The Challenge in Myself

By: Jaira D. Veras

It has been a year when this disability challenged me. I experienced anxiety attacks,
I worry about everything. I wake up in absolute terror because there is this voice
gnawing at me and it gets louder every day. I lock myself up in a room for no reason at
all. I convince myself that I am worthless, that I can’t do anything right, that I am
weak. I am my worst enemy!

I struggled to reconcile the facts of my existence, I know that something was wrong
with me but I didn’t know what to do, I know I need help but to whom will I call for
help. Anxiety tells me that everyone who shows love towards me are fakes, that they
just use me for their successes. It has been a heavy burden for a weakened heart like
me to bear. I tried to take my own life so as to end this burden but then I failed. Even
death was a puzzle to me.

From the last time that I did the act with regret was also the realization that I need
a professional help but I have trust issues to deal with at first, but I know I want to be
healed.

The professional tried to ask me about my unusual experiences and how I deal with
them, he understood the burden I was constantly carrying and the more I have shared
with him, the more I was enlightened and relieved. But it was not a success overnight.
There were instances when I became too sensitive about the jokes of my classmate
that I ended up hurting her. I yelled at my siblings because they annoy me. I am pissed
but I lash my fury on others. I found difficulty in dealing with my anger even on petty
things. I lose interest on activities I’ve loved before. I was fretting and worrying too
much and I got discouraged easily.

The professional told me those are symptoms of depression and I am suffering

from this mood disorder. As defined, depression is a disorder of the mind that causes a
persistent feeling of sadness and loss of interest. It requires a long term treatment and
it is not easy to be fully healed by it.

With the diagnosis of the professional, I became more morose, I was all alone in
my room, crying my heart out. My mind was clouded with the memories that I want to
forget, I can’t endure it anymore. I stood up and looked out at the window, one
question pops up, “Is it right to give up?”, then I realized that what if it was only a
challenge given to me to test my character. To measure how strong I am and I realized
right there that it was time to test the waters but I know I have to fix myself first.

I chose to undergo therapy as well as medication. I am grateful to be given those

medicines which can calm and help me deal with my moods. I undergo psychotherapy
or popularly known as talk therapy wherein I was taught to develop appropriate coping
skills for dealing with every day’s challenges. Aside from the therapy and medication, I
was eating food with proper nutrition, I tried to get eight hours of sleep, plenty of rest
and exercise. I try my best to battle depression.
There was also a big support system around me, they encourage me to speak about
my battle openly. At first, it was hard for me to talk about me, it took a lot of courage,
confidence and trust. With that, I know I was not alone with my battle. Eventually, I
know I will emerge as the victor.
 The War of the Next Generation
By Riezel Ejol Emmanuelle V. Magistrado

After the wars of the past centuries, the world is finally at peace. But as always,
there is nothing permanent in this world except CHANGE, this peace will not be eternal,
it will not last forever. There will be upcoming wars in the next years and it can’t be
helped because of different views, different personalities and different goals. The Third
World is not a myth, it can be a reality.

The Third World War is about to start at the year 3000 or the third millennium.
There will be an approximate death of around one hundred fifty million as collateral
damage to the third World War. This is according to one of the predictions of
Nostradamus supported by Carl Sagan why there is a strong probability of another
world war.

What makes third world war different from the two world wars? First, because of
the rising technology we are currently in, there will be an influx of new and advanced
technologies such as tanks, fighter planes, bombs and others. Definitely these
technologies will be used as military tools by nations participating in the war. For what
reason? Domination of the world.

The conquest of the world has been every nation’s dream, it is the end-goal for
supremacy of every leader in any part of the world. The United States of America which
has been facing political and economic troubles will not rest from the dream of being a
superpower again, this can only be done if it will start a war and earn millions of dollars
for rehabilitation. With its share of territories around the world including the Philippines,
it will be able to build a strong base for elite military groups. Japan can also start the
war because so far, it is the most advanced state at present, it can bring about
technological warfare to the world. Not to forget the power of China at present with its
cache of nuclear weapons it can either wage a military or biological wars at its
opponents.

What is the stand of the United Nations at this? The goal of invasion is at its peak
even at this millennium but it will escalate in the future because of unstoppable and
unresolved issues such as terrorism, civil wars, human rights violations and others.
Though the United Nations will continue to advocate peace, it will be having hard time
propagating it around the world where conflicts are in the process of escalation.

There is nothing beautiful in War. It is terrible in every angle, it spells out death and
destruction and it does not promote true winners but rather losers to those who will be
participating. If peace will be propagated and spread with the use of heart than the
mind then the people will learn that there will be no benefits from the war.