Professional Documents
Culture Documents
Ravishing or Ravaged - Women's Relationships With Women in The Context of Aging and Western Beauty Culture
Ravishing or Ravaged - Women's Relationships With Women in The Context of Aging and Western Beauty Culture
CAROL A. GOSSELINK
DEBORAH L. COX
Missouri State University, Springfield
SARISSA J. MCCLURE
Hernando-Pasco Hospice, Hudson, Florida
MARY L. G. DE JONG
Penn State University, Altoona College, Pennsylvania
ABSTRACT
307
Ó 2008, Baywood Publishing Co., Inc.
doi: 10.2190/AG.66.4.c
http://baywood.com
308 / GOSSELINK ET AL.
For centuries, and from infancy into old age (Campbell, 2005; Langlois et al.,
2000; Ramsey, Langlois, Hoss, Rubenstein, & Griffin, 2004; Ritter, Casey, &
Langlois, 1991; Samuels, Butterworth, Roberts, Graupner, & Hole, 1994), our
species’ preference for aesthetically appealing human bodies and the social desir-
ability of being deemed attractive have compelled individuals, especially women,
to strive for personal beauty (Adamson & Doud-Galli, 2004). As a result, women’s
gender identity, sexual desirability, mate selection options, social status, body
image satisfaction, self-esteem, and in fact their perceived value are predicated
upon how closely they resemble current sociocultural standards of beauty (Barash,
2006; Dittmar & Howard, 2004; Geary, Vigil, & Byrd-Craven, 2004; Jeffreys,
2005; Langlois et al., 2000; Monro & Huon, 2005; Reischer & Koo, 2004; Singh,
2004; Stokes & Frederick-Recascino, 2003; Tiggemann & McGill, 2004). Small
wonder, then, that the normative demand to be beautiful influences all aspects of
women’s lives, including their interactions with others (Barash, 2006; Dittmar &
Howard, 2004; Mclaren, Kuh, Hardy & Gauvin, 2004; Tiggemann & Lewis,
2004). However, we know little about women’s social negotiation of the beauty
contract in relationship to other women throughout the life course. In this study we
explored female relationships with each other against the intricate tapestry of the
U. S. beauty culture (Cox et al., 2005), with particular emphasis on how these rela-
tionships evolve during the visible process of aging.
old age, meaning that to maintain beauty, one must appear to be young. Lewis and
Cachelin (2001) observed that older women displayed body dissatisfaction levels
comparable to middle-aged women’s; both groups selected thin figures as repre-
senting attractiveness ideals. Oberg and Tornstam (2001) and Wilcox (1997) con-
curred that youthfulness, fitness, and other physical-appearance characteristics
remained important dimensions of self even into old age.
Because “looking ‘old’ is viewed more harshly for women” (Hatch, 2005, p. 19)
than for men, they are more susceptible than their male counterparts to beauty cul-
ture’s pressure to stay young. Yet biological maturity ultimately exacts its toll.
Being viewed as unattractive imperils older women’s psychological, emotional,
and interpersonal health, positioned as they are in a social milieu that requires
women to look young regardless of age (Jeffreys, 2005). Saucier (2004), Barash
(2006), and Bartky (1990), among others, argued that Western culture’s conflation
of beauty with youth puts older women at risk for low self-esteem, depression,
and anxiety.
Others have reported similar but nuanced results. Aging women in Halliwell
and Dittmar’s study (2003) asserted that if they maintained a youthful appearance,
they would be valued and considered attractive. Thus, they unanimously regarded
aging negatively because it reduced their beauty, status, and power. At the same
time, some of these women professed to welcome fewer societal demands for
attractiveness with age; as they experienced reduced pressure, the women’s
unhappiness with their appearance also declined. Correspondingly, Hurd (2000)
suggested that as older women receive indications that they are no longer
beautiful, they gradually learn to accept the natural aging process. Indeed, John-
ston, Reilly, and Kremer (2004) reported that although body dissatisfaction
occurred across the lifespan, some of their study participants felt less negative
about their bodies as they aged, even though they remained vigilant about trying to
look good. Johnston et al. (2004) concluded that women’s unique backgrounds
and experiences would influence their individualized reactions to their changing
appearance with advancing age.
nor can we begin to grasp the complex emotional impact aging exerts on women’s
social-relational lives.
METHODS
Our content and process analysis methods followed Clinchy’s (2003, p. 41)
description of “self as instrument,” whereby researchers insert their own experi-
ences to understand the stories and statements of participants. We also employed
Chase’s (2003) suggestions for categorizing themes within and across group
session transcripts. First, we noted our assumptions about beauty, aging, women’s
responses to the beauty culture, and their relationships with other women. Next,
we read transcripts and listened to focus group tapes, during which we generated
initial coding themes within interviews to mark transcripts during second and third
readings. When we re-assembled, we developed broader categories of ideas pres-
ent both within and across interviews and matched coded sections of the tran-
scripts to these broader categories. Finally, we compared categories of ideas from
group transcripts with previously-generated assumptions about women’s experi-
ences of the beauty culture. We also questioned our interpretations of participants’
stories and statements. This provoked further discussion about how contextual
issues operate in the beauty culture and how our biases fed into interpretations of
participants’ stories and statements. During final discussions, we referred to our
group diary, which contained our emotional and interpersonal processes through-
out the steps of this analysis.
Although the study’s purpose was to investigate older women’s experiences, we
included aging themes pertinent to young and midlife women as well. This
decision opened the analysis to relational issues that arise as women experience
aging from the early-middle to late-life years.
Throughout, we relied on the question, “Does this information further our
understanding of women’s relationships with women as they are influenced by
beauty culture and aging?” This query anchored the designation of final categories
derived from participants’ narrative themes.
Emanating from social constructionist and feminist research paradigms, the
narrative approach views researchers and participants as co-constructors of reality.
Accordingly, we embraced an inductive stance that includes both participants’ and
researchers’ perspectives and voices. This orientation equalizes status, empower-
ing all rather than elevating researchers and diminishing participants. Such a
research strategy holds a “connected collaboration . . . to be essential in narrative
research” since, “when the self is the instrument of understanding, two or more
selves are more likely than one” to provide “a clue to the meaning of a narrative
passage” (Clinchy, 2003, p. 43). This provided fuller comprehension of partici-
pants’ lived experiences.
RESULTS
Content Themes
The older women in Group I reported moderating their emphasis on and atten-
tion to appearance with age. However, the shift did not mean that looks were no
longer considered important. The women explained that although beauty stand-
ards may change with age, looking attractive still mattered. Gina (age 91) stated
that she dressed up before being seen in public: “You don’t want to come down in
your rags. You want to look your best with what you have.”
Group I participants noted they had changed their feelings about beauty
standards. These elder Midwestern women enjoyed being less driven by beauty
culture mandates, as, with age, they felt less pressured. They were relieved to
be free to make choices about beauty based on staying true to themselves—not
about fitting in, competing for attention, being stylish, and slavishly following
beauty standards. Unlike the considerably younger women in Group II who
said they needed to adhere to “fashion before comfort,” Group I women verbalized
314 / GOSSELINK ET AL.
that although appearance is still important, comfort trumps fashion. Rebecca (age
77) commented:
When you get to be our age you don’t worry quite as much about things as you
do when you were younger, or at least I don’t. Worrying about how you look
and . . . [about] clothes. . . . I think it becomes a little easier when you get
[older, but you] always want to look nice.
Gina (age 91) remarked, “You try and look as young as you can. . . . I don’t mean
kiddish like, but you try and keep yourself looking like—your skin should look
lived in.” Patricia (age 73) claimed, “Now we just dress to keep warm,” while
Margaret (age 75) stated that with increasing age, “hygiene is number one.”
All four focus groups members granted that along with aging came such nega-
tives as loss of youthful appearance, diminishment of self-esteem, and challenges
to relationships with other women. Group II participants both deprecated and
expressed pity for women who cannot accept the aging process. These group
members also voiced their conviction that women who have lost their youthful
beauty should withdraw from social view, as illustrated in this conversation:
Jane (age 66): I was thinking about Elizabeth Taylor. When I was growing up,
she was just gorgeous when she was young and she’s gotten just atrocious
looking. [Group: Didn’t age gracefully.] And now she just looks like a
caricature. I saw an interview with her and all her jewels and everything. It’s
sad when someone who was so beautiful. . . .
[It is sad. It’s sad, group members chime in.]
Laura (age 38): Someone needs to take her aside and go, “Honey!” [Loud
group laughter]
Jackie (age 53): She needed to stay hidden after about 15 years ago.
Mindy (age 43): I would, first of all [say to Taylor], “You have to tone it
down.” I’m not one to mince words, so to speak, so I probably would say,
“You look like a caricature of yourself and you need to—come on, you’re not
15, you’re not 20 anymore. Quit with all the facelifts and the caking on the
makeup. You’re not fooling anybody. Knock it off.”
Women reported hoping to mature such that they could accept physical signs of
age or intervene to delay biological aging with cosmetic alterations. Several
women suggested that in either case, other women would criticize them for trying
too hard or not hard enough. They shared the view that women who nearly attain
beauty culture ideals experience more difficulty accepting the physical signs of
aging. As demonstrated by the women’s repudiation of Taylor, their words
revealed negative feelings about others trying to look much younger than they are.
RAVISHING OR RAVAGED / 315
At the same time, women from various groups worried about what might hap-
pen to them as they aged. Several alluded to a fear of aging and being scrutinized if
they did not attend to their looks by undergoing cosmetic surgery or dyeing their
hair, but also being judged if they did engage in such behaviors. A conversation
from Group III captures this Hobson’s choice:
Renee (age 53): What do you suppose happens to women who are just into
their looks, into their looks, into their looks? Worried, worried, when they get
older? And they start getting wrinkles. They start sagging and stuff.
Renee: No, they get their surgeries and they get their lifts.
Renee: No. I mean women in general when their boobs are hanging and . . .
Bonnie (age 32): Do you mean when Botox doesn’t work any more? They
freak out and can’t remember their names . . .
Abbie (age 51): Well, wait a second. Who are these women who are so
concerned about a wrinkle? Okay, are they rich women? Or are they average
women like us?
Despite the women’s desire to reach a comfortable maturity when appearance
would no longer be a priority, their comments suggested that growing older
gracefully within the beauty culture does not occur easily. Rebecca’s (age 53)
words give voice to their frustrations at trying to achieve harmony with the aging
process while still attending to appearance:
It’s complicated. . . . Some of it is the acceptance. . . . We’re human beings.
This is what happens to our bodies, I mean, we don’t get younger. Our muscle
tone and our brain cells, they don’t regenerate. . . . That’s sort of the reality and
facing the truth. . . . We weren’t meant to look 50 when we’re 100. That’s all
false. That’s science and it’s money and it’s perpetuating an image and we’re
caught in a bind because we buy into it too. And we have to own it. We have to
say, “Yeah, I do like nice things and I do want to look younger,” and it’s just
how far [you go] and how much [you spend]. . . . It’s a risk.
The oldest women in the study acknowledged that, eventually, makeup alone
could not conceal the ravages of time, and that the best course was to accept their
looks. In Group I, Sophie (82) commented, “I think a lot of older women do
usually want to put on more make up than they need. As far as I am concerned, the
older you get I think the less you really should wear.” Gina (91) concurred, “You
look better without a lot of makeup, anyway. A lot of makeup makes you look
false.” She later added, “I can remember a doctor telling me, ‘Your face should
look lived in.’ I think that is a pretty good remark. It should look lived in. It
shouldn’t look made up.”
316 / GOSSELINK ET AL.
Some midlife women revealed dismay at their bodies’ aging and a sense of
futility in waging the beauty battle, a sentiment articulated by Group III member,
Abbie (age 51):
I’ve never worked out in my life. Well, all of a sudden [a few years ago]
gravity hit. I want to move to the moon! But have I worked out? No. Have I
done anything about it? No. It’s sad to say this, but all of a sudden it’s like one
day . . . you start to not give a shit any more. You start ignoring the Barbie dolls
in the elevator.
Some participants hoped that, with age, their relationships with women would
improve:
Carrie (age 59, Group II): I’m thinking when I walk into a room, I am not
attracted to a woman who is excessively beautiful. Maybe I’m intimidated.
Maybe I think she focuses on her beauty too much, but whatever the reason is,
I’m not attracted to that woman. I’m not attracted to the horrendously ugly
person either when I walk into a room. I’m not going to seek out this person. I
have a friend who I have avoided for years because she’s incredibly
ugly. . . she doesn’t try to do anything different. She’s just ugly. But inside,
she’s wonderful, and fortunately, I’m getting old enough that I can look
beyond that.
Others in Group II provided narratives of their desire to be valued for their inner
beauty, not for their appearance as they age. Cathryn (age 58) implored:
I want to be accepted for who I am. Me. Not for my looks. That’s why I dress
to fit in, so that it’s not my looks that stand out, but it’s me. And as I get older,
that’s what I am looking at in other people too.
Some younger participants believed that aging allows women to invest time and
energy in other dimensions of themselves, beyond just looking good, to reach a
more balanced inner and outer beauty. Although women desired to be accepted as
a whole package rather than just for physical attributes when they aged, they
admitted that they always consider how they look in social situations. Maureen
(34, Group IV) expressed this ambivalence as she shared her feelings when her
boyfriend complimented her looks: “Well, he does mean it, but—there are times I
value it now and [times] I think I have evolved into a different person.”
Almost all the women intimated that they apply inflexible beauty standards both
to themselves and to other women, and know other women are judging them by the
same unforgiving rules. Many decried the superficiality of gauging a woman’s
value by her appearance and especially wished others would not judge them on
their looks alone. Concurrently, however, they criticized women who seemed
excessively confident in their appearance, too competitive, or too preoccupied
with looking attractive.
Participants initially denied evaluating other women on their beauty. Neverthe-
less, later on, many of these same women labeled very pretty others as “self-
absorbed” people who pity less advantaged women. In Group II, Julie (age 38)
318 / GOSSELINK ET AL.
started her story suggesting it was other women who are judgmental, but soon
divulged that she swiftly assesses them as well:
You can feel it almost immediately when I meet someone. I think, “Hmm,
she’s [sic] checked out my bag and my shoes almost before anything else.” I
can tell . . . just based upon her appearance, as to who I’m going to get along
with, and I make a snap judgment right away.
She came in and she was—she looked like a movie star. She was just gor-
geous. She looked like she was 15 years old with her long, blonde cascading
hair. And I thought, “She doesn’t know what she is doing! I’m dying!”
Someone who’s extremely attractive, I think she got in [medical school] on
her looks. That’s terrible. She’s very smart and very good, but as they were
putting me under, I thought, “Oh no!”
DISCUSSION
In this narrative focus group study, we examined women’s experiences of aging
and their relationships with other women in a Western beauty culture that obliges
women to compete with other females to be crowned thinnest, youngest, and
fairest of all. Using the concept of saturation, four focus groups from geo-
graphically distinct regions in the U.S. were selected for analysis. We identified
six content themes as articulated collectively in four focus groups by 26 women,
ages 17 to 91, who conversed for two hours about beauty, aging, and women-
to-women relationships across the life course. We presented four themes herein.
The first theme that emerged was the extent to which beauty is prioritized
throughout the life course, albeit with age-related adjustments. Group I, comprised
solely of older participants, expressed relief at no longer being held to strict
standards. These older women’s statements confirmed several researchers’ reports
that in old age, many women feel they have been excused from rigid adherence to
beauty norms (Halliwell & Dittmar, 2003; Hurd, 2000; Johnston et al., 2004;
Tiggemann & McGill, 2004). Yet all acknowledged that they still wanted to look
attractive. In a self-disparaging comment, 91-year-old Gina said, “You want to
look your best with what you have [emphasis added],” evidencing beauty culture’s
insidious influence on Gina’s self-appraisal. Later, Gina vocalized her view that
“you try and look as young as you can.” Although she then haltingly tried to
rephrase her statement in a more positive light, her words revealed Gina’s
knowledge that in Western culture, looking youthful is an essential criterion for
being beautiful. Gina’s remark is consistent with findings suggesting that
women’s desire to be considered sexually appealing and attractive remains a goal
RAVISHING OR RAVAGED / 319
well into later life (Halliwell & Dittmar, 2003; Johnston et al., 2004; Lewis &
Cachelin, 2001; Oberg & Tornstam, 2001; Perlini et al., 1999; Wilcox, 1997).
One of the most telling vignettes that illustrates content theme two, negativity
about aging, appearance, and relationships with other women, was the session in
which Elizabeth Taylor was ridiculed. Here, women exhibited their alliance with
beauty culture norms. Even while feigning pity for Taylor, participants opined that
she looked “atrocious,” “like a caricature,” and that “she needed to stay hidden
after about 15 years ago.” Numerous studies (see Calasanti & Slevin, 2001) have
confirmed that with age, women are expected to disappear from view since society
abhors beholding women whose age renders them unbeautiful. Even as women
groomed by the competitive beauty culture derided Taylor1 they concomitantly
expressed personal fears about growing old. Rebecca (age 53) realized she was
“caught in a bind” between wanting to look youthful and yet seeing every day the
visible physical effects of aging. Discussions further revealed a duality wherein
women described the horrors aging held for other women (“They start sagging and
stuff”), but to some extent admitting they themselves would become desperate
“when Botox doesn’t work any more.” The group wanted to disparage women
for being preoccupied with staving off the visible signs of aging, but as middle-
aged Abbie clarified, those others might be “average women like us.” It thus
appeared that the oldest (Group I) women were somewhat more resigned to
looking older than were middle-aged women in the other groups. Sophie (age 82)
and others agreed that with age, women should wear less makeup and strive for a
face that looks “lived in.” A fear-of-aging theme was spelled out by 59-year-old
Carrie, who eschews a relationship with any “excessively beautiful” woman
because she “focuses too much on her beauty,” yet admits avoiding an “ugly”
acquaintance since “she doesn’t even try” to be more attractive. Dialogue in our
study vividly exemplified the tightrope on which women teeter between being
viewed as obsessing about or disregarding beauty culture standards. More dis-
turbing still is the women’s articulation of how other women’s beauty, or lack
thereof, determines whether or not a relationship will be pursued. Epitomizing
their double-bind, women wanted to be viewed as beautiful themselves, yet
preferred relationships with women whose average looks would pose no threat.
This theme area also encapsulated women’s hopes that once they age and can no
longer compete, they will “look beyond” superficial external characteristics. This
desire to evolve into a “different person” echoes findings of greater acceptance of
1
Coincidentally, a recent news article captured women’s awareness of women’s negativity toward
one another as they age through an interview with Ms. Taylor:
When asked by fashion designer Michael Kors . . . whether she dreses for men, women, or herself . . .
Taylor [replied]: “Men first. Myself. Then other women, ‘cause you can’t please women. They are
horribly critical of each other. And more so if you’re famous. Meow (Altoona Mirror, 11 July 2006,
p. D3).
320 / GOSSELINK ET AL.
self and others with age (Halliwell & Dittmar, 2003; Hurd, 2000; Tiggemann &
McGill, 2004).
A third content theme discovered during analysis concerned the generational
divide that beauty culture widens. Here, middle-aged women spoke aggressively
about 20-year-olds who, in their view, dressed provocatively, exposed too much
bosom, and vied for scarce husbands and boyfriends. Initial admiration for young
women who appeared “secure in their personal appearance” soon gave way to
envy, resentment, and hatred. Although focus group participants liked to believe
they were “investing in other parts” of themselves to compensate for losing their
youth, they could not divorce themselves entirely from feeling that “twinge of
envy,” if not outright anger, when their male companions eyeballed younger
women. Demonstrating their rancor, throughout focus group discussions of their
adversaries, women used such words as “tits” and “boobs” to describe younger
women’s breasts, which in male-hegemonic Western culture are sexually-charged
and often degrading terms. Since competition for men and keeping them by main-
taining beauty culture standards are timeless, lifelong goals for many women,
Group I participants who came of age during the 1940s disclosed how they pleased
their husbands. Maintaining their long hair, one of the female features men admire,
and wearing makeup “to look good” were ways in which the older women con-
formed with their husbands’ desires, presumably to ward off competition. These
markers of desirability have been confirmed in various studies, particularly those
exploring the evolutionary basis of sexual attractiveness (e.g., Geary et al., 2004).
Our study’s finding that sexual attractiveness remains important to women
throughout the life course is supported by other researchers (Halliwell & Dittmar,
2003; Johnston et al., 2004; Lewis & Cachelin, 2001; Oberg & Tornstam, 2001;
Perlini et al., 1999; Stokes & Frederick-Recascino, 2003; Wilcox, 1997). The
consequence of division between the generations is that women perpetually view
those younger than themselves as contenders for men’s sexual favors and affec-
tion and relate to those older as dreaded harbingers of what lies ahead. Relation-
ships between women of different ages cannot flourish in an environment
where even 34-year-old women believe younger women are trying to steal their
male companions.
A fourth and final content theme was women’s judgment of themselves and
others irrespective of age. These beauty-culture-driven attitudes harm women’s
relationships in two ways. First, women who judge themselves lacking are likely
to suffer from low self-esteem, depression, and self-loathing (Artz, 1997; Cattarin,
Thompson, Thomas, & Williams, 2000); people who hate themselves rarely are
emotionally available and developmentally advanced enough to engage in
mutuality, sharing, and suspension of judgment—cornerstones of empathically-
connected friendships (Walker & Rosen, 2004). Second, judgment of other
women as either too pretty or not pretty enough, as treacherous, and as opponents
precludes establishment of woman-to-woman interconnectedness. Women
RAVISHING OR RAVAGED / 321
counter the discomfort of being judged by another female (“She’s [sic] checked
out my bag and my shoes almost before anything else”) by preemptively making
“snap judgments” about the other. Not surprisingly, this judgment based on beauty
bleeds into other arenas, for example, career success, as illustrated by Lorna’s
assumption that a “gorgeous” oral surgeon must be incompetent, having been
accepted into medical school solely on looks. Women in the focus groups
manifested a serious obstacle to forming and maintaining female relationships:
how can women really trust or get close to others who are judged and judging on
the basis of beauty culture competition?
IMPLICATIONS
The tragedy of women’s mutual animus and competition combined with self-
hatred in Western beauty culture is that relationships between women are
jeopardized and undermined throughout the life course. In each of the four content
themes explicated in this research, the attitudes and behaviors of women living in a
youth-and-beauty-worshipping society sentence them to emotionally-arrested
relational development. Woman-to-woman relationships are critical throughout
the lifespan, having been linked with life satisfaction, longevity, happiness,
improved physical and mental health, emotional development, meaning in life,
and creativity (Farrell, 2001; Hedelin & Jonsson, 2003; Jordan, 1997; Jordan,
Kaplan, Miller, Stiver, & Surrey, 1991; O’Connor, 1992; Rennemark & Hagberg,
1999; Siebert, Mutran, & Reitzers, 1999). Beauty-culture-impaired female
relationships are particularly detrimental to women as they grow older because
friendships and social support are critical in old age (Adams, Blieszner, & De
Vries, 2000; Connidis, 2001; Calasanti & Slevin, 2001; Fiori et a1., 2006; Jopp &
Rott, 2006; Schaie & Willis, 1996).
Despite numerous studies clarifying the damage that Western beautyism does to
young women (e.g., Artz, 1997; Frost, 2003), we submit that beauty culture’s
emphasis on youth and slimness is most problematic for aging women. At some
point, the aging process can no longer be camouflaged by anti-aging miracle
formulas, let alone Botox, dermabrasion, collagen injections, breast lifts, lip aug-
mentation, eyelid rejuvenation, or laser skin resurfacing. In addition, because
weight gain correlates with ever-decreasing metabolism rates with age (Williams
& Wood, 2006), unless they sustain eternal dieting vigilance, maturing women
will become heavier than is socioculturally desirable.
Our findings suggest that the widening gap between beauty culture norms and
women’s physical reality is, paradoxically, more problematic for middle-aged
women than for those in their 70s, 80s, and 90s. We propose several reasons why
the oldest women (Group I) expressed fewer beauty culture issues than did middle-
aged women in the other three focus groups. First, it is possible that we were
detecting regional differences. All the women age 70 and older were from the
322 / GOSSELINK ET AL.
Midwest. The other three groups convened in the Southwest, Northwest, and
Northeast regions of the U.S. Prior research (Plaut, Markus, & Lachman, 2002)
has noted cultural differences by region, and perhaps the “salt of the earth” older
women in mid-America were somewhat insulated from or impervious to the larger
beauty culture forces that encompass most Western societies. Second, basic cohort
differences may obtain for a variety of reasons, including the fact that the oldest
women in our study lived through such experiences as the Great Depression and
World War II when basic survival was predicated on hard work and perseverance,
rather than attractiveness; compare this with the boomer era of prosperity and
the expansion of a capitalist consumer culture, wherein other measures of status,
including beauty, gained ascendancy (Dychtwald, 1999). Third, the malignant
impact of media-disseminated beauty ideals cannot be discounted. The oldest
women’s formative years were not influenced by as wide an array of media.
Boomer women are the first generation to have experienced lifelong beauty-
culture media imaging. Just as other researchers have found (Bazzini, McIntosh,
Smith, Cook, & Harris, 1997; Hausenblas, Janelle, & Gardner, 2004; Saucier,
2004), we assert that constant exposure to idealized beauty standards through a
barrage of media messages has shaped boomer women’s fear of looking and
becoming old. A fourth reason we found more age-related distress among middle-
aged women than the oldest women is ageism in society. Through everyday
interactions and experiences, older women have learned that they are deemed so
ugly, sexless, and repulsive that they have become invisible. Other than “keeping
up appearances” for each other and their mates, older women may well have
withdrawn from the vicious beauty competition, knowing they cannot win, and
thus should focus their energies elsewhere. Conversely, middle-aged women
perceive the beauty battle as winnable if only they try hard enough. The women in
our focus groups fit into what Jones (2004, p. 527) described as “stretched middle
age,” wherein “care of the body is increasingly interwoven with social respon-
sibility,” which obligates women to actively engage in daily beauty regimens. As
Jones noted:
boomer generation and their successors, visible signs of aging will occur in a
media-saturated, youth-and-thinness-valorizing culture that influences women’s
entire lives. We therefore advocate more extensive and intensive research into
aging women’s relationships with women of all ages in the context of the beauty
culture. Only by better understanding the relational mechanisms by which women
participate in beauty culture can they be counteracted, giving rise to a more
hospitable climate in which women can rely on relationships with each other
throughout the life course.
We assert that pervasive beauty culture norms and rampant ageism subject
women of all ages to escalating, but seldom acknowledged, losses, including the
loss of power and status with advancing maturity. Younger, thinner, more
beautiful women temporarily wrest the prize from their elders, but they, too, are
subject to the ravages of the inexorable biological clock. As women of all ages
mature, it is apparent that generational divisions in their relationships rob them of
ties between women as few as five to ten years apart in age. The code of silence
surrounding beauty culture issues powerfully estranges women who have tacitly
allowed hierarchical social values to dictate their status according to age and
appearance. If women openly discussed the double binds they face as they mature,
their fears of becoming and appearing old, and their grief as culturally-defined
attractiveness fades, perhaps the generational divide that fractures young, middle-
aged, and mature women’s relationships would lose its destructive power.
REFERENCES
Adams, R. G., Blieszner, R., & De Vries, B. (2000). Definitions of friendship in the third
age: Age, gender, and study location effects. Journal of Aging Studies, 14(1), 117-128.
Adamson, P., & Doud-Galli, S. (2004). Modern concepts of beauty. Plastic Surgical
Nursing, 24(1), 32-36.
Artz, S. (1997). On becoming an object. Journal of Child and Youth Care, 22(2), 17-37.
Barash, S. (2006). Tripping the prom queen. New York: St. Martin’s Press.
Bartky, S. (1990). Femininity and domination. Studies in the phenomenology of oppression.
New York: Routledge.
Bazzini, D. G., McIntosh, W. D., Smith, S. M., Cook, S., & Harris, C. (1997). The aging
woman in popular film: Underrepresented, unattractive, unfriendly, and unintelligent.
Sex Roles, 36(7/8), 531-543.
Behnke, C., Cowan, G., DeLaMoreaux, J., & Neighbors, C. (1998). Women’s hostility
toward women. Psychology of Women Quarterly, 22, 267-284.
Bylsma, W. H., & Major, B. (1994) Social comparison and contentment. Psychology of
Women Quarterly, 18(2), 241-250.
Calasanti, T., & Slevin, K. (2001). Gender, social inequalities, and aging. Walnut Creek,
CA: Alta Mira Press.
Calasanti, T., Slevin, K., & King, N. (2006). Ageism and feminism: From “et cetera” to
center. NWSA Journal, 18(1), 13 pp.
324 / GOSSELINK ET AL.
Stokes, R., & Frederick-Recascino, C. (2003). Women’s perceived body image: Relations
with personal happiness. Journal of Women and Aging, 15(1), 17-29.
Strauss, A., & Corbin, J. (1998). Basics of qualitative research (2nd ed.). Thousand Oaks,
CA: Sage Publications.
Tiggemann, M., & Lewis, C. (2004). Attitudes toward women’s body hair: Relationship
with disgust sensitivity. Psychology of Women Quarterly, 28, 381-387.
Tiggemann, M., & McGill, B. (2004). The role of social comparison in the effect of maga-
zine advertisements on women’s mood and body dissatisfaction. Journal of Social and
Clinical Psychology, 23(1), 23-44.
Walker, M., & Rosen, W. (Eds.). (2004). How connections heal: Stories from relational-
cultural therapy. New York: Guilford.
Wilcox, S. (1997). Age and gender in relation to body attitudes: Is there a double standard of
aging? Psychology of Women Quarterly, 21, 549-565.
Williams, P., & Wood, P. (2006). The effects of changing exercise levels on weight and
age-related weight gain. International Journal of Obesity, 30, 543-551.