7 Tips for Helping Your Child with Math

at Home (When You Hate Math)

April 13, 2020

Richard Blankman Shaped Staff

If you feel lost when your child asks for help learning mathematics, you can take comfort
in knowing you’re not alone. Teachers, parents, and PhD students—even biologists,
chemists, and physicists—sometimes feel daunted by math. Add to that the fact that
math education isn’t as static as we might like it to be. As we better understand learning
and the human brain, the ways in which we teach math inevitably evolve. For many,
the sorts of problems and strategies that comprise the “new math” can seem
impenetrable.

But fear not! There is hope with growing evidence that your reaction to math, while
completely understandable, is more related to how your parents, teachers, and peers
talked about it than anything related to your brain.

Ways to Help Your Kids with Math

You don't have to go from math phobic to mathematician overnight, but here are some
tips to help foster the math whiz in your child. 

1. Avoid saying you’re bad at math. Stay positive!

This is probably the most far-reaching tip in terms of how much it will benefit your child.
If you feel inclined to say something like “It’s fine that you’re bad at math, so was I,” bite
your tongue! Counterintuitive to many, research suggests that the concept of being a
“math person”—or not—is a myth. Even if that’s firmly how you feel right now, one of the
best ways to avoid passing math anxiety on to your children is by steering clear of
negative messages about math. Instead, try focusing on difficulty and effort by saying
things like, “I understand how difficult this is for you. It was difficult for me too,” or “Don’t
worry if it feels like math problems take more effort than some of your other
assignments. You may not understand it yet, but I am confident we can work it out
together.”

Additional Resources

 “What Does It Mean to Have a Limitless Mind” blog post  (includes book excerpt)
 “Healthy Habits for a Growth Mindset in Math” blog post  (includes free poster)
 Method to the Mathness podcast, Season 2, Episode 3 (“Math Positive Mindsets”
featuring Dr. Carrie Cutler; also see her book Math-Positive Mindsets: Growing A
Child's Mind Without Losing Yours)
2. Talk about math.

Talking about math doesn’t have to mean making a nuanced statistical analysis or
debating what equation best models a phenomenon. Talking about math can be as
simple as counting clouds or guessing heights. This is especially crucial for young
children who need to feel comfortable just thinking about math and seeing that it is a
part of the world. Depending on the age of your child, find ways to incorporate math into
any topic you’re talking about as the opportunity arises:

 How many is that? How many would I have if I had another one?
 What would half of that look like?
 How could I split this equally?
 How do you predict this trend will change over time?
 What’s the chance of that happening?
 How can you make that more abstract? (The whole purpose of mathematics is to
take ideas and make them abstract!)
 How many cards will you draw?

 
 

If you don’t feel comfortable talking about math, look for other ways for math to be a part
of your child's discourse and experiences. Consider watching movies and television
together that feature math (for example, CBS’s former TV show Numb3rs for older
students) or even simply hanging math-related posters near where your child typically
studies.

Additional Resources

 HMH Into Math  Anchor Chart Posters (Grades K–8)

 Supporting the Mathematical Practices and Processes Through Questioning
Poster
3. Frame this moment as a chance for kids to explore whatever math
question interests them.

Most teachers must get through a particular set of standards every year. That can leave
students who are curious about an unrelated part of math disappointed or frustrated
because there simply isn’t enough time to explore it. Standards and assessments are
important but try to free yourself from worrying about whether your kid’s question is too
easy, too hard, or even part of the curriculum. Keep in mind that math can be an
effective tool to approach nearly any question. If you’re tempted to answer a question
with, “You should know this by now,” “That sounds way too hard,” or “That doesn’t
matter,” instead direct the curious mind to the teacher or active math educators on
social media. How would they approach the question?

Moreover, connect math to what interests your child. Do they like animals? Have them
explore how many animals are in a zoo, how much space they need, or how much they
cost to obtain. Do they like fire trucks? Find out how heavy they are or how much water
they can pump out in a minute. What about video games? Challenge them to record
their scores in a table or graph.

Additional Resources

 Math at Work Web Series

 Real-World Mathematics at Home: 10 Investigations for Students  (Math Solutions
blog post)

4. Have your child teach you math.

Here’s a great way to learn something—teach it. Ask any teacher. Most will agree that
even when it’s something “simple” that they could swear they knew inside and out, once
they have to explain it to someone else, they’re forced to consolidate knowledge and try
new ways of explaining it. When faced with a question that you can’t answer, explain
that you're stuck too, and challenge your kids to figure it out just well enough that they
can try to explain it to you. Even if they help you only a little bit, they may spark insights
that allow you to finish where they left off.

5. Try the new math.

If the thought of “new math” intimidates you, it's understandable. How is it your third
grader is taking home math problems that stump you?! Rest assured, the “new math” is
no different from the “old math.” If you double 15, you still get 30. If you multiply 6 and 3,
you still get 18. It’s not that multiplication, division, and fractions have radically changed;
it’s just that we now have better tools for explaining them.

One major source of contention is how multiplication that previously took just a few lines
to work through now involve seemingly endless equations and diagrams. However, it's
important to note that students are learning fundamental strategies that let them
conceive of 6 × 3 in a way that extends to 60 × 30, 1/6 × 1/3, and 0.6 × 3,000,000. This
way, they will be able to group the concept of multiplication deeply enough to lean
on whatever method helps them, even the quick algorithms you might be more used to.

 
 

Instead of saying, “This is way too hard and confusing,” show the method you use as
just another strategy. For example, “I've never seen multiplication this way before.
Here's the method I would use. Now let's try to learn this other method together. It's
hard for both of us!”

Additional Resources

 Math in Focus Grade 4 Heuristics Poster (Guidance on strategies you can try)

6. Do away with “drill and kill.”

Those of us who remember sheets full of multiplication problems to be solved quickly

might have a skewed view of what it truly means to master math. Evidence suggests
this is why you’re probably wary of math in the first place!

Yes, there are standards, benchmarks, and state assessments. However, those are not
what make up math. The deep, multifaceted tool that is mathematics is very different
from the blunt hammer that is fast arithmetic. Look for activities and projects where
math is only part of the challenge. Or look for games and puzzles where math is a code
to be cracked or a grid to be solved. Count beats in music, and look for addition and
multiplication in dance steps. Math should be active and playful, not worksheets of
sterile and monotonous problems.

Additional Resources

 Method to the Mathness podcast, Season 2, Episode 1 (“Cathy Seeley, Tasks,

Tests, and Teamwork”)
 The Giant Sculpture Gallery: A Math Puzzle (Grades 5+)
 HMH's Pinterest Math Hub

7. Take it slow.

One final word of advice. The same tools you might use to solve any problem apply
here. Take breaks. Try a different way. Ask someone else. Everyone’s pace for learning
math is slightly different. Consider the story of Andrew Wiles. Fermat's Last
Theorem was a math problem proposed in 1637 that anyone familiar with exponents
could understand, and mathematicians at the time thought would be easy to solve. Here
is one way to state the problem:

Consider the list of all numbers raised to the 2nd, 3rd, 4th, etc. powers:

 2nd power: 1, 4, 9, 16, 25, 36,...

 3rd power: 1, 8, 27, 64, 125, 216,...
 4th power: 1, 16, 81, 216, 625, 1,296,...
 And so on

It is possible to find two numbers on the “2nd power” list that add to each other, for
example 9 + 16 = 25. However, is it possible to find two numbers that add to each other
in any other list?

British mathematician Andrew Wiles was fascinated by the problem as a child, and as
an adult, was determined to solve it. He labored over it for six years until rocking the
mathematical world with a solution that was over three centuries in the making.
Learning math is most definitely not a race to the finish line.

***

For more resources to support helping your children learn while they’re away from
school, see  HMH’s At-Home Learning Support.