Pipsy: Clown of the Year!

Script

The scene opens with some chilled music as we see a quick montage of
shots of Pipsy getting ready. She misses her alarm a few times, brushes
her teeth half heartedly, puts on clown makeup in a cracked mirror, puts
in her toast and then goes to drink coffee in front of the tv. The tv turns
on and we hear an advert. It’s a jarring contrast to the pace of the last
scene.

Advertiser: HEY YOU! YES, YOU! DO YOU HAVE A KNACK FOR

PHYSICAL COMEDY? PARTIAL TO WHITE FACE PAINT? NO OTHER
CHOICE LEFT FOR A CAREER PATH? THEN YOU MIGHT HAVE A
CHANCE TO WIN CLOWN OF THE YEAR!! ENTRIES HAVE BEEN
POSTPONED DUE TO THE NEW LOCKDOWN SO THERE’S STILL
TIME TO CLAIM YOUR PLACE IN THE CLOWNING INDUSTRY! AND
WHY NOT? IT’S NOT LIKE YOU GOT ANYTHING BETTER TO DO!
GO ON, TAKE A CHANCE! WHY WOULDN’T YOU WIN? YOU’RE
SMART, TALENTED AND PRETTY FUNNY! NO IT’S TRUE! I’M
SERIOUS. SO WHAT ARE YOU STILL DOING SAT THERE? APPLY
NOW TO CLOWN OF THE YEAR.COM TO GET YOUR CHANCE IN
THE SPOTLIGHT AND THE ATTENTION YOU NEVER GOT FROM
YOUR PARENTS. JUST FOLLOW THE EASY STEPS ON OUR
WEBSITE TO BECOMING THE GREATEST CLOWN ACT YET!

Advertiser: Step 1: Learn from the best. In order to become the master,
you must first be the student. Be sure to research as many clowns as
possible!

Step 2: Find your act. It’s not enough just being funny- master a skill
that’ll add that artistic flare!

Step 3: Have an audience. How are you supposed to make people laugh
if there are no people!
And finally, Step 4: Perform! Be the clown you were always destined to
be! Or you know, just another failed actor without a real career.

Pipsy is completely transfixed by the advert. She reacts to each line in a

physical manner. The advert ends and she’s whisked off into a day
dream of sound effects, applause, money sounds etc. until she hears
the smoke detector going off in the background.

Step 1: Learn from the best

The next scene we see her holding a plate of burnt toast and a mug and
attempting to sit down while holding them both. Will use an improvised
“creating and solving problems” routine here. She finally manages to sit
down and she watches a load of clown videos, ranging from classic
clowning to Mr Bean to one of Borris’s lockdown speeches to a video of
Pennywise which she makes a disapproving face at.

Step 2: Find your act

We see Pipsy try juggling, tap dance, Opera, attempt a magic mike
reenactment, play harmonica really badly, bad puppet show. This is
done through a series of the same framed shot but with different sounds
and costumes. Use audience boos? After no success, she sits down
miserably, taking a bite of her still unfinished burnt toast. It gives her an
idea.

Step 3: Have an audience

Pipsy opens her door or window and a series of coughs, sirens, “the end
is nigh”, covid-rules etc. She closes it again and the sounds abruptly
stop. The next shot is of her performing her clown act with canned
sitcom laughter. When she finishes it turns to her audience which are a
bunch of soft toys. She frowns and goes searching for an audience,
even pulling the camera out of the cameraman (Joel)’s hands and
attempting to sit him down but he keeps walking back behind the
camera so she gives up. She searches around, the sitcom laughter
continuing even at inappropriate times. She goes to kick a teddy out the
window and we hear scream and the laughter abruptly stop. She seems
at a loss, droopily walking around, getting more and more disheartened
as she can find any audience. (Possible clown in rain shot). We switch
to a webcam camera as she sighs and sits down in front of the webcam,
before looking up into it. Puzzled she plays around a bit with the
webcam, trying to reach the audience.

Step 4: Perform!
She performs her act again in front of the webcam, this time with real
laughter. Satisfied and pleased with herself, she enters into the
competition and goes to bed happily, cuddling a pillow with Ronald
McDonald’s face on it. A few months later, we see a much more rushed
version of the opening sequence as Pipsy gets ready and sits down in
front of the tv. The clown of the year is announced; Donald Trump. As
it’s announced she goes to take a bite out of yet another burnt toast,
spits it out and begins to say “fuc-” just before the credits roll.

Music options:
Losing You- Brenda Lee
Wicked Fascinations
Kevin Mcleod
Be my baby
Tonight’s the Night- Bobby Helms

Notes: Make umbrella it’s own character, think of all the wrong ways to solves problems.
Always play for laughs in everything,