick, as this already centralises on
'mockumentary' style (more easier and more direct to work around), as highlighted by Phil.
This decision was a recent one, therefore, I have been unable to update the structure below
with quotes and concerning information.

Paragraph 1)
- Transcribe relevant findings regarding story and structure. Why is it important? (It is a
critical essay. Your reader takes this for granted.) A really strong quote referring to
information can empower the start to the essay. By considering essences such as camera
movement, editing, and order of scenes, you can contribute towards findings which will help
you to resolve the relationship between the story and structure of chosen topic. Extract and
transcribe information from the quote-this should flow easily onto paragraph 2.

Paragraph 2)
- In view of the considerable success of the first [Rec] and taking into account the visual
challenge offered by the film and the audiences engagement. Is it a free experience by
simply making it a little bit more dramatic? Novel experience? The concept of a single
camera as a single point of view of history (the audience feel like they are the cameraman;
the silent protagonist...)

Paragraph 3)
- Talk about initial engagement; nausea which is created through visual means of the
cameraman. Abrupt movements, natural feeling, hardly no editing. What enriched essences
such as camera movement, editing, and order of scenes? Also, consider that [Rec] is a
Dreams of New Eden by Dayle Sanders

Spanish film. Editing of subtitles to give audience reaction and sympathy for cameraman
and characters.

Paragraph 4)
- What do you think of technological change that allows everyone to become a film (the
camera is the central engagement?) Again, this is the idea that wins. It is easier from a
technical standpoint, we all have a camera at hand without knowing it. Who is the editor?
Screenplay, etc. How did they accomplish this, etc.

Paragraph 5)
- Evolve from paragraph 4, let it flow. The story in [Rec] had to be credible, authentic. The
cameraman is a journalist. For maximum capacity, the idea of jerky camera movement and
abrupt order of scenes (E.G. The camera is the source of information for the audience.
When it falls and switches off before many inevitable climaxes, the audience is left in gasp
because they are unsure what is happening. The action is void until the camera is turned on
again.) Abruption is key to fast-paced action. Identity that you see the healthy karma. The
mechanics of the film work because...?

Paragraph 6)
- Flow from paragraph 5. Don't lose the reader here (this is the pinnacle of the essay).
Revisit the strong quote/sources which aid in your understanding of the filmic essences such
as camera movement, editing, and order of scenes. Stick with it. The relationship is smooth
and tolerant, the viewer is seeing how the instrumental tool (the camera) plays an
important part in horror. Successfully, the horror is maintained through visual abruption and
the importance of this format is very relative to the relationship between the story and
structure of [Rec].

Working Essay Introduction

This essay is an investigation critically analysing the relationship between story and
structure in one film, The Blair Witch Project (1999) Directed by Daniel Myrick. This film
established the 'mockumentary' style genre; the credibility of the movie lies in its views of
the mise-en-scène, which creates suspenseful sequences without music and almost no cuts
and edits. Source material includes by Jeffrey A Weinstock's 'Nothing that is: millennial
cinema and the Blair witch controversies', which unwraps The Blair Witch Project by
exploring key critiques and the perception on American independent cinema, and Jon Lewis'
'The end of cinema as we know it: American film in the nineties', which, through arguments
and examples, identifies several references for and against the uncertainty of the film, as
well as information on character, and narrative. This assignment will start by analysing the
established mockumentary style in film, techniques, angles, movements, and their effects,
before continuing onto the narrative structure and the framework of point-of-view which is
created by Cinema Verite. Final points will acknowledge how the relationship eventually
affects specific scenes of the film.

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