Somebody To Love

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/16962474.

Rating: Explicit
Archive Warning: Choose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Category: F/M, M/M
Fandom: | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Relationship: Jeon Jungkook/Kim Taehyung | V, Jeon Jungkook/Original Female
Character(s), Kim Taehyung | V/Original Female Character(s)
Character: Jeon Jungkook, Kim Taehyung | V, Park Jimin (BTS)
Additional Tags: Angst, Slow Burn, Alternate Universe - 1950s, Homophobia, Cheating,
Lawyer Kim Taehyung | V, Law Student Jeon Jungkook, Anal Sex,
Period-Typical Sexism, Historical Inaccuracy, Feminization, Blow Jobs,
Cocky Kim Taehyung | V, Internalized Homophobia, Dom/sub
Undertones, Dysfunctional Relationships, Emotional/Psychological
Abuse, Heavy Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Manipulation,
Pining, Desperation, Anxiety Attacks, Anxiety, Gender Identity, Drag
Queens, Coming Out
Stats: Published: 2018-12-12 Completed: 2019-06-27 Chapters: 29/29 Words:
125272

Somebody To Love
by LOVERVMINS (orphan_account)

Summary

Falling in love with another man during the 1950s was never something Taehyung or
Jeongguk envisioned. Especially not when they were both married and had beautiful wives.

Or, The story of two lovers who were never meant for each other, but destiny found its way
anyway.

Notes

this book is also on wattpad @ larryvgl :)

 Chapter 1

1958
London

Falling in love was mythic.

Over exaggerated, romanticized, far-fetched, idealistic. Falling in love was anything but realistic. It
was fairytales he read and simplified shortened stories he heard as a child. It was the glass wall
everyone puts up in front of their ever-lasting relationship to make it perfect.

Falling in love was anything but perfect.

At least to Jeongguk, anyway.

He'd grown up around a family falling apart like crumbles of a cheaply painted wall. His mother
despised her husband, who loathed his wife. They'd been together for years and years. Yet,
unhappy. Unsatisfied. Un-perfect. Why were they still together? Jeongguk would never know, for
he'd never ask. He'd just understood simply; Love never lasts.

"Oh he's quiet," Jeongguk heard. "Doesn't talk much. Reads a lot. He's at work a lot, rarely ever at
home."

Jeongguk scoffed to himself, standing by the doorway. What was so reprehensible about being
quiet? He's heard it since he was a child; you talk too little, open your mouth a bit more, stop being
such a bore. Plus, reading is the one escape he has from everything that surrounds him. And his
work... his work keeps him busy. He just wants to be kept busy. From- from everything around
him. His own self, perhaps.
"I think it's rather charming, really! Never curses, always polite. Plus, he's so intelligent. From all
those books he reads. Works at a law firm. The one by the downtown, yeah." Jeongguk heard
further, and that made his shoulders relax a little. So he's not... the worst.

Jeongguk was stood by the entrance of the house he was in. Whose house, he's unsure. In fact, for
the past few weeks, Jeongguk had been rather unsure. Moved to London a month ago. Barely
settled into a new home, and now he'd been dragged into their neighbor's house. Loud chatter came
from the living room, while Jeongguk looked around- taking in the modern aesthetic of the home.
It was rather large, which made Jeongguk wonder about the number of people residing there.

The rain was pouring heavily outside. London, of course. It was night time, around 8 pm. Jeongguk
saw a vinyl sitting on a little brown end table pressed against the corner of the wall, jutting out with
its wooden refinery. Jeongguk placed his fingertips gently against the onyx disk sitting silently on
the spinner, and then-

"It's Little Richard," A voice came, deep, and Jeongguk turned around in an instant, a chill running
down his spine which startled him. "Quite impressive, innit?" Continued; referring to the vinyl on
the record player.

Jeongguk's eyes were big for a few seconds, and it's like he forgot how to make speech with the
vocal cords in his mouth. Talk. Jeongguk forgot how to talk. The man stood in front of him was
tall. Presumably not much taller than Jeongguk, but seemed a lot bigger. Broader. Had golden hair
falling on his face, slightly long, tufts of it creeping onto the back of his neck. He wore a bright red
shirt, and pants.

"Well," The man spoke articulately, looking at Jeongguk, who still stood there, dumbfounded.
"You lost or something?"

"No, sir," Jeongguk said, and sir?? Why did he say sir?? This man couldn't be much older than he
was- Jeongguk cursed at his inner subconscious for letting that out. Dominant male authorities
always scared him for reasons unknown.

A little smirk fell onto the man's lips, and Jeongguk couldn't help but feel himself look at how the
corner of his lips turned up at the slightest and- Jeongguk felt flustered. "I-I'll just head back to the-
um- living room now." Jeongguk let out, words muddling up a bit, and the man just nodded, the
amused grin still on his face.

Jeongguk turned his back and walked into the living room, wondering who he just saw, and what
he was doing in this house. Jeongguk's questions ate up his brain, and he looked and saw two
women sitting on the couches, sat as if they were whispering something to one another.

"Jeongguk!" Rosie exclaimed, and her eyes lit up, but her voice was soft. That's what Jeongguk
liked about her. She was always so soft-spoken. "You never said a proper hello to Veronica."

Veronica, Jeongguk thought and looked at the other woman on the couch. Curls of dark black hair
fell till her chin, and she wore sharp red lipstick and some kind of glossy silver on her eyes.
Intimidating. "Nice to meet you." Jeongguk smiled.

"Nice to meet you too, Jeongguk," Veronica spoke, and Jeongguk saw her in contrast to his own
sitting beside her. Rosie, with her long blonde hair and bright green eyes, cherry pink lips, and
smaller frame. "I must apologize tremendously for not attending the wedding. I heard it was nice.
Rosie, you must show me pictures,"

"There's plenty! And I told you to come. It was such a pleasant day, wasn't it, Jeongguk?" Rosie
asked with a smile, and Jeongguk hummed, nodding. Rosie turned back to face Veronica. "You
must come with the two of us in the summer, we're going back to Yorkshire for a month to visit. I
like London, I really do... but I already miss home." Rosie said, her shoulders falling ever so
slightly. Jeongguk didn't find it in him to comfort her;

"London's nice. Do you work, Veronica?" Jeongguk asked, and Veronica looked at him.

"How nice of you. So uncommon to hear men showing interest to the work of women," She
chuckled, though her voice was dry, almost calculating, ironically flaring little interest. "I'm a
professor, I teach English," Veronica stated, and Jeongguk nodded.

It was odd to feel so intimidated by a woman only a few years elder to him, but he felt a need to.
"Jeongguk's a lawyer," Rosie said with a gleam.

Jeongguk chuckled out. "Rosie- I-I'm not a lawyer. I go to law school. I'm finishing this year, but
otherwise I'm a secretary at the Edwards Adams law firm," Jeongguk said, and Rosie let out a fond
smile.

"Well, you're going to become a lawyer. A good one, too." Rosie said, and Jeongguk found a warm
smile coming to his face.
"My husband's a lawyer," Veronica said, and Jeongguk looked at her. "Perhaps he could help you
out," That's when Rosie's eyes grew wide like saucers as if forgetting something impotently vital.

"Your husband! Where is he?" Rosie let out, and it was rather endearing, how excited she got over
everything.

Jeongguk's mind went back to the man he saw earlier in the foyer. The meeting felt false. As if it
never occurred. Maybe it didn't. Just Jeongguk's mind playing an illusion. That probably explained
the indefinite glow around him.

"Oh, right. I completely forgot," Veronica chuckled, and it was almost captivating how mannish
she came across, though looking young and prim. "Taehyung, come here, would you? He's been
awfully busy lately, some new case he's been working with. You know how hard it's been to get a
job lately, so Taehyung's having to do the work of 10."

Jeongguk sat down beside Rosie, who looked at him with a shy smile. Veronica got up for a
fraction to go get her husband, Jeongguk assumes. "I told you about her, remember? We were best
friends when we were younger, but then she moved to London."

"She seems much older than you," Jeongguk pointed out.

"Oh, she is. Wouldn't want to reveal her age, but she's not too far from 30." Rosie chirped.
Jeongguk himself was only 23, and Rosie 22. They were young, far too young to be alone in a big
city like this with barely a job to cling onto. Jeongguk was studying law in King's College while
Rosie was studying botany in a women's college. Jeongguk suggested she pursue something more
useful, like business, or even English. But Rosie shrug him off and told him that's a mans job, and
she's happy with gardening. Jeongguk didn't fight that.

The house in itself was terrifying. Jeongguk felt in the lap of luxury sitting on a plush velvet couch.
Walls were dark wood and floors lapped with garnish. The curtains were thicker, and a well-lit
fireplace lured Jeongguk's eyes to the side. It was no doubt Veronica and her husband, Taehyung,
were rather rich. Old money, Jeongguk presumed. Had to be.

"It's a nice house, isn't it?" Rosie whispered, and Jeongguk hummed, looking at her.

"Better than our tiny flat, that's for sure." Jeongguk snickered, feeling his fingers coil up into his
palm. Rosie laughed airily in agreement.
"Apologies," A voice entered, and Jeongguk lifted his head up to those vibrations that sent a
familiar tingle down his spine. "I've just been buried with work lately." A chuckle followed, and
Jeongguk felt his fingers splay out on his thigh, a nervous instinct.

It was the man with the red shirt and golden hair. Of course it was, Jeongguk thought. Why would
it not be? Oh- of course, it was the man with the golden hair. Jeongguk's mouth went dry upon
seeing him. Something about the way he smiled at Jeongguk with this unreadable gaze.

Jeongguk hated that. Hated when he couldn't tell what someone was thinking. Except for this time,
he didn't. It was rather alluring, actually.

"I'm Taehyung." He said and then smiled at Rosie. "Ah- Rosie! I remember you-"

"From your marriage ceremony! Oh, I was hoping you did! It's so nice to meet you," Rosie giggled,
and it was almost embarrassing how bubbly she was. Jeongguk felt the need to be quiet around
Taehyung. Felt the need to impress, the need to look proper.

Taehyung just smiled at Rosie, who grabbed Jeongguk's hand in a haste. "This- this is Jeongguk.
We got married this summer, actually." Rosie said excitedly, and Jeongguk looked up at the man.

Taehyung looked at Jeongguk, and they held their stare for a few seconds, and Taehyung nodded,
smiling softly. "Nice to meet you," Taehyung said, voice almost cautiously tender.

"You too," Jeongguk replied quickly, and then internally cursed himself for sounding as far off as
he did.

"Ah, you've made acquaintances. You know, it'd be really nice if the two of you bonded a little.
Rosie's moved into town now, you can guarantee I'll be going out more." Veronica laughed, and
Rosie looked at Veronica, cheeks tinting in confusion.

"I-I won't be going out much, Veronica-"

"Oh Rosie, I'm joking. They're only men, they'll understand. Now come help with dinner, let's leave
the men to chat." Veronica said, and Rosie nodded triumphantly and followed behind Veronica.
Jeongguk looked and wondered if Rosie was trying to impress Veronica too, maybe, at a
subconscious level.

"So. Heard you're going to law school,"

"I am. I'm going to graduate in a year. I work at Edwards Adams now," Jeongguk explained.
Taehyung snickered. Jeongguk was confused at that.

"Edwards Adams? That's opposite the street from my firm- what do you do?"

Jeongguk hated when men asked that. "I'm a secretary to Mr. Edwards himself," Jeongguk
mumbled, and then waited for that silent seconds of judgment and mockery before the outright
outburst of hyper-masculine confusion over why a man would take the job designed for women-

Jeongguk looked up. Taehyung wasn't laughing. He was smiling. "That's nice. Quite respectable,
considering how young you probably are," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk finally smiled a little.

"Oh- y-yes, thank you. Most find it rather amusing," Jeongguk said, finding himself playing with
his trousers.

"It's not amusing at all! You've got the hardest job there is! I mean, what is it you have to do- get
coffee 8 times, and then repeat, and repeat, and-"

Jeongguk burst out laughing, and then looked through his hooded vision to see Taehyung smiling.
"You- you wouldn't imagine the number of times Mr. Edwards has asked for coffee and I've just
given him tea, or juice, or water, or an empty cup," Jeongguk said, and this time, Taehyung burst
out laughing.

"Mr. Edwards, good old guy. Doesn't like a day over 98,"

Both laughed until Jeongguk was holding onto his sides in hopes to not start crying from how
overwhelming the jabs of laughter were. Taehyung laughed too, and then it simmered down and he
looked at Jeongguk, smiling. "Wine?"
"Yes please,"

Both got up and Jeongguk followed Taehyung to the room off to the side of the kitchen, a little
room which was cooler and full of wine bottles. That's how you know someone's rich when they
have a tiny room designated for alcohol consumption. It was a giant wooden wall with holes in it,
all holding bottles of wine.

Jeongguk chuckled. "Avid drinker?"

"Does three times a day count?" Taehyung asked, looking at a bottle precisely and then taking the
bottle out of the wooden cabinet it was snuggled in. Taehyung looked at it, and then looked at
Jeongguk. "Château Lafite?"

"You could give me anything, frankly. I don't know much about wine." Jeongguk said, and
Taehyung chuckled.

"You seem like a rum guy." Taehyung hummed to himself as they walked out of the room and
towards the table where two glasses were set.

"More of a cocktail man myself," Jeongguk said, and Taehyung scoffed.

"That's a womanly drink," Taehyung said, setting the bottle onto the table. "Let me pour you
something real men drink,"

"If the French made it, it's far from manly." Jeongguk scoffed back, and Taehyung laughed.

Taehyung poured only a little into both glasses, and then Jeongguk looked at him. Saw how his
blonde hair was thick, almost- almost a mullet if he squinted. Fascinating, Jeongguk thought and
controlled himself from carding a strand through his fingers.

"Here," Taehyung said abruptly, turning around and handing Jeongguk the glass. Jeongguk was
close to him, must've not realized how close he was, because Jeongguk reached to grab the glass,
but it knocked against Taehyung's chest, and a splash of wine splurged onto Taehyung's shirt.
"Oh!" Jeongguk said, eyes wide. That shirt must've costed more than he did. "I-I'm so sorry-"

"It's fine-"

"No, I- I didn't realize- it just- it was so sudden, a-and-"

Taehyung chuckled. "Calm down, chipper. It's no big deal, it's just a little stain. Hand me a napkin,
will ya?" Taehyung said softly, and Jeongguk felt something stir within him at how calm Taehyung
was acting.

Jeongguk nodded at his words, and reached for the napkin on the table and then turned around to
look at Taehyung. Jeongguk hesitated for a split second, and then reached forward and pressed the
napkin against Taehyung's chest.

"Sorry," Jeongguk said.

Taehyung, a little confused by Jeongguk's action, let his arms stay by his side. "Don't worry about
it,"

Jeongguk continued dabbing the napkin lightly against the stain of red wine seeping through his
chest. Jeongguk gulped and then realized how close they were. He looked up. A rather stupid
decision, he'd later realize, but he didn't at the time- and he saw how Taehyung looked down at
him with his deep auburn eyes.

Jeongguk felt this hitch rise in his throat, and goddamnit- he's a lawyer. Isn't meant to freeze up like
this, isn't meant to be lost for words, lost for thoughts. Taehyung's eyes didn't move an inch, stayed
boring into Jeongguk's warmer brown ones, until Jeongguk applied a little too much pressure onto
the napkin he was padding against Taehyung's chest.

"Ow-" Taehyung let out, and then put his fingers over Jeongguk's. "Are you alright?"

"Um- yes," Jeongguk said, moving his hand. "I-I'm perfectly fine. Why would I not be- are- are
you fine?" Jeongguk stammered, and Taehyung looked amused. He stayed silent, which
was killing, and Taehyung knew this. Of course, he did. Otherwise, he'd speak up. But no, he
remained quiet and let Jeongguk burrow himself in the hole he'd dug himself into.
"I mean your shirt. Is your shirt fine?" Jeongguk added, and god, how horrible thoughts were, and
how horrible those instincts that put forth them without a filter. How absolutely, redundantly
horrible.

Taehyung must've seen the cringe on Jeongguk's face, for he laughed. "Yes, my shirt seems well."

Jeongguk felt his cheeks deepen red, probably matching the shade of Taehyung's shirt. He grabbed
the glass of wine and lifted it to his lips, letting the velvety taste slither down his tongue until he
felt a hand on his waist and almost- almost- spat it out.

"Have you never had wine before?" Taehyung asked, looking delightfully aghast to see Jeongguk
swallow down wine like it's a tall glass of lemonade on a summer day.

"Of course I've had wine before," Jeongguk said, putting his glass down, humiliated to be asked if
he's ever had wine before. "But I'm also 23 years of age. I drink wine as regularly as you drink
cola."

"And I assume you drink a lot of that," Taehyung said, and then sighed. "I might've just met you,
but I can tell you know nothing of sophistication."

"Oh, and you do?" Jeongguk teased, and Taehyung smirked a little, leaning in to speak quieter,
Jeongguk presumes. "Have you seen my home, Mr. Jeon?"

Jeongguk looked at him and saw how his features were so defined, sharp, jaw slant and nose high,
cheekbones sculpt, and eyebrows dark. If Jeongguk was had another glass of wine or two, he'd
probably think Taehyung looked perfect. He definitely wasn't thinking that right now, while
silently looking at him. No, no way.

"Quite the aristocrat, are you?" Jeongguk whispered, and then felt the front his shoe get nudged by
another, and realized how close they were standing for their shoes to be aligned. Head to head,
practically. The symmetry was almost deranging, the irony of it.

"I can be," Taehyung replied, and Jeongguk saw Taehyung step back, and the negative space that
surrounded where Jeongguk stood which wasn't filled by Taehyung was irritating. Jeongguk didn't
know why.
"You probably own a boat."

"We call them yachts,"

"You probably own a yacht."

"Two, actually."

"You own two yachts??"

"Well, one and a sailboat," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk saw him pour wine into his own glass,
and then look at Jeongguk, and point. "We should go sailing sometime."

"Already making plans together, I see." A downy voice broke Jeongguk's avid imagination which
was envisioning him and Taehyung sailing together. Jeongguk looked and saw Veronica, and
Rosie stood beside her, both holding trays of food in their hand which they walked over to place on
the wooden table on the side.

Taehyung chuckled. "I've decided to take Jeongguk under my wing, teach him a thing or two about
the crème de la crème. After all, he will be working around lawyers."

Jeongguk blinked, focusing a little too much on how his name sounded rolling off Taehyung's
tongue. Like beautiful, it sounded beautiful. There are only a few things in life that are beautiful.
Starry nights, Love Me Tender by Elvis, and the way Taehyung said Jeongguk's name. Also Rosie
on their wedding day. In no particular order.

"I love that." Rosie chirped, smiling big. "You two could become friends! Like us," Rosie said,
getting excited over her own idea.

"Taehyung doesn't have friends, Rosie. He's too busy with work. Aren't you, love?" Veronica said,
walking up to him, heels clicking against the wooden flooring. Taehyung put his hands on her
waist.
"Love bringing that up, don't you?" Taehyung said, and then kissed her cheek delicately. He then
looked at Jeongguk and Rosie, while Veronica placed a hand on Taehyung's chest, smirking,
reminding Jeongguk of Taehyung in a way. Their likeness was almost fascinatingly disorienting.
Fascinating how they complemented one another, disorienting how Taehyung kissed her. Jeongguk
thought it looked slightly off. Probably just him, though.

"Oh- you've spilled wine on your shirt! Could you not be incompetent for one night, we have
guests over." Veronica said, in that posh voice which told Jeongguk she was from a high class
background without her having to say it.

"It wasn't me, darling," Taehyung said, and then looked at Jeongguk, smiling softly. "Jeongguk
spilled it on me."

"I'm sorry. It- it was sudden." Jeongguk said, and Rosie laughed fondly.

"Hm. Well then, I can't yell at you yet, not until I know you well enough." Veronica said, and
Taehyung chuckled.

"I'll yell at him for you. Would you like that, Jeongguk?" Taehyung asked, the corner of his lip
turning up.

Jeongguk paused. What was that supposed to mean? But he just laughed, he's sure it sounded as
forced as it felt.

"We should probably eat dinner before it gets too late. We've both got classes tomorrow." Rosie
said, and Veronica cooed.

"It's cute how young you are. Reminiscing. I miss it, don't you?" Veronica said, setting up the
dinner on the table. She always sounded so blunt and condescending, Jeongguk couldn't tell when
she was being sarcastic and when she wasn't.

"I don't. Apparently, if you're 23 now, you drink cola." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk laughed
airily.

The sound caught Taehyung's ear, must've, for he turned his head towards Jeongguk and smiled.
Jeongguk looked at him and looked away, not knowing why he did. But he did. And Taehyung did
too.

It went on for the rest of the night. Both locking eyes and then looking away. Dinner went
smoothly. The women mainly talking about who knows what, while Taehyung and Jeongguk
supplied their own comments every now and then. It was strange to see, but Veronica almost
exuded this nature of strong-headedness that Jeongguk didn't see much in women. Perhaps it
explained how silent Taehyung was, and the lack thereof when he was with Jeongguk.

"This was so nice, Veronica. Thank you. I missed you so when you went off to London." Rosie
said, fast, her fingers jittery. The contrast between her and Veronica was more than articulate.
Veronica was put together, self-assured, strong-minded, clearly highly intelligent, and didn't seem
to be looking for Taehyung's approval every other second. While Rosie was the exact opposite.
Jeongguk wonders if Rosie'll become the same after a few more years of marriage.

"Don't worry about it, Rosie. You live not too far from here, no? Come over whenever you please. I
hope to meet you two more often." Veronica said, smiling genuinely.

"Yes, please. All these 30- something lawyers and doctors are a bore after a couple of dinner
parties. There's only so much you can discuss when you spend your days staring at piles of paper
and bones," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk began giggling.

The giggling almost immediately stopped when Veronica looked at him. She looked at him for a
few seconds and then smiled. "You and Taehyung seem to get along well. Do spend time around
him. I don't want him to become boring." Veronica said, and Taehyung scoffed.

"You sound like a mother, Ronnie. That said, I wouldn't mind." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk just
looked at Taehyung and gave a nod.

They got up and headed for the door, the goodbye lasting longer as the women kept talking about
something they didn't on the dinner table. It's exhausting how much they have to talk about.
Jeongguk wishes they'd keep some of it bottled up for the next time they meet.

"So," Taehyung said, looking at Jeongguk. "Am I going to be seeing more of you?" Taehyung
asked, but he didn't; it was more of a statement. A rhetorical question, if you will, for he already
seemed so sure of the answer.

"If you want to," Jeongguk responded, and Taehyung chuckled.

"That's not a real answer. 'If you want to' is what people say when they don't want to. Really,
Jeongguk, I couldn't help notice how choked up you get sometimes," Taehyung said, and then
placed his hand on Jeongguk's arm. "Relax. Do some yoga, maybe. Works for the Indians,"

Jeongguk felt this flush of warmth flood over his face when Taehyung touched him, and some kind
of electricity buzz up his spine. He didn't know why, or what, or how. All he knew is he'd like it if
Taehyung touched him a little more.

"Yoga, right." Jeongguk chuckled, and then looked at Taehyung. He hesitated for a few seconds
and then nodded. "Yes."

"Yes?"

"You will be seeing more of me," Jeongguk said, and then felt himself grow timid at how
Taehyung's grin widened. "If you want to."

"I do," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk smiled.

Jeongguk later walked down the street from Taehyung's house to his own, walking alongside
Rosie, who complained about how cold it was. Jeongguk barely listened. Couldn't get Taehyung's
smile out of his head.

"Did you like them?" Rosie asked when they reached their shabby little home, taking her coat off.
Jeongguk took his off too, placing it on the coat hanger and walking down the floorboards and into
the kitchen.

"Yeah, yeah. Veronica seems nice. Rather intelligent, it's charming." Jeongguk said, and Rosie
walked up to him.

"And what about Taehyung?" Rosie asked, and Jeongguk felt a tinge twist his gut at his name, and
took out a jug of water and poured a glass for himself.

"He's- he's nice. Quite funny, don't know why you told me Veronica's husband would be boring."
Jeongguk said.
"Well, that's what Veronica told me! But he seems sweet, and so very handsome." Rosie hummed.
Jeongguk smiled to himself. So very handsome.

"I'm going to change for the night," Rosie said, leaning up to kiss Jeongguk's cheek. "Come to bed
soon, don't stay up reading again."

"Don't stay up waiting again,"

"You're mean sometimes." Rosie pouted, and Jeongguk looked at her, and then felt his shoulders
tensed, so he relaxed them. Didn't know why they got so tense. He leaned down.

"Love you," Jeongguk whispered, and kissed her gently. She smiled, kissed him back, then pulled
away.

"Love you too." She said softly, and Jeongguk smiled and then saw her turn around and walk away,
a small skip in her step, her hair bouncing as she did.

And as Jeongguk looked, he felt his mind blur.

He couldn't stop thinking about Taehyung.

*
 Chapter 2

**

When Jeongguk was eleven years old, he heard the word 'queer' for the worst time.

Being sprayed around like a dirt, being thrown into little boys' eyes who got confused and blinded
by the sudden abruptness of a word they'd never heard of. Suddenly, it became the biggest insult
there could be.

See, Jeongguk didn't know what it meant. No, not until he was thirteen. But he knew it was
something bad. He knew it was something one should be ashamed of, something one should laugh
at, and something one should get beat up for being.

Jeongguk got called a faggot once. Just once, when he was thirteen.

He remembers it clear as day. He remembers sitting under a big tree and reading a book. It was
called 'Darlings and Girls'. He remembers the word 'acceptance' and 'pride' in the book, and he
remembers reading about the woman in the book kissing the man in the book and getting
butterflies. He remembers the ending being unclear to him, because the man and woman didn't end
up together, instead the woman lived with her woman best friend. He doesn't remember why that
happened, but he remembers never asking.

Jeongguk remembers the book being snatched out of his hand, rough fingers imprinting the thin
paper and chucking it to the side. He remembers looking up and seeing 3 boys who were all older,
all on the track team, where they ran every morning for half an hour in tight shirts and shorts
around the field.

Jeongguk doesn't remember exactly what happened. They punched him in the face is what he does
remember. Punched him in the face and called him a faggot.

Jeongguk went home later in tears, hugging his mother tightly while she consoled him. When he
told her why he got punched, the reaction was a little different.

She got mad at Jeongguk for provoking them. Grabbed him by the arm, took him to the church,
and made him pray for two hours. She said if he didn't, he wouldn't get dinner. So Jeongguk did.
Didn't know what he was praying for exactly, but he did.

Jeongguk likes to think of destiny as the enemy.

Something so idealized might be something Jeongguk fears of the most.

His entire life is in the palm of someone else, a higher being, he supposes. The higher being can
meaninglessly card its gentle nimble fingers through his life and cause it to be burnt to ruins. That's
what destiny is.

Every single thing that happens, happens for a reason.

That is terrifying.

Every action, every word spoke, every thought, every motive for an expression- all of it, it means
something. Something which ties together for the grander scheme of things. Something which will
come together in the long term, and goddamnit- Jeongguk doesn't want to wait for the long term.
He wants those actions to piece together and have it's impact now.

Though sometimes, just sometimes, things happen which don't have any meaning. Which are just
for the fulfillment of the current moment.

See, over the course of a week since he'd met Kim Taehyung, all his mind could think of was Kim
Taehyung. Taehyung Taehyung Taehyung Taehyung. With his broad shoulders and soft smile,
sharp yet warm eyes. It's fragments and pieces of the night they met Jeongguk remembers, and
frankly, all of it feels like a dream.

Probably because Jeongguk has been dreaming about him since that night.

That probably didn't mean anything, right?

The dreams were different each time. He wonders if his subconscious has anything to do with that.
Jeongguk likes that word. Subconscious. It gives him a feeling that he is not one person, but two.
Two individual people conjoined to one, one trapped inside.

The first dream was the night after the meeting. It was Taehyung playing the piano while
Jeongguk watched.

The second dream was the night after. It was a dream of a ticking clock. And when the clock
struck twelve, Taehyung whispered to him to wake up.

The third, fourth, fifth, sixth dream had all been similar; thus, a pattern was set to place, and
Jeongguk was more than excited to fall asleep and dream of the man. Handsome. Handsome was
the only world Jeongguk could think of, but not say out loud.

The seventh dream was different.

It was darker. It was with mulling skies and screaming walls. It was with candles melting into nil
and trees turning into dust, with no seed to be left, no life to make further, nothing. The tree was
burnt down in a flash. No saplings ever to be made.

Jeongguk saw Taehyung. The tree was dead, but the ashes it wilted into seemed to be glowing.
And Taehyung walked up to Jeongguk and kissed him.

Jeongguk woke up in an instant. He couldn't breathe. He looked to the side, Rosie was sitting by
the window.

"Oh would you look at that," Rosie said softly, and Jeongguk saw the morning light illuminating
her, stature made evident through her white gown. "The communists sent another satellite to
space."

Jeongguk chuckled. "Let the Americans deal with it." He said, but he sounded choked up,
extremely confused by the events configured in his dream by his subconscious. Jungkook didn't
like that word anymore.

"Good morning. I've made some tea for you." Rosie said and then got up from the sofa seat
accentuated onto the slab stretching from the inter of the window. Jeongguk saw her walk over to
him, saw the frail cotton of the sleeping gown. Saw her breasts round and pressed against the tight
cloth of the gown. She opened her mouth to speak, yet;
"I need to go to church." Jeongguk let out, and Rosie paused.

"Y-you- why? You haven't been to the church since our wedding," Rosie said in confusion,
blinking her hazel eyes.

"I need to pay my dues. I-it- it feels right." Jeongguk said quickly, and then got up from the bed
and moved past Rosie. "Today's Sunday, right? They'd let me in- of course they would. Where's
the nearest church anyway?" He spoke quite quickly, seeing the tea on the table in front of the bed.
He picked it up, took a sip, and felt it cold against his tongue.

"The tea's cold," Jeongguk said, turning around to look at Rosie, who looked utterly puzzled. She
looked down in embarrassment.

"I-I'm so sorry. T-the water didn't turn warm enough, a-and I- I-" Rosie started, sounding fearful,
almost.

"Relax, Rosie. I'm not mad. I'll have tea when I'm back," Jeongguk said, and then set the cup
down. "Don't wait for me to eat breakfast, you look hungry."

Jeongguk washed his face with the water from the sink, and then took a coat and put it on.

"But-" Rosie started in a startle, following behind Jeongguk through the tiny hallway of their house
to the open stretch of the living room and kitchen. "-mum says the first meal of the day should
always be had with your husband, or else-"

"You mum says a lot of things," Jeongguk said, and Rosie paused for a second, and Jeongguk
sighed. "Sorry. I-I'll be back soon, I promise." Jeongguk said, and Rosie nodded quickly.

Jeongguk walked out the door, the cold November air sending chills down his spine in forms of
icicles without fettle. Jeongguk's hands toyed with themselves, a nervous instinct. The reason for
being nervous was more than clear, yet Jeongguk didn't want to delve on it.

Dreams are figments of imagination, illusions your mind creates when you're asleep, you have no
control over them. So he dreamt of Taehyung, a man, placing his lips on him, another man. The
absurdity of it, the absolute idiocy of the mere thought.

It was unthought of. Two men together like that? The preposterousness almost made Jeongguk
laugh.

Jeongguk walked till the church which was down the road, seeing passersby walk by with their
own motive, action, desire. The bleak walk was uneventful, thus finally spotting the church was a
joyous thing on its own. Jeongguk saw people entering, dressed in fancy Sunday clothes, whilst he
still wore home trousers.

Jeongguk eased himself. He was told he'd find comfort in places where things are pure. Near
people who are pure. Who are good. Jeongguk wanted to feel that comfort, he's unsure if he's ever
felt it.

Steps became faster, as did his pace towards the colossal building. Jeongguk almost stepped foot
inside- until he heard a voice. "Jeon Jeongguk?"

Jeongguk turned around. His breath hitched. Kim Taehyung.

The blonde haired man stood in front of him, dressed in simple home clothes. Jeongguk wouldn't
think of him as a rich lawyer if he saw him- yet, he still looked handsome. Jeongguk wondered in
the entirety of time he'd been away from the other man, that the beauty of Taehyung had been a
mere misconception. It'd had to have been.

No one had made that kind of an impression on Jeongguk; ever.

Yet, standing here, having said two words, with a laid-back grin on his face, hair neatly brushed,
clothes comfortable, he still looked so goddamn charming.

"Kim Taehyung." Jeongguk let out, and the man looked at him with peculiarity.

"Didn't take you as a church-goer." Taehyung chuckled, and Jeongguk looked into the hall he was
supposed to enter, but then felt his mouth go dry.

Wasn't the reason for his journey to avoid these delving thoughts he'd had of the older man?

Yet here the older man was, right in front of Jeongguk.

Jeongguk faced Taehyung. "I'm not," He said. "Just came for a little... walk, I guess."

"Understandable." Taehyung nodded but looked unconvinced. "I came for a little walk too. Would
you like to walk with me?"

"Yes, of-of course- absolutely." Jeongguk stammered, and Taehyung chuckled, and then began
walking, expecting Jeongguk to walk along.

Jeongguk cursed under his breath. Yes, of course, absolutely? Three ways of saying something that
could've been delivered through a simple nod? Jeongguk was embarrassing himself. He was always
so sure of himself, yet now, in front of Taehyung, he found himself second-guessing every
sentence.

"How's work?" Taehyung asked, hands slipping into his pockets, a gesture that somehow
emasculated him; and Jeongguk liked it, liked the emasculation. Something about the allurance it
radiated.

"Same old," Jeongguk said, and Taehyung scoffed.

"You sound like you're 40," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk looked at him.

"What? Aren't youngsters allowed to dislike their jobs?" Jeongguk asked, a little grin on his face as
he saw Taehyung smile too.

"Not when you've only been working for 2 days."

"Now you sound like you're 40. How old are you, anyway?" Jeongguk asked, and then his eyes
widened at the next thought. "Did you fight in the war?"

"No, I was too young," Taehyung said. "It was sickening. All the older boys, all intent to plunge
into their deaths. For what? Nationalism, the idiocy of it." Taehyung snickered, and Jeongguk
looked at him oddly.

"You don't think the war was good?" Jeongguk asked in confusion, and Taehyung finally looked at
him, brown eyes lighter in the daylight. "We did win, after all. We defeated the Nazis,"

"Oh Jeongguk, I expected better from you," Taehyung chuckled lightly, and Jeongguk
felt... offended?
A little embarrassed, maybe. Taehyung knew so much, and Jeongguk knew so little. He felt
inferior to him in ways indescribable. Taehyung must think he was a nobody! With stupid opinions
on important topics. Jeongguk was a nobody in front of Taehyung.

"Tell me more," Jeongguk pleaded almost, turning to look at him. "Please."

"Eager," Taehyung concluded, a glint in his eye which reached the smile which emerged on his
face. "I like it. Let's keep walking."

"Where're you going anyway?" Jeongguk asked, stood still while watching Taehyung continue to
walk down the path.

"Don't ask, just walk," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk was almost a little nervous with how
commanding his tone was, but he also kind of liked it.

Jeongguk caught up with him, put his hands in his pockets too, perhaps imitating him. "What do
you do for fun, Jeongguk?"

Jeongguk pondered for a second. Hesitation was never a good sign. It was almost kind of scary.
What does he do for fun?

"I... read," Jeongguk said, and then smiled. "I read a lot. I love reading."

"Everyone reads." Taehyung cut, and Jeongguk frowned a little. "What's something special that
you do?"

"Something... special? I don't know... why's there got to be something special?" Jeongguk asked,
and Taehyung hummed.

"There's no fun in normality, is there Jeongguk?" Taehyung asked, looking at him.

Jeongguk paused for a second and then tilted his head. "What do you do for fun?"

"I read," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk rose his eyebrow.

"But-"

"I also listen to a lot of music. My wall in my bedroom is stacked with records. Veronica gets mad
at me sometimes because of the abundance, but I love it." Taehyung said.

"Veronica seems smart."

"Oh, she is. Very intelligent. She doesn't need anyone's help in anything; she's practically a man on
her own." Taehyung snickered, and Jeongguk looked ahead.

Suddenly, he saw Taehyung stop in front of a store. A record store, selling discs. Jeongguk looked
at him for a few seconds, but then widened his eyes when he saw the man reaching for the door.

"What're you doing?" Jeongguk gasped, and Taehyung looked at him casually.

"Don't fret," Taehyung said, and then kicked the jammed door once and it opened.

"You- you can't just walk in there! That's trespassing! It's closed today- look, the sign outside the
door says it's closed!" Jeongguk said quickly, growing increasingly nervous that they might get
caught.
"I'm aware," Taehyung said, and then entered the store.

Jeongguk gulped, standing outside, looking from right to left to ensure no one saw them. Taehyung
looked at the walls decorated with numerous records and grinned, turning to look at Jeongguk. "It's
cold outside."

"You shouldn't be there. If the store owner sees you, he'll be very upset," Jeongguk said, cautious.

Taehyung chuckled. "You telling me you've never broken into a store before? Never shoplifted?"
Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk frowned.

"There's a reason I'm studying law, you know! Plus, you're like, 30-"

"26."

"Still! There's a respectable age for one to be loitering out, and 26 isn't it." Jeongguk said, and
Taehyung walked towards him, grabbed his arm, and pulled him into the music store.

Jeongguk heard the front door swing shut, until it was the two of them in the record shop, alone, in
the dark.

"You worry too much," Taehyung whispered, and Jeongguk couldn't make out his expression, just
his voice. "Relax. No one's going to catch us. I've been doing this for ages," Taehyung said, and
Jeongguk looked at him.

"Why?"

"Because it's fun," Taehyung said, and then smiled. "A little escape. I don't get time during the
weekdays, it's too packed on Saturdays, and it's closed on Sundays. Plus, their turntable is in
fantastic quality. They have a radio too, look." Taehyung said, pointing to the side.

"But- but it's wrong," Jeongguk said, his eyes big in worry.

"It's fun to indulge in wrongdoings sometimes, Jeongguk," Taehyung said to him, and Jeongguk
looked at Taehyung with confusion. "Why must we always do what's right, why must we always
conform to society? Why can't we just... take a step away from it all," Taehyung said, taking a
step towards Jeongguk. "And let the sins consume us?"

There was a silence, with Taehyung close to Jeongguk. Jeongguk stood there, fingers feeling
fidgety as they rolled into his palm. He took a step back, feeling a discomfort. The discomfort
coming from how he found their closeness a little too comfortable.

"The 'sins' being you breaking into a music shop?" Jeongguk asked, and Taehyung grinned.

"Precisely."

"But-"

"Ah- no more but's." Taehyung snapped, putting his hand up and turning around. Jeongguk
watched as he grabbed a disc and then carried it to a fancy turntable in the corner, and placed it
delicately, fixing it up. "I've had enough of your hesitation. Are you telling me in 23 years of
living, you've never done anything wrong?"

Jeongguk paused for a few seconds and then humphed. "No, mister, I haven't. I'm a good person."

"Oh, we're all good people. Being good is so boring sometimes." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk
heard the music playing softly, and looked at Taehyung.

Come Fly With Me by Frank Sinatra filled the room, crushing the silence with its soft strum.

"I don't have time to sin." Jeongguk scoffed, and Taehyung looked up at him from where he was
crouching in front of the turntable. "I have work, and then school, and then back home with Rosie.
I don't have time for self-indulgence,"

"Back home with Rosie? Why's that on the list of things which take up your time?"

"Because," Jeongguk started, and felt a salty residue on his tongue, his own confusion stirring him
to a silence. Jeongguk thought for a second and then nodded firmly. "Because I have to take care of
her."

"That's work for you?"

"You know how it is," Jeongguk said carelessly, leaning against the register. "You take care of
Veronica too, don't you?"

"Sometimes I feel like she takes more care of me," Taehyung mumbled to himself, standing up.

"It can get tiring at times. Rosie's too scared of doing anything. She asks my permission for
everything. I don't like getting mad at her, she's so sweet. It's... endearingly annoying." Jeongguk
said, looking down.

"Do you like that?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk looked at him with confusion.

"Of-of course I do. She's my wife," Jeongguk chuckled, and Taehyung walked closer to him, the
song reaching its bridge.

"Do you wish sometimes she'd take care of you too?" Taehyung asked.

"Rosie takes care of me- she does! She makes me tea, and she cleans everything, and she cooks
really well. I ask to cook sometimes, but she doesn't let me." Jeongguk said, and then forced a
small smile to his face.

Taehyung had a look on his face, the one where it seemed like he knew everything. But he didn't,
how could he? He just met Jeongguk- and damn, was Jeongguk really that easily readable?
Taehyung was hard to understand, difficult to read, yet Jeongguk felt like an open book to
Taehyung's knowing eyes.

He kept silent.

After a bit, they left the store, and while walking back towards their houses, Jeongguk talked of
Rosie.

"Rosie's parents and mine were close friends since ever. In a way, the marriage was arranged.
Rosie likes to think we're soulmates who met by destiny- and our parents just happen to play a part
in our fate."

"And I'm guessing you agree," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk didn't like how-how bored he
sounded.

"Am I troubling you?" Jeongguk asked, stopping in his walk to look at Taehyung.

"No," Taehyung said, looking at Jeongguk. "Of course not. I enjoy your company."
"You don't look like you do." Jeongguk hummed, looking down shyly. "I-I'm sorry. I guess I can
come off annoying sometimes. Rosie thinks I'm too serious- too mean. I don't mean to, I swear."

Taehyung laughed. Jeongguk looked up at him. It was beautiful, the sound of his deep chords
stringing a laugh. It was music, but better. "You don't come off as serious or mean at all, Jeongguk.
In fact, quite the opposite."

Jeongguk tilted his head in confusion, and Taehyung chuckled.

"Really? All my life I've been told I'm too serious."

"The seriousness you think of is just a shell you've surrounded yourself with. I'd like to see you a
little more... open." Taehyung said softly, and Jeongguk felt his cheeks redden.

"Y-you're suggesting this isn't how I always am. It is." Jeongguk said, and then looked away. "And
if it isn't, then I guess I don't know myself at all."

"Does anyone?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk looked at him. Pause.

"What's the last book you read, Jeongguk?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk thought for a second,
and then turned around instantly, facing the other way.

"Why am I faced with your back?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk blushed a little. "I mean, it's
rather plush, but-"

Jeongguk blushed harder and turned around. "How classy of you to comment on my backside!"
Jeongguk said, but couldn't help smile.

"What? It's simply an observation," Taehyung smirked, and Jeongguk bit his lip, hands tightening
in his pockets, felt himself swinging side to side.

"Well- I turned around because if I told you what the last book I read was then... you'd be mean
about it," Jeongguk said quietly, and Taehyung peeked at him closely, stepping towards him.

"I won't."

Jeongguk looked up at him, not discomforted by the comfort of their proximity any longer, in fact,
relishing it. "Promise?" Jeongguk asked softly.

Taehyung smiled, and Jeongguk couldn't help but notice how fond his smile was. "Promise."

"Nymph Of Tomorrow," Jeongguk whispered, and Taehyung looked at him for a few silent
seconds- and then burst out laughing.

Jeongguk blushed. "You promised!"

"I-I'm sorry, Jeon Jeongguk, I did promise," Taehyung said in between laughs, and then tried
quietening down, but couldn't. "B-but- Nymph Of Tomorrow? The book about the princess who
falls in love with a prince from the rival town?"

Jeongguk tapped his foot gently against Taehyung's, finding humor in how ecstatic this made
Taehyung. "How do you know about it, huh?"

"Veronica told me how stupid it was because she has to teach it to her women's class! Oh,
Jeongguk. I did expect something bad, but not this. This is- this is bad, is what it is." Taehyung said
with a smile, nodding his head, looking more than happy with the outcome.
"Well, what was the stupid question for anyway? Why've you gotta know what I read?" Jeongguk
asked in mock offense, and Taehyung began walking again, Jeongguk finding it in himself to catch
up.

"I wanted to know what kind of a person you were! You can tell a /lot about a person from what
kind of book they read, you know. All I read when I was a child were Captain America comics.
Not- not romance novels made for teenage girls."

Jeongguk looked at Taehyung for a few seconds and then humphed, looking away. "I think you're
plain rude," Jeongguk stated, and Taehyung pinched his side.

"Now don't be mad with me, Jeongguk. I just don't see how Rosie's reached this conclusion of you
being mean and serious!"

"Maybe you don't know me well enough," Jeongguk said sharply.

"Or maybe Rosie doesn't," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk stopped to give him a confused look, but
Taehyung kept walking.

"Well- my house is right there. I must get going, we've been gone really long." Jeongguk said, and
Taehyung stopped to look at him.

"It was nice spending time with you, princess Dandeline," Taehyung said, bowing slightly.

Jeongguk gasped. "You know the name of the princess from the book!"

"I might've read the blurb! But that's all- you get going or you'll miss your ballroom dance classes."
Taehyung said in a high voice, and Jeongguk walked towards his house.

"For your information, I dance very well," Jeongguk said and saw Taehyung twirl on the road,
which made him giggle.

"I'll see you later then, Jeongguk?" Taehyung said, seriously now.

"You will most definitely," Jeongguk replied, and then saw Taehyung looking as he walked up the
steps of his house to the door. Before he could- the door opened.

"Honey- where've you been? You said you went to the church, but-" Rosie started in fright, but
then looked behind Jeongguk and saw Taehyung standing on the other side of the pavement.

"Taehyung! O-oh- I didn't realize. Would you like to come in?" Rosie asked, and Jeongguk wishes
she didn't ask that.

For some reason, he didn't want to be with Taehyung with Rosie around. Something about their
friendship required intimacy; Jeongguk didn't know what.

"I'm fine, thanks," Taehyung said with a slight smile. "Why don't you two pop over for dinner next
Friday? Veronica's throwing a little dinner party. It's mainly colleagues, but Jeongguk- maybe you
could get to meet a few lawyers."

"Bet they'd be a riot," Jeongguk commented dryly, and Taehyung laughed.

"We'd love to be there! Thank you!" Rosie said gleefully, and Taehyung waved his hand, and
Jeongguk watched him walk off, smiling to himself and closing the door.

"I didn't know you went out to meet him,"

"I didn't. I met him by the church." Jeongguk said.

"What did you two do?" Rosie asked, seeing Jeongguk take off his coat and shoes. Rosie rushed
over to grab it for him, but Jeongguk placed it neatly to the side himself.

"Took a walk."

"He's lovely, isn't he?" Rosie asked, and Jeongguk looked at her. "Veronica told me all the young
girls fancied him in school."

"Veronica and Taehyung met in school?" Jeongguk asked, walking towards his study.

"Yeah. Known each other since they were kids." Rosie said.

"Oh. Must be nice."

"They eloped, actually," Rosie said, and Jeongguk turned to look at her.

"What, really?"

"That's why Veronica went away to London. She went with him. Her parents were devastated."
Rosie explained, and Jeongguk frowned. "Why'd they elope?"

"Well, Veronica wanted to run away since the start. I told her not to, but what did I know anyway?
I was so much younger than her. Her parents didn't want her to get a job or go to study after school.
But she didn't take no for an answer, so she ran away. And Taehyung ran away with her,"

"Why?"

"Because he really loved her. That's what Veronica told me, at least. She told me he said he'd do
anything for her. Proper Romeo," Rosie giggled.

"Really?" Jeongguk asked, a little surprised by this.

"Of course! Can't you tell the way he was looking at her that night? He loves her so. I mean, he's
letting her work and make all the big decisions. That's all out of love." Rosie said.

"All men should let their wives work, Rosie. No matter if they love her or not," Jeongguk said
simply, and Rosie stood by the door.

"Yeah, but it's not right, is it? I mean, we're women after all. Meant to take care of the house and
the children," Rosie said, and Jeongguk sat down on his chair in his study.

"Maybe you ought to learn a thing or two from Veronica," Jeongguk said. "You should get a job,
Rosie. It'll keep you busy."

"I don't want a job, dear. You're so sweet, my modern man." She giggled, kissing him on the cheek.
"I'll go make you some food, you must be tired from the walk."

Jeongguk hummed and watched her walk out. Once she did, he let himself delve into his own
thoughts. Taehyung loved Veronica that much? It didn't seem so, or maybe that was just him.

It made his stomach twist a little unknowingly. The thought of Taehyung so deep in love with
Veronica. It made him despise Taehyung a little, as charming and handsome and eloquent as he
was.
But of course; of course, he loved his wife. Why wouldn't he? Jeongguk loves his wife just as
much. He's meant to. Jeongguk let these stupid thoughts rid away as he burrowed himself in his
work.

**
 Chapter 3

**

The eighth dream was... peculiarly distinct.

Having the constant of Taehyung in his mind was dithering enough, now the man was conquering
his state of subconscious too. Jeongguk started thinking of him differently. Yes, he was smart, well
educated, well read, well spoken, but he was also so handsome. So handsome, that perhaps his
mind decided to play a few tricks with that deliberation in mind.

Jeongguk fell asleep at around 10 pm. Rosie was snuggled close to his chest when he did; and the
moment he slipped into a deep slumber, he was... making love, you could say.

The whole dream was confusing on its own. Everything was abstract as if drifting away slowly.
The scenery was stark white, faded, blinding to Jeongguk's eyes. He looked down and
saw Rosie, lying underneath him. She had her mouth agape, eyes wide, her blonde hair splayed
beneath her. She was naked, and Jeongguk realized he was gripping her waist while fluently
moving in and out of her. Her moans were silent, no sound leaving her mouth.

He continued doing it, at a pace which became boring. But soon, Jeongguk's head was filled with
numerous sounds and voices and signals, until Rosie wasn't there anymore.

Taehyung was.

And Jeongguk's pace increased, and his fluent snapping of hips against Taehyung's quickened, and
the bright white light turned a softer, warmer hue of oranges and browns. Jeongguk was so close to
Taehyung, seeing his soft skin and brown eyes looking up at him. Jeongguk reached down and
pressed the shell of his ear to Taehyung's cheek, until his moans were the only sound he could hear
until his pitched screams filled the room and Jeongguk was thrusting into him in a pace unknown,
until-

"Jeongguk!"

Jeongguk's eyes flew open, heart beating rapidly, a dent in his pants that was more than obvious.
He looked to the side and saw Rosie sitting beside him, a hand on his thigh. "Are you alright?"

"I-" Jeongguk started, and then moved Rosie's hand off his thigh, gulping down the shame, the
guilt, the pure horror of dreaming something so horrendous. "I-I'm fine."

"You look flustered," Rosie said softly, and Jeongguk's mouth went dry.

"I said I'm-" Jeongguk started, but then Rosie moved closer to him, pressing her lips to his temple.

"Let me take care of it," She whispered, and Jeongguk's hands fisted around the sheets. He nodded
faintly, the embarrassment taking over him as she moved the bedsheets down and saw his aching
member.

Rosie started working on it, and Jeongguk's mind wandered. Though bursts of pleasure were
entering his system and he was letting out slight grunts for a response, he couldn't help but
understand why he would even dream of such a thing. Kissing was one, but making love was
something else altogether. Maybe Jeongguk needs some medicine. That's what the doctors say to
do when one has homoerotic thoughts.

Rosie was moving her small hand up and down his cock, seeing it leak with precum. "We have that
dinner party at Veronica's tonight," Rosie whispered, continuing to caress him softly. Jeongguk
nodded silently, biting his lip to conceal a moan.

"Taehyung's going to be there," Rosie continued as if this was a casual dinner conversation. The
mention of Taehyung's name caused Jeongguk to whimper out in pleasure, thus leaping forward to
grab Rosie's nightgown and hide his head in her neck.

"O-oh- Jeonggukie, are you okay?" Rosie asked in a higher tone, a worried tone, and Jeongguk
nodded, bucking into her fist.

"Y-yeah- um- keep going," He whispered weakly, and Rosie nodded.

Rosie kept going until Jeongguk came in her palm, and she leaped forward to press their lips
together. Jeongguk kissed her back lightly, but couldn't help thinking of a bigger hand, wider
shoulders, and a man.

The night of the dinner party arrived. Jeongguk was dressed in a simple black shirt and tight pants,
while Rosie was in a pretty yellow dress.

"Do you think this is good for a dinner party? Maybe I should've worn something darker..." Rosie
said, looking at the mirror. She pushed her tufts of curls. "Does my hair look alright? I was trying
to go a little Monroe... though did you see on the newspaper what it said about her and Kennedy?
It's a bunch of rubbish, really. They'll never let that woman live! Though the way she was dressing
on that magazine cover was a little provocative," Rosie went on, and Jeongguk sighed, looking
annoyed.

"Must you waste so much time?" Jeongguk said, sounding unnecessarily rude. Rosie looked at him
quietly, and Jeongguk sighed. "Sorry. I'm just scared we'll be late,"

Rosie nodded. "I apologize. I didn't realize I took so long," She said, picking up a little cardigan
and smiling at Jeongguk. "We can leave now!"

Jeongguk nodded, and then opened the door and waited for Rosie to walk out to close it behind
them. They walked till Taehyung's house, but before walking into the garden leading to the main
door, Jeongguk paused. He turned to look at Rosie.

"Do I look alright?" He asked, and Rosie tilted her head.

"Pardon?"

"I mean," Jeongguk said, and then stepped closer. "My hair looks fine, right? I'm not overdressed?
Taehyung didn't mention if it was casual or formal or not. I'm afraid I might be overdressed."
Jeongguk said, and then tsked, looking to the side, clicking his foot against the ground in
frustration.

Rosie kept silent, looking awfully amused. "Oh, and what are we doing walking down here? It
looks so... unimpressive. And-" Jeongguk started, and then gasped, eyes widening like saucers.
"We've come empty handed! Rosie- Rosie, Rosie, why didn't you get the new bottle of wine? Oh-
this looks absolutely dreadful." Jeongguk ranted, and then walked away to the side of the
pavement.

"Well- where- where are you going?" Rosie asked, turning to look at Jeongguk, who was looking
away, nervously biting at his thumbnail.

"I don't want to go in anymore," Jeongguk mumbled, and Rosie giggled. Jeongguk looked at her.

"You sound like a lady," Rosie said with a fond smile, and Jeongguk blushed a little, and then
stopped.

He does.

Jeongguk gulped. "I was only joking," Jeongguk mumbled, and Rosie nodded. "Let- let's just go
in," Jeongguk said, and Rosie nodded again, still giggling to herself.

They walked into the house and walked towards it, and Jeongguk hesitated before ringing the
doorbell. The sound buzzed throughout the house, and Jeongguk heard the chatter coming from
inside. Oh! Jeongguk thought it'd be silent and boring- not full of livelihood!

The door swung open. Veronica stood there, her hair done up, wearing a simple red dress which
puffed out like how it looks on pinup dolls. "Oh, there you two are!" Veronica laughed, clearly a
little tipsy and looking a little free. "Come on in!"

Jeongguk smiled at her, and Rosie walked in, hugging her tightly. Veronica hugged her too, and
they both started talking about whatever it was they were talking about, Jeongguk couldn't find it
in himself to care. Jeongguk's eyes wandered about. A group of men stood by the fire, all talking
loudly and laughing, holding glasses of scotch. Women sat on the couch, all discussing something
and laughing out, glasses of wine in their hands.

Jeongguk walked forward, trying to look for Taehyung. He looked around for the blonde haired
man, and then suddenly felt a tap on his shoulder and turned around.

It was Taehyung, blonde hair a little messy, wearing a navy shirt and a thick tie, pants tight and
checkered, matching the tie. Jeongguk gasped. "Y-you're wearing a tie,"

"Observation. A good quality to have," Taehyung responded, and Jeongguk looked away.

"I knew I was underdressed," Jeongguk squeaked out, and Taehyung chuckled.

"What?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk looked up at him. "I-I didn't know it was a tie event. You
didn't make it clear. And, I didn't get any wine. I'm a terrible guest!" Jeongguk let out, and
Taehyung looked at him for a few seconds, and then burst into laughter.

"Oh, Jeongguk. Aren't you adorable," Taehyung said with a smile, and Jeongguk tilted his head in
confusion. "I don't care. No one does." Taehyung said softly, and Jeongguk nodded, blushing.

"Let me introduce you," Taehyung said, and then put one hand on Jeongguk's lower back and led
him into the living room, near the men. Jeongguk felt flushed by the simple touch.
"Namjoon, Jin- meet Jeongguk. Aspiring Lawyer to be," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk almost
gleamed a little, wanting to make a good impression. Taehyung almost gave Jeongguk a little
encouraging pat in the back.

"I'm Namjoon," The man with the dark brown hair said, wearing square glasses and dimples
besides his lips. "I work with corporate law."

"I'm Jin, it's nice to meet you. What kind of law do you work with, Jeongguk?" Jin asked, and
Jeongguk hummed.

"Um- criminal. Y'know, the best kind," Jeongguk laughed, and both men rose their eyebrows.

"That's debatable," Namjoon said.

"O-oh. I didn't mean to-" Jeongguk began, but got cut off.

"See, I think criminal law is a question of ethics. Individuals all across the globe work towards the
freeing of-" Namjoon began, and Jeongguk turned to the side to find Taehyung, but upon not
seeing him, realized he left. Jeongguk's shoulders dropped a little.

Almost half an hour later, Jeongguk rushed out of the living room and into the side room to excuse
himself. He breathed out in relief and then saw the curtains drawn for the balcony, moonlight
falling into the television room. A room just for a television, a color television. It was more than
obvious they had an abundance of money.

Jeongguk looked into the balcony and saw a blonde haired figure standing there by himself, and
his breath hitched. Jeongguk walked ahead towards the balcony, and then pulled the door open to
look outside.

"I must thank you for dropping a lamb into a lions cage and running away like that," Jeongguk
chuckled, and Taehyung turned to look at him. He had a cigarette in his hand and smiled.

"I'm assuming you were the lamb," Taehyung said, smoke leaving his mouth as he spoke. Jeongguk
walked into the balcony and stood beside him.

"Your friend Namjoon lectured me on why the criminal justice system needs working for a whole
26 minutes. Then he and Jin discussed the war. It was so entertaining," Jeongguk loathed, and
Taehyung laughed.

"I apologize," Taehyung said, looking outside. He pressed the cigarette to his mouth, inhaled, and
then let it go, breathing out. "I can't stand being around lawyers. I despise them," Taehyung said
gruffly, and Jeongguk looked confused.

"But you're a lawyer,"

"I know," Taehyung said, and then looked at Jeongguk. "I can't stand myself when I'm a lawyer."

"Well, why not? We're helping our country, aren't we? We prove what's right and what's wrong-
and- and we get money, and-"

"God, is that all that matters?" Taehyung snapped, sounding aggravated, startling Jeongguk.
"Money and recognition? How do we get to decide what's right and what's wrong?"
Jeongguk looked down. "No. That's not all that matters. I just- I-I just meant... I don't know."
Jeongguk said, biting his lip, feeling the same numbness his mind felt when he talked to Taehyung
the last time. "I'm sorry."

"Stop apologizing," Taehyung said, and then sighed. "I'm a little drunk. I had no right taking it out
on you like that." Taehyung said, placing his hand on Jeongguk's lower back again.

Jeongguk looked at him. "I... I had a strange dream last night,"

Taehyung hummed, taking another drag of his cigarette. "What was it?"

Jeongguk gulped, dancing his fingertips on the railing in nervousness. "I-I really shouldn't say-"

"Oh no, now I have to know. What is it, really?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk looked at him,
and then looked away quickly.

"I-I don't know," Jeongguk mumbled quickly. "You were in it," Jeongguk said, tight-lipped. "We
were in my flat,"

"And?" Taehyung asked, looking at him with the nearly intimidating look he always had. Jeongguk
gulped again.

"Well- you- it's really strange," Jeongguk stammered and then bit his lip. "You were- well, y-you
were under me,"

"Under you?" Taehyung asked, looking a little amused.

"Yeah. I-I was doing strange things to you. And- um- now I'm wondering why I told you this..."
Jeongguk squeaked, and Taehyung laughed.

"That is strange," Taehyung said, looking ahead.

Jeongguk looked at him for a few seconds. "Don't be angered with me. Please." Jeongguk pleaded
quickly. "I-It was just a strange dream, I swear. Maybe it's the stress. Or- or I drank a little. I don't
know-"

"If that's what happens when you drink a little, Jeongguk- I might have to get you drunk,"
Taehyung said with a smirk, and Jeongguk paused. He blushed.

"You-you're not finding it strange? I mean- a man with another man? It's- it's absurd. It's wrong."

"Nothing wrong with love," Taehyung said, and then smiled. "I think it's sweet. That people can
love so many kinds of people."

Jeongguk looked confused, and Taehyung chuckled. "I didn't expect you to get it-"

"I-I do!" Jeongguk insisted, not liking how inferior he felt in comparison to Taehyung. He stepped
closer to him, felt a need to. "You think it's alright for two men to love each other?"

"I think everything's alright as long as it's in complete accord of both resonating parties," Taehyung
said softly, and Jeongguk let out a giggle, hitting him lightly on the chest, and letting his hand
remain there.

"You're such a lawyer," Jeongguk said, and Taehyung put his hand on Jeongguk's waist, leaning in
a little.
"Oh darling," Taehyung said, his voice low, sending a shiver down Jeongguk's spine. "I
prefer artist."

Jeongguk blushed wildly and then realized how close they were to one another. Jeongguk was
about to pull back, but Taehyung wrapped his arms around his waist, confining him to the close
proximity.

"You're cold." Taehyung pointed out, and Jeongguk looked up at him.

"Observation, a good quality to have," Jeongguk whispered, and Taehyung started laughing, and
the sound of his deep joyous laugh sent tingles through Jeongguk's skin.

"I'll keep you warm," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk was a little confused, but then got spun around,
facing the outside. Jeongguk put his hands on the railing and then felt Taehyung's body slot against
the back of his, and a cigarette brought to his slightly puckered lips.

"Take it in," Taehyung whispered, and Jeongguk nodded, pressing his lips around the bud and
inhaling the smoke. Jeongguk did it for a few seconds, waiting for Taehyung to pull it out. Once he
did, Jeongguk blew the smoke out.

Taehyung moved closer to Jeongguk, one hand wrapped around his waist, looming over his
shoulder. "I know I said your bum looked plush-" Taehyung said, and Jeongguk let out a squeak of
surprise when he felt Taehyung squeeze his butt. "-but feeling it, I can confirm it is-"

"Get your hand-" Jeongguk said, and then pulled Taehyung's hand off. "-off my arse!"

Taehyung laughed and let the younger go, so Jeongguk turned around, giggling. "You're strange."

Taehyung hummed. "I like that," Taehyung said, and then flicked the cigarette into the railing,
smirking. "I like you, Jeongguk."

Jeongguk blushed lightly. "I quite like you too,"

"I think we could be good friends," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk nodded.

"I think we could."

Taehyung looked at him for a few seconds, and then Jeongguk saw him turn around, lighting yet
another cigarette. Jeongguk gulped, seeing the span of his shoulders, how in reality, his skin was so
tan, glowing under the moonlight. His blonde hair was rough yet soft, Jeongguk wishes to card his
fingers through it. He just- he had a strange longing for Taehyung. A longing he didn't understand.

Jeongguk stepped closer to him and reached out to touch his shoulder, but then Taehyung turned
around, and Jeongguk's hand went on his cheek. Taehyung let his hand fall, other hand holding a
cigarette. "You alright?"

Jeongguk was so close to Taehyung, and he wanted to say it. Wanted to ask about the inexplicable
sensation he'd been feeling around the older. How his heart began beating faster, how he got more
excited, how he began stammering, blushing, giggling- how much he wanted to be around the
older. It felt sickening, like an infection taking over him.

Except it wasn't.

Because being so close to Taehyung, Jeongguk felt a lot lighter than he ever has. Like he was rid of
all of his vices.
"Taehyung-" Jeongguk said softly, and then reached up. "I need to tell you something-"

Jeongguk brought his lips closer to Taehyung's ears, and closed his eyes, feeling the slight touch of
Taehyung's skin against his lips close to perfect, and then moved back in a sudden, not realizing
what he was doing. Except, Taehyung grabbed his waist, pulling him closer in.

He held Jeongguk so tightly, and Jeongguk was so close- that their noses brushed against one
another, and Jeongguk almost whimpered out. "T-Taehyung-"

"Sshh, my love," Taehyung whispered. "Let it be,"

Jeongguk gulped, feeling the creeping feeling he'd had this morning crawling up his spine at how
domineering Taehyung's tone was. He just held Jeongguk, and Jeongguk just looked at him
closely. Their breaths intermingled, and Jeongguk didn't know what he craved; didn't know what it
is he wanted.

"W-what- what are w-we doing?" Jeongguk asked voice awfully high pitched, expressing the inner
anxiousness he displayed.

"You ask too many questions, darling," Taehyung said again, and then looked closely at Jeongguk.
"You're awfully pretty,"

"T-Thanks-" Jeongguk squeaked out and then felt his cheeks redden at the man's intense gaze.

Jeongguk felt a magnetic pull towards Taehyung, and felt himself diving closer than he'd ever
been- and then;

A loud knock against the balcony startled the two of them- and Taehyung practically pushed
Jeongguk away, and Jeongguk was glad he did because his heart practically jumped out of his
chest- and god- it was all so practical-

"What're you two strange birds doing out there in the cold?" Veronica's loud voice came. "Come
inside- it's freezing out there!"

"Coming," Taehyung replied, and Jeongguk gulped, quickly heading towards the balcony door and
rushing back inside. He saw Veronica, looking a little tipsy. Taehyung walked behind Jeongguk
and sighed.

"Are you drunk again?" Taehyung asked, and Veronica giggled, walking towards him. "Nooo- I
would never. I'm a lady," Veronica slurred and then wrapped her arms around Taehyung's neck,
laughing.

"She gets drunk way too easily," Taehyung said, wrapping his arms around her waist while she
kissed his neck and jaw. "I'll- um- see you later?"

"Yeah," Jeongguk said, not being able to get his eyes off how Veronica practically slobbered her
red lipstick over Taehyung. Jeongguk walked towards the foyer, but then turned slightly and saw
Taehyung kissing her on the mouth, and Veronica humming into his mouth.

Jeongguk walked away. He saw Rosie talking to some woman. "Rosie, we better get going. I've got
work tomorrow,"

"Of course," Rosie said with a smile, and then said bye to the woman, and grabbed her cardigan.

The two of them walked till their house and rushed inside into the warmth. Rosie was quiet,
looking rather sleepy. She looked at Jeongguk with a pout.

"Can you carry me to bed?" Rosie asked softly, her eyes big, lashes long and blinking.

"I'm- um- tired," Jeongguk said flatly, and Rosie sighed, looking a little defeated.

"Okayy..." She mumbled, and Jeongguk looked at her but didn't say anything. They both walked
till the bedroom, and Rosie gasped.

"Oh! Veronica told me she's going back to Yorkshire for three days to meet her parents again. I
think I'll go with her, I miss my sisters," Rosie said. "If- if that's okay, of course. I'll stay here if you
want me to-"

"You can go," Jeongguk said, and Rosie looked at him like she was worried.

"Are you sure? I mean- who'd cook your meals? And- and clean your clothes? And the house- and-
"

"I can take care of myself for 3 days, god Rosie," Jeongguk said with a scoff, and Rosie looked
down.

"Sorry. You sound upset- I-I think we should sleep." Rosie let out quietly, and Jeongguk hummed,
taking his clothes off to wear more comfortable ones.

Once he was in bed, he played with his cold hands. Couldn't stop letting the swirls of wind in his
mind catch a drift of Taehyung. He couldn't help but think of the events that conspired that night-
the emotions his body flooded with, the jolts his brain received-

It's when he realized.

The thought of making Taehyung scream in bed didn't sound as electrifying.

Not as much as the thought of Taehyung making him scream.

Taehyung, with his large hands roaming down his tight body, gripping his thighs, rasping into his
ear, thrusting into him at a high pace, his eyes dark, his scent strong, his lips smirking as he'd call
Jeongguk his darling-

"Are you angered with me?" Rosie asked softly.

Jeongguk gulped.

No, no he wasn't.

"I'm not," Jeongguk said.

He was angered with himself, perhaps.

"O-okay. I love you."

Because the confusion his mind felt didn't compensate for the images of Taehyung. And god
fucking damnit. I love you- he should return it.

Yet, staying silent was what he chose.

**
 Chapter 4

**

Jeongguk leaned against the brick walls, standing outside a French boutique for women. The strong
hue of sunlight which expanded across the ivory pavement provided comfort at the beginning of an
early December.

23rd wild December and Jeongguk was already awaiting the aurora of spring. He loves Christmas,
not doing so would get one called a lunatic. Yet, something about the idiocy, the craze over
materialized goods. As time passes, Christmas became more about gifting rather than family and
love.

Jeongguk looked inside the tall glass window, peering inside to find Rosie, who was talking
brightly to the store clerk; who was coaxing her into buying the dress, which she obliviously
believed to be real compliments. She looked pretty, with her hair in a high ponytail, a skirt flailing
out- a bright green color with an abundance of polka dots on it. Latest fashion, he presumes.

"Did no one ever tell you to not stare at young women?" A voice came, and Jeongguk turned
around in an instant, eyes wide.

"O-oh-" Jeongguk let out upon seeing who it was. "Rosie's in there, I swear. I-I wasn't just-"

"I'm only joking, Jeongguk," Veronica replied, smirking lightly, looking polished with a beret on
her head, a long brown coat, and bright red lipstick. "You lawyers are so high strung," She laughed,
and Jeongguk let out a nervous chuckle.

"Rosie came here to buy Christmas presents for her family, yet... she's resorted to buying gifts for
herself," Jeongguk said, and Veronica laughed.

"Ah- how lovely. I'll join her." Veronica said, and entered the store, leaving Jeongguk to breathe.

Jeongguk looked around. If Veronica was here, Taehyung must be too. He peered across the
marketplace, seeing assortments of shops and merchants with carts full of fruit and such. His
excitement grew along with a smile on his face when he saw the older boy standing across the
street from him.

Taehyung was leaning against the wall, right opposite of where Jeongguk stood. The man had his
neck craned, blonde hair looking a little longer. He wore a long black coat, with thin brown shoes,
portraying the quintessential rich man. A cigarette sat between his lips, and his gaze was on
Jeongguk, an inscrutable look on his face. Jeongguk was allured.

He walked forward with a heavy stride, a jump in his heart, mind forgetting any earlier purpose,
motif, reason. Only thinking of Taehyung, wanting to meet him, hear the man's voice. Jeongguk
stepped onto the road, but the moment he did, a loud honk startled him- and a black Chevrolet
convertible screeched past him, making him stumble back.

The man driving the vehicle stuck his head out the window, angered. "Watch it!" He shouted
angrily, and Jeongguk gulped, eyes growing big in worry. He licked his chapped lips and looked
back ahead, and saw Taehyung gone. This caused his worry to increase.

Jeongguk turned around, but when he did, he saw Taehyung there and gasped.

"H-how-"

"You must watch out. London streets aren't like the ones in Yorkshire, lamb." Taehyung's deep
voice spoke, a look on his face, pleasantly occupied.

Jeongguk blushed. "I'm aware," Jeongguk stated, trying not to look as bemused as he felt. The last
time he'd seen the older man was the night of the party, which in memory seems foggy, tilted.
Every thought of it set Jeongguk's heart racing.

"I see Rosie and Veronica have found themselves quite comfortable in there," Taehyung chuckled,
looking into the French boutique, and Jeongguk hummed.

"I reckon you're stuck with me, now. How upsetting." Jeongguk said quietly, and Taehyung
smiled.

"Well then, aren't you a little sarcastic?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk giggled, hands in his
pockets, wanting to reach out and grab Taehyung's shoulders, how wide and firm they were.

"Only with you. You make me act... peculiarly." Jeongguk said, and Taehyung grinned.

"Ah, I see my charm is effective, as usual," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk laughed.

"Are you trying to make me behave strangely?" Jeongguk asked, and Taehyung looked at him, eyes
a little darkened in the bright sun. "I'm trying to make you do a lot, Jeongguk," Taehyung said, and
Jeongguk quietened.

This conversation, this harmony between every interaction they had- it was... confusing.
Demanding too much of Jeongguk's attention. He'd never felt so close, yet far from a person.
Never felt so discomforted, yet relaxed. Never felt so conscious, yet compliant.

"Let's go shop," Taehyung suggested, looking ahead.

"Shop? How ladylike of us," Jeongguk said, and Taehyung sighed.

"Oh, Jeongguk. I wish you'd indulge a little more in the ladylike tendencies of yours." Taehyung
said, looking at him. "I'd quite like that." He said and then began walking down the pavement.

Jeongguk almost ran to catch up, trying to walk at the same pace as him. "W-what do you mean?
You want me to be more ladylike?"

"Ah, don't overthink the things I saw, Jeongguk. I fear you'll think the wrong things." Taehyung
said.

"I can't help but overthink. You say a lot of things." Jeongguk said, admittingly. "A lot of things I
don't understand. Things I wish to, and- oh, Taehyung, you're all too confusing. I-I can't fathom a
single thing about you." Jeongguk said, and Taehyung looked at me.

"I don't think you'd enjoy knowing much about me, Jeongguk," Taehyung whispered.

"Oh- I-I very much would," Jeongguk said, and then shook his head. "I've never met anyone like
you. You're so different. I must... shamefully admit, I-I can't stop thinking about you." Jeongguk
said, and they were stood in the middle of the pavement, people walking past them. Why exactly
was Jeongguk saying all this? He couldn't comprehend, Taehyung's demeanor just put him at ease.

Taehyung looked at him, and Jeongguk waited; waited for something cerebral to leave the mouth
of the older. Something highbrow, intellectual, yet, a smirk fell across his lips. "Do you fancy me,
Jeongguk?"

Jeongguk looked at him for a few seconds, and a coarse blush fell across his face, much too bright.
He took a step back.

"What an awful, awful question to ask a man!" Jeongguk said, eyes wide in shock.

Taehyung laughed, and there it was; the sense of ease Jeongguk received at the airy tingles the
laugh sent down his spine. "You do, don't you? You fancy me, Jeon Jeongguk."

Jeongguk hurried closer to him, putting his hand on his mouth in a rush. "Don't be so loud- people
might think you're serious!"

Taehyung looked at him for a few seconds, and the almost scary look on his eyes- perhaps
resonating from the way his eyebrows rose- practically brought Jeongguk to another blush. "A-are
you... being serious?"

Jeongguk brought his hand down, and Taehyung looked at him for a few moments. He then gave
him a quick smile. "Of course not, Jeongguk. It was simply a childish joke."

Jeongguk nodded hurriedly, and Taehyung then took a few steps back. Jeongguk felt an odd
coldness take over him at the distance, but then the door of the boutique opened, and Rosie and
Veronica walked out holding shopping bags.

Rosie walked up to Jeongguk with a smile, holding the shopping bags, while Veronica handed
them to Taehyung to hold.

"I saw the most beautiful dress. It was a little expensive, but I'll wear it a lot, I promise. In fact, it'll
go splendidly with that hat I bought last month, and-" Rosie started, and then paused. "Sorry. I-I
don't know why I'm talking so much. I shouldn't bother you with these things."

Jeongguk looked at her. "It's alright, you can tell me things. I'm sure it's a lovely dress," Jeongguk
said, and then looked up and saw Veronica and Taehyung talking closely.

Jeongguk felt a fear that they might leave, that another week or two will pass before he sees
Taehyung again. "Would- would you like to join us for lunch? We're going to that American diner
that's opened recently." Jeongguk said, and Veronica and Taehyung paused to look at him.

Veronica began to speak, but Taehyung cut her off. "We're occupied today," Taehyung stated.

Veronica gave him a strange look and then sighed. "Taehyung, could you take your mind off work
for a minute? We'd love to join you for lunch, Jeongguk. And eating in a diner- honey it'll be like
the one we visited in New York." Veronica said, and Rosie smiled, while Jeongguk felt hesitant.

Taehyung looked a little aggravated, but Veronica turned around and walked up to Rosie, and
Taehyung had no choice but to follow her.

"I-I'm sorry, I didn't realize you had work," Jeongguk said to Taehyung, and Taehyung shook his
head.

"It's alright." He said, walking rather quickly. Jeongguk walked behind him. The two heard Rosie
and Veronica chat until they reached the diner, where they stepped in and got a booth for all four.
The checkered tiles and bright pink seats were almost unsettling.

They sat down, and Rosie and Veronica continued to talk about non-trivial things- clothes,
celebrities, other things that held no value to Jeongguk. He looked at Taehyung, who was silent,
seemingly odd to Jeongguk since he'd always been so talkative.

"We'll be leaving tomorrow, early morning. The cab will come to pick us up." Veronica explained.
"We'd be gone for... a week or so. Maybe less than that. Nonetheless, I do hope there won't be an
issue."

"I'll get dinner from that fish and chip shop nearby," Taehyung said to Veronica, and Rosie
frowned a little. "Oh, how horrible. You mustn't deprive yourself of a good dinner!"

Taehyung shrugged a little carelessly, and Jeongguk piped up. "Well, my-my classes end at four,
and I only work on weekends. Perhaps I could help you with dinner," Jeongguk said, and then
looked at Taehyung. "I-if you need it."

Taehyung looked at Jeongguk for a few seconds, and Rosie grinned.

"He cooks very well," Rosie added, and Veronica chuckled.

"How womanly," Veronica said, and Jeongguk's cheeks reddened at that, and he looked down.

"I-It isn't like that," Jeongguk stammered quickly. "I only cook sometimes. When- w-when I'm
free." Jeongguk said, and Taehyung hummed and slid out from the seat to stand up.

"I'm heading outside for a quick smoke," Taehyung said, and then put his coat back on and headed
for the door. Jeongguk looked at him with big eyes, and got up as well, grabbing his coat and
following him out.

Rosie smiled, looking at Veronica. "Oh, our husbands get along so well. Aren't you grateful?"

Veronica hummed, looking at her fingernails. "Immensely. Taehyung's got a tendency to allure
people. I'm afraid your husband's been charmed," Veronica said, and Rosie laughed.

"Jeongguk's too cold to be charmed. He's so distant sometimes, it's unnerving." Rosie said, her
bright smile almost fading.

"Taehyung's not distant, no. He can be; but of course, we all can. In fact it's good, I believe. We
should all be a little distant from each other. Closeness is so overrated." Veronica said, and Rosie
felt a little confused, yet nodded nonetheless.

Jeongguk walked out of the diner. He looked and then found Taehyung standing right at the end of
the block, behind the diner, smoking diligently. Jeongguk walked up to him. "Are you upset with
me?"

"What could've given that impression?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk looked away.

There was a silence, and Jeongguk felt his fist tighten inside his pocket. "D-don't be angered with
me. I'm not sure why you are, but don't be. I apologize for whatever it is I've done." Jeongguk said,
and then tsked, looking away.
"Would you look at this? You're nothing but bewitching to every sense of mine- yet I've got the
sense to upset you. It doesn't make any sense, does it?" Jeongguk said, and then turned around.

There was a silence, and then. "You're too worried,"

Jeongguk gulped. "I-it's only because you told me you're upset with me. I can't help but be worried,
wouldn't you be? Wouldn't anyone? I-"

"That's the reason why I'm upset, Jeongguk." Taehyung cut him off, and Jeongguk matched his
gaze to his. Saw so much, understood nothing. "You're too worried. Worried about what others
may think, what others may do, what I may think, what I may do."

Jeongguk paused, confused. "W-what do you mean-"

"See! Right there," Taehyung said, stepping closer. "You're thinking far too much, Jeongguk."

Jeongguk gulped. "I-I didn't think I was- I mean- I was- I was just c-confused, because-" Jeongguk
stammered, feeling small. Feeling insignificant in front of Taehyung, who knew so much, spoke so
well, made Jeongguk feel so intimidated.

"Hey-" Taehyung said suddenly, getting a little closer to him and putting his hands on his waist.
"Listen- I'm not trying to scare you or make you anxious," Taehyung said softly, and Jeongguk's
eyes were widened.

Jeongguk gulped. "I'm-" Jeongguk began, and then gulped. "Taehyung I-I'm confused. I'm sorry-"

"Don't apologize," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk felt Taehyung's arms circle around his waist. "Tell
me what's on your mind, Jeongguk."

Jeongguk mouthed for a few seconds, trying to grasp onto any thought he could put into words. But
he was unable to, and he looked at Taehyung timidly. "I-I don't know. I-I'm unclear on w-what it is
you want me to say- unc-clear on what it is I w-want," Jeongguk said, voice so soft, so scared.

"That's okay," Taehyung said, their proximity growing closer. "Don't think. You mustn't look for
clarity. Find unity with your impulse, Jeongguk." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk put his hands on
Taehyung's neck, feeling the warm skin in his cold hands.

"I know you don't understand," Taehyung whispered, and now, Jeongguk's mind was cluttered. All
he could see was Taehyung's eyes, all he could feel was his arms holding him, all he could feel was
utter chaos emerging from the pits of his stomach. "I know it's all too confusing right now."

Jeongguk's breath was hitched, growing heavier by the second. "But I promise, it'll all make
sense," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk shook his head.

"I-it won't- it never does." Jeongguk squeaked softly, and Taehyung couldn't help it.

He pulled Jeongguk closer in, if possible, and now Jeongguk felt their noses practically touching.

"Don't fret, little angel," Taehyung husked oh-so-quietly, and Jeongguk felt a whimper get caught
in his throat. "Give in."

Their lips met.

Jeongguk's mind roared in flames, and a spark of desire shot up his stomach, infiltrating his mind,
body, heart, uniting him with his wanton yearning. He felt the soft yet rough touch of Taehyung's
plump, warm lips against his.

With this brought confusion, questioning, anarchy in his mind, every thought at war against the
other, mind at war with the heart- complete chaos until he couldn't. Couldn't comprehend the
complexity of his own desires, so he pushed Taehyung away and stumbled back five steps.

"W-what-" Jeongguk started, eyes wide. "What- w-what was that? Wh-what did you d-do?"
Jeongguk stammered, and Taehyung looked frazzled for the first time.

Jeongguk brought his hand to his mouth, shaking his head. "T-that was wrong- wrong of us- wrong
of you!" Jeongguk snapped, and Taehyung licked his chapped lips.

"Jeongguk-"

"Don't speak my name," Jeongguk said, enraged. "Not from your lips- I never want to see them
again. You're a man, and I am one too. You- you must be insane!" Jeongguk cried, and Taehyung
kept silent.

Jeongguk found no response, only Taehyung looking at him with an expressionless look on his
face, as if waiting for Jeongguk's tantrum to finish. Jeongguk took a deep breath and ran off,
finding it unbearable to continue looking at the man.

Jeongguk ran into the diner, where he found Rosie and Veronica eating their food. Jeongguk ran in
and looked at Rosie. "Rosie- we-we must leave."

"Oh?" Veronica asked, and Rosie's eyes widened. "W-what happened?"

"Nothing. Nothing happened. We just- we must. We must leave in an instant." Jeongguk said, and
Rosie nodded, looking at Veronica wearily and grabbing her coat.

"I-I'll see you tomorrow morning," Rosie said, and Veronica nodded in confusion. Jeongguk rushed
out, and Rosie went with him, asking him many, many questions.

Taehyung walked into the diner, seeing Veronica sitting by herself, looking no more than amused.

"They ran out," Veronica said, and then smirked. "What did you say to the poor boy?"

"Absolutely nothing," Taehyung said, and then grabbed Veronica's hand, helping her stand up.
"My allurement scared him, I presume."

Veronica took some money out of her purse and chucked it onto the table, putting her coat on. As
she did, she felt Taehyung's arm around her waist. They walked out, and she took the cigarette out
of his mouth and put it into hers, smoking a drag.

Taehyung leaned into a whisper. "I'll fuck you nicely before you leave, yeah?"

Veronica smoked out, giving the cigarette back to her husband. "Of course you will." She replied
with a smirk, and Taehyung hummed.

**
 Chapter 5

**

When a wave crashes onto the shore, it crescents into a nothing. The sand drinks in the purity of
what is the water, and turns it into a mist.

When a wave washes past another wave, its attraction makes the waves grow bigger, wilder, and
the ocean's harmony remains intact. Breaking the harmony hurts not only the waves but the ocean
itself.

They say when two men kiss, they should feel a growing sickness in the pits of their stomach. This
sickness can overgrow and consume them whole unless one puts an end to it and does what's right.

Jeongguk felt no sickness of that kind.

Just doubt.

Early morning after the day before, Jeongguk was awoken to feathery lips against his. Just the
action had made him startled, grabbing his bedsheets before he had any clue on what's occurring.
Upon opening his eyes, he saw Rosie smiling at him, her breath minty against his face.

"I'm leaving now. It's awfully early, so you should go back to sleep. I've made you breakfast, kept
it in the kitchen." Rosie said. Jeongguk nodded wistfully, and Rosie leaned down to press their lips
together briefly.

Their lips pressing together reminded Jeongguk of what's right and what's wrong. This- this was the
right thing. This was the virtue, the better he should obey if he had any care of his own morality.
So he sat up, achingly so, and kissed Rosie a little harder, ensuring she felt everything.

Rosie smiled into his lips and pulled away after a few beats, blushing. "I'll miss you," Rosie said.

"I'll miss you too. Do call me." Jeongguk said, and Rosie nodded.

"Of course I will. I love you." Rosie said, kissing his cheek.

"I love you too. Let me drop you downstairs," Jeongguk said, and Rosie shook her head. "Oh no-
it's really cold out there! I wouldn't want you to fall ill," Rosie said, and Jeongguk got up from the
bed.

"Don't worry for me, Rosie," Jeongguk said, brushing her hair out of her face. "I hope you take the
next few days to think about yourself," Jeongguk smiled.

Rosie giggled. "I hope you too take the next few days to indulge in your own interests."

Jeongguk hummed. "I don't think you'd like if I did,"

Jeongguk grabbed a coat and wore it rather quickly, lifting up Rosie's bag and walking out of their
bedroom. Rosie followed behind him. "You don't have to-"
"Rosie, must you worry so much? I'm your husband, I should be taking care of you." Jeongguk said
softly, and Rosie nodded, looking down. Jeongguk kissed her forehead, and then opened the door
and walked outside.

It was cold outside, the skies still dark. A car was waiting outside their house, the flashlights
blaring. The car was silver, sleek, perfectly square shaped top. Jeongguk saw Veronica in the
driver's seat. "Right. Veronica told me she'd drive us down there. I-I suppose we could." Rosie
said, and Jeongguk hummed.

He walked down the steps of their house and onto the pavement. He walked to the back of the car
while Veronica climbed out of it, seeing Rosie and giving her a hug. Jeongguk opened the boot of
the car.

"Let me help you," A voice came, and Jeongguk looked up in surprise and saw Taehyung, his
blonde hair falling to his eyes.

Jeongguk picked up the bags himself put them inside the car, and then closed the back of it. "I
don't require your assistance, thank you very much," Jeongguk said roughly, and then walked
away.

"Well, we'll be going now," Veronica said, and then looked at Taehyung. She walked closer to
him. "I trust you can take care of yourself?"

"You must think I'm a child. Of course, I can, Veronica."

Veronica tsked. "You've never lived a day without me, Taehyung. You think too highly of
yourself," She chuckled, and Taehyung felt his teeth grind, his muscles tense.

Veronica turned around to walk away, and Taehyung grabbed her arm, pulling her back. "Don't talk
to me like that."

Veronica looked up at him. "What do you think you doing, trying to act imperiously? Don't irk me
too much, honey. I might just sleep with another man behind your back." Veronica smirked, and
then took a step away from him.

Taehyung looked away, biting the inside of his cheek. Veronica got into the car. Jeongguk hugged
Rosie tightly and Rosie kissed him and told him to take care. She got into the other side of the car,
giving Taehyung a smile on her way.

When Rosie got in, she looked at Veronica. "I think it's marvelous that you can drive,"

"Every woman should know how to drive. Relying on the men is simply idiocy. It is a prerequisite
forced onto us by society. I don't rely on Taehyung for anything." Veronica said and then began
driving, quite fast. "Absolutely nothing."

"O-oh-" Rosie said lightly, and then looked out the window. "You're so wise, Veronica. And I
think it's wonderful how liberal Taehyung is."

"I don't think he likes how nasty I am," Veronica laughed. "Oh well. It's not like he has a say in
things,"

Rosie hummed, not being able to relate in the slightest. She just nodded along.

Jeongguk and Taehyung both saw the car rush off, and Jeongguk coughed at the smoke it let out
from the back. When the smoke evaporated, Jeongguk saw Taehyung standing on the other side of
the road, looking away silently.

Jeongguk looked at him for a sparing second, and then Taehyung looked up at him, and Jeongguk
looked away.

"It's rather cold, isn't it? I heard it's going to snow soon."

Jeongguk scoffed. "You really don't have the right to be making mindless conversation."

Taehyung jaw dropped in a fake offense. "Excuse me- I happen to care an awful lot about the
weather."

Jeongguk hummed, looking away. "Well, you shouldn't. I don't wish to speak about the weather
with you, I simply don't care for it. Not with you."

"How impolite of you, Jeongguk," Taehyung said, walking across the road over to him.

"How humourous of you, Taehyung! To be talking like everything in the world's alright after what
you did yesterday." Jeongguk snapped angrily, pointing at him.

Taehyung looked at him, his hands in his pockets. "What did I do?"

Jeongguk looked at him with an eyebrow lifted up, and Taehyung tilted his head. "I must've
forgotten-"

"You think you're rather chucklesome, don't you Taehyung? Well, mister- if I must remind you.
You did the most horrendous of things a man can do to another man."

"Did you forget men killed each other only a few years ago? Nothing can be worst than that-"

"You put your lips! Lips belonging to a man, onto mine! Lips belonging to a man! I mean- that- i-
it's unheard of! It's absolutely horrid-" Jeongguk started, and Taehyung was frowning.

"What are you on about? Is this another one of those strange dreams you had, Jeongguk?"
Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk furrowed his eyebrows.

"N-no. You- you kissed me yesterday. Behind the diner."

"I did no such thing. My my, I did not expect you to be a fibber, Jeongguk." Taehyung said, giving
a little sigh that was over exaggerated, so obviously laced with an underlying tone of humor.

Yet, Jeongguk paused. He looked at Taehyung and let his thoughts wander again. Did Taehyung
really kiss him? The whole thing seems a little surreal, now that Jeongguk thinks about it. In fact,
Jeongguk only remembers bits and pieces. Perhaps it never happened. Maybe it was a dream. Was
it ever real?

"B-but-" Jeongguk began, and stopped, gulping. "I-I thought- but- y-you must have! I-"Jeongguk
started, and then hitched out a whine, turning around. "I don't wish to talk to you any longer."

Taehyung chuckled. "You're rather adorable, Jeon Jeongguk."

Jeongguk blushed. "I-I'm leaving now," Jeongguk said with a small crack in his speech, and
proceeded to practically run back to his house, back to his bedroom, into his bed, and crawled
under the covers to think.

For five whole hours, all he did was think.

While he got back up. While he took a shower. While he got dressed. While he ate breakfast. While
he walked down the streets towards work. While he walked behind the desk where he sat at every
weekend for his job. While he did the work he was supposed to do- all he did was think.

Think and think and think and think- until he remembered. Until his clarity was cleaned and
perspective was reinforced.

"Sir," Jeongguk told his boss. "I'm leaving the building for lunch-"

"Do as you must." He said gruffly. Jeongguk nodded, and then looked at the old man for a couple
of seconds and wondered if he really does any work. All Jeongguk sees him do is sleep.

Jeongguk left the building soon enough and walked across the road to the other building. He
entered it, asked the receptionist if he could visit Kim Taehyung, to which she nodded politely and
gave him the room number. Jeongguk walked up the steps and finally reached the floor belonging
to the man. He knocked on his door.

"Come in," Taehyung said, and then looked up and saw Jeongguk. Jeongguk paused when he saw
Taehyung on the telephone.

"Ah- These claims of you are stupid, I'll take care of it. Of course I will, sir. You can count on me."
Taehyung said, and then laughed, smiling. "Yes, yes. Great. I hope to see you soon, Mr. Justice."
Taehyung ended, and then put the phone down.

Jeongguk frowned. "You're Jimmy Justice's attorney? Jimmy Justice, the famous English pop
singer? Rosie loves him!"

"Of course I am. Now, this is quite the surprise, seeing you here. Sit down-" Taehyung said, sitting
forward and pointing at the seat. Jeongguk was about to, but then stopped himself.

"No. I-I remember why I came here," Jeongguk said, and then looked at him. "I thought about it. A
lot. All day I thought about it. And now, I can say it with much certainty," Jeongguk said, and then
looked at Taehyung with anger. "You did kiss me yesterday!"

Taehyung looked at him for a few seconds, and then hummed, leaning back into his chair. "I don't
recall."

"Of course you do! You-you're the one that's fibbing! I don't lie, Taehyung. And I'm slightly
affronted by your speculative claims." Jeongguk snapped, looking away.

Taehyung looked at him for a few seconds and then sighed, standing up. "If you must insist then I
suppose...." Taehyung trailed, and Jeongguk looked at him.

"That's not a proper answer."

"I'm unsure on what it is you want me to say,"

Jeongguk groaned. "You're driving me mad, Kim Taehyung! I want you to accept on what it is you
did. Admitting the truth would make everything less horrid-"

"I think it's a little strange how awfully you want this to be true, Jeongguk," Taehyung said, and
Jeongguk paused.

"I-I-" Jeongguk began, and then his cheeks turned pink. "I-It isn't like that. Y-you-"
Taehyung walked closer to him, and Jeongguk felt the intimidating aura the older exuded. The
confidence and surety of self, Jeongguk couldn't wrap his head around it.

"For sensibility's sake," Taehyung started, and then looked at Jeongguk closely, practically
towering over him, again glazed with the look of carelessness yet boldness, hands in pockets. "Let's
me make ensure myself. You've thought about me kissing you all day?"

Jeongguk turned redder. "I-I w-wasn't-"

"Let me finish speaking, darling," Taehyung said softly, and Jeongguk gulped, not even realizing
how Taehyung had cornered him to the wall. "Wasn't it you who had the dream about me being...
under you?"

Jeongguk looked down. "I-It was a d-dream-"

"Why did you dream that?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk couldn't help notice how much lower
his voice was, how much firmer.

"I-I don't know- I-I-"

"Scientist Richard Stelling's book, Dreamworks, published in 1896 states dreams are messages
from the subconscious mind," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk looked up at him, eyes wide. "Then
why is it, Jeongguk, that you dreamt of us making love?"

Jeongguk blushed. "T-Taehyung- this is-"

"Then, through follow up, is it not true that you could've dreamt about me kissing you?" Taehyung
asked, and Jeongguk gulped. "Furthermore, the lack of evidence provides absolutely no weight to
your argument, Jeongguk, hence," Taehyung spoke fast, and then looked at Jeongguk closely.
"You wanted me to kiss you. You wanted me to have sex with you. You wanted all of it more than
anyone else did- thus, the conclusion driven from this case is simple. You kissed me."

Jeongguk was frozen, eyes big, lips mouthing words that didn't leave his mouth, eyes almost
watery if he blinked another time. Taehyung's closeness brought panic to every inch of his body,
and before he could do anything, Taehyung took a step back and chuckled.

"And that," Taehyung said, and then sat down on his chair. "Is why I'm such a good lawyer."

Jeongguk broke, letting out a breath. "W-what?"

"I was just making all of that up, Jeongguk. I have no clue what I said. I was simply being
a lawyer." Taehyung said, and then grabbed a cigarette, lighting it and reaching it to his lips.

"Y-you-" Jeongguk stammered and then gulped. "You didn't m-mean a-all that? You j-just-"

"I was doing my job, Jeongguk. Rather splendidly, if I might add. If I had someone like you on the
stand, I'd win every case." Taehyung said, blowing out smoke.

"I d-don't understand. Did y-you kiss me? Or- or-" Jeongguk began, and Taehyung laughed.

"And what if I did? What will you do then, hm?" Taehyung asked, looking up at him in an amused
state.

Jeongguk opened his mouth to say something, but his thoughts trailed. "I-I'd just... I'd be very
cross with you...." Jeongguk said timidly, and Taehyung smiled softly.
 "Aw," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk blushed. "You'll be cross with me, will you? I can't have that
happen, not at all! The world must end before Jeon Jeongguk be cross with me,"

Jeongguk looked away, face mouth scrunching up to a small angered pout. "S-stop... talking to me
like that. I don't like it very much,"

"Why do you dislike it?"

"It makes my... stomach feel weird," Jeongguk said, and then blushed and looked at Taehyung,
who laughed fondly. Jeongguk tsked, taking a step away. "I-I'm embarrassing myself, aren't I? Y-
you must think of me so lowly. I'm stupid- I'm nothing but stupid. I must go."

"Jeongguk-" Taehyung began, and Jeongguk opened the door and walked out, feeling abashed with
his actions and words. Why must he act like this? He despised it. Despised how Taehyung made
him blush and stutter simply through words.

Jeongguk returned to work and tried his hardest to think of anything but Taehyung. Anything. Yet
he couldn't. He returned home from work, and his mind was cluttered with the older man.

He couldn't walk, couldn't work, couldn't perform the simplest of tasks without thinking of
Taehyung's eyes, hair, face, mouth, words, voice. Every thought sent jabs down his stomach, and
every time his image was brought to his mind, he had to sit down because it simply overwhelmed
him. His breathing felt shorter and his hands felt jittery. His insides felt numb. He felt in dire need
of something, something which he wasn't sure of.

Until he was.

Jeongguk, at 9:47 pm, encountered himself- in nothing but sweater and trousers- walking to
Taehyung's house. Once the approximately 8-minute long walk was finished, he found himself in
front of his rather large home.

He knocked on his door.

It opened. Taehyung stood there, still in work clothes yet no tie, hair a little messy. He looked
utterly handsome, it sent Jeongguk's stomach in swirls.

"Oh, Jeongguk," Taehyung let out. "Third meeting today. How exciting." Taehyung smiled.

Jeongguk gulped, looking at Taehyung. Unsure, unsure, unsure. He shouldn't. He

really, really shouldn't.

"Is there something I can help you with?" Taehyung asked after a lack of response, and Jeongguk's
mouth went dry. Don't, don't, don't- yet he had to. He had to, to fill in these urges his mind signaled
him with. He must.

"Could you-" Jeongguk began, voice weak and small, higher than usual. "Could you k-kiss me
again?"

Taehyung paused by the doorway, and Jeongguk gulped. He looked so fragile, shivering. It was
freezing outside, and he was stood in only a few layers.

"Jeongguk, I think you should come inside-"

"You're right! I should go home. Oh, what am I doing coming to you like this? It's almost 10, it's so
cold, y-you must be so tired. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. What am I saying? It's idiotic, I-I
apologize for wasting your time-" Jeongguk began.

Before his endless rambling could continue, Taehyung grabbed him by his waist and pulled him
into the house. He pushed the door close, pressed Jeongguk against the door, and then cornered
him into it, towering over him.

"Tell me what it is you want me to do. And say it slowly, and surely." Taehyung said, and
Jeongguk bit his lip.

"I-I-" Jeongguk began, and Taehyung shook his head.

"No, Jeongguk," Taehyung said, voice feathery. His hands reached Jeongguk's waist. "Don't
stutter. I must have you be sure of what it is you want."

Jeongguk gulped. "I-I don't know what it is I want-"

"I think you do," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk's hands went up to grab his shirt, looking up at
him.

"H-how? How do you know? How do you know everything?" Jeongguk asked, teeth chattering
ever so slightly. Out of nervousness more than the cold.

"I don't, Jeongguk. No one knows everything." Taehyung said and looked into his brown honey
eyes, his breath intermingling with Jeongguk's. "I'm just not ashamed of what it is I want,"

"I-It's wrong." Jeongguk squeaked, hands moving up and wrapping around his neck, arms over his
shoulders. "We mustn't do this- we-we-"

"You can spend your entire life questioning yourself, Jeongguk," Taehyung said, and then brushed
his lips against Jeongguk's. Jeongguk leaned in, a vibrated whimper begging to escape. Before it
could, Taehyung pulled away. "Or you could go ahead with your actions. Don't think. Just let go of
your fears and commit your sins. Sometimes it just doesn't matter. Sometimes, it's alright."
Taehyung whispered.

Jeongguk blinked his lashes, looking at Taehyung. "Y-yes-" Jeongguk whispered. "I-I want you to
kiss me, Kim Taehyung. I want your lips against mine own."

"Who am I to say no?" Taehyung smiled, and then leaned forward and sealed their lips together.

Jeongguk was frozen for a second but then felt Taehyung pinch his waist. Jeongguk let go of his
fears, his endless worthless thoughts and pressed his lips back to Taehyung's.

Taehyung moved his lips against Jeongguk's, fluently. His breath came quickly as Taehyung and
he traveled under bridges, over buildings, sloping down, down, down, then soaring up, up, up into
the horizon, through a passage of towering rock formations, rushing over great bodies of water,
suspended in the bright air, the sun rising out of the ocean. Kissing Taehyung felt like flying.

Jeongguk pulled away. "B-but what about- "Jeongguk began, and Taehyung's hands reached under
his thighs, and he lifted him up, making the younger gasp. He'd never been picked up, not like this,
not by a man, not to kiss.

"You think too much," Taehyung said and pressed their lips together once more. Jeongguk's hands
slipped to his hair. He'd never done anything like this before, not with a man. Taehyung carried
Jeongguk into their living room and placed him onto their couch.
Taehyung pulled away from the kiss, and Jeongguk gulped, looking up at him with his big brown
bright eyes. "T-Taehyung- we shouldn't,"

"Oh, but darling, we really should," Taehyung whispered into his mouth, and then kissed him
again.

"B-but what if-" Jeongguk started, and Taehyung kissed him again.

"Shush."

Jeongguk kissed him back for a second. "But w-we're men-"

Taehyung kissed him for a second. "Men are allowed to kiss."

Taehyung let his lips drag down his cheek, his jaw, his chin. "N-not each other..." Jeongguk trailed,
and Taehyung hummed, kissing up his chin, the corner of his mouth, the top lip once, the bottom
lip once- and then back to the other corner of his mouth.

"Hm," Taehyung whispered, and then looked at Jeongguk. "I am going to kiss you again,
Jeongguk."

"P-please do," Jeongguk whispered, and Taehyung pressed their lips together again. Jeongguk
grabbed his shoulders, wrapping his legs around the man's waist. He'd never done this, not with a
man. But kissing him- it didn't feel like the slotting of lips, it felt like the freedom of his body, his
soul, his thoughts. With his bone, flesh, muscle, tail spread out behind him, he took flight. Took
flight with his lips against Taehyung's. And there was only this.

Only this, no gravity, no sorrow nothing to hold him down. So just for a moment, they rose and
rose and rose, until they couldn't touch the ground.

Jeongguk pulled away, and both breathed against each other, Jeongguk's eyes closed. He licked his
lips, feeling Taehyung against him. Taehyung hummed, kissing down his neck.

"T-Taehyung-" Jeongguk began and then gulped. "W-what- what do you want to do?"

"What I want to do right now, darling," Taehyung began, hands on Jeongguk's hips firmly. "Is put
my lips against every inch of your body. Feel you on my tongue, feel your pulse on my lips-"
Taehyung began softly, and Jeongguk's eyes flew wide open and he pushed Taehyung off him.

Taehyung stumbled back, and Jeongguk stood up.

"W-what are you on about? Y-you can't put your lips against e-every inch of my body! That- t-that
isn't right!" Jeongguk let out, and Taehyung sighed.

"Don't do this again," Taehyung grumbled, and Jeongguk gulped.

"I-I only wanted to kiss you a-again. I didn't want- d-didn't want you to say all that. Didn't know
you wanted to- d-do further. How would two men do it anyway? It doesn't make sense." Jeongguk
began, and Taehyung walked closer to him. "A knife only goes with a fork. You can't use a knife
with a knife, it just doesn't-"

Taehyung looked at him closely and put one hand on his waist. "It'll make perfect sense. It'll all
make sense, Jeongguk." Taehyung said, and then kissed his cheek. "I could fuck you-"

"W-what?"
"Yeah- haven't you ever done it with Rosie?" Taehyung asked with a snicker.

"Of course I have! How ludicrous of you to ask. O-of course I have. I-I don't- didn't think it was
possible to do to a man. It shouldn't be." Jeongguk mumbled, gulping.

"Anything is possible in love and war, my love. You asked me what it is I wanted, didn't you?"
Taehyung asked, and then looked deeply into Jeongguk's eyes. "What I want to do, angel, is see
you naked, under me, with me fucking you until-" Taehyung began, and Jeongguk didn't realise
how close he was, how his lips were against Jeongguk's ear shell. "Until all you can think of is my
cock."

Jeongguk let out a whimper. "Doesn't that sound nice?" Taehyung smiled, looking at him.

Jeongguk was blushing, surely felt his trousers go tighter. He gulped.

"T-Taehyung, I must leave. I apologize. I shouldn't have kissed you, shouldn't have asked,
shouldn't have-" Jeongguk began, and then ran out of the living room, towards the door.

"You're going to run away again, are you? Hm, Cinderella? Will I have to find you in a little attic
and fit a little shoe onto your foot?" Taehyung asked with a small, not completely satisfied smirk.

Jeongguk gulped. "Y-you're being awfully brash today,"

"You've got me thinking, Jeongguk. Thinking about you dressed in nothing and- god, I can't
believe you thought I'd be the one under you." Taehyung chuckled. Jungkook tilted his head.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You'll understand later. Soon." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk shook his head.

"I don't wish to. I-I must leave. It's late, and- and I have work. Goodnight." Jeongguk said quickly
and then ran out of his house and down the street. All he could do was think.

**
 Chapter 6

**

A week passed in a blur. The new year approached with heightened glory, a closer gallop to the
60s. 1959, 14 years since the end of the second world war and the beginning to an era of peace, a
suspension of hostilities, freedom from disturbance.

Being only 3 when the war began, Jeongguk's childhood had been filled with ages of blackouts,
days spent in bomb shelters, nights spent crying with his mother because his father never returned
from the war.

And now, 14 years later; Jeongguk still hadn't found that peace that the world rejoiced with.

Jeongguk refused to leave his house because he felt far too cold; although he'd never been one to
fear the winter, now it was his worst enemy. He blamed everything on the winter. His uneasy
stomach. His cluttered mind. His cheeks which seemed frozen in a state of flames. All because of
the icy, numbing, dark filled cold.

Jeongguk didn't know if he was describing the cold or Taehyung's eyes.

"What do you mean you haven't left the house in seven days? Dearest, you must go out! What did
you do on the 31st? We always have parties, I apologize for not being there. Veronica told me
Taehyung had some friends over- did you not-" Rosie spoke over the phone, and Jeongguk's breath
hitched, hands tightening around the black telephone.

"No- I-I went out to a pub with Jimin. That's all." Jeongguk spoke curtly, and Rosie sighed over the
phone.

"Oh Jimin- he's- he's a good man. How are him and Aubrey?" Rosie asked.

Jeongguk gulped to himself. Taehyung had invited him that night, sent him an invitation by mail.
Jeongguk hadn't gone, no, didn't think his presence would be necessary. Would Taehyung be cross
with him for not attending?

"Jeongguk? Are you there?"

"Yes-" Jeongguk let out sharply. "And- I-I think the two had another falling out. Jimin doesn't
seem to take a liking to her." Jeongguk said. Jimin was his only friend from law school, the only
friend he'd care to spend any time with. All the others were too annoying or too vague.

"Why, Jimin doesn't seem to take a liking to any of the women he's with! Quite the philanderer."
Rosie laughed, and Jeongguk's mind went brim.

Why doesn't Jimin take a liking to women? Was he, perhaps, too inclined to men? No, no, how
ghastly to even think- however, Jimin does sleep around with several women and deem them all too
redundant for his liking. Jeongguk began wondering how many men were inclined towards men.
No- no it can't be a thing! It shouldn't!
"Jeongguk, you keep going silent, you must be tired. I-I don't want to give you orders- or-or tell
you what to do, it simply isn't my place, but, dear, you must go out! I know the house must be an
utter mess with books everywhere! That's okay, you aren't meant to do the cleaning about anyway.
I should be there. Mother's rather upset with me for leaving my husband for so long-"

"You must think I'm floundering without you, Rosie!" Jeongguk snapped. "I'm your husband, I can
take care of myself. Stop thinking you have to be down at my feet all the time- it's so archaic,"
Jeongguk grumbled.

There was a pause, and then; "I-I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to upset you, I-I just- I apologize,
Jeongguk. Please don't be upset with me. I-I was s-simply saying I-I should be there and- I'm
sorry!" Rosie said, voice soft and frail.

"I-I shouldn't have raised my voice. I'll talk to you later, I'll leave the house to get some groceries
and clean up a bit." Jeongguk said, and Rosie gulped. He could almost imagine her near to tears.

"A-alright. Goodbye." Rosie whispered, and then cut the call, putting her phone down.

Rosie was back in her maiden home, tears in her eyes, blonde hair in untidy curls falling onto her
shoulders. She wiped her tears away, sniffling and flattening down her apron. She heard the door of
the phone room open and saw Veronica walk in.

"O-oh- Veronica, what're you doing here? I thought you'd gone out with your father," Rosie spoke
with a stammer, and Veronica stood against the door. She wore a simple blue top and trousers.
Rosie gulped. "Y-you're dressed... strangely."

"I'm wearing pants, Rosie. It's a lot more comfortable than dresses and skirts, really. Father wishes
I didn't, thus, I wear pants." Veronica said, and Rosie smiled a little.

"Does Taehyung like it?"

"Who cares what Taehyung likes? He's never told me he doesn't. I think he likes a modern woman,
everyone does." Veronica said, and Rosie sniffled.

"Jeongguk does," Rosie said, and looked away. "He rarely raises his voice at me- y-yet- he did.
Over the phone. Sounded rather aggravated. Told me he wishes I was l-less archaic. I can't help but
be old fashioned, it's simply how I was raised! Mother's aghast I've stopped going to the church, I
mean-"

"Rosie," Veronica said. "Don't let him raise his voice at you. Though, he's not wrong. Women still
feel like they must get down on their knees for their husband- and no! We mustn't have any of that.
If I was born just a few years earlier, I would've gone to war, I tell you."

"To war?!" Rosie let out, eyes wide. "Why, how manly! Women can't go to war!"

"Well, I would have," Veronica said, smiling at her. "I adore you, Rosie. You do know why I ran
away, don't you? I don't like small towns. Don't like the way they shape the minds of the people
around. I wish to learn, to travel, to have finer things, to smoke, to drink, to drive, to be educated.
It's ravishing! Sometimes I feel like Taehyung doesn't allow me to do those things."

"Why? Is- is he mean to you?"

"Of course not, Taehyung's never mean. He's just... more traditional than me, I suppose. I love him
dearly, you know I do. He talks of wanting children, and I just- I could never have children, Rosie.
It simply disables you. A child's the same as a crutch." Veronica said.
Rosie laughed, but then quietened down when Veronica didn't. "You-you're serious? How could
you not want children? I've wanted children since I was a child- I simply don't understand you,
Veronica." Rosie said, looking down to the floor.

"I don't think I do either. Come on, let's go fish."

"B-but that's so-" Rosie began, and Veronica gave her a look. "I'm sorry," Rosie said silently.

Veronica gave her a small smile. "Oh, by the way, I called Taehyung earlier. He told me he's been
eating absolute crap for the past week- so I think it'd be good if he asked Jeongguk to come over.
You said he could cook,"

"He can! Splendidly." Rosie said, and Veronica grinned. "Great. Now let's go fry some fish." She
said, and Rosie nodded with a smile.

Jeongguk walked down the aisle, looking at the numerous food products in front of him. American
products, he presumes. They'd been over manufacturing almost everything and anything. All kinds
of weird named foods. What on earth was a 'hot dog'?

Jeongguk picked up a can of tomato puree then looked up to find the aisle for pasta. His eyes
widened when he saw a familiar blonde headed man walking around.

"Oh," Jeongguk let out and turned around to walk away at the highest speed he could manage
without looking like a lunatic. Jeongguk rushed into an aisle, and picked up the first thing he saw
without reading the label- and then looked back and saw Taehyung picking up some vegetables.
The man looked up and saw Jeongguk.

Jeongguk widened his eyes and turned the other way. Damnnit, he saw me. Jeongguk tried going
into another aisle, but then bumped into an older lady.

"Watch it, mister!" She snapped, hair growing white. Her groceries fell to the floor. Jeongguk
gulped. "I-I'm sorry!" Jeongguk let out frantically, kneeling down to pick her things up.

"It's you men born after the war! Got no clue about a thing whatsoever!" She said, loud and clear.
Jeongguk continued picking her items up, but then heard a clearing of throat.

"I apologize for my friend's ill manners, miss." A deep voice came, and Jeongguk looked up and
saw Taehyung, wearing a long coat as always. "Your words deem awfully true. Us young men, we
simply don't know what's right." Taehyung spoke slowly, and Jeongguk saw him take the woman's
hand, saw the woman's eyes wide, cheeks red.

"But why, what's a beautiful young lady like you doing at an awful place like this?" Taehyung
asked, voice drowsy. Jeongguk watched, still on the floor, confused and a little in awe.

"Y-young?" The woman let out, and Taehyung chuckled, inviting. "Why of course. You don't look
a day over 35," He whispered. Jeongguk almost scoffed. She looked days above 50, that's for sure.

Nonetheless, the woman blushed bright red and laughed high-pitched. "W-why- you-you're rather
charming, a-aren't you?" She said, shrieky. Taehyung smiled a little. "Only with you, ma'am.
Pleasure meeting you." Taehyung whispered softly, pressing a kiss to the top of her hand.

"Um- miss, your things," Jeongguk said, standing up, holding her basket of groceries. The woman
didn't even look at Jeongguk before taking her things, continuing to look at Taehyung. "S-s-
splendid to m-meet you too, young m-man." She stammered like a ditzy teenage girl swooned by a
young bachelor, then turned around to walk away.

"Isn't she a little old for you?" Jeongguk joked. Taehyung looked at Jeongguk and his smile went in
an instant.

"I did that so you wouldn't have to suffer the consequences of your actions. Now, I see you've been
avoiding me." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk gulped dryly.

"Preposterous," Jeongguk said in a mumble, and Taehyung scoffed.

"And what's in your hand, a can of tomato puree? Are you a child?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk
looked away.

"I haven't got as much money as you, so sorry for not spending it all away on a wine room,"
Jeongguk muttered. "Plus, i-it's only for dinner. Haven't gotten the time to crush tomatoes-"
Jeongguk began, and Taehyung looked at him closely and put his hand on Jeongguk's waist.

"You've got plenty of time, Jeongguk," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk's eyes grew big. "You're
cooking dinner for me tonight."

"I-I am? I hadn't heard of-"

"It's not a question, it's an order," Taehyung said, and then grabbed Jeongguk by his forearm and
began dragging him down the aisles of the grocery store.

"P-pardon?" Jeongguk let out, flabbergasted. He pulled his arm back, stopping midway. "I don't
take orders from anyone, thank you very m-"

"Oh, you do-" Taehyung spoke, looking at him directly. "You do when you behave badly."

"B-behave badly?" Jeongguk asked, hands coiling up into fists.

Taehyung snickered, unamused. "Ignoring my invite? My letter? My phone calls? I was afraid I'd
scared you off, afraid you'd something fraudulent." Taehyung muttered. "So I reckon you're
making me dinner now, Jeon Jeongguk. I heard you can cook, that's enough for me." Taehyung
said, and then grabbed Jeongguk and spun him towards the vegetable aisle.

"B-but-" Jeongguk began, and then found himself in the middle of the aisle, with a basket shoved
into his hands. Jeongguk looked at Taehyung timidly. "Y-you're being abrupt."

"Buy what you need to. Here's 20- pounds- I'll see you at my home at 7:35 pm, sharp." Taehyung
said, practically drowning the words into his ear. Jeongguk gulped.

He wished to protest, but likewise, he didn't. A part of him felt a radiant tickle shoot up his spine at
the way Taehyung was talking, so Jeongguk nodded. Jeongguk watched him walk out of the
grocery store, hands placed in the pockets of his coat. A breath left his open lips when Taehyung
walked out. How the man made Jeongguk's breath stop, Jeongguk would never understand.

Jeongguk bought all the necessities for his cuisine in mind, and a little more on things he needed
because, well, Taehyung gave him far too much money. Once Jeongguk had everything, he went
home. It was only noon, yet Jeongguk was wishing it was 7 pm already.

Ignoring my invites? My letter? Jeongguk thought of what Taeyung said. Letter? Why Jeongguk
hadn't seen any letter! Jeongguk rushed out of his house to check his mailbox and gasped when he
saw a letter inside. He took it out, seeing the expensive envelope and how neatly it was stamped.

Jeongguk walked inside, eager to read it. He sat down on his couch and opened the letter slowly as
if there was some sort of treasure inside. Jeongguk looked at the letter, and almost smiled when he
saw it was handwritten. Rich people rarely hand write things anymore. Why nobody does. Not with
those electric typewriters everyone used. But no, no Taehyung wrote this by hand, by ink. Spoke
his words into sentences.

Taehyung spoke so beautifully, every word made Jeongguk's senses stand on edge as if wanting to
get consumed by his every thought and notion. His letters must be absolutely magnificent.

My darling,

Each evening I think of you. I sometimes sit for ages, wishing to see a glimpse of your beauty.
When the curtains are drawn, my heart gallops. I see your pale skin against the watchful moon, she
compliments your skin so beautifully my darling.

I remember your lips from that night. It is a marvel that those red-rose leaf lips of yours should be
made no less for the madness of music and song than for the madness of kissing. I wish to kiss you
once, twice, and more, and more, and more times until I am soaked with your lips on mine.

I wish to do more.

I wish to see you with fewer clothes on, perhaps none. I wish to see your honey eyes grow larger. I
wish to see your bright cheeks go redder. I wish to put my tongue against every nook of your body,
feel the salt on your skin, feel your pulse on my tongue. I wish to take you to my bed, place you
down so softly.

I wish to fuck you until you're in tears, my darling. I wish to turn you onto your soft stomach and
fuck you like the beauty you are. I wish to do the service of Venus. I feel mad to do it some filthy
way, to feel your hot lecherous lips sucking away at me, to fuck between your two rosy-tipped
breasts, and-

Jeongguk stopped, eyes wide. What on earth.

His hands were practically trembling around the paper, cheeks bright red, thighs pressed together.
His cock felt hard against the fold of his trousers, and it made him whimper out in disgust. The
disgust of his own self. Moreover, confusion.

He refused to read on, how horrendous the things on the paper were. How well he wrote, but how
utterly ostentatious. Jeongguk couldn't read it!

He folded the letter and kept it to the side, and then ran into his study room to finish any work he
had, to do anything to get that letter out of his mind.

7:35 pm arrived. Jeongguk was fully dressed, in a coat, a nice shirt, tight trousers, yet he was stood
in his home. He wanted to go, yet the thought of having to face Taehyung made his insides
scream.

Jeongguk's mouth went dry. He'd go hungry, Jeongguk thought logically and gripped the basket
tighter in his hand. He must go.

Jeongguk walked out of the comfort of his home and walked till Taehyung's. He reached the lavish
mansion and knocked on the door. It swung open, and Taehyung stood there, cigar in his mouth.

"I do dearly hope you own a watch, or a clock, or anything which tells you the time," Taehyung
said, puffs of smoke leaving his mouth as he did.

"I was late. I hope that's enough of an answer." Jeongguk said firmly and then walked forward, past
Taehyung.

Taehyung looked at him oddly, and then closed the door and followed Jeongguk into his living
room, to which Jeongguk went into the kitchen, took his coat off and hung it to the side. "You
seem more than comfortable in my home,"

"Don't get the wrong idea," Jeongguk stated. "I'm only here to cook for you. That's all." Jeongguk
said, head high held. He placed the basket onto the counter and then humphed. "I hope you are
aware of that letter that you sent to me."

"Ah, I see you read it," Taehyung said, walking up to him. He was dressed in comfort, wearing a
brown shirt and trousers. "I hope you enjoyed it, Jeongguk. I wrote it with you in mind. Of course,
I'm sure that's evident-"

"Evident?" Jeongguk let out, turning around. "Kim Taehyung, you are a dishonorable, vulgar,
repulsive man- and I don't wish to speak with you. It would be in your best interest for you to stay
in your living room whilst I cook you dinner, for then I shall leave." Jeongguk said, turning back
around.

Taehyung was still. "What on earth are you on about?"

"That letter!" Jeongguk snapped, turning around again. "It- it was cheap! And something so- so
wrong written like it was nothing! I am married, Kim Taehyung. You're married! We're men! Are
you aware I don't have breasts, Kim Taeh-"

"Oh," Taehyung let out, and then began laughing. "Oh! Oh my, Jeongguk-" Taehyung said, and
then continued laughing, putting the cigar down. "I must apologize, this is absurd,"

"It is," Jeongguk said, frowning while wondering why Taehyung was laughing so hard. Taehyung's
knees bent slightly as he laughed, hand clutching his stomach. "What's so funny?"

"That letter-" Taehyung began and then giggled like a young girl. "The letter, darling, it wasn't
meant for you."

Jeongguk paused, and then gulped. "W-well then who was it meant for?"

"Veronica! Obviously! What made you believe I'd send that sort of a thing to you??"

Jeongguk's eyes grew wide and his cheeks reddened. His hands went up to cover his face.
Taehyung continued laughing. "Oh- T-Taehyung I'm so sorry-"

"Don't worry about it, love. I'm sure it was an honest mistake. I mean, me writing about wanting to
fuck Veronica's breasts must obviously be about you-" Taehyung said, and then began laughing
once more. Jeongguk's cheeks reddened further.

"T-Taehyung you mustn't say such things," Jeongguk spoke in a small voice. "I-It's rather...
obscene. Doesn't Veronica find these sort of letters offensive?"

"Oh please, you're like a young girl! No, Veronica quite likes them. The last time I wrote such a
thing, she'd walked around the house all day naked- quite the sight, I tell you." Taehyung said,
turning to lean against the counter.

Jeongguk gulped. "Doesn't seem like Veronica."

"She's rather peculiar. I love her for it," Taehyung chuckled, and then took another drag of smoke.
"Well then, I shall do as you please. Get cooking, I'll step outside-"

"N-no!" Jeongguk let out, and Taehyung took a quick spin to look at him. "You can stay. A-and
help, if you'd like."

Taehyung smiled. "Why of course, darling. Anything for you." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk
blushed lightly and then opened one of the cabinets to take out the pots and pans. While doing so,
Taehyung looked through the basket.

"I must ask, this box of cereal written on the receipt. Is that also for tonight's dinner?" Taehyung
asked, voice gruff.

Jeongguk froze. He looked at Taehyung with wide eyes. Taehyung looked at him slowly, eyebrow
raise. "Well it's just that- you see- I-I was out of cereal... and- and you'd given me so much
money... I-I didn't think you needed all of it b-back...." Jeongguk stammered, and then looked at
Taehyung cautiously.

"Isn't that rather rude of you, Jeongguk?" Taehyung said, voice suddenly formal, making Jeongguk
a little scared. An unfriendly tone. "To use my money without asking?"

"I-I'll pay you back! I swear! I'm sorry, Taehyung. I didn't think y-you'd get so upset over it-"
Jeongguk began, frantic, unsteady waver in his voice. Taehyung walked up to him, and before
Jeongguk could say anything, he grabbed him by the waist and spun him around to face the stove.

"I think you'd better get cooking, Jeongguk," Taehyung whispered into his ear. Jeongguk gulped.
He nodded and then felt a string go over his head and around the back of his neck. He looked down
and saw an apron.

But it was one of those new aprons that everyone had been buying. The white one, with the red
polka dots on it. The one that looked exactly like one of those short frilly dresses.

"D-don't you think it's rather w-womanly?" Jeongguk asked, but then let out a gasp when he felt
Taehyung tie it tightly around his back.

"I think it fits," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk gulped. Jeongguk felt Taehyung's hands on both
sides of his waist and then felt Taehyung lean in to whisper in his ear. "Do you miss Rosie,
Jeongguk?"

"Y-yes," Jeongguk let out, and Taehyung hummed. "I miss Veronica quite a bit too,"

Jeongguk turned his head to the side to face him, seeing his handsome eyes, how they looked
angered under his dark eyebrows. "I reckon if we both miss our wives, we can pretend a little to
make us feel better, can't we?"
"I-I don't understand,"

"Why don't you be my wife for tonight, Jeongguk?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk froze. "You
look the part already, yeah?"

Jeongguk gulped. He should say no. What an absurd thing to ask of another man,
another friend. How absolutely, undeniably, achingly absurd- "Yes, o-okay." Jeongguk let out,
letting his feet carry his thoughts.

The thought of being Taehyung's wife captivated him, even if pretend.

"You're rather good, aren't you? Now go ahead- make me dinner. I'll be outside, doing some work."
Taehyung said, and Jeongguk licked his lips and nodded. While walking out, Taehyung smirked,
and Jeongguk already loved it. The game they were playing, how it made Jeongguk's stomach feel
at his throat.

So Jeongguk began. He heard music playing from outside, heard the soft hum of jazz, heard
Taehyung talking on the phone rather curtly with someone. It sent every organ in his body to spin.
He took out a piece of steak and placed it onto the heated iron skillet.

While waiting for it to grill, Jeongguk began chopping some vegetables. He continued cooking the
steak and boiling vegetables. Everything was cooking perfectly. While waiting for the vegetables
to boil, Jeongguk walked out of the kitchen. He walked till the study and finally found Taehyung
sitting on his desk, typing something onto his typewriter.

"Taehyung?" Jeongguk asked, and Taehyung continued typing away. Jeongguk wondered if
Taehyung heard him. Before he could ask again, Taehyung put his hand up and motioned him to
come closer. Jeongguk walked closer to him.

"What is it?" Taehyung asked, finally looking up at him. Jeongguk felt Taehyung's arm wrap
around his waist. "Well I just- I wanted to know what it was you were doing,"

"Work, darling," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk hummed, biting his lip. Taehyung said nothing
more, and Jeongguk sighed.

"T-Taehyung- I don't understand what we're doing," Jeongguk said, and Taehyung looked up at
him. Jeongguk looked at him for a few seconds and then saw him smile. "I'm easing you into it,
my love. I know you're still hesitant." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk's breath hitched. "Now go
cook."

"Alright," Jeongguk said, and upon turning around felt a hard slap to his bum. Jeongguk rushed
away, blushing. He walked into the kitchen and continued cooking.

Once the meal was almost done, he heard footsteps and saw Taehyung walk in. "Are you done
yet?" Taehyung asked, and something in the roughness of his tone made Jeongguk's skin crawl.
Something in Jeongguk wishes Taehyung was a little meaner for a moment.

"Not yet," Jeongguk said, and then felt another slap to his ass. Jeongguk felt Taehyung's arms
circle around his waist. Taehyung hummed and kissed Jeongguk's neck. Jeongguk's breath hitched.
"T-Taehyung-"

"Don't worry, little angel. I'm just pretending you're Veronica," Taehyung whispered, and
Jeongguk's breath hitched.

Taehyung was so different. Different than anyone he'd ever met, anyone he'd ever spoken to.
Taehyung treated him differently than anyone he'd ever met. Taehyung didn't hold back. He didn't
hesitate, didn't cower his head, didn't treat him like a superior. He wasn't like Rosie.

Taehyung was rough with him and snickered at his dominance. Ordered him around and smirked at
his stammering. He wasn't sure why, but he felt his stomach feel queasy at that. He wanted it-
wanted more of how Taehyung was treating him.

His mind felt numb ever since Taehyung had kissed him, and the words Taehyung said had left
him shaken. The letter he read had left him shaken. He craved for Taehyung to be rough with him,
put him in his place. He'd been craving it since forever, but just realized it now.

"Taehyung," Jeongguk spoke and then bit his lip. "I'm afraid I'll have to make the meal all over
again,"

"What? Why? I'm famished, Jeongguk," Taehyung said, sounding a little irked. Jeongguk turned
around to look at him, toying with the front of his apron. "Well, I-I forgot to salt it. To salt
anything. I forgot all of it. I-I'm being awfully foolish today, I hope you're not upset with me,"
Jeongguk said, dragging his finger up Taehyung's forearm.

Taehyung looked down at him and smirked a little. He knew what Jeongguk was trying to do. "For
a law student, you sure are quite doltish, Jeongguk." Taehyung husked into his ear. Jeongguk put
his hands on Taehyung's shoulders.

"T-Tae-" Jeongguk began, and then felt another spank and looked at Taehyung with big eyes. "Y-
You do this with V-Veronica?"

"No, not at all," Taehyung said, smiling. "Which is why I'm enjoying this so much."

Jeongguk tilted his head. "Y-you said she walked around naked-"

"I was lying, Jeongguk," Taehyung whispered, hands roaming around Jeongguk's waistline, the
hem of his pants. Taehyung smiled at him. "Wanted to see how you'd react. Now I see,"

"S-see what?" Jeongguk asked, inhaling sharply when Taehyung loosened his pants and pushed
them until they were circled around Jeongguk's feet.

"I can see how badly you want this, Jeongguk." Taehyung continued, and Jeongguk gulped, now
feeling Taehyung's hands taking the top of his apron off and letting it hang down. Taehyung began
unbuttoning Jeongguk's shirt. "I can tell you want me to be a little mean, don't you?"

Jeongguk stayed quiet. "You want this, Jeongguk. Similar to, if not more than I do." Taehyung
whispered into his ear, lips pressed against the shell of it. Jeongguk's breath was hitched, arms by
his sides. "What I said last time scared you off, didn't it darling?"

"Y-yes," Jeongguk let out, and then felt his shirt fall off his body, crumble to the floor. Taehyung
put the top of his apron back on. "Why is that, love?"

"I-I'm c-confused, Taehyung-" Jeongguk let out. "I j-just don't think- I don't t-think this is right- it's
illegal for two men to be t-together, its-"

"Jeongguk," Taehyung whispered. "I don't care for what's legal or not. That's a stupid, stupid law
and you know it." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk gulped. "Deep down, Jeongguk, you've always felt
an attraction to men, haven't you?"

Jeongguk shook his head. "You've liked older boys, stronger boys, manlier-"
"D-don't continue," Jeongguk said quickly.

"You've always felt strangely with me, haven't you?" Taehyung asked. "You met me, what, 4
weeks ago? I'd made you feel queerly, hadn't I?"

Jeongguk's mouth went dry. "You're afraid to tell yourself that you want me, Jeongguk. You want
me to bend you over my desk and make love to you-"

"Taehyung I-" Jeongguk began, and then felt Taehyung's fingers wrap around the hem of his briefs.
"You don't know what you're-"

"Say no," Taehyung whispered into his ear. "Tell me you don't want this and I'll stop. Tell me I'm
lying and I'll leave you alone. Tell me you don't want to me to fuck you right now, and I'll go."

Jeongguk frozen. He was fully naked now, in nothing but the apron. The apron which looked like a
short, red, polka-dotted dress- Say no, Jeongguk thought. Say no. Don't commit this act of
infidelity-

Taehyung looked at him closely, and Jeongguk looked up at him. Looked at how his thick blonde
hair was parted, made him look so handsome. Taehyung was so handsome. It made Jeongguk's
heart skip a beat. He waited for an answer.

Say no. "I-I have a wife," Jeongguk whispered. Taehyung's lying. "I'm married." I don't want him
to fuck me right now- "I-" Jeongguk began, and Taehyung frowned a little.

"Jeongguk," Taehyung began. "Do you love her?"

Jeongguk gulped. "Does she make you happy, Jeongguk? Does she fulfill your every single need?"

"T-Taehyung, she-" Jeongguk began. "It-it shouldn't matter! She's my wife-"

Jeongguk felt Taehyung's strong arms circle around his bare hips. "Would you rather have her,"
Taehyung whispered, pressing his forehead to Jeongguk's. "Have her under you, have you kissing
her, making love to her," Taehyung continued, and all Jeongguk could focus on was Taehyung's
eyes.

"Or," Taehyung said, "Have me on top of you," Taehyung whispered, and Jeongguk felt his cock
harden. "Have me gripping your tiny waist like-" Taehyung whispered into his ear, and then
squeezed Jeongguk's waist, and Jeongguk let out a pitched sound, arms around Taehyung's neck.
"Have me fucking you?"

Taehyung looked at Jeongguk, who was frozen.

There are many, many things Jeongguk should've said. Many truths of the world, many fears he
felt, many sins he'd recited; yet- they'd be lies. They'd be lies because Taehyung was right.

"Have you fucking me," Jeongguk whispered eyes fluttered closed, lips against Taehyung's. "You-
you fucking me- I want you," Jeongguk continued, looking into his eyes. "Please."

"My baby," Taehyung said, a smirk playing on his lips. "Of course I'll fuck you, my love. So well,
so so well," Taehyung continued, pulling the string on Jeongguk's back, his apron falling to the
floor.

"W-what about the food?" Jeongguk asked.

"That was just a ploy to get you to let me inside of you- now let's go," Taehyung said, and
Jeongguk frowned, but felt himself get picked up bridal style by Taehyung, and let out a laugh.

**
 Chapter 7
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

**

Jeongguk smelt the earthy fragrance of the lavender oil sitting in a tinted emerald jar on the dark
oak side table. His fingers grasped around the bedsheets of Taehyung's bedroom, sitting up
nervously as he looked around. The room had one wall acting as a shelf, filled with records.

Jeongguk looked at Taehyung, who wore the brown shirt and trousers, shirt rolled till his elbows,
hair parted as usual. He was rummaging through the records to put on the right one, while
Jeongguk just remained tense.

Something didn't feel right.

Jeongguk's legs were tightly pressed together, and he watched as Taehyung began playing Love Me
Forever by Jodie Sands. Taehyung took out a cigar and lit the other end, and placed it between his
lips while looking at Jeongguk.

"You look frightened, my love," Taehyung said lightly, and Jeongguk let out a nervous chuckle,
looking down at the woven blanket he sat on.

"I-it just-" Jeongguk began and then gulped. He looked at Taehyung, who walked closer to him.
"W-what are we doing?"

"Must you question your morality at a time like this?" Taehyung asked, and then brought
Jeongguk's chin up to face him.

"We have wives," Jeongguk said, and Taehyung hummed, moving further to close the gap between
them. "We're married, Taehyung. Rosie trusts me, a-and-"

Taehyung brought Jeongguk's thigh up with one hand until both were wrapped around Taehyung's
waist, and he was lying on the bed. Taehyung looked down at him, smoking the cigar still.
Jeongguk gulped. "It isn't fair for us to cause this distrust, to partake in these- these unlawful acts-"
Jeongguk started, and then found Taehyung looking unbothered, in fact, amused.

"Doesn't these bother you in the slightest? Don't you love Veronica? Rosie told me the two of you
eloped together, y-yet-" Jeongguk stammered, and then put his hands on his collar.

"Of course I love Veronica," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk gulped. "But it gets a little tiring,
Jeongguk. To constantly be at wit's end with every responsibility, my home, my work, my wife,
my- my principles. I just want to escape from it all, really."

"Why-why me? Why not a young woman, perhaps one who-who isn't-" Jeongguk began, and then
gulped. "Who isn't a man?"

Taehyung chuckled. "I'm aware," Taehyung said, and then dipped down to kiss Jeongguk's neck,
making the younger shiver. "I'm aware of our wrongdoings, of how much easier it would be for me
to court a lady, yet-" Taehyung stopped, and looked into Jeongguk's brown eyes, how mystifying
they were, how ambrosial. "Yet there's something about you-you, a man, that makes my desires
towards men stronger." Taehyung finished, and then took his hands to the boy's hips.

"Your eye catches out for me, Jeongguk," Taehyung said upon Jeongguk's silence. "Your mind
may send you false alarms, but understand that this is natural. From the olden times, men have
loved men, women have loved women. I refuse to fight against what's natural, darling."

"But i-it's not natural, Taehyung." Jeongguk tried, eyes larger in fright. "You know what they say!
It's like a disease, it's like a mental di-"

"Believe what you want to, Jeongguk. If your mind is made up on being against it, then I won't
force myself and my morals upon you. It simply isn't my place." Taehyung said, sitting up.
Jeongguk sat up as well, clutching Taehyung's shirt.

"You must understand where I come from, Taehyung," Jeongguk pleaded. "I've never thought of a
man this way, never looked at a man this way, never wanted a man t-to-" Jeongguk began, and his
breath hitched at his own words that were about to leave his lips. "N-never wanted a man to hold
m-me down and-and make love to me. It's all so sudden, all so overwhelming! I don't know where
this attraction has risen from, a-and I'm afraid it's not natural. It can't be. Two men like us wanting
to be together- how are we any better than burglars?"

Taehyung was silent, and Jeongguk looked up at him, eyes shimmering. "I-I don't know what I
want. I don't know what my mind is telling me and what my heart is. I j-just don't know, Taehyung,
I-" Jeongguk began, and Taehyung tightened his arms around his waist.

"Let me help you," Taehyung whispered and pressed their lips together.

Jeongguk gripped Taehyung's shirt and tried his hardest not to kiss back. Taehyung pulled away,
and Jeongguk breathed heavily. Taehyung looked a little confused and then kissed Jeongguk again
with more heat. Jeongguk couldn't remain clamped up, so he began kissing him back, giving into
what gave him utmost pleasure.

Jeongguk felt one of Taehyung's hands traveling down his thighs, in between, and felt his two
fingers slither down towards his entrance. Jeongguk felt a prod and gulped, almost moving back.
"I'll be gentle, dove. I'll go slowly, make sure you don't hurt-"

"I-it'll hurt?" Jeongguk squeaked, and Taehyung sighed.

"A little, perhaps."

"Have- have you done it before? With a man?" Jeongguk asked, and Taehyung shook his head.
"No. You're one of the firsts to entice me."

Jeongguk blushed, and then saw Taehyung move closer to him and push him back until they were
lying down again. "If you forget about all that cluttering nonsense in your mind, you might be able
to enjoy yourself, love."

Jeongguk looked up at him and then nodded. "O-okay." Jeongguk let out. Something still didn't
feel quite right. Taehyung leaned down to press their lips together, but then a shrill loud ringing
sound filled the room.

Both turned their heads to the sound and saw the black telephone ringing loudly in the corner.
Taehyung groaned in annoyance, and Jeongguk sat up. Taehyung got off the bed to walk over to
the steel phone.

Taehyung had picked the phone up. "Hello?"

Jeongguk watched as Taehyung heard some words from the other line, and then saw the man run a
hand through his hair in annoyance, looking a little discomforted. "That's wonderful, love. Great.
I'll see you," Taehyung said, and then put the phone down.

Taehyung turned around to look at Jeongguk, who gulped, knowing what he was about to say.
"Veronica and Rosie are reaching in an hour. Decided to come back early."

Jeongguk chuckled, looking down. He got up from the bed, looking around for his things. "Look-
you can come over another time, perhaps when the girls aren't here, or-"

"Let's be honest with ourselves, Taehyung," Jeongguk said. "God didn't want us committing such a
heinous act. It's good we stopped before we got too far,"

"You say a lot but your actions never coincide with your words," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk
buttoned up his shirt and then looked at him wearily.

"Or perhaps you just say everything that's on your mind. Being confident is one thing, Taehyung.
Being dishonorable is another," Jeongguk said, and Taehyung scoffed.

"Oh shut up," Taehyung snapped, and Jeongguk tensed. "As if you weren't just swaying around in
my kitchen completely naked in nothing but a woman's apron,"

Jeongguk blushed brightly. "Which you made me wear!"

"I didn't hear any complains!"

Jeongguk looked away, putting his pants and trousers on quickly. "Well I- I shouldn't have to
explain myself to you. You're simply a terrible man who-who manipulates young men-"

"You're just afraid, Jeongguk. Don't pretend this is my fault. You begged me to kiss you and then
ran away. You begged me to fuck you and now you're running away. You can't keep running away
from something that scares you. Especially when you want it so much," Taehyung said sharply,
looking at Jeongguk closely.

Jeongguk gulped. He wavered a little while looking at Taehyung, but held his ground. "You know
this isn't right, Taehyung. Not only are we married with two wives who've done no wrong, but
we're men. I don't care if you think it's disgraceful to care about one's morality- I do!" Jeongguk
said, and then reached for the door.

Taehyung leaned against the doorframe. Jeongguk expected him to get angrier at his words, but he
looked pleased, almost smiling. "You're feisty, little one. It's captivating." Taehyung said, and
Jeongguk gulped, trying to leave his room. He walked away but then felt Taehyung grab his arm.

"You know," Taehyung said, and then looked at him. "Even a blind man could tell you're hiding
from yourself. This isn't a battle against me, angel. It's one with your own notions." Taehyung said,
and Jeongguk paused, looking at him with wide eyes.

"Y-you don't know me. You don't know me at all. We've only known each other for a month, y-
you-" Jeongguk stammered, and Taehyung let his arm go, bringing the cigar in his other hand to
his lips.
Jeongguk turned around to rush out of Taehyung's home. He ran down the stairs and to the foyer,
but before he could open the door, it opened itself.

Veronica stood there, holding a leather suitcase, hair falling to her shoulders, wearing a red coat.
"Oh, Jeongguk. Fancy seeing you here,"

Jeongguk gulped and looked at her. He heard footsteps from behind him and then realized
Taehyung was now standing beside him. "Veronica you said you'd be back in an hour,"

"Yeah, I lied. Wanted to make sure you weren't doing anything wrong," Veronica said, and
Taehyung snickered. She put his hand on his chest and pressed their lips together, and Taehyung
kissed her back. Jeongguk looked away.

"What were the two of you doing?" Veronica asked, and Jeongguk's throat went dry.

"I was helping him out with an upcoming exam he has for law school," Taehyung explained, and
Jeongguk gave him a look. Veronica hummed.

"I-I'll be going now. Rosie's at home, yes?" Jeongguk asked, and Veronica nodded with a smile.
"Yes, I've dropped her off," Veronica said, and Jeongguk nodded hurriedly. "Thank you.
Goodnight." Jeongguk said, and Taehyung cleared his throat.

"Do come around again, Jeongguk," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk frowned at him, grabbed his
coat and ran out of the house, closing the door behind him.

Once he left, Veronica looked at Taehyung. Both looked at each other for a few seconds, and then
Veronica looked around the house. "What did you do alone?"

"Nothing much. I met up with Namjoon one night at the pub, that was fun," Taehyung said, and
Veronica hummed, walking to the kitchen.

"Ah, Jeongguk made some dinner, huh?" Veronica said, and Taehyung walked behind her,
standing by the door.

"Must've gotten cold," Taehyung said, and Veronica looked at the floor, and then frowned.

"Where did that apron come from?"

Taehyung took a glass from the kitchen and then walked out, finding his bottle of whiskey outside.
"How am I meant to know?"

"I've never seen this thing before- you know I would rather die than wear crap like this," Veronica
snapped, and Taehyung chuckled, pouring whiskey into his glass.

"Angry again, are we? Relax, love. You've just gotten back-" Taehyung said, and Veronica walked
closer, looking up at him with darkened eyes.

"Don't be funny with me, Taehyung," Veronica whispered, and Taehyung looked down at her. "I
know you did something- and from what we agreed upon, you have to tell me."

Taehyung put his hand down her hair, stroking it softly and then reaching his fingers to her chin. "I
don't know what you're talking about,"

Veronica pushed Taehyung away lightly and then took a step back. She turned around, and
Taehyung rolled his eyes. "If you're so worried then I'll assure you, love. I didn't fuck anybody."
Veronica took her coat off, placing it onto the sofa. "That's what you said last time,"

Taehyung snickered. "As if you told me about that Latin professor at your college you let fuck you
last month? You can't expect me to share everything if you share none of it, doll."

"Don't call me that," Veronica snapped, turning around. "And I didn't bring the Latin professor
home, now did I? You probably asked your assistant from work to come over and fucked her
again!"

"I didn't bring anyone home, Veronica. I was caught up with work, and the only person who came
here was Jeongguk. Are you threatened by him?" Taehyung asked tauntingly, and Veronica
snickered.

"Me, threatened? You should be the one that's threatened, dear. Men love me," Veronica said and
turned around to walk up the stairs to their bedroom.

"You have no idea," Taehyung said to himself, taking a last sip of the whiskey and putting it down,
following Veronica up the stairs.

Jeongguk reached home and walked inside the shabby flat quickly. "Oh, Jeongguk!" Rosie let out,
turning around and rushing over to him. She wrapped her arms around him quickly. "I-I got so
scared when I didn't see you here,"

"I was with Taehyung," Jeongguk said and wrapped his arms around her. "I apologize."

"It's okay," Rosie said, smiling. She kissed him on the lips, and Jeongguk kissed her back. "I met
your mum. She- she was quite upset that you couldn't come. But I told her you had a lot of work,"

Jeongguk smiled at her and then took his coat off and walked to sit down on their couch. Rosie sat
down beside him. "Also, um- well- I-I talked to my father..." Rosie mumbled, toying with her
fingers.

"What happened?" Jeongguk asked, and Rosie sighed.

"He says I shouldn't be studying at college," Rosie said in a small voice. "Said it's a waste, me
doing botany and what not."

"I agree, honestly," Jeongguk said. "I think you should take business. Or better, English. You
could become a teacher, Rosie! Or-"

"No, Jeongguk," Rosie said, and then looked at him. "He means it's a waste that I'm at any college
at all. He says as a woman I should know my place-"

Jeongguk frowned. "What?" Jeongguk said, and then groaned, shaking his head. "Your father, he-
he still thinks he's in the '20s. That must've been really upsetting for you, I'm sorry."

"It did upset me," Rosie said, and Jeongguk nodded. "Because he's right! I should be at home! I
should spend more time doing what I'm supposed to. I made dinner one night and he said it was
awful! And-and he's surprised you haven't left me yet,"
Jeongguk was paused for a few seconds and then scoffed. "Are you mad? Why would I leave you
because you made bad food- and god, Rosie. The reason you're doing botany is so you can get a
job out of it! Maybe as a gardener for a rich home, or-or a horticulturist! Or open a flower shop, or-
"

"No no, I don't want any of that!" Rosie said, and Jeongguk frowned. "I don't want to work,
Jeongguk. I'm a woman, I'm meant to be a homemaker or a mother. Cooking, cleaning, raising
children, that's what I'm supposed to do!" Rosie said firmly. "I admire Veronica immensely but- it
was awfully strange seeing her back in the town. She wore pants and did fishing and all these tasks
men do, and-"

"What's wrong with you? Rosie, you aren't meant for anything. I know you think being the mother
is the only thing you can do, but you should get a job! Rosie- you need to get a job. My salary is
not enough for the two of us. I-I would hope you would get a job, at least for a little while until I
become a proper lawyer."

Rosie looked at Jeongguk wearily. "But that's- that's odd! Why must we change how things were?
Women belong in homes, that's how-"

Jeongguk stood up. "Rosie, you're being stupid!"

Rosie's eyes widened. "I-I don't mean to anger you! I just- I-I don't think it's right to-"

"At least stand your ground, Rosie. I'm getting a little tired of you constantly apologizing to me for
every little thing, constantly thinking I'm superior to you! I don't want that," Jeongguk snapped, and
then paused breath hitching.

Rosie gulped and opened her mouth to apologize, but closed it. She just nodded. "I-I'm only trying
to treat you like one should treat their husband. You work so hard, and-"

"Fine, but I don't need you to treat me like I'm your father or something," Jeongguk said sharply,
and Rosie looked away and nodded again. Jeongguk sighed, looking down. "I-I'm sorry. I didn't
mean to raise my voice-"

"No no please- don't apologize. You have all the right to shout at me," Rosie said quickly, and
Jeongguk tsked and turned around.

"I'm tired, I'm going to bed," Jeongguk mumbled, walking to his room. Rosie followed behind him
like a lost puppy, and that's when Jeongguk realized.

Rosie's complete submission to him was unpleasant, something that irked Jeongguk. But Taehyung
complete domination was something that made his insides crawl with pleasure.

He didn't understand why.

Two weeks passed. Jeongguk wondered if Taehyung thought about him. Because all Jeongguk
thought of was Taehyung. Even after Jeongguk been so horrid to him, he thought of the older.

Rosie had dropped out of college. She stayed at home now, reading more than usual. She looked
bored, if honest. Jeongguk couldn't be bothered to argue with her once more, so he stayed quiet.

Every time she opened her mouth, all she was do was praise Jeongguk and treat him like he was
some sort of king. He didn't want that, he just wanted normality.

"The things those Americans are doing in Vietnam is absolutely vile! Would you look at it?" Rosie
complained angrily, and Jeongguk hummed, walking back inside the warmth of his flat, seeing
Rosie on the couch.

"It's idiocy. To protect their ideology, they go fight a war in another country halfway across the
world." Jeongguk snickered, and Rosie hummed.

"I think America should let them be. Especially if the country wholly wishes to be a communist
state, I don't understand why the US wants to meddle-" Rosie began, and Jeongguk nodded along,
agreeing quite a bit with her remarks. "Then again- what do I know? I shouldn't be so into politics
anyway. Should leave that for the men," She laughed, and Jeongguk sighed.

Rosie got up to walk over to him, but then frowned when she saw Jeongguk looking upset. "What's
wrong?"

"I don't know, Rosie. It's sickening how lowly you talk about yourself. You being a woman should
at least think they deserve more. Plus, ever since you dropped out of school all you do is sit around
the house! I much rather have you working or doing something of value! I'm afraid, Rosie. I don't
think my income will last for both of us for much longer. I-" Jeongguk began.

He saw Rosie reaching in to hold his hand, but he pulled his hand away. In doing so, he
accidentally hit her on her cheek.

"Oh-" Jeongguk gasped and then widened his eyes. "Oh gosh- I'm so sorry. I-I didn't realize, I'm
sorry-"

"I-it's okay," Rosie said, putting her hand on her cheek. Jeongguk reached forward to look at the
slight redness forming on her pale skin, and then heard her say; "I read somewhere it's actually
somewhat therapeutic for quieter, shyer men like you to be abusive towards their wives-"

Jeongguk took a step back. "What?" He let out and then frowned. "I'm not going to hurt you, Rosie!
Don't think that-"

"I-I don't! I'm just saying, it would be fine if you did," Rosie said softly. "You get so upset with me
sometimes. I-I can't help but feel like I'm being rather hopeless and stupid. If you t-think you can
teach me in stricter ways, then-"

"Are you out of your mind?!" Jeongguk said, and Rosie looked up at him. "W-why- why would
you even think that? No, I'm never going to hit anyone, especially not you! Your stupid old
fashioned morals have driven you to absolute ludicrousy, Rosie," Jeongguk snapped, and then
froze.

Old fashioned morals.

"I-I-I'm sorry! I-" Rosie began, but then Jeongguk walked past her.

"I have some work to do. I just remembered," Jeongguk said, and Rosie frowned. "What work?"

"At law school. We were meant to meet up for a project, it slipped my mind completely. I think I'll
go over there, though I might get late." Jeongguk said, grabbing his coat.
"O-oh. Yes, of course. If it gets too late, then do stay over at Jimin's or such. The road outside your
college has many muggers," Rosie said, and Jeongguk nodded.

"Yeah," Jeongguk said, and then gave her a quick nod. "I'll get going." He mumbled and then
walked out. It was dark outside. He walked down the steps of his house and walked rather quickly.

When he finally reached the lavish mansion, he took a deep breath.

Inside, Taehyung was standing in the living room, looking down, trying his hardest not to say
anything harsh. "All I'm saying, Veronica," Taehyung began, digging his fingernails into his palm.
"Is that we should at least think about-"

"Don't bring it up again, Taehyung." Veronica cut him off. "You know I despise it when you even
bring up the thought of having a child."

"But I-" Taehyung began.

"Why do you think you get to have a say in things? You never did, and you never will. So keep
your mouth shut and go do your stupid law work," Veronica snapped, and Taehyung clenched his
fist.

"Right, of course. You could go on a tangent, but dare I speak a word against you," Taehyung
mumbled, and Veronica walked up to him and grabbed him by the front of his shirt.

"Don't you dare fucking talk to me like that," Veronica growled lowly, and then pushed Taehyung
back. Taehyung walked past her and into his study, practically fuming, but knowing he couldn't say
anything to her.

"You think I'm your stupid housewife or something, willing to have a baby for you and-" Veronica
ranted from outside.

"You know I don't think that, Veronica. I never have. I just think it'll help us settle down. And we
have a big house and we're earning fairly well, so-" Taehyung tried, but then saw her grabbing her
coat. "Where're you going?"

"I'm going out to meet my cousin, the one who's come here from Italy," Veronica said sharply. "I'll
probably return tomorrow morning," Veronica said, and then walked out and slammed the door
shut behind her.

Taehyung dropped his pen onto the table and covered his face with his hands. She gave him a
fucking headache, she really did. She didn't let him open his mouth during arguments like these,
and if he did, he was somehow demeaning women. He'd never understand it.

Veronica wasn't like this when they met. When they were only 18. It's like she'd become a different
person altogether at 26.

There was a knock on the door. Taehyung got up from the chair after a few seconds, assuming
Veronica forgot something. He walked to the door and opened it, and then saw Jeongguk on the
other side.

His hair was light brown in the moonlight, and he wore a high neck sweater and a long beige coat.
Jeongguk looked at him with a needy look in his eyes.

"If you're here to tell me I'm a horrible man, I've just heard it. Really not in the mood." Taehyung
said, and Jeongguk gulped.
 He shook his head. "It isn't that," Jeongguk said, and then looked up at him. "I saw Veronica
leaving. Is she going to be back soon?"

"Not until tomorrow."

Jeongguk hummed, and his eyes twinkled. Taehyung looked at him as well, waiting for his words
to be said.

But there were none. Both knew.

"I-" Jeongguk began and then stepped into his house. "I-I want you to fuck me."

Taehyung closed the door behind him and paused for a few seconds. "Are you going to run away
again?"

"N-no," Jeongguk whispered, clutching onto Taehyung's shirt. "Not this time. This time I want
everything- I-I need it. I need it so bad, Taehyung," Jeongguk said, whispering it into his ear.
Taehyung hummed to himself, taking Jeongguk's coat off and hanging it to the side.

"What do you need me to do?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk looked up at him, feeling his waist
get cradled, his fingers pinching the warmth of Taehyung's jaw.

"I need you-" Jeongguk began. "I need you to be mean," Jeongguk whispered. "I-I need you to not
hold back, not be pliant, not be nice, just-" Jeongguk said, and then kissed him quickly and pulled
away, feverish. "Fuck me."

Taehyung smirked wildly and reached down to pick Jeongguk up bridal style. "That is exactly what
I need too, Jeon Jeongguk," Taehyung whispered, and Jeongguk wrapped his arms around his neck
and kissed him again.

This time, it felt absolutely right, and both needed it more than ever.

**

Chapter End Notes

skjdksdj i keep cutting off at the smut!! but next chapter will be excitinggg ;)
 Chapter 8
Chapter Notes

relatively shorter chapter ): apologies

**

Jeongguk stumbled into Taehyung's bedroom, feeling nothing but nerves pulsating through him
since he'd had that conversation with Rosie. Nothing left Jeongguk's mouth, no words, no sounds-
but Taehyung reached forward and latched his mouth to the crevice of Jeongguk's neck.

Jeongguk let out a throaty whimper when he felt warm lips against the column of his neck.
Taehyung's hands circled around his waist, and Jeongguk relished in the feeling- never having felt
this way before. So helpless yet in full control.

Taehyung spun him around, and Jeongguk leaned forward, falling into his arms. Taehyung smiled.
"Get undressed," Taehyung whispered into his ear. "I'll put on a disc,"

Jeongguk obliged with a nod and then felt Taehyung's hands leave his tentatively smaller structure
and walk towards the record player in the corner of the room. Jeongguk peeled off his sweater and
dropped it to the floor, seeing Taehyung's muscled back.

Jeongguk ensured the unbuttoning of his shirt could be as loud as the process of unbuttoning shirts
conveys. He took off his trousers, rolling them off with ease and pushing them to the side, making
sure to hum while doing so. Yet, throughout all those sounds, Taehyung never looked. Just put on
the music.

"Won't you look at me?" Jeongguk asked softly, sitting down on the end of Taehyung's bed.

"Are you naked?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk licked his lips. "Not fully. I'm afraid I might
need your assistance."

Taehyung turned around, and Jeongguk saw a cigar in between his fingers. Jeongguk didn't know
when he got that, his eyes must've gotten entrapped by staring at the way the muscles on his back
moved with every hitch. Taehyung walked up to him, towering over the boy who was sitting on the
bed.

"If you aren't naked, Jeongguk," Taehyung said, blowing smoke out. "Then you've got no use for
me."

Taehyung turned around, and Jeongguk frowned, fingers bunching around his bedsheets. "I'm
mildly offended," Jeongguk stated, and Taehyung turned around, sighing.

"Baby," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk felt redness flowing into his cheeks at the new name he'd
been called. "Talk less." Taehyung continued, settling down onto his knees in front of the bed.
Jeongguk's mouth went dry.
Taehyung tucked two thumbs into the cotton washed waistband of Jeongguk's drawers. Jeongguk
saw Taehyung pull them down his thighs and then chuck them to the side. Taehyung looked at
Jeongguk's cock, sitting prettily against his stomach.

"Ah, I see you've excited yourself," Taehyung smirked a little, and Jeongguk resorted to reddening
further and gulped, knowing there was nowhere to hide, not in Taehyung's vision.

Taehyung reached his hand forward, wrapping it around Jeongguk's cock. Jeongguk's breath
hitched because this was different. Rosie had small hands, hesitant, dwelling small hands.
Taehyung's were large, controlling, calculating.

Taehyung moved his hand up his cock, and Jeongguk tensed at the rough feeling. He looked at
Taehyung, a silence passing while Taehyung eyed his cock as if thinking. Jeongguk opened his
mouth to speak, but before a word came out- Taehyung opened his mouth to put it around
Jeongguk's cock.

"A-ah-" Jeongguk yelped, eyes widening in dismay. The sudden abruptness of the warmth on his
cock was more than pleasing, but likewise more than daunting. It was odd, seeing someone so
manly, so handsome, so luxurious like Kim Taheyung with a cock in his mouth- but it was
almost fitting.

Taehyung moved his lips around Jeongguk's cock with closed eyes for a few seconds, and
Jeongguk's breathing turned heavy, but then he saw Taehyung pull his lips off, slick with saliva.
Taehyung looked up at him.

"W-why'd you stop?" Jeongguk asked in dismay. Taehyung smiled.

"Realisation, my love," Taehyung spoke fairly. Jeongguk saw his hand reach out somewhere
underneath the bed. "That I am quite in liking to the taste of your cock in my mouth, and;"
Taehyung added, and then Jeongguk saw a shimmering emerald-tinted glass jar in his hands. "That
you simply won't be able to control yourself in my mouth."

"Won't be able to control myself? You t-think of me as a child! I-" Jeongguk began, and Taehyung
suddenly hiked both of Jeongguk's thighs up and placed them onto his shoulders, sitting between
his thighs.

Jeongguk's eyes turned wide, for his legs were widened, Taehyung looking quite comfortable in the
gap in between. Again, felt quite fitting.

"Why, aren't you so pretty?" Taehyung said, and Jeongguk didn't know what body part he was
addressing. "How hairless."

"G-genetic," Jeongguk responded, and Taehyung hummed. He looked up at Jeongguk. "I'm going
to finger you now."

"F-finger me?" Jeongguk asked. "But-" Jeongguk began, but then relaxed his shoulders. "Go slow,
please."

Taehyung smiled. "I don't sense hesitance. I like that." Taehyung whispered, and Jeongguk then
looked at him for a few seconds and frowned.

"Why must I be fully undressed and you not? I wish to see you naked as well." Jeongguk said, and
Taehyung chuckled. Jeongguk watched as Taehyung opened the lid of the tinted jar and poured the
contents, oil, onto his fingers.
"You'll see me undressed too, my love. Patience is a virtue." Taehyung whispered, and then
Jeongguk saw three of his fingers, dripping in oil.

"Don't speak of virtue, not at a time like this," Jeongguk stated, and Taehyung leaned forward,
taking one hand in between Jeongguk's legs to pull his cheeks apart, get a better view.

Taehyung looked up at him. "Give me a word for when you feel catastrophic and wish to stop in an
instant. A safety word of kinds."

"How about... Polka." Jeongguk stated, and then giggled upon seeing Taehyung's eyebrow raise.
Polka dots, of course, the current biggest fashion craze.

"As you wish," Taehyung said, and then pressed a chaste kiss to Jeongguk's inner thigh. Taehyung
pressed one finger into Jeongguk's hole, and Jeongugk's eyes widened.

"Polka!" Jeongguk let out, and Taehyung looked up at him with a sigh.

"Please, you've barely even felt anything," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk gulped. He shifted a bit
when he felt Taehyung's finger press further inside of him.

"T-this is quite- i-it's quite strange." Jeongguk squeaked out, clearing his throat after. Taehyung
smiled, seeing his finger settled into his ass. "I like strange."

Jeongguk curdled his fingers around the bedsheets, feeling a second finger quickly push forth.
Jeongguk let out a whimper, closing his eyes rather tightly. "O-oh Taehyung- is- is this how
women feel? Is this how we make them feel?-"

"I'm sure," Taehyung said, and then saw as Jeongguk lay down on the bed. Taehyung snickered
and stood up, placing one hand on Jungkook's waist and really pushing his fingers in, leaning over
him. Jeongguk felt his eyes grow bigger at the sensation and saw Taehyung grin.

"I-I'm not sure how I feel about this yet," Jeongguk said. "You see, one hand weighs the notion
of guilt-"

Jeongguk felt a third finger go in and let out a yelp of surprise, kicking his legs up. "You talk far
too much," Taehyung whispered, and then began almost suckling Jeongguk's nipples. Jeongguk
looked down at his blonde hair and put his hands onto it, getting raked onto the bed with every
thrust of his fingers.

Taehyung was circling inside him, opening him up, feeling his chaste walls thoroughly. Finally, he
pulled his three fingers out with a slow drag, and Jeongguk felt a puff of smoke leave Taehyung's
lips.

Taehyung got off the bed to stand on the floor. Jeongguk lay on the bed, breathing heavily while
looking at the blonde man, arms by his side, legs pressed together. Taehyung looked at him for a
few seconds and then saw Jeongguk roll to his side, hiking his knee up to showcase his ass. "Won't
you come fuck me?"

Taehyung smirked wildly, and then practically ripped his clothes off of him, until Jeongguk could
see Taehyung's golden tan skin in the dim light, could see the lining of his core, could see his thick
veiny cock leaking against his stomach. Jeongguk gulped.

Taehyung took out a box from underneath the bed, and Jeongguk saw him take out a condom and
then roll it over his cock, walking over to Jeongguk. He poured a generous amount of oil onto his
palm and covered the vicinity of his cock with it, all while looking at Jeongguk, who continued
looking at Taehyung's cock with widened eyes.

Jeongguk felt... puzzled. All this time. All this time he thought this attraction was an off-handed
passing, a phase his mind dwelt like the moon. But- but no. It seemed. It seemed as if at this
moment in time, Taehyung naked was frankly the most attractive thing Jeongguk had ever seen in
his 23 years.

"You're so handsome," Jeongguk whispered out, and Taehyung's eyes only darkened. Jeongguk
crawled back onto the bed and saw Taehyung slowly climbing onto it and moving toward
Jeongguk. "Y-you're- you're so aristocratic, Taehyung," Jeongguk let out, and then felt the back of
his head hit the headboard.

Taehyung looked at him with his deadly eyes. Jeongguk put his legs up until his knees were
pressed to his chest.

"F-fuck me, Taehyung." Jeongguk pleaded hands made into fists.

Taehyung smirked. "Fuck you, I will." Taehyung rasped, and then instantly surged the head of his
cock to Jeongguk's entrance.

Jeongguk whimpered out, placing his hands on Taehyung's neck. Taehyung seemed pleased,
heightened with pleasure at how utterly, unequivocally pliant Jeongguk was. "My darling, my
sweet darling. I'm going to enter you now, my love. It might hurt a little," Taehyung whispered,
and Jeongguk nodded.

"I-It's okay. I'll like it. I'll like the pain." Jeongguk stammered, and Taehyung eyes mind wild.

"God, you're everything." Taehyung husked out, and Jeongguk blushed brightly. Taehyung
grabbed Jeongguk's hips tightly and slowly pushed into the boy.

Jeongguk's moans slowly and steadily escalated from soft and timid to louder and higher. As
Taehyung's cock continued to submerge into his tight heat, Jeongguk felt tears spring into his eyes,
entertaining the rough member into himself.

"T-Taehyung~" Jeongguk let out, eyes wide. "T-Taehyung, I-" Jeongguk gasped out, and Taehyung
pressed their lips together. Jeongguk felt this better, felt it calm him down. Jeongguk muffled a
moan into his mouth, and then put his hands around Taehyung's neck, legs swiftly wrapping around
the man's waist.

Taehyung dragged his plump lips down his cheek, reaching his earlobe and swirling his tongue
around it. "When-" Taehyung began, but Jeongguk was pleased to hear a hitch in his breath when
Jeongguk clenched tightly around him. "When I'm done with you, angel, you'll forget who women
are,"

Jeongguk's head was spinning as Taehyung continued to fill him to brim. "I-" Jeongguk squeaked,
feeling himself jolt as Taehyung continued to push forth. "I-I think I already have."

Taehyung's pace was slow, well-timed, as if every wave of pleasure was one after another, never
overlapping, only tingling him sensually. Jeongguk looked at Taehyung, his hands gripping
Taehyung's hair tightly. Taehyung continued to push further in and then grunted, dropping his head
onto Jeongguk's neck. "I can't help myself," Taehyung whispered, and Jeongguk let out a sound of
confusion.

Suddenly, Taehyung increasing the pace of his thrusts and began practically pounding into
Jeongguk's ass, his velvety walls dripping with oil and Taehyung's cock. Jeongguk felt his
fingernails drag down Taehyung's back as he let out screams of delight, the pace only increasing.

"A-ah- ah- T-Tae- nngh- T-Taehyung~" Jeongguk's voice vibrated through the course thrusts.
Jeongguk looked up at Taehyung and then gulped. "I-It's s-strange- strange ha-having you in-inside
of me,"

"Stranger for me, my darling. I can feel your breath, your pulse, every moan every /scream,"
Taehyung whispered into his ear, and Jeongguk dug his fingernails into Taehyung's shoulder. "So
perfectly, my love. So lovely. So fucking lovely,"

"T-Taehyungie," Jeongguk let out, slurred. "You-you're so-" Jeongguk began, but then suddenly
felt a more intense, more hard, more overriding sense of pleasure take over his body and pinch is
every nerve with psionic heat. Jeongguk let out a shrill sound of pleasure, a loud, loud moan,
tipping his head back and banging it against the headboard.

"I found it," Taehyung smirked, lips a lolling mess around Jeongguk's collarbones. "Found your
haven,"

And that, that's when Jeongguk knew this was the most magnificent, most extremely satisfying
pleasure he'd ever felt in his life. Every new thrust into the bundle of nerves in Jeongguk's insides
was like a glimpse into space.

Jeongguk suddenly felt himself get rolled to the side and saw Taehyung on his side too. Jeongguk
blinked his lashes which were damp with tears and then felt Taehyung's large hand squeeze his
cock. Jeongguk brought his hands up to cover his reddened cheeks and glistening eyes as he felt
the clement heat circling like a whirlpool in his lower stomach.

"Come for me, my love. You look so spent, so fucked out of it," Taehyung whispered into his ear,
holding him close through his hips. Jeongguk felt more thrusts, and his thighs pressed against
Taehyung's sides. "So beautiful, darling." Taehyung's deep voice whispered, and Jeongguk
sniffled.

He pressed his forehead against Taehyung's, and then opened his mouth to let out a cry of carnality,
but then felt Taehyung entrap his lips with Jeongguk's. Jeongguk kissed him feverishly and then
came like a young girl orgasming for the first time.

He felt tears wash down his cheeks, felt his grip tighten around Taehyung's shirt, and then came,
came all over his stomach and Taehyung's, both so close. Taehyung's tongue entered his mouth,
and Jeongguk cried into his mouth. He came for long, for feeling such heightened sensuality and
satisfaction is nothing but pure bliss for a man.

Finally, Jeongguk finished. He pulled away from the kiss and looked at Taehyung, who was red as
well, breathing heavily. Jeongguk knew his mouth was slick with saliva, his face was damp with
tears, his stomach sticky with his own fervor, and his hole filled with Taehyung. He felt so fucking
dirty, filthy.

Taehyung held the boy closely for a few seconds, and Jeongguk relapsed onto Taehyung's chest,
still feeling the weight of his cock inside of him. "You look obscene, little one," Taehyung said,
lips pressed to his ear. "Like a proper whore, taking all of me-"

"T-Taehyung," Jeongguk whimpered into his neck.

"And you want more, don't you?" Taehyung continued, and Jeongguk felt his face full of his tears
and then felt himself get rolled over so Taehyung was on top of him again. "Want me to continue
fucking you, don't you?"

Jeongguk blushed pink, and fuck was he a vision of glory. His eyes big, glittering with tears and
dilated, his light brown hair messed onto the pillow, his lips plump and bitten, his cheeks bright
pink, and you could still see the neediness in his doe eyes.

"You're tantalizing, my love." Taehyung let out, breathing heavily. He felt close to climax and
slowly began to ride it out by thrusting into Jeongguk. Jeongguk had his hands up beside his head.
"How fascinating it is to have you under me."

Jeongguk found no words, for he knew only worthless whimpers would leave his lips at this point.
So he stared up at Taehyung in wonder and bewilderment as Taehyung fucked him thoroughly,
filled him till brim, and then came while having their foreheads pressed together.

Jeongguk wrapped his arms around Taehyung's neck and wanted this to remain for a while, the
intimacy, the closeness, the warmth. Taehyung breathing heavily, looking more pleased than ever.
He kissed Jeongguk's forehead and then pulled out of him, taking the condom and folding it into a
tissue to throw it into the bin.

Jeongguk looked at Taehyung lazily, and Taehyung smiled. He climbed onto the bed and lay down
beside him, looking at the younger.

"Did you enjoy that?"

"More than anything," Jeongguk whispered. "I-I didn't know you could do that to a man. I didn't
know it was possible to feel that much pleasure."

"Ah," Taehyung smiled. "I've got you trapped now, haven't I?"

Jeongguk giggled and then felt Taehyung wrap his arms around his waist while the younger
burrowed his head onto the man's chest.

"Could we do this again sometime, Taehyung?"

"Of course we can, my love."

**
 Chapter 9

**

Jeongguk stirred his eyes open and felt his breath tingle with the bare chest in front of him. He
looked up and felt the racing of his heartbeat fasten at the sight of Taehyung asleep. Jeongguk
moved closer up to him, placing his nose in the man's neck, taking in his earthy scent.

Taehyung hummed in his sleep and opened his eyes, seeing Jeongguk looking up at him. Taehyung
looked behind Jungkook, and his eyebrows furrowed.

"Fuck." Taehyung let out and then sat up in an instant, feeling groggy and light headed. His voice
was deep, husky. "I've completely forgotten I've got work," Taehyung said in a tired voice, and
Jeongguk put his hand on Taehyung's shoulder.

Jeongguk looked at him mystically. "Last night was really wonderful, Taehyung," Jeongguk said
softly, and Taehyung turned and looked at him. "You were amazing, I-"

"You should really get going," Taehyung stated, and Jeongguk saw him put his pants and trousers
back on, ruffling his blonde hair. "Veronica could come home anytime."

Jeongguk paused for a bit and then nodded. "Yes- um- yes of course. I'll just-" Jeongguk
stammered, and then looked at Taehyung, who walked across the room to grab a white shirt and
put it on rather quickly.

Jeongguk got out of bed, completely naked and limping a bit, feeling his backside ache. Jeongguk
saw Taehyung button it up quickly and grab a tie, and Jeongguk reached closer to him and grabbed
his tie from either end.

"Let me help you," Jeongguk said, and Taehyung tensed, looking down at him. Jeongguk put his
tie together, putting it on over his shirt smoothly. Jeongguk could feel Taehyung's gaze and bit his
lip. "I was thinking- about last night.." Jeongguk trailed, and then put Taehyung's tie on. "Could we
do it again sometime? I-I mean- not, not now, of course. I mean, that'd be idiotic. I mean maybe
again if we've both got ample time, o-or-"

"Darling," Taehyung began, lifting Jeongguk's chin up. "Don't fret about the distant future. Let's
worry about the current." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk hummed and watched Taehyung walk
away.

Jeongguk found his clothes strewn around the room and quickly grabbed them and put them on,
watching Taehyung fix his hair and put on an expensive watch and put on a suit jacket. He took a
bit of water to slick his hair to the side and then looked at Jeongguk, who just had his shirt on.

"I've got to get to court, love. I'll see you later." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk put on his trousers
quickly and rushed closer to him.

"Can't I come along? Never really been to a court before- i-it'd be a learning for me!" Jeongguk
spoke fast, and Taehyung hummed, grabbing a briefcase from his desk and walking out of the
room. "Is- is that a yes?"
"No," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk bit the inside of his cheek. He didn't mean to anger Taehyung.
Maybe he should've left last night...

"A-alright," Jeongguk said, and then followed him down the stairs. "Won't you eat breakfast? I can
make you some- some eggs, or-"

"Jeongguk," Taehyung said softly, and Jeongguk walked closer to him at the mention of his name.
Taehyung tapped the underside of his chin. "Don't push it."

Jeongguk stilled for a few seconds and then watched Taehyung grab a coat. Jeongguk nodded, even
though he knew Taehyung couldn't see. Jeongguk grabbed his coat from the hanger as well, and
then saw the main door open, and Veronica stood on the other side.

"Ah, Jeongguk. You're with Taehyung. Again." Veronica stated, her hair falling down. Jeongguk
tensed.

"I was j-just-" Jeongguk began, but Taehyung chuckled.

"Veronica you frighten the poor boy. He came early morning to help with my court case. It's
always helpful to have another perspective on things," Taehyung smiled, and then grabbed his
coat. "I'll see you later," He said, kissed her cheek, and walked out of the house.

Jeongguk put his shoes on and grabbed his coat as well. He saw Veronica giving him a calculating
look, and put his coat on hurriedly to rush out of the house.

Jeongguk saw Taehyung walking to get his car, and hummed. "I'll see you later." Jeongguk voiced,
and Taehyung spared him a nod. Jeongguk beamed at that and turned around to walk back home.

Jeongguk reached his small flat and opened the door with a heavy heart. It didn't feel good, it didn't
feel right. He felt... wrong. No man should do this his wife. Jeongguk walked in and saw the dull
living room, and then found it empty.

"Rosie?" Jeongguk called out, but she wasn't at home. Jeongguk frowned. He took his coat off,
walking around the house. "Rosie?" Jeongguk called again, but then found she wasn't at home.
Where could she be? She rarely ever left...

Jeongguk sighed and walked around the house, feeling idle. He'd done all his work for school, and
he didn't feel like doing anything else today. Jeongguk didn't have a telly either, so there wasn't
anything to watch. He'd read all the books in their house. It was too cold to walk outside.

Jeongguk walked over to his radio and turned it on. The sound of Elvis filled his ears, and
Jeongguk hummed magically, taking a little spin. He felt a little intoxicated, maybe. He didn't
know what it was he wanted.

But in fact, he did. He wanted to be completely naked, walking around the house and listening to
Elvis and drinking cheap wine even though it was 9 am in the morning. He wanted to be untamed,
felt this uncultivated intensity pulsing through his body since last night. He felt overly
spontaneous.

He wanted Taehyung. Wanted Taehyung wrapping him in his arms and thrusting into him softly as
perfectly as he did the night before. Taehyung felt like a liquor dancing on his tongue, taking
control of each one of his senses and giving him some sort of enlightenment. Jeongguk wanted that;
wanted that touch, that feel, that-

But of course, Jeongguk did none of that. He sat on the couch and reread an old book, finding what
used to be thrilling rather boring now. Everything felt dreary after meeting Kim Taehyung.
Everything except him.

Taehyung was magnificent. Like a divine human from another realm altogether. He was so
different from anyone Jeongguk had ever met. Jeongguk would read ten books if they were about
Kim Taehyung.

Jeongguk spent the next hour reading, and then whined to himself and rolled off the bed. He
walked to the radio, changing the stations. He heard some trumpet music and then gasped. He
knew this song. It was Marilyn Monroe- everyone knew this song.

Jeongguk began singing and then took a little twirl in his living room, feeling his hair jump up with
him. "The French are glad to die for love, they delight in fighting duels~" Jeongguk sang, feeling
almost a peculiar mirth from the pain in his lower back.

"But I prefer a man who lives and gives expensive jewels~" Jeongguk sang, and then giggled and
skipped into his kitchen. He opened the cabinet above the stove and took out tea bags.

"A kiss on the hand may be quite continental-" Jeongguk continued and then moved to grab a
teacup. "But diamonds are a girl's best friend~" Jeongguk sang ecstatically, and then turned around
with a giggle, and froze.

"J-Jeongguk are you alright?" Rosie asked, eyes wide, stood in a coat outside the kitchen.

Jeongguk put the teacup down along with the teabags and gulped. "Y-yes- yes of course I'm- um-
I'm fine." Jeongguk stammered and then walked past her to turn off the radio.

Rosie giggled. "Why you were singing so well," Rosie said, and Jeongguk blushed slightly.

"Where- where were you?" Jeongguk asked, looking at her, trying to rid of the thoughts he had of
Taehyung.

Rosie looked down for a bit, and then looked at Jeongguk and smiled. "I thought a lot about what
you said, Jeongguk. About- about how I was wasting my time and making your life harder! It's not
your fault you can't pay for the both of us. It takes ages to become a lawyer, and-and you're
working so hard!" Rosie said, and then took a step towards him.

"So this morning, when you didn't come back, I-I got a little frightened, if I'm honest. So I rushed
down to the Nightingale Nursing School and I applied to study to become a nurse, Jeongguk."

Jeongguk paused. Rosie smiled. "Isn't that good? I won't be lazing around anymore! Plus- being a
nurse, it's a wonderful profession. And the lady at the school told me I won't have to study for too
long, I can start working for the smaller things in an instant." Rosie said, and Jeongguk grabbed her
hands.

"Oh, Rosie. That's... that's really great. I'm so happy." Jeongguk said and leaned forward to kiss her
cheek. Rosie smiled.

And at that moment Jeongguk felt terrible; absolutely terrible. Because the only thought in his
mind was the fact that now he'd get more time alone with Taehyung.

*
"Good for Rosie. My mum was a nurse. Worked day and night."

"I hope she isn't doing it just for me, though," Jeongguk said, gripping onto his books tightly. He
looked to his side and saw Jimin, who was leaning against the brick walls of the school, smoking a
cigarette.

Jimin had black hair, big eyes, and pink cheeks. Though he may look innocent at times, Jeongguk
knew he'd court as many ladies as possible and then leave them the very next day. It's something
Jeongguk never understood.

"We better get to this last lecture. My stupid shift at the pub starts in two hours. I'm dreading it."
Jimin grumbled, and Jeongguk and he began walking towards the class.

"I'll come to visit you again. If you let don't cut me off at 5 pints like last time."

"You can't handle your liquor-"

"I can handle my liquor-" Jeongguk snapped, and Jimin snickered, flicking his cigarette into the
bin. The two walked into the class and sat down in the middle as they usually do. The college was
98% men and consisted of a few hardworking women who didn't talk much, who lecturers never
let answer questions. Today, for some odd reason, there were an awful lot of women in the lecture
hall.

"Who's our lecturer today?" Jeongguk asked, and a girl from the front row turned her head. "Didn't
you hear? It's that charming young lawyer who wins all his cases!"

"Women go to his court cases just to watch him talk. He's fascinating." A girl giggled.

"Imagine a husband like that! Oh~ I'd simply go crazy." Another girl sighed.

Jeongguk frowned, but then saw the lecture hall doors open. His eyes widened when he saw Kim
Taehyung, wearing a black suit with his blonde hair framed around his face making him look more
handsome than usual.

Everyone in the room sat up a little bit or tried to look a little presentable at his entrance, while
Jeongguk's eyes grew bigger. Taehyung gave lectures at colleges?

"Good morning, King's college. It's lovely to be here," Taehyung smiled, and Jeongguk saw the girl
in front of him look entranced.

Taehyung looking at the students. There were many. His eyes moved around, and lastly, fell on
Jungkook. Jungkook tensed, but then saw Taehyung look away as if it was nothing.

"I'm here to talk about what confidence and demeanor mean for lawyers. Many of you will go to
court. Perhaps many of you won't." Taehyung spoke, hearing the silence as everyone in the large
lecture hall leaned forward to listen to his deeply vibrated words. "Now, many of you probably
know me. Does anyone know of the infamous case from 1957?" Taehyung asked with a little
smirk, hands in his pockets.

A boy put his hand up. Taehyung gestured at him. "The case against Jerad Hunnington, for murder
and assault."

"Yes, yes that one. I was 23 at the time, as old as some of you in this room. Because of the war I'd
finished college earlier thus finished law school earlier. The moment I got that case, you know
what my boss said to me?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk felt enchanted by his words but felt a
pang in his stomach because everyone else probably had the same reaction.

"He said the case is a goner. Pro bono. I had to do it for company's namesake and all that crap."
Taehyung snickered, and everyone giggled. "I took it. Practically no evidence, a shaky witness, and
a young widow who didn't have much to say. The judge almost laughed when I walked in with the
case," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk felt his hands pucker up.

"I thought to myself then. Why did I become a lawyer? Does anyone want to wonder why?"
Taehyung asked, amused. Some students put their hands up.

"I-it's a lot of money," One said, and Taehyung chuckled.

"Then wouldn't we all be prostitutes? Who else?" Taehyung asked, hearing the class laugh. He
pointed at a girl, who looked timid.

"Because lawyers are the advocates of justice." She spoke quietly, and Jeongguk saw Taehyung
take a step towards her. He smiled, that awfully handsome smile he'd given Jeongguk when he first
saw him.

"Yes. That exactly. What's your name, darling?" Taehyung asked in a hushed tone, and Jeongguk's
eyes widened.

"J-Joanne," She squeaked out, blushing. Taehyung nodded at her with a smile and then turned
around to walk back to the front of the class. Jeongguk saw the girl cover her face with her hands,
and some of the other students look envious.

"So I went up with one paper in my hand, some muddled up notes in my head, and words scribbled
onto my hand- and the moment I looked the jury in the eyes, I forgot every word on that paper. I
spoke- I spoke and spoke and talked with vigor. Being a lawyer means you need to have the
essence, the skill, the quality. Don't be afraid, all of you will get it sooner or later." Taehyung said,
leaning against the table.

"What happened to that case, sir?" One of the girls asked.

"Good question. I won." Taehyung grinned. "He's in prison for 30 years. He let out everything on
the stand when I asked him four or five questions. And for me? Well, the next day I got promoted."
Taehyung chuckled, and Jeongguk heard Jimin snicker beside him.

"This man is god-damn full of himself," Jimin said, and Jeongguk looked at him. "But look how
confident he is. It's clearly working. All the girls seem in love."

"Now, does anyone remember the Holden-Smith court case from 1934?" Taehyung asked, leaning
against the table casually. Everyone put their hand up.

Literally everyone, except Jeongguk. He was entrapped in Taehyung's every move, every stance,
every word. He couldn't believe he was here. It felt strange, seeing him like this. Felt strange. Felt
like he was watching him from a third eye.

Taehyung looked around and then dropped his eyes on Jeongguk, who was the only one sitting,
almost trying to hide. Jeongguk couldn't think- nothing came to mind.

"Didn't you learn this in your first year here?" Taehyung asked, and everyone nodded, wanting to
answer the question, wanted to impress him. But Jeongguk got absolutely nothing in his mind, and
he tried, tried his hardest to think of anything-

"You," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk saw Taehyung looking directly at him with a small knowing
look. "Describe the case."

Jeongguk blushed. He looked at Taehyung strangely, as if hoping the man would let him go.
Jeongguk was quiet for a while. Taehyung sighed. "I haven't got all day, y'know," Taehyung said,
and the girls giggled.

Jeongguk looked down with his big eyes, toying with his fingers. "I- um- I d-don't know,"
Jeongguk whispered.

"Speak up," Taehyung ordered, and Jeongguk found the class looking at him, Jimin giving him an
odd look because Jeongguk always knew the answers.

"I d-don't know, sir," Jeongguk said louder, and then saw Taehyung let out a dramatic sigh, tsking.

"How disappointing," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk looked at him. Taehyung looked amused.
Jeongguk felt like crying.

"Who else wishes to answer?" Taehyung continued, and asked one of the other students, while
Jeongguk felt stupid. Stupid because Taehyung made him feel so inferior.

After another 45 minutes, the lecture was over and safely said, almost all the people in the room
were charmed by him. Jimin kept talking about how he wants to be like him in a few years.
Jeongguk kept quiet.

Everyone began walking out. Jimin rushed out for he had his work at the pub. Jeongguk saw young
ladies surrounding Taehyung around the desk, him chuckling at their words and making all of them
blush and squirm.

"Are you married, Mr. Kim?" One girl asked, playing with the bottom of her hair.

"I am married, ladies. I apologize," Taehyung chuckled softly as if he's asked that question a lot.
The girls let out sighs of despair, looking upset or crushed. Jeongguk saw the girls say their
lengthy goodbyes and walk out, and Taehyung even saw him kiss one or two of their hands.

Once they were all gone, it was only Jeongguk and Taehyung left in the hall. "Y-you didn't tell me
you gave lectures here."

"I didn't. It's my first time." Taehyung said, folding up a piece of paper and putting it into his
pocket.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Jeongguk asked, and Taehyung chuckled. "You didn't ask."

"I-It's probably because you haven't talked to me for a week. I was... hoping you'd call or write to
me." Jeongguk said softly, and Taehyung walked closer to him. Jeongguk saw him walking closer
and gulped, nervousness washing over him.

"A-and why'd you mock me in class like that? I-it was awfully humiliating. You needn't be so
mean, you know. It- it was mean." Jeongguk stammered because Taehyung kept quiet and only
walked closer. Jeongguk felt his walls breaking down. "P-plus y-you were flirting w-with all these
women, a-and-"

Taehyung towered over him. He looked down at Jeongguk, having cornered him into the desk.
Jeongguk looked up at him.

"Why'd you stop talking?" Taehyung asked softly, and Jeongguk looked up at him with glimmering
eyes, feeling himself break.

Jeongguk dropped his books to the ground and wrap his arms around Taehyung quickly, pressing
their lips together. Taehyung chuckled into his mouth, kissing him back. Jeongguk reached his
hands down his shoulders and to his hands, and grabbed them and placed them on his waist.

Taehyung pulled away, and Jeongguk was breathless. "You shouldn't be so frivolous in public,
Jeongguk. How thoughtless of you." Taehyung spoke, looking down at Jeongguk.

Jeongguk put his head onto Taehyung's chest, and Taehyung sighed, patting his back. "Oh, little
one. What's wrong?"

"You. You're what's wrong." Jeongguk mumbled, toying with the button of Taehyung's suit jacket.
"You're being unkind to me."

"I would never do such a thing," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk looked up at him, biting his bottom
lip. Jeongguk leaned up, brushing their noses together and begging for a kiss. Taehyung felt
Jeongguk try to press their lips together and sighed, pulling Jeongguk back from the back of his
head.

"You're being childish, pretty." Taehyung tsked, and Jeongguk trailed his hand up Taehyung's
shirt.

"I just-" Jeongguk began and gripped Taehyung's shirt. "Rosie's not at home much anymore. She's
gotten busy with her new nursing job. You can come to my flat," Jeongguk spoke fast, fast before
Taehyung could possibly dismiss him. "Come to my flat and- and we can have sex again, we can-"

"Jeongguk," Taehyung said softly, and Jeongguk continued.

"You can fuck me. I'll wear nothing but the apron. I promise. I want you to- to be inside me again."
Jeongguk begged, eyes big. "Don't you want to as well?"

"I'd want nothing more," Taehyung whispered, and Jeongguk smiled. "But you realize I have a job.
So do you. I'm busy, darling. I know I told you we could have sex numerous times, but I forgot.
Forgot about the amount of work I have, I-" Taehyung began, and Jeongguk kissed him.

Taehyung squeezed him with his grasp, kissing him back. Taehyung pulled away, and Jeongguk
brushed their noses. "I'll make you feel better, Taehyungie. Let you fuck me twice, I will."
Jeongguk said, and Taehyung grinned.

"How on earth can a man resist that?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk giggled, feeling Taehyung
kiss his cheek softly.

**
 Chapter 10
Chapter Notes

hi guys! thank u sm for the lovely comments, i appreciate it very much!

this chapter includes a small part where the ~smut~ might seem like there's been lack
of communication / no discussion of consent. but it is consensual! ok now i hope u like
it!

**

The dark wooden door closed behind Taehyung, creating a silenced heavy sound throughout the
flat. Taehyung stepped inside, the soles of his shoes carrying bits of snow.

"This is... your house?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk looked around to ensure Rosie wasn't there,
running into their bedroom, study, kitchen, bathroom- and finding it all empty.

"Yeah," Jeongguk said, and then took his coat off, chucking it onto the sofa carelessly. He looked
at Taehyung. "Rosie's not here."

"Shame," Taehyung said, looking around peculiarly. "How come?"

"She's in nursing school or-or something," Jeongguk let out breathlessly, and before Taehyung
could move an inch, Jeongguk fastened the pace of his feet towards Taehyung and gripped his
collar tightly, pressing their lips together.

Taehyung kissed him back, and then pulled away, seemingly abstaining. "Have you got any tea?"

Jeongguk looked up at Taehyung. "Hm? Tea? Yeah, yeah I can make some tea," Jeongguk
whispered and began kissing Taehyung again.

Taehyung moved their lips together for a few seconds and then pulled away. Jeongguk leaned back
up, and then Taehyung turned around. "So. Rosie's joined nursing sch-"

"What's wrong?" Jeongguk asked, feeling his insides falter. "Why won't you kiss me? D-did I do
something wrong?"

"Hm?" Taehyung asked, looking at him for a few seconds. Taehyung shook his head. "It's just
that," Taehyung began, and then collected himself calmly, looking distant. "I don't actively enjoy
such adhesive behavior,"

Jeongguk stilled, eyes wide. Taehyung was so blunt, Jeongguk felt his insides tremble. "A-adhesive
behavior?" Jeongguk began in confusion, and then looked down.

"I'm being rather..." Jeongguk began and then toyed with his fingers, feeling a sudden awareness of
his actions. "D-desperate, aren't I? Acting all frantic," Jeongguk gulped, and then looked up at
Taehyung, who hummed.
"Didn't expect you to be so," Taehyung chuckled, and Jeongguk blushed anxiousness heightening.

"I-I apologize. I didn't mean to d-discomfort you." Jeongguk said softly, continuing to look down.
"I j-just... I liked when you had sex with me- It's so different from anything I've ever experienced,
ever imagined." Jeongguk went on and then paused.

Taehyung chuckled. "That's alright, love," Taehyung said, and then looked at Jeongguk. "I hear
that from all the women I sleep with,"

Jeongguk froze. "A-all the women?" Jeongguk asked, discomposed by his words.

"Of course," Taehyung said, and then took out a cigarette from his pocket, along with a lighter.
"You didn't think I slept with just a few women, did you?" Taehyung asked, putting the cigarette
between his lips and lighting the fire, pressing it gently to the bud of the stick.

Jeongguk opened his mouth, yet no words came out. "I-I didn't think you slept with any."

"You're good-humored, Jeongguk." Taehyung chuckled, putting the lighter back in his pocket and
then smoking a drag with the cigarette. "Well, no. Sex is one of the most pleasurable things in life.
Why only do it with one?"

Jeongguk looked down. "R-right." Jeongguk chuckled softly, feeling staggered.

"I do pray you're not angered, Jeongguk. Why, it's rather fun, really." Taehyung snickered.

"Does- does Veronica know?"

"She knows enough." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk clenched his fist to himself, not being able to
look up at Taehyung.

"Y-you're quiet the w-womaniser, are you?" Jeongguk asked in a quiet voice, and then saw
footsteps approach him, and then felt his chin get lifted up, and looked into Taehyung's dark eyes.

"Temptation forgoes the like of many. I happen to be one," Taehyung whispered, and Jeongguk
gulped.

Jeongguk nodded. Taehyung reached down and pressed his lips gingerly against Jeongguk's, not
fully pressing them together, yet just enough for Jeongguk to forget every word of Taehyung's and
just want more.

Taehyung pulled away, and Jeongguk whimpered out. "I must go now, angel," Taehyung
whispered. "But I'll think of you,"

Jeongguk nodded softly, gripping onto Taehyung's coat and hoping he'd stay. Taehyung turned
around to walk away, and Jeongguk just watched him leave.

Jeongguk sat down on his couch, bringing his knees to his chest. Oh. Taehyung was handsome.
Oh, so handsome. Jeongguk wishes he weren't so handsome. Wishes he weren't so- so dashing, so
charming, so perfect.

Taehyung seemed so fucking perfect.

Jeongguk could've laughed. Of course he slept around. He's got a beautiful wife and the most
beautiful face. Women swoon over him for simply walking into a room. Jeongguk was nothing.

Taehyung's aura shakened Jeongguk to the core. He was so intimidating, his gaze, his words, his
words. Everything about him was intimidating, and Jeongguk felt smaller than ever.

Rosie came home later, but she looked tired. She kissed Jeongguk on the forehead and tilted her
head at how Jeongguk was cooped up in the corner of the sofa, knees to his chest, hearing the
radio.

"What's wrong?" Rosie asked, and Jeongguk placed his head against the sofa.

"I don't wish to talk about it," Jeongguk said, and then continued looking down, his feet cold.

Rosie hummed. "Oh, well. I saw this advert on this store which was selling tellies. Perhaps we
should get one. We could put it in the living room. It'd really liven the place up-."

Jeongguk whined, pressing his face against the sofa. "We haven't got the money for a telly, Rosie,"
Jeongguk mumbled, angrily pouting while staring into the wall.

Rosie looked at him for a few seconds. "You act rather maidenly at times," Rosie giggled, and
Jeongguk looked up at her. Rosie saw the look on Jeongguk's face and then gulped. "I-I'm only
joking. Sorry. I'll make supper."

Jeongguk watched her walk away and then sighed, getting up and walking towards his study.
Couldn't bear thinking of Taehyung and how absolutely perfect he was.

"Where were you?" Veronica asked as Taehyung walked into their home.

"I was with Jeongguk. Do you know how small their flat is? Remember when we lived in one of
those? God- feels abysmal now." Taehyung said, taking his coat off and hanging it onto the rack.

"Why're you always with Jeongguk?" Veronica asked, dressed in a pencil skirt and maroon top,
hair in a bun as she stared at Taehyung with a raised brow.

Taehyung walked past her, finding a bottle of wine perched on the dining table along with a glass.
"He's good-natured."

"Everyone's good-natured." Veronica spat. Taehyung chuckled. "You don't know half the world,
darling."

"Shut up, Taehyung," Veronica said, and Taehyung looked at her. "Are you really upset with me
again? What for now?"

Veronica walked up to him. "If you think I don't know what you're doing by getting
so friendly with Jeongguk, then you're wrong."

Taehyung paused. He looked at her for a few seconds and then smirked. "You're being delirious,"

Veronica looked closely at him. "You think I'm stupid," She grinned. "You think I don't know,
Taehyung. I do, I know a lot, I know-"

"Shush, darling," Taehyung whispered, wrapping his arms around her waist. "Being so,
so angered all the time can cause anxiety," Taehyung said, wringing his hands into his waist.

"Taehyung," She began, but Taehyung leaned forward, breathing over her red lips.

"You sound so confident and strong, Veronica. I know you don't like it when I outwit you,"
Taehyung whispered.

Veronica looked up at him. Being his wife for more than 8 years, and yet Taehyung was still as
magnetizing as when they first met. Veronica pressed their lips together.

Taehyung kissed her back lightly, and before he could pull away, Veronica kissed him harder.
Taehyung chuckled into her mouth, pulling away from her. "You know I don't like adhesive
behavior, love."

Veronica's cheeks reddened. "Don't talk to me like that. I'm not one of your whores you shove your
cock into." Veronica said lowly, regaining her dominance.

Taehyung chuckled. "Of course you're not," Taehyung whispered, and reached his hands down and
picked her up. She kissed him firmly as he carried her up the stairs.

They continued kissing as they entered the bedroom. Taehyung placed Veronica onto the bed and
climbed atop her, kissing her neck. The moment they did, Veronica flipped them over and
straddled him.

Taehyung kept quiet and watched as Veronica clamped her fingers into Taehyung's blonde hair and
pulled his head up. "Think you're clever, don't you? Fucking all these tramps behind my back-"

"I don't think your aunt would appreciate being referred to as a tramp," Taehyung whispered and
then felt a pull to his hair.

"I detest you," Veronica whispered, and cupped his cheeks and began kissing him firmly again.
"Who was the last person on this bed beside me?"

"No one," Taehyung said and got pushed down, Veronica atop of him, grinding softly against his
clothed cock.

"Don't lie to me, I saw the condom."

Taehyung dug his teeth into his bottom lip. "Veronica-"

Taehyung felt her sharp nails dig into his neck and craned his head back. Taehyung chuckled,
looking up with his darkened eyes. "I've told you I don't enjoy this,"

"And I've told you I don't care," Taehyung looked at her piercingly. She smirked. "You know you
don't get your way in here, little one."

"Shut up," Taehyung gritted, and they began kissing again.

Ages later, after Veronica rode his cock and Taehyung grunted and rolled his hips and came into
her- she pulled off and walked towards the bathroom. Taehyung saw the cum dripping down her
leg and breathed heavily, gripping onto the bed sheets.

"What are you-"

"I've got to make sure I don't get pregnant," Veronica snapped, and Taehyung inhaled sharply and
lay down on the bed, closing his eyes.

Ages later, when he was asleep, he felt fingers tickle down his shoulder. "If what I think is
happening is really happening, Taehyung;" Veronica whispered into his ear. "I won't take it lightly
at all. Know your limits,"
Taehyung kept quiet, eyes opened. She lay down on the bed, both facing the other way.

Jeongguk saw Rosie walk into their flat. "Don't worry about dinner tonight, honey! Veronica's
invited us for dinner!"

"She has?" Jeongguk asked, and Rosie hummed.

"Well, really she just invited me- but I'm sure you can come as well." Rosie smiled, and Jeongguk
hummed.

"I-I think it's best if I don't," Jeongguk said, and Rosie shook her head.

"No! You must come with! And, Taehyung will be there. Veronica told me the two of you've
gotten really friendly lately." Rosie said excitedly, and Jeongguk stilled.

"Alright. I'm sure it'll be alright." Jeongguk said softly.

Jeongguk got dressed up in a nice yellow shirt and a pair of trousers. Rosie went into the washroom
to change. While she did, Jeongguk eyed the dressing table she owned.

Jeongguk walked towards him carefully. He hesitantly picked up a lipstick, a pink one. The
washroom door was sealed shut. Rosie wouldn't see.

Jeongguk slid the tip of the pink lipstick against his finger and then tapped it onto his lips.
Jeongguk spread it evenly and then saw his lips looking plumper and brighter. He smiled.

Rosie walked out dressed in a pink dress. She saw Jeongguk and gave him a warm glance. They
both grabbed their coats and then headed towards the mansion.

They walked fifteen minutes or so and finally reached the house. Rosie went ahead and knocked on
the door brightly. The door opened, and Jeongguk hesitated when he saw Taehyung.

"Ah, Rosie," Taehyung smiled, and Rosie looked a little surprised- expecting to see Veronica.
Rosie smiled. "O-oh! Hello! Good evening," Rosie said.

"Good evening. Why you look lovely." Taehyung said, and Rosie gave him a soft smile.

Rosie walked into their home, and Jeongguk followed behind. He saw Taehyung there holding a
glass of whiskey and just looked away.

"What on earth are those clad to your legs?" Taehyung asked with a scoff.

Jeongguk looked down. He blushed lightly. "T-they're called jeans!" Jeongguk stammered, and
Taehyung rose his eyebrow. "Why t-they're the latest fashion. Everyone wears them these days,"

"Hm," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk walked in behind him. Both saw Veronica and Rosie hugging,
and Veronica saw Jeongguk and gave him a look. Jeongguk grew confused.

"Did you hear? Rosie's going to nursing school," Veronica said, and Rosie blushed lightly.
Taehyung chuckled.

"Of course I did," Taehyung said, walking over to Rosie. "You know, I've always thought it's
commendable, what nurses do. Absolute hard work and patience, it is. And I'm sure you'll be
marvelous." Taehyung said softly, giving her a smile.
Rosie blushed deeply and then giggled a little. "W-why- thank you!" Rosie squeaked out.

Veronica looked at the two of them and then smiled. "Well then. Dinner's ready. I'm just about
famished," Veronica said, and Jeongguk nodded.

Rosie gasped. "Oh! Jeongguk's got his first court trial coming up next week!"

"It's a mock trial, Rosie." Jeongguk stammered. "I-it's just for an exam,"

"I could help you," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk looked at him for a few seconds.

Veronica cleared her throat. "You know what I forgot to get? The wine," Veronica chuckled.
"Could you help me with it," Veronica began, and then clicked her tongue. "Jeongguk?"

"M-me?" Jeongguk asked, confused. She nodded. Jeongguk looked at Rosie and Taehyung, and
then at Veronica. "A-alright."

Jeongguk saw Veronica turn around and walk towards the wine cooler, and followed her to it.
When they reached the curve in the hallway where a bathroom and wine cooler was, Jeongguk felt
himself get grabbed and pulled into the hallway.

"You know what's going on as much as I do," Veronica irked, and Jeongguk froze.

"W-what?" Jeongguk asked, heart, beginning to hammer in his chest. "I- I don't-"

"Shut it." Veronica snapped. "You've spent quite some time with Taehyung for the past month,
haven't you? Don't you know him well enough?"

"I- um- I do. H-he's a friend. A good-natured man-" Jeongguk began, and Veronica chuckled.

"Do you not know him at all?" Veronica asked. "There's only one possible reason for his sudden
friendship for you,"

"A-and what is that?" Jeongguk asked, mouth dry. Veronica turned Jeongguk around so he was
peering into the living room.

"Isn't it clear as day?" Veronica said sharply, and Jeongguk froze.

"See, Rosie- alcohol isn't about the taste. It's about the sensation." Taehyung said to her slowly,
and Rosie looked up at him with big eyes. "It's drunken for the pleasure, not the flavor." Taehyung
continued.

"O-oh, that's... that's quite insightful." Rosie squeaked out, and Taehyung hummed, looking at her
closely. Jeongguk watched as he put one blonde strand of her hair behind her ear.

"You know, Rosie. You remind me of film actresses," Taehyung said in a hushed tone, looking
down at her. Rosie gulped, wavering.

"R-really?" Rosie asked, and then felt her hand get grabbed.

"Of course. Although, you might be too beautiful to be one," Taehyung said with a sly smirk, and
Rosie blushed very deep and began giggling like a young girl when he kissed her hand.

"O-oh." Jeongguk let out, not knowing how to take this, eyes wide.

Veronica turned Jeongguk around again. "He's only getting close to you so he can fuck your wife,"
Veronica snarked, and Jeongguk frowned.

"D-don't speak so crudely," Jeongguk said, gulping. "Rosie wouldn't-"

"I know Rosie wouldn't, you idiot." Veronica sneered. "But Taehyung will. I know my husband."

"You... you know he sleeps around?" Jeongguk asked, and Veronica snickered.

"Better than anyone else," Veronica mumbled, and Jeongguk was confused, but then turned back
around and looked at Taehyung and Rosie.

"See, Jeongguk. Taehyung has this effect on people. Anyone, frankly." Veronica said. "My own
aunt looked like she'd drop her knickers for him."

Jeongguk gulped dryly. "I wouldn't keep him too close if I were you," Veronica said, and then
walked towards Rosie and Taehyung.

"Rosie, come with me to get the food here," Veronica said, and Rosie nodded, snapping out of her
trance and following her inside the kitchen.

"I-I don't mean to sound... fatuous..." Rosie trailed. "But your husband is ever so mesmerizing. I'm
not sure I understood a word he said, yet... I couldn't stop listening."

"Taehyung does that," Veronica said flatly, and Rosie hummed, smiling to herself.

Jeongguk walked up to Taehyung. He didn't know what to say. Taehyung looked at him for a few
seconds, and then rose his eyebrow. "You're looking rather glum,"

"Do you have an affinity for seduction?" Jeongguk asked, and Taehyung looked amused by the
statement.

"Sorry?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk took a deep breath. "Y-you're rather flirtatious
with everyone. Why- why is it?" Jeongguk asked, and Taehyung chuckled.

"It's rather fun, isn't it Jeongguk? Women melt when you talk to them like-"

"I-I'm not a woman," Jeongguk stammered, looking up at him. "You still talked to me strangely.
Why is that?"

"You-" Taehyung began, and then sighed. "I simply like watching people squirm from my words,
Jeongguk. It's like a hobby if you will-"

"A hobby??" Jeongguk asked, frowning. "Flirting with my wife is a hobby? What were you trying
to do, sleep with her? Because Veronica sure thought-"

Taehyung stepped closer to him. "Woah there, Jeongguk. I might've been flirting with her, but it's
still her husband I fucked." Taehyung rasped lowly, and Jeongguk froze.

"T-Taehyung," Jeongguk began, and then looked up at Taehyung. "Why- why is it that you're so-
so-" Jeongguk began, and then let out a sigh. "So immaculate?"

Taehyung stilled. "Why can't y-you just-" Jeongguk tried forming sentences, taking a deep breath.
"Be- be less flawless? Be less perfect!"

"What's wrong, Jeongguk?" Taehyung asked. Before Jeongguk could speak, Taehyung hurriedly
took Jeongguk's hand in his and dragged him out of the living room and towards the wine cooler.
Taehyung opened the door and both of them stepped inside.

"T-Taehyung I didn't know y-you slept around," Jeongguk let out, eyes filling with tears. "If I did I
would've never- I would've never let you do what you did to me-"

"Hey, hey darling, don't cry," Taehyung said softly, putting his hands on his waist. "Look- I-I had
sex with you because I wanted to-"

"No! No, you didn't! You had sex with me because you wanted a challenge! Because you can get
any woman in the world, but you wanted to see if you could get a foolish boy like me," Jeongguk
said, and then felt a tear roll down his cheek.

Taehyung didn't speak. "And it's wrong! It's wrong! What we're doing i-isn't just infidelity it's- it's
sinful and we're going to go to hell!" Jeongguk cursed, and then put his hand over his eyes, trying
to stop his tears.

"Jeongguk," Taehyung began lightly, and Jeongguk shook his head.

"I-I wish you told m-me you were this horrible, horrible man who-who treats his wife so poorly
and wishes to have sex with every woman who walks." Jeongguk snapped. "A-and I wish you t-
told me you only fucked me because y-you couldn't fuck my wife," Jeongguk ended.

"J-Jeongguk-" Taehyung tried again, trying to grab his arm. Jeongguk pulled his arm away, wiping
his tears and walking out of the wine cooler.

Taehyung saw the door slam shut, and put his hand onto the door, his breathing going heavy.
Taehyung gulped, trying to steady himself, trying to regain his composure-

The door reopened, and Taehyung saw Veronica standing there. "You do this," Veronica sighed,
sounding irked. "You always do this. I don't care who you sleep with, Taehyung," Veronica said,
and then stepped closer.

"But if you even try and think about touching Rosie, I'll hurt you. Understood?" Veronica growled,
and Taehyung saw her, his heart beating faster.

"I said did you get that?" Veronica snapped, and Taehyung felt his vision going blurry.

Jeongguk walked up to them and watched with confusion as Taehyung put his hand on his heart,
gripping onto the doorframe tightly, fingers turning blue. "I-I-" Taehyung began, voice sounding
dry.

"T-Taehyung?" Jeongguk asked, and then saw Taehyung step forward and fall to the ground.

Jeongguk's eyes widened and he reached down, grabbing him by the sides. "O-oh my god- T-Tae?
What's wrong?" Jeongguk asked, and felt his entire body trembling.

He looked dizzy, breathing short, heavy, his hand continuing to press against his chest, eyes closed,
sweating, looking like he was in pain, in deep pain. Taehyung felt like he was losing-
losing control, losing his senses, losing-

"I-I think he's having a heart attack- V-Veronica call the ambulance!" Rosie said frantically, and
Veronica's eyes were wide in fear. Rosie frowned when Veronica didn't do anything. "Veronica!!"

Veronica nodded faintly and then rushed towards the telephone. Jeongguk held onto Taehyung,
who was gripping onto Jeongguk's shirt now, head pressed to the crevice of his neck.
"B-breathe, breathe for me, Tae-" Jeongguk stammered, and Taehyung fumbled around his shirt,
breathing unstable and shaky.

"C-can't-" Taehyung choked out, and Rosie put her hand on his shoulder.

"Don't worry. It's alright, stay calm." Rosie said softly, and Taehyung tried controlling his
breathing, but felt like he was choking, felt no words leaving his mouth, not being able to control
himself.

Rosie ran to grab a washcloth, and Jeongguk held onto Taehyung. "T-Tae- you're fine, y-you're
absolutely fine-" Jeongguk whispered and felt teardrops fall onto his neck.

Jeongguk held onto him for a little while longer, holding him tightly with a tightening fear in his
chest, the older man letting out sounds of pain. Finally, Veronica ran into the living room. "T-the
ambulance is here-"

Jeongguk picked Taehyung up, the man who'd always been so intimidating and piercing now
feeling light and looking fragile. Jeongguk rushed outside the house and saw the ambulance.

The doctors took it from there, and Jeongguk saw them take him into the ambulance. Veronica
went with them. Jeongguk and Rosie couldn't since only family members were allowed.

"L-let's go to the hospital. I think we should. Veronica looked really shocked." Rosie said softly,
and Jeongguk nodded. He felt absolute anxiousness in his insides because he didn't want Taehyung
to be hurt.

**
 Chapter 11

**

There are some people in the world who are perfect.

One look at them, and they draw you in. They've got beauty, skill, talent, and beautiful smiles and
catching eyes. You can't comprehend how they exist, how they can exist with no flaws. You're so
far in that you're convinced they've got null problems- their existence is simply beyond yours.

Jeongguk felt that way about Taehyung.

Inferiority was one thing. Jeongguk was simple, wore the same coat 7 days a week and worked at a
minimum pay job. His hair was simply brushed, his attitude was simple, everything about him
was... ordinary. Jeongguk went 23 years of his life feeling ordinary.

Taehyung wasn't ordinary.

He was grand. Dripping with luxury, wealth, exuding an aristocracy which made you want to
become him, yet want to be with him. His shoulders were wide, head held high, tall in his stature
and confident in his demeanor. His words were elegant, smooth, rolled off his tongue without a
thought, a doubt. It's as if he wasn't human at all, so far above anyone else- so perfect.

It scared Jeongguk. But now, peering in through wooden doors and seeing the blonde haired man
lay on his back, eyes closed, looking weak and smaller than Jeongguk had ever seen him-
Jeongguk's perception changed.

Veronica was inside the room with a few doctors, discussing something quietly. Veronica looked
scared, eyes a little wide. Jeongguk hoped Taehyung was alright. Rosie had left half an hour ago
because she had work early the next day and had to go sleep. Jeongguk decided to stay, forget
about his body's need for sleep. Taehyung felt of more importance.

"Thank you." Veronica said softly, and then reached for the door and walked out. She saw
Jeongguk and looked agitated. "Why're you still here?"

"I just wish to know if he's alright, that's all." Jeongguk said softly and saw Veronica take a
cigarette out, lighting it her other hand and then letting out smoke from her faded tinted lips.

"I don't know." Veronica mumbled, less taut than usual. Looking nervous- Jeongguk had never
seen her nervous before. Veronica also seemed to be perfect in a way. "It- it wasn't a heart attack,
thank goodness."

"What was it?" Jeongguk asked, and Veronica sighed. "A panic attack. Can you imagine? It's so
stupid," Veronica grumbled, taking in another smoke. "I was scared he'd gotten hurt or something
worse- but it's his stupid nerves being erratic." Veronica said, and Jeongguk saw her walk away.

"Panic attack? Why, w-what for? Taehyung seems so..." Jeongguk trailed and then paused.
Veronica chuckled, running a hand through her dark hair. "If he wakes, do call me."

Jeongguk saw her walk away and then sat down on one of the seats outside. A nurse walked past
him and then sighed. "You should really be gettin' home, dear. This is no place for a young man
like you to spend his night!"

"My-my friend is in there. I just need to ensure he's okay." Jeongguk said softly. The woman
smiled. "Don't worry, dear. I'll tell him when he's up. You should go home and get some rest."

"I'm alright. I find it more comforting to stay," Jeongguk said, and then saw the doctors walk out.
"Oh- um- is- is he okay?" Jeongguk asked, getting up.

"He's alright. It happens to many men! It's overworking, really. Ever since the depression they've
given one man the job of ten. No wonder men are getting a little anxious. But you needn't worry,
he'll be up by morning." The doctor chuckled. "Is his wife here?"

"She- she left, I think," Jeongguk said. He saw the doctors nod, turning to walk away. "Can I spend
the night in there?" Jeongguk asked, and saw the doctors hum and nod. Jeongguk smiled and
walked into the room, seeing Taehyung.

"Hello," Jeongguk whispered and then walked closer to him. "I was scared I was the reason you
relapsed. Seems like it was just your work," Jeongguk said, and then gulped, seeing how he was
sleeping. Of course, he couldn't hear, but Jeongguk felt the need to continue. "Veronica left. Rosie
did too. I don't think you should be alone, I'll stay." Jeongguk said, and then saw an armchair in the
corner with a cushion on it.

Jeongguk leaned down, wanting to press a feathery kiss to his forehead- but it was far too risky as
there was an abundance of nurses and such outside the flimsy door. "I shouldn't have been so cross
with you," Jeongguk said, and then traced his fingers across Taehyung's arm. "I just- you're so
much better than me. I don't understand why-why you wanted to do anything to me in the first
place," Jeongguk chuckled lightly, and then gulped, biting his lip.

"You're- you're so beautiful, Taehyung. I don't want to fall for you. You're a man, and I'm a man.
Boundaries should be made firmer in matters like these. But- I-I can't help myself. You're just
so beautiful." Jeongguk said, and then looked at the man for a few more seconds.

"I understand. A man of your caliber sleeping around- it's strange how I didn't make such an
assumption before." Jeongguk sighed, turning around and walking over to the armchair. "Women
probably throw themselves onto you. I know I did," Jeongguk giggled to himself, and then sat
down, draping his feet over the side of the chair and leaning against the head of it. Jeongguk
looked at Taehyung for a few more seconds and then closed his eyes, drifting off.

Taehyung woke up, and his eyes felt blinded to the white fluorescent lights. The windows on the
side let in the sunlight, and it took a few seconds for him to adjust. His throat felt dry, very dry- and
his body felt weak. Taehyung looked around and realized he was in the hospital.

He sat up, feeling dizzy from just doing so, and then grabbed the sheets under his palms. The door
of the room he was in opened, and Taehyung saw a nurse- with short curly brown hair, wearing a
long white skirt and top like they do.

"Oh no no! Mr. Kim, you mustn't sit up like that! You're still unwell-" The woman gushed, rushing
up to him. Taehyung shook his head.
"I'm fine. I'm absolute-" Taehyung began, and then felt his mouth go dry. The woman grabbed a
glass and poured water into it from a jug laying on the table beside the hospital bed. She grabbed
Taehyung's chin gently and tried pressing the cup to his lips, but Taehyung grabbed the cup from
her hands.

"I can do it myself," Taehyung said lowly and then drank the water down. The woman nodded
wearily, and then took the cup back and placed it on the table. She opened the drawer and took a
medicine bottle. "Doctor's told you to take a dosage of these pills twice a day-"

Taehyung felt anger growing in him at those words and then looked at the nurse with annoyance.
"Where's Veronica?"

"Veronica? Do- do you mean your wife, sir? I saw her here earlier, but-but I'm not sure where she
is." The nurse said, and Taehyung looked to the side, and then froze when he saw Jeongguk.

The boy was curled up on the armchair, fists brought to his chest and close to his mouth- perhaps
from how cold he was. Taehyung felt himself calming from his presence and then brought his hand
out, where the woman placed a pill on his palm.

"How long has he been here?" Taehyung asked, and the nurse looked at Jeongguk. "Slept over. I
told him to leave- but he insisted on staying since your wife had to go home." The nurse said softly
and then looked at Taehyung.

Taehyung put the pill onto his tongue and then saw the woman trying to pour the water into his
mouth again- and grabbed the cup again- much to her dismay, and drank it down. He gulped down
the pill and then put the cup back on the table.

"Last night you had a-" The woman began, and Taehyung shook his head. "I don't wish to know.
I'm fine." Taehyung said the woman tilted her head.

"But Mr. Kim, you're-"

"I said I'm fine." Taehyung snapped, and the woman looked a little scared and nodded. "I-I
apologize. I must leave now, I think you have a visitor." She said softly and then turned around to
walk out of the room.

The room door opened, and Taehyung heard a loud cry. He looked, and almost groaned aloud. "O-
oh, Mr. Kim! You're- you're sick!" A voice came, and Taehyung saw his assistant from work, a
young girl called Natalie, rushing over to him, long auburn hair and big green eyes.

"I'm fine, Natalie. Really. You don't need to worry." Taehyung said and noticed how she wore her
top really low as usual around him, skirt lined to her backside, accentuating it. She walked over to
him, cradling his face.

"Oh, but I must. It'd be harrowing to work without you, Mr. Kim." She said, pouting a little.
Taehyung looked at her for a few seconds, and she looked back at him, and then leaned in and
pressed their lips together.

Taehyung pushed her off. "Natalie, please-"

"Oh come on, Mr. Kim. Your wife isn't here! No one's got to know," She whispered into his ear
and put her hand under the blanket draped over him, reaching to his crotch, smiling. "I've missed
you fucking me. Missed it so much. I liked how you did it last time. When you bent me over your
desk like that, Mr. Kim. I liked it a lot, I-"
"Natalie, seriously," Taehyung said lowly, slapping her hand away. "I'm in no state to do so. And
for fuck's sake- I thought you came here to check if I was alright?"

Natalie blinked her eyes. "Well if you're not going to fuck me- I might as well leave. I've got a free
day anyway, now that you're sick." She said, and then kissed his cheek and turned around to walk
away.

Taehyung sighed out, glancing down at his hands. He saw the door open again, the nurse from
before peering in. "Are you alright, Mr. Kim?" She asked hesitantly, and Taehyung looked down.
He didn't want to be rude.

"I'm alright," Taehyung said, and she walked up to him. Taehyung didn't want to make the nurse
think he was some sort of rude man who was ungrateful for their services. He wasn't- he just, he
just detested hospitals. The nurse smiled at him.

"That's good, that's good." She said, and then gulped. "Well, um- the doctor's instructed me to
inject you. I do apologize," She said, and Taehyung hit his head against the back wall.

"I really don't-" Taehyung began, but then felt the nurse put her hand on his arm, pushing his
sleeve up a bit. She looked at him closely. "Don't worry, Mr. Kim. I'll take care of you." She said
and then blinked her sleek eyes at him, lips hovering closer.

"I think you're rather handsome, Mr. Kim-" She whispered, and Taehyung looked at her and then
snickered. "You're aware I'm married?"

"I don't think your wife cares much, Mr. Kim." The nurse giggled. "Saw her having sex with one of
the doctors in the other room. If you want, I'll-"

Taehyung froze. He closed his eyes for a few seconds, mouth going dry. "Get out," Taehyung said
softly, and the nurse frowned, tilting her head.

"W-what? But- one of my friends who's worked closely with you told me you slept with almost
any-"

"Get out. Now." Taehyung growled at her, and she humphed at his unkind nature and then turned
around to walk out, closing the door rather harshly behind her.

Taehyung let his shoulders drop when she left and then felt his teeth sinking into his bottom lip,
hands coming up to press against his face. He felt it- the anxiety he'd felt the night before, the
uneasiness circling in the pit of his stomach. Not again, not again-

"Taehyung?" A soft voice arose, and Taehyung snapped out of his thoughts, moving his hands
from his face. He turned and saw Jeongguk looking at him, dazed. Jeongguk was frozen for a few
seconds and then stood up. "Taehyung! You're up!"

Jeongguk walked up to him rather hastily and saw Taehyung looked away. "I-I got so scared last
night, Taehyung! Thought- thought you'd fallen ill. But the doctors said-"

"I'm fine, Jeongguk. You can leave n-now." Taehyung let out, voice sounding
strained, stammering. Jeongguk paused, and then frowned, tilting his head.

"Taehyung what's wrong?" Jeongguk asked softly. Jeongguk looked at him closely, and then placed
his fingers under the man's chin and turned him, and felt his breath hitch when he saw tears in his
eyes.
"T-Taehyung? Why- don't cry, Taehyung." Jeongguk said in a gentle voice, looking at the tears in
the man's brown eyes. "No, no! You're-" Jeongguk began, and then reached forward, wrapping his
arms around him.

Taehyung felt his head press against Jeongguk's chest and sniffled, gripping onto his shirt.
Jeongguk brought his fingers down his hair. "There there, look- look you're alright."

Taehyung gripped Jeongguk's shirt tighter. "God, I-I'm so pathetic," Taehyung let out, and
Jeongguk scowled. "I-I've fallen sick, over a-a panic attack, of all things-"

"It's okay. It happens to everyone. It just means you work very hard, Taehyung." Jeongguk said
softly and then felt strange. Felt strange... comfort rising in his chest upon comforting Taehyung
like this.

Jeongguk didn't know if it was wrong to feel so- but he felt a little glad to see some... human-like
tendencies in the older man. To see him vulnerable, it was refreshing. Jeongguk didn't want him to
be sad, no- but it made him think that perhaps Taehyung wasn't perfect.

"They give me so much work, Gguk," Taehyung let out, hearing Jeongguk's heartbeat like a hum
against his ear. "I-I work day and night- never get an ounce of sleep- and- and on top of that,
Veronica's always in my ear a-about things. She treats me like I'm some sort of house dog, or-or-"
Taehyung rambled, and Jeongguk hummed, caressing his hair. Taehyung was letting go- letting go
of this demeanor he had. Jeongguk saw some reality in him.

"That doesn't make you feel good, does it? You like being in control of things, don't you
Taehyung?" Jeongguk asked softly, and Taehyung pulled away and looked up at him. "Is- is that
why you... sleep around so much? Because... you feel it like an escape? Like you've got control?"

Taehyung sniffled. "I-I don't know. Never thought about it like that. But perhaps, yes, that does
sound confoundingly accurate." Taehyung said, and then pulled away, scowling to himself.
Jeongguk sat down on his bed.

"I'm sorry about forcing myself onto you like that," Jeongguk said. "I understand if you don't want
me- nor want to sleep with me. I shouldn't have gotten so mad at you," Jeongguk said softly,
tracing his hand on the bedsheets. "I've just never been taken care of like that."

Taehyung chuckled. "No no, don't apologize. It's my fault, really. I led you on." Taehyung said,
and Jeongguk blushed lightly, biting his lip.

"I'm like a little lamb, aren't I? Got lured into the lion's den," Jeongguk giggled out, and Taehyung
smiled.

"I'm a lion, am I?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk looked up at him warmly. "Is it my luscious
mane?" Taehyung wiggled his eyebrows, and Jeongguk burst into laughter.

Taehyung smiled at him, and then looked down. "I-I don't like this. I don't like being so weak. I
feel like a burden upon everyone- I don't like feeling like a burden. Like I'm fragile like everyone
has to take care of me or somethin'." Taehyung mumbled, and Jeongguk hummed.

They hadn't really ever had a normal conversation like this, had they?

"Everyone's fragile, Taehyung. You're strong. You're- you're very strong. I see that. Everyone does.
But being a little fragile doesn't hurt from time to time." Jeongguk said and then smiled at him.

"I don't like being looked down upon," Taehyung said. Jeongguk giggled. "You're a strange man.
I'm not looking down upon you, Taehyung. I think you're so strong to go through that and be fine
after it." Jeongguk grinned. Taehyung chuckled, looking up at him.

"Aren't you disappointed? You must've thought I was some sort of... unwavering tough man who
doesn't have any problems." Taehyung said.

Jeongguk smiled softly. "I still think you're unwavering and tough," Jeongguk said. "I like that you
have problems. It makes you more believable. Until now, you felt like a dream. Now you feel like
reality."

Taehyung smiled at that. He hummed, looking down from Jeongguk's honey eyes. "I sort of keep a
wall up at all times, I presume. My boss must think I'm fine, that must be why he keeps giving me
so much work. I just- I can't do all of it. I've built up an image, I can't just fail, y'know? I can't walk
out of a courtroom defeated. I just can't." Taehyung said, and then gulped. "I've become sort of sex
symbol lawyer."

"I think that's badass," Jeongguk said, and Taehyung looked at him and laughed. Jeongguk giggled
and then hit his knee.

"You don't need to be a sex symbol lawyer, Taehyung! Nor some sort of perfect man that wins
every case! It isn't possible. Do you know what you need? You need a holiday, Taehyung. Now.
You need to take a week away from all your troubles." Jeongguk said.

Taehyung smirked, looking up. "Ah, yes. Alone in the wilderness. I've got a cabin in the south of
France. It's beautiful there. There are lakes and mountains. It's perfect." Taehyung said, looking at
Jeongguk.

"Go there! With Veronica. It'll be nice for you two." Jeongguk said, and Taehyung snickered,
looking away. "I don't think she'd like that. We'd keep fighting."

"Fighting? You two quarrel like normal couples, do you?" Jeongguk asked with wide eyes, and
Taehyung hummed. "Yes. Plus, I found out she had sex with that doctor who helped me,"
Taehyung said, and Jeongguk frowned.

"Oh no! That's awful! When- when you're so sick, too! How- how awful," Jeongguk stammered,
and then reached forward, hugging Taehyung tightly. "I didn't know she was bad too! I'm sorry,
Taehyung."

Taehyung felt his cheeks redden when he felt Jeongguk's cheek against his own and then smiled a
little. He'd never gotten red before like this. Taehyung patted his back, and then looked at him
closely.

"You- you know I wasn't trying to sleep with Rosie or anything like that, right?" Taehyung said
softly, and Jeongguk stilled. Jeongguk nodded. "I do now."

Taehyung looked at Jeongguk with his dazzling darkened eyes, and Jeongguk felt himself break a
little. They were close, Jeongguk looked down at him, Taehyung up, their eyes meeting with vigor.
"Y'know," Taehyung said softly. "I did promise I'd fuck you again,"

"D-don't-" Jeongguk squeaked out. "Don't say that. You'll g-get my hopes up again-" Jeongguk
began, and then saw Taehyung leaning in closer, his breath infusing with Jeongguk's.

"Hm, why don't you come to that holiday with me, Jeongguk?" Taehyung whispered, and
Jeongguk gulped, biting his lip.
"N-no. Because- because w-we're married, and-" Jeongguk began, and gripped Taehyung's shirt
tighter when he kept moving further in. "And- and I've got work-"

"Shush, darling," Taehyung whispered. "You fret too much,"

Jeongguk looked at him with his big doe eyes. "T-Taehyung don't d-do this. I don't want to- I don't
want to fall for y-"

Taehyung pressed their lips together. Jeongguk's breath hitched, and he felt Taehyung move in,
kissing him firmly. Jeongguk didn't kiss back- and then pulled away.

"You're doing it again, Taehyung. You're doing this because- because you just found out about
Veronica, a-and now you want control again. It's wrong. Morally, it's-"

Taehyung kissed him again. Jeongguk pushed him off. "You don't want me, Taehyung! You just
want-"

"I know, I know I said all that," Taehyung said softly, looking into Jeongguk's eyes. "But frankly,
darling- I've never wanted anyone as much as I want you right now."

Jeongguk's breath hitched. He felt his cheeks burn into a red, and then blinked. "I-I'm scared. I
don't want you to sleep around-"

"I won't," Taehyung said, leaning up. "Kiss me, please."

Jeongguk shook his head, and Taehyung frowned, tilting his head. "No one's turned me down so
many times, Jeongguk. You must have impeccable self-control,"

"I know you're a liar. You'll kiss me and then go sleep with 8 women." Jeongguk mumbled, and
Taehyung smiled a bit, seeing the upset in his eyes, how he looked so pretty still.

"No, angel," Taehyung said, and then gulped. "I want to kiss you because- because no one's ever
made me feel so... comfortable before," Taehyung whispered, letting their noses nudge against
each other. "Everyone only ever wants to sleep with me. You seem to want to get to know me-"

"D-don't, Taehyung-" Jeongguk stammered, and then rolled off the bed, standing up. "I must
leave."

Taehyung looked at him. "Alright," Taehyung said in a small voice, and Jeongguk fumbled with
his fingers for a few seconds. Jeongguk let out a cry, looking down.

"W-well don't make that face! You look so-" Jeongguk began, and then looked up, eyebrows
furrowed. "Handsome," Jeongguk mumbled, and then leaned forward, kissed his cheek, and turned
around to run out of the room, his own cheeks burning.

Taehyung smiled to himself, feeling his cheeks redden. He'd never felt this thrill before, this mirth
from a simple kiss on the cheek. Taehyung felt awed in someway- mind feeling cluttered as he
revisited that small moment where Jeongguk kissed his cheek. It made his insides warm.

The door opened, and Taehyung saw Veronica. She walked in and smiled. "Ah, you're up."

"How was the doctor?" Taehyung asked, and saw as she looked into the mirror on the wall, fixing
her hair.

"Ah, you know. The usual. Had a bigger cock than you," Veronica said, and then looked at
Taehyung- who looked at her in annoyance.

"I saw your god-awful whore of an assistant walking around with her tits out. Did you get your
dick sucked?" Veronica asked, and Taehyung snickered weakly.

"Sure," Taehyung said, and then saw Veronica walk up to him. She walked closer, and then
gripped his jaw.

"Don't drop like that again, Taehyung. A panic attack? How childish. I'm telling everyone you had
some sort of hereditary heart disease to make you look a little more manly." She said roughly and
then left his jaw.

Taehyung looked up, felt Veronica's words forming that awful anxious feeling in his chest again-
the one he always felt. But he closed his eyes.

Closed his eyes and envisioned Jeongguk. And then; and then it was fine. He was fine.

**
 Chapter 12

**

Rosie looked outside the tall window, her feet dangling onto the black wired balcony. Her hair was
messy today, sitting in long curls on her small shoulders. She applied a coat of pink nail polish on
her last finger and hummed to herself in delight, seeing it staying perfectly in her cuticle.

Rosie suddenly heard a soft gasp and looked down at the street from her balcony, and then felt her
eyes grow curious upon spotting a couple. A woman, perhaps of her age or a little older with short
blonde hair, and with her, a man. Tall, brooding, handsome, black hair slicked back. He wore a
tight shirt with muscles evident below them, pants high.

"I love you, Diane, you know that." He rasped, and the woman giggled in delight, kissing the man's
cheek. The man brought his hand forward and handed the woman a rose. The woman with the
short blonde hair smiled, taking the rose with a blush. "Why, aren't you romantic?" She said, and
the man smiled.

Rosie watched from her balcony, finding it endearing. She sighed to herself, seeing the couple trot
along the walkway, holding hands, both laughing together in content. Rosie put down her nail
paint, looking inside the living room from the balcony and seeing Jeongguk sitting on the couch,
reading a novel.

Rosie stood up, walking over to her husband, the large white shirt he had on falling from one side,
narrow shoulder blade and collarbone visible. Rosie hummed, standing in front of him, finding how
he didn't look up at her.

"Jeongguk," Rosie said, and Jeongguk looked up from the book achingly. "Let's go on a date."

Jeongguk chuckled, and then hummed and looked back at his book. "It's far too cold."

"Oh but," Rosie began, and then sighed, looking outside the window. "It's February. That's the
month of romance, isn't it! The day of Valentine's is approaching. Let's go out for a boat ride. And
eat pastry from a little bakery by the shore. Doesn't it sound fascinating?" Rosie asked.

"It's too cold," Jeongguk said again, looking at his book.

Rosie felt her shoulders dropped. She sat down beside him, biting her lip, remembering how that
muscled man from earlier on the road looked like he'd catch the stars for that woman. Oh, and
how handsome he was. Wide shoulders, firm chest, a mustache, dark eyes, slicked hair-

Rosie watched how Jeongguk tucked his knees up to his chest, feet playing with one another. The
man bit his bottom lip, entranced into the book, eyes wide and glimmering. He giggled to himself,
bringing one finger to play with the locks of his hair.

Rosie turned away and found a magazine she bought earlier sitting on the coffee table. She picked
it up and flickered through the pages, and then finally stopped on one. It was a picture of Aubrey
Hepburn. She looked beautiful, hair in a bun, lips red, eyes doe-like.

"How beautiful," Rosie commented, and then felt a presence, and turned a little and saw Jeongguk
looking at the magazine with big eyes. He hummed a little, looking dazed. "Yes. Very."

"Isn't she? You know, I saw this exact dress in a store the other-" Rosie began, but then Jeongguk
put his fingertips on the page of the magazine, and Rosie looked and saw his fingertips pressing on
an old picture of James Dean.

Rosie looked with confusion as Jeongguk tilted his head, sighing. "So handsome." Jeongguk
purred, and then bit his lip. "He was so bad boyish, wasn't he? His eyes, they're killer," Jeongguk
commented, mouth a little open, lost in thought.

Rosie nodded, ignoring her confusion and continuing to flick through the pages of the magazine.
She reached another page and then heard a hum. "That pink doesn't really suit her complexion,
does it? She'd look much nicer in a lighter tone. Perhaps a peach." Jeongguk said, and Rosie looked
at him again.

Jeongguk had his fingers facing him, mindlessly flicking at his cuticles. "Did you see that awful
dress she was wearing at that duke's gala last week?" Jeongguk asked, and Rosie gulped.

"I-I did."

"Hideous, really. Yellow at nighttime with frills? How horribly hideous." Jeongguk continued, and
then looked and saw Rosie looking at him with large concerned eyes.

Jeongguk's breath hitched. "I mean." Jeongguk began and then grabbed his novel again, changing
his sitting position and putting his feet forward, clearing his throat. "Don't you have matters to
attend to?"

"Oh! You're right, I'd almost forgotten," Rosie gasped, forgetting about Jeongguk's mannerisms.
She stood up, racing to the side to grab a coat. "I've got to go to work! I'll see you later at night,
love."

"See you," Jeongguk responded, gripping onto the edges of the book tightly.

"Love you-" Rosie began, and then opened the door and let out a gasp. Jeongguk looked, worried,
but then felt his insides curl when he saw a blonde haired man.

"Well there, Rosie. Aren't you in a hurry?" A deep voice husked with a chuckle following it. Rosie
giggled. "I've got work. Why, how manly of me to say so and leave Jeongguk behind like this! Are
you here to meet him?"

"Yes, yes. Where is your funereal husband?" Taehyung's voice continued, and then Rosie turned
and gestured at the living room. Jeongguk curled up, knees against his chest again upon seeing
Taehyung.

"W-why're you here?" Jeongguk let out, timid, brows furrowed.

"Jeonggukie, that sounds a bit impolite, doesn't it?" Rosie asked, worried. Jeongguk saw Taehyung
smirk, stepping into his home, snowflakes on his hair and shoulders. "Yes, Jeonggukie. It's rather
impudent. I'm gravely offended." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk's cheeks burned crimson red.

"Goodbye!" Rosie called out, and then walked out of her home, closing the door behind her. Now
with the door closed, it was just Taehyung and Jeongguk. Jeongguk watched as Taehyung looked
around the small home, humming to himself.

Jeongguk got up from the couch, placing the book on the coffee table and then walking away to the
kitchen. "Yes some tea would be wonderful, thank you." Taehyung scoffed, and Jeongguk looked
at him with angered eyes.

"What are you doing barging into my home like this?" Jeongguk said, fists coiled.

"As if you haven't walked into my house three times begging me to put my cock in your ass,"
Taehyung said, and Jeongguk's eyes grew big. Taehyung watched with delight as a pretty red
flickered onto his cheeks and nose.

"You're crude!" Jeongguk snapped, and Taehyung walked up to the open kitchen, leaning against
the countertop.

"I know, darling. It's my specialty. Now, won't you ask if I'm feeling better?" Taehyung asked,
tilting his head. Jeongguk bit the inside of his cheek, fumbling with the kettle.

"I can tell you are."

"Well, I'm not. I feel absolutely horrible, and the fact that you left me so ill in the hospital last
week made me numb. Constant headaches, Jeongguk. Thanks to you." Taehyung barked, and
Jeongguk paused.

He looked at Taehyung worriedly. "I-I'm sorry!" Jeongguk let out, eyes big. "I t-thought you were
alright, I wouldn't have l-left if-"

Taehyung began laughing. Jeongguk quietened, and then saw the older filter out his giggles and
then walk up to the younger. "You are absolutely adorable, Jeongguk." Taehyung sighed, standing
right beside him. Jeongguk shook his head and then turned back to the kettle.

"You're rude," Jeongguk said, and then felt Taehyung long fingers stretch out and reach his
shoulder blade which was on display. Jeongguk looked up at the golden-haired man and saw an
awed grin reach his face.

Taehyung leaned forward and placed his hands on Jeongguk's small waist, squeezing it gently. He
hovered his lips down his neck and onto his shoulder, ghosting his breath over the smooth surface,
the younger shivering in his touch.

"T-Taehyung-" Jeongguk called out, but then felt his hand fumble and almost spill the hot water
from the kettle onto the countertop. Taehyung hissed, wrapping his arms around the boy's waist
and pulling back until Jeongguk was entrapped in his hold.

"Careful, lamb. You'll hurt yourself." Taehyung whispered, and Jeongguk stilled in his hold, hands
splaying onto his larger ones on his stomach.

Jeongguk let out a little gasp when he felt Taehyung's lips begin sucking on his neck. Jeongguk bit
his lip and fumbled one hand to the back of Taehyung's head, holding him there while he nibbled
gently on his soft skin.

Taehyung's hands reached under Jeongguk's white shirt, reaching onto his stomach and keeping his
hands there. Jeongguk flinched at the feeling of Taehyung's cold hands on his stomach, but then
whimpered when he brought his hands up and began rounding his fingertips around his nipples.

"T-Tae-" Jeongguk whispered, and Taehyung pulled away from his neck and began sucking gentle
hickies onto his collarbone. Taehyung continued with his fingers and twisted Jeongguk's nipple, the
younger biting his bottom lip at this strange happening.

Taehyung suddenly left his hands and dropped them, Jeongguk feeling a whine get caught in his
throat at the loss. But before he could, Taehyung spun him around, so they were facing each other.
Jeongguk looked up at him, but then saw Taehyung reach onto his shirt and tear it open, buttons
sliding off in ease as if meant for Taehyung to take off.

Jeongguk put his hands on Taehyung's jaw but then gasped out when Taehyung pounced forward
and wrapped his plump lips onto Jeongguk's nipple. Jeongguk whimpered, hands gripping
Taehyung's hair, watching as the blonde haired man sucked on his teat in joy.

Jeongguk breathed heavily, feeling Taehyung go further down, kissing down his chest, his
stomach, and then tugging down his trousers in one go. Taehyung got down on his knees, kissing
Jeongguk's stomach. Jeongguk's breath hitched.

"T-Taehyung no, we-we can't! Not again, you'll just- you'll just leave me again, a-and-"

"Please," Taehyung said, looking up at him, eyes still dark and holding their confident poise,
despite being down on his knees. "I just want you. No one else."

"I don't know..." Jeongguk squeaked weakly, but then felt Taehyung reach forward and mouth on
his cock over his pants. Jeongguk felt himself give in to that pleasure, losing himself. "Tae,"
Jeongguk whispered, and Taehyung pulled his briefs down, seeing his half hard cock.

"Let me," Taehyung whispered, and then mouthing on his cock, despite it not being fully hard.
Jeongguk jerked his hips at that, stuttering out a moan, cock growing harder on his lips.

Taehyung gripped Jeongguk's bony hips, licking up the length of his cock and heatedly so-
finishing his stripe and then mouthing on the head of his cock. Jeongguk flushed at the warmth
around his cock, seeing Taehyung take more of him, swirling his tongue around his cock.

"T-Taehyungie-" Jeongguk squeaked out, and Taehyung looked up at that, somehow smirking with
a cock in his mouth. Jeongguk blushed at that, knowing he was peaking climax already, despite
Taehyung barely doing much.

Taehyung took more of him, deepthroating him. Jeongguk felt tears prick his eyes at the
oversensitivity, watching as Taehyung slowly leeched off his cock, pulling out quickly, still
breathing out heavily on the head of his cock. "Fuck my mouth," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk
gulped.

"I-I don't-" Jeongguk stammered, and then saw Taehyung take him in his mouth again. Jeongguk
cried out, not knowing he would do that. Jeongguk saw Taehyung grip his hand and place it on the
backside of his head as if urging him to fuck his mouth. Taehyung looked up, and Jeongguk bit his
lip, and then began thrusting into Taehyung's mouth.

Taehyung moaned out, and Jeongguk took one hand up and unknowingly put his fingers between
his lips, licking around them with big bambi eyes while fucking Taehyung's mouth. Taehyung took
it with vigor, lavishing around getting his throat fucked. He felt Jeongguk tighten his grip on his
hair and shove Taehyung's mouth onto his cock.

Taehyung choked, letting out a rough moan, deepthroating Jeongguk completely. Jeongguk let out
a squeak of fear, tears filling his eyes from the sensitivity. The warmth around his cock gave him
immense pleasure, yet the sight of his small fingers bunched around Taehyung's hair, forcing him
down his cock- it made Jeongguk curl his toes, getting closer and closer to his climax.

Taehyung looked up, eyes big, plump lips dribbling out spit. Jeongguk heard Taehyung whimper
around his cock and then let out a loud cry, cumming into his mouth.

Taehyung smiled around his cock, looking manic. He took all of Jeongguk's cum into his mouth
and then slowly pulled off his softening cock, lapping up as much of his cum as he could, and then
pulling his mouth off and breathing heavily.

Jeongguk stood there, practically naked, pants bunched around his ankles and shirt ripped open.
Taehyung stood up, smirking, lips plump and glistening.

"I love your cock in my mouth." Taehyung rasped, voice rough. Jeongguk sniffled.

He got down on his knees wordlessly, legs pushed to the side, hands brought to his chest needily.
Taehyung pet his hair. "Oh, little one. You want to get me off too, pretty?"

Jeongguk's eyes glazed, forgetting he was in his kitchen, forgetting this was his home he shared
with his wife, forgetting about how he'd asked Taehyung to stay away. He loved getting talked to
like this. Felt an overwhelmingly pleasurable feeling take over him at it.

Jeongguk nodded, putting his nose on his clothed member. Taehyung chuckled, and Jeongguk bit
his lip and almost moaned at how he could see a droplet of cum in the corner of Taehyung's lips.
Jeongguk saw him unbutton his trousers, push his briefs down only enough to take his cock out.

Jeongguk saw his large member so close and preened, and brought his fingertips to his mouth
again, pushing them between his lips and licking around them. It was something he did quite often,
unknowingly. Taehyung tsked, pulling his hand out, tightening hold on his wrist.

"Darling if you want my cock in your mouth you will only get my cock in your mouth. Nothing
else." Taehyung said lowly, and Jeongguk's stomach took turns.

Jeongguk nodded. "Good baby." Jeongguk got up on his knees better. Good baby.

Jeongguk didn't know why was acting so strange, but submitting to Taehyung felt wonderful, over
joyously wonderful. He wished to do it always.

Taehyung gripped Jeongguk's hair, and Jeongguk reached out hesitantly. He began sucking on the
large head of his cock with his small princess lips, looking up nervously while doing so. Taehyung
smirked, wondering how he got so fucking lucky.

Jeongguk continued sucking on the tip of his cock like a kitten on a bottle, and Taehyung just
growled under his breath and then grabbed Jeongguk by the back of his head and pushed his mouth
onto his cock.

Jeongguk moaned around his cock, already feeling stuffed though he only had half of Taehyung's
cock in him. Taehyung knew Jeongguk probably would begin sobbing if Taehyung made him deep
throat- so he just pushed Jeongguk's head back and forth the half of his cock.

Jeongguk cupped the base of Taehyung's cock with trembling hands, letting out a shaken whimper
with every thrust into his mouth. Jeongguk looked up, eyes big and filled with tears already.
Jeongguk moaned around his cock, mouthful. Taehyung licked his lips, seeing Jeongguk's eyes,
and began fucking his mouth faster.

Jeongguk let him, just gagging and whimpering with every slide in and out of his warm lips.
Jeongguk felt strange, never had something so large in his mouth, never had a man's girth in his
mouth. It was strange, strange, yes, but not bad.

Jeongguk suddenly began letting out little high pitched moans around Taehyung's cock, so
Taehyung pulled his cock out for a second, and then smeared the strings of cum leaving his cock
on Jeongguk's lips like lipstick.

Jeongguk looked up at Taehyung, not doing anything, just willfully going under Taehyung's
control. Taehyung pet his hair and then pushed into his mouth a little. Jeongguk liked it. Loved it.
Loved having Taehyung's cock in his mouth. Loved it.

"You're so fucking pretty, christ- look at you," Taehyung growled, and Jeongguk breathed out
deeply, blinking his doll lashes. "Could fuck your mouth forever."

Jeongguk nodded as if telling him to do so. Taehyung chuckled, and then pushed his cock a little
deeper in, and came. Jeongguk's eyes widened, feeling the saline liquid run down his throat.
Jeongguk felt Taehyung slowly pull out, and then let out a broken stutter of "T-Taehy-hyungie-"

"It's okay. Come, let me help you dress," Taehyung whispered, and reached out and lifted the
younger boy up. Jeongguk felt himself stand up and then felt his briefs and trousers being tugged
on. He felt a firm squeeze to his ass before, however.

Jeongguk watched as Taehyung buttoned up Jeongguk's shirt, ensuring to leave it open so the
oversized material fell off both his shoulders. Jeongguk let be turned to face the table. "The tea's
gotten cold now, love."

"M's-sorry." Jeongguk sniffled, and Taehyung kissed his cheek softly. "Hey, hey it's okay, darling.
Don't apologize. Would you like to go sit down?"

Jeongguk nodded. Taehyung lifted him up with ease, holding him in his arms like a child.
Jeongguk wrapped his arms and legs around the man, wishing Taehyung held him in his arms
forever. Taehyung sat down on his couch with a lapful of Jeongguk and saw the younger press his
forehead against his.

"I-I-" Jeongguk stammered, and then took a deep breath. "I feel different around you."

"Different?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk nodded, feeling drowsy, drained.

"L-like. I'm at ease." Jeongguk continued, Taehyung holding him tightly. "Don't have to think too
much around you. Don't h-have to think before saying anything. Don't have to-"

"Don't have to hide?" Taehyung whispered, and Jeongguk nodded, hiding his face in Taehyung's
neck.

"It's alright, darling. We crave for freedom. For the restrictions around us to vanish. I wish they
could, Jeongguk." Taehyung sighed softly and then saw Jeongguk shift around on his lap. "Do you
feel like you can't be yourself around Rosie?"

"S-she looks at me oddly when I do. As if I've been talking about m-murdering someone."
Jeongguk stammered, and Taehyung looked at him with big eyes. "I- I like gushing about all sorts
of things. G-growing up, my mother and my a-aunt and my grandmother raised me. They were
untethering women, and I love them so much."

"Can you be yourself around them?"

Jeongguk shrugged. "I don't know. I read the books they read and listened to the music they
listened to, a-and did all the things they did. I know how to knit a dress and paint toenails."

"I'll let you paint mine sometime," Taehyung whispered into his ear with a small smile, and
Jeongguk giggled, feeling at ease.

Jeongguk laid against him, and then looked up. "Do you feel restricted around Veronica?"

Taehyung tensed. He was paused for a bit, and then hummed, looking away. "I love her. But she's
judgemental. Mean. She's scared I'll become a crazy abusive controlling husband if she stops."
Taehyung said, and Jeongguk wrapped her arms around Taehyung.

There was a small pause, and then; "Also I can't suck her cock." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk
burst out laughing.

He giggled against Taehyung. "Y-you're crude! You're absolutely, horrifically, unquestionably

crude." Jeongguk said, and Taehyung smiled. "And you've got some strange affection for my
cock!"

"I wish it were in my mouth at all times." Taehyung hummed with a smile, and Jeongguk giggled
again, blushing hard.

"H-how... vulgar of us," Jeongguk whispered, and Taehyung smirked. "I'm rather vulgar if you
haven't figured it out yet, Ggukie."

Jeongguk preened at that nickname, snuggling onto Taehyung's chest. Taehyung cooed, stroking
his back. "Little lawyer," Taehyung said gently, and Jeongguk blushed, liking the caretaking, the
affection. "Be yourself around me more often. I'd like it very much."

"Why did you come here, Taehyung?" Jeongguk asked, looking at him suddenly. Taehyung looked
up at the boy on his lap and looked at the younger. Taehyung leaned forward and pressed their lips
together.

Jeongguk lapped into the kiss, cupping his jaw and kissing him back, lips moving together, warm
and slow. Jeongguk pressed his forehead against Taehyung's, feeling all of his mouth in him.

Taehyung pulled away. "To do that," Taehyung whispered.

Jeongguk blushed bright pink. He fisted Taehyung's collar between his small hands and reached
forward, pressing their noses together. "Liar," Jeongguk said, and then Taehyung tensed.

"Goddamn. You've caught me. I came here to ask you again to come with me to France."
Taehyung said, and Jeongguk looked up at him.

"Taehyung... we-"

"We'll be alone," Taehyung whispered, gripping his thighs. "We can have sex every day. Drink
wine for breakfast. Sit outside by the stars. We can kiss. Outside." Taehyung said softly, and
Jeongguk's eyes grew big.

"But our jobs..." Jeongguk trailed. "You have a holiday next week. I need to take a holiday next
week. Doctor's orders." Taehyung grinned.

"But... Rosie and V-"

"We're going on a fishing trip. Plus, Veronica's busy with work and wouldn't want to go with me
anyway. And Rosie'll understand, no? I'll convince her." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk rose his
eyebrow.

"She's my wife."

"Jeongguk I've got every woman in this world smitten for me. Don't dwell upon it." Taehyung
winked, and Jeongguk giggled, sliding off his lap and seeing him stand up.

"Jimin said you're the most arrogant self-absorbed bastard he's ever met."

Taehyung, while fixing his hair in the reflection of a window, turned to Jeongguk and scoffed.
"Who's Jimin?"

"My friend from school," Jeongguk explained. "He thinks you're great. But you are pretty cocky,
Taehyung."

"I'm not cocky I'm just better than everyone," Taehyung explained casually, and then looked at his
watch and sighed. "I've got to go to work and collect some papers. I asked my assistant to do it, but
she can't do a single thing right," Taehyung grumbled.

"Tell the company to hire someone else for you, then," Jeongguk said.

"I hired her," Taehyung explained. "One time she sucked my cock instead of taking a paycheck.
The firm loves her. Saves them a lot of money." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk frowned.

"You're so.... strange. You probably hired her because she was attractive or something." Jeongguk
settled with, and Taehyung looked at him and then scoffed, hands in his pockets.

"Well, yeah. I've got to look at her face outside from my door every fucking day, might as well
make it worth it," Taehyung said, and saw Jeongguk cringe. Taehyung walked closer to him.

"I'm only joking, darling," Taehyung whispered, leaning down and peppering kisses on his full
cheeks. "But really, I've got to go. I'll see you." Taehyung said. "Give me your answer about the
trip by tomorrow."

Jeongguk hummed. Taehyung leaned down and kissed his forehead. Jeongguk bit his lip, blinking
his lashes while looking up. He saw Taehyung walk away, and then sighed to himself when
Taehyung walked out the door, giving Jeongguk a quick smile.

Jeongguk leaned his head against the soft sofa. Jeongguk giggled to himself, playing with his
fingers, heart fluttering at the thought of the man.

Later, Rosie came back home, tired. Jeongguk took her things from her hands and kept them on the
table. He'd cleaned the kitchen floor 4 times, ensured she wouldn't catch a whiff of anything. Rosie
pecked Jeongguk quickly.

"I'm so sorry, Jeonggukie. You must feel like a woman! Running around the house, making dinner
and all of that. I'm sorry. I'll quit work at once, I-"

"No! No, Rosie, don't. I'm fine. You need to eat and then go to bed." Jeongguk said, and Rosie
nodded, walking to the kitchen and seeing a lamb stew.

"Rosie. I was- um- well I've got the week off starting Saturday." Jeongguk stammered, and then
Rosie looked at him. "I'll be going on a fishing trip with Taehyung. I hope that's alright."
Rosie blinked. "Of-of course! Yes, you rarely go out with friends. It'd be nice. Taehyung's so
generous. Veronica showed me pictures of their lake house, it looks beautiful." Rosie chimed, and
Jeongguk smiled.

"Great," Jeongguk whispered, already feeling his stomach pulsate in excitement for next week.

**
 Chapter 13

**

It had been a week or two since their last meeting. Taehyung was leaning against his sleek black
car, seeing the chauffer hurriedly carry the suitcase towards the trunk of the car. Taehyung was
dressed casually, which was quite rare for the man. Black trousers, a tight beige shirt clung to his
firm chest, a leather jacket on, and black sunglasses on his face. He had a delighted smirk on his
face as he blew smoke out of his lips.

"Bit sloppy today, are you Jackson?" Taehyung asked his chauffeur, who put the suitcase into the
boot of the car. The sun was hot today, subduing the cold in the earth. His chauffeur, Jackson,
gulped.

"Sorry, sir." He nodded quickly, and Taehyung chuckled. He loved seeing how intimidated people
got of him. It made him ecstatic.

"Taehyung," Veronica's voice emerged, and Taehyung's eyes drifted to the front door of their
house, seeing Veronica standing there in a sheer black nightgown. He saw her breasts pressed
against the loose fabric and chewed on the inside of his mouth, standing up properly and walking
down the gravel path and onto the steps leading to the front of the house.

"What is it, dear?" Taehyung asked, and Veronica walked down the steps, barefoot.

"You didn't tell me you were leaving," Veronica said, sounding a little bothered by this fact.
Taehyung scoffed.

"Didn't think I had to tell you anything. You never seem to do the same." Taehyung said, and
Veronica looked away.

"Are you going to France? To the lake house in Provence?" Veronica asked, and Taehyung
hummed, taking a smoke while looking to the other side of the road, waiting for Jeongguk's arrival.

Taehyung had called him the night before and curtly told him to pack his things for tomorrow, as
they'd be leaving at noon. Jeongguk had stammered a quiet response over the phone, but the
excitement was more than visible.

"Yes. I already told you this, Ronnie. Why're you looking so at sea?" Taehyung asked, and
Veronica leaned forward and put her hands on Taehyung's shirt.

"I didn't know you were... leaving. I thought you were going later." Veronica mumbled, eyes
darting to his dark ones. "I don't like being alone."

"You do act like it," Taehyung said, and then took another drag of the cigarette, but before he could
let it out, Veronica reached up to press their lips together. Taehyung tensed, blowing the smoke
into her lips and putting one hand on her waist.

"Don't act this way. You told me last week you were happy I'd be gone." Taehyung muttered, and
Veronica looked up at him.
"I didn't mean it," Veronica said, hushed. "You know I never mean it."

"Then why do you always say it?" Taehyung said, sharply. Veronica looked tensed and let go of
his shirt. Taehyung sighed and leaned down to kiss her cheek. "I'm sorry. I'll be back soon."

"I-I don't need you to be back soon," Veronica said, and Taehyung turned around. "There's the wife
I married." Taehyung sighed to himself and then walked down the steps of the house and towards
the car.

Taehyung felt a smile reach his lips upon seeing Jeongguk looking around innocently, eyeing the
luxurious car. Jeongguk saw the chauffer step out and jumped back a little, mumbling out a quick
apology.

"I-I thought it was someone else's car. Sorry!" Jeongguk said, and then turned and saw Taehyung
walking up to him. Jeongguk's breath hitched at the man's beauty, it always did.

"It is my car, Jeongguk. Ah, you're adorable. Jackson- keep his things at the back." Taehyung
ordered, and the driver nodded and took the suitcase from Jeongguk's grasp- which Jeongguk let go
of shyly, not wanting to make someone else do work for him.

"You said goodbye to Rosie, didn't you?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk chuckled. "Of course I
did. I'm not as bad of a husband as you."

Taehyung rose his eyebrow, and Jeongguk bit his lip, looking down. "Sorry. Didn't mean to sound
so rude."

"I'm sure Rosie would be elated to find out her husband's taken bigger cock than she has,"
Taehyung said, quite loud. Jeongguk's eyes widened and he smacked Taehyung on the chest
harshly, noticing how the chauffeur heard that and looked up.

"Come on. Get in the car." Taehyung said, giving Jeongguk's waist a push. The driver rushed
hurriedly to open the car door for Jeongguk, and Jeongguk thanked him bashfully and sat inside
the car.

Taehyung was going to leave but then heard his name being called. The man turned around and
saw Veronica again. "What is it?" Taehyung asked sharply.

"Is it so painful for you to say goodbye?" Veronica said sarcastically, and Taehyung looked at her
irately. Veronica leaned her hands forward to fix Taehyung's shirt, mumbling "You're never in
order, always in a mess in situations like these-" but Taehyung grabbed her wrists before she
could.

"I'm not a child, Veronica. Stop treating me like one." Taehyung irked, pulling himself back.
Veronica looked at him in annoyance as well.

"It's because I love you," Veronica said, and Taehyung snickered, turning around to walk to the
other side of the car and sit inside. Jeongguk watched from inside the car with big eyes, having
seen the whole thing. He looked at Veronica, who saw Jeongguk and felt herself grow angrier.
Jeongguk looked away quickly.

"Goodbye," Veronica called out, and Taehyung hummed and then sat inside the car, closing the
door sharply. "Drive," Taehyung instructed, and the chauffeur began driving quite speedily, which
Taehyung was pleased with.

"You didn't bid farewell to your wife?" Jeongguk asked in a small voice, and Taehyung looked at
him. He looked at Jeongguk for a few seconds and then smirked, looking ahead. "She's in the car
with me,"

Jeongguk frowned. "I'm not your wife, mister. How impolite." Jeongguk hummed, and Taehyung
slid his hand onto Jeongguk's thigh. Jeongguk saw wearily as the chauffeur kept giving the two
confused looks from the rearview mirror.

"Are we taking a train to France?" Jeongguk asked to break the silence. Taehyung chuckled. "No,
baby. We're taking a flight."

"A-a flight?" Jeongguk squeaked suddenly, hand going to his lips as he looked at Taehyung with
widened eyes. "As- as in on- o-on an airplane?"

"Yes, love. It'll take 2 hours or so." Taehyung responded casually, and Jeongguk still had wide
eyes.

"B-but-! That- that must be awfully expensive, Taehyung! You- you musn't spend so much... h-
how will I pay you back?" Jeongguk asked.

"You don't have to pay me back, Jeongguk. Your presence is enough." Taehyung said sultrily, and
Jeongguk tensed up. "Besides, I think I'll receive a little... payment when we reach the lakehouse,
don't you?"

Jeongguk blushed, biting his lip while looking at the older man. Taehyung leaned in, his face an
inch away from Jeongguk's. Jeongguk shook his head. "T-the.. the chauffeur-"

"He won't care," Taehyung said loud enough for him to hear. "I'm the one paying him after all,
aren't I?" Taehyung said, turning around to see the driver's eyes shift to the side. Jeongguk bit his
lip, watching Taehyung lean forward and press their lips together.

Jeongguk gripped onto the seat, humming into his mouth. The driver's eyes widened, and he tried
focusing on the road, but his eyes stood fixated on the two from the mirror in front. Jeongguk
kissed Taehyung back gently, not wanting to overdo it. Taehyung reached his hand up Jeongguk's
thigh, and the younger moaned gingerly into his lips.

Taehyung pulled away finally, and Jeongguk looked away in an instant, feeling humiliation and
guilt filling his insides upon doing this. Letting someone else watch. Watch their wrongdoings.
"Don't fret it, love. He's seen me do worse with numerous ladies," Taehyung chuckled.

Jeongguk shook his head. "I-it's not the same." He whispered, and Taehyung saw how nervous he
looked, how he refused to meet Taehyung's eyes. He was embarrassed to let someone else see how
easily he gave into Taehyung's lips.

"Don't be ashamed." Taehyung leaned in to whisper into his ear. Jeongguk shivered. "It's hard not
to be," Jeongguk mumbled.

They reached the airport, and Jeongguk forgot of the earlier endeavors and rushed out of the car to
look around in excitement. He felt a little underdressed, in only a simple black jacket, blue trousers,
and redshirt. Everyone looked rich, exuding wealth. Of course they did. Only the wealthy could
afford flights to places.

Taehyung got out of the car and then waited for Jackson to open the boot and take out the luggage.
Taehyung saw the driver look hesitant, and then look at Taehyung with a weary look. "I-it's wrong,
sir. What you do."
"I don't quite remember asking," Taehyung chuckled dryly, and Jackson gulped down his
weariness. "But- b-but- a man with- with another? Aren't you- aren't you afraid?"

"Afraid of what?"

"The consequences?"

Taehyung stilled. He looked at him for a few seconds, and then hummed. "Give me the bags,"
Taehyung said, and Jackson handed over the suitcases, which Taehyung picked up with ease.
"Take the car back to the house. And don't speak of this, Jackson. I do assume you like the security
of a job, don't you?" Taehyung said lowly, and Jackson nodded hurriedly.

Taehyung walked over to where Jeongguk was, looking around the rather mundane looking white
building with big eyes. Taehyung saw two men, smoking and chatting while walking ahead- and
saw one of them bump into Jeongguk. "Watch it!" One of them commented, dressed in their thick
rich brown coats.

Jeongguk nodded shyly, backing away. "S-sorry." Jeongguk trailed, and then turned and saw
Taehyung, and sighed in relief. He rushed up to Taehyung and took his bag from the older's hands,
smiling. "Let's go!"

It took a bit of time for both to check in, Jeongguk looking nervous while Taehyung chatted up
with the woman giving them their tickets. Jeongguk watched her blush and giggle at him. They
then walked to security, where Taehyung somehow managed to make the young man checking him
blush. They then walked to the airplane and reached in time.

"Nervous?" Taehyung asked as the walked up the steel stairs to the airplane. Jeongguk walked in
front of him, looking astounded. He felt excited. It was all so luxurious. Jeongguk felt a pat to his
ass, and put his hands on it protectively, hearing a laugh from the older.

Jeongguk looked into the airplane and gasped out a vowel. He saw the circular windows on the
sides, the cabin was small, but the seats were big and plush as if extending to become small beds.
Jeongguk saw older men, poise ladies, a child, looking snooty and annoyed- probably being sent
off to boarding school.

"Your seats are here," An air hostess chirped, pointing at two seats at the end of the plane.
Jeongguk trotted ahead excitedly, but then let out a small sound of disappointment when he noticed
his seat was the aisle.

"Want the window?" Taehyung asked with a small smile. Jeongguk looked at him tentatively and
nodded. Taehyung hummed. "Too bad it's mine, huh?"

Jeongguk bit his lip and watched as Taehyung looked at him closely. Jeongguk shied down,
reaching forward and poking Taehyung's chest. "Please Taehyungie?" Jeongguk said airily, and
Taehyung breathed out a sigh.

"Fine." Taehyung dramatically stated, and Jeongguk giggled and scooted in to sit down beside the
window. He sat down and looked outside the circular glass restlessly. Taehyung sat down beside
him, looking rather bored already.

The flight took off soon, Jeongguk watching as Taehyung beckoned the air hostess over, and then
asked for two glasses of red wine. The air hostess nodded and returned with two glasses and a
bottle. While pouring them the drinks, Taehyung smiled charmingly. "Why, don't you have lovely
eyes. Green, are they?"
The woman blushed, eyes growing big. "Y-yes. Sometimes blue, actually."

"Both suit you, darling." Taehyung smiled, and the woman blushed deeper and giggled out a thank
you, before rushing away with her fingers grasped tightly around the neck of the bottle.

Jeongguk looked at Taehyung and pouted a little, feeling slightly jealous of the attention Taehyung
was giving to these women. Jeongguk knew if it wasn't for, well, everything- he'd hold Taehyung's
hand tightly and kiss him where everyone could see them.

Of course, he couldn't. The thought itself was ludicrous.

They reached the south of France quite quickly. They exited the planes and once they'd finished
checking out of the airport, took a car awaiting them to the lake house.

"The house belongs to my father. He'd gifted it to Veronica and me for our wedding." Taehyung
explained. Jeongguk tilted his head.

"I thought you two eloped?"

Taehyung sighed. "Well, yes. Technically. We ran off one night and got married at the state house.
I didn't really need to elope. My parents loved her. Thought she was feisty and a great woman for
me." Taehyung said. "I just eloped because I felt like it."

"Felt like it?" Jeongguk laughed.

"Yes. I felt a strange sense of needing to do something horribly wrong when I reached my last
month of being 18. I knew Veronica for a long time. I loved her. Still, do, but back then I really did
love her. She was loud and knew what she wanted and didn't wish to hide it. She was adorable,
really. So one night, after I found her crying because of something her father said, I suggested we
get married." Taehyung said.

"T-that's... that's very romantic." Jeongguk said, and Taehyung tsked.

"Not really. I wish I never got married." Taehyung said off-handedly, and Jeongguk wanted to ask
more. Taehyung turned to look at him. "How did you and Rosie meet?"

"We knew each other since we were children," Jeongguk explained. "We'd always been friends. I-
I really loved her. As a friend." Jeongguk mumbled, picking at his trousers. "Her parents told my
mother that they should marry us. I-I didn't really want to. I'd just gotten into King's for law. I
thought I'd be free a-and alone."

Taehyung frowned, but Jeongguk continued. "Mum was good friends with Rosie's mum. She gave
me a long talk about how I don't really know that I'm in love with Rosie." Jeongguk said, looking
down. "I-I believed her because... I don't know why. I was confused. I didn't think I loved Rosie,
but- b-but... I had no choice but to." Jeongguk said, voice wavering. "My mother said she wouldn't
let me go to London if-if I didn't marry Rosie."

"That's awful." Taehyung scoffed. "Did they force you to wed her?"

"Sort of. I feel bad, Rosie's lovely, she really is. I'm a bad husband." Jeongguk said, and Taehyung
sighed.

"My fault. I shouldn't have brought up our wives at a time like this. Cheer up, darling. We're almost
here. Don't think of reality when we're here. It'll only bring you down." Taehyung said, and
Jeongguk looked at him and then felt the car jerk to a stop.
Jeongguk walked out of the car and gasped in awe when he saw the big, lavish lake house. It lay
touching the mouth of a large lake, which had a canoe on it. The house was of light brown wood, a
dark green roof, and large glass windows with red curtains behind them. Jeongguk rushed to the
front of the house, looking at the beauty of it, the richness.

Taehyung walked behind him, looking rather pleased, a satisfied smirk on his face. "Won't it be
untidy?" Jeongguk asked.

"I'm sure the maid's cleaned it," Taehyung responded casually, and their difference made
Jeongguk's stomach stutter. He nodded, seeing Taehyung reach ahead and open the door, not
needing a key. The door opened, and Jeongguk peeked inside and let out an ohh.

The sofas were brown leather, floors decked with white fur carpet. The curtains were high and red,
a dark oak dining table in the side, a large telly in another corner, a fireplace on another side.
Jeongguk sighed out, enamored.

"Mister Kim!" A light strong French accent came, and Taehyung and Jeongguk turned and saw a
woman, probably in her late 20's, rushing over to Taehyung. She probably took care of the house
before Taehyung came for holiday.

"Ah, Anette. How lovely to see you." Taehyung smiled, and she rushed forward and hugged him
tightly. Jeongguk was a bit taken aback, and saw Taehyung hug ber back, laughing. "You've been...
erm- busy, no?" She asked, english a bit broken.

"Yes. I plan on staying for a week or two, Anette. You needn't help, you've already done enough."
Taehyung smiled. Anette smiled brightly. "You know, I learned some french for you." Taehyung
said softly.

"Really?" She asked, voice high. Taehyung hummed. "La vie est une fleur dont l’amour est
le miel." Taehyung said softly, and then leaned down and kissed her cheek.

Anette giggled brightly. They talked for a bit more, and then Anette left, giving Jeongguk a smile
too. Jeongguk watched the doors close as she left, and then sighed, looking at Taehyung, feeling
bitter.

"Isn't this place lovely?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk followed the man as they walked down
the hallways and into the bedroom. The bedroom was large, consisting of a vanity, a washroom, a
big window with a large oak window sill attached to it, and a king-sized bed. Jeongguk walked
inside.

Taehyung looked outside the windows, smiling. "I love it here. I usually come here during the
summer, really. But it's just as pleasant in the winter. The lake does calm one, doesn't it?"
Taehyung hummed, and then looked outside the window, onto the large lake.

Jeongguk hummed. Taehyung opened the window to let some fresh air in, took a deep breath, and
then let it out and smiled. "Isn't it nice Jeongguk-" Taehyung began while turning, and then froze.

Jeongguk was naked.

Laying on his bed, on his front, his backside displayed to Taehyung- who's eyes went darker at the
sight. Jeongguk kicked on leg up, looking at Taehyung with puckered lips, a sour look on his face.

"Why don't you go ask Anette?" Jeongguk muttered his clothes all on the bottom of the bed.
Jeongguk rolled over, now on his back, legs still kicked up, careless. Taehyung walked closer to
him, eyes wide, smirk playing on his lips.
Jeongguk looked at him, angry, leaning his elbows against the pillows, sitting up. "J'en ai ral le bol,
monsieur," Jeongguk muttered, tilting his chin up, eyes giving him a coy look. "T'es un bâtard."

"Fuck." Taehyung rasped, climbing onto the bed and placing his hands on Jeongguk's calves.
"You're so enticing when you speak French," Taehyung said, dipping down to press kisses to
Jeongguk's thighs.

"Vous voulez avoir des relations sexuelles avec moi, n'est-ce pas monsieur?" Jeongguk said, tilting
his head. Taehyung smirked.

"Alright, that's enough out of you my cherub," Taehyung said lowly, dipping down and pressing
their lips together.

Jeongguk hummed feverishly into his mouth, cupping the man's jaw tightly. Taehyung ran his
hands up Jeongguk's bare hips, squeezing the skin between his fingertips. Jeongguk traced his
tongue across Taehyung's bottom lip, and Taehyung breathed against his lips, hot and wet, their
mouths needily sucking on the other.

"No sex now, mon amour," Taehyung whispered, kissing Jeongguk's neck. "Let us wait till
nighttime falls."

"Nngh- I-I need you now, Taehyung. Don't want to wait till later." Jeongguk whined soulfully,
jutting his bottom lip out. Taehyung kissed his frown away, and then slapped Jeongguk's ass
playfully, making Jeongguk jolt slightly and sit upright.

"I'd love to spank you sometime." Taehyung bit his lip.

"Maybe when I've been bad," Jeongguk whispered, and Taehyung rose his eyebrows, smirking.

"Why, aren't you being rather brash today?"

"We're alone for once. Properly. I couldn't be happier." Jeongguk admitted, and Taehyung smiled
at him.

"I'm feeling rather jovial too, Jeongguk," Taehyung said, and kissed Jeongguk's nose. "Now let us
go make dinner."

After making a successful pot pie (which was slightly burnt, thanks to Taehyung) and drinking it
down with two glasses of wine each, Jeongguk lay his head against Taehyung's shoulder, both
watching the telly.

It was some movie, but both couldn't pay attention, really. Jeongguk's lips kept mouthing upon
Taehyung's jaw, and Taehyung inched his fingers around Jeongguk's waist, going lower with every
touch. Jeongguk heard the woman's voice from the tv, how she gasped out at her lover for some
reason.

Taehyung moved one hand to Jeongguk's loose trousers and pulled them down without hesitance,
making Jeongguk bite his lip, feeling dizzy. Jeongguk lay his head against Taehyung's chest,
crawling onto his lap now. Taehyung pulled Jeongguk's underwear down his thighs, falling onto
the floor.

Jeongguk faced the television, the crawl of humiliation and the pang of guilt he always received
while doing such things with Taehyung filling him head to toe as usual. Jeongguk ignored it like
always, letting his legs spread across Taehyung's lap.

The dialogues from the film continued, and Jeongguk bit his lip, seeing Taehyung grabbing at a
bottle of oil lubricant besides him. Jeongguk lolled his head back onto Taehyung's shoulder, the
scratchy noises of the movie continuing. Taehyung wrapped his arm around Jeongguk's waist and
reached his other hand between Jeongguk's legs.

"You should trust me, Jolie. I'll always love you." The man in the movie spoke, voice rough.

Jeongguk felt the first finger slide into his entrance and bit onto the sleeves of his sweater.
Jeongguk felt Taehyung drag his finger inside, letting it slide in an out sloppily before curling it.
Jeongguk whimpered, arching his back, covering his face with his hands.

"Oh, James! How could I ever forgive you!" The actress on the tv cried, hiding her face away. The
movie was black and white, so the speckled white and black dots splaying across the tv made
Jeongguk's vision hazy.

"T-Taehyu-nngh-" Jeongguk bit out, chewing around the fabric of his sweater paws. Taehyung
pressed his second finger in fully, knuckle deep, feeling his insides out, reaching them deep inside
and widening them. Jeongguk gasped, letting the sweater fall from between his lips.

"You're so beautiful, my angel," Taehyung whispered into his ear, sending tingles down his spine.
Jeongguk let out a mewled cry when Taehyung fit a third finger inside of him. Jeongguk brought
his hands up again and began mouthing on his fingers, inserting two into his mouth.

Taehyung watched as Jeongguk's legs were spread wide, one hand gripping Taehyung's arm,
another inside his own mouth. Jeongguk was spread like a flower, his petals in glory, the pink hue
on his cheeks brightening him. He was perfect, splayed like this.

"T-Taehyunf-" Jeongguk mouthed around three fingers, sucking on the digits. Drool fell from his
lips, eyes wide and needy, cock flushed hard against his stomach, thighs quivering. He was perfect.

"Fuck." Taehyung let out and then pulled his fingers out of Jeongguk. Jeongguk fell onto the sofa
on his stomach, bringing his wet fingers out of his mouth and whining. "Tae!" Jeongguk cried, and
Taehyung brought his hands down Jeongguk's sides and then lifted his hips up until his ass was in
the air, thick thighs spread wide, giving a perfect view to his entrance.

"God damn it, love. You're so fucking beautiful," Taehyung growled, lust driven. Jeongguk moved
his face to the side so his cheek was pressed against the sofa, arms uselessly by his side. Jeongguk
waited for Taehyung, waited compliantly, waiting for Taehyung to make the first move, first step.

Taehyung reached forward and saw the way Jeongguk's blue knitted sweater fell down his beck,
showing the dimples at the small of his back. Jeongguk brought the sweater down to chew on the
neck of the blue wool- and Taehyung hungrily licked his lips.

"I could orgasm just watching you stay like this, Jeongguk." Taehyung rasped out, and Jeongguk
looked at him, pleadingly, lips wettening the wool stuck to his lips.

"Pleath-" Jeongguk stammered around the cloth, and Taehyung reached forward and brought his
hardening cock out, slipping on a condom and overcoating it with lubricant. Jeongguk gasped out a
breath when he felt Taehyung press the head of his cock into his entrance.

Jeongguk's pink entrance fluttered around Taehyung, and Taehyung watched with a grin as
Jeongguk's hole pulled him inside, squeezing tightly around him, sensitive to every inch. Taehyung
put his hands on Jeongguk's asscheeks and pulled them wider apart, watching his cock disappear
inside of the boy.

"Fuck. Fuck- wow, god- you're so fucking gorgeous," Taehyung breathed out, seeing with
fascination as Jeongguk clenched around him, hole mouthing hungrily for his cock to fill it.
Taehyung put his hands on Jeongguk's hips and pushed in further.

"T-Tae-!" Jeongguk cried, tears in his eyes, fists clenched tightly above his head. Jeongguk felt the
brush of Taehyung's length against his prostate and arched his back higher, raising his ass higher
up, face pressing against the sofa until only muffled moans left his lips.

"Pretty- pretty, so pretty," Taehyung said, biting his lips while beginning to fluently fuck him.
Jeongguk's thighs trembled with every thrust into him- the boy mewling into the pillow pressed to
his face with every slam.

"I love seeing you like this. Love- love the way you-" Taehyung gritted his teeth, sliding his cock
out until the head was resting against the rim, and then shoving himself back in. Jeongguk
screamed out at that, raising his head up and letting Taehyung hear his pretty moans.

"Louder. N-no one can hear you here, love. It's all you." Taehyung whispered, and Jeongguk's
moans filled the crevice of the wooden house, shaking its contents. Jeongguk was vocal,
sensitive, beautiful, voice like a harp's strum. His pleasured cries were only more enticing to
Taehyung's ears.

"G-gonna cum-" Jeongguk mumbled out, hands reaching down to press against his face. Jeongguk
whimpered into his hands, began moving his ass back to match the pace of Taehyung's thrusts.
Jeongguk felt humiliated at this, felt disgustingly awe-struck by how badly his body, his mind, his
heart, every part of him- how badly they wanted this.

"Fuck. M'not going to touch you-" Taehyung bit back a moan. "Cum for me, little angel."

"N-no! Tae- Tae I've never- never done that before- ah!" Jeongguk let out at the sudden jolt into his
prostate. "A-ah-!" Jeongguk let outpitched, and Taehyung molded his hands onto the boy's
asscheeks.

Jeongguk finally came, unknowingly rubbing his cock against his fist which was clad with the long
sleeves of his sweater. Jeongguk spurted the cum and it hit his own chest and chin from how he
was positioned. Jeongguk breathed heavily, looked fucked out, eyes hazy, cheeks red, chest
heaving, hair damp and sticking to his forehead.

Jeongguk was suddenly turned around, facing Taehyung. Taehyung leaned down, equally as red.
"You don't know how beautiful you are, do you?"

Jeongguk blushed brightly at the statement, brought his hands up to cradle Taehyung's jaw as the
older looked into Jeongguk's honey brown eyes and fucked him. Jeongguk whimpered out, biting
his lip and looked up at the man with widened eyes. Taehyung suddenly pulled out of him.

"N-no-" Jeongguk pleaded, and Taehyung hurriedly rolled the condom off his hard cock, letting it
fall to the floor. Jeongguk was confused, but then Taehyung tapped Jeongguk's hand. "Pull me off,"
Taehyung said, and Jeongguk was a little confused but put his smaller hand around Taehyung's
large cock and began moving his hand up and down.

Jeongguk had no rhythm, no pace, just quickly moved his hand, looked up at Taehyung with parted
damp lips, seeing the man close to climax. "Fuck-" Taehyung bit out, and then gripped Jeongguk's
thighs and pulled them up. Jeongguk let out a cry of confusion at the sudden doing, but then saw
Taehyung lean forward and release all over Jeongguk's stomach.

Jeongguk felt a squeak leave his lips at that, and Taehyung's eyes glimmer at how Jeongguk's pale
soft skin looked speckled with semen. Taehyung got off the sofa for a second, pulling his pants
back on and picking the condom up with disgust to throw it into a dustbin. He turned around to turn
the telly off, but when he turned around, he saw Jeongguk.

The cum which was earlier pooled on Jeongguk's stomach was now spread around his chest and up
and a bit on his lips, and from how Jeongguk was sucking on his fingers, Taehyung could imagine
a bit of his offspring was on the boy's tongue as well.

"Fuck." Taehyung cursed, and Jeongguk realized Taehyung was looking and brought his hand out,
looking humiliated. "Like it that much, do you?"

Jeongguk nodded, shy. "L-love it. Thank you." Jeongguk said softly, and Taehyung reached
forward to help the boy sit up. Taehyung gripped his hips, kissing the boy gently. Jeongguk
preened, kissing him back and almost folding up, propping his legs around Taehyung's waist.
Taehyung reached down and picked him up bridal style to not smear the cum which was painted so
beautifully over his torso.

Jeongguk was carried into the washroom, where Taehyung sat him onto a counter and cleaned him
up. Jeongguk giggled drowsily, and then felt Taehyung carry him back to the bedroom and lay him
down onto the bed, where they both fell asleep quickly, content.

**
 Chapter 14
Chapter Notes

this chapter includes homophobia, period typical. jus warning, if everyone needs it!

**

Jeongguk woke up with Taehyung's lips on his cock.

Jeongguk tipped his head back, letting out a small mewl and fumbling his hands down to grasp
Taehyung's blonde locks. Taehyung looked up at him from where he was peacefully nestled
between Jeongguk's legs, sucking on his cock which was hardening slowly.

"N-nngh- a-already?" Jeongguk whimpered, and Taehyung tilted his head to suck at the side of his
shaft, lick up his length. Jeongguk looked at Taehyung with a bitten lip and saw as his cock
hardened with Taehyung's lips around them.

"Mmm. You just feel so good, darling," Taehyung rasped in his morning voice, kissing up his
length, making Jeongguk's thighs rise up and grip the sides of Taehyung's face, tightening his head
in between his thighs.

"Ah-" Jeongguk let out, bucking his hips up gently. Taehyung was plainly suckling on the top of
his cock. Jeongguk whined. "Y-you woke me up for this. At least do it properly."

"Giving me orders, are we?" Taehyung said, looking up with his deep glare. Jeongguk bit his lip.

"No. Sorry Mr. Kim," Jeongguk whispered, and then saw Taehyung grin and take him fully,
deepthroating him till the base of his cock and making Jeongguk gasp out.

They'd been in France for three days. They'd gone canoeing, they'd fished, they'd baked. It was like
an escape from reality. From the burdens of the society they belonged to. Here it was just them.
Just them and no fear, no outsiders, no pressure from their surroundings. Just them.

Jeongguk finally came down Taehyung's throat, letting out a startled squeak as he did. Taehyung
took it in willfully and then dragged his lips off Jeongguk's softening cock utterly slow as if
purposefully making the younger tremble. He finally pulled away and glanced up to look at
Jeongguk, who looked disheveled.

"What's the plan for today?" Jeongguk croaked, head hitting the cushion.

"Don't know. Just wanted to lay in bed with you, honestly," Taehyung said, crawling up and lying
down beside him.

"Well then- what-what was that for?" Jeongguk scoffed, turning to face him. "You've wasted my
use! I won't be able to orgasm for another few hours," Jeongguk groaned, stuffing his head in
Taehyung's neck.

"I'll make good use of you, my angel," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk looked up at him. "And who
said anything about sex? Let's let loose." Taehyung whispered, and Jeongguk hummed, smiling.

"If you say so, Taehyung. But let's shower first. You've gotten me all filthy," Jeongguk tutted,
rolling over to get off the bed. Taehyung sat up, watching Jeongguk walk to the washroom, a sway
in his hips, his ass looking cute, probably sore from the night before.

"I've gotten you all filthy? You're the one that came in my mouth," Taehyung said, and then got off
the bed as well, following Jeongguk into the washroom. "Though you taste rather sweet."

"I think it's because I eat a lot of fruit." Jeongguk hummed, and Taehyung snickered. Taehyung
looked at the mirror, and Jeongguk watched as the man just looked at himself, turning his face a
little to fix his hair. Taehyung took a step back, admiring himself, and then turning to look at
Jeongguk.

"You think you're rather handsome, don't you?" Jeongguk said, amused. Taehyung rose his
eyebrow.

"Doesn't everyone think I'm handsome?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk couldn't even deny it.
Taehyung stripped off his shirt, and Jeongguk turned the knob on, stepping into the bathtub.
Jeongguk watched as Taehyung stripped nude, and then looked at Jeongguk, who was already
nude.

Minutes later. Taehyung was sitting in the bathtub, wet, smirking to himself with his arms laid
across the sides of the bathtub as Jeongguk straddled his lap, smiling at the older while lathering
shampoo into his hair.

"Your hair's nice," Jeongguk commented and bit his lip. "Always wanted blonde hair."

"I think you're perfect with brown," Taehyung said, head tipped back into Jeongguk's hands.
Jeongguk sat on Taehyung's thigh, looking at the man in front of him with a small sigh. He could
feel his heart risen at the sight.

"Come. Let me do you now." Taehyung whispered, and Jeongguk nodded. Taehyung took some
shampoo into his palm and downed it onto Jeongguk's brown hair. Jeongguk giggled when
Taehyung massaged his scalp, the soap around him a pretty purple.

"You like this, kitten?" Taehyung asked softly, and Jeongguk nodded, leaning forward, placing his
hands onto Taehyung's broad shoulders. They lathered each other with shampoo, and Taehyung
even put some on Jeongguk's nose, which made the younger giggle once more.

They quickly washed off and bathed, and then got dressed in comfortable clothes. They found
themselves, sometime later, sitting in the living room while the record player sang Doris Day into
the room. Taehyung held Jeongguk tightly in his arms, while the younger hummed along to the
song.

"You sound like you'd sing beautifully," Taehyung said softly, and Jeongguk looked at him. "Sing
for me."

Jeongguk blushed. "Stars fading but I linger on, dear," Jeongguk sang along softly, and leaned
forward to kiss Taehyung on the lips. "Still craving your kiss,".

"I was correct. You sound beautiful. I wonder what you'd look like on a stage." Taehyung
murmured, and Jeongguk blushed, leaning into him.

"Don't you wish we could stay here forever?" Jeongguk asked, looking outside and seeing the
breeze dance past the flowers and make them twirl in its wonder. "Just us. No one else." Jeongguk
said.

"I wish it were that easy, love," Taehyung said, squeezing him tightly.

"Do you bring other women here?" Jeongguk asked after a beat.

"No," Taehyung said, kissing Jeongguk's jaw. "Only you. Only want you here."

Jeongguk wasn't sure. Wasn't sure if Taehyung really meant all this, or just brought him here
because it'd be easier than to do it all back in London. He wasn't sure about Taehyung and his
intentions.

"What do you want from me, Taehyung?" Jeongguk asked, head lolling into Taehyung's shoulder.
"Tell me if you just want me for sex. I'll understand." Jeongguk whispered.

Taehyung kept quiet for a bit. Jeongguk looked at him, heart filling with a tinge of uneasiness.
Taehyung looked away. "I don't know."

Jeongguk hummed and then felt Taehyung wrap his arms around his waist. "Let's not... think about
such things. It's lovely here." Taehyung said, rather quickly. Jeongguk nodded, not saying much.
Taehyung looked at him.

"Do you see those flowers outside by the lake, my love?" Taehyung whispered, and Jeongguk
looked at him. He shook his head, playing with his fingers. "It's a moonflower. Aren't they
beautiful?"

"Yes. Quite." Jeongguk said softly. Taehyung leaned up to draw a thumb down his cheek. "They
remind me of you, my love."

Jeongguk hid his face in Taehyung's neck. "You're pretty, soft, dainty. Like a moonflower. Your
eyes are cloudless climes and starry skies," Taehyung whispered into his skin, words gentle.
"You're mellow, thus gentle in the light. Beautiful." Taehyung ended, and Jeongguk's breath
hitched.

He tightened his fingers on Taehyung's shirt, looking at him with his large eyes, a wild yearning
for something unspeakable stirring in them. He'd never felt so attached, so in need for someone
before. He kept quiet, just went back to hiding his face in Taehyung's chest.

"Are you alright?" Taehyung asked.

"Yes." Jeongguk breathed, and Taehyung tingled his fingers down the arch of his back and made
the boy look up, their breaths tingling.

"I've never- never felt so enamored by a man." Taehyung spoke, a blinding honesty in his words.
Jeongguk gulped.

"Me neither." Jeongguk replied, soft.

"I fear it." Taehyung said, voice smaller. "Strongly."

"I do too." Jeongguk said, looking up. He gulped. "I-it's not right."
Taehyung nodded. "It isn't. But I crave for it. For you. Every inch of you, I crave. Even when I'm
with Veronica, I wish she were you. You hold your head up high, dignified, noble. I admire that.
You don't adhere to me, yet you still... have a fondness in your words." Taehyung whispered, and
Jeongguk blinked his long lashes.

"Taehyung," Jeongguk breathed out, and then felt Taehyung tightening his hold around him. "I'm
sorry," Jeongguk whispered.

"Why are you apologizing?"

"I can't help myself." Jeongguk said, looking at him closely, heart racing. "You drive me mad. I
won't be a-able to control myself a-around you. You're beautiful, you're everything I've ever
wanted but- but never known I needed. I'll ruin everything. I'm sorry."

Taehyung shook his head. "Don't say that," Taehyung said, rushed, eyes softened at Jeongguk's
paled face. "What's wrong?"

"I know y-you only want sex." Jeongguk said, weak. "And we're married to women. And
we're men. I know that. Yet still I-I can't... can't contain myself from falling for you." Jeongguk
said, closing his eyes.

Taehyung stilled. "I'm sorry." Jeongguk repeated. "But I-I can't continue with this. I'll only fall for
you and so in love. You deserve someone who isn't so foolish." Jeongguk whispered, climbing off
Taehyung's lap, and turning headily to walk away.

"Jeongguk." Taehyung said, voice tightened. Jeongguk rushed into the bedroom, towards the
window sill. He leaned his elbows against it, looking at himself in the reflection of the glass pane.
Jeongguk bit his lip. He'd ruin everything.

"Jeongguk," Taehyung said again, and Jeongguk turned to look at him. Taehyung looked upset.
Jeongguk's breath hitched.

"I'm sorry, I don't want you to get-" Jeongguk began, but Taehyung rushed forward and wrapped
his arms around Jeongguk's waist.

Jeongguk wrapped his arms around the man's neck, unsure, but steady. Jeongguk felt his arms
tighten.

"It doesn't matter." Taehyung said in a whisper. "Que sera, sera." Taehyung continued, gentle.
Jeongguk closed his eyes. "Whatever will be, will be. There's nothing we can do to change what
will come." Taehyung whispered.

"You aren't mad?"

"No, darling. Never." Taehyung said softly, kissing his forehead. "Let's go for a walk. And then
tonight we'll go for dinner. Does that sound nice, my love?"

"Yes. Very." Jeongguk replied, smiling. Taehyung smiled back. Both kissed for a few seconds, lips
melding into each other's warmth.

*
"Reservation. For two." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk stood behind him, nervous. Taehyung was
in a black shirt and trousers, looking handsome as always. Jeongguk felt less handsome than
Taehyung in a simple white shirt- but thought of moonflowers, and got a blush on his cheeks.

"Ah, yes monsieur. Private room, yes?" The man said, and Taehyung hummed, hands in his
pockets. Jeongguk envied how domineering Taehyung's stance was, how easily he caught the
attention of those around him. He was utterly handsome, after all.

The man at the front of the restaurant led the two through the dark wooden room where tables
were scattered, men and women dressed wealthily, drinking champagne and exuding aristocracy.
Jeongguk felt out of place, as usual, following Taehyung like a puppy.

"Private room?" Jeongguk asked to Taehyung, who nodded, giving him a sly smirk.

They reached a small room in the corner, cordoned off, sealed by a door. They entered the room,
and Jeongguk gasped a little. A little white round table sat in the middle, along with two black
chairs on either side. A small pot full of roses in the middle, and a chandelier on the top.

"We apologize. When you said private room, we assumed... differently." The man chuckled
wearily, and Taehyung hummed.

"That's alright. We'd like to order two orders of the best steak you have, the best appetizer, and
your most expensive wine. Knock before entering. And don't come back unless asked to."
Taehyung said, tone calm, yet sending the waiter into a frenzy.

"Y-yes sir." He nodded quickly, hurrying away. Jeongguk giggled at him, seeing how Taehyung
eased when the door closed, leaving the two alone.

"I find you rather charming when you're so commanding," Jeongguk said, and Taehyung gripped
the small of his back.

"Why wouldn't you, love?" Taehyung grinned and then leaned in to place a kiss on his mouth.
Jeongguk opened his mouth in invitation, gripping Taehyung's shirt and letting Taehyung roam his
tongue around the crevices of Jeongguk's parted lips. Jeongguk whimpered into the older's mouth,
leaving Taehyung gripping his shirt tighter.

A knock on the door broke their stance, making both pull away. The door opened, and the waiter
stood on the other side, holding a menu. "Sir, would you like to glance at the other options for the
wine? I think you should check-"

"What did I say?" Taehyung asked, voice deep. Jeongguk looked up at him with big eyes, glazed.

"T-the most- um- the most expensive-"

"I wouldn't like to repeat myself. Most expensive means as it entails." Taehyung said lowly. The
waiter nodded meekly and walked off. Taehyung sighed and then looked at Jeongguk, who began
giggling.

Jeongguk sat down on the chair, enjoying the dim lighting, how it was just the two of them, alone.
"Where did you learn to be so awfully confident?" Jeongguk asked with a tilt to his head.

"Grew up with two older brothers, an army general, and a woman who commanded her way by all
means. Everyone wanted their way in my house. You just had to learn how to get it. Plus, my older
brothers get hilariously offended when I got girls better than they did. So I did it every time I say a
girl." Taehyung snickered.
"Yes, I can see that. You've flirted with almost every woman we've come across." Jeongguk
mumbled, tone slightly stingy.

Taehyung chuckled. "No, I haven't."

"Yes... you have."

"Name one instance."

"At the airport with the woman who gave us the tickets and then the flight attendant. Then with
Anette. Then that woman at the pastry shop we went to yesterday. Then the woman at the-"

"I wasn't flirting with them!" Taehyung scoffed, offended. "I was merely making conversation!"

"Is that what you call making conversation? Taehyung, I'm afraid you don't know how you come
across to people," Jeongguk laughed, and Taehyung looked confused.

Jeongguk sighed, and then looked away for a few seconds, and then suddenly looked back at
Taehyung, eyes darker, sultry, jaw tilted up. He brought his hand up to his face to stroke his chin,
and then bit his lower lip seductively.

"What are you doing?" Taehyung asked, deadpanned.

"Oh I'm sorry," Jeongguk rasped, and then leaned in a little. "I'm afraid I got lost in your
eyes, darling,"

"Are you mocking me," Taehyung said, raising his eyebrow.

"I don't know. Am I?" Jeongguk asked, raising his eyebrow as well. Taehyung started laughing,
putting his hand on Jeongguk's and making the younger begin giggling.

"That was... frightfully accurate. I just don't realize when I'm flirting, honestly! I've just gotten so
used to slipping in a compliment or two when talking to people. It's become natural. It's my tone of
voice." Taehyung sighed.

There was a knock on the door again, and Taehyung told him to come in. The waiter came inside
with two glasses of wine and a bottle, and the appetizers. He set them down, poured the wine, and
then left.

Jeongguk laughed. "So two brothers, huh? That must've been lively."

"Oh, it was. You've met them." Taehyung said casually, stirring his wine. Jeongguk's eyes
widened. "I-I have?"

"Those two men at that house party. You know- Namjoon and Seokjin. They're my older brothers.
Didn't the last name sound familiar?" Taehyung cocked his head.

Jeongguk gasped, and then let out a bashful oh. "O-of course. But you called them colleagues!
They were scary, too. Is everyone in your family so headstrong and calculatingly overconfident?"

"Yes," Taehyung said, and both started laughing. "What about yours?"

"Quite opposite from yours, actually. Never had a father. He died when I was a child, at war."
Jeongguk said, voice steady. Taehyung frowned for a second, but Jeongguk didn't look as if he
wanted to talk about. "My mother lived with her mother, and my aunt visited quite often."
"So you grew up around women?"

"Yes," Jeongguk said, looking away. "They raised me well, I suppose. I owe a lot to them. I'm not
upset at my mother for forcing me to marry Rosie. My mother, my aunt, granny- they love Rosie!
She's everything one wants for their son."

"My mother despises Veronica. Called her a skank once. I laughed when she did. Both women got
quite mad at me." Taehyung said as if confused as to why they did.

"My mother always wanted me to be the man of the house. Even at an early age. She'd make me do
a lot of the work. She wouldn't console me when I cried, told me to be a proper man. She'd force
me into sports and other such things." Jeongguk mumbled, chewing on the inside of his cheek.

"I'm sorry," Taehyung said softly, putting his hand on Jeongguk's. "I sometimes feel like I've never
been the man of the house. I wish I was, at times." Taehyung mumbled off-handedly.

The food finally arrived. Both ate, growing needier for one another as time passed. Foot taps and
gentle feathery finger touches turned to Taehyung tightly holding his hand while both drank down
glass after glass of wine. Jeongguk didn't even realize he'd scooted his chair so close to Taehyung
until dessert arrived, and Jeongguk was on Taehyung's lap.

"My love," Taehyung said, hands touching Jeongguk's small waist. Jeongguk smiled down at him,
cupping his jaw. Jeongguk kissed him gently, opening his mouth wide for him to enter once more.
Taehyung hummed and fucked his tongue into the boy's gaping lips, making the younger preen
and flush.

Jeongguk felt Taehyung sucking on his bottom lip, and Jeongguk pressed their foreheads together-
feeling Taehyung's hands securely on his ass. Jeongguk hummed into Taehyung's mouth,
whimpering.

"Jeongguk we shouldn't. Not out here." Taehyung said gently, and Jeongguk whined in
disappointment but nodded, knowing it wasn't right. Jeongguk got off Taehyung's lap, trotting off
to his seat and sitting down.

Jeongguk's seat was still close to Taehyung's when the waiter walked in. He didn't notice
Taehyung's large hand on Jeongguk's thigh, how it moved up while he carelessly took the money
out of his wallet and placed it onto the table. The waiter thanked them, and then Taehyung and
Jeongguk got up to walk out of the restaurant.

"Excuse me, sir." The manager of the restaurant said, walking up to him, eyes low. "I think you
forgot to pay the proper price."

"Did I?" Taehyung snickered. Jeongguk looked confused. "Go ahead, Jeongguk. I'll be out in a
second." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk nodded with a smile, wanting to go outside to the fresh air
anyway.

Taehyung sighed and took his wallet out. "What did I-"

"I'd like you to know," The manager said, voice low. "That these sort of revolting acts are not
permitted to take place in our restaurant," The manager said, and Taehyung tensed.

He kept quiet, looking at him slowly. The manager looked angered. "The usage of a private room
is not to execute such horrendous desires, Mr. Kim."

Taehyung wasn't sure how he knew. How he found out. Except, of course, perhaps the door had
creaked open lightly when the two were making out heavily. They must've not noticed. How could
he have not realized? Taehyung took his wallet out, not speaking snarkily or making an
overconfident comment for once.

"How much?" Taehyung said dryly.

"We don't want money-"

"If you wanted to call the police, you would've done so already," Taehyung growled lowly, looking
at the man with darkened eyes. "Tell me how much to pay you, and make it quick," Taehyung
snapped.

The man said the number. It was awfully high, idiotically. Taehyung took it out of his wallet and
handed it to the man, and then walked out, heavy feeling in his stomach.

Taehyung saw Jeongguk on the walkway, smiling to himself, looking up at the moon. Jeongguk
caught sight of Taehyung and smiled wider. "Hi. What happened?"

"Nothing," Taehyung said, taking a cigarette out of his packet and a lighter, lighting it and keeping
it hung loosely in his mouth. Jeongguk called for a taxi, and they both got in, and Jeongguk told the
man the address.

The car began driving, and Taehyung rolled down the windows, letting the smoke out. Jeongguk
sat close to him. Jeongguk looked at him peculiarly, seeing how handsome he looked with the
moonshine glowing on his tan skin. Jeongguk put his hand on Taehyung's, lacing their fingers
together.

Taehyung pulled his hand away rather fast, and then looked at Jeongguk. "Not outside," Taehyung
said sharply, and Jeongguk stilled and nodded, scooting away.

Both reached the house, and Taehyung walked out of the car quickly. Jeongguk was confused and
paid the driver from his own wallet. Jeongguk scurried out and followed Taehyung back inside.

"Taehyung what's wrong?"

Taehyung turned around, holding his cigarette low. "It's no use," Taehyung said, gruffly. Jeongguk
looked confused, eyes big.

"It's no use falling for me. It won't go anywhere, Jeongguk." Taehyung said, low. Jeongguk felt a
hitch in his stomach and furrowed his eyebrows. "It's only going to hurt you."

"Where- where is this coming from?" Jeongguk asked, hands bunching up.

"What are we doing?" Taehyung chuckled weakly, dropping the cigarette to the ground, watching
it still lit, glowing. "There's no fucking point to any of this, Jeongguk. To us. We're men. The- the
consequences of it all, it'll hurt us more than you can imagine-"

"I don't care!" Jeongguk said, reaching forward and stepping onto the cigarette, crushing it into
ashes. Jeongguk put his hands to Taehyung's shirt. "I know we're men. And I know of the
consequences. I just- I don't care anymore."

"Baby, you should. We need to. I can't pretend like this isn't wrong anymore." Taehyung said
softly, closing his eyes. Jeongguk leaned forward, pressing his forehead up to Taehyung's.

"It is wrong. We're wrong. W-we'll burn in hell," Jeongguk said, voice wavering. Taehyung opened
his eyes. "But I'll burn in hell for an eternity if it means I can be with you."

Taehyung snickered out. "You don't mean that, Jeongguk. It's just infatuation. It'll pass, but it'll do
you harm. We should put it to its grave now before it haunts us. Please, Jeongguk- I only want this
for our own good-" Taehyung said softly, kissing his ear gently, holding him in his hands.

"I-I don't want to say goodbye. I know you don't either. I just- I like you so much, Taehyung. I want
to be around you constantly. I feel less vacant around you as if you're something that's been absent
my whole life," Jeongguk said weakly, arms wrapped around his neck. "You- I need you. So
badly."

Taehyung closed his eyes. "I don't want to say goodbye either. I-" Taehyung chuckled, dropping
his head to Jeongguk's shoulder. "Damnnit. I think you've gotten me too, Jeongguk."

Jeongguk looked up at him, head tilted. Taehyung smiled. "I think I've fallen for you too. Quite
gravely."

Jeongguk giggled out, cheeks turning red. "Y-you mean that? You aren't just saying it to-"

"Shush," Taehyung said, feeling a lot lighter, reaching down to kiss his small lips. "You're the best
one I've ever had. I think there's a reason why."

Jeongguk pressed their lips together, and Taehyung reached down and lifted the boy up, kissing up
at him. Taehyung carried him to the bedroom, where they stumbled onto the bed and fell atop it,
lips still pressed together. Jeongguk clawed at Taehyung's clothes, whining into Taehyung's
mouth.

Both undressed, naked in the moonlight. Taehyung hovered on top of him, pressing chaste kisses
down his neck. He opened him up slowly, stirring the younger until he went from a whining
mouthful to a whimpering squirming mess, begging with Taehyung's fingers inside of him.

It was beautiful for Taehyung, to break him down like this. To see his eyes grow large, dazzling,
mouth agape, lips pink and wet. How he'd grab onto any part of Taehyung, dig his nails in and
squeak out incoherent words. How he'd let out his loud, vocal cries at how Taehyung would press
his cock in.

It was beautiful to break him down into a teary, fucked out, squirming mess who bit his lip too
hard and whimpered too beautifully.

But it was more beautiful to bring him back up. To thrust into him slowly, as if pumping into him
just to watch the stuttering mewl that'd leave his lips with every slam. To finally reach his prostate
and watch tears reach to his eyes, how he'd begin trembling, reaching small hands up to clutch
Taehyung's jaw.

How he'd hastily press their lips together, and Taehyung would continue, continue stirring his
beautiful boy like this. Until Jeongguk was cumming, arching his back and grasping onto the
mattress. And then how he'd melt onto Taehyung's arms, fallen down onto the plush bed, chest
heaving, moonlight glowing on him.

How he'd let Taehyung encircle his waist with his arms and fuck into him slowly but rough,
making sure he was bubbling from oversensitivity. Then he'd cum as well, and the younger would
kiss him through it. And then how he'd giggle at Taehyung and kiss him, falling onto his side.

Jeongguk lay against his chest. "Goodnight." He whispered, bodies tangled.

"Goodnight, my love," Taehyung whispered back, kissing his forehead and looking at Jeongguk for
a few seconds.

He really was his best, his perfect, most beautiful darling. Taehyung wondered why he'd ever slept
with anyone else. Wishes he'd found the boy sooner.

**
 Chapter 15
Chapter Notes

NOTE : this chapter includes instances of dubious consent and emotional abuse.
viewer discretion is advised.

**

Jeongguk kissed Taehyung on the mouth eagerly, their lips wet and breaths fusing with one
another, sending warmth throughout their bodies.

Jeongguk pulled away and leaned his forehead against Taehyung's. "I don't want to go back
home."

"I don't want to either," Taehyung whispered, brushing his thumb over Jeongguk's fingers. "But we
can't overstay, darling. We've got responsibilities back home."

Jeongguk tsked, looked at Taehyung, who looked morose as well. Both had to go to the airport and
take the flight back to London. Jeongguk had school the next day, and he already knew he wouldn't
see Taehyung for another few weeks or so. Both were always so busy with work.

The week spent in France had been phenomenal. Sex every day, sometimes twice. They ate lovely
food, they canoed, they took hot water baths, they painted, they even did pottery. It was amazing.
Jeongguk's sure he's been smiling this whole time. Taehyung had grown closer, never wanting to
leave Jeongguk's side. He kept the boy close, always having his arms around his waist or lips on
his mouth.

Both had grown attached. Too soon, too fast. It wasn't good for either, but they didn't have the
willpower to stop it.

The drive to the airport consisted of Jeongguk having his head on Taehyung's shoulder, and
Taehyung pressing kisses to his forehead every other moment. There was a partition between the
back seats and the driver's, thankfully. In the airplane, they spoke softly, exchanging as many
words and stories to remember these memories forever. When they reached London, the car came
to pick them up- Taehyung's driver looking at them wearily. Jeongguk paid no mind, just sat on
Taehyung's lap and kissed him throughout.

"Drop him to his house," Taehyung said, and Jackson nodded, driving past Taehyung's house and
towards the smaller flats. Jeongguk whined to himself, looking at Taehyung with his big doll eyes.

"Goodbye. Meet me soon, please." Jeongguk whispered. Taehyung smiled softly.

"I will. I promise." Taehyung reassured, kissing his cheek. Jeongguk beamed up at the man and
grudgingly got out of the car. Jackson rushed out of the car and handed Jeongguk his suitcase-
which Jeongguk took kindly, and then turned around and walked into his house.
Jeongguk turned and saw the car drive off, and then before he could open the door of his house, it
opened itself.

"Jeongguk," A voice came. Jeongguk looked, and then frowned when he didn't see his petite
blonde wife.

"Jimin?" Jeongguk asked, seeing the black haired boy standing with his hand on the door. "What
are you doing here?"

"Jeongguk's home?" A voice chirped from inside, and then Rosie barrelled down the hallway and
towards the doorway and smiled widely when she saw Jeongguk. "Jeonggukie! Oh, you're back!
I've missed you!" Rosie gasped, hugging him tightly.

Jeongguk hugged her back awkwardly, but then gulped. "Hello, Rosie. Fancy seeing Jimin here,"
Jeongguk said, and Jimin laughed sheepishly.

"Yes, um- I've been ringing up your telephone for the whole week. You didn't tell me you were
going on some fishing trip. I thought you'd come over to the pub, you know." Jimin spoke, his
accent a bit posher.

"I'm sorry. It- it must've slipped my mind." Jeongguk said, giving him a small smile.

"That's aright. Rosie made me some tea. I'll get going now, I just wanted to make sure you were
alright. You're coming to school tomorrow, right? We can go to the pub after," Jimin said, smiling.
Jeongguk nodded, and then Jimin ruffled his hair lightly and walked past him, out of their flat.

"Bye!" Rosie called and then smiled up at Jeongguk, who stepped inside the house, closing the
door behind him.

"So! How was it? France must've been beautiful at this time of the year, yeah?" Rosie asked,
helping him take his coat off. Jeongguk nodded.

"Oh, it was! We went canoeing many times. There were these beautiful flowers outside the cabin,
Rosie. You'd never find them here in London. And oh- the night sky! So full of stars!" Jeongguk
gushed, clasping his hands together.

"How was it with Taehyung? Isn't he a bit cocky and cold? Veronica told me he must be giving
you a hard time," Rosie giggled. Jeongguk slung his coat on the chair of the dining table and
smiled to himself.

"He did give me a bit of a hard time, I reckon," Jeongguk said softly, biting his lip.

"I've made you dinner. Shephard's pie, the way you like it." Rosie said, and Jeongguk gave her a
small smile and saw the steaming hot food on the table and sat down, hungry.

"You must've not had any telephones there, huh? You didn't call once," Rosie said, tilting her head.
Jeongguk nodded. He was lying, there was a telephone. Rosie hummed.

Suddenly she closed in a little bit. Her body was clad in a nightgown, and she began toying with her
hair, looking a little fearful. "I-I hope you weren't upset about Jimin coming over. I'd never had a
man over without you being here-"

"Mhm- This shepherd's pie is really good! Did you add something to it?" Jeongguk asked, eating
the food quickly.
Rosie paused. "Oh, um- I melted some cheese over the top. Nonetheless, you must've been
mortified to see your best mate in the same flat as your wife! How atrocious, I just can't imagine-"
Rosie began, shaking her head. Rosie was tensed but then saw as Jeongguk continued eating, not
looking as 'mortified' as she thought he'd be.

"Aren't you... bothered?" Rosie asked, voice small. Jeongguk looked up at her, and then picked up
a napkin to wipe the corner of his lip.

"No," Jeongguk said, and then took a bigger bite and hummed. "Oh the beef tastes delicious,"
Jeongguk added, smiling at her.

Rosie's shoulders fell. "Jimin's quite the- the womanizer though, isn't he? Didn't you say he'd slept
with quite a few women?"

"Yes. Funny chap. But oh well, he thinks it's strange how early I got married," Jeongguk chuckled,
taking the last bite of his shepherd's pie. "But he's taken quite the liking to you. He told me his
mum was a nurse, too. Quite the noble profession, he says."

"Yes, he said I was quite pretty, too," Rosie added, raising her eyebrows at Jeongguk. Jeongguk
just nodded, and then drank down his water. Rosie looked at Jeongguk closely, as if waiting for a
reaction, but the boy just looked up, untethered.

"Is there any wine?"

Rosie looked at him in disbelief. "So you're really not upset by this affliction? You know- my- my
friend at the hospital, her husband hit one of the doctor's for trying to get close to her!" Rosie said.

"Oh. How... foolish." Jeongguk hummed, standing up and walking to the bedroom. Rosie stood
there, shoulders drooping.

She wishes he were more possessive at times. More caring. More rugged, manly, a little bossy,
perhaps. It was all so attractive when she found men like such in movies and books. Jeongguk
wasn't even pinched by the fact that his best friend was in the house with his wife. Although
nothing happened- Jimin just had some tea and left. But still, Rosie expected a little bit of anger, at
least.

She washed the dishes and then walked back to the bedroom, opening it to the find Jeongguk
standing in front of the dresser, dressed in a rather large white shirt and no trousers, putting cold
face cream in spots on his face. She watched as he slowly applied the cream to his face and then
brushed his hair neatly, smiling at his reflection.

Rosie walked up to him, watching him in the mirror with large eyes. She leaned into Jeongguk,
grasping his shirt in her hand. Jeongguk looked at her and frowned, but then saw her leaning into
his chest. He opened his mouth to speak, but then saw her look up.

"You smell odd," Rosie said, voice soft.

Jeongguk reached away from her, patting down his shirt. "Yes. Men's fragrances and soaps are
too... harsh for my skin. The scent is bulgarian rose. Isn't it nice?" Jeongguk asked her.

Rosie chuckled to herself, dry. "Yes... yes. It's- um- nice. You smell like a woman." Rosie stated
blankly, looking to see how he'd react. Jeongguk nodded, walking to his bed and lying down onto
it, pulling the covers onto himself.

Rosie turned the lamp light off and lay down on the bed too, moving closer to him. "Jeongguk,"
She said gently, reaching over to kiss his cheek. "I missed you dearly," She continued, kissing him
on the lips.

Jeongguk kissed her back. Rosie put her hands over his shoulders, hoping he'd grab hold of her and
roll himself on top, kiss her gently and all over. Instead, he made a small sound and then moved
away.

"I'm tired, Rosie. Goodnight." Jeongguk said softly, curling into a ball, hands clutching his blanket
as he slid his eyes shut.

Rosie sighed to herself. "Goodnight." She repeated, sleeping close to his body, eyes closing.

"Ah, you're back," Veronica stated when she saw the blond man walk into the living room. Jackson
scurried behind him to place his suitcase in his study. Taehyung strode towards the couches, seeing
Veronica sitting against the leather couch, sipping on warm rum.

"Did you change the house while I was gone?" Taehyung asked, looking around with a frown.

"Yes. I threw out those old vases we had. Got new ones. Changed the dining table. Bought a new
rug." Veronica stated, tipping her head back.

"My mother gave me those vases. The dining table was fine. I liked the rug." Taehyung said,
clenching his fingers.

"I'm aware," Veronica said, smirking. "Which is why I changed it while you were gone."

"I don't like the curtains, I've asked to have them changed a hundred times-" Taehyung began, and
Veronica walked over to him. She reached closer, and then gripped his shirt, looking up.

"Well that's not going to happen, is it?" Veronica asked in a hushed voice. Taehyung looked away,
eyes darkening. "How was your trip with that boy?"

"Good. We fished." Taehyung mumbled, jaw tightening. She ran a thumb down his strong jaw,
tutting.

"Didn't call me even once," Veronica said, eyes flickering to his own. "I reckoned you'd have sex
with Anette again. So I slept with a boy two days ago. He was rather pretty, really. A law student.
Had these gorgeous plump lips." Veronica went on, wanting to rile him up.

"Darling, I've just come back from a holiday. Would you mind acting like a normal wife for one
fucking night?" Taehyung growled lowly, and Veronica tensed, seeing him turn away. "I mean,
look at Rosie. She's not a complete utter bitch," Taehyung snarked, and Veronica frowned.

"Excuse me?" Veronica said in a hushed tone, and Taehyung looked away. "Don't you dare speak
to me like that, Taehyung. And don't fucking compare me to Rosie. Not all women are meek and
docile. Don't expect me to be so."

"I don't expect you to be shit, Veronica. I just want some fucking normality for once in this
goddamn house," Taehyung said, raising his voice, hands in his pockets as he turned to look at
Veronica, who had her eyes darkened. "The moment I walk in you've changed everything, you're
talking about how you had sex with some boy, you-"

"Are you seriously affronted because I changed the rug?" Veronica asked, scoffing.

"I'm angry because you never ask, Veronica! You want everything to go your way and just expect
me to take it!" Taehyung shouted, and then saw Veronica tense up at how he raised his voice.

Taehyung gulped, shoulders tensing at how she looked at him. "I-" Taehyung began and then saw
Veronica looking down. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to-"

"What did I tell you about raising your voice at me?" Veronica asked, looking down, leaning
against the bar table.

"Veronica-" Taehyung said, and then Veronica looked up.

"Come here," Veronica said sharply, and Taehyung stood still. Veronica blinked her onyx eyes at
him and gestured with her fingers. "Come here, Taehyung."

Taehyung walked closer to her, seeing her place the glass of rum on the bar table. Taehyung
walked to her, and then took a deep breath. "I shouldn't have raised my voice. I know, I know- I'm
sorry. You- you just can't do such things and not expect me to get angered, Veronica," Taehyung
said, words soft.

Veronica was quiet. She reached her hand up, and then grabbed onto his blonde hair, giving it a
sharp tug. Taehyung looked away, breathing heavily. "You were a stupid, broken, bumbling little
idiot when I found you, Taehyung. I'm the reason you're the way you are. Don't you dare raise
your voice at me. Is that understood, angel?" Veronica said, tilting her head.

Taehyung kept quiet, refusing to look at her eyes. "Don't talk to me like this," Taehyung said lowly,
but his dominance had no effect on her. She ran her hand down and dug his nails into the back of
his neck.

"On your knees." She whispered, and Taehyung felt a wave of anger wreaking havoc inside of him
as he wordlessly got down on his knees, looking down.

Before Taehyung could grasp a hold of himself, his head was pushed under Veronica's dress, and
right to face with her crotch. She pulled her panties down enough for Taehyung's lips to meet her
supple skin. She pushed his head further in, and he kept his arms loosely by his sides. He began
eating her out, rubbing his tongue over her folds, hearing her hum in content.

She moaned and continued pushing his head back and forth, in control. He put his hands on her
thighs, but then felt her foot press harshly against his clothed cock and let his hands go.

"Good boy," She said in the middle, and Taehyung felt the anger of humiliation rooting deep inside
of him, but just continued pleasuring her, mouthing on her pink skin while she snickered at his
actions.

After minutes, she whimpered out and then bit her lip- cumming into his mouth. He swallowed it
down and looked up at her. She pulled his head away, breathing heavily.

"Sleep on the couch." She said, and then turned on heel and strutted back towards the bedroom, not
looking back.

Taehyung wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and leaned against the bar table, breathing
heavily. When he first met her, he'd always let her take control. Always let her have her way. When
they were younger, Taehyung wasn't the cocky, confident man he was today. He'd grown up
around loud, commanding people. So naturally, he followed someone who was naturally
commanding herself.

Veronica gave him the confidence he had today. Except she refuses to let him change when they're
alone. Wants him to give in to her control every time. And every time he does. Wordlessly.

Taehyung just wanted some control of his life, at the minute where everything felt like it was
spiraling. He got up from the floor and walked into his study, finding the black telephone and
ringing a number quickly.

He put the black metal against his ear and waited patiently, the rings going on for what seemed
like ages. Finally, he was met with a groggy, incoherent "Hello?"

"Jeongguk," Taehyung said, voice hushed. Taehyung leaned against the wall. "I'm sorry. I didn't
mean to wake you-"

"I-I'd only just gone to sleep. It's alright. What's wrong?" Jeongguk asked, the worry taking over
his voice.

"Nothing," Taehyung said, putting a hand against his forehead, squeezing his temple lightly to
make his headache go away. "I just wanted to hear your voice."

There was a bit of silence, and then a small giggle. "I'm here, Taehyungie," Jeongguk said, and
Taehyung could hear the smile through the phone. "Miss me already?"

"Yes. So much." Taehyung whispered, eyes closed. "I wish we were back in France already."

"I do too. It's so much easier to fall asleep with your arms around me." Jeongguk said, voice
hushed. Both weren't speaking too loud.

Taehyung sniffled, smiling. "Can I meet you tomorrow?"

"Yes. Please."

"Good. I'll see you then. I've got something to be hopeful for, at least." Taehyung said, and then
heard a small bashful squeak from the other side, and just smiled fondly at the image of Jeongguk
blushing, probably twirling his finger around his telephone wire.

"G-goodnight, Taehyungie."

"Goodnight, Jeonggukie," Taehyung whispered back, and then Jeongguk blew him a small kiss and
cut the phone. Taehyung put the phone down and took a deep breath. It's alright. Jeongguk was
here, so it's alright.

He didn't know Veronica was outside the study, leaning against the wall, frowning to herself after
having heard the conversation.

"You'd never believe this woman I slept with last week," Jimin said, standing behind the bar table,
cleaning some glasses. "She was older than me, I'm sure. A professor or something.
But fuck, Jeongguk. She sucked me dry and then rode me until I was shaking. Kicked me out the
minute she came." Jimin said, shuddering. "It was perfect."

"I rather not know the details to your lovemaking, Jimin," Jeongguk said, grimacing. "You're
so crude."

"You've probably never done a thing wrong in your lifetime, Jeongguk." Jimin laughed, and
Jeongguk hummed, looking at his glass of beer. "I'll still never understand how one can get
married so young,"

"I've known her all my life, it was inevitable," Jeongguk responded, and Jimin shrugged, pouring a
drink for another customer. Jeongguk sat on the bar stool, watching as Jimin laughed at the
customer and gave him the drink, and then walked back over to Jeongguk and rolled his eyes.

"These older men will never stop ridiculing us for never going to war. How is it our fault! The war
ended, and we were far too young when it began!" Jimin scoffed, offended. Jeongguk laughed and
then heard a voice.

"One scotch." A deep voice came, and Jeongguk snapped his head towards the voice, and his eyes
widened when he saw Taehyung. The blond man was in a suit, as usual, probably on his way back
from work. Jeongguk smiled at the man.

Jimin looked at him and then gasped. "Oh- wait- you're Kim Taehyung! That- that lawyer!"

"You know me?" Taehyung asked, looking bored.

"You came to my school to give a talk," Jimin said, astounded. Taehyung chuckled, and then
looked at Jeongguk, who was looking up at Taehyung with large eyes.

"My goodness, Jeongguk. You look like a goldfish." Jimin said, and Jeongguk looked at him with
a slight tint on his cheeks.

"Shut up, Jimin! Do your work," Jeongguk stammered, and Jimin snickered, taking out a glass and
finding the bottle of scotch. Taehyung looked at Jeongguk with a small smile.

The moment Jimin left, Jeongguk smiled at Taehyung. "What're you doing here?"

"I went to your work but they said you'd already left. One of the women working there said you
tend to go to this bar afterward, so here I am." Taehyung said softly and then saw Jeongguk blush a
little.

"You came looking for me?" Jeongguk asked, preening. Taehyung tapped his chin, giving him a
small wink.

"Come for a drive with me after this?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk nodded, holding back the
urge to leap forward and kiss the man. His fingers were twitching to wrap around Taehyung's, but
he just looked away.

"Here," Jimin said, placing the glass on the bar counter. Taehyung picked it up, giving him a small
smile. "Do you know each other?" Jimin asked.

Jeongguk bit his lip. "Yes, um- our wives are good friends. And we're neighbors." Jeongguk said,
and Jimin snickered, leaning over the counter and looking at Taehyung.
"Must be a pain having to hear Elvis every goddamn morning-"

"Jimin!" Jeongguk said again, hitting his arm. Jimin giggled and looked at Jeongguk. "I'm
only joking, Jeongguk. Your adoration for that man's music is questionable but endearing. Don't
fret over it." Jimin said, grinning. Jeongguk rolled his eyes, and Jimin leaned forward, ruffling up
his hair.

"I despise you," Jeongguk muttered, fixing his hair. Jimin laughed.

Jeongguk looked at Taehyung, who was looking at Jimin with a lifted eyebrow. Jeongguk
suddenly felt Taehyung's hand on his lower back. "You two are close, huh?" Taehyung asked,
voice dry.

Jeongguk looked at him cautiously, while Jimin snickered. "Yeah. Best mates. Known him since
he got here," Jimin explained, and Jeongguk felt Taehyung's hand go lower, humming.

Taehyung smiled. "How exciting," Taehyung muttered, and Jeongguk almost blushed. Jeongguk
wondered if he was jealous. Was this how Taehyung acted when he was jealous? Jeongguk looked
at him with curiosity and then saw Taehyung clear his throat.

"Jimin, is it? That's a lovely name." Taehyung said, words drawling. Jimin looked at him. "O-oh.
Thank y-"

"You're from London, are you?" Taehyung said, and Jeongguk was confused. Was he.. intervening
him? Jimin nodded. "Ah, no wonder. Your dialect is perfectly immaculate."

Jimin's cheeks tinted. "Oh! Um- thank you." Jimin murmured softly, looking away from Taehyung.
Taehyung smirked.

"A law student with a pretty face like yours will do wonders for the jury, I can already imagine,"
Taehyung said, and Jimin blushed harder.

Jeongguk looked at Taehyung with disbelief and then got up from the chair. "I need to go back
home, I've just realised. Could you drop me back, Taehyung?" Jeongguk asked, words sharp.

Taehyung looked from Jimin to Jeongguk, and then nodded. Jimin looked stuck, fumbling and
dropping some things, flustered. Taehyung finished his scotch quickly, and then followed
Jeongguk out of the pub. Once they were out, Jeongguk pushed Taehyung lightly.

"Woah- hey, relax darling-" Taehyung chuckled, and Jeongguk looked angry, a pout on his face
which was nothing but adorable to Taehyung. Jeongguk folded his arms, looking away. "What?
What did I do?"

Jeongguk didn't say anything. Taehyung sighed. "Fine. Stay silent, then. I won't give you the
present I bought," Taehyung tsked, and Jeongguk suddenly looked at him, eyes big.

"P-present?" Jeongguk asked, suddenly curious. Taehyung hummed. "Yes. It's in the car."

Jeongguk looked away, playing with his fingers. "Were you jealous back there?"

"Just thought your pal was getting a little too chummy, don't you think?" Taehyung snickered,
hands in his pockets. Jeongguk chewed on the inside of his cheek, looking away still. "Why, are
you upset at me for being jealous?"

"No!" Jeongguk snapped, looking at him. "I'm upset because- because you just- you just began
flirting with him!" Jeongguk said, frowning. Some men walked out of the pub, so Jeongguk got
quiet, and Taehyung looked at him apprehensively.

The car arrived soon. Taehyung opened the door for Jeongguk to get in, and then got into the back
of the car himself. Jeongguk sat on the edge as Jackson began driving. "Home, sir?"

"Yes." Taehyung said, and then looked at Jeongguk. "It's late. I rather go to my own home."
Jeongguk muttered. Taehyung scooted closer to him, and then placed a hand on his thigh.

"Darling... I'm sorry. Really! I can't help but charm people-"

"It makes me feel inferior, Taehyung." Jeongguk said in a small voice, and Taehyung's eyes
widened. Jeongguk stayed silent for a bit, looking outside, and then felt warm lips on his jaw.

"I'm sorry." Taehyung whispered. "I don't mean to." Taehyung continued, kissing up to his ear. "I
just got jealous because of how close he was to you and- well, I don't know. I guess I retracted to
my the only method I know of separating you two," Taehyung chuckled, and Jeongguk looked at
him.

Jeongguk touched his nose with Taehyung's, and they began kissing again. Jeongguk cupped his
jaw, and moved his head to the side to give Taehyung access into his mouth. Jeongguk brushed his
thumb down Taehyung's neck, and then paused.

Jeongguk pulled away. "What are these little bruises on your neck?" Jeongguk asked.

Taehyung touched the side of his neck, and then chuckled. "Oh- um. Veronica's got sharp nails.
She tends to- um- dig them into my neck at times." Taehyung muttered, and Jeongguk's eyes grew
big.

"Why?" Jeongguk asked softly. Taehyung tightened his hold on Jeongguk's waist and kissed his
collarbone. "It's nothing to fret over, darling." Taehyung reassured.

They reached Taehyung's house, and Taehyung walked out of the car and onto the other side,
opening the car door for Jeongguk to get out. Taehyung told Jackson to retrieve Veronica from the
college since she was working till later. Jeongguk followed Taehyung into their house.

The moment they entered and the doors closed, Jeongguk wrapped his arms around Taehyung, and
Taehyung wrapped his around Jeongguk's waist. Both hugged tightly for a few seconds, and
Jeongguk looked at Taehyung closely.

"I've got you a present." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk smiled giddily. "Really? What is it?"
Jeongguk asked, and then followed Taehyung, who'd taken his coat off, into the study room.
Jeongguk looked around the study, and then frowned.

"Oh you changed the rugs." Jeongguk said, and Taehyung hummed, opening the drawer of his
desk.

"Veronica did." Taehyung said. Jeongguk hummed. "I liked the old ones. They made it look more
homely," Jeongguk nodded, and Taehyung smiled to himself.

"Ah, Jeongguk. If only I met your pretty little self earlier," Taehyung sighed, taking out a box from
the drawer, and then hiding it behind his back. Jeongguk looked at Taehyung hopefully. Taehyung
walked over to Jeongguk, and then turned him so he was facing a mirror.

"You're so beautiful," Taehyung commented, kissing Jeongguk's bare neck. "My beautiful baby."
"I'm nothing compared to you." Jeongguk mumbled, looking at Taehyung's sun-kissed skin, his
dark eyes, his wide shoulders, how tall he looked, his firm chest, his strong jaw. Taehyung shook
his head, and then kissed Jeongguk's cheek.

"I can't be with you always." Taehyung whispered, and Jeongguk nodded, the sad reality of their
situation. "Sometimes, perhaps weeks will pass without as much as a greeting between us,"
Taehyung said, and Jeongguk looked at Taehyung in the mirror.

"I want to give you something to remember me by," Taehyung whispered, and Jeongguk tilted his
head slightly. Jeongguk suddenly saw Taehyung wrap a silver chain around Jeongguk's neck.

Jeongguk gasped softly, seeing the diamond jewel hanging from the center. "T-Taehyung-"
Jeongguk let out, and Taehyung locked the necklace together by the back of his neck. Taehyung
looked at the mirror and saw how the necklace hung atop his collarbone.

It was simple. Not too eye-catching. But it had a small diamond in the middle. "Taehyung you-you
shouldn't have. Is this diamond real?" Jeongguk asked wearily.

Taehyung wrapped his arms around his waist. "Yes." Taehyung whispered. Jeongguk blushed
brightly, the pretty pink hue adoring his cheeks. Jeongguk turned around in Taehyung's arms,
shaking his head.

"You c-can't. It's t-too much." Jeongguk squeaked, and Taehyung felt fondness creeping into his
heart at how bashful and timid Jeongguk looked. How adorable.

"Of course I can. And I did. It's perfect for you. Turn the diamond over," Taehyung said, and
Jeongguk turned it over in his fingertips, and then gasped when he saw a moonflower engraved on
the back of it. Though it was small, it was still there.

Jeongguk hid his head in the crevice of Taehyung's neck, and Taehyung chuckled. "T-thank you.
I'll never take it off, Taehyung. Not even once." Jeongguk whispered, and Taehyung kissed his
head.

"Good." Taehyung replied, kissing his temple. "You'll always know I'm there for you, my
darling."

Jeongguk hugged Taehyung tightly. His heart skipped a beat at how loving Taehyung was being. If
only they could be like this forever, with no interference.

Jeongguk went home after that. Walked right into his bedroom, sat himself down in front of his
mirror, and admired the necklace for it's worth in the bright light. The chain was silver, but the
jewel was a diamond, not too big, but beautiful. And then when he turned it over, the engraved
flower made Jeongguk's cheeks brighten. Jeongguk took the necklace off for a few seconds to
admire the jewel.

"Jeongguk," Rosie's voice came, whiney and soft as usual. Jeongguk tsked to himself and looked
out the door, seeing Rosie walking towards it. "This man came in today and his finger was
chopped off! Can you imagine!" Rosie said in disgust, and then walked into the bedroom and
paused.

Jeongguk looked up at her. Rosie's eyes widened. "Oh- i-is that- is that for me-" Rosie began,
fingertips reaching out to touch the necklace in Jeongguk's hands.

"No!" Jeongguk let out abruptly, standing up from the dresser and moving away from her. "No. It's-
it's mine." Jeongguk said.
"....Yours?" Rosie asked, frowning.

"Yes. Taehyung gave it to me. It's- it's a present." Jeongguk said, not wanting to say too much. He
put it over his neck, clipping the back of it around his neck.

"Taehyung gave it... is it a sort of... friendship necklace?" Rosie asked. Jeongguk nodded, fingertips
playing over the diamond. Rosie walked closer to him, and then furrowed her eyebrows. "Is
that diamond-"

"Y-yes. It's not anything to mull over, Rosie. It's the latest fashion." Jeongguk mumbled.

"Diamonds aren't latest fashion!" Rosie said, giggling out. "I think maybe that one was for
Veronica. Men usually wear gold chains-"

Jeongguk put his hand protectively over the jewel, and Rosie saw him looking down with a small
frown, embarrassed. Rosie tensed. "It's lovely. Sorry." Rosie said quickly, and Jeongguk looked up
at her.

After eating dinner and cleaning up, Jeongguk was just finishing some law work before going to
bed. Rosie was already in bed, reading a book. Jeongguk heard the phone ring. He picked it up
quickly and put it to his ear.

"Hello-"

"Come over. Now. Please."

"Taehyung? What's wrong? It-it's late at night. I don't think Rosie would-"

"Make something up," Taehyung said, words fast. "Veronica just left to catch a train back home.
Her mother's fallen ill."

"O-oh- oh no that's bad. I'm sorry-"

"It's alright. Please come over." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk gulped. "Okay. Okay, I-I'll be there
soon." Jeongguk said, and then cut the phone. Jeongguk walked to their bedroom. Rosie was
almost asleep.

"Rosie," Jeongguk said, walking up to her. Rosie heard her name being called and opened her eyes
wide, snapping out of drowsiness. Before she could speak, Jeongguk knelt in front of her bed and
placed a kiss on her cheek.

"O-oh-" Rosie squeaked out, and then looked at Jeongguk. "Rosie, um- Taehyung's got a big court
case tomorrow. Our firms are- are working together for it. So he wants my help. It'll give me credit
for law school, too. I must go now." Jeongguk said softly.

"So late at night?" Rosie asked, but Jeongguk kissed her forehead. "Yes. But- but there's a lot of
work left. I'm sorry. I'll see you tomorrow morning. Goodbye." Jeongguk said quickly, standing up
and rushing out.

Jeongguk grabbed his coat and ran out of his house, practically. Jeongguk rushed to Taehyung's
house and then knocked on the door. The door opened wide, and Jeongguk saw Taehyung, wearing
a black shirt which was untucked, and black trousers.

"Oh thank god-" Taehyung let out, and Jeongguk hugged him tightly. Taehyung hugged him back.
"What's wrong?" Jeongguk asked.
"Nothing. I want to hold you in my arms as I sleep again. I'm sorry for calling you late at night-"
Taehyung said, and Jeongguk looked at him and then paused.

Taehyung's eyes were slightly red, lips damp, bitten. He had bruises on the line of his jaw, looking
like those sharp nail bruises again. Jeongguk tensed. "T-Taehyung what happened-"

"Nothing, darling. Nothing at all. I told you, don't worry." Taehyung chuckled, hugging him
tightly. Jeongguk looked at the living room and saw Taehyung's suit jacket on the floor.

Taehyung kissed Jeongguk firmly. "I want to make love to you."

"Please do," Jeongguk whispered, and then Taehyung smiled and lifted him up, carrying him
towards his bedroom. Taehyung reached their bed and lowered Jeongguk onto their bed, looking at
him.

"Beautiful," Taehyung whispered, kissing his cheek. Jeongguk shivered and then locked their
foreheads together.

"Let me," Jeongguk said, turning Taehyung over and pinning him to the mattress. Taehyung looked
up at him, and Jeongguk straddled his waist, unbuttoning the man's shirt. When he did, he saw a
scratch mark on his chest. Jeongguk tilted his head.

"Do you have a cat I don't know about?" Jeongguk giggled, and then simmered down when he saw
Taehyung's blank expression. Taehyung looked up at Jeongguk.

"Jeongguk," Taehyung whispered, gripping his wrist. "Let me take control. Please. I want to make
you feel good, my darling. My love. Let me-" Taehyung said, looking as if he craved it. Craved the
control.

"Okay," Jeongguk said, and Taehyung sat up straight. Jeongguk ruffled his hair. "Are you okay,
Taehyungie? Is everything alright with Veronica?"

Taehyung smirked, looking at ease as always, the confidence showing. "Perfect. Why would it not
be? She got a call half an hour ago from her father, saying her mother's been admitted into the
hospital. So she left." Taehyung said.

Jeongguk wasn't sure if Taehyung was being honest about everything being 'perfect', but he let it
slide. He cupped Taehyung's jaw, and then bucked his hips into him, whimpering into his mouth.
"F-fuck me, please Taehyungie-"

"God, yeah," Taehyung said, flipping them over, and then smirking down at him. "My pretty
prince."

Jeongguk blushed, and then wrapped his legs around Taehyung's waist, giggling when Taehyung
went on about how adorable and cute Jeongguk was. His Jeonggukie. Jeongguk took it all and
giggled at all of Taehyung's soft wordings- but couldn't help but feel that Taehyung's smirk was a
little too strained.

**
 Chapter 16
Chapter Notes

im so sorry i haven't updated in forever... i didnt think the fic was doing too well on
here so i kinda forgot lol. i'll post this chapter. pls tell me if u want me to continue on
here bc the fic is 4 chapters ahead on wp!

**

It had been a week since Veronica had been absent. The weather had gotten warmer and the cold,
dull fog of London was turning into a blushing spring. The trees grew greener, its children arose
with vivid petals. Coats came off, and people began filling the streets again.

Jeongguk had a blue scarf tied around his eyes, wrists tugging at the other scarlet scarf restraining
them to the bed. Jeongguk was naked, writhing on Taehyung's bed, letting out whines and pellets of
whimpers.

"My beautiful angel," Jeongguk heard Taehyung's raspy voice say. Taehyung kissed down
Jeongguk's bare chest, one hand working in small circles on the inline of his waist while the other
thrust two fingers into the boy. Jeongguk bucked his hips, a disappointed mewl leaving his dainty
lips upon feeling no friction.

"T-Taehyung-" Jeongguk stammered, moving his head from one side to another, frantic. "Nngh-
kiss- k-kiss me-"

"Of course," Taehyung whispered, and pressed their lips together. Jeongguk felt Taehyung's fingers
push up further and reach his prostate. Jeongguk preened into the kiss, finally feeling Taehyung's
clothed body against his cock. Jeongguk thrust up, embarrassingly needy, wanting nothing more
than Taehyung to touch him all over.

Jeongguk had been at Taehyung's for every day in the past week. The moment classes ended,
Taehyung picked him up and took him back to his place. Jeongguk went back to his own at times,
for short periods. Taehyung always convinced him to stay the night. Jeongguk felt guilt stringing at
the bottom of his stomach for being so negligent to Rosie- but she'd been overly busy at the
hospital and slept the moment she came back from work. That, however, did little to reduce
Jeongguk's remorse.

For today, the sun had set hours past. The moon stood high in the sky, mighty in its approach to
seem so meek yet watchful. Taehyung had smirked at Jeongguk upon seeing him and quickly risen
his arousal to the thought of being tied up. Jeongguk had done so willingly, or rather, excitedly.

"Baby." Taehyung stated, more factual rather than calling. Taehyung began massaging Jeongguk's
prostate with his long fingers, and Jeongguk felt his head fulminate with pleasure as if a fire had
been lit in the pit of his stomach. Jeongguk's moans became louder, breath growing shorter. His
hands stayed up, tugging on its restraints though he was well aware he wanted them on. Seeing
only darkness made him appreciate Taehyung's touch, fingers, voice more.

"Ta-Taehyung." Jeongguk whimpered, biting down on his lip so hard he felt dizzy with blood.
"God- p-please-" Jeongguk let out, faint.

Taehyung shushed him softly. "You're beautiful like this," Taehyung said, kissing his chest, seeing
how his thighs clenched and legs lifted involuntarily at the little circles Taehyung made on his
prostate. "How fascinating it is to see you so compliant in my hands. You're ready to give me
everything," Taehyung said, in awe. "You've let me restrain your senses. You trust me to make
love to you, my love?"

"Yes." Jeongguk breathed out. "I enjoy it. I-Immensely. When- when you take control of-of me.
Touch me more, please. I crave it." Jeongguk said, lips damp. Taehyung pressed another kiss to his
open lips.

Taehyung took his fingers out. He held both sides of his thighs and lifted them up, pushing his
cock in rather swiftly. Jeongguk let out cries, his flush reminding Taehyung of the spring. His pale
moonlike body squirmed against the sheets as Taehyung fucked him thoroughly.

"I can't imagine how utterly devastating life would've been for you if you hadn't had felt this,"
Taehyung whispered, smirking above him, looking at his helpless boy who gave in to Taehyung's
tough, just whimpering and desperately trying to rub his cock against Taehyung.

Taehyung saw tears slip past the scarf tied around his head, and kissed them away. He knew he
couldn't litter Jeongguk's neck with hickies, even though he wanted to badly. Their wives simply
got in the way at times. Taehyung continued fucking Jeongguk, whispering filth into his ear.

Jeongguk came soon, perhaps too. His humiliation was unrepentant, the flush on his cheeks
showing the high he felt. Taehyung came soon from that too, enjoying how Jeongguk cried his
name in his frail, pretty voice.

Taehyung pulled the condom out and got off the bed to throw it into the bin. He turned back
around and took mirth in the sight of Jeongguk naked, back arching, his waist looking smaller than
ever in this ankle, thighs squeezing together, knees facing the ceiling. His nimble fingers trembled,
and the tears continued to cascade down his cheeks. He moved his head around as if wondering
where Taehyung was.

"Taehyung?" Jeongguk asked, fearful of his absence. Taehyung walked closer to the bed.

"Could I photograph this? I'd like to keep it with myself at all times. For the future, perhaps."
Taehyung said.

Jeongguk nodded. "Y-yes." Jeongguk said with no hesitation. Taehyung grabbed his black camera
with its silver edges and lit a cigarette seamlessly. He stood close to the bed, letting out smoke
from his mouth while clicking a photograph of his beauty.

Taehyung placed the camera onto the side and then climbed onto the bed to straddle Jeongguk's
narrow hips and undo the scarves around his wrist and eyes. Once they were off, Jeongguk brought
his hands to his chest and blinked his wet eyes.

"Beautiful," Taehyung muttered, leaning down and kissing his lips, holding his cigarette loosely in
one hand. Jeongguk's tongue fluttered in Taehyung's mouth, and the older pulled away, laying
down beside him.
"I shouldn't stay tonight," Jeongguk whispered as Taehyung threw his arm over Jeongguk's waist,
killing the remains of his cigarette into the ashtray beside the bed. Taehyung hummed.

"Rubbish. You should stay the night, and you will." Taehyung said, kissing the back of his neck.
Jeongguk moved in his arms, and then turned around to face him. Taehyung felt a kiss to his
cheek.

"Taehyung," Jeongguk said softly. "I've exchanged less than 5 words to Rosie in more than a week.
It's not fair to her." Jeongguk said, and Taehyung opened his eyes.

"Didn't you say she was busy with work?" Taehyung said, and then put his hand on Jeongguk's
bare hip. "Don't worry, lamb. It's just one more night-"

"That's what you've been saying every night," Jeongguk said, and then sat up, taking a sharp
breath. "We can't just stop our lives and spend every moment together, as much as I'd enjoy it. We
can't pretend we're in France." Jeongguk said, looking at him.

Taehyung sat up and watched as Jeongguk got off the bed, the little purple bruises Taehyung's lips
had made in Jeongguk's inner thighs gleaming perfectly. Jeongguk picked his pants and slipped
them past his legs. Taehyung snickered.

"After everything that happened tonight, don't you think you deserve a little bit of my affection?
Darling, I'm only trying to take care of you. I assumed you'd be fazed after our sex-"

"I'm fine, Taehyung. Honestly." Jeongguk said, and then grabbed the trousers which lay on the
bed. Jeongguk put them on quickly and then saw Taehyung get up from the bed, only wearing
trousers and no shirt, new unlit cigarette in his hand.

Taehyung smirked. "You got me to fuck you and then decided to leave, is it?" Taehyung asked,
voice dripping, eyes glinting with a hint of annoyance.

Jeongguk frowned, eyes growing big. "N-no. Why would you say so? You're the one who keeps
insisting on us doing such things-"

"Don't act like you don't want it, lamb. Are you going to play innocent, again? It really doesn't suit
you anymore," Taehyung whispered, clutching Jeongguk's wrist.

Jeongguk pulled his arm back, looking uncertain. "Are you angered with me? For- for what? For
not avoiding my responsibilities and succumbing into this- this affair?" Jeongguk asked, confused.
Taehyung looked at him, and then chuckled, dry.

"Are you joking?" Taehyung asked lowly. "Affair? Is that what you think of me?"

"Is that not what we are?" Jeongguk asked back.

"All I'm asking is for you to stay the night, and you're making it seem as if I'm some sort of
desperate maiden who won't let you go," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk scoffed, in disbelief.

"You're acting like it, Taehyung! Every night I wasn't here you called me and asked me to come
over! You-you haven't even called your wife, and she's been gone a whole week to visit her sick
mother!"

"As if you're such a good husband. Do you even know what Rosie enjoys? Do you ask how her
work is?" Taehyung snapped, fingers playing with the cigarette.
"Then let me be a good husband! I admit I don't treat Rosie all that well. But I was forced into the
marriage, Taehyung. Rosie will never admit to what she did. She convinced my mother that I loved
her, and they only told me I was getting married on the morning of my wedding day. I haven't let
that anger go, but you-you chose to marry Veronica. At least act like it." Jeongguk said, turning to
walk away.

"You want me to act like it?" Taehyung asked, walking closer to him. Jeongguk began walking
down the stairs, and Taehyung followed. "Is that what you want, Jeongguk? Because that would
make things highly difficult between you and me, love." Taehyung said roughly, seeing Jeongguk
pause by the door, looking at his shoes.

"You know that's not what I mean, Tae-"

"Then don't speak of it." Taehyung growled, grabbing him by his waist, pulling him closer in.
"Don't pretend like you're not dependant on my affection," Taehyung whispered against his cheek
and then pressed their lips together.

Jeongguk let out a sound of abrupt confusion through the kiss, feeling Taehyung trying to press his
tongue into the younger's mouth. Jeongguk pulled away quickly, letting out an entangled breath,
looking at Taehyung with discomposure. Taehyung began kissing his neck, wrapping his arms
around his waist.

"W-what are you-" Jeongguk stammered while Taehyung's hands traveled lower to his ass. "Tae-
Taehyung-" Jeongguk said, feeling Taehyung holding him oh so tightly. "Taehyung!" Jeongguk
said sharply, pushing Taehyung off him.

"What's wrong with y-you?" Jeongguk said, frowning. Taehyung looked shocked and confused by
himself as well. "I can't spend every fucking night with you, Taehyung!"

Taehyung gulped, and Jeongguk put his shoes on quickly, grabbing his coat. Taehyung looked
desperate, afraid, eyes wide in a forlorn sense of fear. "D-don't go, please." Taehyung said, soft.

"I'm not staying here with you, not now." Jeongguk said. Jeongguk reached for the door and
Taehyung grabbed his arm.

"I'm sorry- I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be so aggressive. I r-really am sorry, just stay one night.
One last night, I swear- I promise you can leave a-after-" Taehyung stammered, looking as if trying
his hardest to keep his composure. "Please, just-"

"Taehyung." Jeongguk said softly, eyes big in worry. "Get some sleep, please. Call Veronica,
maybe. I'm sorry. I'll see you later." Jeongguk said, and then opened his door and walked out,
closing it quickly.

Taehyung looked at the door with wide eyes, the realization of his poignantly pathetic words
hitting him. How- how desperate and adhesive he sounded. Exactly what he resented. And here he
thought Jeongguk was the one who was clingy.

Taehyung left the doorway, walking back to his bedroom, hands trembling ever so lightly.
Taehyung went for the telephone hung to the wall and lifted it to his ear, ringing a number. The
tone rang a few times, and then Taehyung heard a soft sigh.

"You've finally decided to call me?" Veronica's voice came.

"I just wanted to ask if your mother's gotten any better." Taehyung said, hearing coughing behind
Veronica.
There was a small silence. "She hasn't. Doctors say it's terminal. I might have to stay longer than I
intended to."

"That's alright." Taehyung said. "I can come too, if you'd like. I'm sure it can be fearful, seeing
your own mother so-"

"I don't need your help, Taehyung. Don't pity me." Veronica said, and Taehyung paused for a split
second and then huffed out a cold snicker. "Right. Of course. Goodbye." Taehyung muttered, not
letting her respond and cutting the phone call.

Taehyung walked to his bed, laying down, placing the unused cigarette on the table. He felt his
heart pacing fast, stomach contorting within itself, his head spinning. Taehyung lay down on his
bed, gripping a cushion quickly, laying down. Taehyung took deep breaths, closing his eyes. He
thought of Jeongguk.

All he could think of was how upset Jeongguk looked before he left. Taehyung closed his eyes
tighter, wishing he was holding Jeongguk in his arms.

The next morning, Jeongguk made breakfast and milk tea for Rosie. He'd returned the night before,
but she hadn't been awake. He woke up before her and made her breakfast. She woke up at 8 in the
morning, already dressed for work, hurrying to the kitchen as she did every day. Upon seeing
Jeongguk, she paused. "Oh, you're here today."

Jeongguk chuckled. "Um, yes. The work with Taehyung's firm finished." Jeongguk said, and then
smiled. "I've made you breakfast."

"O-oh. That's rather sweet of you, thank you." Rosie said softly, and Jeongguk picked up a tray and
carried it to the dining table, placing it down. He was about to pour the tea into a small cup, but she
rushed up to him.

"You needn't do all that. I'll do it. You've done more than enough, please! Thank you." Rosie said,
kissing his cheek. Jeongguk tsked.

"Don't worry, Rosie. I've just-" Jeongguk began, but Rosie took the pot of tea from his hands.
"Please! Don't do all of this for me, it's embarrassing." Rosie stammered in honesty, and Jeongguk
let the pot go from his hands, looking uncertain.

"You're- you're a man, you really mustn't do such housework. I could have done it." Rosie said, and
Jeongguk frowned.

"I'm simply cooking for my wife. You could be more appreciative of the fact," Jeongguk muttered,
and Rosie looked at him.

"Why? Do- do I not cook well? Oh goodness, is- is my cooking not good? I knew being a nurse
was a bad idea. I haven't made a good meal for a while, have I?" Rosie went on, scared. Jeongguk
shook his head.

"No no, I-I meant- I only did it to repay you-"

"Repay me? I haven't done anything. If anything, I should repay you." Rosie said, stumped.

"You work now too, Rosie. You deserve a meal cooked from someone from time to time,"
Jeongguk said lightly, giving her a small smile. Rosie still looked a little doubtful.

"My father never cooked for my mother." Rosie said in a tethered tone.

"Your- your father and I are different people." Jeongguk said, as if obvious. Rosie nodded, sitting
down. Jeongguk let out a breath and then turned to walk away towards the couches.

Jeongguk saw a photograph on the coffee table and lifted it up. "My sister sent it. It's from her new
home. Isn't it splendid? She says living in Bristol's quite nice, actually." Rosie chirped.

Rosie had 3 sisters. Two older, one younger. They were all married before she was. Jeongguk
looked at the picture. It was two of Rosie's older sisters standing in front of a fireplace with their
husbands. Jeongguk hummed.

Their husbands were built, buff men. One with slicked black hair and a mustache, and the other
with clean blonde hair. They were the perfect domestic family. With tall picket fences and wives
that didn't work. One of the sisters was pregnant. One of the husbands was a police officer, and the
other a mechanic. Both quite successful in those fields. They were manly, older, strong, both had
gone to war when they were younger.

Jeongguk looked at Rosie. "Do you wish you were like your sisters at times?"

"Quite often," Rosie said softly, and Jeongguk hummed, looking away.

He kept the photograph down and then unknowingly put his fingers to his dry lips. "Do you have
any chapstick? My lips are quite dry." Jeongguk said. Rosie stilled, looking at him. Jeongguk
turned to look at her and then saw her giving him an odd look.

"Um. Yes- there's one in my purse." Rosie mumbled. Jeongguk reached for her purse which was on
the sofa, rummaged through it, and then found the lip balm which was shaped like any other
lipstick. Jeongguk opened the cap of it and found the small mirror stuck to the wall beside the
kitchen.

Jeongguk applied the lip balm slowly, watching how he looked while applying it to his bottom lip,
and then smoothly coating his top lip with it. He stopped and then pressed his lips together for a
second and looked at himself, and then noticed the slight pink tint to the balm.

Jeongguk applied another layer, tilting his head and seeing the pretty glossy pink color, and how it
contrasted to his pale skin. Jeongguk applied another coat, the tint only growing more vivid,
making his lips look pinker. Jeongguk was ready to apply another, when;

"I don't think you have to do it so many times. Once is enough." Rosie said from the dinner table.
Jeongguk brought the tube away and hummed, closing it with the cap and then placing it into
Rosie's purse.

Jeongguk brushed his hair to the side, still looking at the mirror. He played with the diamond on
his necklace and thought of Taehyung, and how sad he'd looked when Jeongguk left. His eyes,
which are usually so dark and intimidating, looked puppy-like. Jeongguk let out a small sigh to
himself, and then stopped fondling the gem between his fingers.

"Don't you think silver looks- oh?" Jeongguk stopped, seeing Rosie up and grabbing her purse,
heading for the door. "You're leaving so quick? I thought work didn't begin by 9." Jeongguk
asked.

"I've decided to go early today." Rosie grumbled. Jeongguk looked confused. She never got upset
like this.

"Rosie is everything alright?" Jeongguk asked, and Rosie looked at her from the door.

"Can't you be like other men?" Rosie blurted out in annoyance, eyebrows furrowed. Jeongguk
stilled, taken aback by this sudden statement.

Jeongguk stood by the sofa, and Rosie gulped. "I've just- I-I've just spoken so brashly to you and
you don't even raise your voice. I know you've always been rather quiet, but don't- don't you wish
to be manly sometimes?"

Jeongguk felt affronted, a little offended, by these words. He'd never been manly. He knew this.
He knew this because the boys at his school always hurt him and called him names because of it.
He knew this because he always got called maidenly or cowardly by his male counterparts.
Of course he wishes he could be manly. All the time.

Jeongguk looked at her. He looked hurt. Rosie let out a sharp breath. "I-I'm sorry." Rosie
whispered, looking down. She closed her eyes. "I'm r-really sorry. I didn't mean to say all of that. I
just- d-didn't get proper sleep last night."

Jeongguk nodded, hand unconsciously going up to fondle with the small diamond hung to his neck.
Rosie looked at him. Jeongguk was looking away. "A-alright. You might as well go to work early,
it might rain soon." Jeongguk said, words soft.

Rosie nodded and turned around to walk out. Jeongguk sat down on the sofa, tears threatening to
spill from his brown eyes. Jeongguk didn't think Rosie, who knew him during school and saw him
getting picked on by other older boys almost every week, still had all of that to say. Her
perspective was valid, Jeongguk understood that. But it still hurt.

**
 Chapter 17
Chapter Notes

ohmy gosh i didnt think i'd get this much support! ofc i'll continue the fic on here
thank u sm!!!

**

Jeongguk stared at himself in the mirror, eyes resembling a crystal, filled with tears. They weren't
those of sadness, but rather, commemoration. Of sleepless nights and wallowing women.

His white shirt fell off his shoulder, his chin tilted up at his reflection, his skin pale, gleaming. His
diamond sitting on the dip of his collarbone, sparkling. The bejeweled stone brought him much
satisfaction, one that measly everyday occurrences could not fulfill.

Jeongguk was sat on the small white seat in front of Rosie's dresser she'd brought from home. The
white woodwork on the top reminded him of her delicate beauty, one that was so effortless. Her
lips always a pretty shade of pink made rosier with a tint or balm. Her cheeks flushed, contrasting
beautifully to her blonde hair which always sat in curls on her shoulders. Her body small, always
looking smaller in her flowy dresses. The light pink on her fingertips making her tinier hands look
pretty, her entire physique pretty, everything about her- pretty, pretty, pretty.

Jeongguk was never in love with her. He'd always envied her.

Jeongguk wishes he could be her.

Rosie could've been with Taehyung. She would've satisfied his every desire. They would've kissed,
and Taehyung would've held her petite body in his arms, and their blonde striking appearances
would've melded together like water and sand. Jeongguk and Taehyung weren't like water and sand.
They were water and fire.

Every approach to Taehyung would be distinguished, sparked into a bigger flame. They could
never be together outside. Jeongguk could never be what Taehyung truly longed for, and that was
the truth he hid with vigor. If Jeongguk was a woman, everything would be so much simpler.

Months ago, a few days after their marriage, Jeongguk was sure he was in love with Rosie. He'd
always found her beautiful, always wanted to be closer to her, wanted to see how she moved, how
she talked. He was never in love. He only had a yearning. A yearning to be like her.

Not a woman. But, pretty.

"Jeongguk?" Rosie's voice came. She'd come back from work. She stood by the door. Jeongguk
turned his head towards her, looking delectable in the moonlight, like a flower. "Are you alright?"

Jeongguk nodded. He gave her a small smile. "I-I am." Jeongguk said, voice hushed. "How- um-
how was work?"

"You've been crying?" Rosie asked, soft. She sounded caring, but in reality, she was uneasy. She
always was, when seeing Jeongguk be so fragile, so... maidenly.

"No. No, I-" Jeongguk began, and then got up from the small seat, lifting the shoulder of his
his shirt up. "I'm alright."

"This shirt seems too big for you," Rosie pointed out, confused. Jeongguk felt the fine fabric the
shirt was made of, and bit his lip. "I-It's Taehyung's. I must've accidentally taken it in France."
Jeongguk said, timid.

"Alright. I'll go make dinner." Rosie said, turning around to walk out. Jeongguk breathed out
a sigh, and then walked to the study room to find the only telephone in their house. He was about
to ring Taehyung's number, but hesitated.

Didn't know if calling the man would be the best option at the moment. They'd last been unsteady,
uneven, left at a point Jeongguk didn't want to be at. With everything back at home, back at work,
back at every place else, fighting with Taehyung felt horrible. Taehyung was his only source of
happiness at the moment, as unhealthy as it may seem.

Jeongguk didn't call him. Instead, he sat down on his chair and burrowed himself in another one of
his extensive law books. At times he wondered if law was something he actually wanted to do.
Criminal law too. He wasn't quite sure. He knew his aunt wanted to become a lawyer, but never
could become one because women of her age weren't allowed to have such jobs. He'd always
looked up to her, so following her footsteps and fulfilling her dreams felt right.

At law school, the next day, Jeongguk very seriously considered if becoming a lawyer was the best
of ideas.

"I'll tell you what I saw," A brown haired boy with disdaining overconfidence spoke to Jimin and
Jeongguk, cigarette in his mouth. Named Charles, or Robert, Or William- or another name
Jeongguk wouldn't remember. "A man, dressed as a woman."

Jimin tsked. "Homosexuality, innit? I spoke to my friend about this, he's learning medicine. They
call it a sociopathic personality disturbance." Jimin said. "Mental disease, basically. They say it can
be cured, however."

Jeongguk felt his heart drop, looking away. "Cured? I reckon you just beat these so called mentals
to get their brain sorted," The brown haired boy laughed.

"Bit over the line there, Charles," Jimin said, and Jeongguk bit the inside of his
cheek. Charles. That's what his name was.

Mental disease, Jeongguk thought. Maybe he and Taehyung are a bit manic.

"Men are getting more subordinate as the days go by," Charles gruffed, smoking the end bits of the
cigarette, his face pale and full of freckles. "I mean, you have to be quite the sissy to make your
wife work, don't ya?" Charles said, and Jeongguk stilled.

He was talking about Jeongguk, obviously. Jimin pursed his lips. "Wives want to work these days,
Charles."
"The day mine works, I'd know I've failed as a man. Eh, Jeongguk?" Charles smirked, mocking
him. Jeongguk looked at him.

"Rosie wants to be a nurse," Jeongguk said firmly, but faltered on the inside. She didn't. He knew
she didn't.

"Only to earn money because her husbands a wanker," Charles snickered.

"She won't have to work when I become a lawyer." Jeongguk stated. Jimin looked at him, as if
questioning the boy himself. "Un-unless she wants to. I won't tell her how to live-"

"Won't you? Women must be so unsatisfied with the likes of you, Jeongguk. Poor Rosie. What's
the point of getting married if she's got to work anyway?" Charles said.

"Men can't carry all the weight of the household on themselves, Charles. My mum worked all her
life, and she's the most elegant woman I know." Jimin muttered.

"We fought in wars, we killed those nazis, we protected our land. And you think we can't carry the
weight of our households? My future wife's going to be pregnant and take care of all the cookin'
and cleanin', isn't she? Why, I don't want to burden her further with work." Charles scoffed.

"First of all, you didn't fight one bit, Charles. You were 10 when the war happened. Killed
the nazis, as if." Jimin said, and Charlie snickered.

Jeongguk leaned against the wall, a fear building in his heart. He looked ahead into the granite
ground before him. He was an incompetent husband. Not only loyally, but in a general, societal
sense. Unlike someone like Veronica, Rosie didn't want to work. Jeongguk's weakness was forcing
her to do so. She had all the right to be upset with him if she wanted to be.

"Mind your own business, Charles. You're just upset Emily didn't want to marry you." Jeongguk
sniped, and Charles frowned, turning a bit red. Jimin spluttered out a laugh. Jeongguk turned
around, holding his book bag, and walked away from behind the building, where they came to
smoke.

Jeongguk turned the building, and froze when he saw Taehyung there. It's like he was everywhere,
a metaphysical entity of kinds that seemingly sensed whenever Jeongguk was upset and showed
up. He was leaning against the wall, smoking. He was dressed in a grey suit.

"Taehyung?" Jeongguk said breathily. Taehyung turned his head, and continued upholding the
slack, careless expression on his face upon spotting the boy.

"I rung your home many times, Jeongguk." Taehyung mumbled, lax. Jeongguk tensed.

"I-I know, I-" Jeongguk began, but didn't know how to respond. He never picked the telephone up,
knowing it must be Taehyung. Taehyung stood properly, and began walking towards him, one
hand in his pocket. He looked tall, taller than usual.

"Was it all a lie? Back in France? You telling me you wanted me, yearned for me. Was it all some
sort of ploy to get me to stay longer, Jeongguk?" Taehyung asked, closer to him.

"N-no." Jeongguk said, and tried to be firm. "No, Taehyung. Of course not. I wouldn't do such a
thing. I care about you, immensely. But I couldn't keep the guilt I had for Rosie locked away so
carelessly. I'm not as proud as you are, Taehyung. You and Veronica, you- you know of each
other's tendancies, don't you?"
Taehyung hummed, smoking out. "Do you mean how she knows that I used to fuck other women
behind her back? Yes, quite clearly. Just how I know of how many men she's let inside of
her through out the course of our marriage." Taehyung said.

Jeongguk flinched at how casual his tone was while discussing a matter so harrowing. "Why is
that?"

Taehyung smirked. "Why, darling? Do you want me to spill all my little secrets to you, is that it?
With nothing in return?" Taehyung asked, tilting his head. "I feared so. Quite brattish, are you?
Have you been fooling me this whole time, Jeonggukie? Led me to believe you're a cherub when
you're actually full of mischief?"

Jeongguk stilled. Taehyung brought one hand forward, fingers tipping his chin up so he'd look him
eye to eye. Jeongguk shook his head, cheeks pink. "No, Taehyung. I'm not fooling you. I promise.
Don't doubt me like this." Jeongguk said.

Taehyung tsked. "I can't help it, little angel. I've been raised to question everyone and everything.
That's what lawyers do, don't they?"

"Don't be a lawyer with me." Jeongguk said softly, and Taehyung brushed his thumb along his jaw.
Taehyung smiled for a second, and then looked at his sleek black car on the side.

"Come with me." Taehyung said. Jeongguk hesitated for a second, and Taehyung sighed. "Don't
accuse me of being desparate again, if you can. I only want to be with my moonflower. Haven't
I earned the pleasure?"

Jeongguk saw him leaning against the car, and walked up to him. He wanted nothing more than to
kiss the older man at the moment. So Jeongguk nodded. "Alright. But drop me home after."

"Unless I convince you to come to mine after," Taehyung said. Jeongguk hummed. "Don't make
me laugh. Can't just pick me up off the streets like this and expect me to get in bed with you."

Taehyung smirked, head tilting back. "Oh. Can't I? My, aren't you quite the prima donna?"

Jeongguk blushed. "Shut it, mister. Open the car door for me." Jeongguk said.

"As you say, princess." Taehyung sighed airily, opening the car door for him. Jeongguk got into
the back seat. Taehyung closed the door and went to the other side of the car. When he got in, he
saw Jeongguk talking.

"Hello Jackson. How's Maria?" Jeongguk asked. Taehyung snickered, undoing his suit jacket
button to sit down comfortably.

"Who on earth is Maria?"

"Jackson's wife. Don't be rude." Jeongguk said, and then looked at Jackson, who smiled at him
kindly through the rear-view mirror.

"She's alright. Been a bit sick lately because of the pregnancy." Jackson admitted, and Jeongguk
frowned a little.

"You're having a child? Why, congratulations! Why didn't I know your wife was pregnant?"
Taehyung asked, frowning. Jackson gulped, looking ahead. "Sir, you didn't even know I had a
wife."
Jeongguk giggled. "Ah, please forgive his ignorance, Jackson. Taehyung thinks he's the perfect
man." Jeongguk said, looking at Taehyung.

"Thinks? I am the perfect man. And since when did you get so friendly with-" Taehyung pointed
his thumb at the driver's seat. Jackson pursed his lips.

"I saw that, sir."

"Didn't ask, Jackson. Drive to the lake." Taehyung instructed, and Jackson nodded and began
driving.

"I've been in this car at least twenty times now, Taehyung. It's only polite to make conversation.
Not everyone's a rich boy." Jeongguk tutted. Taehyung scoffed. "Rich man." Taehyung corrected,
and Jeongguk rolled his eyes with a small laugh.

Taehyung then placed his hand on Jeongguk's thigh. He moved so he was sat closer to him, and
then leaned forward to press their lips together. Jeongguk kept his eyes open, not kissing him back.
Taehyung pulled away, grunting in annoyance.

"You need to talk to me about what happened that day," Jeongguk said in a whisper.

Taehyung looked away. Jeongguk put his hand on Taehyung's, which was splayed on his thigh. "I
can help, Taehyungie. Try with me. Please." Jeongguk said.

"There aren't any problems, if you think that's the issue." Taehyung said, leaning back to his chair.
Jeongguk leaned against his shoulder, looking up at him.

"You can't fool anyone with that." Jeongguk said, poking his chest. "Everyone has problems they
deal with, Taehyung. If you didn't have any, I'd be frightened."

"Men... aren't supposed to have problems," Taehyung said.

"Of course they are. We're humans too. I'm the last person who expects you to be rigid and have
these walls up at a constant." Jeongguk said, and Taehyung sighed, looking at him.

"Kiss me." Taehyung said. Jeongguk nodded, reaching up to press their lips together. Taehyung put
one hand on the back of his head, making the kiss firmer, ensuring Jeongguk understood how
much he needed this. Jeongguk did. He gripped his hair, moving their lips together fluently.

Taehyung effortlessly pulled Jeongguk on his lap, and Jeongguk threw his arms over his shoulders,
jumping a little when the car went over a speedbump. Jeongguk pulled away, and Taehyung kissed
his neck. In the midst of it all, Jackson let out a slight sigh, glancing at them through the mirror.

"Heard that, Jackson," Taehyung muttered.

"I'm driving, sir." Jackson said hastily.

Jeongguk climbed off Taehyung's lap. "Let's keep it for our homes," Jeongguk said.

"I don't want to." Taehyung mumbled, lips puckered in upset. Jeongguk looked at him worriedly.
"Well, we have to. We have no choice."

Taehyung scoffed. "See what you did, Jackson. I'm cutting your salary." Jeongguk's eyes widened
at his words and he whacked his thigh, glaring at him.

"I'll drive off a cliff." Jackson replied. Taehyung tsked. "Don't be funny with me, Jackson."
Taehyung said, and Jeongguk shook his head.

"Relax, will you? He knows I'm bluffing. Anyway, we're here. Weather's still nice. Get out the
car." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk nodded, opening the car door and getting out. Taehyung
smacked his ass while Jeongguk went out.

Taehyung walked out as well. Jeongguk looked around and noticed no one else was here. In fact,
they were quite far off from any sort of civilization. No man nor woman in sight. Only stretches of
lake, and an oak bench under a big tree.

"Perfect." Taehyung said, and then led Jeongguk towards the benches. Jeongguk trotted with him,
and then sat down on the bench when they reached. Jeongguk smiled at the lake.

"How pretty." Jeongguk commented. Taehyung tucked a strand of Jeongguk's hair behind his ear.
"Not nearly as much as you."

"Oh," Jeongguk piped, and then looked at the man. His golden hair reminded Jeongguk of a mane,
and Taehyung himself a lion. Proud, powerful, majestic. But maybe Jeongguk had been wrong of
his comparisons.

"Talk to me, please," Jeongguk said. Taehyung looked at the lake, and at the swindling green
leaves falling from the trees, the rushing waters of the lake that used to be a dead gray, now a
pleasant blue. Taehyung's breath was stuck.

"Two years ago, I'd found out Veronica had been sleeping with many men behind my back."
Taehyung let out, tugging on his wedding ring.

Jeongguk kept silent. "I was furious at the time. So, in turn, I'd gone ahead and... well, done the
same. Slept with many women. It almost became some sort of psychopathic competition. Who
could hurt the other the most. She tried to fuck my brothers, too. It was mindless, unhealthy."

Taehyung looked at his ring finger. "One day, we calmed down. We realised what we were doing.
How much we were hurting each other. But we also knew that we couldn't satisfy one another to
the extreme. So, Veronica suggested we come up with some sort of peculiar relationship. One
where we can sleep with other people, but still be together and love one another."

"Makes no sense," Jeongguk said, soft, not wanting to come across as rude. Taehyung snickered. "I
know. It didn't to me either. But I couldn't say no to her."

"Why not?" Jeongguk asked.

"She's known me the longest. Been there for me since I was 18. I mean, it's her. I- I love her."
Taehyung said, whispering the last part. Jeongguk's stomach dropped, and he felt his chest tighten.

I love her. Jeongguk just nodded.

"But- I don't know. Veronica's grown different. She used to be bold, audacious. Yet, she was
playful. Her tenacity was endearing. Her brassy, cocky self was captivating to me. She wasn't
perfect. She never... wanted to be perfect. But never alike to society. She- she used to tell me that I
was the perfect man. Because I found her domineering attitude adorable at the time. Never saw her
as subordinate."

Jeongguk stilled. Something inside him crawled, darkness lurking around the pits of his stomach.
Taehyung's eyes were glittering, fond. Remembering old times. Jeongguk felt bile in the back of
his throat. Maybe this wasn't a good idea.
"But as the years went on, her playful, adorable, careless side went away. She became colder,
meaner, distant. She'd get angry every time I'd show any sort of... manliness to her. When I would
talk back to her, or raise my voice, or get upset at her ways- she'd break me down. Call me- call me
names, push me around. As if I was below her, in a way." Taehyung muttered, and Jeongguk could
tell. Could tell he was vulnerable, that he'd never uttered these words, that this was his deepest
truth, and Jeongguk was the one he was letting know of it.

"You don't like being treated like that, I presume?" Jeongguk asked. Taehyung snickered. "Would
anyone?"

"That's how most women are treated," Jeongguk said, looking down. Taehyung tensed.

"I know. And it's horribly, horribly disdainful. How these so-called men think they hold so much
power over these women. They don't. But- but Veronica acts as if- as if she's like one of those
men." Taehyung said, and then sounded breathless. "And I don't like that. I'm- I'm strong as well.
Everyone respects me everywhere I go, I ensure they do, I d-don't let any vulnerability out, but-but
why can't she...? Why does she treat me like-"

"Taehyung," Jeongguk let out, worried. Taehyung looked at him, eyes big, hands trembling lightly.
"Don't- don't spiral. Breathe. Breathe for me," Jeongguk whispered. Taehyung nodded, taking deep
breaths.

"You're okay. She's not here." Jeongguk said.

"I'm not scared of her. If anything, when we fight, she looks as if she's the scared one. Scared of... I
don't know what. I don't know what's gotten into her. If we could just go back to being 18,"
Taehyung said, looking away.

"Would you? If- if you had a choice? Be with an 18-year-old Veronica?" Jeongguk asked, almost a
little afraid.

Taehyung looked at him. Jeongguk awaited the long silence. Yet, no answer. Taehyung looked
apprehensive. Jeongguk nodded. He knew what his answer was.

Yes. Taehyung would give anything to be with Veronica, how she was. Jeongguk could never be
her. Jeongguk put their fingers together and then laid his head on Taehyung's shoulder.

"It's okay," Jeongguk said. He ignored how his heart felt as if it was chipped, cracked from the
base. He felt despondent with Taehyung's response. But Jeongguk couldn't change his mind.

Taehyung kisses his head. "The reason I got so scared when you leave is that... you help me,
Jeongguk. You're like no one I've known. You care, and you love, and you're beautiful." Taehyung
whispered. Jeongguk looked up at him. Taehyung smiled. "And I really do like that."

Jeongguk gave him a small smile. "V-Veronica... with her, it's more than just words sometimes.
She- she hurts me sometimes, Jeongguk. I don't know how to explain it. I don't wish to. Every time
I think of it, bile rises up my throat."

"T-the indents in your neck and scratches... is that her?" Jeongguk asked wearily, and Taehyung
tensed. "Taehyung, that's not good. Why don't you talk to her about-"

"Look at me." Taehyung muttered, and Jeongguk frowned. "I'm a man, for god's sake, getting
beaten up by his own wife. I'm incompetent, absolutely. How humiliating." Taehyung said bitterly.
"Any other man would've stopped her by now."
"By hurting her as well," Jeongguk said. "But you won't allow yourself hurt her like that. You're a
good man." Jeongguk promised.

Taehyung took a deep breath. He looked at Jeongguk. "What about you? With- with Rosie?"

"She's starting to dislike me." Jeongguk chuckled, voice dry. "She said she wishes I was like other
men."

Taehyung frowned. "She doesn't like that my insufficiency has forced her into working. She's got
three sisters, all with manly, strong-headed, bloody brick-like husbands who drink beer every night
and wear undershirts. One's a policeman, one's a mechanic, one's a fireman." Jeongguk grumbled.

"Ah, don't worry. You'll make more money than them." Taehyung reassured. Jeongguk giggled out,
and Taehyung did as well. Jeongguk hit his chest, but Taehyung tangled their fingers together.

There was a small silence. Jeongguk wanted to kiss him, but it'd be too risky. Jeongguk looked
down. "Today, this boy was telling me how... whatever it is that we're doing- it's-it's considered a
mental illness."

"It's also considered a crime," Taehyung said. Jeongguk gulped. He looked away. "Why are we
doing this, Taehyung? I-it's far too risky," Jeongguk said, panicked tone of voice.

"Why does anyone love?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk looked at him. "It's to fulfill one's hearts
desires. One cannot simply choose who they love."

"But we can. We can choose, Taehyung. We're just succumbing into our recklessness." Jeongguk
said, closing his eyes and laying his head against Taehyung's shoulder.

"Everyone's reckless," Taehyung said. Jeongguk shook his head. "No. Just us. You don't hear
of this-this homosexuality thing often, do you? No! Because it's wrong. And we're stupid. And
reckless."

Taehyung chuckled. He pinched Jeongguk's cheek. "You know what, I think I want to take you
somewhere."

"Where? France, again? Let's run away." Jeongguk said.

"Why, when I said that you called me maidenly!" Taehyung scoffed. Taehyung got up from the
bench. It was darker now. Jeongguk followed him.

"You say a lot of things, Taehyung. You can't blame me! You're absolutely impulsive." Jeongguk
said, and Taehyung patted his bum rather quickly, making Jeongguk inch away from him in fright.

"Again, you were the one who came to my house about 4 times asking me to bend you over my
desk-"

"Stop talking." Jeongguk said, and Taehyung laughed.

They got into the car. Taehyung gave Jackson an odd address, one that Jeongguk knows is in a part
of town that's not very... safe. Jackson drove, however. Taehyung and Jeongguk didn't kiss, only
talked.

Taehyung suddenly told Jackson to stop the car when they reached an alleyway. Jeongguk was
slightly frightened by the darkness and hollowness of this street but trusted Taehyung. Both got out
of the car. Taehyung told Jackson to wait someplace else.
"Where are we? I don't like it here." Jeongguk mumbled poutily. Taehyung sighed, and then linked
his arm around Jeongguk's small waist.

"Brattish." Taehyung said again, and Jeongguk moved his arm and glared at him playfully.
Taehyung led him down the alleyway, and Jeongguk could hear loud jazz music and laughter.
Jeongguk gulped.

"I-I don't like this, Taehyung. I want to go back. Please." Jeongguk said, clinging to Taehyung's
shirt.

"God, are you afraid? Calm down, angel. Nothing's going to happen to you, not while I'm here."
Taehyung said. Jeongguk noticed two drunk men walking down the street, laughing loudly to each
other, speaking in loud Scottish accents.

They finally reached the outside of a small, dingy door. A man stood in front of it, dressed in
crooked glasses, suspenders, a hat. Jeongguk stood behind Taehyung. The man eyed them. He
raised his hand forward. Taehyung took out enough money and placed it in his palm.

"Don't cause trouble." The glasses wearing man spoke roughly and then opened the door for them.
Once he did, the sound of jazz music got louder. Jeongguk was more than confused.

"Won't," Taehyung said, and then walked into the door. Jeongguk walked behind him, and they
began walking down a dark hallway. Jeongguk grabbed onto his palm.

"I will be hurt."

"Don't be irrational." Taehyung chuckled, and then pushed open another door. Jeongguk's eyes
grew big.

It was... a bar. "Oh," Jeongguk said, looking around. "I thought it would be some sort of demonic
hellish drug cartel. I got scared, Taehyung. We could've just gone to Jimin's bar."

"Ah, yes. His round face was rather eye-catching. What's his name again?" Taehyung asked.
Jeongguk looked away, biting the inside of his cheek. "Nevermind."

"I'm only teasing, darling," Taehyung said, and then put his arm around Jeongguk's waist.
Jeongguk pushed it off in a hurry, seeing the dozens of men in the bar, drinking. Though it was a
bar, the atmosphere was unlike that one of Jimin's. It was quieter. People talked in pairs, some
eyeing Taehyung and Jeongguk.

Jeongguk looked around. There was a stage up front. "Where are we?" Jeongguk asked. Taehyung
took out a cigarette. He then patted his trousers and groaned.

"Forgot m'lighter," Taehyung grumbled. Jeongguk walked up to him, but then saw a younger boy,
probably 17, rush over to Taehyung, almost stumbling. He looked far too young to be in here.

"Need a lighter, sir?" The boy asked, hair ginger, eyes big and blue. Taehyung snickered and
nodded. The boy reached a lighter out and lit the end of Taehyung's cigarette, and then smiled up at
him. Taehyung took the cigarette out with his fingers.

"Thanks," Taehyung said. The boy shook his head. "No- no problem, sir." He said. Jeongguk
walked closer to Taehyung, pinching his arm. The younger boy looked at the two and then walked
away.

Jeongguk paid no mind to that. Couldn't help but feel a lot of the men looking at him. Jeongguk felt
hesitant at this place, but then heard a voice from the microphone. "Presenting, tonight's performer,
Champagne!"

Everyone in the bar began clapping and cheering as the lights dimmed down. A spotlight fell on
the stage. Jeongguk stuck closer to Taehyung now that the lights were gone, and Taehyung's arm
went around his waist. Through a haze of smoke, Jeongguk spotted a young woman enter the
stage.

The cheers went louder. The woman had long black hair, sleek dark eyes, bright red lips, and wore
a black short dress, along with a feathery black boa around her neck. "She's pretty," Jeongguk said,
and Taehyung hummed, nodding.

Music began, and at once, the girl began moving around the stage, her slim legs showing beneath
the short black dress. Women didn't usually wear clothes like such, but this must be a bar where
such things were alright- since it was all men. Jeongguk hadn't been to bars like these, found them
fearful. He looked at Taehyung as the girl on stage held onto the pole, dancing around it.

"Why did you bring me here?" Jeongguk asked.

"For the show," Taehyung said as if it were obvious. Jeongguk rose his eyebrow but looked back to
the stage.

The woman was mouthing at the words, looking probably close to Jeongguk's age. Her long hair
swished around her magically, her eyebrows sharp, cheekbones high, nose pointed. She was
beautiful. And danced around the pole rather erotically, quite obviously being sexual. But the
audience cheered and clapped, screaming her name- Champagne.

After the show was over, the woman walked off the stage, smiling a small smirk at the audience.
The men clapped. Jeongguk turned to Taehyung. "How long are we going to-"

"You said we were being reckless, stupid," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk stilled. "That we can
choose. That we're succumbing. Didn't you?" Taehyung continued, soft. Jeongguk looked down.

"Yes, but Taehyung, it's-"

"Don't speak, my love," Taehyung whispered. "Look around you."

Jeongguk looked up. He was confused for a second but then froze, eyes going wide. In the side of
the room, a man was on another man's lap, both their lips locked.

"O-oh-" Jeongguk let out, breathless. No one paid mind, just walked around as if it was normal. As
if it didn't matter. As if it wasn't a crime, as if- Jeongguk looked around again. All these men. All
these men, looking at them. But there were more. More men kissing, hugging, laughing, and oh-

"You think all these people here choose to be stupid, Jeongguk?" Taehyung asked.

"E-everyone here is..." Jeongguk trailed, and then looked at Taehyung. His eyes brightened. "We-
we aren't t-the only ones?" Jeongguk squeaked, smiling big.

"Aw, your boy's rather adorable, isn't he?" The bartender voiced, and Jeongguk turned and looked
at the man. Jeongguk blushed, feeling strange at this occurrence. What he felt so ashamed of all
this time, it- it was normal?

"Yeah, he is." Taehyung grinned, and the bartender looked at Jeongguk. "No, love. You aren't the
only ones. There are thousands around the world. More than that. Don't be afraid."
Jeongguk looked at Taehyung. "This is surreal," Jeongguk whispered. Taehyung chuckled. "It
really is," Taehyung whispered and kissed Jeongguk's forehead. "Imagine a world where two men
can be together, and no one minds. It sounds beautiful but impossible."

"It'll never happen." The bartender snickered. "We'd had to pay the police stations hundreds of
pounds, you know, so they'd let this bar stay opened." The bartender said.

"Rotten policemen, as usual," Taehyung muttered, and then looked at the bartender. "Say, could I
go meet Champagne? She's a friend of mine,"

"She is?" Jeongguk asked. The bartender snickered. "Right. That's what they all say. But sure, go
ahead. She doesn't mind visitors as handsome as you."

Taehyung gave him a small smile, and then led Jeongguk around and towards the back of the bar.
"Who is she? Some sort of exotic performer?"

"Of kinds," Taehyung said, and then walked with him towards a room. Jeongguk gulped. "Are you
sure we should meet her? I mean, we don't even-"

"Relax. I know her. I've been here before." Taehyung said, and then pushed the door open. The
moment he did, Jeongguk stood behind Taehyung, hesitant. He spotted Champagne sitting in front
of a mirror, putting on rouge.

She looked from the mirror. "It's you again. You came here around 1957, didn't you?" She said,
her voice rough. Jeongguk saw Taehyung walk in, smirking. Jeongguk followed.

"You remember?" Taehyung said. Champagne stood up, still in her short dress. "Couldn't forget a
face like yours." She clicked her tongue, and then looked at Jeongguk. "And I see you've brought a
friend this time."

"Yes. This is Jeongguk." Taehyung said. Jeongguk smiled shyly. "H-hello. Your performance was
wonderful." Jeongguk said quickly. "Must- must be strange working in a place like this, being a
woman and all," Jeongguk said.

Champagne giggled, and then looked at Taehyung, who had his lips sealed. Champagne cooed.
"Aw, you didn't tell him? That's sweet," Champagne said, and then looked at Jeongguk. "I'm
flatted, Jeongguk. But I'm no woman."

Jeongguk stilled. His eyes grew big. "W-what?" Jeongguk asked, confused. Champagne suddenly
walked up to him, and then raised her hand forward.

"I'm a drag queen. Do you know what those are?" Champagne asked, and Jeongguk went forward
to raise... his hand. "O-oh. No. I- um. Don't. S-sorry." Jeongguk squeaked, not noticing how much
bigger his hand was.

"That's alright. We're men who dress up as women to perform. It's rather fun." Champagne said,
and then looked at Taehyung. "You're horrible, leaving him out of the blue like that."

"I just wanted to see his reaction, Yoongi," Taehyung said. Yoongi, that must've been
'Champagne's' name.

"What're you doing here anyway?" Yoongi asked, taking a pearl earring off. Jeongguk stood by the
wall, reminding himself to whine at Taehyung later for letting him embarrass himself like that.

"Jeonggukie here's a bit afraid. Just wanted to give him insight to this, really. How many people
are legitimately queer," Taehyung said. Yoongi shuddered.

"Dislike that word immensely. I don't like 'homosexual' either. There are new words coming up,
you know. Gay. It's much more playful." Yoongi said, grinning.

"Hm. Oh well, these labels are rather high-strung. Now I only came to say hi. Can't repeat our
actions of two years ago, as I have a guest this time." Taehyung cleared his throat, and Yoongi
smiled at him.

Jeongguk looked at Taehyung with slight anger. Yoongi chuckled. "Your boy's getting a little
angry over there. Nonetheless, I'll see you later, hopefully?"

"Of course. Goodbye." Taehyung said, walking to the door. "Goodbye, Yoongi," Jeongguk said,
and Yoongi gave him a small smile as if finding him adorable. Jeongguk followed Taehyung out
and then hit his arm.

"W-why would you let me humiliate myself like that!" Jeongguk cried. Taehyung smirked.
"S'fun."

Taehyung then looked at Jeongguk, who stood against the wall. Taehyung walked forward and
latched their lips together, moving them kindly. Jeongguk gripped his shirt and kissed him back.
And when they later got into the car, they kissed the whole way, Jeongguk not caring that Jackson
was looking.

And later, when Jeongguk was in Taehyung's bedroom- he called Rosie and let her know he
had work with Jimin. She said it was alright. And later, Jeongguk kissed Taehyung once more and
they made love till the depths of night.

Jeongguk wasn't as afraid of himself anymore.

**
 Chapter 18

**

"Put your head on my shoulder," The soft melody gushed around the room like wind, clasping all
that's vacant in its whim. "Hold me in your arms, baby," The song continued, drowning out the
breathless moans which filled the study room.

Jeongguk's head lolled back onto Taehyung's wide shoulder, his chest heaving, sheen with sweat.
Jeongguk's virtuous body was seated on Taehyung's lap, both sitting on the brown armchair in
Taehyung's study. Taehyung's hands delicately guided his hips, so Taehyung's cock slipped in and
out of Jeongguk in a fluid motion. Taehyung's touch was like a flame to a candle, Jeongguk melted
onto him. Like hot wax, his mind hazed with the overwhelming pleasure, his eyes blurred.

It was hot, the air around them significantly thicker, moisture spreading across their tan bodies,
their nudity only making the heat rise. Jeongguk's hands were up, fingers fumbling with locks of
Taehyung's blonde hair. They were quiet, entranced in the music, in each other. Taehyung kissed
his neck, his soft skin pale, moonlike, begging to be bitten.

"Tae-" Jeongguk gasped. "T-Taehyung-" Jeongguk babbled, losing his senses, his power, his self-
control. Taehyung's cock pulsated inside of him, slamming into his prostate ever so fluently.
Jeongguk cried, arching his back. Taehyung roamed his hands down to his ass, loving how needy
his boy was, how eager.

"So beautiful." Taehyung murmured the only words in his mind. "My, my beautiful boy."

"Y-yours," Jeongguk whispered, heart beating rapidly, his thoughts circling in the whirlpool of his
mind in the midst of his steaming exchange.

"Just a kiss goodnight, maybe," Paul Anka's voice sang from the record player. "You and I will fall
in love,"

Love, Jeongguk's eyes opened as Taehyung murmured small praises into the boy's nape. Jeongguk's
stomach fluttered in the reprise, the spontaneous notion making his head spin. Taehyung pressed in
tightly.

"Come for me, angel," Taehyung whispered, his voice seeming in Jeongguk's head and outside of
it, everywhere, circling him, surrounding him, taking over. Jeongguk came in command, quiet but
whimpering, ribbons of come spurting out. Taehyung sighed into his ear, grinning.

"God, you're perfect," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk only had to bounce on his cock twice more for
the older man to come. Jeongguk heard Taehyung grunt and continued bouncing up his length,
making him come harder, tense. Taehyung smacked Jeongguk's thigh to stop him, and then the boy
lifted off of the older man and lay on his lap, limp.

"Oh, lamb." Taehyung breathed out as Jeongguk placed his head onto his. "Have I worn you out?"

"You always do," Jeongguk said with a fond smile on his face.

It felt as if months and months had passed when it'd only been a week. Jeongguk gave a rather lame
reasoning for his temporary absence to Rosie, who nodded uncaringly and let him be. Jeongguk
was noticing how increasingly callous the woman was becoming but didn't say anything to it.

"You might as well live here, Jeongguk," Taehyung whispered, and then smiled at the boy.
"Wouldn't that be lovely? Waking up beside you every morning. Pure bliss."

"It really would," Jeongguk said, cheeks reddening slightly. "Though I must admit, there is a
solution to this peculiarity," Jeongguk said, smiling. "Let's run away."

"I wish you would've asked me sooner, my love," Taehyung mumbled, brown eyes glancing away.
"I wish we were more foolish, daring, younger. I'd had seen a pretty boy like you and ran with your
hand in mine in an instant. We could've taken a boat and gone to Greece. Lived our lives
pretending to be brothers." Taehyung snickered.

"We can be foolish and daring. We just- we just need to not care." Jeongguk said, words light. "We
can leave behind this- this world that dictates who we shall or shan't love."

Taehyung closed his eyes, chuckling. "Baby," Taehyung whispered, and Jeongguk tensed. "Don't
speak into the void. You'll lead yourself to disappointment. You know we can't just leave. We have
lives, and jobs, and women who we are sworn to in marital grace."

Jeongguk stirred for a second, and then hummed, laying back onto Taehyung's head, closing his
eyes. Taehyung wrapped his arms around his bare waist and then sighed. "I wish this was easier
too."

"I-I wish I could stay with you all the time, Taehyung. I never want to leave. I've grown fond of
you, so- so much." Jeongguk let out, voice small. He didn't know what the feeling in his stomach
was, but he was afraid that it was something stronger than fondness.

It was love.

"I'm fond of you as well, my darling," Taehyung reassured, looking up. "I've never met someone so
perfect for me. You- you're dazzling. Like a dream. I'm afraid I'll wake up sometimes." Taehyung
murmured.

Jeongguk lay against him. "Let's... stay asleep for a little while more," Jeongguk said. Taehyung
hummed, holding him tightly.

After a while, they dressed sparsely and cooked food. Jeongguk felt like his cheeks might erupt
from how much they burned. Taehyung would wrap his arms around Jeongguk's waist and make a
silly comment, and it'd send Jeongguk giggling.

Jeongguk stirred the pot of food and lifted the wooden spoon which was filled with the broth.
Jeongguk led it to Taehyung's lips, as Taehyung was slotted behind him. Taehyung tasted the broth
and then hummed. "Tastes good."

Jeongguk brought the spoon away. Then, Taehyung leaned down and kissed Jeongguk on the lips.
Jeongguk smiled into his lips, giggling. Taehyung pulled away and then hummed once more.
"Tastes better."

Jeongguk and Taehyung finished preparing their meal and then ate it over an hour, drinking their
wine, going slow. Their conversation was as fluid as their drinks, going on and on and never once
stopping. Not until they were finished, full of wine and food.

Then Taehyung took him to the bedroom, and they lay down, kissing slowly. Taehyung brushed
his thumb in circles over Jeongguk's tummy which was a little more visible after eating the food.
Jeongguk whined in embarrassment, but Taehyung kissed his worries away, smiling.

They fell asleep with ease.

The next day Jeongguk left for his own home because he had his assistant job to go to. Taehyung
wasn't upset this time, just kissed him dearly, for he had work of his own too. Jeongguk reached
home quickly and found it empty. Rosie must've gone to work already.

Jeongguk got ready for work, showered, put on a simple white shirt and black trousers with shoes.
He brushed his hair, moisturized, sprayed a little bit of his perfume which's smell he adored.
Jeongguk applied lip balm (Taehyung bought him one after he complained about how chapped his
lips were getting) and headed to work.

Work felt like it was 19 hours long and yet, somehow, also 3 minutes long.

"Ehm, get the papers next time. Handwrite it, yeah? I can't deal with all this type-writer nonsense."
Jeongguk's old, old boss gruffed, voice ragged, clearly from smoking 3 packs a day. Jeongguk
nodded.

"Yes sir," Jeongguk said, picking his things up and placing them in his side bag. "You know,
in my day, we never had all these advancements-"

Oh god, here comes his tangent. "I'm aware, sir." Jeongguk nodded, giving him a tight-lipped
smile. "I must leave now. See you tomorrow." Jeongguk said, and then rushed away and out of the
building.

Jeongguk walked out of the building and began walking down the pathway towards his house.
While walking, a certain brightly colored boutique caught his attention. It was called 'Pink
Wall'. Jeongguk stopped for a second and looked through the window.

In the exhibit, mannequins stood wearing what looked like a flaring poodle skirt, but a little shorter
than usual. Must be the new fashion, Jeongguk thought, looking in. One skirt on a mannequin
caught his eye. It was pale yellow, with pink roses embroidered on its middle. Jeongguk felt his
insides stir.

He didn't know why, but he couldn't stop looking at the skirt, blinking his doe eyes in interest. He
found himself leaning in, eyeing the pretty color, the pretty stitching done on it, how pretty it'd
look if someone were wearing it. Jeongguk's breath hitched.

He shook his head slightly, turning away. His heart began racing, not liking the absurdly ludicrous
thoughts which were filling his head. His mouth went dry as he walked two steps away from the
boutique, but then, he paused.

He thought of Yoongi, from that night, for a split second. His insides eased. Jeongguk turned to
look at the store once more. He took a deep breath, and allowed his impulse to override him, and
walked into the store.

Jeongguk walked to that skirt and then ran his fingers down the material. It was wonderfully soft,
with some layers underneath, which would give it a good tuft. Jeongguk's breathing fastened,
getting anxious.

"Good evening sir." A woman's voice came. Jeongguk turned around in an instant, eyes big, seeing
a woman in a white shirt and black skirt. She probably worked there. "Can I help you with
anything?"

Jeongguk shook his head quickly. "N-no. I'll just be going-" Jeongguk stammered, the fear of being
exposed worrying him. He headed for the door once more, but then spotted the gorgeous skirt
again, and stopped. He brought his thumbnail up to his lips, nibbling on it unconsciously, nervous.

"Are you looking to buy a gift for a lady, sir? Perhaps a wife or sister?" The woman asked.
Jeongguk paused.

Oh, what a perfect alibi. "Yes," Jeongguk said, turning around to look at her. "Yes, for- for
my... sister, yes." Jeongguk lied through his teeth, giving her a timid smile.

"Of course! I think it's ever so charming when men go out of their way to buy presents like these
for their loved ones." She gushed. Jeongguk nodded, thankful that she didn't suspect anything.

"I like that skirt. I mean- I think my sister would like it." Jeongguk said, pointing at the yellow
skirt.

The woman hummed. "Yes, it's very fashionable currently." The woman said, grabbing the skirt.
"What size would your sister be?"

Jeongguk looked away for a few seconds and then gulped. "Well, um- we-we're twins. So,
possibly the same size." Jeongguk nodded.

The woman looked at him, confused. "But you don't exactly have a woman's body, sir. It might not
be the right fit-"

"My sister doesn't exactly have a woman's body either." Jeongguk laughed. God, what am I
doing?? The woman working at the shop laughed uncomfortably for a second and then nodded.

"Alright." She said. She measured Jeongguk's waist rather quickly, and Jeongguk was almost
blushing from this. She got the measurements and then found the right skirt. Jeongguk was overly
excited when he saw her fold it and place it into a bag neatly.

Jeongguk paid. "I hope your sister likes it." The woman smiled, writing his receipt.

"Oh, she will," Jeongguk said, nodding. The woman handed him the packet, and Jeongguk skipped
out, gleaming.

Jeongguk went home and hid the packet in the deepest corner of his study room, where Rosie
would never find it. Rosie would probably return and hour or two later. So, Jeongguk began
reading a book as usual.

He read a few paragraphs but then got bored. His thoughts were far too wildered in the excitement
of that skirt. He didn't know why he bought it, in honesty. Wearing it would be far too humiliating
for his own self. But, perhaps, at times, he could just stare at the fabric and envision himself
wearing it. Or just have it, for a keepsake.

Jeongguk closed his book and then walked to Rosie's dresser, seating himself down on the chair.
Jeongguk admired his reflection, eyes glued on the diamond that sparkled. Jeongguk wanted more.
He wanted more jewels, perhaps pearls, to cascade on his neck.

Taehyung would get him more jewels, wouldn't he? Maybe if Jeongguk asked kindly. But he
shouldn't seem too greedy, that wouldn't be right of him. Oh, the thought of Taehyung buying him
all kinds of luxurious things made him giggle.

Jeongguk opened one of the drawers, looking for his lip balm, but instead, saw all of Rosie's
makeup. Jeongguk's eyes sparkled, and he took out a circular pink case. He opened it and saw
rouge.

He looked at himself in the mirror, and then got a little excited, and took Rosie's brush out. He
tapped the brush onto the blush gently, and then brushed it onto his cheeks. Jeongguk saw the pink
hue on his cheeks and smiled innocently.

Jeongguk did the same on his other cheek and then placed them down, back in the drawer.
Jeongguk found something called 'mascara' and took it out, seeing a small black tip with bristles.
Jeongguk assumed it went on his eyelashes, that's what the box read. Jeongguk fluttered them
against his lashes, and then looked at himself. Ooh, they were a little longer.

How fun, Jeongguk thought. He could have a whole day of nothing but this. Jeongguk took out his
glossy lip balm and put it on his lips, liking the red tint. He applied another layer, and then
suddenly heard the bedroom door push open.

"Jeongguk- what are you doing?" Rosie's voice came. Jeongguk dropped the lip gloss in a hurry
and turned his head, eyes big.

"N-nothing." Jeongguk stammered, getting up quickly and pushing the drawers close. "What are
you doing back so early?"

Rosie, in a morose way, frowned. She walked closer to him, eyeing his face. Jeongguk looked
away. "Are you wearing... makeup?"

"No." Jeongguk urged out. "I'm not. I was j-just-"

"W-what are you doing wearing my makeup, Jeongguk?" Rosie asked, eyes big. She looked
frightened, almost. Jeongguk shook his head.

"I'm not. I swear, I j-just- I was just putting on cream, and- I d-don't know. I must've have put- put
on the wrong thing or s-something." Jeongguk said hastily, looking down.

Rosie hesitated for a second and then nodded slowly. "Of course. Yes, of course. What else would
it be?" Rosie chuckled to herself, turning around.

Jeongguk sighed in relief, seeing her way away. "Why're you home so early?"

Rosie's shoulders tensed, and she gulped. Rosie turned around, hesitant. "Jeongguk I, um- I g-got
fired."

"What?" Jeongguk let out, his nervousness washing away. "Why? Why did they-"

"I don't know! They- they just did. They told me to leave and- and- I don't know. I think they're
sacking a bunch of the girls off, honestly." Rosie said timidly. "I'm sorry."

Jeongguk sighed. "It's alright. I suppose you could find a job in- in a hospital nearby-"

"Actually, I- um- if-if you don't mind, that is- I was hoping I could join my sisters in Bristol. My
eldest sister just had her child, and I wanted to go visit-"
"Yes. Absolutely. You can go." Jeongguk said, rather quickly. "I wouldn't want you to miss such a
thing."

"That's very kind of you, thank you," Rosie said, but looked a little affronted by Jeongguk's rather
brash response. Jeongguk hummed and then walked out of the room, towards the kitchen.

"Well, I assume you'll still get your pay for this month," Jeongguk said. Rosie looked confused.
"What?"

Jeongguk leaned against the counter, waiting by the boiling water. "I mean, if you got fired, the
hospital is obligated to pay you the next pay check. Especially when terminated out of warning like
this. Y'know, it's really not right to just fire people like this, with no explanation. They only do it so
freely because the employees are women. It's unfair."

Rosie blinked. "Oh. Um... I don't think I'll receive the paycheck." Rosie murmured, and then turned
away.

"Why not? That legally not allowed, Rosie." Jeongguk chuckled, and then simmered down when
he saw Rosie looking away hesitantly. "Rosie? What's wrong?"

Rosie looked at him for a few seconds and then tsked. "J-Jeongguk, I d-didn't get fired." Rosie let
out. She tightened her grip on the sofa. "I resigned."

"What?" Jeongguk asked, standing up properly. He walked out of the kitchen. "Why would you do
that?"

Rosie gulped. "You've been doing so much work with Taehyung lately, I assumed you've got a job
or-or something!" Rosie said. Jeongguk frowned.

"I haven't. I'd tell you if I did. And even if I did get a job, this is something you should discuss with
me-" Jeongguk began.

"I don't like it, Jeongguk," Rosie said, abrupt. "I don't like working! I-I've read on it.
Psychologically, women are better at work. That's what m-my mum says. And- and none of my
sisters work! Nor do any of the girls back at the village." Rosie said quickly.

Jeongguk looked at her in disbelief. "There's a difference, Rosie. You won't have to work once
we're financially stable. Currently, we're not-"

"What about Jimin? He's earning less than you are at that pub, isn't he? Yet he-"

"Jimin doesn't have a wife, Rosie! And if he did, she'd probably be working!" Jeongguk snapped,
growing angry. He didn't like raising his voice, but currently, he couldn't help it. "I-I don't
understand, why would you not talk to me about this? I can't completely support the two of us yet,
Rosie."

"You can try, can't you? Men have been doing that for years and years now. Why can't you do it?"
Rosie cried, looking timid.

"I-" Jeongguk began, and then gulped. "I don't know! I d-don't know how other men do it, I can't. I
want us to b-be stable, and be comfortable at least. That can only happen if we both have jobs!
Once- once I finish law school, I'll get a job, and you don't have to work anymore, Rosie. It's that
simple-"

"Don't you feel inferior knowing your wife works because of you?" Rosie asked suddenly.
Jeongguk stilled.

Jeongguk couldn't help but let the one part of himself he's hidden from everyone but
Taehyung come out. His scared, more feeble side. Jeongguk felt tears rise in his eyes and looked at
her. "O-Of course I do. But t-that's how life is, Rosie. I can't h-help-" Jeongguk began, and felt
tears fall down.

"And you're crying," Rosie let out in disbelief. Jeongguk felt himself grow defensive, fists
tightening. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to be rude but- I just- I d-don't understand you sometimes,"
Rosie said weakly.

Jeongguk turned and grabbed his keys, fumbling with them in his hand. He felt like he was going
to throw up. "G-go be with your sisters. I'll see you once you're back."

"Jeongguk, d-don't go. Please. Don't leave me alone again," Rosie said faintly.

Jeongguk walked out, closing the door behind him. He ran down the steps and towards Taehyung's
house, tears in his eyes. He rushed to his doorstep and knocked on his door hastily, tears pooling in
his eyes.

The door opened. Taehyung saw Jeongguk, and his small smile dropped instantly. "What's wrong?"
He asked. Jeongguk leaped forward, hugging him tightly. He burst into tears.

"Baby, don't cry, my sweet thing," Taehyung whispered, closing the door behind him. Taehyung
hugged Jeongguk back, worried. "Hey, hey, what's wrong?"

"R-Rosie-" Jeongguk tried explaining but began crying into Taehyung's chest like a baby.
Taehyung tsked and lifted him up from under his thighs, carrying him into the living room.

"It's okay, you don't have to talk about it if you don't wish to," Taehyung whispered, and then sat
down on the couch, the boy on his lap. Jeongguk whimpered, tears running down his cheeks.

"I-I don't like her. I only w-want you." Jeongguk said, a lump in his throat. Taehyung kissed his
forehead.

"I feel the same way, little one," Taehyung said, and then kissed his chin. Jeongguk eased into his
touch and then sniffled.

"I'm a disappointment of a man," Jeongguk whispered. Taehyung chuckled. "We all are. Don't fret.
What they say man is, is far from what man really is." Taehyung said, stroking Jeongguk's cheek.
Jeongguk didn't really understand but nodded.

"Hold me forever." Jeongguk pleaded. Taehyung smiled, kissing his cheek. "Gladly."

Taehyung held the boy for tens of minutes, waiting for the boy to stop crying and bubbling out
incoherent sentences about his hatred for society in general. Taehyung was sure he heard the boy
talking about some yellow skirt in the middle of his whining. Finally, the younger stopped and just
looked at Taehyung.

"Y-you're amazing," Jeongguk said.

"Far from it, actually," Taehyung said softly. Jeongguk giggled, hitting his chest lightly.

Both looked at each other closely and pressed their lips together. Soft, tingling, gentle. Taehyung
pushed him onto the sofa, pressing him against the arm of it. Jeongguk squeaked into his mouth
from the sensation, and Taehyung smiled, fond. He pulled away and kissed his lips again, and once
more, and once more. Taehyung then began pressing small kisses to his neck. Jeongguk gripped
the man's shoulders, tipping his head back and allowing for Taehyung's touch to consume him.

Jeongguk wrapped his legs around his waist, biting his lip. Taehyung nipped at his neck, sucking
at the soft skin. Jeongguk giggled at how Taehyung pinched his waist, and then opened his eyes,
wanting to gaze into Taehyung's darker ones.

Jeongguk looked up and then stopped.

"O-oh-" Jeongguk let out, eyes widening. "Taehyung-" Jeongguk said abruptly, pushing Taehyung
off him.

Taehyung stumbled back and frowned. He looked to the side and felt every inch of him freeze
when he saw Veronica.

Veronica was stood by the entrance of the living room, her eyes wide in disbelief, lips parted. She
dropped the suitcase she was holding when the men looked at her. Her eyes were darkened, jaw
slack.

"Veronica," Taehyung began. He stood up. Jeongguk got up from the couch himself, his eyes big in
worry. Taehyung began walking to her, keeping his composure calm "Look- it isn't- it isn't what
you think-"

Veronica was silent. Taehyung walked closer to her, and all Jeongguk could do was watch. She
didn't say a word, didn't move an inch. "Let's just talk about this maturely. I'll tell you everything-
"

Veronica slapped him across the face.

Jeongguk flinched and widened his eyes, bringing his hand to his lips, clasping them over it.
Taehyung stood there, head facing the side from where he got slapped.

Veronica let her eyes lead to Jeongguk slowly. "Get out of my house." She growled lowly.
Jeongguk nodded hurriedly, rushing towards the door. He walked past them, but before running
out, he gave Taehyung a worried look.

Taehyung was looking down, smirking. Jeongguk's breath hitched in confusion, and he wordlessly
ran out, not wanting to make it worse for the man.

Right when he thought things were going to be okay, it came tumbling down.

**
 Chapter 19
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

**

Taehyung stood there, the silence overbearing the London house. The maroon curtains draped
across the windows, shielding the outside from the heavy hearts leaking onto floors like wine.
Taehyung looked up very slowly, the red mark of hand on his cheek.

Veronica stood by the entrance of the living room, eyes darkened beyond belief, the pounding of
her heart being heard for miles. She stepped closer to Taehyung, fists clenched.

"A man, you- you've been doing things with a man?!" Veronica said, soft, seething.

Taehyung kept quiet. Veronica took her handbag and threw it at Taehyung, the hard leather case
hitting Taehyung on the chest. Taehyung took a step back.

"A man!" Veronica shouted. "What's wrong with you? How fucking low do you have to stoop?"

Taehyung's silence was emerging as a sign of his uncaring attitude, to Veronica at least. So she
smiled, wicked. "This is all a joke to you, isn't it? No, why? Why would you care? When your
wife's worried sick because her mother's ill!" Veronica cried, shaking with rage. "Tell me. Did you
get him in our bedroom- our- our house before?"

"Yeah," Taehyung said softly, looking down.

Veronica stilled at the sudden answer. She gulped. "How- h-how many times-"

"A month or more," Taehyung replied, toying with his wedding ring. "On our bed, too," Taehyung
said, finally looking at her. He smirked, gradual. "Fucked him every day while you were gone,
Veronica."

"Wha-" Veronica began, eyes wide. "What's wrong with you?" Veronica said, voice wavering.

Taehyung was still smirking. "You sound troubled."

"You're out of your mind. That's what- that's what you are. Our agreement was that we tell each
other when we do a thing with another person." Veronica snipped. "And- and you're not supposed
to do it with men-"

"Why not?" Taehyung asked, leaning against the bar table.

"Because- because it's wrong, Taehyung! That's why not!" Veronica cried. Taehyung chuckled,
looking away.

"I guess I didn't know that," Taehyung said, looking around idly. Mindlessly.

Veronica couldn't take it. She walked closer to him and slapped him across the face once more,
hard. Taehyung clutched his cheek, digging his nails in, looking down.

"Stop behaving as-as if this doesn't matter. It does, i-it's important! You're not allowed-" Veronica
began roughly, but Taehyung grabbed her wrist with one firm hand before she could do anything
again. Taehyung looked at her, eyes dripping with anger.

"I'm not allowed?" Taehyung growled lowly. "While you fuck and fuck and fuck every single man
that walks close to you, hm? I'm not allowed?" Taehyung asked. Veronica looked at him with
widened eyes.

"Why did you come back, Veronica? Why?" Taehyung asked stiffly. Veronica looked at him. She
paused for a second but spoke quickly.

"My mother's gotten worse. I-I came to have a talk with- with the head of the school to get a longer
leave. I came to collect more things to take back, and-" Veronica began, and then looked down. "I
just wanted to see if you were alright before going back again."

"Right," Taehyung said, turning around. He walked to the bar table smoothly, feet padding against
the wooden floors, the overbearing silence like a symbol of their unsteadiness. Taehyung lifted a
glass flask of whiskey, opening the lid and pouring it into an empty glass, more than usual.

"You came to see if I was alright." Taehyung chuckled, turning around, a glass of whiskey in his
hand. "As if you've ever cared about me,"

"I have," Veronica scoffed, affronted by this accusation. "I've always cared about you, Taehyung.
Don't you dare pretend like I'm the one in the wrong here. Out of all things- of all things, a man?
You know how wrong it is! Did you do it to spite me, Taehyung? Is that it?"

Taehyung went silent. Veronica walked closer to him, her prim and proper self looking as if it were
on the verge of breaking. "You used him for your sex antics, is that not it? My my, he must be
so awfully head over heels for you, Taehyung. I heard your conversations on the telephone, you
know?" Veronica said, soft. "How you pretended to care. He doesn't know the vicious man that
you are. You did it all so you could laugh at it later. Knowing you disrupted your wife's sanity-"

Taehyung grabbed her wrist, eyes going dark. He smiled, wicked. "That's where you're wrong, my
love," Taehyung whispered. Veronica hesitated, frowning.

"I might have done it at first to spite you, Veronica. You know me too well. But I've realized that
he has everything I've wanted all my life. Everything you're not." Taehyung spat, slow, menacing.
"Everything I could ever need-"

"Shut up." Veronica snapped, pulling away from his hold. Taehyung looked enraged, as if close to
spilling, breaking. "Don't you dare speak another word. I can't believe you would do something so
heinous. How could you do something like this? While I'm out grieving over my ill mother? Do
you have no morals, Taehyung? No heart? No love-" Veronica began.

"I don't love you anymore, Veronica!" Taehyung shouted, his voice shaky, abrupt.

It was as if a glass had broken, for the only sound in the room was the utter silence following
Taehyung's words. Taehyung looked at her, slow, breathing heavily. He shook his head. "I don't."
He whispered.

Veronica stood there, eyes wide, lips parted slightly. Taehyung looked at her, waited. Her eyes
filled with tears. "W-what?" She let out, voice breaking.
"I've fallen out of love. What we had, that is gone. It was in years past that our love felt like a
flame, but-but we've burnt out. I just- I d-don't-" Taehyung said.

"How c-can you say such a thing?" Veronica whispered, weak. "I've been with you s-since we were
children. What d-do you want? Do you want me to cook and- and clean and be like Rosie? You
know I'm not that type of woman, T-Taehyung-"

"I don't want you to be that kind of woman. But I don't want to be with your kind of woman either."
Taehyung said. "Don't pretend you care. Don't pretend you still love. Can't you feel it, Veronica?
The absence of what was once blazing? You hurt me, Veronica. You don't understand. You think I
can take it b-because I'm a man- I can't. I can't fucking take the shouting, the manipulation, the
way you degrade me because-" Taehyung took a deep breath.

"Your anger against t-the men in your life is being taken out on me, the only man that fully cares
about you. Y-you pushed me aside years ago, Veronica. Did you not think I cared when you slept
with other men? I-I wept like a child. I love- loved you s-so fucking much, Veronica. I never
wanted to be that man who sleeps around despite having a wife."

Veronica was stunned, silent, tears leaking out of her black eyes. "If you c-cared so much you
should've told me then-"

"I did!" Taehyung shouted, the anger overtaking him. "I told you it hurt me back then! You didn't
listen, you only cared about yourself. You always did. You're a selfish, conniving bitch, Veronica."
Taehyung growled the end part, fists tightened.

Veronica had tears rushing out of her eyes, unable to look at him. "W-what do you want from me?
I'll change. I'll do better. I-"

Taehyung walked out of the living room. Veronica sniffled, seeing him through her blurry eyes.
She wiped her flowing tears and followed him. "Taehyung?" She called desperately, seeing him
dissapear into the study. She waited by the door. "Talk to me, Taehyung. W-we can fix this-"

"We can't." Taehyung said, opening his drawers, looking for something. "Can't fix something so
broken." Taehyung muttered.

Veronica watched in confusion as Taehyung took out an envelope. He walked over to her. Veronica
looked at the tall man. "I d-don't know what i-it is you want from me, Taehyung-" She began, but
before she could finish, Taehyung put the envelope in her hands.

"What I want is a divorce." Taehyung said gently, voice low, eyes faded of any light. Veronica
froze.

She looked at the paper with widened eyes, widened glassy eyes, hand shaking. Taehyung looked
down at her, no morose. "What I want is for us to separate. Find peace someplace else. I don't want
you anymore. You don't want me either. Let's settle this how it is."

"No." Veronica cried softly, looking up at him. "No! I'm n-not- I'm not agreeing to whatever this
is! I'm not getting a fucking divorce, Taehyung-"

"I've already signed the papers, Veronica." Taehyung said, walking away from her. Veronica
watched him in shock as he headed to the door. "All you need to do is sign it as well." He said, not
looking back.

"Taehyung? Don't do this. Where a-are you going? To- to that boy? You're being irrational,
Taehyung! You can't be happy with him, you know that right? The world won't allow it, I won't
allow it-" Veronica said, sounding weak, weaker than ever.

"That's not your decision, nor the world's." Taehyung said, grabbing a coat. He looked at her,
glancing. "Sign it before you leave for your mother's." Taehyung said, before walking out of the
door and closing it roughly behind him.

Taehyung took a deep breath, walking out of his gated home. He didn't know the time, nor what
would happen. But his feet took him to a place, following only the rhythm of his heart, not the
muddle in his mind.

Taehyung found himself outside Jeongguk's house. He knocked on the door, and it swung open
rather fast. Jeongguk stood there, eyes and face red. Upon seeing Taehyung, his eyes grew large.

"O-oh-" Jeongguk let out. Taehyung wrapped his arms around him tightly, not letting him talk.
"Taehyung," Jeongguk whispered, speaking his name as if it were sacred, a fear that was earlier in
his heart going away.

"Tell me Rosie's not here," Taehyung asked, holding him. Jeongguk pulled Taehyung into the
house, closing the front door.

"She isn't. She just left in a taxi to go to the train station." Jeongguk said. They looked at each other
for a moment, before attaching their lips together.

Taehyung kissed him warmly, gently. Jeongguk took his lips as if they were fleeting, would vanish
faster than they appeared. Taehyung pulled away from the kiss, breathing against his pink lips.

"T-Taehyung what happened? With- with Veronica?" Jeongguk asked, afraid. He looked up at the
golden-haired man. Taehyung gulped.

"There isn't much to say. We fought, as usual. She was horrified, I expected her to be. She began
crying. I don't know what-" Taehyung began, closing his eyes. Jeongguk hugged him tightly, and
Taehyung held onto him, relaxing in his touch.

"Did s-she tell you to leave or something?" Jeongguk asked, lip bitten in worry. Taehyung
snickered.

"Quite the contrary. I told her I want a divorce." Taehyung said. Jeongguk's eyes widened.

"What??" Jeongguk yelped, mouth falling. "You- you did? Oh my god- did- did she agree to it?
What- what did she say? Y-you just- you just told her that? What did-"

"Calm down." Taehyung said softly, fondly. Jeongguk stopped speaking and then walked with
Taehyung to his bedroom. They walked into the small room, Taehyung looking around, and then
Jeongguk sat down on the bed. Taehyung sat down with him.

"She said no, of course. But I told her I didn't love her anymore. Told her that this is what I wanted,
and she should sign it before she leaves." Taehyung said, looking away.

Jeongguk hid his face in Taehyung's shoulder for a second. As upset as this should make him,
Jeongguk couldn't help but feel happy. Jeongguk looked up at Taehyung, who smiled a little.

"You're happy about this, are you little angel?" Taehyung asked. Jeongguk shook his head, looking
up at him.

"No. It's terrible. I'm sorry." Jeongguk said quickly. Taehyung put his hand on Jeongguk's thigh,
looking down.

"It's alright. I... feel free. Don't know why. It's something I've wanted for ages, but never had the
courage to say aloud." Taehyung said, trailing.

Jeongguk lifted Taehyung's chin up, their eyes meeting. Jeongguk looked at him for a few seconds,
before kissing him softly. Taehyung kissed him back. Jeongguk parted, and then touched their
noses. "I'm proud of you. You give me courage, Taehyung."

"Do I?" Taehyung hummed, smiling. Jeongguk giggled.

"Yes. Utmost." Jeongguk said. Taehyung grabbed Jeongguk suddenly, pulling him atop his lap.
Jeongguk gasped in surprise and then hit Taehyung's chest lightly. Taehyung fell onto his bed, and
Jeongguk on top of him.

They kissed a few more times, gentle, teasing. Jeongguk giggled into his lips, and Taehyung into
his. Taehyung massaged the soft skin under his shirt, making the boy whine. Taehyung kissed him
some more, and then pulled away.

"Are you wearing makeup?" Taehyung suddenly said, eyebrows raised. Jeongguk stilled.

"Y-yes. I just- I put it on f-for fun. I'm sorry." Jeongguk said quickly, looking away, embarassed.

"You look beautiful," Taehyung said. Jeongguk looked at him with big eyes, and then kissed him
again, with more pressure this time. Taehyung smiled at his eagerness, circling his waist.

They fell asleep after an hour of talking and kissing, in each other's arms.

Jeongguk made Taehyung a warm cup of coffee, and placed it on the table in front of him.
Taehyung looked up from his hands which were pressed against his face. The man looked stressed
out, even so early at the morning.

"Hey," Jeongguk said softly. Taehyung looked at the mug of coffee and smiled. "Thank you
baby."

"That's alright. Are you?" Jeongguk asked. Taehyung gulped, shaking his head.

"I-I'm not sure. I can't help but feel as if I've made a mistake." Taehyung muttered, chewing his
words. Jeongguk felt a cinch in his heart, but rubbed Taehyung's shoulder reassuringly.

"Don't worry. It'll sort itself out. You wanted this for a long time, didn't you? So don't fret, my love.
Time solves everything." Jeongguk said, hushed. Taehyung wrapped an arm around his waist and
pressed his forehead against his stomach as a silent thanks. Jeongguk brushed his hair, smiling.

They ate breakfast later, reading the morning news, making small comments. Taehyung helped
Jeongguk clean up, not helping much, rather, messing about. Jeongguk couldn't help but smile at
the older's childlike tendencies.
Both took a bath, a long one, until their fingers were pruned. They'd gotten lost in the bubbly
waters and soft giggles which radiated off one another. After the bath, they got dressed for their
work. Taehyung borrowed some of Jeongguk's clothes (that being, his old shirt that he'd let
Jeongguk wear) and they both headed out.

And both returned hours later. Jeongguk came back early. Taehyung walked into the small
apartment and groaned, picking Jeongguk up, ignoring his whines of protest, and carrying him into
the bedroom to coddle. Their gentle, soft kisses very quickly turned into most lustful, more heated.

Jeongguk ended up riding Taehyung, or not really, because Taehyung was sat up, directing his
movement. Jeongguk found it ever so arousing, blushing pink, gripping Taehyung's hair and
moving up and down his cock.

They both came. They lay in bed for a little while more, but then cleaned up. Jeongguk took out
lasagna from the fridge and warmed it up. Taehyung kissed his neck and thanked him many times.
Both ate dinner, and then went to sleep fulfilled.

Jeongguk couldn't help think about how perfect it was, and how he wouldn't mind having this.

The domesticity, the longing, the gentle exchanges and giggles, the love. The love. Jeongguk felt
nothing else while looking into Taehyung's eyes. Couldn't help wishing he could have it forever.

And so, two weeks passed like that.

One evening, after a long day of law school classes and dealing with irritating batchmates,
Jeongguk returned home, hoping to find Taehyung. He didn't. So Jeongguk made dinner while he
was there.

Except, Taehyung didn't return all night.

Jeongguk felt nervous. What could be wrong? Maybe Taehyung went to his house for one night. It
could be possible.

Taehyung's absence was worrisome. Especially since now, Jeongguk felt more bonded with the
older than he ever had. Felt more bonded with the older than he ever had with anyone.

Jeongguk wasn't sure what love was. Wasn't sure if he'd ever felt it. But right now, right at this
moment, he felt as if love was all he felt. To be in love. It felt foreign, but so- so right.

Taehyung never left Jeongguk's mind, he's was always there; mentally if not physically. It was
incomprehensible. He's was Jeongguk's stable force, stability in a world filled with chaos.

This feeling was so strange; it stretched throughout his whole body. It was overwhelming, yet
made him feel complete. It had no bound nor length nor depth; it was absolute. It felt as though
Jeongguk was in a dangerous fire, yet completely safe at the same time. It felt as though Jeongguk's
heart was dancing around his chest; and a hole, he was never aware was there, had been filled. He
felt so light like he was on top of the world yet his heart was constricting and it felt as if there was
no oxygen in his lungs.
Jeongguk was in love with Taehyung and he couldn't believe he'd only just realized it.

Jeongguk felt as if he'd fall at any moment from the overwhelming pulse his heart raced it. The
only hum in his mind was one begging him to spill to Taehyung and be honest. But at the same
time, it felt as though things could spiral into something horribly wrong.

Swift knocks rapped against the door, and Jeongguk turned his head against it with widened eyes.
A small smile reached his face. It could only be Taehyung, no one else.

Jeongguk rushed against the door and reached it open, hurried. A thunder blasted outside, rain
falling heavily. Taehyung stood there, dripping wet.

"Taehyung?" Jeongguk said, confused as to the boy's complete drenched state.

Taehyung's eyes were whitened, widened. It was as if he'd just decided something. As if he'd just
found something. As if he'd just realised something. He took a step into Jeongguk's house.

"Jeongguk," Taehyung whispered softly. He sounded faint, dazed, lost. Jeongguk put his hands on
Taehyung's arms, and Taehyung very easily lay limp and fell into Jeongguk's hold.

"Taehyungie w-what's wrong?" Jeongguk said, brushing his wet hair. Jeongguk heard a sniffle and
pulled away to take a close look at him, and was confounded when he found the man smiling.

"Jeongguk," Taehyung said again, smiling widely. "I-I'm so- I-I can't imagine this. I can't believe
it." Taehyung said quickly. Jeongguk smiled a little, confused as to why the man looked so elated.

"What happened?" Jeongguk asked, holding onto his arms. Taehyung gripped Jeongguk's waist
tightly, looking as if his happiness was overwhelming him, overtaking him.

Taehyung didn't say anything, just moved away from the boy. Jeongguk giggled at his oddity,
tilting his head. His heart beated fast. He just wanted to say it. He wanted to tell Taehyung how in
love he was with him.

Taehyung turned his head, looking out the window at the rain, breathing heavily, smiling.
Jeongguk gulped. "Why did you c-come? What's going on?" Jeongguk piped.

Taehyung put his hands against his face, smiling widely. He turned around. Jeongguk's breath
hitched. If he didn't say it now, he might never.

"T-Taehyung?" Jeongguk said, softly. "Taehyung I think... all this time we've spent together, how-
how close we've been. I think I might... I might've fallen in love with-" Jeongguk said with a
smile.

"Jeongguk," Taehyung trailed, and then turned around, lips curved in a smile. "Veronica's
pregnant," Taehyung said, cutting him off.

Jeongguk froze.

He felt rooted in his place. An aganozing pain spread across his chest like a burning fire, and his
eyes grew larger and knees almost gave out at Taehyung's words. Jeongguk looked at him, shock,
disbelief, an earthquake of emotions flurrying in his stomach. No words came out. He couldn't
speak.

"She's been pregnant for a month or so. She- she went to the doctors back at her mother's. That's
what she came here to tell me. I-" Taehyung began, and then brushed his hand through his hair,
shaking his head. "I can't believe it."

Jeongguk felt broken, like a fragile glass that'd been made so perfectly, so intricately, with such
precision- finally shattering into pieces at once, left to lay for eternity.

"That's-" Jeongguk began, choked, words unwiling to come out. "T-that's good-"

"It's amazing," Taehyung said, looking overjoyed. "I've wanted to have a child for- for so long,
Jeongguk. Finally, it's happened," Taehyung smiled, looking up. "I honestly can't believe it. She
told me today. She'd gone back home for two weeks and came back now that it's confirmed,"

Jeongguk felt tears rising in his eyes, couldn't help it. But he smiled. He smiled for Taehyung. "I'm
so happy for you." Jeongguk breathed out, a tear trickling down his cheek. "Is i-it yours? Are you
sure?" Jeongguk whispered, hopeful.

"Yes. Doctors did one of those- um- dna tests. Rather futuristic. It's my child. Our- it's our child."
Taehyung said, hands clenched. "She went off to sleep, so I came here to tell you. I- god, I can't
wait. If it's a boy, or a girl. We'll decorate the house to fit him or her, we'll-"

Jeongguk held it in, held in the sobs, the screams, the absolute devastation he felt at the moment.
He blinked instead, looking at Taehyung. Taehyung looked at him, and then walked over to him
and hugged him tightly.

"Thank you," Taehyung said softly, and Jeongguk gripped onto his shirt, pressing his head into his
neck, shaking, but not letting it show. "I feel like you've made me a better man, Jeongguk. It
almost feels as if this thing between us, though it might've been short, has made me someone I can
be happy with."

Jeongguk gripped onto his shirt tighter. "Is i-it over?" Jeongguk asked, faint, light, words barely
coherent.

Taehyung looked at Jeongguk. It was as if the excitement of the news had corroded Taehyung's
ability to sense Jeongguk's pain. Taehyung smiled. "Wasn't it beautiful while it lasted?"

Jeongguk tried not to cry. But he couldn't help it. Tears trickled down his chin. Taehyung cupped
his face. "Don't cry, pretty. Don't. You know I'll still talk to you-"

Jeongguk began crying louder, knowing how horrible he must seem, that Taehyung had just told
him such good news- and his reaction was to sob like a child. Jeongguk couldn't help it, he clamped
his hands over his mouth, unable to breathe, unable to see.

"Darling?" Taehyung's voice said, but it was as if Jeongguk was trapped in himself, darkness
around him, and Taehyung was far away- so, so far away.

"Leave. Please, just l-leave." Jeongguk let out, not knowing how loud or silent he was, not knowing
if Taehyung heard, not knowing if he could breathe.

Taehyung left. Jeongguk was alone, laying on his flood, screaming his lungs out crying, sobbing,
tears not stopping, his throat hoarse from the cries he let out at the circumstances that ruined the
only love he'd ever felt.
 A child to be born, and a love which was killed.

**

Chapter End Notes

yikes ): also sorry im so shit at replying to comments? but thank u so much for them ):
i appreciate it
 Chapter 20

**

Earlier

Taehyung stepped out of his office building, seeing the sky gloomy and darkening, clouds forming
in a tight symmetry to later pour rainwater onto the busy streets. Taehyung took out a cigarette, a
constant itching in his neck dying out when his lips met the thin lit cigarette.

His car stopped in front of his building, and Jackson hurried out and opened the door for Taehyung.
Taehyung stepped into the back of the car, sighing to himself, muscles aching from the long day of
strenuous law work.

"To Jeongguk's," Taehyung said. Jackson looked at him through the rearview mirror.

"Actually- um- miss Veronica is back from home. She told me to get you back to the house,"
Jackson said, looking nervous.

Taehyung frowned. "She's back?"

For two weeks, ever since Taehyung had told Veronica he wanted a divorce, he hadn't been to his
house. Perhaps once or twice to fetch clothes, but otherwise, the sight of the house that once was
memorable and full of love now reminded Taehyung of hurt and her.

Veronica went back to her hometown, assumingly. And suddenly, she was back. Taehyung's jaw
tightened. Hopefully, it was to discuss the divorce papers. Because Taehyung wanted to see
Jeongguk.

With Jeongguk, everything was easy. Simple. Jeongguk was beautiful in the bedroom and equally
so outside of it. His delicate moonflower. Everything about him made Taehyung's heart sigh. He
was a fresh summer's day in a cold brazing winter.

The car arrived at the house, and Taehyung stepped out of it rather quickly, ignoring the drizzle
that had begun. He opened the house door and stepped inside, seeing the dim lights on in the study
and nowhere else.

"Veronica?" Taehyung called, a slight annoyance in his tone. He took his coat off and hung it on
the rack, walking to the study.

Veronica was stood against the wall, by the black telephone, with the shell of it against her ear,
listening. She looked pale. She noticed his presence.

Taehyung stepped in and his eyes drew to the divorce papers sitting on his desk. Unsigned,
probably even unread. Taehyung scoffed. "Of course. Couldn't expect anything less from the most
stubborn woman herself,"
Taehyung looked at her. Her eyes were wide, glazed. "Why did you beckon me here? Do you have
a pen? Is it to sign the papers, Veronica? If not then I rather not be around you."

"T-Taehyung," Veronica let out softly. Taehyung turned around, looking at his shelves. "I'll get
you a pen. I'll do everything it takes to get rid of-"

Veronica dropped the telephone from her hands, letting it swing from the curled wire. She fell to
the floor, hands clasped against her mouth.

Taehyung turned around, shoulders tensing. He rushed towards her, grabbing the telephone,
someone still speaking on the other side. Taehyung lifted it to his ear, and-

"I'm so sorry," A voice on the other phone cracked, rough. " Your m-mother passed away two h-
hours ago. I'm not sure how it-"

Taehyung looked at Veronica, his eyes growing wide, whitened. For a moment, he forgot about
what had happened. Veronica was on the floor, shaking, eyes wide with tears. Taehyung ended the
phone call and kneeled in front of her.

"Veronica," Taehyung said gently. Veronica looked at him, and tears began rolling down her
porcelain cheeks. It rarely did. Taehyung gulped, a pang of sudden guilt and sorrow forming in his
chest. "I'm- I'm so sorry,"

"I d-didn't-" Veronica began, her voice watery, barely legible. "D-didn't even say goodbye,"

Taehyung wrapped his arms around her, and she tucked her head in his neck, bursting into loud
cries. Taehyung brushed her black hair. "I'm so sorry."

Veronica continued crying, loud, like a child, a broken child who'd just lost her mother. Her bawls
grew louder, tears staining Taehyung's shirt. Taehyung held onto her tighter, closing his eyes. He
held for some time.

"Veronica," Taehyung said softly. Her cries softened. "It's okay. She's not in pain anymore. She
loves you so, she'll continue to."

Veronica held onto him. "I-I was such a bad daughter," Veronica trembled, looking down. "I ran
away from home. Did everything she told me not to. I was never what she wanted."

"She was so proud of you, love," Taehyung said, brushing the tears away from her cheeks. "You
know she was. And she knew how much you loved her."

Veronica looked down. Taehyung kissed her forehead, seeing her eyes. "You can cry," Taehyung
said gently, and Veronica felt tears roll down her cheeks. "It's alright."

After some time, Taehyung helped her up and sat her down on the couch. He went to the kitchen to
get a glass of water for her and went back to the living room. She was sat on one side, hand against
her temple. He gave her the glass of water, and she took a small sip of it.

"I'll ask Jackson to get us dinner," Taehyung said swiftly. "Take rest for now. I'll call your
workplace and tell them you need some time from work-"

"Taehyung," Veronica said, voice hoarse. Taehyung stopped in his steps and looked at her. She
was looking into the wall. "I... I c-can't let you divorce me."

Taehyung felt guilt rising in his chest. "Veronica, it's fine. Don't think about that right now, it isn't
what's important. We can discuss it later-"

"No. W-we can't." Veronica said, quiet. "I have to tell you now. I-" Veronica took a deep breath,
and then looked at him. "I must. I can't keep it to myself. Mother- mother would want me to tell
you-"

Taehyung walked closer to her. "What is it?" He asked.

Veronica looked at Taehyung for a few seconds and then gulped. She looked as if she was thinking
of something elaborate, something more stretched, some that'd make more sense, but she couldn't.
It had to be curt and short. "I'm pregnant."

Taehyung froze. He felt time stop moving around him. Taehyung looked at her, eyes blank. "W-
what?"

"I'd been with mother for- for so long, spent ages with her in the hospital. She could tell s-
something was wrong with me and urged me to check with doctors. I- um- I did a pregnancy test of
sorts, and-"

"Veronica." Taehyung breathed out, hands clenched. "Who's- who's is it?"

Veronica looked down. Taehyung's jaw gritted. "It could b-be anyone's. You've slept with-
I'm sorry- you've slept with so many men, and-"

"Taehyung, i-it's yours," Veronica said, trailing, words feathery, unreal. "I've a-always used
condoms or-or some sort of contraceptive with other men. But n-not with you. Not with-"

Taehyung's eyes widened. Veronica looked at him, felt a fleeting sense, as if Taehyung would
leave instantly. "Listen to m-me, please. I know- I know y-you'll think I'm telling you this because
y-you said to get divorced. But- but that's what I came home to tell you in the beginning. But then I
found you h-here with Jeongguk-"

"You're pregnant?" Taehyung breathed out, still in shock. "With m-my child?"

"Our ch-child." Veronica bubbled out, and then looked at Taehyung fearfully.

Taehyung stopped and looked at her for moments, moments where his mind moved like engines,
thinking, whirring, unable to comprehend that- her- no- their child would be- Taehyung let go of
his past pain momentarily.

He stepped forward, and Veronica stood up from the sofa. "P-please don't leave-" Veronica begun
softly, but Taehyung enveloped her in his arms and tucked his head in his neck. She wrapped her
arms around him.

"You're n-not angered?"

"No." Taehyung said, shaking his head. He wrapped his arms around. "This- t-this is astounding
news, Veronica. It- it changes a lot of things-"

"I'm sorry. For- for everything I've done to y-you. I'm ashamed of who I tried to be. This- this
strong woman. My m-mother told me. She s-said that she'd been forced to a marriage at a young a-
age, with a man who hit her and didn't care. She s-said I was so lucky with you, Taehyung.
So so lucky-"

Taehyung kissed her carefully, arms tight around her waist. Veronica kissed Taehyung back, and
then they pulled away. Taehyung smiled.

"I reckon you are bit a lucky with me," Taehyung said. Veronica giggled, looking up at him.

Veronica showed him ultrasound pictures. Taehyung saw a little figure in the picture and smiled
widely, looking at her. After, he took her to bed and she fell asleep, drained. Taehyung, in
realization and overjoyed by what happened, did the first thing that felt right.

He went to visit Jeongguk.

Jeongguk lay against his bed, sitting on his floor, a wine bottle in his hand which he twirled around
with his nimble fingers, only a little bit of the red liquid left in the bottom of the glass. Jeongguk
lowered his head against his bed, and took the last sip of the wine, and then pulled away, looking
up at the cieling.

"Pregnant." Jeongguk repeated, a bit of the red wine dripping out of his lips. "Fucking bitch," He
grumbled under his breath, tossing the wine bottle to the side, letting it sit with the collection of
other wine bottles that had collected in the side of the room.

Jeongguk felt drunk, drunk off his mind, didn't know the last time he had anything but alcohol. It'd
been days since Taehyung came to him and told him his wife was pregnant with their child. How
splendid. Jeongguk drank in celebration of his misery.

Jeongguk climbed up from the floor, almost falling, wearing nothing but a large white shirt of
Taehyung's. Jeongguk looked at himself in the mirror, stumbling. "Pregnant." Jeongguk repeated,
slurring. "Stupid whore. P-pregnant. N-not even his child. S'... someone else's." Jeongguk said to
the mirror.

Jeongguk looked at himself in the mirror, and then felt tears arise to his eyes. "W-why couldn't you
be a woman?" Jeongguk let out, whispering to his reflection. He grabbed a pink lipstick from the
dresser and opened it up, applying it steadily to his lips.

"Mm' m'can be a woman. I'll- I'll be p-pregnant." Jeongguk slurred, grabbing blush, opening it and
taking a brush to apply it to his cheeks. He looked at his reflection and giggled, mind hazy.

Jeongguk fixed his brown hair, and then got up from the dresser table seat, walking to his study.
He looked around for a little pink bag, and finally found it and drew it out. He opened it up and
took out the pretty yellow skirt.

Jeongguk giggled to himself and pulled it up his legs, tucking his white shirt into it and fitting it on
his waist. Jeongguk twirled around in his yellow skirt and ran his hand down the pink flowers
embroidered on it. He smiled.

Jeongguk then stumbled over to the telephone and picked it up, hearing nothing on the other line.
Jeongguk bit his lip messily and somehow dialed a number, feeling as if he was about to fall. The
phone rung one, two, three times, and then it got picked up.

"Hello?"
"Taehyungiee," Jeongguk slurred softly, twirling his finger around the wire, leaning against the
wall. "Come here,"

"Jeongguk? Is that you? God, are you drunk?"

"M-maybe." Jeongguk giggled. "Why? I-is Taehyungie mad? Come here and p-punish me then,
daddy. Won't you spank me for being s-such a bad little girl?" Jeongguk gushed into the phone,
and then burst into giggles, hitting his head against the wall. "C-can't say daddy now, can I?
Oops..." Jeongguk squeaked.

There was a long pause. "Jeongguk.... don't do this. It's not right to get drunk like this. I'll come
over, make sure you're alright."

"Tell me, K-Kim Taehyung." Jeongguk said, eyes drooping. "If- if I had a vagina... would you still
have left?"

"I'll arrive in 5 minutes, Jeongguk. Don't be caustic."

"Mmm. Y-you'd like if I had a pussy, won't you? I could g-give you as many babies as you want,"
Jeongguk mused. "V-Veronica couldn't. I'll g-give you as many babies, Taehyung. Taehyung? H-
hello?"

Jeongguk listened for sound on the other line, but heard nothing. He took a deep breath, and then
let the phone swing down. He trotted his way to the kitchen and looked for another bottle of wine.
He didn't find anything, which made him grow more frustrated.

The doorbell rang, and Jeongguk gasped, turning towards it headily. Jeongguk rushed towards the
door, liking how the long fabric of the skirt moved with him, and then opened it wide.

"Jeo-" Taehyung began, and then stopped mid-word. His darkened eyes grew soft, large, his mouth
falling open slightly.

Jeongguk stood there, leaning against the door to hold him up, lips pink and bitten, eyes dark,
cheeks red from both alcohol and blush, his white shirt tucked into a flowy yellow skirt,
enunciating his already small waist.

Jeongguk grabbed Taehyung and brought him into the house, out of his mind. "I'll be a woman for
you, Taehyung."

"Jeongguk... what- what is all this?" Taehyung whispered.

Jeongguk threw his arms around Taehyung, pouting a little. "You're being a little mean, Mr. Kim.
Won't you fuck me like the pretty little damsel I am?"

Taehyung sighed, closing the front door behind him and then looking around. He sniffed the air. "It
reeks of alcohol," Taehyung muttered, and then saw Jeongguk's law books lying dusty on the
countertop. "Have you not been attending your classes?"

"H-how could I when a nasty wicked old man broke my heart?" Jeongguk said, clutching his chest,
eyes big, looking up at him, doll-like. "Won't you fix it? Fix it for me, Taehyungie."

"Jeongguk are you really this distressed? My my. Maybe I should call Rosie and tell her to return,"
Taehyung said, dark eyebrows furrowed, blonde hair falling on his eyes. Taehyung left Jeongguk
and went into his bedroom.
"There's wine bottles everywhere, Jeongguk! Have you eaten breakfast or- or lunch? Anything?"

"I want nothing in my mouth but your cock." Jeongguk said, standing by the door. Taehyung
looked at him, eyebrow raised. Jeongguk walked up to him, swaying.

"Let me." Jeongguk whined, looking at Taehyung's crotch. Jeongguk put his hand on Taehyung's
chest, but Taehyung pushed him off in an instant.

"Jeongguk. You're acting foolish! What's gotten into you?" Taehyung snapped, taken aback by
Jeongguk. Jeongguk moved towards him, gripping his arms.

"I'll be so much better than her, Taehyung. You know this. I know this." Jeongguk slurred. "You
know you want to put your cock in me. Fuck me till I can't walk." Jeongguk said, pressing against
him. "Please, Taehyung- just fuck me-"

"Jeongguk-"

"I want your cock. Nothing but your cock in me." Jeongguk said, getting down on his knees in front
of him. Taehyung looked at him, surprised. As calm and collected as Taehyung usually was, right
now he was not in the mood.

Taehyung lifted him by his collar, and pushed him back lightly. "What is wrong with you? Have
you forgotten you're a man??"

Jeongguk stumbled against the wall, eyes growing wide. "You're drunk off your mind, and it's
Saturday morning! You're wearing a skirt, and- and I'm certain that's my shirt. You're acting crude,
uncouth, unlike yourself."

"What do you expect?!" Jeongguk shouted, sounding close to tears. "Y-you just walk in one day
and tell me you- you're leaving me a-alone, and- and going with her! Because s-she's pregnant!
How d-do you want me to take it?"

"Not this badly." Taehyung muttered. Jeongguk felt tears pool in his eyes, the ground sway below
him.

"I will. I'm taking it horribly. You- you're a terrible man. A terrible, horrible man, and I h-hope-"
Jeongguk began, and then felt tears rushing down his eyes. "I h-hope you're never happy ever
again!"

Jeongguk closed his eyes, quivering, tears not stopping. Taehyung looked at him silently, not
saying anything. "I h-hope Veronica falls ill and I ho-hope you divorce h-her and never find
anyone!" Jeongguk said, words barely making sense, barely conjoined, muddled from his cries.

"Jeongguk," Taehyung said softly, knowing these words were from pain. "I'll leave you alone.
Please don't drink. Sleep it off and then eat something-"

"D-don't go." Jeongguk squeaked, eyes growing frightful. "Don't go p-please, Taehyung. I'm sorry.
Please don't l-leave me alone. I'll d-do anything you want."

Taehyung walked to the door of the house, and Jeongguk followed desperately. "Taehyung... p-
please-"

"Jeongguk. You need to be alone for some while. We need to be apart. I can understand my sudden
parting might've been frightful, but you need to be a little mature and understanding. I can't leave
everything behind for you."
"W-why not?" Jeongguk asked weakly.

Taehyung sighed. "I've been married to her for 8 whole years, Jeongguk. She's pregnant with our
child. Do you expect me to leave all of it for someone I've known for 3 months or so? That too, a
man??"

Jeongguk stopped. He looked down, suddenly feeling embarrassed by having thrown himself at
Taehyung like this, looking so maidenly and stupid. Jeongguk felt tears in his eyes. Taehyung saw
his expression and walked closer to him.

"Jeongguk... please don't be upset." Taehyung said, cupping his cheeks.

"I c-can't not be." Jeongguk weeped softly. "Y-you're everything I've ever wanted."

"I'm sorry." Taehyung said, wrapping his arms around his waist. Jeongguk hugged him tightly,
falling into his chest, tears rolling down his cheeks. "I'm sorry, moonflower."

Jeongguk burst into tears, fragile, shaking. Taehyung hugged him tighter, eyes closed. "I-I have a
duty as a husband and a man. I've put them away for you, my darling. I can't anymore."

"I know." Jeongguk said weakly. Jeongguk held onto Taehyung's shirt. "C-can't you just... stay for
a little while?"

"I can't." Taehyung whispered, unable to see Jeongguk crying like this. "It'll be bad for the both of
us."

Jeongguk looked up at Taehyung, and took a deep breath. "Taehyung." Jeongguk cried softly.
Tears rushed down his face. "I'm in l-love with you, Taehyung. Please don't go. I'm s-so in love
with you," Jeongguk burst into tears, hiding his face in Taehyung's chest.

"Fuck." Taehyung whispered. Jeongguk looked at him, and saw his eyes wide, glazed. "W-why did
you have to say those words?"

"Be-because they're true." Jeongguk said, faintly.

Taehyung cradled his waist and pressed their lips together. Jeongguk felt his insides elate as if
some flower bloomed in the pit of his stomach. Jeongguk kissed him back, overwhelmed with joy,
fumbling to grip his shirt.

Taehyung pulled away just as fast. "Sorry. Oh god- I-I apologize." Taehyung stammered quickly.
Jeongguk didn't let him finish and began kissing him again.

Taehyung kissed him back, but then pulled away. "Jeongguk I must go. I can't just-"

Jeongguk kissed him again, dragging him by the shirt to the sofa, both tumbling onto it, Taehyung
on top of him. Jeongguk kissed him roughly, lips moving, tongue doing its dance. Taehyung
brought his hand up Jeongguk's thigh, up his skirt, and then-

"God, I can't. I can't, Jeongguk." Taehyung said quickly, getting up from the couch. "I-I need to go
to the doctor's- I have to go with- with Veronica for a test-"

"And after you find out about the birth of your child, you'll come to fuck me, won't you?"
Jeongguk blinked his pretty big eyes, tilting his head.

Taehyung froze by the door. "No. No I won't. Jeongguk, get that off your mind, please. Forget
about anything that-"

Jeongguk kissed his mouth. Taehyung kissed him back, unable to stop himself. Jeongguk pulled
away and looked up at him. "I think you will."

Taehyung looked down at him for a few seconds, cheeks reddened, and then turned around and
walked out of the house, closing the door behind him. Jeongguk smiled to himself, turning around
and leaning against the closed door.

How utterly wrong. His wife pregnant and his mind cluttered with the thoughts of fucking a man.

**
 Chapter 21
Chapter Notes

i probably should've mentioned this earlier but can you guys not comment telling me
the story is really shit or that you can't read it anymore bc of whatever reason? like i
really rather not see those type of comments. i know this book took a sudden turn, im
not stupid. if you can't read it, click out.

im not a professional author, if there are mistakes, please point them out nicely instead
of being rude about it. this fanfiction isn't perfect- and honestly, this was why i was
kind of scared to publish to ao3 in the first place lol. im new to this, so sorry if its bad.

See the end of the chapter for more notes

**

"You haven't been to work for 3 weeks."

Jeongguk jolted his head up, bags heavy under his black eyes. "Yes. Sorry." Jeongguk grumbled
out, clearly not had enough sleep, head hurting. He sat behind the desk which he sat at every
weekend for his assistant job, holding a pen tightly, pretending to write things.

His boss, the old man, Mr. Adams stood in front of him, irked. "Is it law school? Has it been taking
a lot out of you?"

"Yes sir," Jeongguk said, not telling him the part where he's missed all his classes.

"Alright. Well, today I have to go to court." Mr. Adams said, sighing. He looked down at his
watch, and then back at Jeongguk. "You'll assist me. I assume you have all the papers, do you?"

"Oh my." Jeongguk breathed out, suddenly very awake. "Is today Wednesday? Oh gosh, today I
assist you to court." Jeongguk reminded himself. He'd completely forgotten. The past few weeks
have been so mentally exhausting that he couldn't help but let time slip past him.

"Jeongguk, take this job seriously, or you'll have it taken away." Mr. Adams snapped. Jeongguk
nodded, taking out the papers and a file.

He opened it, quickly reminding himself of the case. He didn't have to do much, was more there to
observe, but it was good to keep his mind on track. A case. Right. They were defending a man
who'd been accused of money laundering. Right. Usual things. Jeongguk was quite certain the man
had actually concealed the origins of illegally obtained money in foreign banks, but oh well. Being
a lawyer meant sometimes you defended the bad person.

Jeongguk got up from his seat, following the older man out the building. He looked stressed, which
he never did. "Is that bastard going to show up to court this time, or just send his assistant again?"

"Wh-who?" Jeongguk asked, eyes big.

"Kim Taehyung." Mr. Adams said, voice full or irritation. Jeongguk froze.

"T-the lawyer from the other side i-is Kim Taehyung?" Jeongguk breathed out, his heart
palpitating. The older man didn't respond. Jeongguk looked at himself in the reflection of a
window. He looked terrible, in an old blue shirt and black trousers, hair matted, his eyes dull.

Jeongguk took a deep breath and followed the older man out of the building. The court wasn't too
far away, so the car ride to there was short, thankfully. They reached and walked towards the trial
room rather fast, Jeongguk following.

Their defendant was already present, looking nervous, hands wringing with one another. He was
the one 'accused' of money laundering. Some rich scum who wanted to be richer, as usual. He got
up upon spotting Jeongguk and Mr. Adams.

"That cocky fucking bastard's here already," The man grumbled, and Jeongguk tensed behind Mr.
Adams. "Son of a bitch. He doesn't have any knowledge of my doings, does he? You promised he
wouldn't catch a hold of anything," The man snapped to Mr. Adams.

"We'll do our best." Mr. Adams said, but he sounded unsure. Jeongguk followed the two men into
the courtroom and then stilled by the doorway. The two men in front of him went forward to sit in
the front, but Jeongguk couldn't find himself to move.

Taehyung stood there, talking to his assistant, a woman. He looked rather intimidating, his blonde
hair slightly longer from the back, brushed. He wore a black suit, looking ravishingly attractive as
always, which disdained Jeongguk to no end.

"Jeongguk," Mr. Adams snapped. Jeongguk heard his name and brought his head up, rushing over
to the older man. "The files," He said, and Jeongguk handed them over, and then turned his head a
little.

Taehyung was looking at him. He looked... apprehensive. But Taehyung brought himself back and
went back to discussing something silently with his assistant.

The trial began. The jury sat on the other side, numerous men and women. Jeongguk sat on a seat,
watching as Mr. Adams stood up, Taehyung standing on the other side. The judge walked in.
Everyone rose up. The judge motioned everyone to be seated, and Jeongguk sat down.

The trial began.

They began with their opening statements. "Your honor," Mr. Adams spoke, voice coarse. "My
client is innocent. The money inherited by him which was put into foreign reserves was not
originated from illegal activities. The evidence is clearly stated in those papers, your honor."

Some papers were handed to the judge. He looked over them. He hummed. Mr. Adams spoke some
more. Jeongguk didn't really pay attention. He was old and boring and spoke for far too long.
Everyone looked as if they were tempted to rise from their wooden seats and walk out of here.

"Mr. Kim, your opening statements, please." The judge said, looking over at Taehyung, his eyes
knowing as if waiting for some elaborate speech. Jeongguk had never seen Taehyung in court
before, but everyone always talked about it as if it was something glorious.
"Your honor, Mr. Adams is 89 years old and frankly, is no better than his client," Taehyung began,
a smug look on his face. Mr. Adams looked rather offended as he was only 71. "Those papers are
fabricated. They've got electrical typewriters and, well, I'm sure you can understand the rest, your
honor. What they cannot fabricate is papers from the banks itself, showing millions of dollars
behind hidden away in these foreign banks." Taehyung said bluntly. The judge got papers, and
then rose his eyebrow at Mr. Adams judgingly. Mr. Adams stayed quiet.

Just like that, they moved onto the questioning. Right before it, Jeongguk saw the client muttering
at Mr. Adams, saying more abusive things about Kim Taehyung. Jeongguk only listened. The
questioning of witnesses began. The client, Mr. George, was put on the stand. He swore by oath, to
tell the truth and nothing but the truth.

Taehyung walked up to him, hands in his pockets, looking more relaxed. Jeongguk felt himself get
a little annoyed by how careless he looked.

"What did your grandfather do, Mr. George?" Taehyung asked, slow.

"He had a farm."

"A big farm?" Taehyung asked, raising his eyebrow.

"A normal sized farm."

"Irrelevant, your honor." Mr. Adams grumbled. The judge raised his hand up, letting Taehyung
continue.

"I assume your grandfather's farm had little to no impact to your current wealth," Taehyung said,
sharp-spoken. Mr. George hesitated. Taehyung continued. "What did your father do?"

"Mr. Kim, please ask questions relevant to the subject at hand." The judge said.

"My father worked at a factory."

"So no inherent family wealth, I see. You've done quite well for yourself, Mr. George. Earned all
this money on your own terms. Now, let me get this right- your money that was in the foreign
banks wasn't inheritance, but rather, your own money? But not obtained from your work, but
someplace else? And it wasn't illegal?"

Mr. George stilled. Taehyung smirked.

"Now that isn't the only crime you've been committing, is it, Mr. George?" Taehyung said in a
hushed voice. The jury leaned in curiously. Jeongguk tilted his head.

"Objection, your honor. Leading." Mr. Adams snapped. The judge put his hand up, shutting him up
once more.

"At this moment, I would like to read a letter- sent by Mr. George to his dear friend at the Swiss
Bank. Mr. Thomas Bernard." Taehyung spoke snarkily, and then picked a piece of paper up from
his table. A copy of the same paper was given to the judge.

"Let the jury know that these words were written by Mr. George himself," Taehyung said, and then
clicked his tongue and continued. "Dear Tommy," Taehyung began, and then smirked, smug
fucking smirk. "I haven't seen you for a week too long. Your eyes remind me of emerald jewels,
your smile of heavens gates. I wish to run my tongue down your hip as I did the night when we-"
"T-This is not relevant t-to the-" Mr. George began, eyes wide, petrified.

Taehyung put his hand up. "The night when we made love under the stars of the sky, ah, how
poetic." Taehyung tsked, folding the paper up in his hands. "Isn't it such a shame, your honor, that
this man isn't only illegally laundering money, but also performing acts of homosexuality."

Jeongguk froze, very much froze on his seat, watching as Taehyung continued with a cocky smirk.
"Which, by the laws of England, are illegal, Mr. George," Taehyung said, and then put his hands in
his pockets again, flicking the letter carelessly to the table.

"D-don't do this." Mr. George whispered silently, so only Taehyung could hear. Jeongguk could
see. "Please. I-I did. I did illegally put the money in the banks but please, don't discuss my affairs-
"

Taehyung smirked. "I rest my case." Taehyung said, turning back around and walking towards his
seat. The judge scoffed.

"Alright then. Mr. George, you will face 8 years in prison for money laundering, and 2 more years
for acts of homosexuality. You will also receive mental psychiatry from doctors to treat
homosexuality."

Taehyung ignored all of those words, just walking to leave the courtroom. Jeongguk felt something
inside of him brew, a wave of anger, a resentment, a fear. Mr. Adams looked overly angry at
Taehyung and his client going to jail. Jeongguk got up from his seat and walked out of the
courtroom.

He walked into a washroom, and saw Taehyung there, leaning over a sink, hand against his face.
"You fucking asshole." Jeongguk breathed out, eyes wide.

"You weren't meant to be there," Taehyung said, low.

"I was. You are inhumane," Jeongguk growled, walking closer to him. Taehyung turned his head,
looking at Jeongguk. "Absolutely sick. You had enough goddamn evidence to put him behind bars.
You didn't need to bring up his- his indulgences,"

"I was doing my job," Taehyung said plainly, standing up properly and trying to walk out.
Jeongguk grabbed his arm.

"Is that what it is, now?" Jeongguk laughed. "You're just 'doing your job'? You're just 'being a good
husband'? Is that it, Taehyung?" Jeongguk said grimly. Taehyung turned around, blank, chest
rising. "What happened to your fucking morals? Your beliefs? Your so-called 'I hate being a
lawyer' and- and your fucking speeches on whats truly a virtue and a vice and-"

"I was wrong, Jeongguk!" Taehyung shouted, and Jeongguk flinched at his sudden rise of voice,
looking at the blonde haired man with widened eyes. "I was fucking wrong about everything, is
that what you want to hear?"

Jeongguk looked at him in disbelief. "I-I thought I knew you. I thought you-you knew you."
Jeongguk breathed out, shoulders falling, his big eyes crumbling, looking disheartened. "Just-
come back to me, Taehyung," Jeongguk whispered, walking closer to him.

Taehyung stayed still. Jeongguk put his hands on his suit jacket. "This doesn't have to happen. You
know it doesn't. We can work it out."

"Jeongguk," Taehyung let out.

"You said you'd come back after going to the doctor's." Jeongguk squeaked, weakly. "It's been t-
three weeks or so since I last saw you, T-Taehyung," Jeongguk looked up at him. "I love you.
Come back to me."

"I can't," Taehyung said. Jeongguk closed his eyes. "I thought- I thought I was a man who could be
above it all. Who could be s-so- so proud of his wrongdoings, his vices. I could grasp something
so wrong and see the beauty in it." Taehyung said faintly. Jeongguk felt his hands tightening on
Taehyung's jacket. "I was w-wrong,"

"Don't give up." Jeongguk shook his head. "Don't. You've made me a man who can be proud of his
wrongdoings. Don't take so many s-steps back now, T-Taehyungie." Jeongguk bit his lip, looking
up at him. His eyes gleamed with tears. "What h-happened to you?"

"It wasn't love," Taehyung said, one hand cradling Jeongguk's face now, looking into his eyes. He
looked soulless. "We were sick in the head."

"Taehyung," Jeongguk let out in disbelief, eyes widening. "Don't. Don't d-do this-"

"I have to go," Taehyung said, looking away from him. "Veronica, she's- she's been puking more
these days. More nauseatic." Taehyung said. Jeongguk didn't want to know that. Jeongguk saw the
look on his face. He looked so unlike himself. Where was the charming, proud, confident man he
fell in love with?

Jeongguk held onto him. "Taehyung," Jeongguk said gently, stepping closer to him. "She-
she hurt you, Taehyung," Jeongguk said. Taehyung looked at him, faltering. "She b-broke you
down, don't you remember? You cried to me. I helped you. Don't- d-don't you remember?"

Taehyung moved away from him forcefully and walked out of the restroom, slamming the door
behind him, making the whole room shake around Jeongguk. Jeongguk looked at himself in the
mirror and brought his fingers up to feel the small diamond on his neck. He inhaled sharply, trying
not to cry, not again, not again.

"It's been more than a month," Jeongguk heard, sitting on his bed. "Couldn't you call just once?"

"I'm sorry," Jeongguk said flatly to Rosie, who was on the other line. "Are you coming back?"

"Of course I'm coming back. S-soon, I presume. But not now. Um, my sister's had twins. They're so
lovely, Jeongguk. A girl and a boy. The boy's looking a little sickly, but the doctors say he'll be
fine. The girl is beautiful, I tell you. A full head of hair. She's got the most beautiful little laugh. I
love taking care of the- hello?"

Jeongguk lay against the wall, phone not held against his ear, rather swinging from the wire it held
onto. Jeongguk heard Rosie's muffled voice from the phone. "Hello? Jeongguk, are you there?"

Jeongguk picked the telephone back up. "I'm here," Jeongguk whispered. "Just be back whenever
you like, don't rush. I'm absolutely fine. Goodnight." Jeongguk said, and then hung the call. He
leaned against the wall, closing his eyes.
"Don't you ever look at the moon and wish you could be on it?" Taehyung asked, one arm wrapped
tightly around Jeongguk's waist, looking at the moon hung high in the sky.

"You want to live on the moon, Taehyungie?" Jeongguk giggled, sitting on the man's lap. Taehyung
looked at Jeongguk.

"I'd love to. I imagine it's beautiful up there. Stark white, no one else. It could be just us."
Taehyung said, and then kissed Jeongguk's cheek. Jeongguk blushed and lay his head on
Taehyung's shoulder.

"I'll get the moon for you, Jeongguk," Taehyung said, hand making circles on his lower back. "But
she'd get jealous, the moon. Your beauty lies far beyond hers does."

"Oh hush, Shakespeare," Jeongguk said, hitting his chest. Taehyung laughed at Jeongguk's words
and then kissed Jeongguk on the mouth. Jeongguk kissed back, running a hand through his golden
hair.

Jeongguk blinked and felt a tear go down his eye. It was so beautiful with Taehyung. Why did it
have to end?

Jeongguk sniffled and walked to the door. It was 9 pm at night. He wanted to leave his home, go
for a walk. Jeongguk saw his wedding band sitting idly at the kitchen counter, and ignored it.
Jeongguk walked out of his house, mind cluttered.

Jeongguk just wanted to kiss him once more.

He walked down the road, seeing the lights of nearby shops still open, running. Jeongguk walked
down the pavement, his muscles hurting, his mind hurting, his heart hurting. He wishes someone
could give him morphine to take the pain away, but he regarded his pain was far too much to be
fixed with a simple white pill.

Jeongguk turned a corner and froze.

Taehyung stood there, looking into a shop. It was a shop for children's things. He was looking at
strollers for babies. He had a small smile on his face. He held a brown paper bag with another
hand, presumably of medicine for Veronica. Jeongguk looked at him.

Jeongguk walked up to him. "I reckon the red one would look rather nice in your house," Jeongguk
said, softly.

Taehyung turned his head to look at Jeongguk. "Oh," Taehyung let out upon seeing him. Taehyung
turned back and hummed. "I guess it would."

"Which one do you like?" Jeongguk asked. Taehyung looked at him hesitantly, and then back at
the shop.

"Pink one with the flowers." Taehyung murmured. "If we had a baby girl."

"You want a girl?" Jeongguk asked. Taehyung nodded. Jeongguk looked at him for a few more
seconds. "I hope you have one."

Jeongguk turned around to walk away but then heard some words. "You still wearing the necklace,
Gguk."

Jeongguk stilled. He let out a breath and then felt his hand go up to fondle the necklace again. "I-I
like it. It reminds me of you."

Taehyung didn't respond to that. "You were drunk that day when I came over. You were in a
skirt."

"I know," Jeongguk said, looking down. "I- um- I bought in some time ago. It brought me an odd
sense of comfort."

Taehyugn didn't say anything, continued looking at the shop. Jeongguk turned to look at him. "You
told me that day," Taehyung said. "You told me you wish Veronica got sick, and I never found
anyone again."

Jeongguk's stomach contorted uneasily. "You know, Gguk. I didn't think," Taehyung said, his
words hushed. "I n-never do. I don't think before doing such sort of spontaneous things. I d-don't
think of the aftermath."

"Don't speak such words." Jeongguk shook his head, looking down at the pavement.

"I didn't think you'd fall in love with me. I didn't think you'd be more than just sex. But you
became more than just," Taehyung sucked in a sharp breath. "More than just sex."

"But," Taehyng looked at him, and eyes were wet with tears, glittering in the moonlight. "There are
some things you can't succumb to."

Jeongguk felt a flash of indignation in his mind. "Leave her, Taehyung."

"You're being ludicrous," Taehyung said, taking a step away from him, sniffling, the tip of his nose
red, holding back tears. "She's my wife."

"You don't love her." Jeongguk shook his head. "You don't. A child won't fix your marriage,"

"Jeongguk-" Taehyung began. Jeongguk pushed. "You'll only hurt the child."

"I'll hurt the child more by letting it be alone, without a father or a mother." Taehyung gritted.
"Plus, Veronica's trying to change. She's e-even going to therapy-"

"You don't love her, Taehyung," Jeongguk said, strained. "Why do you t-think you can flourish in
your love with her? Y-you'll never be happy, you'll never-"

"I won't!" Taehyung snapped, looking at him. "May-maybe I'll never be happy, Jeongguk, but what
the fuck do you want me to do about it? Do you want me to leave her? Come to you? Is that what
you want?"

Jeongguk looked at him hesitantly. "It's illegal, Jeongguk," Taehyung said in a hushed voice,
walking closer to him. "We can't, we just can't be together." Jeongguk's eyes formed tears. "We'll
get thrown into asylums and locked up in prison. We cannot, for the love of god, be together."

Jeongguk stepped closer to him. He looked down. "I don't care," Jeongguk breathed out weakly. "I-
I'm in love with you. I want to spend eternity with you. I l-long for you, every night." Jeongguk
sounded so desperate.

Taehyung felt his anger subdue upon hearing Jeongguk's chaste words, how his eyes looked like
broken glass, how his words cut Taehyung like a knife, how much effect the boy had on
Taehyung.

"Darling," Taehyung whispered, letting his anger go. Jeongguk kept looking down, tears in his
eyes. "This world. It isn't meant for people like you and me. It isn't meant for us to love. It isn't-"
Taehyung put his hand on Jeongguk's chin, bringing it up, seeing tears which matched his own.
"We were never meant to love."

"T-that's not fair." Jeongguk shook his head, sounding like a child. "I-I've never loved before. I
only l-l-loved you. I don't c-care what the world wants."

"We can't ignore it," Taehyung said, voice hoarse. "The world is cruel, cruel, so cruel, little angel,"
Taehyung whispered. "Two men, two women, they can never love. They c-can't."

"I-It's not fair." Jeongguk cried out, tears rolling down his face. He looked up at Taehyung. "You
have your wife who you're having a child with. Y-years later, you'll forget about me. You'll have
your nice b-big house and you'll have your daughter and your son. You'll grow old with a family,
with people you love, and the world won't say a thing,"

Taehyung looked at Jeongguk weakly. Jeongguk put his hand on Taehyung's, which was on his
cheek. "D-don't-" Jeongguk breathed deeply. "Don't I d-deserve somebody to love?"

"You do," Taehyung whispered, reaching forward, his own instincts failing him, leading him to
touch Jeongguk as he always did. "You deserve more love than anyone I know."

Jeongguk looked at him. "I-I want you." Jeongguk squeaked. "I want y-you to love me back."

"I can't." Taehyung looked at his big eyes. "You know I-I can't. We're men. In t-this world, we
have to take care of our wives, of our homes, of our children,"

Jeongguk put their foreheads together. "I d-don't want to be a man," Jeongguk whispered.
Taehyung stilled, reaching his hands to grip his waist.

They were silent for a few seconds. The sky rumbled lowly as if speaking inherently from the
world's wishes, disobeying of the love Jeongguk felt for the older man. Jeongguk looked up at
him.

"Kiss me, one l-last time, please," Jeongguk asked, gripping his shirt.

"Jeongguk," Taehyung said, shaking his head. Jeongguk reached up and pressed their lips together,
fingers running through Taehyung's blonde hair. Taehyung stayed still while Jeongguk kissed him.
Thankfully, there was no one else in sight. No one else around them. No one-

"Taehyung?" A voice came. Taehyung pushed Jeongguk away and looked up, and went pale when
he saw Veronica.

"What's- what're you doing, Veronica? You shouldn't have come out. I was getting you the
medicine, love-" Taehyung began. Veronica looked at Jeongguk, in disbelief. It wasn't anger,
unlike last time, but just shock.

"I came looking for you, you-you took too long..." Veronica said, and Taehyung walked away from
Jeongguk, grabbing Veronica's hand. "Why were you- k-kissing-?"
"He kissed me. I'm sorry. Don't worry about it, Veronica, let's just-" Taehyung said quickly.
Veronica turned her head to look at Jeongguk, who was looking down at the floor, in humiliation if
his own actions, hand clasped against his mouth, shoulders shaking. He was sobbing.

Veronica stopped. "Is he alright?"

Taehyung turned for a second, and then back to her. "He's fine. Let's go home."

Veronica and him walked back in the pale night, the breeze which was meant to be comforting
feeling ice cold. "He ran into me there. I didn't- I didn't plan on meeting-"

"Were you crying?" Veronica asked softly. Taehyung looked at her. His eyes were slightly red and
he was sniffling. Taehyung chuckled out forcefully.

"W-what? No, love, relax. How was the therapy session today? Was the therapist any good? You
are paying him a lot of-"

"He's in love with you, isn't he?" Veronica let out faintly. Her words caught Taehyung to stop in
his steps, his hand falling limp on Veronica's back, his eyes going blank.

He looked front. "Yes," Taehyung said.

Veronica looked at him. Taehyung went up to the steps of the house, as they had arrived back
home. He walked into the house. Veronica followed. "How long?"

"I don't know," Taehyung said, taking his coat off. He walked to the kitchen to get a glass of
whiskey. Veronica stopped in the middle of the living room.

"When did he tell you?" Veronica asked. "Was it before you left him?"

Taehyung poured a little whiskey into a glass, and then up at her. "It doesn't matter. What matters,
is that I left him-"

"Were you in love with him as well?" Veronica asked, her eyes curious, stance cautious, standing
still.

Taehyung paused for a second, and then grabbed the glass of whiskey and tipped it down his
throat. He slammed the glass back down and walked out of the kitchen.

"Did you talk to the therapist, my love?" Taehyung asked, humming. "Did you tell her about how
you hurt me? Hit me? Called me a useless piece of shit? Fucked me?"

"Taehyung," Veronica breathed out, eyes wide. "You- you know I'm sorry for all I've done. I'm t-
trying to change, you know I am. I should've never hurt you, n-never laid a single finger on- on
you, you've d-done nothing but help-"

"Right. So you haven't talked to the therapist about it, have you?" Taehyung asked, closer. "He
doesn't know you used to torment your husband, then?"

"No, no, we've only had one session so far," Veronica said, sniffling.

"Talked about yourself the whole time? Hm? Was that it?" Taehyung growled lowly.

"No, Taehyung, we spoke about how my father used to beat the fucking crap out of my mother and
me when we were younger," Veronica shouted. She looked up, eyes watering. "But I'm s-sure we'll
get to you soon." She spoke faintly and then walked out of the living room and up the stairs to her
 bedroom.

Taehyung's shoulders fell, hand running through his hair. Were you in love with him as well?

Taehyung hadn't thought about it.

**

Chapter End Notes

i am HIGHLY aware of jungkook's desperation and pining. but just think about the
fact that this is in the 50s, and he's never been in love before, and all that. im not trying
to promote toxic relationships or justify veronica's actions in ANY way.
 Chapter 22
Chapter Notes

oh my goodness thank u for all the kind words ): im overwhelmed im so glad u guys
like this fic !!! :D

**

Days passed by as the sun washed down onto the grained earth every night and returned each
morning. For everyone, time went on, their lives went on, their nights went on.

Jeongguk found himself at a sudden stop. The past months had been meadows of freshly cut grass
and blooming flowers, and now it was withering trees and dead leaves on the ground- and all he
could do was cry.

Pathetic, he thought to himself. He was pathetic. Pathetic, running after a man who never loved
him. Pathetic, running after a man who was married. Pathetic, running after a man whose wife was
pregnant. Pathetic, being a man who was married. Pathetic, being a man.

Jeongguk peered into the road in front of him. It looked like an abyss to nowhere. Why was he
here?

Jeongguk saw a few men walking past him, upholding an image, a tier to society, and letting it
crumble when they faded between cracks of walls and cement. Jeongguk followed, looking for
bliss.

It's like all his life he'd been empty. He'd been unknowing of himself, at a constant state of
confusion. Nothing ever felt right. Nothing ever felt quite satisfactory. It felt as if his entire life,
he'd been living a lie. Until, until he met with the blazing fire.

The blazing fire which enveloped him with warmth in the coldest days, showed him light and made
him recognize and accept his own shadow- that same fire now burnt his skin and left him in
ashes.

But Jeongguk could never stop reaching for that warmth, that fire, that security, that happiness.

Jeongguk walked forward, down the pathway, and then stopped short in his steps. He saw the
small door, behind it which lay a world unknown to the society of London. Jeongguk stepped
towards it. The man standing in front of the door, guarding it, looked at him with speculation.

"Why're you here?" The man asked, interrogatingly.

"I-I wish to go inside. I didn't think I had to bring identification of sorts." Jeongguk said softly.
The man eyed him for a few seconds and then opened the door. "Don't cause trouble."

"Understood, sir." Jeongguk nodded and then walked into the large hallway. A dark, empty
hallway. His pace increased, until he reached the door and pushed it open, and felt a breath leave
his lips.

Lively music filled the room, laughter and dancing overcame it. Smoke leaving cigars huddled to
the ceiling, and Jeongguk made his way through the smoke, a little tinge of happiness in his heart
upon seeing all these men, laughing with one another, open, smiling. Some kissed, some hugged,
some just basked in each other's company.

Jeongguk reached the bar. The bartender looked at him and then grinned. "I remember you. You
were with that handsome blonde man, weren't you?"

"Yes sir," Jeongguk said faintly. The man smiled. "Would you like something to drink?" Jeongguk
nodded at the question.

"W-whatever you serve here. I'm not too sure-" Jeongguk began, but the man handed him a
cocktail. Jeongguk gave him a small smile and turned around, seeing two boys sitting around a
small table, talking to each other. They looked too young, about 16.

"Ah, they're kids." The bartender said, leaning against the bar table. "We don't allow children. But
the boys found the bar on their own, pleaded us to let them in. Couldn't say no to that. I reckon
they're in love, don't you?" The bartender chuckled.

Jeongguk looked at the boys. One was smaller, wide-eyed, apprehensive in his nature, shy. He had
tousled light brown hair. The other boy was taller, black-haired, smiling at him and holding his
hand. The black haired one whispered things to the smaller, soft, and the smaller boy smiled
gingerly and blushed.

"Young love," Jeongguk let out, eyes twinkling. "What a beautiful thing," Jeongguk whispered, a
husk in his tone which could only resemble envy. Envy that he never got to have such a beautiful
thing, and he probably never will.

"Doubt it. They'll probably get married soon. Forget about each other. Have children. Meet in 20
years and pretend they were never in love. That's just how life is for us." The bartender murmured,
and Jeongguk stilled.

"Live, tonight! Champagne Gloss!" A man announced loudly, and the lights dimmed and everyone
quietened. The spotlight fell on the stage.

Jeongguk felt entranced as Yoongi, Jeongguk remembers, walked onto the stage, in a signature
black short dress, hair short and black as well, makeup sharp, eyes overly painted on. He moved in
a sensual way, but it was almost mockingly portraying women in cinema. Jeongguk laughed.

Yoongi mouthed along to the words of the song, and Jeongguk noticed how his red lips didn't
curve to a smile even once, which came off as intimidating. He lipsynced the whole song,
emotional and gripping onto the pole in the middle, even swinging around it lightly, making the
audience cheer.

In the end, the song came to a finish, and Yoongi smiled to the audience. Jeongguk saw in his eyes.
He loved what he did.

Yoongi then turned around and walked off stage while the audience clapped. Jeongguk, with his
drink in his hand, walked behind the stage to find him. Jeongguk found his changing room as he
had last time. He knocked on the door.

"I'm not in the mood for meeting anyone. Go away." Yoongi said sternly in his deeper, low voice.
Jeongguk's hands curled to a fist hesitantly.

"It's m-me, um- Jeongguk. That boy you met with Taehyung?" Jeongguk tried, heart racing,
nervous. There were a few seconds of pause, and then the door swung open.

"Ah, it's you." Yoongi chuckled. His hair was gone, wig lying on the table nearby, and his natural
black hair was curled and slightly damp against his forehead instead. "I remember you, of course."

"That's splendid. I-I just came to meet you I'm- I'm sorry if this was out of the blue. I just didn't
know-" Jeongguk began, and Yoongi frowned.

"Are you alright?" Yoongi asked, and then grabbed Jeongguk by the elbow and brought him inside
the room. Yoongi closed the door behind him. Jeongguk stood there for a few seconds and shook
his head.

"I-it's Taehyung. He broke things off with me. His wife's pregnant." Jeongguk said scarcely. He
hadn't said those words aloud to anyone but himself.

"He was married?" Yoongi asked, eyes going wide. "Gosh. That would've been good to know
before I snogged him in the bathroom two years ago," Yoongi scoffed.

Jeongguk's eyes were big. "Y-you what?"

"I apologize, that wasn't appropriate. Sit down." Yoongi said, and Jeongguk nodded and saw a little
brown sofa on the side. He sat down, and Yoongi walked up to him and sat down beside him. "Tell
me what happened,"

"Taehyung. We were together for three months. Yeah, we were married when we met, but-"
Jeongguk began, but Yoongi chuckled.

"You couldn't help it. You were never in love with your wife. You found him alluring." Yoongi
said factually. "What happened after?"

Jeongguk looked a bit confused but continued nonetheless. "At the beginning, it was just for sex.
Taehyung told me, he just wanted it for sex. I agreed to it at first but-but I-"

"You fell in love." Yoongi sighed, leaning against the couch. Jeongguk looked at him. "H-how did
you know?"

"We've all been there, Jeongguk." Yoongi laughed, and Jeongguk felt even more puzzled. Yoongi
sat up and looked at him, smiling softly. "Oh, sweet thing. Let me tell you something," Yoongi said
softly, putting his hand on Jeongguk's knee.

"You see all those men in there?" Yoongi said, gesturing to outside the room, where noises of
laughter and chatter came. "I can promise you, almost every single one of them has fallen in love
with a man they simply cannot have."

Jeongguk froze. "W-why?" Jeongguk parched.

"There's no reason. Love is... what it is. It's natural. Your story, of being married, yet falling for
another married man, and then having sex, and hiding from your wives- everyone's done that!"
Yoongi chuckled. "That's just how it is for us."
Jeongguk shook his head. "You don't u-understand. Taehyung- he- he said he felt that for me as
well." Jeongguk explained, looking at him closely. "Taehyung told me he wanted me for more than
just sex. He- he said he was falling for me."

Yoongi eyebrows furrowed. Jeongguk looked down, retracting. "He took me to France. He made
love to me. He cried when I wanted to leave for my wife. He-" Jeongguk felt tears growing in his
eyes and tried his hardest to take them back, to not cry in front of someone he didn't know all that
well.

"It's alright," Yoongi whispered, patting his knee. "You can cry. I understand."

Jeongguk opened his eyes and his vision blurred. "I-I took care of him." Jeongguk squeaked,
playing with his fingers. "H-he used to get anxious, and c-call me up at dawn. I r-reassured him. He
u-used to call me beautiful, his- his darling. H-he gave me this." Jeongguk sniffled, holding the
diamond of his necklace between his fingertips.

"Jeongguk," Yoongi said in the softest of voice. Jeongguk looked at him, eyes full of tears. "I'm
sorry, sweetheart. Come here." Yoongi said gently, and Jeongguk was unsure for a second, but then
Yoongi grabbed him and tugged him to himself, sitting Jeongguk down on his lap.

"N-no, it-it's fine, I'll-" Jeongguk began, but then felt Yoongi's arm go around him, and
whisper; "Shush, it's alright. It's alright, you can cry. You can let it out."

Jeongguk sank his teeth into his bottom lip and burst into tears, covering his face with his hands.
Yoongi made small circles on his back. Jeongguk continued crying into his hands.

"I-I'm sorry," Jeongguk said, shaking his head, cheeks damp with tear tracks. "I sh-shouldn't
burden you with-"

"Don't worry, sweetheart," Yoongi said, his voice sending tingles down Jeongguk's spine. "You're
alright. It hurts. I know how you feel. I've too fallen for men who've left me because they fear the
world around us."

Jeongguk looked at him, sniffling. Yoongi smiled up at him, and then pinched his cheek. "You
know, I think you'd make a beautiful woman."

Jeongguk bit his lip. "Y-you think so?" Jeongguk giggled. "Why of course. A little bit of makeup,
some nice hair, a nice skirt," Yoongi went on, and Jeongguk blushed. "You'd be beautiful."

"T-that doesn't sound... all that bad," Jeongguk whispered, and Yoongi chuckled and then nudged
Jeongguk to stand up. Jeongguk did so, and Yoongi put his hands on Jeongguk's waist and guided
him towards his own dressing table, sitting him down, making him face the mirror.

"Look at yourself," Yoongi whispered, looming behind Jeongguk, smiling, tender. "You're
beautiful, doll," Yoongi said, and Jeongguk blushed, eyes going sparkly. "Don't let some rotten
man tell you otherwise."

Jeongguk nodded, giving Yoongi a small smile through the mirror.

Jeongguk went there every night for the next week.

It made him feel lighter, better, proud. Jeongguk got to know everyone there much better. The
bartender, a delightfully lovely gay man named Mark. Jeongguk had bonded closer to Yoongi,
watching all his performances and then talking to him in his green room afterward.

On an early Saturday evening, Jeongguk was finished with work and his revision for law school-
and like every day for the past week, ready to go to the secretive club to spend the rest of the day.
Jeongguk wore a white top and trousers, wanting to look plain as usual. He couldn't help but dab
on the slightest bit of rouge on his cheeks, however.

Jeongguk walked out of his house, humming a song Yoongi was performing the night before under
his breath. Jeongguk walked down the pavement, a skip in his step. Jeongguk continued walking
down the busy shopping street. The club was quite far away, but Jeongguk didn't mind the long
walk.

While walking down the aisles of stores and such, he saw a beautiful pink dress on a mannequin.
He eyed it with a bitten lip, and then shook his head gently and continued walking. But when he
turned, he felt his body stop.

It was as if fate was making Taehyung appear in every corner, wasn't it?

Taehyung stood there, looking into a store's window. Except for this time, Veronica was with him.
Jeongguk could see them, they couldn't see him. He could make out those wide shoulders and
blonde hair from a mile away.

It was a children's boutique, one of those expensive ones which sold little frilly dresses and shirt
and trousers for babies. Taehyung pointed at the frilly dresses, and Jeongguk saw as Veronica
smacked his shoulder lightly.

Jeongguk tensed when he saw Taehyung laugh and wrap his arms around her waist. She tipped her
head back and laughed as Taehyung dragged her towards the store. She stopped him halfway and
glared up at him. He pouted a bit and then whispered something to her. She smiled gingerly and
reached up to peck his lips. She said something back and went into the store alone.

Jeongguk felt his stomach wracking, his heart squeezing itself in the entirety of it. Why did he keep
watching? Why couldn't he ever look away?

But, to his surprise, the moment Veronica went into the store, Taehyung's whole posture fell, and
he turned around, facing the other way from the store. He took out a cigarette, lighting it with a
needy speed Jeongguk had never noticed before. He looked expressionless, flat, the joyous one he
had with Veronica now gone.

Jeongguk then realized this was the shopping place where Taehyung kissed him so chastely for the
first time. At the time, Jeongguk thought he was horrid, mad, a lunatic. Oh, how everything's
changed.

Jeongguk ignored him, went back on his way.

Jeongguk reached the bar, and this time the man with the glasses at the front let him in with a
smile. Jeongguk walked into the dimly lit wooden paneled bar and saw Yoongi sitting by the bar.
Jeongguk rushed over to him.

"Yoongi," Jeongguk greeted, and the man looked up. Today, Yoongi had no makeup on, no
womanly clothes, nothing of the sort. He wore a coat, trousers, a shirt, and his hair was his natural
black, soft hair. "You're yourself today."

"I'm always myself, doll. Sometimes I just... play dress up." Yoongi winked, grinning. "But yes, I
don't perform tonight. We have another queen performing on the stage tonight."

"Really?" Jeongguk asked, smiling. "Are there many queens around here? Who's tonight?"

"You'll find out. Come with me to my dressing room, sweetheart. I need to get my take off my coat,
it's rather heated in here." Yoongi chuckled, getting up. Jeongguk followed, nodding.

Jeongguk walked into his dressing room. Yoongi went into the other side to keep his coat, and then
the man who owned the club came to discuss something with Yoongi, so Yoongi stepped outside
momentarily. Jeongguk was alone in the room.

Jeongguk hummed to himself, spinning around, looking at the small dressing room. It had white
chipped walls, carpeted floors, and makeup spilled over the dressing table. Jeongguk walked up to
to the table. He had no clue there were so many different things for makeup.

Jeongguk looked at himself in the mirror. You're beautiful, my baby- Jeongguk flinched upon that
voice reoccurring in his head, a deep voice belonging to Taehyung.

Jeongguk sat down on Yoongi's chair and saw some clip-on pearl earrings. Jeongguk smiled to
himself, clipping them onto his earlobes. He giggled, shaking his head a bit from side to side,
seeing the pearls dangling. Jeongguk then grabbed an odd metallic thing.

Jeongguk reached it up to his eyelashes and then wondered to himself. Were these for his
eyebrows? Or-

"It's for your eyelashes, love," Yoongi said suddenly, and Jeongguk dropped the eyelash curler in
an instant, turning his head. He gulped.

"O-oh. I'm sorry. I-I shouldn't have gone through your things. I was just-" Jeongguk began
frantically, but Yoongi walked up to the boy and turned him to face the mirror. Yoongi smiled.

"Look how gorgeous you look with those earrings," Yoongi tsked. "I can only imagine what you'd
look like in more. A necklace, makeup, a beautiful dress-"

"W-what are you-" Jeongguk began, going red. "No. I-I don't have any sort of desire to look like
how you do. I think it's marvelous what you do but-but I can't- I-" Jeongguk began, and then
Yoongi lifted his chin up.

"Doll," Yoongi whispered, and Jeongguk gulped. "If you didn't want to, then you wouldn't be
looking so yearningly every time,"

Jeongguk's mouth opened, but no words came out. He looked down, playing with his fingers. "I-
It'd be odd."

"No, it wouldn't. Who would judge you here?" Yoongi asked.

Jeongguk hesitated for a few seconds and then urged up once more. "I-I wouldn't fit into your clo-
"

"You would. Your waist is smaller than mine, love." Yoongi snickered, and Jeongguk looked up at
him.
"Yoongi, I-I don't know about-" Jeongguk began, but then Yoongi tsked, standing up properly.

"Love, you can say no if you want. But I know you want it, you know you want it. I'll make you
look beautiful, you know I will." Yoongi whispered, patting his cheek.

Jeongguk's heart thudded against his chest for a long time, but then he nodded. "A-alright." He
whispered, and a small speckled smile spread across his face. "I-I want you to."

"There's my girl," Yoongi said with a smirk, turning Jeongguk around to face the mirror. Jeongguk
giggled.

No, no Jeongguk didn't want to be a woman. He didn't want to be Rosie, he wanted to be like Rosie.
He wanted to be beautiful, he wanted to wear dresses and makeup and maybe even a wig- but he
was still a man. That wouldn't go away. He'd just be a beautiful, dolled up man. He doesn't mind
that.

Yoongi began. He did Jeongguk's makeup. Yoongi did something odd to his eyebrows and then
drew on thinner ones. Jeongguk looked odd. Yoongi put some sort of lighter compact all over his
skin, and then darker on his cheekbones and jawline and nose. Yoongi did his eye makeup, a pretty
pink and yellow. Yoongi gave him bold, pink lip color, and finally, a little beauty spot on his
cheek.

He then got short, curled black hair and somehow placed it onto Jeongguk's head. Jeongguk had his
eyes widened at his reflection now. Jeongguk looked... beautiful. Not that he's not always beautiful,
but in a different way. He enjoyed it immensely.

Yoongi found a pink poodle dress. Jeongguk shook his head vehemently, but Yoongi kept coaxing
him, and Jeongguk finally gave in, biting his lip because he actually really wanted to wear it. So he
did.

Jeongguk looked at himself in the mirror. He had long, curled black hair, falling till his shoulders.
His eyes looked bigger than usual, the makeup making them look rounder. He looked womanly,
and the dress was.... something else. Jeongguk loved it so fucking much. He loved the way it
tightened around his waist and then flared around. He loved how it lifted and twirled when he spun
around. He loved how it made him look.

"Fucking hell," Yoongi grunted, looking at Jeongguk. "You look far more beautiful than me. What
have I done."

"Thank you," Jeongguk giggled, his cheeks rosy pink. "I-I find myself rather eliciting."

"Eliciting? You look like a real woman! I really outdid myself," Yoongi tsked, folding his arms.
"It's not my fault you've got such a baby's face."

Yoongi took a camera and clicked some pictures of Jeongguk, to which the boy giggled shyly and
hid his face. Afterward, Yoongi clutched his wrist.

"Now now, you need a name." Yoongi tutted, and then hummed, stroking his chin. "What could it
be... perhaps something more dainty. Here's what I think- Nicola Champagne."

"Why's my last name have to be Champagne?" Jeongguk frowned. Yoongi scoffed. "Because I am
your mother, Jeongguk. Now think. I'm thinking- Cecilia Cham-"

"Moonflower," Jeongguk said suddenly, looking at himself in the mirror. He still wore his
diamond necklace and fondled it with his fingers. Jeongguk let out a soft smile. "I-I want to be
named Moonflower."

"Moonflower? That's... different. Elegant, too. I guess it's a little long, but you could be one of
those queens with a singular name! Moonflower it is," Yoongi clapped his hands together, and
Jeongguk smiled looking at him.

"Now, Moonflower. You can't keep the audience waiting, can you?" Yoongi asked, and Jeongguk
stilled. His eyes blew up.

"What??" Jeongguk yelped, stepping away. "I-I can't- I don't know anything! I can't perform,
Yoongi!"

"Why not? It'll be nice. You'll be different. You'll-" Yoongi began, but Jeongguk shook his head,
turning away.

"N-no, please. I c-can't let anyone see me like t-this. I'm sorry. I'm not ready for it- I-I doubt I'll
ever be." Jeongguk squeaked fearfully. Yoongi paused.

"O-oh. That's- that's alright, sweetheart. I won't force you. That's alright. You can just be my pretty
thing." Yoongi said, and Jeongguk sighed, his anxious thoughts washing away. Yoongi walked
over to Jeongguk and kissed his forehead. "Moonflower."

"That's me," Jeongguk whispered back, and then looked at his reflection once more. Moonflower.

5 days later, Jeongguk found himself at peace.

Maybe there was a chance to move on and find happiness in his life.

He thought he'd be alright. He thought, the week and the one before, everything had been going so
beautifully, so splendidly, so smoothly, so shapely, because Taehyung wasn't there.

In fact, Taehyung going away helped Jeongguk.

Jeongguk was at his desk in the law firm, doodling himself in his dress and black rolled up hair on
a little piece of paper. Moonflower, he wrote above it. Jeongguk smiled at his drawing and then felt
a thump on his desk.

"Meeting with Mr. Adams."

"He's at lunch right now, sir-" Jeongguk began, bringing his head up. The moment he did, his
shoulders sank. "Taehyung?"

Taehyung looked at him, dressed luxuriously in a maroon suit, blonde hair slicked back. Taehyung
looked away. "I'm here to meet Mr. Adams. The woman downstairs said I had to get through his
assistant first."
Jeongguk looked away. "Well then. Mr. Adams is at lunch." Jeongguk humphed, legs and arms
crossed. Taehyung rose his eyebrow. He scoffed.

"I have a very busy schedule, Jeongguk. I took out time out of my own day to be here, to- to meet
Mr. Adams for the settlement. So if you could just be professional for a minute and tell Mr. Adams
to finish his goddamn lunch and meet me here." Taehyung snapped.

Jeongguk paused and looked at him. Jeongguk ducked his head down, looking through some
papers. Jeongguk saw the schedule. "Your name isn't written here anywhere."

Taehyung looked irked, and then eyed his thick watch clad to his wrist for a second, and then back
up at Jeongguk. "My assistant called last week for this."

Jeongguk nodded. "She-she said the meeting was set for next Thursday-"

"Why would it be for next Thursday when the settlement is supposed to be given in by tonight?"
Taehyung snapped, eyebrows furrowed, eyes darkened.

Jeongguk kept quiet for a few seconds, and then looked up. "You haven't gotten sleep."

Taehyung looked taken aback by this sudden statement but kept his posture very steady. "What?"

"You," Jeongguk said, looking up at him from where he was seated behind the desk. "You haven't
slept properly in a week or so, have you?" Jeongguk asked softly.

Taehyung was grounded for a few seconds, not speaking, no words leaving his mouth. Jeongguk
nodded. "Your hands are shaking, Taehyung."

"Jeongguk," Taehyung put his hands down, into his pocket. "Will you just call Mr. Adams for the
goddamn-"

"You're rude to everyone who works at a level beneath you." Jeongguk voiced, looking down.
"Don't talk to me in such a way. I don't appreciate it." Jeongguk said, stern. Maybe he'd been
around Yoongi too long.

Taehyung didn't know how to respond. Jeongguk looked back at him. "You've been taking your
medicine for anxiety again, haven't you? You could never sleep well after taking those, Taehyung.
Your hands always trembled after-"

"Jeongguk," Taehyung said lowly. "Stop talking."

"I reckon it's because of the pregnancy, isn't it?" Jeongguk asked, blunt. Felt a need in himself to
hurt Taehyung through his words. "Veronica shouldn't be taking much stress, gosh, no. That can't
be quite right for the baby. I assume you've been doing more work than usual, then. And, of
course, the fact that you don't really want the child at all is settling in, isn't it? Oh, and the guilt and
the regret you must have because you left me for her and the child and-"

"Shut the fuck up," Taehyung growled, and Jeongguk flinched at his voice. Jeongguk looked at
him timorously and then saw Taehyung's eyes wide, his expression weak.

"I don't-" Taehyung began shakily. "I don't regret leaving you."

"Of course you do," Jeongguk whispered, trying not to let Taehyung's words affect him. "You
regret every minute of it. You wish you never left me. You wish you could fuck me again. You
wish you never fucked Veronica and came inside of her-"
"Jeongguk," Taehyung looked aghast. "What's the matter with you?" Taehyung asked, strained.

Jeongguk got up from his seat, walking closer to Taehyung. "My matter," Jeongguk began softly.
"Is that you didn't think for a goddamn second before leaving me, as if I was nothing but dirt under
your shoe-"

"I was being realistic. If you can't handle the real world, then don't blame me for it." Taehyung
muttered and then turned to walk back out of the building. Jeongguk laughed, turning around.

"Realistic?" Jeongguk breathed out. "Taehyung, what happened to you?" Jeongguk asked.
Taehyung stopped in his steps.

"Weren't you the one that told me to chase my vices, make them my virtues? To grasp onto my
hopes and dreams and speak them into existence? Weren't you the one who started a fucking
relationship with a man?!" Jeongguk said, his words quiet, but cutting like a knife.

Taehyung faced Jeongguk with his back. He didn't say anything, but Jeongguk could tell what he
was thinking. So Jeongguk voiced it aloud. Jeongguk walked ahead of him to look at him and then
eyed his eyes, which were facing down. "Kim Taehyung- you are nothing but a failure of the man
you tried to be," Jeongguk whispered.

Taehyung tensed. "You're a liar, you're weak, you're pathetic, Taehyung," Jeongguk let out, his
own heart clenching at his words. "You created a facade. Pretended to be this confident, alluring,
outspoken young man when you are no different than every other man there is," Jeongguk said,
shaking his head.

Taehyung looked at him, and his eyes were full of tears. "I-I know." Taehyung let out, a weak
whisper.

"You know." Jeongguk nodded, his own eyes near to letting his love for the man flood out tears.
"Then you know what the truth is," Jeongguk added. "B-because, the truth is, Taehyung- that I was
wrong. I was wrong when I met you that day. What I said. That you'd be fine, and I'd never be. It-
it's really the other way around, isn't it?"

"I'll divorce Rosie. I'll find another man, one who's willing to love me and cherish me. I'll do what
I love. I'll move on," Jeongguk gritted. "But you?" Jeongguk chuckled weakly. "You, Taehyung?
You'll be stuck in a marriage with a woman you don't love, with a child you never wanted, still in
love with a man who you'll never have."

Taehyung let out a gasp of breath, and then Jeongguk saw the tears rolling down his face.
Taehyung walked past him, their shoulders nudging, and walked out of the building as quickly as
he could.

Jeongguk turned around to look at him, his own eyes gleaming with tears. Taehyung was shaking,
and Jeongguk knew the man might spiral into another anxious attack, with how vulnerable and
pained he looked from Jeongguk's words.

Because Jeongguk was right.

**
 Chapter 23
Chapter Notes

warning; homophobic slurs and in general lots of homophobia in this chapter, so please
skip some paras if required <3

**

It's that of nightmares.

When everything around you is falling, and falling, and falling and falling. Taehyung didn't know
where the ground ended and where the sky began, didn't know where his feet stood and where his
arms reached. His mind was dizzy, his throat was dry.

He knew only one thing at that time, at that place.

He stumbled into his own home, mind stagnant with thoughts he had pushed aside. Jeongguk. He
had pushed aside the thought of Jeongguk for so many weeks but he had come back, and he had
revealed every one of Taehyung's fears he hid away so well.

You're pathetic, Taehyung.

"Ah, Taehyung. You're back." A voice came, and he looked up barely to see Veronica, walking
down the steps. She wore a long red gown. "The therapist suggested I do some activities with calm
me, so I knit this," She said, a smile on her face as she held up a little red sweater, the knitting
needle still attached. "Isn't it adorable? It'll look so lovely on our child-"

Veronica froze in the midst of her words. Taehyung had tears rushing down his face. Her eyes
widened. "Taehyung? What's wrong?" She asked, stepping closer to him. She moved closer, but
before she could make a move, Taehyung stumbled forward and collapsed onto her, falling into her
arms, hiding his face in her neck.

Veronica felt startled but wrapped her arms around him. "Taehyung," She said gently. She couldn't
be harsh with him anymore, couldn't be rough like she used to. It was like the thought of her
actually having a child rid her of her past self and her vices. She was always reminded of her own
mother, how kind she was, how gentle, how loving. How Veronica had been so ungrateful of her
love. She couldn't do the same to Taehyung.

"I-I'm sorry," Taehyung let out weakly, and she shook his head.

"Why are you-? No, it's alright Taehyung, don't be like this." Veronica said, her hands grabbing a
Taehyung's hair. "Don't cry."

"Veronica," Taehyung said faintly, and she shushed him.

"Work's tough. I know it is."

"Veronica-" Taehyung tried again, hugging her tighter.

"You needn't worry about the pregnancy one bit. I'm perfectly fine now. I know I've been quite
sick the past few days-"

"I l-love him, Veronica," Taehyung breathed out. Veronica froze.

Taehyung began sobbing onto her neck. Veronica stood there in the middle of their foyer, still
holding him. "I-I'm in love w-with him," Taehyung cried, so faint she barely heard him.
"I'm sorry. I'm s-sorry."

Veronica stepped away from Taehyung to look at him. "What?" She asked, voice caught in her
throat.

Taehyung looked away, eyes wet with tears. "I'm m-madly in love with him. It's the w-work of
devils, I know it is. Yet I couldn't help myself. Every d-day, I pretended as-as if I wasn't. I wasn't in
love. Yet- I-I-" Taehyung looked at her, guilty. "I'm sorry."

"You're in love with him?" Veronica asked.

"I'm sorry," Taehyung repeated nothing else he could say. He was waiting. Waiting for that fit of
rage, the anger, the harsh slap across his face.

But he got nothing. Veronica just nodded, looking away. "I'm going back to bed." She whispered,
turning around.

"Veronica," Taehyung began, walking closer to her. "This won't change anything. I won't leave
you- I won't leave the child."

"I know you won't. I know," She said, breathless, her eyes glistening with tears. "And I know you
love him. Nothing can be helped with us, Taehyung. We're all stuck in this havoc, all of us. You,
me, him, Rosie. We're stuck here with no way out. There's no happy ending for any of us." She
concluded, and then rushed back to the bedroom, closing the door.

Taehyung drank and didn't sleep all night.

"I'm tired," Jeongguk said as he walked into Yoongi's dressing room. Yoongi was not in drag yet,
but just sitting on his dressing chair with a cigarette hanging loosely from his lips, black hair
falling on his eyes, reading the newspaper.

"What's that, love?" Yoongi asked, not bothering to look up.

"I'm tired of-of him. I despise him and everything he stood for. Everything he told me, Yoongi.
They were all lies. He lied to me the entire time. He pretended he was some sort of shimmering
jewel in the middle of stones but he was- he was-"
"Another stone?"

"Precisely."

"Been there," Yoongi sighed, and then closed the newspaper and got up. "So? Change of plans,
Moonflower? Ready to be dolled up tonight as well?"

"Yes," Jeongguk said firmly, shrugging his jacket off. "I want to perform as well."

"Really?" Yoongi asked, and Jeongguk nodded with endearing inclination. Jeongguk sat down on
his dressing table. "In- in fact! I'll do my own makeup. Except for the eyebrows, help me with that,
will you?" Jeongguk asked. Yoongi brushed the back of his head.

"Of course, sweetheart," Yoongi said. Jeongguk gave him a dazzling smile. "You're lovely when
you're like this. Uncaring of the world and passionate."

"Thank you. I wish I was like this all the time." Jeongguk said, and then looked at himself in the
mirror. "I reckon I'm just afraid. I knew someone who was uncaring of the world and passionate
but turns out he was a coward."

"You can avoid his name but I know you're talking of the stone," Yoongi said, and Jeongguk
giggled.

Yoongi dolled him up (Jeongguk did a little, but Yoongi helped mostly) and then got him into a
pretty white and red pinup dress, his hair black, the wig resembling Marilyn Monroe's hair.
Jeongguk gasped in delight, spinning around. He wore these shoes with long heels, and it was a bit
uncomfortable, but he didn't mind it.

Jeongguk sat down on the seat. "I feel beautiful."

"You look beautiful," Yoongi said, putting his hand on Jeongguk's back. Jeongguk turned a little to
look at the man standing by him. "You'll go out there and sing, won't you?"

"S-sing?" Jeongguk stammered.

"Yes, Moonflower. I heard you singing that tune while I was getting dressed last week. You sound
magical." Yoongi said, and Jeongguk smiled shyly.

"O-oh. Well then, I guess I don't mind it. If it puts on a good show." Jeongguk said, nodding and
looking up at Yoongi from where he was seated.

"Of course you'll put on a good show, look at you," Yoongi said gently, his hands on Jeongguk's
shoulders. Yoongi took one hand and grabbed Jeongguk's chin, turning him to look at his own
reflection. Jeongguk bit his red bottom lip. "Look at you," Yoongi repeated, voice close to his ear.
Jeongguk gulped.

"Yoongi," Jeongguk began, but then felt a feathery kiss against his earlobe. "You're so beautiful,"
Yoongi said, and Jeongguk turned a little to look at him.

Jeongguk blinked his doe eyes. Yoongi pressed their lips together.

Jeongguk reached his hands up to cup Yoongi's cheeks, kissing him deeply, their lips conjoined.
Jeongguk felt Yoongi bite onto his bottom lip and whimpered lightly, pulling away.

Yoongi looked at him, Jeongguk's false eyelashes he had on brushing against Yoongi, his lipstick
smeared. "I'll fuck you after your performance. Does that sound alright?"

"Y-yes." Jeongguk nodded hurriedly. "It- it sounds amazing."

Jeongguk performed that night. He felt timid, many eyes on him from many, many men. They all
looked at him brightly though, recognized him as the shy brown haired boy sat by the bar or stuck
with Champagne. But today, he wore the prettiest dress and had the biggest eyes.

They watched intently as he began singing Diamonds Are A Girl's Best Friend with his soft,
breathy, high voice he had. The crowd looked amazed at how beautiful he sounded, how his voice
was radiant like moonlight.

After he sang another song or two, the crowd cheered and Jeongguk smiled brightly, heart
pounding against his chest. He got off the stage, blushing wildly as he stepped into the dressing
room. Yoongi leaned against the wall.

"Did you see?" Jeongguk asked as he walked towards him.

"Of course I did." Yoongi said in a hushed voice. Before Yoongi could continue, Jeongguk kissed
him, cupping his face. Yoongi hummed into his mouth, gripping his waist which was smaller than
it already was because of the corset he had on underneath.

"Jeongguk," Yoongi said as Jeongguk pressed against him, kissing his neck. "Not here. Not like
this. Get out of these clothes and I'll take you back to my place," Yoongi said.

"Alright." Jeongguk decided. Yoongi helped Jeongguk get out of all of the clothes and makeup.
Then, Yoongi grabbed his hand and they walked out of the bar.

"Do you live nearby?" Jeongguk asked, almost a little whiney as he followed Yoongi down the
pavement.

"Not too far."

"Can't we go back to your dressing room? It's so close." Jeongguk complained, and Yoongi looked
at him.

"Don't be too out of line here, Jeongguk. Wouldn't want to be punished, would you?"

"You don't know that." Jeongguk teased, biting his lip. Yoongi rolled his eyes but had a small coy
smile on his face. Yoongi wrapped his arm around Jeongguk's waist and went down with him, but
before they could continue walking, Jeongguk grabbed Yoongi into an aisle and pressed him
against the wall.

"Jeongguk..." Yoongi trailed. "Not outside."

"No one's here," Jeongguk whispered, breath hovering upon Yoongi's neck. "I want to kiss you."

"This is only to forget, alright? Nothing changes. Don't fall in love." Yoongi said, and Jeongguk
nodded hurriedly. Jeongguk never wanted to fall in love again.

Jeongguk pressed his lips with Yoongi's, whose hands went straight to Jeongguk's waist. Jeongguk
had the smaller man pinned against the wall, their lips moving softly. It wasn't like Taehyung, but
it didn't have to be. Jeongguk wanted anything but Taehyung at the moment.

"Jeongguk-" Yoongi began hastily as Jeongguk's hand went lower. "Darling, sweetheart, I know. I
know you're needy. But we just can't do it outside-"

"It's dark and almost midnight," Jeongguk said, and then got down on his knees in front of him.
"No one will know."

"Jeongguk, you're being pointedly frivolous. I-I can't-" Yoongi began.

"Why're you so afraid? You're the bravest man I've ever met, yet-"

"There are some things I have to fear," Yoongi said, and now he sounded panicked, unsure.
"Jeongguk just- just get up-"

"Yoongi, I-" Jeongguk began, looking up at the man from where he was on his knees. Before he
could continue, a loud horn sound came.

A chuckle followed. Jeongguk instantly saw Yoongi's head drop low, face pale further. Jeongguk
got up on his feet hastily, and then looked to the side and stilled.

Policemen.

"Disgusting. I thought I'd warned you when I put you in jail three years ago, hadn't I, Min
Yoongi?" The man's voice came abruptly as he walked to them, dressed in his police uniform, a
pistol attached to his belt.

Jeongguk felt fear rise within him, eyes widening. "O-oh my god," Jeongguk let out, and the
policeman grabbed Jeongguk roughly from the back.

"Sir, you are under arrest for performing acts of homosexuality. Anything you do or say can be
used against you in the court of law-" The man said as he grabbed Jeongguk's wrists behind his
back and pushed him out of the alleyway.

"N-no-" Jeongguk cried, and then shook his head, turning and seeing Yoongi still in the aisle.
"Yoongi! Yoo-Yoongi-!!" Jeongguk called for help, but then he got pushed into the back of the
police vehicle. Jeongguk felt tears reach his eyes.

A man sat in the driver's seat. Jeongguk looked at him, breath hitched. The man looked grum, eyes
cold and green, looking at Jeongguk with pure disgust. "You ready to rot in a prison cell, faggot?
It's what you deserve, sick bastards like you."

Jeongguk began crying, tears streaming down his face. The driver looked at the other policeman,
who was still stood outside the car. "I'll go close down that horrid bar nearby, you get this one to
the station." The man said. The policeman in the driver's seat nodded and drove off.

Yoongi still stood in the aisle, against the wall. The policeman saw the car drive off and then
turned around to walk over to Yoongi.

"You promised you'd stop," Yoongi said softly, and the man looked away. "You promised
you'd stop-"

"I didn't promise anything." The policeman bit, looking at him, eyes darkened. "What were you
doing here with that kid? Aren't you meant to be playing dress up right now?"

"Don't call it that," Yoongi said, faint. The policeman stepped closer to him, and then pinned him
against the wall.
"I haven't seen you for days." The policeman whispered to Yoongi's ear, sending chills down his
spine.

"H-Hoseok," Yoongi let out weakly, and then felt Hoseok's hands go under his thighs, lips pressing
together.

"Fuck," Yoongi whispered when Hoseok pulled away, his blue deputy badge pressing against
Yoongi's chest. "Take me to yours."

"Alright. But leave the next morning, don't ask for more." Hoseok said sharply, and Yoongi's chest
rose and fell for a few seconds, but he nodded, hanging his head low. Hoseok then moved away
from him and walked to his police car, and Yoongi followed in a distance.

The chatter of the two working police officers in the early morning shackled Jeongguk's sleep. He
opened his eyes suddenly and then felt cold all around him. He was sat on the cement floor of the
prison cell, leaning against the corner, his eyes drooping, jabbing pain in the left side of his head.

"-and he's the 20th homo we've caught this month. We ought to be putting them in hospitals or
something." One of the policemen muttered.

Jeongguk sniffled, his mouth dry. He'd spent the whole night in that prison cell, falling in and out
of sleep, mainly crying every time he woke back up. He needed water.

"Oh well. They'll end up in hell. You know how it is." One of the other policemen laughed, and
Jeongguk looked at him. It was the man from the day before, with his black hair and kind eyes
which contrasted his sharp, cutting words. Hoseok, his name was.

Hoseok caught a glimpse of Jeongguk and walked towards the prison cell, the black bars dividing
Hoseok, the societal brilliance, from Jeongguk, the rotting flesh of earth who was imprisoned.

"How old are you, kid?" Hoseok asked.

"23, sir," Jeongguk said feebly, looking smaller than ever, cooped up in the corner.

Hoseok looked at him for a few seconds. "Don't do this to yourself," Hoseok said, voice quieter so
the other men couldn't hear. "Don't ruin your life like this. It isn't worth it. It never is. Get married
to a girl, have a child, live life like that. Whatever it is going through your brain which makes you
want... men, forget it. You'll hurt everyone and yourself in the process."

Jeongguk stilled. "Y-yes sir." Jeongguk's voice cracked.

The doors of the police office burst open. Hoseok looked to the side, startled and looking annoyed.
"Um- who let you walk in here like-"

"Kim Taehyung." A curt voice came, and Jeongguk brought his head up, eyes widened. His mouth
almost fell open in disbelief. Taehyung stood there in a simple grey suit, no tie on, his blonde hair
brushed back. "I'm Jeon Jeongguk's lawyer. Tell me how much the fine is, I'll pay it."

Jeongguk was frozen, watching Taehyung, how his dark eyebrows were furrowed. He looked
angry. Very angry.

"Sir, um, we have to contact chief and-"

"Don't care. Give me the price. You have absolutely no evidence that my client was caught doing
homosexual acts. That's absolute bullshit. Who do you want me to rely on? Your word? That's not
enough. So either let me pay the fine, or I'll have to take this to court for wrongly accusing my
client. Neither of us wants that, now do we?" Taehyung asked, raising his eyebrow.

The police officers looked a bit frightened. Hoseok cleared his throat and stated the price, and
Taehyung paid it off out of his wallet. Then, Hoseok took the key and unlocked the prison doors,
opening it to let Jeongguk out.

"There was evidence, by the way. I saw him in that aisle by that notorious faggot club. He was on
his knees in front of another man. I'm sure they weren't just making conversation." Hoseok spat,
and Taehyung looked at him, walking closer.

"And you, Jung Hoseok, is it?" Taehyung asked, and then eyed him, letting his eyes trail up to
down, and then back up to meet his eyes. "You've never been on your knees for another man?"

"W-what?" Hoseok let out, eyes growing cautious. Taehyung gave him a close look.

"I know more than you do. I'm aware of what goes on. If any of you try to touch him," Taehyung
said, gesturing at Jeongguk. "I know multiple ways of getting you imprisoned, Mr. Jung. And I'm
quite certain you wouldn't appreciate that."

"Take him," Hoseok muttered, pushing Jeongguk out of the cell. Taehyung grabbed Jeongguk by
his back and led him out, ignoring Hoseok's mean glare.

"Tae- how-how did you-?"

"Yoongi called me early this morning. Told me what happened." Taehyung gritted, and once they
were out of the police stations and hit with the bright daylight, Taehyung let Jeongguk go. "What in
the world were you thinking?!"

"I-" Jeongguk looked at him. "I-I wasn't."

"Pretty fucking evident. On your- on your knees for another man? In an aisle in public? Are you
out of your mind, Jeongguk?" Taehyung snapped.

"You're just jealous," Jeongguk said in a small voice.

"Jealous?" Taehyung asked, raising his eyebrow.

Jeongguk's stood there for a few seconds. There was no one else in the vacant parking lot, except
Taehyung's car on the side. Taehyung walked closer to him.

"I just saved your fucking life," Taehyung growled, low. "You could've been imprisoned for
months, years even, because you don't fucking understand that life isn't a magical dreamland where
you can do as you please and live as you want. You think the rest of us aren't going over our
fucking minds trying to piece it together, Jeongguk??"

Jeongguk was frozen still. "You think- you think the rest of us don't want to let go of every single
responsibility and go out to bars late at night and fuck men in the middle of the streets? Hm?"
Taehyung said, closer to him. Jeongguk was looking away.
"None of us are happy. None of us are pleased with the lives we lead. I want to-" Taehyung began,
and then grabbed Jeongguk's shirt. "I want to fucking push you to the wall and kiss you with all my
might right now, do you understand that??" Taehyung shouted, but he sounded weak. "But I can't,
Jeongguk. I can't! I can't fucking do a thing because- because- we just can't! Why can't you just
fucking understand that?!"

Jeongguk looked at him, tears streaming down his face. Jeongguk shook his head, pushed him
away. "I d-don't want to-"

"Stop trying to be happy, Jeongguk," Taehyung said, vein thickening in his neck. "It can't be
possible. Not in this world, not in any. We aren't meant to be happy, don't you understand that?
People like you and me? We're meant to grief and get married to women we'll never love. We don't
get to decide who we love, the world does."

"I-It shouldn't." Jeongguk was crying. "I d-don't want it to."

"If I could change the whole world for you so- so you could love whoever you want I would,"
Taehyung said weakly, coming closer to him. Jeongguk looked at him, sobbing. "If I could live in a
world where two men can love each other openly, I would."

"Y-You can't." Jeongguk looked down, tears rushing down, his voice bubbling. He felt like a child.
He couldn't see a thing. "You can't."

"I know that. Why- why don't you know that?" Taehyung asked, gripping his waist. "Why haven't
you given up?"

Jeongguk looked at Taehyung, who had tears in his eyes. "I-I gave up, Jeongguk. I couldn't do it. I
couldn't be the man I wanted to be, I h-had to be the man everyone wants me to be instead. I
couldn't be the man who leaves everything behind to chase after love. I couldn't-"

Jeongguk brought him closer and wrapped his arms around his neck, crying into his chest.
Taehyung wrapped his arms around his waist, his own tears falling onto his hair. They hugged in
silence, not saying a word, just crying. Just crying.

After a while, Jeongguk got into Taehyung's car and Taehyung drove him home. They reached his
house.

"Take care of yourself." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk ignored him.

Jeongguk said a fruitless goodbye and walked out of the car, not looking back, just walking to his
flat. Jeongguk opened the door and then stopped.

It had to be today of all days.

"Jeongguk!" Rosie said upon seeing him. She was in a white dress, hair neatly combed, smiling at
him. "Where were you? I returned last night,"

"Hello," Jeongguk said, walking in. Rosie's smile fell. "You- you look sickly. Are you alright?"

"Are you? You've been gone a month," Jeongguk said.

"I-I am. The babies are fine too." Rosie said, talking about her sister's children. Jeongguk hummed.
She grabbed his arms.

"Are you alright?" Rosie asked. "Where were you?"

"I was.... I was with a friend." Jeongguk said, looking away.

"Which friend?" Jeongguk didn't respond. Rosie looked at him. "Jeongguk? What- what
happened?"

Rosie saw tears rise in his eyes. She grabbed his hands tighter. Taehyung's words rang in his head.

We don't get to decide who we love, the world does.

The world does.

Jeongguk looked at her. The world does.

"I'm gay." Jeongguk breathed out, leaving Rosie's hands.

Rosie paused. She blinked at him a few times. "Wh-what?"

"I'm gay," Jeongguk repeated, looking at her, stepping back. "I-I'm homosexual."

"What?" Rosie repeated, looking at him with a straight face, eyebrows slightly lifted.

"I like men," Jeongguk whispered. Rosie continued looking at him with no expression. Jeongguk
gulped. "I-I like men, Rosie."

She was still for a while, and Jeongguk felt... fear? Rosie had no face change, just her breathing
pattern changed. She blinked her eyes.

"What?" She said again, her face twitching.

"Rosie." Jeongguk began. "I-I'm so sorry. You don't deserve a husband like me. You deserve
someone who loves you. Who- who cares for you. I'm- I'm not the man you want either. I don't like
women."

"What do you mean you don't like women?" Rosie asked, gentle. "How can you not like women?"

"I just.... don't feel any attraction to them," Jeongguk said, looking away. "I-I've never felt it, forced
myself to believe I had. But- but as time went on... I couldn't ignore that part of me, Rosie. The part
of me which- which feels a greater attraction to men."

Rosie took a step away from him. Jeongguk looked at her. "It was Taehyung, wasn't it?" Rosie
asked, eyes big.

"Rosie-"

"He-" Rosie began, and then looked away. "It was him. Wasn't it?"

"Yes." Jeongguk's shoulders rose in defense. "I-I'm in love with him."

Rosie's eyebrows rose up. She very slowly very tangibly turned to look at him. "You're what?"

"We've been... we were together for months. He even took me to France. I f-fell in love with him."

There was no response, and it was silent for far, far too long. Cutting silence, one which made
Jeongguk gasp out in a breath. "Oh god Rosie, say s-something," Jeongguk begged.

"You... you like men," Rosie said, nodding, looking away, eyes glassy. "And you're in love with
Taehyung. You- you like men and you love Taehyung. You don't love me."

"No." Jeongguk squeaked.

"Right. Right, of course. Yes." Rosie nodded. She slowly looked at him. Jeongguk had not one clue
what went through her mind at that moment. "Of course. Of course, Jeongguk. It makes sense."

"I-It does?" Jeongguk asked, a little hopeful. He was against the door. Rosie walked closer to him.

"Jeongguk," Rosie began gently. "I knew something was wrong. I-I should've known." She said,
whispering. "It's alright." She brought her hands out. "Everything's alright."

Jeongguk's eyes were wide. He was utterly confused. "It is?" Jeongguk asked, and she grabbed his
hands. Jeongguk looked at her hands, and then at her. Rosie smiled.

"It's okay. You can't help it." Rosie whispered. "You feel you've fallen in love, haven't you?"

"Y-yes, but-" Jeongguk began, and Rosie shushed him, grabbing his hands tighter.

"It's okay, Jeongguk." She said, so soft, so gentle. "I'm happy you told me. Don't worry."

"Oh." Jeongguk smiled a little. "O-oh. I didn't- I didn't think you'd react like- like this. I-I guess I
thought you'd be upset, or-"

"It's alright. Don't worry." Rosie said and then brought him close, wrapping her arms around him.
Jeongguk stilled for a second but hugged her back. He smiled to himself, and it was quiet for a few
seconds, but then;

"I'll get you what you need, Jeongguk," Rosie said. "I'll help you. I know what it is, I studied it."
Rosie said, whispering. "I'll take you to the hospital. We'll fix you. Don't worry. Don't worry."

Jeongguk's whole body reacted before his mind alerted himself of what's going on. Jeongguk
pushed Rosie away. "What?" He breathed out.

"It's okay," Rosie repeated. "I know you're feeling tremendously emotional right now, but it's
common. Don't worry. You're just sick, Jeongguk. You're just sick."

"Sick?" Jeongguk asked, and then felt lightheaded when he realized what was going on. "Oh god.
Rosie, no, no no- it's not- it's not like-"

"Jeongguk," Rosie grabbed him by the arms. Jeongguk suddenly got grabbed and placed onto the
sofa. "It's alright. You just need some medicine. Some therapy. You need a doctor. Taehyung-
Taehyung's a bad man, okay? What he did to you was wrong. I'm so sorry, Jeongguk. I'm sorry.
Taehyung's a terrible man, and you're just- you're just sick in the head-"

"I'm not!" Jeongguk cried, pushing her off when she tried hugging him once more. Jeongguk stood
up from the sofa. "You don't understand, Rosie! I'm fine, I'm absolutely fine. I'm not sick. It's
normal. I'm telling you, it's normal for men to love men and for women to love women. I just- I
don't love y-you anym-"

"You can't love men."

"I do, Rosie, I-I know it sounds absurd, but-" Jeongguk looked up. Rosie slapped him across the
face.

Jeongguk flinched and stumbled back, looking at her with widened eyes. "You don't understand,
Jeongguk. If I don't help you, you'll burn in hell. You'll burn in hell, Jeongguk. I'm helping you-"

"F-for fuck's sake, Rosie, what's wrong with you?" Jeongguk asked, eyes widening in fear when
she grabbed his wrists.

"I know something they did at the hospital." She said, fast. She smiled at him kindly. "They put
these patients in a room and- and they shocked them with electricity, Jeongguk. It helps. I heard it
helps. It'll help, Jeongguk-"

"R-Rosie! I'm fine, I'm a-absolutely fine! Do you hear yourself??" Jeongguk cried, and then
pushed her off and rushed towards the door. He put his shoes on quickly. "Y-you've gone insane.
You're- you're acting manic!"

"I'm t-trying to help, Jeongguk!" Rosie shouted, and Jeongguk looked at her. "You're a man, for
god's sake! You're not meant to be like other men, or-or feel attraction towards them! It's wrong,
it's just plain wrong, do you hear me?"

"I-it's not." Jeongguk shook his head. "It's not wrong."

"You-" Rosie took a deep breath. "You're fucking sickening." Rosie let out, and Jeongguk froze.
She'd never swore before. "You're absolutely fucking disgusting. Men. With men. You could've
killed yourself, that would've been less immoral than you being with a man."

Jeongguk's words were caught in his throat, eyes wide. "R-Rosie." Jeongguk squeaked out, and
then he opened the door and walked out, closing it behind him quickly.

He had no clue where to go. The bar was a place he feared, for he didn't want to see Yoongi. He
couldn't go to Jimin, there would be too much to explain. He had to go somewhere before Rosie
went crazy and did something worse.

Taehyung. He could only go to Taehyung.

**
 Chapter 24
Chapter Notes

sorry for taking so long to update! kind of a filler chapter hehe

**

It was a gloomy afternoon when the door of Taehyung's house opened wide. Jeongguk looked pale,
eyes teary, hands jittering by his side. It was evident that he needed something- someone.

Except, it wasn't Taehyung who opened the door, it was Veronica.

Jeongguk's breath hitched. Veronica looked at him. Jeongguk let his shoulders drop, sucking in a
sharp breath. "I-I didn't know where else to go."

Veronica opened the door wider, let him come inside because it was already drizzling and the rain
might get worse. Jeongguk stepped inside, feeling like an intruder in her house.

Before Jeongguk could speak, Veronica did. "Rosie found out, didn't she?" Veronica said, and
Jeongguk looked at her.

He nodded and then felt a tear go down his face. "I feel guilty. Of- of course, I do. I w-was forced
into marriage, but she never did anything horrible. No, Rosie was always so kind, forgiving."
Jeongguk gulped. "I didn't expect her to react so discourteously."

"You've been cheating on her for months, did you expect her to laugh?" Veronica said in disbelief.

Jeongguk inched away from her. "No. I expected her to be rather angered with me. But-but she
wasn't angered about Taehyung. She was more angered that I'm gay, and-"

"Why, how stupid of her. Her husband fancies her best friend's husband and wants his cock.
How dare she react negatively?" Veronica gasped sarcastically.

Jeongguk looked at her, wavering. "I see you're not quite pleased with me, are you?"

Veronica looked away. "What else did she say to you?"

"She said I should be put into a mental facility, that- that I should've just-" Jeongguk toyed with his
fingers. "Killed myself. That'd be less bad."

Veronica stilled at that. "Rosie said that? That doesn't sound like her at all,"

"Exactly." Jeongguk breathed out. "She s-slapped me, and-" Jeongguk paused for a second,
remembering Veronica's previous nature. "-and said I should go to the hospital. That I was sick in
the head. A-and-" Jeongguk felt a tear go down his cheek. "I'm not." He squeaked.

"Sit down," Veronica said after a bit of silence, in a hushed tone. "I'll make you some tea."

Jeongguk sat down on the couch of their living room, his fingers still jittering. He felt unable to
think properly, Rosie's words going over and over in his mind. Sick in the head. Jeongguk wasn't.
He was so aware of how he felt, what his heart wanted, what his mind wanted. He was so aware of
who he was. In fact, the realization of his sexuality made him feel the most normal he'd felt in his
whole life.

Veronica returned with a cup of tea. She sat down beside him. "I'll talk to Rosie."

"Thank you," Jeongguk whispered, and grabbed the cup of milk tea in the white cup with a gold
handle. "Honestly, I'm a little surprised at how understanding you're being,"

Veronica chuckled. "I feel like," Veronica began, and then took a deep breath. "After years, I've
finally found some sort of stability. I ran away from everything I knew at a very young age and got
married to Taehyung. We didn't know anything, let alone how to love each other properly. We just
knew we were in love, and- and that seemed enough."

"It wasn't?" Jeongguk asked, and Veronica snickered. "No. It wasn't. We were foolish, thought we
could outdo the world around us. Thought our marriage was an act of rebellion against arbitrary
authority. When really, it was just recklessness."

"But now," Veronica continued. "Now I refuse to speak to my father, I lost my mother, I-I lost a
part of my husband because of my own liability. I have-I have a child and, it makes me realize I
have someone. I have myself, and now my baby." Veronica smiled, it reaching her eyes before it
did her lips.

Jeongguk smiled a little. "Do you want a boy or a girl?"

"Wouldn't a girl be lovely," Veronica said, still smiling. "I'd raise her to be strong, independent,
cautious of the world around her but calculative. But I wouldn't mind a son either. Raise him to be
the most perfect gentleman, unlike many I know."

"Taehyung wants a girl as well," Jeongguk nodded. "I would like having children, but... I doubt I
can."

Veronica looked at him questioningly, and Jeongguk chuckled. "I-I reckon I'll be filing for a
divorce with Rosie now."

"A divorce at such a young age. Oh my, her life's headed to the ruins." Veronica said. This time it
was Jeongguk's turn to be confused. Veronica looked at him.

"She's a woman, Jeongguk. Unmarried women, divorced women, women who aren't perfect wives
and aren't the ideal of society- they're frowned upon. I doubt Rosie will get a job anywhere. Maybe
she could continue as a nurse."

Jeongguk looked tethered. "I don't intend on making life so difficult for Rosie. But being with her
won't make things favorable either. We'll be better off alone. She never really loved me, she just
loved the idea of who I was."

"A strong man. Don't we all want a strong man to take care of us and only gift us with sex and
money?" Veronica said dryly, sarcastic.
"I wouldn't mind," Jeongguk said, then taking a sip of his tea. Veronica chuckled at his statement.

"You know, I sometimes wished I were a man," Veronica said, and then bit her lip. "There's
nothing wrong with being a woman, I love myself how I am. Yet... men get to do things I don't.
And I know I wouldn't get reprimanded for some of the things I enjoy if I were of the opposite
sex."

"I know exactly how you feel," Jeongguk said, eyes glittering and wide. He didn't think anyone
else would understand this feeling, but Veronica had put it into words in front of him.

"We're quite similar in that way, you and I," Veronica said, looking away. Jeongguk hummed,
seeing her dark jet black hair tied up, wearing a maroon shirt and a long black skirt, no makeup on
yet looking pristine. She was beautiful, there was no denying. Her posture was impeccable, much
like everything about her.

They both heard the door of the house open. Some footsteps. Taehyung turned swiftly into the
living room. "Whose shoes are in the front- oh."

Taehyung's eyes widened upon seeing Jeongguk and Veronica, sitting on the same couch, civil,
Jeongguk drinking tea. Nothing made sense. "Oh. Jeongguk- you-you're here."

"Yes. Um. I had a problem back home," Jeongguk said in a small voice, not looking at the man.
Felt it disrespectful to do so when Veronica was right beside him. He was the mistress, after all.

"You two boys have a chat." Veronica stood up. "I'll go speak with Rosie," Veronica said, and then
walked to the opening of the living room where Taehyung was stood. "A chat, nothing else,"
Veronica whispered to Taehyung.

Veronica left the house, the closing of the door creating a louder silence in the house. Taehyung
was stood there for a few seconds. Jeongguk looked back at him.

"I had nowhere else to g-go. I need- I need to be away from Rosie for a little while. I can't-"
Jeongguk began weakly, and as he spoke, Taehyung walked closer to the boy. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry
for coming here, but-but-"

Taehyung sat down by him. There was some tension between them. As if both wanted to leap into
each other's arms but couldn't. "What happened?"

Jeongguk explained it, how Rosie reacted, that he told her, that he shouldn't have, but he couldn't
help it. After his story was done, Taehyung chuckled.

"You've been rather abrasive and confident lately, haven't you?" Taehyung asked.

"Learned it from someone I knew," Jeongguk replied, a small smile on his face.

There was a bit of silence. "So. Yoongi?" Taehyung asked hesitantly, and Jeongguk giggled.

"No. I mean, he-he's like a mentor to me. Guiding me through life or what not. It wasn't going to
mean anything. We were just going to have sex. Which..." Jeongguk trailed. "I've never really done
before. I reckon I would've gotten attached. So- so it's good that nothing happened between us."

Taehyung chuckled, and the sound surprised Jeongguk, made him turn his head. "Ah. You're
reminding me of me."

"What? Passionate?" Jeongguk asked.

"No. Reckless," Taehyung said and didn't wait to see Jeongguk's face drop. Taehyung got up to
walk over to where the liquor was kept in a shelf, along with a glass.

"I'm not being reckless. I know- I know I did a stupid thing by trying to suck Yoongi's cock in the
alleyway. I know I should be more aware of these things. But I'm not making mistakes. I'm just
learning." Jeongguk said.

"You'll grow out of it," Taehyung said while pouring whiskey into a glass.

"Grow out of what?"

"This thing," Taehyung said, turning to him. "You know, if you want my advice, then here's what
I'd suggest. Don't get a divorce with Rosie. Stay married to her. Just-just stop all these senseless
homosexuality findings you've been indulging yourself in. Focus on law school. You'll become an
attorney in a few years and look back to your past and laugh, really."

Jeongguk was frozen still. "Pardon? Are you basically saying I should give up and live life like
every other man there is?"

"There's a reason why every man is every man there is," Taehyung said, convoluted. "Society
doesn't like change. It doesn't like rebellion. And, you know, you might be unhappy now, but in the
long term-"

"Don't think of the long term, Taehyung. Think of now. Are you happy? Are you really happy?"
Jeongguk said, walking towards him. "If 20 years later I have every luxury in life, I still won't be
happy. So what's going to be your advice for me then, hm? Fall into drinking? Smoking? Sleeping
with other women? Sounds familiar, doesn't it?"

Taehyung looked at him unfalteringly, as if trying his hardest not to show a reaction. Taehyung
took a sip of his whiskey. "Life isn't meant to be sunshine."

"Well, we can try, can't we? Isn't that why our fathers fought the wars? To give us the chance to
live?" Jeongguk asked.

Taehyung looked away, not daring to look at Jeongguk. He took another slow sip of his drink.
Jeongguk shook his head. "You'll regret letting me go."

"I already do," Taehyung whispered faintly, and Jeongguk snapped his head towards him, eyes
wider. "I did from the second I let you go."

"W-what?" Jeongguk asked, and Taehyung looked at him.

"Jeongguk," Taehyung said, keeping the glass down. "Do you think it's been simple for me?
Letting go the only-only person who's really tried to understand me, tried to love me? Who, with
every second I spent, made me nothing but utterly happy?" Taehyung continued.

"Taehyung," Jeongguk said, closing his eyes. "Don't lie to me."

"I wish," Taehyung gripped his forearm, pulling him closer. "I wish I were lying to you. I wish we
never met. I wish you didn't show me how much happier I could be than what I was. I wish you
didn't make me ache to hold you each night."

"Don't say all this. Don't." Jeongguk whispered, voice breaking. "I-if you mean it then-
then come to me. Come back to me, Taehyung. We can work it out. We always can." Jeongguk
squeaked.
Taehyung shook his head. "We can't. We can't. I can't just-" Taehyung let Jeongguk's hand go.
"Being a good father to me is more important than chasing after graceless love," Taehyung
breathed out.

Jeongguk closed his eyes. He nodded, unable to look at Taehyung, knowing that Taehyung was
giving Jeongguk up for his future child. How good that made him and how angry that made
Jeongguk. Jeongguk turned around to sit back down on the couch, trying not to cry.

Taehyung sat beside him. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay." Jeongguk squeaked. "I-I n-never had a father. I know you'll make an amazing one."
Jeongguk sniffled.

Taehyung put his arm around Jeongguk and pulled him into a hug. Jeongguk lay his head against
Taehyung's chest, letting tears roll down his face. They stayed like that for some while until
Jeongguk's tears ceased and they sat there, hearing each other's heartbeats, quiet.

Veronica came back. "Rosie's gone mental."

"Veronica, you can't say such a thing," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk looked at her in confusion.

"She has! She's saying Taehyung shouldn't have gotten Jeongguk out of jail. Rosie's the most
gentle and lovely girl I know yet she's acting most certainly mindless. I understand that she's
angered, but some of the things she said... I can't even say them out loud. They're too horrid, even
for me!" Veronica spluttered.

"I don't want to go back to the house. I'm scared of her." Jeongguk admitted, and Taehyung
snickered at him.

"Scared of a girl?" Taehyung joked, but there was a dead silence. Taehyung cleared his throat,
looking between Veronica and Jeongguk. "I-I didn't mean it like that-"

"Moving along. I'm sure there's a-a motel nearby. Perhaps one closer to school. I'll get my things.
I'll call Jimin, in fact, he'll-" Jeongguk began, getting up.

"Nonsense. Stay here." Taehyung said, smiling a little. "We have a spare room. You can be
comfortable. Your work's near to mine."

Jeongguk gulped and looked at Veronica. She looked at Taehyung, who was looking up at
Jeongguk with a hopeful look on his face. Veronica tsked. "You can stay for a day or two,"
Veronica said, sighing.

"Thank you. Thank you ever so much." Jeongguk said.

"Well, it's no problem, really. You've already slept on my bed, so." Veronica smiled. Jeongguk's
smile faltered, and Taehyung coughed at the uneasiness.

"I'm going to go get freshen up," Taehyung mumbled, and then walked away. Jeongguk silently
begged for him to stay by widening his eyes at him, but Taehyung didn't get a hint and left, leaving
the two alone.

"By the way, did you say Jimin?" Veronica asked, raising her eyebrow. Jeongguk nodded. "Is he
your age? Rather pretty? Plump lips, black hair? High voice? Small hands?"

"That's him. Why, do you know him?" Jeongguk asked, and Veronica went silent for a second, and
then chuckled.

"Yeah. I do." Veronica hummed and then turned around to walk into the kitchen. Jeongguk
nodded, unaware for a few seconds, but then the realization hit him why Veronica would know
Jimin and oh god-

For the rest of the day, the house was palpable with tension. Jeongguk sat in the study, doing some
work for law school. He was sure he was making Veronica avidly uncomfortable. Why would she
want the man that slept with her husband staying in the same house as her?

"What're you working on?" Taehyung asked, and Jeongguk's body twitched at Taehyung's fingers
falling lightly on his shoulder. Jeongguk turned his head, saw Taehyung standing there with a glass
of whiskey in his hand.

"Just some homework for Contracts I need to give in two days," Jeongguk said softly. Taehyung
leaned in a bit to look at his work.

"I always resented that class. I always scored highest in presentations or class debates. As you can
probably guess," Taehyung winked at Jeongguk, who giggled.

"Of course. You're so intimidating, I'm sure you were so back then."

"Ah, no, built it up over the years. Confidence is key to being a lawyer. You show a little bit of
fear, and that's the first thing the other side will attack." Taehyung said. Jeongguk nodded.

Jeongguk watched as Taehyung took a sip of his whiskey. "Aren't you drinking too much,
Taehyung?" Jeongguk asked, eyes wide in worry.

"Don't worry, pretty. I always drink a little after work." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk blushed at
the nickname that slipped out of his mouth.

"You shouldn't do it every day. Maybe try and lessen i-it," Jeongguk stammered when he noticed
how close Taehyung was, and how he was smiling fondly.

"You're so caring, Ggukie," Taehyung said, words hushed. "Never fail to amaze me with you...
amazing you are. Like an angel."

"Angel," Jeongguk said, biting onto his lip, looking up, blinking his long lashes. "I swear, your
words are always so effortlessly charming. Yet you're unaware of it."

"Who said I'm unaware of it? I know the intention behind my words and how it affects people.
Especially you. You're blushing, look at you." Taehyung smiled, eased.

"Taehyung," Jeongguk said hesitantly when Taehyung's lips breathed faintly over his own.
"Taehyung,"

"Stop me, I won't be able to stop myself," Taehyung admitted quietly, one hand on the back of
Jeongguk's neck, tilting his own to press his lips just against Jeongguk's mouth till-

"Taehyung."

"What?" Taehyung muttered in annoyance, looking at Jeongguk.

"That wasn't me," Jeongguk whispered, and then they both turned and saw Veronica standing at
the doorway, an eyebrow risen.
"Oh. Um. Love, we were just working on Jeongguk's work. I was helping." Taehyung said, smiling
at her. She knew he was lying. He knew she knew he was lying. Jeongguk knew that Taehyung
knew that Veronica knew that he was lying.

"Come. Talk to me outside for a minute." Veronica said, and Jeongguk blushed bright and
continued working. Taehyung walked outside.

"Veronica, really, it's not that serious-"

"Have you told him?" Veronica asked. "Have you told him you're in love with him yet?"

They stood by the stairs, away from the study. Taehyung's hole posture fell, a vulnerability he
exposed infrequently. "N-no. Not yet." Taehyung said. "I won't."

"I don't know how you want me to react to all this. I can't even talk to my therapist. He'll send you
to jail. Good god."

"Veronica, breathe. Don't get stressed out. You know this doesn't matter, love. None of it does. In-
in 7 months, we'll have our little baby. Our little Joan." Taehyung said softly, and Veronica looked
up at him.

"Like Joan of Arc?" Veronica asked timidly, and Taehyung chuckled.

"Yes. I saw you write it down in your diary." Taehyung said, tucking a strand of her hair behind her
ear.

"O-oh." She blushed faintly. "Yes. I think that'd be a wonderful name. Don't you?"

"I do. Joan if it's a girl, and Victor if it's a boy." Taehyung kissed her cheek gently. "Don't fret, my
love."

"I'll try not to," Veronica mumbled, clearly not as pleased about this situation as Taehyung was.

Later, Jeongguk helped for dinner, saying he'd make it instead to help out. Veronica grudgingly
said yes (or, happily, because she wanted to lie down). The three sat down in the dinner table after
the meal was cooked, and Veronica and Taehyung very much moaned when they ate the food.

"This is amazing," Veronica said. "You must give me the recipe."

"I told you, Jeongguk's brilliant at cooking. I think it's the glazed potato on top, isn't it? My, I
remember the-" Taehyung chuckled midway, looking at Jeongguk. "The time you came over to
help make dinner for me. We never ended up eating it, did we? Right, no, right before eating it we
decided to have-" Taehyung began, and then froze.

Jeongguk blushed bright red, and Veronica dropped her fork and pinched the bridge of her nose.
Taehyung let it go and continued eating food, deciding to stay quiet instead.

After a few minutes with no words being passed, just food being eaten, Taehyung spoke up. "My
god. Is that how my hair's been looking all evening?" Taehyung said, looking at his own reflection
in his fork.

"Taehyung, you're a delight, but you truly are the most self-absorbed person I've ever met,"
Jeongguk said, and Taehyung frowned at him, confused.

"I know!" Veronica gasped. "All he does is look at his own reflection every time we pass a mirror,
or silverware, or water."

"Right! One time he was looking into my eyes, and I asked what was wrong, and it turned out he
was looking at his own reflection in my pupils!" Jeongguk muttered.

"How horribly self-invested you are, Taehyung," Veronica said. Taehyung was in shock.

"Oh come on, stop rallying up against me-" Taehyung began.

"Have you also noticed how he tends to flirt with almost every living person when he's outside?"
Veronica said to Jeongguk, who dropped his spoon and nodded hastily.

"Yes! Oh my gosh, it's absolutely horrid. To waitresses, air hostesses, my own friend," Jeongguk
named.

"My aunt, my mother, to Rosie. Do you really have to flirt with everyone you come across,
Taehyung?" Veronica snapped, and Jeongguk frowned at him as well.

Taehyung quietly ate his food, blushing. Jeongguk giggled at how he looked, almost shy and
embarrassed. "Sorry, Taehyung. We're only teasing, you know it's because we care for you."

"Speak for yourself," Veronica said to Jeongguk, scoffing. Jeongguk giggled, and Taehyung tsked
at her.

"Now now, let's calm down. Change the topic of discussion to the bedroom, and I'm neither of you
would have anything negative to say." Taehyung snickered.

Jeongguk and Veronica were quiet for a very long while. Painfully long. And then, "That is
disgusting." Veronica said.

"You're so vulgar," Jeongguk added.

"Talking about sex while we're eating dinner." Veronica shook her head. Jeongguk started laughing
when Taehyung scoffed in confusion.

After dinner, Veronica went to go lie down because she felt fatigued. Taehyung and Jeongguk
cleaned up the dinner table. Jeongguk walked into the kitchen to keep the plates in the sink and
then spotted the polka dotted red frilly apron hung in the side.

Taehyung saw him looking and smirked. "You know, I bought it just for you."

Jeongguk began washing the plates, shaking his head. "I know now how many lies you told me
just to get me in bed with you."

"Well, it clearly worked, because you stayed in my bed for a long time after," Taehyung teased,
and Jeongguk blushed.

He then felt Taehyung's arms wrap around his waist. "I missed you." A kiss to the nape.

"Taehyung you can't do these sort of things," Jeongguk said. "We're not together. I-It'll just hurt me
more, it'll-"

"I know, I just want you to know that I missed you," Taehyung said, placing his chin on Jeongguk's
shoulder. "That day, in your firm, when you said those things to me. I-I don't think I've cried so
much since ever."
Jeongguk gulped, stopping the washing of the plate for a second. "I'm sorry."

"You only spoke the truth. I'm aware of it now, at least." Taehyung sighed.

Jeongguk finished cleaning up (minimal help from Taehyung) and then Jeongguk felt sleepy, also
asked where he could sleep. Taehyung poured himself another glass of whiskey and then nodded.

"Sleep in the guest room," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk noticed him pouring in a bit more
whiskey than usual. "I'll lead you to it." Taehyung closed the lid of the whiskey bottle and then
walked with Jeongguk to the room beside his and Veronica's.

It was dark, velvet curtains, a queen sized bed with maroon bedsheets. Jeongguk looked at
Taehyung sheepishly. "I don't really have clothes to sleep in."

"I'll get you mine. I know you like being in my clothes, don't you?" Taehyung teased, and
Jeongguk really couldn't say no to that. Taehyung left to go get clothes, and Jeongguk took the time
to look around the room.

Old books, old records, old clothes. All rather dusty. Jeongguk gazed his eyes down them, and then
his eyes fell upon a photograph. He picked it up. It was grainy and black and white. A picture of
Taehyung, looking less broad and intimidating than he does now. No, his smile was soft and boxy,
and his hair was curly. He had his arm around Veronica's waist, Veronica stood beside him. Her
hair shorter, smiling really widely like Jeongguk had never seen before.

"Here." Taehyung walked in, holding a shirt. "Couldn't find pajamas."

"I-I can't just wear your shirt, Taehyung," Jeongguk said, flabbergasted.

"Nonsense. Of course, you can. And you will." Taehyung said, and he had his glass in his hand.
Jeongguk noticed now that his glass was empty already.

"Will you sleep now as well?" Jeongguk asked, looking at the older man.

"I'll probably be downstairs for a while. Can't really sleep too well these days." Taehyung said,
looking away, an uneasiness in his words that Jeongguk would probably scan over if he hadn't
known Taehyung so well. Never show fear to the other side, huh?

"Don't drink more," Jeongguk said softly.

Taehyung stood by the doorway and then turned to give him a small smile. "Don't worry about me,
Jeongguk. Get some sleep." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk hesitated but nodded nonetheless.

Jeongguk went to sleep in the bed, and Taehyung stayed downstairs for three more hours, listening
to old jazz and drinking another glass of whiskey.

**
 Chapter 25
Chapter Notes

hello, uh. im really sorry i havent updated for a long time despite still continuing it on
wattpad. i was getting harassed by a user on this site and just felt anxious coming on
here and felt nervous to upload anything, but now that the fic is finished, i will be
updating all the chapters :)

also : this chapter has abuse, alcohol intake, slapping, verbal fights, etc. please don't
read if you're uncomfortable

**

The situation was... vexatious to say the least.

It had been a week. There was an unpleasant aura in the house. The sound of Veronica wretching
her stomach by vomiting into the toilet bowl was heard every morning. Jeongguk would always
make breakfast that Veronica would never eat- instead, she'd make something on her own.
Taehyung would linger behind, smile at Veronica, smile at Jeongguk, and then have a glass of
whiskey far too early in the day.

One particular Friday morning, Jeongguk stopped by the doorway to Taehyung's study, seeing him
with his head against the desk, hand around an empty glass.

"Taehyung," Jeongguk said softly, and Taehyung flinched at his voice and picked his head up. He
blinked a few times, adjusting his eyes to the light, and then landed them on Jeongguk. Taehyung
smiled.

"Hello, love. Shouldn't you have left for your classes yet?" Taehyung asked, groggy.

Jeongguk's eyebrows were slightly furrowed, hands wringing together in a nervous gesture. "The
lecturer's fallen ill, so I don't have to attend," Jeongguk said, and then put his hand on Taehyung's
shoulder, an unconscious movement. "Are you alright?"

"I'm- I'm fine. Perfectly mellow, darling." Taehyung said, and then got up from his seat and
stumbled forward at the suddenness. Jeongguk grabbed him by his sides, eyes widening.

"Taehyung-" Jeongguk began, and Taehyung put his hands on Jeongguk's chest, chuckling.

"I'm fine-" Taehyung repeated, and tried pushing Jeongguk off.

"You're drunk, Taehyung- i-it's 10 in the morning-"

"I said I'm fine," Taehyung growled lowly, and Jeongguk feet faltered backward. Jeongguk looked
at him with worry, and Taehyung walked past him, out of the study. Jeongguk turned and followed
him.

"You really shouldn't be drinking so much, Taehyung," Jeongguk began feebly, watching
Taehyung grab a bottle roughly and pour its contents into the whiskey glass. "Not- not now. Not
when Veronica's pregnant-"

"She is, isn't she? She's very much pregnant. I saw it last night. A little bump on her stomach. Our
child, that's-" Taehyung chuckled, gripping his glass tighter, a wicked smile on his face as he took
a sip, and then let go. "That's our child."

"Taehyung-" Jeongguk walked over to him. Jeongguk grabbed the glass out of his hand, putting it
back down on the table. "If you keep doing this, it'll get worse. For you, for Veronica, for your
child-"

"I know what I'm fucking doing, Jeongguk," Taehyung rasped, and then gripped his chin, the
darkness in his eyes lingering away at the sight of Jeongguk. Taehyung tilted his head. "You're
quite beautiful."

Jeongguk pushed him off. "Eat some food and go to work. You'll get fired if you keep showing up
to work off your feet like this."

"Don't lecture me." Taehyung snickered, walking past him. Veronica walked down the steps,
dressed in her work clothes. She looked at Taehyung as he walked up the stairs and into their
bedroom, shutting the door harshly. Veronica looked at Jeongguk.

Jeongguk kept quiet, looking away. Taehyung returned a minute later, dressed in his work clothes.
He walked past Veronica and Jeongguk, out of the house. Veronica let out a slight sigh and
followed, as they'd take the car to work together. Jeongguk stayed at his home, tethered.

To ease his mind, he wore a coat and walked out of the house for a walk. Frankly, he hadn't been
out much besides for classes and work. In fear of seeing Rosie. She was always so innocent,
harmless, but now the thought of her sent shivers down Jeongguk's spine.

Jeongguk walked a long way until he reached the bar. He walked in, the room now a familiar place
to him. Jeongguk smiled when he saw Mark, the bartender, already sitting around. He wasn't
working, but he lived above the bar, so he was probably just waiting around.

"Moonflower," Mark said with a grin, and Jeongguk felt the man squeeze his waist in a hug. "How
are you? Haven't seen you for ages!"

"You heard what happened last time?" Jeongguk asked, and Mark's face shadowed, nodding. "Yes,
those wretched policemen... I swear, they never raid this place because doing so doesn't change the
fact that we're still homosexual. " Mark chuckled.

"It was frightening. I've never been to- to prison, or anything of the sorts before. Especially for
something like this. I must admit, it made me anxious to come here. But I wanted to come meet
Yoongi. Is he here?" Jeongguk asked, but the question answered itself.

The door of his green room opened. "Just leave then!" Yoongi's voice shouted. Jeongguk turned
around to see what was going on.

His eyes widened when he saw that policeman from that day, Hoseok, with his black hair and
annoyed gaze, walk out of his room. Hoseok had a lit cigarette in his mouth, and upon seeing
Jeongguk, he pulled his newsboy cap down a bit and walked out of the bar, sending Mark a look.

Yoongi walked out of the room, tears in his eyes. He walked to the bar and sat down on one of the
stools, hands against his face. He breathed out a cry. Mark walked up to him.

"Why do you keep letting him in?" Mark asked gently, hand on his back.

"I don't know," Yoongi whispered weakly, fingers gripping at strands of his own hair.

"Yoongi," Jeongguk voiced, and Yoongi looked up. Yoongi sniffled, hadn't realized the younger
was here. Yoongi got off the stool.

"Oh buttercup, you're alright," Yoongi said in relief, wrapping him in a hug. Jeongguk's eyes
turned big in surprise, and he hugged him back rather quickly, chin on his shoulder.

"When you didn't return after that night, I thought- I thought you might've given up. But you
haven't. You haven't lost hope, have you? We have to persevere, Jeongguk, men like you and me.
We must." Yoongi said, squeezing him tightly. Jeongguk nodded.

"We must," Jeongguk repeated. "I'm sorry for not returning for a while. I'm afraid I got held up in a
bit of a situation," Jeongguk said, and Yoongi looked at him.

They sat down, got two glasses of rum, and talked. Jeongguk first. "It's odd, y'know. Living in the
same house as the man whom I let deflower me and the woman who's husband I took. It feels so
wrong, yet somehow, Veronica isn't my biggest problem." Jeongguk chuckled, trailing.

"Have you spoken with your wife?" Yoongi asked.

"Um... not really. I'm a bit afraid." Jeongguk admitted. "She-she said I should burn in hell."

"That's what everyone says." Yoongi laughed weakly. "But if hell will be full of men who love
men, then it doesn't sound too bad," Yoongi said, and Jeongguk burst into giggles. "We could
perform there too."

"Perform, yes indeed. Speaking of; I-I was hoping I could swing by sometime? Perform again?"
Jeongguk asked, and a slight flush flickered on his cheeks upon seeing Yoongi smile proudly.

"You're enjoying it, aren't you?"

"Immensely. Being on stage, wearing a dress, with my hair all done, with my face full of powder- I
feel destined." Jeongguk said, eyes glittering.

"You're a reckoning, Moonflower," Yoongi said in a whisper. Jeongguk looked at him with slight
confusion but didn't stop to question his words.

"Say. That policeman. He's... he's your lover?" Jeongguk asked.

Yoongi scoffed. "Lover." He said in disgust. "More like my demise."

Yoongi was quiet for a few seconds. He took a sip of his rum and then continued. "I met Hoseok
six years ago. I was new to becoming a drag queen then," Yoongi snickered, shaking his head.
"He'd always been a policeman. One day the police raided this old bar I used to work at. Arrested
all of us. Hoseok took me in his car- but-but he never took me to prison. Began chatting me up.
And-" Yoongi bit his lip. "I l-like to pretend as if... I let him do the things he did to me that night
because I didn't want to go to prison. I just d-don't want to admit that... he was beautiful. I was so
taken in by him."

Jeongguk looked at him cautiously. Yoongi looked down. "I'm pathetic to be s-so in love with
him,"

"We're all a little pathetic, aren't we?" Jeongguk asked, and Yoongi looked at him, eyes teary. "I'm
in love with a man who's having a child. My god, we truly are pathetic."

Yoongi started laughing. Jeongguk did too. Once their giggles died down, Jeongguk cleared his
throat. "That night. I'm sorry for being so reckless. I got excited."

"It's alright, buttercup. We learn, don't we? It's happened to the best of us. I was quite reckless that
night too, letting myself go ahead with you like that. You're rather irresistible, I must admit."
Yoongi said, and Jeongguk blushed.

"R-really?" Jeongguk squeaked.

"I mean, it's a harmless fantasy, really. I'm usually the one that takes it- but there's something about
you which makes me want to fuck you over a desk. Do you get what I mean?"

Jeongguk covered his face with his hands, blushing rather hard. Mark shouted from the back,
something about telling Yoongi to stop ruining Jeongguk's innocence.

Jeongguk stayed there for a few more hours, talking to Mark and Yoongi, giggling over silliest of
things. Mark cooked some Italian for the three of them, and they ate it up gratefully. After that,
Jeongguk went back to Taehyung and Veronica's home.

He felt like an uninvited guest.

Veronica never said anything rude to him, not directly, but her gestures, her movement, her looks,
and her expressions made it clear that Jeongguk's presence was not welcome. Jeongguk didn't
blame her, really.

Jeongguk stepped into the house, glad to find it empty. He decided to show his kindness by
cleaning up the house, dusting the floors and tables. The sun had set, thus Veronica and Taehyung
should be returning from work in an hour or so.

However, the doorbell rang many times, startling Jeongguk. Who was there? Neither resident had
informed Jeongguk of the occurring of a random stranger.

Jeongguk walked to the door fearfully and then opened the door. Once he did, he gasped.

It was Jackson. He looked troubled, anxious. His arm was around Taehyung's waist, holding him
up. Jeongguk looked at Taehyung with discomfort. The man's hair was a mess, tie loose, jacket off.
He looked half asleep and smelt reeked of alcohol.

"Jeongguk- oh thank goodness. I was told by his assistant to take him back home. He- he kept
drinking at work, causing a ruckus-"

Jeongguk put his hands on Taehyung's arms, frightened at his appearance. Jackson gulped
nervously when Taehyung started laughing.

"Do you ever shut the fuck up, Jackson?" Taehyung slurred, words low. Jeongguk gave Jackson an
apologetic look because Jackson looked a bit upset by this situation.
"I-I'm very sorry. Thank you for helping. I-I think you should go get Veronica from-from work-"
Jeongguk said, holding onto Taehyung who couldn't even stand on his own feet. Jackson nodded
apprehensively.

Taehyung slipped out of his hold and fell to the floor. Jeongguk looked embarrassed and taken
aback when Taehyung began laughing, gripping the carpet, unable to lift his head off the floor.
Jackson gulped, looking at Jeongguk unsurely.

"H-he's fine, I'll-I'll take care of him-" Jeongguk said quickly, kneeling in front of him. Jeongguk
helped him up. "Taehyung. Taehyung, just-just calm down. Shush-" Jeongguk tried, but Taehyung
grabbed his wrists, smirking up at him droopily.

"Awww, you-you gonna take care of m-me, love? Gonna let me f-fuck you again, are you? Show
me your ass, c'mon-" Taehyung slurred- and then grabbed his ass. Jeongguk's cheeks flushed,
more of shame at Taehyung's actions and words than anything.

"Sir- are- are you sure? I can stay and help if you want-" Jackson said, and Jeongguk put his hands
on Taehyung's arms to pull them away from his behind. Jeongguk nodded at Jackson, humiliating.

"Y-yes, please, you can go," Jeongguk said quickly, and Jackson nodded and walked out, closing
the door.

"Finally," Taehyung growled, and then sloppily began kissing his neck. Jeongguk pushed him off
with force and then got up from the floor. Jeongguk tried helping him up, but Taehyung fell face
forward to Jeongguk's crotch and then began laughing loudly.

"L-lemme have your cock in my mouth, Gg-gguk. C'mon-" Taehyung said, and Jeongguk moved
away from him, his heart pacing fast in fear. He felt revulsion and fear looking at Taehyung like
this.

"T-Taehyung please, just- j-just get up-" Jeongguk said weakly, not knowing how to take care of
him, not knowing what to do. Jeongguk helped him stand up, but Taehyung stumbled again, and
then moved to the side and hunched forward.

Taehyung threw up on the floor. Jeongguk widened his eyes, then looked away in disgust, in
burning shame. Taehyung gripped onto Jeongguk's shirt, finished, but still hunched over.

"Taehyung..." Jeongguk whispered, and Taehyung breathed heavily, standing up straight. Jeongguk
sat him down on the sofa and went into the kitchen to get water for him. Jeongguk walked back to
him and saw his head hung low. Jeongguk reached it up and pressed the rim of the glass against his
lips.

"Drink it please-" Jeongguk said, and Taehyung opened his mouth. Jeongguk tipped the glass into
his mouth, and Taehyung took a few sips. Taehyung put his hand over Jeongguk's on the glass and
then forced it forward until the water spilled out and onto his shirt and trousers.

Taehyung began laughing. Jeongguk took the glass away from him. He took a napkin and wiped
Taehyung's unkempt mouth, and then his shirt, and then his trousers. Jeongguk didn't say anything.
Taehyung grabbed Jeongguk's wrist and then jerked it, so Jeongguk's hand touched Taehyung's
clothed cock.

"Taehyung-" Jeongguk whispered, pulling his hand away. Taehyung leaned away from him,
resting his head back against the couch. Jeongguk got up from the couch and walked to get a mop.

Jeongguk cleaned the vomit off the floor, tears prickling in his eyes. He then washed the mop as
well, a horrid feeling creeping up his stomach. Jeongguk walked into the living room and saw
Taehyung.

He saw Taehyung by the bar table, pouring more alcohol into a glass, filling it till the brim.
Jeongguk gasped out. "Stop it! W-what is wrong with you? Stop it Taehyung, j-just stop!"
Jeongguk snapped, pushing him. "You c-can't just keep doing this-"

"I'm fine," Taehyung slurred and then stepped forward to grab his glass. Jeongguk grabbed his
wrists to stop him, but in doing so, the glass tipped and fell to the floor, crashing and breaking into
pieces. The alcohol spilled onto the floor.

Taehyung pushed Jeongguk roughly, and the younger stumbled back, almost falling. "I s-said I'm
fine! Do you not hear me? I'm p-perfectly fine!" Taehyung shouted, his hands shaking.

Jeongguk's eyes widened as Taehyung fell to the floor, gasping out for breath, his eyes filling with
tears. "I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm fine." Taehyung repeated to himself, voice shaking.

"Taehyung," Jeongguk voiced faintly. Taehyung looked away from him, grabbing a piece of
broken glass. Jeongguk sat down in front of him. "D-don't hold that-"

"I"m f-fine," Taehyung said again, voice bubbling. "I'm-" Taehyung shoulders stilled, and then he
started crying. Burst into tears, into loud, childlike sobs.

Jeongguk reached forward, wrapping his arms around him, pulling him close. Taehyung continued
crying, his whole body shaking. Jeongguk closed his eyes, letting Taehyung practically scream in
sobs into his chest. He just held him.

They sat there for a long time, Taehyung crying out his remains into Jeongguk until he couldn't
anymore. Until he could only whimper and sniffle, nothing left in the man any longer.

Jeongguk picked Taehyung up in his arms, the man half asleep, and carried him into his bedroom.
Jeongguk laid Taehyung down onto the bed, draped the blanket on top of him, closed the light, and
walked out of the bedroom.

Veronica returned soon after. "Where is he?" She asked, eyes darkened. Jackson must've told her
what happened.

"He's sleeping. He's not in the state to talk right now, Veronica." Jeongguk said, and Veronica eyed
him. She looked around and then saw the broken glass on the floor, the alcohol drying on the floor.
She also noticed how Jeongguk had tear stains on his face.

"Did he hurt you?" Veronica asked, bitter.

"N-no. He just... he's not alright." Jeongguk said feebly.

"What is this stench? Did he throw up?" Veronica asked, eyebrows furrowing.

Jeongguk looked down. "I-I took care of it."

"You shouldn't have to. He's a grown man who's going to have a child. He shouldn't be coming
back from work drunk." Veronica growled and then walked past Jeongguk and up the stairs.
Jeongguk turned around, eyes wide. He followed her.

"Veronica, don't do anything-" Jeongguk began hastily. She walked into the bedroom.
"Taehyung." Veronica voiced, and Taehyung stirred in his sleep. "Taehyung!" Veronica shouted.
Taehyung recoiled and then opened his eyes. He looked at her, sitting up suddenly.

"Veronica," Taehyung let out groggily, looking a bit soberer now. Veronica looked at him with
wide, darkened, angered eyes. Taehyung didn't say anything. Jeongguk stood by the door.

Veronica slapped Taehyung across the face. Jeongguk flinched, hiding behind the wall.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?!" Veronica shouted. "Are you trying to lose your job? Your
sanity? Your life? Is that what you're trying to fucking do?"

"I-I'm sorry,"

"Sorry? Is that all you have to say?! Look at everyone around you! Jackson, poor Jackson, his wife
is pregnant, he works a low-income job, he has to work till late at night and help his stupid fucking
boss. Had to bring you in as if you were a dog, Taehyung! I've been in classes since early morning,
grading papers after papers, throwing up violently, my head hurt all day- and I have to rush home
because I hear my husband has gotten himself drunk at work? Do you know how humiliating it
is??"

Jeongguk stood behind the wall, unable to see their faces. "What about Jeongguk? Do you not care
for him, at least? He's getting told to commit suicide by his own wife, got arrested, got harassed.
And he had to take care of you as if you were a fucking child, Taehyung. Clean you up, put you to
bed. He's watching the man he's in love with ruin himself and drink himself to fucking death!"
Veronica shouted. Jeongguk's eyes widened, stomach coiled.

There was a small silence. Jeongguk heard a sniffle and then realized Taehyung was sobbing. "I'm
sorry," Taehyung repeated, words so soft Jeongguk could barely hear them.

"You're fucking helpless. You have it best out of all of us, Taehyung. You're the one with the fancy
job. With the fancy title. You're the one who remains the perfect man. Yet you're the fucking
weakest out of all of us."

Jeongguk stood completely still, and then heard voices, meaning Veronica was leaving the
bedroom. Jeongguk darted past to ensure it didn't seem as if he was eavesdropping. Veronica
walked out, looking a bit shaken. "I'll stay at my cousin's tonight. Sorry." Veronica whispered the
last part and then walked out of the house.

Jeongguk stood still as the front door closed. Jeongguk looked into the bedroom and saw Taehyung
standing by the window, gripping the ledge, looking outside. Jeongguk walked up to him.

Jeongguk put his hand on Taehyung's shoulder, and he saw how the older tensed, but let Jeongguk
place it there.

"I'm sorry." Taehyung breathed out, tears fresh in his eyes, mouth dry.

"I know you are," Jeongguk said, and tears went down Taehyung's cheeks.

"I'm s-so weak," Taehyung whispered. "So disgusting. I'm sorry. I'm sorry." Taehyung kept saying
the same words again and again. Jeongguk went closer to him and then shook his head, grabbing
Taehyung's trembling hand.

"Everyone has low moments," Jeongguk said, tracing his thumb over Taehyung's hand. He looked
up at Taehyung. That man he knew once, the glorious, perfect, manliest man was now gone.
Taehyung looked vulnerable, pale, eyes with tears and throat hoarse.
"I'm sorry," Taehyung said again, and Jeongguk squeezed his hands to quieten him. Taehyung
began crying. "Y-you're ashamed o-of me."

"Don't cry again, love," Jeongguk whispered, walking forward and bringing Taehyung's hands up
so they'd cup Jeongguk's cheeks. "You'll make me cry,"

Taehyung began crying louder. "I-I'm not a man. You- you're a man." Taehyung whispered.
Jeongguk blinked his big eyes. "You're s-strong, and you're brave, and y-you continue to fight even
though the whole world's against you. And look at me." Taehyung closed his eyes, letting his tears
slip past. "I'm so f-fucking weak."

Jeongguk hugged him tightly. But he couldn't say anything to him. Taehyung was right.
Taehyung was weak, devastatingly.

"It's alright. You'll grow strong again. A strong, willing father. One who'll love and raise his
beautiful child." Jeongguk soothed, pressing their foreheads together. "Just stop drinking, stop
weakening yourself."

Taehyung nodded, hugging Jeongguk back tightly. Jeongguk whispered more soothing words into
his ear. Taehyung grew sleepy, lying his head against his shoulder.

Jeongguk led him to the bed. Taehyung lay down, but then he grabbed Jeongguk and pulled him
into the bed as well. "Stay. Please." Taehyung whispered.

"Only for tonight," Jeongguk replied, and then curled into Taehyung, letting Taehyung wrap his
arms around Jeongguk. They held each other all night.

**
 Chapter 26

**

"Good morning," A soft mellow voice came, waking Taehyung up from his somber sleep.
Taehyung blinked his eyes to adjust for the sunlight poured in from the tall pane windows. The
velvet curtains were drawn, and summer had finally settled arrived in London.

Taehyung saw Jeongguk, holding a tray with two cups of tea sitting on them. Jeongguk smiled at
Taehyung and then sat down on the bed beside him. "I made some tea for you, love," Jeongguk
said gently and then brought his hand forward to card his fingers through Taehyung's golden hair.
"How are you?"

"I've been better," Taehyung replied groggily, sitting up. Jeongguk pressed a chaste kiss to his
cheek, but the remembrance of their parting struck him like lightning and beckoned him to pull
away in an instant.

Taehyung picked up the cup of tea, but Jeongguk noticed how his lean fingers were trembling.
Jeongguk put his hands onto Taehyung's. "You're shaking."

"It's c-cold," Taehyung said admittingly, and Jeongguk tilted his head because the weather had
been steadily warmer each new day. Jeongguk put his hand against Taehyung's cheek.

"Your skin is hot... you've got a fever, I reckon." Jeongguk sighed, placing the tray down and
getting up from the bed.

"Jeongguk," Taehyung gulped. "Don't fret over me, love. Please. I'm alright. You've-you've done
enough..."

"I'll just get you some honey to put into your tea-" Jeongguk began, but Taehyung shook his head.

"Don't. Just sit by me. Your presence is enough of a remedy." Taehyung said faintly. Jeongguk
walked back to the older man, sitting down beside him. Jeongguk brought forward the cup of tea,
holding it to Taehyung's mouth. Taehyung looked away, taking a few sips of it.

"It's pathetic. Emasculating." Taehyung muttered. "I can't even hold my head up."

"Of course you can. You're just sick. It's probably the- the changing weather." Jeongguk said. Or
the fact that you've been unhinged with your drinking, Jeongguk thought but didn't voice.

"You always take care of me," Taehyung said. "You're too giving."

"That tends to happen when you're in love with someone. Selflessness. It's a flaw as much as a
quality." Jeongguk chuckled, and his cheeks flickered red when Taehyung smiled fondly.

"In love with someone," Taehyung whispered. Jeongguk picked up his cup of tea and took a few
sips. "That's endearing."

"Must you not tease me? It's already humiliating, being in love. Such a crucifying thing." Jeongguk
tsked, and then put the cup down. "It frees you or binds you. Or in my case, it does both."
They finished drinking the tea, talking in hushed voices. Jeongguk got up to keep the tray back in
the kitchen and make breakfast for the two of them. He didn't know if Veronica was going to come
back any time soon, but considering her abysmal attitude before her departure, Jeongguk doesn't
think it'll be any time soon.

"I'll make you breakfast. Lay here, you're in no condition to go to work today." Jeongguk said to
him, soft. Jeongguk smiled at Taehyung when he sighed.

"I don't like being taken care of,"

"Oh, hush." Jeongguk kissed his temple. "You can do that for me, can't you?"

"Alright, I suppose so."

Jeongguk walked down to place the teacups and tray in the sink, and then get to work with
breakfast. Jeongguk made some eggs, humming a tune to himself that he's meant to sing at the club
tonight. Should he go? Taehyung might need him.

But being away from the club and not performing for so long made Jeongguk's heart long for it.
He'd become attached to Moonflower now, become attached to that other life. He didn't know how
long it'd last. How long he'd be able to continue. But currently, the thought of parting made him
upset.

Jeongguk took breakfast up to Taehyung's bedroom. Taehyung looked half dead. He sat up and ate
the food silently. Jeongguk smiled at him because he ate by pouting his lips a little bit, almost
endearing.

"You know," Jeongguk began hesitantly. "If-if we continued what we... had. I wouldn't mind- um-
doing things to you that you do to me." Jeongguk said, hushed.

Taehyung stopped eating and arched his eyebrow. "You want to fuck me?"

"N-no- I mean-" Jeongguk blushed furiously. "Kind of... it's nice to take care of you. I wouldn't
mind doing it in bed as well." Jeongguk said, looking away.

Jeongguk looked up, and suddenly Taehyung was quite close to him, faces inches apart. Taehyung
eyed him, and the gesture only made Jeongguk blush more. Taehyung smirked. "Let's not get
ahead of ourselves, love."

Jeongguk gulped, feeling a flutter in his stomach. Taehyung was effortlessly handsome, even when
sick. His skin was flushed and voice was deeper because of his illness, and Jeongguk might be
messed in the head because it only made Jeongguk feel more attracted to the older man. The
thought of taking care of Taehyung went flying out the window. Jeongguk wanted Taehyung to pin
him down and do things to him.

"R-right." Jeongguk settled for and saw as Taehyung chuckled, leaning back. He continued eating,
looking at Jeongguk while doing so. Jeongguk put his hand forward.

"Taehyung, you won't drink anymore, will you? I've never seen Veronica look so stressed. I know
she-she shouldn't have hurt you last night by slapping you- but what she said made sense. I don't
want you to hurt yourself or others around you."

"I know, darling. I've been absolutely reckless. I don't like when she hits me, b-but I think I needed
to get my mind straightened out. I'm going to be a father soon, a-as in... have a baby, I can't be so
out of place." Taehyung murmured.
"A baby. It'll be a beautiful baby, I know it. With your and Veronica's faces put together."
Jeongguk giggled. "Joan if a girl, no? That's a pretty name. I hope you have a daughter, for your
sake."

Taehyung was looking down. Jeongguk's smile faltered when Taehyung didn't return the same
enthusiasm. Jeongguk scooted closer to the man and lifted his chin up a little to look at him.
Taehyung looked nervous, close to tears.

"I don't w-want to have a child." Taehyung breathed out, and Jeongguk stilled. "Not anymore."

"Taehyung," Jeongguk gulped. "You mustn't say that. You're being ludicrous. Of course you want
this child. You're looking at from the wrong perspective."

"How am I going to do any-anything? Without you?" Taehyung looked away. "The past few
months the only reason I've been able to get out of bed is- is because I knew I'd see your face soon.
I knew I'd have you in my arms. I knew I'd get to see you s-smile, and-" Taehyung took a deep
breath. "I can't live without you."

"Don't say that." Jeongguk closed his eyes, wondering when everything took such a turn. When
Taehyung's dependency on him became stronger than Jeongguk's dependency on Taehyung. When
Taehyung became so much weaker than Jeongguk.

Or perhaps it never took a turn. Jeongguk was just blind to see it. Taehyung had always been a
weak man hiding behind a facade of confidence.

"Don't say you won't be able to live without me. You'll be absolutely fine without me. You've gone
27 years already, haven't you?" Jeongguk smiled. "I'm just a sensation, Taehyung. Momentary.
We'll fade away. Only remember each other in the future, when our lives have moved forward."

"I don't want that to happen," Taehyung whispered.

"Me neither. But you're the one who told me to be realistic."

Taehyung nodded, bringing his hand forward to wrap them with Jeongguk's. Jeongguk squeezed
his bigger hand, and they both sat in silence for a little while, enjoying one another's company.

"Are you feeling better now?"

Veronica looked up from where she was seated on the sofa, a warm cup of tea in her hands. She
nodded. "Yes, I apologize for barging in like this at such an ungodly hour."

"That's alright," Rosie said gently, sitting down beside her. "Last time we talked I was a bit...
erratic."

"I'm glad you agree." Veronica chuckled, taking a sip of her tea.

"It was just sudden. And, honestly, I can't talk about this to anyone. It's... humiliating, you know? It
makes me think it's my fault. Was there something wrong with me? As a woman? That made him
crave men?" Rosie said, hushed.
"I know how you feel. I can't talk about this to anyone either. It's a real mess we're in, Rosie. But it
isn't any better for the two of them. Jeongguk... he's a nice man." Veronica nodded.

Rosie scoffed to herself, looking away. "Not much of a man anymore."

"Rosie," Veronica tsked.

"You can't blame me for being upset by this, Veronica! Isn't this what we're taught? A man mustn't
lie with another man. It's a sin! He-he will go to hell! Doesn't that bother anyone in the slightest?!"
Rosie cried out loud.

"No one's certain about what happens when we die. It isn't wrong to take risks, to take chances.
Wouldn't you rather Jeongguk live a happy life now rather than live a deceitful life?" Veronica
asked, and Rosie pursed her lips.

"No."

"....Oh. Well then. He's at my house now, as you might know. He's afraid of coming back home.
Don't do that to him, Rosie. He still loves you, you know? Just not like a lover, but as a friend, he
does." Veronica consoled, but Rosie got up from the sofa before Veronica could place a soothing
hand on her knee.

"It's so easy for you to say this, Veronica." Rosie walked towards the window. "You're the big
woman. The one with the job. The one with the money. The one who can drive. Who smokes. Who
drinks. Who wears trousers and doesn't care what her husband thinks. It's always been easy for
you." Rosie muttered.

"Easy?" Veronica arched her eyebrow. "Are you joking? Do you know how hard it's been to be
where I am as a woman? I get paid half of what Taehyung does, despite doing an honorary job. It
took years to be known as Veronica Kim, and not Taehyung's wife. It took years for men to respect
me. And they still don't. So if you think I've had it easy, then you don't know a thing."

Rosie stilled. She turned around, hands fiddling with one another. "I-I'm sorry. I got angry."

Veronica leaned against the sofa. "Jeongguk says he wants a divorce."

Rosie dropped her head down, tears reaching her green eyes. "W-why?" Rosie's shoulders began
shaking as tears rushed down her eyes. "W-what did I do wrong?"

"It's nothing you did, Rosie. It's how he's been since birth. He's always liked men, he just didn't
know it. How would you feel if you were-were forced to be married to a woman? But inside, you
liked men?"

"T-that- that doesn't make sense! Why does he want a divorce? What does he think he's going to
do? Be with Taehyung? Taehyung and you are having a child. God, doesn't he know that
Taehyung doesn't care about him?" Rosie snapped.

Veronica sighed. "Taehyung does care. A lot. But... the circumstances are all wrong."

Rosie walked forward and sat down beside Veronica. "I hate Jeongguk. I hate that he likes men, it's
disgusting. It makes me want to vomit."

"Don't say such things. You don't feel that way. You think you feel that way because that's what
everyone around you wants you to feel. There's nothing wrong with a man liking a-"
"Have you gone mad as well? Do I need to call a doctor on all three of you?" Rosie said to her,
eyebrows knitted. Veronica sighed, looking away.

"Nevermind."

There was silence, the curtains moving from the summer breeze coming in from outside. Rosie
sniffled, picking on the skin around her nails, a nervous habit. Veronica took another sip of her tea
and then set the cup down.

"Did they..." Rosie asked after a bit. "Did they have sex?"

"Yes," Veronica replied.

Rosie grimaced, shuddering. There was a bit more silence. Rosie gulped. "Do you know..... which
one of them..... during the sex..... was the girl?"

Veronica stilled. She looked at him. "What?"

"I-I'm just curious! I never even knew two men could-could do such things-!" Rosie said, hand
coming up against her mouth to cover it, looking horrified.

Veronica gulped. "I didn't think about that. But... I assume Jeongguk."

"J-Jeongguk?"

"I assume Jeongguk was the man during sex. Taehyung seems like he'd like it up his arse."

"WHAT?!"

"I'm kidding." Veronica chuckled. Rosie looked scandalized. "You need to be a little lighthearted
sometimes, Rosie. It helps diffuse these sort of situations."

"I can't. I don't understand how you're taking it so lightly. You're the perpetrator, you know that?
You're making it worse by letting Jeongguk stay in your house. Taehyung and he are sick and will
continue to be so if you let them stay close. They need help." Rosie spat. "Besides. Will you let this
continue after your child is born? Taehyung won't want you ever again. He'll want Jeongguk. He
probably doesn't even want the child to be born-"

"Rosie!" Veronica shouted. "Shut the fuck up!" Veronica stood up from the sofa, enraged, eyes
darkened. She moved away from the couch. "God. No wonder Jeongguk wants to divorce you."

Veronica looked out the window, breathing heavily. She needed.... she needed a drink. But she
couldn't. It was itching her, to smoke, to drink, to do anything. To sleep with a man. But she
couldn't do any. Not when she had a greater liability in her stomach. Rosie's words were digging
through her brain, terrorizing her. It made her writhe with anger and... guilt.

Because Rosie's words weren't entirely wrong. Veronica was the perpetrator.

"Moonflower!" Yoongi's voice came. "Come on! You're already 8 minutes late. Are you done with
your makeup?"
"Yes! It's just- this- this eyelash isn't sticking-!" Jeongguk cried, and Yoongi rolled his eyes,
dressed in full drag. Today was Friday. The club was filled with men, ranging from younger to
much older.

Word had spread across London. A new queen had surfaced in a club downtown, and she
was beautiful. Moonflower. Young, gorgeous, and sang like an angel. People were dying to watch
her. Not only was this club the stage of the infamous Champagne Gloss, but also, the new beauty
Moonflower.

The club was filled tonight. Numerous men and women as well, gay women with their lovers,
wearing trousers and shirts and looking happier than could be.

"God, you're hopeless sometimes. Everyone's waiting for you. I already performed 5 songs, I'm
knackered." Yoongi helped put the eyelash on Jeongguk's eyelash with ease. Jeongguk blinked his
big eyes at the mirror and then gave Yoongi a pearly smile.

"Thank you. I'll go to perform now." Jeongguk got up from the seat, his corset especially tight
today. His waist was already so small and now it looked much smaller. He wore a short pink gown
with a big white belt on it.

Yoongi had been telling Jeongguk to find his own 'style'. Yoongi's style was very 20's, he'd made
that avidly clear with his black flapper dresses and thin eyebrows. So in a search for inspiration,
Jeongguk decided he adored doll-like clothing which included short pastel colored poofy dresses
and belts. It was cute.

Jeongguk walked out of the green room, walking down the short dark hallway and then gripping
onto the red curtains. He pushed them aside and smiled like he always does as the crowd
applauded.

They cheered for Moonflower as she sauntered onto the stage, cute and shy. Jeongguk felt it was
fitting for Moonflower to be a shy, more gentle woman, rather the opposite
of Champagne. Jeongguk grabbed the microphone and then began singing.

He sang some Elvis Presley, some Frank Sinatra, some Paul Anka, but made it more feminine
sounding, more soft, more breathy. He twirled and winked at the audience while doing so, and then
giggling to himself because it was all rather silly. He couldn't be serious nor flirtatious, so being
endearing and delicate is what he went with.

"In other words, I love you." Jeongguk finished singing Fly Me To The Moon and then smiled
widely as the audience clapped for him. Some threw money on stage, which was a way of
expressing their content with what he was doing.

Jeongguk took a step back, looking at everyone. "Hello. I'm Moonflower." Jeongguk said into the
microphone, and the audience cheered for him, almost cooing. Jeongguk giggled. "I'm a little shy if
I'm honest. Thank you for giving me a good time."

"Anyday, princess!" A man from the audience hollered, and Jeongguk giggled again.

"To end my performance, I'll be singing some Cinderella." Jeongguk batted his long lashes, and
then twirled around, showing his back to the audience. Everyone quietened down. Jeongguk took a
deep breath and then turned back around.

"Mmmm," Jeongguk began, looking over the audience. Everyone was looking up at him, standing
on that stage. The spotlight was on him. All he could see were heads. "So this is love," Jeongguk
began singing gently. Men and women both, lined up across the bar, standing askew on the floor,
holding each other, swaying. "So this is what makes life divine,"

"I'm all aglow and now I know," Jeongguk sang, enjoying the beauty of what was in front of him,
pure love. "The key to our heaven is-" Jeongguk froze. His eyes widened. "M-mine..."

Taehyung was standing against the bar, leaning back onto it, looking at him with a serious
expression. Jeongguk very much stilled. He felt like he couldn't move.

The audience must've thought the long pause meant he was finished because they burst out in
applause. Jeongguk couldn't even thank everyone nor collect the money. He'd locked eyes with
Taehyung for too long. Jeongguk turned around and ran off stage.

Jeongguk ran into the green room. Yoongi wasn't there. Jeongguk felt like crying. He didn't know
why. But for so long, his life in the club and life outside had been separate. Now they were
melding. Taehyung saw him.

The door of the greenroom opened. Jeongguk stood in the middle of the room and closed his eyes
tightly, fists by his side. The door closed. A sign followed. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Jeongguk turned around, looking down. "I-I don't know. It's p-private."

"Private?" Taehyung asked, hands in his pocket. "You told me to go to sleep and left to go perform
here. I was worried sick when I woke up and found you gone."

"I didn't think you'd wake up. Are you f-feeling better now?"

"Much," Taehyung said, walking closer to him. "Jeongguk, look at me."

Jeongguk looked up at Taehyung finally, feeling smaller in his gaze. Taehyung looked at him. His
long fake lashes, heavy eyeshadow, lots of blush, freckles drawn on, big pink lips, long blonde
hair, little pink dress. "Moonflower," Taehyung whispered. "That's what you call yourself?"

"Yes." Jeongguk bit his lip, fiddling with his fingers. "Why did you come here?"

"I assumed you'd be here. Considering you've been coming here quite often, haven't you? I just
didn't think you'd be on stage singing, dressed as a woman." Taehyung eyed him head to toe.

"I'm sorry." Jeongguk squeaked, closing his eyes. "I enjoy doing this. It's-it's fun... it's something
new, something different. It makes me happy." Jeongguk said in a small voice.

Taehyung smiled finally. "I'm glad it does. Because you look beautiful."

Jeongguk's eyes sparkled. Taehyung reached forward and gripped Jeongguk's waist. "Wow. You-"
Taehyung twirled Jeongguk around. Jeongguk's skirt went up a little. "This is beautiful. You're
beautiful."

"Thank you," Jeongguk said shyly.

"I saw you, you know. Flirting with the audience. Pretending to be a shy little princess. It's
endearing." Taehyung smirked. "It fits you."

Jeongguk hit his chest. "It's just an act."

"Mhm. Sure." Taehyung chuckled. Jeongguk then turned and took his pearl earring off. "How long
have you been doing this?" Taehyung asked.
"A month or so. Not too long." Jeongguk said. "After you left me."

"Ah." Taehyung nodded, gulping. Taehyung looked away. "I can leave if you'd like. I don't want to
discomfort you."

"You don't discomfort me, Taehyung. I was scared you'd find it odd. But you don't seem to. I just
don't want you to find me more beautiful like this than I am normally." Jeongguk blurted and then
bit his tongue. "N-not that you need to find me beautiful normally..."

"I already do, darling. I can't help it. Moonflower's beautiful. Jeongguk's pulchritudinous."
Taehyung smirked, leaning against the wall beside the dressing table.

Jeongguk blushed, but it was hidden under his makeup. Jeongguk picked up a powder puff and
patted his makeup down. He looked at Taehyung, who was staring, his blonde hair slicked back.
Jeongguk gulped. "You- you know I don't want to be a woman. I feel... I feel comfortable as a man.
I just like dressing up like this."

"I know." Taehyung put his hand on Jeongguk's hair, tucking it behind his ear. "It's nice that you
enjoy this. I never thought law was for you. This seems more fitting, no?"

"Y-yes, but I'm going to become a lawyer." Jeongguk chuckled. "I'll stop doing this once I become
one."

"As you please." Taehyung leaned down and was about to kiss his forehead, but Jeongguk pushed
him off.

"Don't! You'll get my makeup off." Jeongguk muttered, and Taehyung giggled. "Alright,
princess."

The door of the dressing room opened. "Jeongguk I've had 13 men ask me if you're free to fuck. A
woman asked me if you'd let her do things to you dressed like this. I didn't know what to say-"

Yoongi froze when he saw Taehyung. Jeongguk's eyes widened. Yoongi instantly furrowed his
eyebrows and rushed forward, pushing Taehyung back. "Get out."

"Yoongi-!" Jeongguk got up, trying to stop him. Yoongi hit him on the chest. "No! You don't get to
come into our safe space like this. You don't get to fuck with Jeongguk more than you've already
done. Go away from here."

"Yoongi it's alright! He's just here to watch my show. He said I did amazing." Jeongguk reassured
Yoongi, who looked even more frightening as a woman. Yoongi looked angered still. Taehyung
was against the wall now, unsure.

"Taehyung, sit down," Jeongguk said, but Taehyung gulped.

"I-I should leave, I reckon." Taehyung murmured, and Jeongguk shook his head, eyes growing big.
He didn't want Taehyung to leave. But Taehyung looked uncomfortable with Yoongi's angry glare
on him.

"If you want. I'll see you at home, then." Jeongguk said, walking closer to him. Taehyung nodded.
Jeongguk raised his chin up. "Don't drink, alright? Rest. You shouldn't have come out so late..."

"Jeongguk, you don't have to fret over me as if I'm a child," Taehyung mumbled.

"I'm not! I just love you-" Jeongguk said, and then gulped, seeing Taehyung look at him with wide
eyes. "Love- love taking care of you. Of people. I'm just caring." Jeongguk shrugged, and
Taehyung hummed.

Jeongguk kissed his cheek. Taehyung hugged him tightly and then went away.

"I'm sorry. The man at the front shouldn't have let Taehyung in." Yoongi muttered.

"It's alright. I'm glad he found out. I rather not hide from him." Jeongguk said softly. "Besides, it's
nice to let him know. It's another part of me he's discovered."

"Jeongguk, don't let him hurt you again."

"I won't," Jeongguk promised.

Jeongguk reached home an hour and a half later. Taehyung was sitting in his study, reading a book
on the big leather armchair, his reading glasses on. Jeongguk walked into the room and stood by
the door, dressing in his worn down trousers and big shirt, his face pale, scrubbed.

"What're you drinking?" Jeongguk asked, pouting.

"Lemon water, love. Come here." Taehyung closed his book, placing it on the table beside him.
Jeongguk slowly walked up to him, and by the look of his thighs spread apart, Jeongguk sat down
on his lap. Taehyung wrapped his arms around his waist. "I'm very proud of you."

"Thank you," Jeongguk whispered softly, looking down.

"You're strong. You're proud. You're being who you are and not letting others pull you down. I
think that's amazing." Taehyung smiled. "I think... I think that's beautiful."

"You should do it as well." Jeongguk hinted, and Taehyung smiled weakly.

Jeongguk leaned against Taehyung's chest, wordless. "You make me strong," Taehyung said,
carding his fingers through Jeongguk's hair.

"You weaken yourself. You're not. You're still mighty in my eyes. You always will be." Jeongguk
touched their noses. "Even if you cry, if you hurt me if you hurt yourself. You'll always be the
Taehyung I fell-" Jeongguk paused.

"Tell me," Taehyung said.

"The man I fell in love with." Jeongguk closed his eyes. Taehyung put his arm around Jeongguk's
waist. "The man I love but can't have."

"Jeongguk," Taehyung breathed out. Jeongguk opened his eyes, looking at Taehyung. Taehyung's
eyes were big, eyebrows lifted. Taehyung gulped. "Moonflower,"

Jeongguk gazed into Taehyung's soulful eyes, shimmering with gold. Taehyung leaned in closer. "I
fell in love with you as well, Gguk. I fell s-so fucking hard for you, baby."

"Don't," Jeongguk said shakily, gripping his shirt.

"I'm in love with you. With every part of you. I can't help myself. Every time I see you my heart
seizes uncontrollably. I feel so much better when you're around. I wish I c-could spend my whole
life with you-"

"I want to kiss you," Jeongguk said, their foreheads pressed together. "I love you and I want to kiss
you but I shouldn't."

"I know. I know you shouldn't."

They pressed their lips together.

Jeongguk put his hands on either side of his neck, moving their lips gently. Jeongguk opened his
eyes to look into Taehyung's hesitantly. Taehyung looked back. They continued kissing. Jeongguk
pulled away, lips still against Taehyung's.

"You said-" Kiss. "-that we should-" Kiss. "-stop this."

"I know but I love you so much." Taehyung moved their lips together, and Jeongguk gripped his
hair.

"You told me," Jeongguk breathed out as Taehyung kissed his neck. "T-that I shouldn't be
immature... I should be realistic.... that- that we're sick in the head-"

"I'm stupid," Taehyung mumbled against his neck. "I don't know anything. I can't keep lying to
myself. I know I'm madly in love with you. The more I try to not think about you the harder it gets.
The moment I think I'm over you, you do something s-so simple like make me breakfast, and I just
fall back in love with you. You're everything I've ever wanted but didn't know I needed. You're
fucking beautiful, every single part of you. The way you smile, the way you take care of others,
the way you're so gentle, forgiving, loving. I love you, Jeon Jeongguk. I love you so much."

Jeongguk kissed him hard, pressing his tongue into Taehyung's. His heart was beating fast,
stomach taking turns. He was in love with Taehyung. Taehyung was in love with him. Jeongguk
smiled against Taehyung's lips, and then pulled away to giggle.

"Fuck!" Jeongguk squeaked. "I love you."

"I love you more." Taehyung kissed his cheeks, his nose, his chin. "I'm afraid if we don't stop now
then I'll make love to you all night."

"Mmm, what a horrible thing," Jeongguk said dryly, but then kept kissing him.

"Shouldn't be-" Kiss. "-irresponsible."

"A little late for that, no?"

"She's pregnant, Jeongguk. We shouldn't do this."

"I know." Jeongguk sighed, tipping his head back. Taehyung kissed his open neck. Jeongguk
squirmed on his lap. It got hot around them.

"Stop me," Taehyung whispered, unbuttoning Jeongguk's shirt while kissing his jaw. "I crave your
body. To touch you. To fuck you till you're crying. S-so stop me before I do so."

"C-can't," Jeongguk whimpered into his mouth. Taehyung put his hands on Jeongguk's ass, giving
it a sharp squeeze. Jeongguk began rutting against Taehyung. "Someone should s-stop us."

"I'll do it." Veronica's voice came from the back. Jeongguk and Taehyung froze, both their eyes
widening. "This is like the third time. You really ought to be locking doors at this point." Veronica
muttered.

Jeongguk got off Taehyung's lap, blushing, his cock half hard and visible through his trousers.
Taehyung got up as well, scratching the back of his neck. "Veronica, I didn't think you'd come
back-"

"What.... what do you want me to do?" Veronica asked, hushed, her eyes darkened, eyebrows
raised. "I thought I could trust you to not behave like this when I'm having a child, Taehyung."

"And Jeongguk?" Veronica continued with the lack of response. "I welcomed you into our home to
stay away from your wife, my best friend who you hurt miserably. Just this morning, I-I was
defending you and telling her she was wrong. But- do you not understand that your actions hurt
more people? I mean, god, is it that hard to be mature?!"

Jeongguk ducked his head low. "I-I'm sorry, Veronica. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to-"

"Get out of my house," Veronica said. Jeongguk looked at her, eyes wide.

"I-I don't have any place else to g-go." Jeongguk squeaked, looking from Taehyung to Veronica.
He suddenly felt anxious. "Please. I'm sorry. I don't want to g-go back to Rosie-"

"Veronica, let him stay till tomorrow. Then he can go to a friend's place. It's too late at night."
Taehyung muttered. "Don't be derisive."

"Do you know how much stress I'm under? Everything around me is just- it- it hurts, Taehyung.
Everything is o-out of my control. Even you. Even m-my house! I don't feel comfortable here."
Veronica cried her solid wall she'd put up crumbling down in front of Jeongguk. "I'm s-scared
about everything. Please." Veronica got tears in her eyes. She closed her eyes. "I w-want him to
leave."

Taehyung moved forward, grabbing hold of her and tightly wrapping his arms around her when she
looked like she was about to fall. Jeongguk's eyes widened, standing away. It seems as if the past
few weeks had taken a heavy toll on Veronica, and Jeongguk doesn't even blame her. She has been
under stress at work, at home, everywhere else. It was her breaking point.

Veronica began sobbing into Taehyung's chest. Taehyung held her close. He looked at Jeongguk
apologetically. Jeongguk gulped. "I-I'll go," Jeongguk whispered, turning around and walking out
of their study.

"Ronnie," Taehyung said softly. "Tell me what's wrong."

"E-everything. You're wrong. You're in love with him. He's- he's in our house. And he's nice, b-but
I can't help but feel angry when-whenever you two talk. And-and my b-boss is being unkind to me
e-ever since I've become pregnant b-because he hates w-women. Rosie i-isn't who I thought she
was. My back constantly h-hurts and I feel like puking. I'm scared. W-what if something happens
to our child before he's even born?? What if w-we can't take care of our baby? What- what if- what
if-"

"Veronica," Taehyung shushed. "Darling," He tucked her hair back. She was crying. "I'm sorry it's
been so hard on you. I'm sorry I've been so negligent and only focused on my own thoughts and
feelings. I'm sorry I've been such a bad husband."
"It's n-not your fault you're not in love with me anymore."

Taehyung stilled. He gulped. "How do we fix this? What do we do?"

"I d-don't know. But I can't do it alone. I just c-can't." Veronica shook her head, tear falling down
her cheek. "I don't w-want to be a bad mother."

"Oh, you won't! You'll be an amazing mother." Taehyung kissed her forehead. "I think you need to
lie down."

The front door opened and closed. Taehyung's head perked up. Jeongguk must've left. Taehyung
sighed, helping Veronica out of the study and into her bedroom. She lay down on the bed, tired.

Taehyung changed himself and climbed onto the bed with her. She turned around to look at him. "I
wish this could be easier for all of us."

"I do too," Taehyung said, and then kissed her. "I love you."

"You don't."

Taehyung shook his head. "I'll always love you, Veronica. Maybe it's different from what I feel to
Jeongguk, but I do love you."

Veronica sniffled. She fell asleep quickly. Taehyung lay awake, couldn't stop thinking about the
future and what it held. Everything was unclear.

**
 Chapter 27
Chapter Notes

this chapter includes violence, homophobia, abuse, etc. PLEASE skip if you are
uncomfortable. i have put a --- sign to indicate when it happens.

**

"You're getting a divorce?" Jimin asked in disbelief. Jeongguk sat on the boy's sofa, having entered
his house at an ungodly hour, almost midnight. Jeongguk had a cup of warm tea in his hands,
sitting on the sofa.

"I-I might," Jeongguk said faintly. "Um. We've had falling outs recently."

"Falling outs? What are you, a prepubescent teenager? Everyone has fights, Jeongguk. You can't
just get a bloody divorce over it!" Jimin said, frowning. Jeongguk shook his head.

"It's different, Jimin! You wouldn't understand. You aren't married." Jeongguk said with a sigh.
Jimin sat down beside him. Jeongguk looked at him. "It's-it's me. I did something wrong. I cheated
on her."

"What?" Jimin said, his eyes widened. He looked at Jeongguk with a slight glare for a few
seconds. "You-? I never expected such a thing.... who was she? Was she someone you knew?
Honestly, I didn't think you would ever stoop this low, Jeongguk-"

"Jimin. I know what I did was wrong. But Rosie- she-she forced me into this marriage? Didn't I tell
you? She convinced my mother to not send me to London unless I married her. I didn't have a
choice, really! I-"

"Jeongguk, you're a man," Jimin said sharply. Jeongguk stilled, eyes big. "And I don't mean this in
the bullshit way that elders do. I mean, you're an adult. Capable of making your own decisions. 22
when you married her. What do you mean you were forced?? You knew well enough you could've
said no sternly and it would've never happened." Jimin muttered.

Jeongguk's head fell low. "I-I could have. But you know I'm not the strongest, Jimin. I'm not like
you or-or other men. It wasn't easy for me to just shake my head sternly! I a-always listen to my
mother-"

"So you've decided to ruin Rosie's life?"

"No." Jeongguk breathed out. He shook his head. "She's.... she's mean to me-"

"Mean to you? My god, Rosie's nothing but a delight. Jeongguk, I can understand you have
problems, but clearly, there's another reason you're getting a divorce. Rosie's malevolence surely
isn't it."
Jeongguk's hands shook lightly around the mug. He sucked in a sharp breath. "I-" like men. "-can't
tell you."

"We're mates, aren't we? You can tell me what it is. Who you cheated on her with. Did you fall in
love with another woman?" Jimin asked, leaning in, as if trying to make the conversation more
intimate for Jeongguk to open up. Jeongguk couldn't, though. He didn't want to be hurt. Telling the
truth would get him hurt.

"I d-don't wish to speak of it right now if I'm perfectly honest. I'm really tired. And, and we have
classes tomorrow morning. Can we resume this conversation some other time?" Jeongguk asked,
trying to sound light and airy. Jimin eyed him for a few seconds and then nodded curtly.

Jeongguk lay on the sofa with a thin blanket atop of him while Jimin slept in his own room. His
mind filled with everlasting thoughts which stung him. He thought of Taehyung and Veronica.
Kissing. Maybe if Taehyung would make her feel better, put her in bed, kiss her gently, slowly,
touch her down her waist and cradle her in his arms-

Jeongguk gulped down, hard. What was he thinking? What was he doing?? Is he aware of who he's
become? A Homewrecker. A mistress. A person who might rip apart a child from a normal family.
Jeongguk never had a father. He felt he'd suffered because of it. He wouldn't want anyone to go
through something similar.

And, oh, Taehyung would make a lovely father, wouldn't he? He'd buy the most extravagant things
for his children, dress them up in little dresses and tuxes. He'd call his baby girl his princess and
buy her a castle. He'd let his son do whatever it was he wanted, maybe even become a drag queen.
He'd be the most perfect father. Jeongguk's heart warmed because of it.

Taehyung would be alright, and so, Jeongguk would be alright.

Jeongguk and Jimin walked into class. Jeongguk was in Jimin's clothes. Thankfully, Jimin owned
some shirts that were sizes too big so they were big for Jeongguk as well. They walked beside one
another to their first Civics class.

A man in the distance was running past them, probably late for one of his classes. He dashed
forward, and Jeongguk would've stumbled- if Jimin hadn't quickly wrapped an arm around
Jeongguk's waist and pulled him close.

"Christ," Jimin muttered, seeing the man go by. Jimin looked at Jeongguk, who was looking at the
older boy with big eyes. "You alright?"

"Y-yeah." Jeongguk nodded. Jimin let Jeongguk go, humming. He kept an arm around his
shoulder, however. They walked towards their class.

Before they entered, a hand grabbed Jeongguk's elbow, and he got pulled away. Jeongguk turned. It
was a man who worked at the facility. "Jeongguk, please come to the principal's immediately."

"O-oh." Jeongguk let out wearily. Jimin gave Jeongguk a confused look. Jeongguk nodded to the
man and followed him to the office, heart thudding in his chest. What could be wrong? Oh, he
hopes this isn't about how many days he'd missed this month.
Jeongguk walked into the headmaster's office and saw the old man sitting on his seat, with two
more men in suits beside him. They were faculty members as well. All three looked at Jeongguk
with a piercing gaze. Jeongguk gulped.

"Good morning, sir." Jeongguk said softly, standing behind the chairs against the desk meant for
guests to sit down. Jeongguk looked away, finding the looks of the three men a little daunting.

"We won't try to make conversation, Jeongguk." The headmaster said with a low gruff in his voice.
"It has come to our attention that you are, apparently, a homosexual."

Jeongguk stilled. He felt his insides drop. Each thought, each word got caught in the back of his
throat. He looked at them with wide eyes. He couldn't speak. There was a sense of fear. A
realization of his reality. Of who he loves and why that matters.

"Not only that," The principal continued. "There's been images of you in some sort of a... club. In
womanly clothes."

"S-sir," Jeongguk cried out, weak. "It was. It was one time. I was drunk, and-"

"Furthermore, a police record for your avid homosexuality. This sort of deed is not tolerated here
or anywhere, Mr. Jeon. It is unnatural, repugnant, disgusting, and frankly, you should be put
behind bars."

Jeongguk got tears in his eyes, his hands shaking. No. For the past 5 years, he'd worked to getting
into this law school so he could finally get a degree and then become a lawyer one day. And only
recently he'd decided he'd work towards stopping the unethical laws against homosexual people.

"We have decided to expel you from this school, Mr. Jeon." Jeongguk couldn't breathe. "You are
not to return to campus or continue with any classes. Your education at King's college will
terminate here."

Jeongguk began crying. "No!" He cried, weak. "P-please. I only h-have a month of s-school left
before I graduate. Please. Please d-don't do this. I'll stop. I'll stop everything." Jeongguk pleaded,
hands put together.

"Leave now, Mr. Jeon. Before we call the authorities and have them take stricter actions. You
should be thankful we aren't putting you in prison. However, we have contacted your workplace at
Mr. Adams firm. They've fired you as well. Please make better decisions next time."

Jeongguk was sobbing, stuck on the spot. He didn't move. One of the men walked to him and
pushed him out forcefully. Jeongguk shook his head, tears running down his reddening cheeks. He
was thrown out of the office. Some students stood nearby.

"N-no," Jeongguk fell to the floor. "Please. Please. Do-don't do this to me. I'm sorry. I'll change.
I'm n-not a homosexual, I'm not!" Jeongguk screamed, tears in his eyes making it harder to see who
was in front of him. "I'm m-married!"

"Jeongguk, get up. Please." Jimin said softly, helping him stand up. Jeongguk was shaking, holding
onto Jimin. "Don't touch me," Jimin added in a murmur, more afraid of the eyes of his fellow
students than angered at Jeongguk. Jeongguk let him go.

He picked his books up from the floor which was chucked out with him. He turned around, feeling
lightheaded as if he was about to faint at any moment. He didn't know what to do. Where to go.
What to think.
What the fuck was he supposed to do now? He was stripped of his job and degree. He was left
with nothing. Nothing. No dignity, no significance. Nothing. All because of who he loved, who he
was as a man.

There was nothing but shame riddling through him, no pride, no joy. None of that acceptance he'd
been mustering up inside his mind lately. No. No. He wishes he could go back in time and change
everything. He wishes he was never like this. He wishes he never went to that club. He wishes he
never fucking met Kim Taehyung and realized who he was.

Jeongguk walked from the college to his home, soaking himself in tears. Passerbys gave him
judgemental glances for weeping as a man, but he didn't care. Did it matter? Did he matter?

What did he have, truly? His love was taken away. His pride was taken away. His honor was taken
away. He was nobody. Nothing.

Jeongguk reached his home an hour later, still quivering from head to toe. He tried opening the
door, but it was locked. "Op-open the door- Rosie!" Jeongguk banged his fist on the door, leaning
forward onto it. "Open the door," He cried.

Rosie opened it with hesitance. Jeongguk stumbled in. "They expelled me. They- they took my job.
They t-took it away, Rosie." Jeongguk looked at her, eyes crystalizing with tears. "I have
nothing. Nothing. I c-can't make money, I can't-" Jeongguk hiccuped a sob, putting his hand in
front of his mouth.

Rosie was stood still. Jeongguk couldn't fucking take it. Could she not say a single word? Rosie
stepped closer to him. "Maybe... it's a sign, Jeongguk. You- you shouldn't do what you're doing."

Jeongguk spluttered out in disbelief. "Do you think i-if I had a choice I wouldn't stop how I was? I
would! I d-don't want to be-be removed f-from society like this! I don't want to be treated like this! I
want to be a-accepted, loved, cherished. Not-" Jeongguk closed his eyes, letting a tear fall down his
cheek. "Not this."

"Man up."

Jeongguk looked at her, eyes big. She gulped. "I can't believe I have to say this. But can't you just
stop all this? All this nonsense? Like Taehyung," Rosie said, and hearing his name made
Jeongguk's stomach drop. "You think Taehyung would cry if he lost his job? He'd fight for it. Or
he'd get another one. You can't just sit and cry like this all the time. It's pathetic."

"I-it's not-"

"It is, Jeongguk. You act like a woman!" Rosie snapped. "You seem like a maiden in front of
Veronica, d'you know that? It's so- it's so humiliating. The entire time I was with my sisters, all
their husbands did was jeer at you. How feminine you are. How ladylike. You might look like a
man, Jeongguk, but you don't act like one. They- they build things and fix things! They love their
wives and go out to work! You? Just stay at home listening to music or whatever it is you do. Or
go to get fucked by Taehyung. It's disgusting, Jeongguk!"

A glass, porcelain shield around a white dazzling flower shattered into thousands of tiny pieces and
crumbled to the ground. The flower never bloomed fully but died before she got a chance to live.
"I'm sorry." Jeongguk breathed out in the midst of Rosie shouting at him. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry." Jeongguk said in a weak voice, wavering. "I'm s-sorry."

Rosie stopped. "I reckon we might as well get a divorce at this point. It'd be shameful staying with
you."

Jeongguk felt alone, so so alone, so empty, empty, falling, falling into pieces. He was the flower
and his petals were turning to ash.

"Is none of what anyone is saying registering in your mind? Have you completely lost it,
Jeongguk? Listen to me! How weak are y-you? Do you not have a word to say to me? I'm shouting
at you, calling you a woman! And you refuse to answer me,"

Jeongguk wanted to fall to the floor and cry until he couldn't breathe anymore. Maybe life would
fly away and he'd be left, dead. But that was a wish too strong. Jeongguk couldn't do such a thing.
He turned around, instead, and walked out of the house.

"If y-you won't change then I'll make you!" Rosie cried from inside the house. Jeongguk left.

"You're gay?" Jimin said through the phone. Jeongguk dialed him from the phone booth near the
riverbank. "Homosexual? Why?"

"I don't know," Jeongguk responded, standing stiffly in the enclosing red booth. He'd spent hours
by the riverbank, silent, watching the sea in the distance devour the evening sun. How she
welcomed him into her arms but killed him with the night.

"That's alright. Um. Be well." Jimin said, but he sounded off. "I'm not sure what it is you want me
to say, Jeongguk. I care about you- not like that." Jimin said quite quick. " But this is a shock. I
could tell there was something... effeminate about you."

"I've heard."

"Right. Well. Um. I'll be going then."

"When can I return you the clothes?" Jeongguk asked, watching as cars drove by on the empty
road.

"You don't have to. No really, it's fine. You can keep them. I'm busy for the next few... weeks. Got
work and such. You know. With school- sorry." Jimin said quickly. Jeongguk knew Jimin didn't
want to see him anymore. Distance himself from the younger because now Jeongguk
was diseased, wasn't he? Jeongguk didn't even blame him.

"I understand. I'll see you in the future, maybe." Jeongguk whispered. "Goodbye, Jimin."

"Bye."

Jeongguk cut the phone call, dulling his eyes into the chipped red paint in front of him. He didn't
have the energy to walk back home. If he had a choice, he'd pass out in the booth itself.

Jeongguk stepped out of it. He didn't know where to go. Not the club, the idea of the low bass and
flashing lights made his skin burn in fever. He didn't want to go back now.

Jeongguk began walking down the empty street, hands by his side. There was an eerie silence in
this part of London. Only a few houses here and there, most of them empty. Jeongguk felt as
vacant as the streets beside him.

---

Jeongguk was never paranoid. But maybe he should've been at that moment.

Before he knew it, he heard footsteps behind him but brushed it off. They were quite close. Not
only footsteps but low voices, only getting closer and closer, creeping in behind him, almost right
against him until-

"You," Jeongguk got turned around with a hand around his wrist. "You're that homo from that club,
aren't you?"

"What?" Jeongguk blinked in confusion. The two men in front of him were tall, wearing darkened
shirts, looking at him with curiosity, smirks on their lips.

"You. You're that flowery one. From the club." The other man said.

Jungkook gulped. "Y-yes." He nodded. "Why? Did you come to see a show-"

"Sick fuck." One of them cut him off before punching him right in the stomach.

Jeongguk cried out in pain, stumbling back. "W-what?-" Jeongguk tried, but the other man caged
him, standing behind him. He got punched against on his side. Jeongguk put his arms up but got
pulled until he fell to the floor.

Jeongguk shouted for help. For bloody mercy. He cried until his throat was hoarse. Help, help me,
please somebody stop them. Jeongguk felt kick after kick against his side, punches against his
stomach, a strike of utter pain hitting him for reasons unknown. For- for what?

One of the men tightened his hand around his neck and choked him, making him begin crying,
weak like he was. They pushed him against the wall and then ripped the diamond necklace
Taehyung gave him off his neck. Jeongguk always wore it. Always wore it and swore to never take
it off-

"N-no-" Jeongguk began, eyes going wide. He screamed out, eyes going white in fear when they
broke it. "No!" Jeongguk began thrashing, screaming, sobbing. "No! N-not that! Pl-please!"
Jeongguk lurched forward, not being able to stop them as they ripped apart the only piece of love
he had remaining.

Moonflower. The engraved words were broken into pieces on the road. Jeongguk couldn't watch.
He could only cry and wish that the heavens would help him. But they wouldn't, would they? No,
they'd sent him to hell.

"And if we see you again," The man said, holding his head down after punching him in the face
repeatedly. "At that club, you or any of your friends. We'll kill you. Shoot you. Understood?"
Then he dropped Jeongguk, and the smaller boy fell right against the floor, every inch of his body
in pain. He dragged his body to the side until his trembling fingers reached for the broken
necklace. He brought it close to himself, enclosing it in his fist.

He could see his reflection in the broken diamond. His lip was bleeding. His cheek was cut. His
eyes were red with tears. He was not a man. He was not anyone. At that moment, he was nothing.

How can you break a man already so broken?

Jeongguk must've passed out on that floor with a broken plea in the back of his mind to never weak
up again.

---

[if skipped, two men found jeongguk and physically assaulted him]

It was Jackson who found him half an hour later.

"Jeongguk? Mr. Jeon?" Jackson let out as he saw Jeongguk on the floor, blood smeared on the
pavement. "O-oh my god. What's happened?"

"Who is he, Jackson?" Jackson's wife, Maria, let out with worried eyes.

"A friend of my boss. I'm sorry, honey. You should go back home. I must help him." Jackson said
hurriedly. Maria nodded, seeing Jackson lift Jeongguk's body up.

Jeongguk blinked his eyes open and met eyes with Jackson. Jackson almost lost his breath in fear.
Jeongguk looked so weak. The glimmer that was once in his eyes, all down to his big smile and
rosy cheeks, it was gone. Gone, never to return. Jeongguk sniffled.

"T-Take me to him," Jeongguk said, voice scratchy.

"No, sir, I-I must take you to the hospital-"

"Jackson." Jeongguk breathed out. "Please."

Jackson had never heard a man sound so vulnerable. So he nodded. If it was his wish. Jackson
quickly put Jeongguk in the back of his own small car and began driving.

Jackson reached Taehyung and Veronica's house quite soon. He rushed out of the car and lifted
Jeongguk out of it. Jeongguk felt shame burning in every part of him at not even being able to
walk. But he didn't open his eyes. He didn't talk.

Jackson walked to the door and knocked on it with urgency. The door opened. "Ma'am-! Jeongguk-
I-I found him on the street, all b-bruised. I didn't- I didn't know what to do be-because he said to
come h-here-"
"Oh my god," Veronica let out, eyes growing wide in horror. "J-Jeongguk? Oh my goodness.
Jackson- Jackson, bring- bring him into the house. Sit him down on the couch. Go two houses
down and call his wife here, please."

Jackson did so. He brought Jeongguk inside, laying him down on the couch. Jeongguk watched
with blurred vision as Veronica rushed a glass of water to him.

"Are you okay? Just breathe, alright? I'll call a doctor." Veronica said to him gently, holding a glass
of water to his lips. Jeongguk didn't take it in. He didn't talk. He didn't respond. Veronica looked at
him, panic on her face.

Rosie ran into the living room, her feet pacing across the wooden floorboards. She gasped. "J-
Jeongguk!" She cried. "Oh my god. Wh-what happened to you?"

"Jackson got him here, said he found him on the ground by the riverbank," Veronica explained
quickly. "Jeongguk, drink some water please."

"Jeongguk," Rosie rushed close to him, eyes big in guilt. "O-oh, I'm so- I'm so sorry, Jeongguk. Oh
my goodness. What h-happened? I'm so sorry, I c-can't fathom what-what happened-"

"Rosie. Don't begin crying as well. Just sit here while I-I go call the doctor. Hopefully, he'll be
here soon." Veronica said. Rosie nodded to her. Veronica went into her study to use the telephone.

Rosie brought the glass of water back to Jeongguk, but he refused to take it, looking away. "M-
maybe you should sit up a little," Rosie said calmly, and then helped hold Jeongguk's sides and lift
him up, leaning him against the sofa. "Just breathe. Drink water, please Jeongguk." Rosie said,
being more of a nurse than a wife at that moment.

Jeongguk looked down. There was an emit of vulnerability and shamefulness radiating from the
boy. Rosie tilted her head at him, the fragmented flower. The killed flower. Jeongguk didn't look at
her.

The door of the house opened. "Where is he? Veronica- where is Jeongguk?"

Jeongguk finally looked up, that voice alerting him. Rosie stood up, stepping back. Footsteps ran
towards the living room until Taehyung stood at the doorway, in shock, in horror. Taehyung
looked at Jeongguk and felt his own tears well with tears. Jeongguk clenched his fists.

"Gguk," Taehyung let out faintly, stepping towards him. "What- what the f-fuck happened? What-"
Taehyung fell to his knees in front of him, eyes wide. "What h-happened?"

Jeongguk lunged forward, wrapping his arms around Taehyung's neck and bursting into wild, loud,
gutwrenching sobs. Veronica came into the living room and stood by the doorway, watching as
Taehyung wrapped his arms around his waist and pulled the younger onto his lap.

"Jeongguk," Taehyung breathed out against his hair, holding the sobbing boy tightly. "Oh m-my
god, baby. I'm so sorry. I'm s-so fucking sorry."

Jeongguk cried like a baby in his arms, his sobs filling the whole house, making everyone's gut
twist. Veronica stood quietly in the side, darting her eyes away. Rosie watched with wide eyes.

"T-they hurt me," Jeongguk stammered out between his cries. "For lo-loving you."

"I know. I know. They shouldn't h-have-" Taehyung held him close. "They s-should never have f-
fucking laid a finger on you."
Taehyung held his moonflower in his arms for ages and he'd hold him for an eternity longer.
Jeongguk cried into Taehyung's shoulders for a long time, and then finally pulled away to look at
him.

"T-Taehyung," Jeongguk cried out weakly. He forgot that Veronica and Rosie were in the room.
He didn't care that Veronica and Rosie were in the room. Momentarily he looked into Taehyung's
brown eyes hidden behind his falling golden hair and felt okay. He felt alright.

Jeongguk kissed him. Taehyung held him close, kissing him back, holding him by the waist.
Taehyung was kissing back, not letting him go. Jeongguk began crying as the older kissed him.
Mended the dead.

"O-oh my god," Rosie turned away. She looked at Veronica, who... who didn't look upset. Just
looked at them in a peaceful epiphany. She'd come to terms with the situation at hand. Rosie
looked flabbergasted.

"Veronica," Rosie walked closer to her. Jeongguk was whispering something chaste into
Taehyung's neck and Taehyung was kissing his forehead. "How can you let this happen?"

"Are you joking, Rosie? Jeongguk just-just got beaten up so badly because he loves a man. It's
disgusting to fight anything with violence. Look at him. He looks safe in Taehyung's arms. I don't
care if that's my husband. Right now, Jeongguk is a man in need and Taehyung is a man he loves.
You can let him have that, can't you??"

Rosie looked down. "Veronica. W-what- what will I do? After he leaves me?"

"I'll help you find a job, Rosie. Get a life of yourself."

"I'm a horrible woman. A h-horrible, horrible woman."

"Rosie," Veronica trailed, feeling exhausted to deal with another broken person. Rosie looked up at
Veronica, sniffling.

"No, you don't understand." Rosie cried out weakly. "I thought. I t-thought that may-maybe if-if
Jeongguk was p-punched for his wrongdoings he'd realize them."

"What?" Veronica asked, her stance going from gentle to serious, angered. Rosie nodded. "I t-
thought maybe if... if I found t-two men to hurt Jeongguk, he'd- he'd realize how wrong whatever
he was doing was and stop it!"

"You... you got those men to hurt Jeongguk?"

"I didn't think they'd do it so badly."

"What the everloving fuck is wrong with you?" Veronica asked, eyes wide. "Get- get out of this
house. Get out of this house and don't you ever try to fucking mend anything with Jeongguk ever
again. Get that fucking divorce and leave. Do you understand me? You're sick, Rosie."

"V-Veronica! I just need him to r-realise how wrong it is! Don't you understand? I just-" Rosie was
crying. "I just need him. I need him. I n-need somebody to love me."

"Jeongguk isn't going to love you, Rosie." Veronica gripped her sides. "He's not the man for you.
Currently, I doubt anyone is. But you need to know what you did was wrong. Leave him be. He's
happier when he's with-" Veronica looked to the side.
Jeongguk was in Taehyung's lap, looking up at him. Taehyung kissed his cheekbone, feathery, and
then smiled down at the younger.

"When he's with Taehyung," Veronica said, still.

"I'll get you a job. Help you pass the exam to practice law. You can work for me. I'll jail all those
men. How does that sound, love?" Taehyung asked gently, looking at him. Jeongguk smiled for
once after a long time.

"As lovely as it does," Jeongguk said, brushing a thumb across his lip. "I would exchange all of
that for you to love me."

"I do love you, Jeongguk." Taehyung nudged him gently. "I love y-you so much, but you know-"

"I know." Jeongguk closed his eyes, forehead pressed together. He knew. Their circumstances,
their situation, their whole lives would crumble apart. It wasn't written out in destiny. "I know."

Taehyung kissed him again, soft. "The doctor's almost here, Ggukie."

"Stay with me." Jeongguk pleaded. Taehyung looked at his eyes which were full of nothing but
love. He knew he said to stay for now, but he meant to stay forever. Taehyung kissed him on the
mouth.

"I will, my love. My little angel." Taehyung said, and Jeongguk squeaked into the kiss. "My
darling little angel. Oh, I love you so."

Jeongguk nodded against his lips, pulling away for a second. "L-love me so?"

"Love you so,"

Jeongguk smiled. "And i-if I don't love you back?"

"Don't tease me, baby. I know you love me, just like I love you. More than the stars combined to
the galaxies above, and all the moons in the universe~" Taehyung whispered against his skin,
poetic. Jeongguk giggled out, head tipping back.

Veronica watched in silence. Rosie sniffled. "T-they really do love each other?"

"You can tell they do."

"What will happen with it? After all this? Who will end with who?"

"Only time can tell," Veronica said, hushed, before taking Rosie and turning away to give
Taehyung and Jeongguk the privacy they yearned for.

Taehyung and Jeongguk kissed and whispered to one another. Taehyung read him sonnets he'd
memorized for Jeongguk, ones just about his eyes and how they held the stars in them. Jeongguk
rolled his eyes lightly and kissed him, heart thumping against his chest.

The doctor came by later and helped Jeongguk, bandaging and cleaning him well. After Jeongguk
was alright, Taehyung picked him up as if he were his bride and took him into the bedroom above.
Only to slip into the bed beside him and hold him for the rest of the night.

"I love you, Jeongguk." Taehyung kissed his shoulder. "I'm sorry f-for what happened."

"I love you." Jeongguk turned. "I'm afraid n-now. So reckless of me to do what I did. Whatever
took place, I wish I could take it all back, Taehyung. I wish I never met you sometimes."

"My love," Taehyung said, hushed against his neck. "Don't be afraid. Don't be disheartened. The
war you face is to fight for your love. You don't only fight for yourself, you fight for thousands of
men and women who feel this love. Every passing day that you smile strongly and sing on that
stage dressed as a woman, you tell the world that you aren't afraid. That you're proud, and you
always will be. That you're Jeon Jeongguk, Moonflower, and you won't let them put you down for
loving a man."

Jeongguk got tears in his eyes. "Y-yes I am."

"Yes, you are. And I know one day, maybe tomorrow, maybe in a few years, maybe in a few
decades- you'll look back on everything and smile. Because you made it, didn't you? You'll be
happy, well, with somebody to love."

"It'll be you." Jeongguk whispered. But he knew it wouldn't be.

"Yes it will," Taehyung replied in a faint whisper, but he knew it wouldn't be him either. Both
knew, but didn't say a word. For at the moment, they were at peace.

**
 Chapter 28
Chapter Notes

last chapter before epilogue !!

**

They say love is the most powerful force in the universe.

They say it can bound two together as nothing else can. They say it can make one go to the furthest
stretch. Love makes people crazy. Love makes people cry. Love makes people smile. Love can be
between a loving husband and wife, a mother and her child, a little girl and her best friend.

They say love has no limits.

But was it not them that set limitations on love?

Jeongguk was gone when Taehyung woke up, early in the morning. He felt the emptiness beside
him, the vacancy on the weight of the bed. Taehyung felt gloom, sat up in an instant and carried his
feet to the window, just to see Jeongguk scurrying down the road towards his house.

"Jeongguk!" Taehyung called from the window loudly. Jeongguk paused on the road and turned to
look up at Taehyung. Taehyung's heart seized. The boy still had bruises on his face.

Jeongguk gave Taehyung a solemn look, but Taehyung knew what it meant, despite no words
being said. His eyes conveyed enough. That they couldn't be together like this again. And
Taehyung almost felt an enigma, because how could Jeongguk be so... giving?

Whenever Taehyung felt hurt he went running to Jeongguk, did he not? And each time, as hurt as
Jeongguk knew he'd get, he opened his arms and let Taehyung in. He held him at night and told
him it'd all turn out fine. Jeongguk himself told Taehyung that his child was more important than
anyone. All while being in love.

But right now, Jeongguk, after being hurt so badly and having the most awful week, ran away at 6
in the morning to his house to not hurt... Veronica, perhaps? How could he be so selfless, so
giving? To always put Taehyung's happiness above his own?

Is that what love really is?

Jeongguk deserves nothing but happiness, and Taehyung didn't know how to give it to him.

Taehyung showered under warm water for a long time, thinking, the strong pressure of the water
against his skin waking him up to the future, how lonesome it seemed without Jeongguk in it.

Jeongguk was a gate of heaven that Taehyung kept running to. Jeongguk was a little escape to
paradise. He was an angel as if sent from above, there to heal Taehyung and love him. Taehyung
wishes he could be the same to Jeongguk.

With Jeongguk, Taehyung felt like Lazarus.

After the shower, Taehyung walked out feeling underwhelmed. He wanted to spend his day with
Jeongguk and Jeongguk only. He walked into the kitchen and found Veronica, cooking breakfast.

"Good morning," Veronica said. "You woke up rather early,"

"Yes. Thank you for cooking breakfast." Taehyung said, oddly formal. He walked to Veronica and
laid a quick kiss on her cheek. It felt forced. "Do you know why Jeongguk left?" Taehyung asked.

"I saw him scurry off as I walked down. I asked him to stay for breakfast, but he said he'd
overstayed his visit." Veronica chuckled, and then looked at Taehyung. "He might be one of the
nicest men I've ever met. I wish all men were like him."

"What, gay?"

"Yes."

Taehyung chuckled. "Then you wouldn't have any to yourself."

"I think I've outgrown men. Don't fancy them as much as I used to. I had an... odd craving for men
but, eh. Think it was something inside of pushing me forward to always put men beneath myself,
but I don't feel the need to do that anymore. I can feel confident in myself and my ability as a
woman," Veronica said with a smile, and then grabbed a plateful of eggs and sausages, and took it
outside to the dining table. Taehyung walked after her.

"You definitely did put me beneath you." Taehyung chuckled, and Veronica looked at him. "I'm
sorry, I shouldn't have brought that up. I know you've changed."

"Thank you." Veronica said softly. "You've changed as well."

Taehyung sat down on the table. "How so?"

"You're less selfish now, I presume. And you don't assume everything's about you. You don't
carelessly flirt with every woman on the street and you don't flaunt your wealth heedlessly."
Veronica said, giving him a small smile. "I admire your confidence, Taehyung. I think everyone
does. But there were times you were almost brash, cocky, overbearingly smug. I do see a gentler
side of you now."

"You know," Taehyung said, putting his hand atop hers. "I wish we had this conversation earlier,
love. I wish we could've sorted everything out earlier. It would've changed so much."

"Would it?" Veronica said with a chuckle. She looked at her food. "Yes, yes. I presume it would
have. Had I not been so uptight and impudent myself, we could've been happy. But look around us.
No one seems happy, do they?"

"No, they don't. Jeongguk... Jeongguk especially. My god, I know I've said this before, but to be
able to take so much pain and still- still make it out alright in the end. I just... I just want him to
happy, if I'm honest. I just want him to smile and not face the cruelties of life it- it's not fair. It's
just not fair." Taehyung breathed out weakly and then pressed his lips together before he rambled
on further.
Veronica looked at him shakily for a few seconds and then looked down at her food, humming.

Taehyung left for work half an hour later. Today, he felt determined. Passionate. Much like his
Jeongguk, he felt very fervent about something at that moment.

Jeongguk sat on his sofa, wearing a loose pale white shirt and trousers. His brown hair had grown
longer in the past few weeks, he hadn't found time to cut it. He liked having it a little longer,
however. Jeongguk pressed ointment to his cuts, hissing slightly each time.

"Jeongguk?" Rosie's voice came. Jeongguk looked up, alert. She stood in the hallway, looking as if
she'd just woken up, dressed in a nightgown. "Oh my. Let me help you with that-"

"No, it's okay." Jeongguk breathed out hesitantly and then returned to putting the ointment on his
cuts. Rosie came up to him and then sat down beside him. She took a ball of cotton and took the
ointment on it, pressing it to his other bruises. Jeongguk looked at her.

"Rosie, it's alright. I don't require y-your assistance," Jeongguk said quickly. Of course he needed
some help, but not Rosie's.

"Jeonggukie," Rosie said, looking at him with big eyes. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

Jeongguk looked at her unsurely. Rosie gulped. "Veronica had a long talk with me last night- so-
something I should've realized myself. I always wanted a husband. Brave, strong, manly. I liked
you so much in school, and I thought you did as well! So-so I convinced your mother to let you
marry me. I didn't think... I didn't think you'd be opposed to it."

"You should've asked me." Jeongguk said faintly. "I d-doubt I would've had the courage to say no,
but I wasn't ready to get married yet..."

"I know. I apologize, Jeongguk. That was my first mistake. My second one was assuming you'd be
like every other man. That you'd be like my sisters' husbands. You aren't." Rosie said, her voice
shaking, clutching onto her dress. "But- but that's okay. You're different... not for me, but
different."

Jeongguk sniffled. "I'm sorry I'm gay. I'm sorry I couldn't please you."

"Jeongguk," Rosie put her hand on his. "I keep putting it on you, but if I'm honest, I was never
completely satisfied with this marriage as well. Not when I kept looking at other men in envy,
wishing I was with them instead. You might've done the same..." Rosie said, and then shook her
head. "Nonetheless. I think separation, for us, is good."

"You think so?" Jeongguk asked gently. Rosie nodded, fast. "Yes! You can be who you want that
way, and- and I can- I can move on. Find another life. In fact... um... I actually booked a train ticket
for this afternoon."

Rosie looked down. "I'm going back home, Jeongguk. To stay with my parents for a while. I think I
need some reconciliation. If it's alright with you, we can get the divorce once I'm back." Rosie
said, hushed.
Jeongguk looked at her and tilted her head. "Why the sudden change?"

Rosie chuckled. "I saw you last night. I've never seen you look so... happy to see anyone. Your eyes
were sparkling, you had this glow on your face that I-" Rosie paused, biting her lip. "I've never
seen on you before. I've never even seen on myself."

Jeongguk looked away, cheeks turning a little red. Rosie looked at him. "You really love him, don't
you?"

"I do." Jeongguk squeaked out. "I l-love him so much, Rosie. I don't think I've ever loved a-anyone
this amount."

"I know." Rosie said. "I could really tell. It was like... Romeo and Juliet. Something quite similar,
since they couldn't be together either, could they? If I'm honest, at first I found the whole ordeal
rather confusing and it disgusted me. How could it not? It was unnatural, so far from anything I'd
heard or seen. But now," Rosie chuckled to herself. "I realize. It's just love, isn't it?"

"It is." Jeongguk said, giving her a smile. "I'm grateful for your understanding."

"Don't be. I was foolish before. I mean, I don't think you expected me to be completely alright with
it. But I was just cruel, wasn't I? All my life I've lacked attention, what, with three sisters who all
married before me and have children. I felt naive, foolish. I t-thought, if I could completely oblige
to my husband's every order, I'd be the perfect wife! But now I realize... I ought to have a say of my
own. A life of my own. I needn't do everything my husband tells me to. For it might annoy him as
well."

"To be your own person, Rosie, is gratifying," Jeongguk said, and then took her hand. "I still love
you, you know. Just not like... not like that."

"I know. I understand what you mean. Veronica explained it to me. Veronica's lovely. She's
changed so much from the brash woman she used to be. She told me many things! Enlightened me.
Even about you and Taehyung. Although she said Taehyung was the woman between you two,
which, I have to say, I disagree-"

"What?" Jeongguk asked. Rosie turned pink. "Nothing! I'm babbling, aren't I? You rest here, let me
make you some tea."

Rosie got up from the sofa and rushed to the kitchen. Jeongguk laid on the couch, his body hurting,
but his heart feeling less heavy then it used to. As if a load had lifted off his shoulder. There was
still something creeping down his neck. He had to sort everything out with Taehyung.

Rosie left after lunch. She stopped by Jeongguk, held onto his hands. "Everything will change now
between you and I. I want you to know, I'm sorry for everything I did. I've learned that it's not
wrong to love." Rosie said.

"I know, Rosie." Jeongguk said. "I know that. You have so far to go. So much to do. I hope we can
always stay friends."
"I hope so too." Rosie smiled up at him. She leaned up to kiss his cheek. Jeongguk hugged her
tightly. Rosie then leaned back. "And- and do tell Jimin that I'm unaccompanied now."

"What??" Jeongguk gasped.

"W-what! Did you want me to sit by and pretend like he isn't very handsome? He made quite a few
flirty advances at me, not too many though... But do tell him." Rosie said with a slight giggle.
"Alright, I'll see you, Jeongguk! My taxi's here." Rosie said, turning around and running down the
steps of the flat.

Jeongguk sighed to himself. "Jimin?" Jeongguk muttered to himself and then chuckled. "Ah well, I
reckon he is quite handsome."

Jeongguk went into his washroom to take a shower. The water hurt his bruises, and the sudden
realization of an empty house and what might stay as an empty house for years to come brought
tears to his house. He wondered if he'd ever find somebody to love. In this sort of world, where a
man loving another was seen as so cruel.

Jeongguk walked out of the shower after a while, wiping his tears. He put on a comfortable sweater
and trousers and walked out of his bedroom. Jeongguk stopped and gasped in surprise when he saw
Taehyung leaning against his kitchen counter, sipping on tea.

"T-Taehyung? Oh my, what-what are you doing here?" Jeongguk asked, rushing to him. Taehyung
looked up. "You should- you should have called!" Jeongguk hit his arm. "Or knocked! Or rang t-
the bell. Don't just show up like this, you frightened me-"

"Did I, my love?" Taehyung asked, grabbing his waist and pulling him close. Jeongguk's doe eyes
grew big. Taehyung chuckled at his face, and then let him go.

"I came to talk to you, Ggukie. I have good news." Taehyung said, smirking. Jeongguk looked at
him curiously. Taehyung cleared his throat. "Well. Those, um- those two men. The ones that... hurt
you." Taehyung said, gentler. Jeongguk cowered a bit. "Yeah. They're in prison."

"W-what?" Jeongguk looked up. "Really?"

"Yes. Pulled a few strings here and there. Got them imprisoned for 10 years."

"I-isn't that a little long for assault?" Jeongguk asked. He'd studied law, he knew that was far too
long for beating someone up. Taehyung snickered.

"Little long? Why, it should be longer! They hurt you, Jeongguk. You need to stop having such a
heart of gold." Taehyung muttered, and Jeongguk pursed his lips, looking down.

"Alright, mister." Jeongguk mumbled. "Thank you very much." Jeongguk said.

"There's more." Taehyung walked out of the kitchen. He slicked his hair back, turned to look at
Jeongguk. "The principal at King's College has been fired."

"What?" Jeongguk asked, eyes widening.

"Well, I dug a bit. Found out he'd been transferring small portions of the money earned by the
school into his own account." Taehyung put his hands in his pocket. "Oh, and also those other men
that were involved in the whole thing. All fired."

"A-are you serious?" Jeongguk asked.

"Of course. Well, one of them didn't really do anything wrong besides assisting in kicking you out,
so I might've made a thing or two up for serious misconduct." Taehyung said. Jeongguk's jaw fell.
"But hey, if it's any help, you can go back to school now. I know who the new principal is, he's a
good man. Worked with me."

"Taehyung you can't do all that..." Jeongguk said, twiddling with his fingers.

"Oh, and I've got you a job at my firm." Taehyung said simply. "Law associate. And you,"
Taehyung pointed to him. "Answer to me. I'm technically your boss. So I made your pay a little...
oh well, a lot higher than that for law associates. And technically you shouldn't even have the job
considering you haven't passed the bar," Taehyung chuckled. "But I've gotten you it anyway."

Jeongguk didn't say anything, just looked down.

"And, my love, if it's any help, I bought you a car. Well, didn't really buy it yet. Yet to do the
paperwork. But I talked to the dealership. I also got you a-"

"Taehyung." Jeongguk breathed out, eyes closed. He opened them, and then smiled at Taehyung.
"Thank you. Thank you so much." Jeongguk walked closer to him, and then hugged him tightly.

Taehyung smiled, heart thudding in his chest. "Aw, that's alright love. But you must let me finish. I
also got you a-"

"Taehyung," Jeongguk looked up, still smiling. "Thank you. Very much. But I don't want any of
it."

Taehyung's smile fell. "What?"

"The job. The higher pay. The car. A-anything. I don't want all of that. You- you can get those men
rehired as well." Jeongguk turned around. "I don't plan on going back to law school."

"Jeongguk." Taehyung frowned. "What? What do you mean you aren't going back? I just-"
Taehyung gulped. "I just brought your life back for you. You can be fine, Jeongguk. You can make
it."

"I can, Taehyung. But it's not fair if I do it all thanks to you." Jeongguk said faintly. He turned to
look at Taehyung. "You're doing it out of love. That's not fair to me. I-I should earn it myself."

Taehyung's shoulders fell. He looked away for a few seconds, and then took a deep breath. "Why?"
Taehyung muttered. "Just- just take it! I only want you to be happy, Jeongguk. I don't want to see
you in pain. I don't want to see you so upset!" Taehyung cried.

"You're being selfish, Taehyung." Jeongguk said, and then smiled fondly at him. "You want me to
happy and nothing else, don't you? But isn't life about pain and problems? If I can't get out of this
myself, then what am I worth?"

Taehyung looked down. Jeongguk walked closer to him, and cupped his cheeks. "I know you care,
my love. I know you're in love with me and want me to be happy, be-believe me, I know how that
is. But... but I owe it to myself to- to fix everything and return on my own feet."

Taehyung looked down for a few seconds. "B-but it was a nice car..." Taehyung trailed.

Jeongguk pressed their foreheads together. "Taehyungie. Thank you for it. But I'm fine, love. I'll be
fine."
"What if you get hurt again?"

"Then I'll clean my wounds and continue. Yoongi's told me about this. How- how hard it is for gay
men. He's got beaten too. Mark has as well. So many of these type of men and women have gotten
beaten up, Taehyung. It's not fair to them, is it? It's not fair to any of us. But why do I deserve an
easier way out? No. These people, we- we're like a community. We have to help each other. I want
to help them."

Jeongguk pulled away to smile up at him. "I'll study myself. I'll pass the bar. I don't need that
stupid school." Jeongguk giggled. "I'll help my people. Gay people. There's so many of us,
Taehyung. I can help." Jeongguk said. "But I want to do it alone."

Taehyung put his hands on his waist, looking into his eyes. "How are you so strong, my
moonflower?"

Jeongguk smiled. "You helped me be strong, Taehyung. I wouldn't be half the man I was today if it
weren't for you."

Taehyung wanted to kiss him, but he held it back. "A-alright. I... I understand. But... let me give
you one present at least?"

"If you insist," Jeongguk said cutely, and Taehyung couldn't help but kiss his cheek. Taehyung
turned around and picked up a blue velvet box which was on the table. Jeongguk saw it, and then
stilled.

"Oh Tae," Jeongguk said softly. "You didn't have to..." Jeongguk murmured softly as Taehyung
slowly opened the box for him.

It was the same necklace, the one that broke. The silver chain was simple, but the diamond itself
was bigger. Jeongguk turned the diamond around, and of course, in the back; engraved; a
moonflower. Jeongguk sniffled.

"This is very sweet, Taehyung." Jeongguk's eyes almost brimmed with tears. "Y-you shouldn't ha-
have..."

"Of course I did. I know how much you loved that necklace. I want to see you wear it around your
neck always, okay? But- but it's not about me anymore." Taehyung said, whispering. "This isn't a
token of my love, but rather, a symbol of your pride."

"Thank you," Jeongguk bit, watery. Taehyung put the necklace and clicked it together behind his
neck. It sat prettily on his neck. Taehyung smiled.

"Oh, my beautiful Jeongguk," Taehyung said wistfully. "May I kiss you?"

Jeongguk looked at him uncertainly, so Taehyung sighed. "Alright, I know I shouldn't. I should be
getting home now." Taehyung whispered.

Jeongguk hummed. He waved his hand to Taehyung and saw him off. He admired his necklace for
a few minutes, and then got a call on his telephone. Jeongguk rushed to it and picked the call up.

"Jeongguk," Taehyung was panting. "Hello." Jeongguk was confused. "Sorry for calling I... um.....
I just wanted to say I love you."

"Tae," Jeongguk bit his lip. "C-could've said to my face as well,"

"Not when you're so beautiful, no. I'm blushing, how foolish. My my, you've got me wrapped
around your little finger, haven't you, Jeongguk?"

Jeongguk giggled. How did Taehyung always put him in such a good mood? Jeongguk didn't
understand the logistics of it but at the moment he didn't want to argue with it either. He smiled,
leaning against the wall. "I love you too, Taehyung. So m-much."

"Jeongguk... pretty baby... prettiest baby.... little angel.... pretty little angel.... pretty little angel
baby-"

"Taehyung?" Veronica's voice came from outside the study. Taehyung widened his eyes like a
teenager caught sneaking out of their bedroom in the middle of the night and muttered a quick
goodbye to Jeongguk before cutting the call. Taehyung walked out, blushing.

"Hello," Taehyung said, buttoning his suit jacket, trying to look manly and casual while doing so.
He strode to the living room, while Veronica followed.

"Were you... talking to Jeongguk?" Veronica asked, holding papers in her hand. Taehyung looked
at her carelessly, eyebrow lifted. "Also, the bank sent a statement saying you spent a lot of money
today."

"Oh. Well, um." Taehyung chuckled. "I bought Jeongguk a necklace." Pause. "And a car. But the
latter he doesn't want, so-"

"Oh." Veronica looked at him. "That's... sweet of you. Have you been out all day because of him?"

"Sort of. Helped put those men who hurt Jeongguk behind bars. You know, I had to talk to the
court judge. Pay some private investigators. A lot of work but- it's alright now. He's happy, and-
and frankly, that's all which matters to me." Taehyung said softly, looking down at his leather-clad
shoes.

Veronica looked at him for a few seconds. "Taehyung... we need to talk." She whispered.

Taehyung looked at her. Veronica opened her mouth to speak. Just as she did, Taehyung gasped.
"Oh, Veronica," Taehyung walked closer to her. "You-you're showing!"

Taehyung looked at her stomach with fascination, seeing how it was bulging out just a little more,
the sign of the baby being inside. Veronica looked down, and then back up at Taehyung shyly. "I
went to the doctor today. He- he said the baby's healthy. The size of a peach." Veronica said, to
which Taehyung smiled.

"That is wonderful," Taehyung put her hands on her stomach. "Oh my, I can't wait for our peach,
Veronica." Taehyung said gently, wrapping her in a hug.

There was a small pause. Veronica put her arms around Taehyung. Taehyung heard her sniffle.
"Veronica, love, don't cry. I know it can get overwhelming, but we're only 6 months away from
having our-"

"Taehyung," Veronica cried out weakly. "I want a divorce."

Taehyung froze.
"W-what?" Taehyung let out, eyebrows furrowing. "Veronica," Taehyung pulled away, seeing her
reddened eyes, full of tears. "You- you were the one that wanted us to stay together for our baby-"

"I know!" Veronica cut, wrapping her arms around herself, looking fragile, stepping back. "But I-
I'm not blind! I see the way you look at Jeongguk, Tae. I see how much you l-love him. How
selflessly, wholly you devote yourself to that boy. You'll never love me like that." Veronica shook
her head, tears rolling down her cheeks. "I don't want to do this to you,"

"Veronica. It's not about me, it's about our child-"

"I'll get a house nearby you. You can h-help raise the baby. Otherwise, I'll- I'll be fine alone."
Veronica said, wiping her tears quickly and smiling at him. "Really, Taehyung. I'll be fine. You-"
Veronica gulped. "You should g-go to him. He makes you happier than anything ever will."

"That's not true, Veronica. The child- the child will make me happiest. The child being healthy and
happy," Taehyung said, eyes wide in disbelief.

"Taehyung, please! Don't you see I'm doing this for you? You're madly in love with him, you
idiot!" Veronica said, enraged. "You c-clearly deserve to be together. He loves you so much as
well, Taehyung. I'm doing it for both of you." Veronica said softly. "I can't do this anymore. This-
this game. Of me or him. Or both. No- no, I want. I want you to choose."

"Don't make me do that, Ronnie." Taehyung breathed out.

"Taehyung, you know you have to. If you want him, you can still take care of our child." Veronica
said, smiling.

"Perhaps so." Taehyung stepped to her. "But what about you?"

"Me?" Veronica chuckled out. "Oh, Taehyung. I'll be fine. Absolutely fine. I'll be happy knowing-
knowing I made you happy." Veronica said softly. She gazed up at him, and smiled.

"Go to him, Taehyung. Before it's too late." Veronica whispered.

Taehyung licked his lips. "Veronica. Tha-thank you." Taehyung wrapped his arms around her.
"Thank you s-so much. I love you." He whispered, and then looked past her. He kissed her temple,
and then rushed out of the house in a hurry, a childish smile on his face.

The moment he left, Veronica put her hand over her mouth, falling to the floor. I love
you. Veronica's eyes blurred with tears. She loved him still, so much. She always will love him so
much. She lied. She lied, she wouldn't be alright alone. She couldn't care for the child alone. She
couldn't do any of this alone. But for Taehyung and Jeongguk's sake, maybe, she should let him
go.

Jeongguk heard knocks on his front door an hour after Taehyung had left. In confusion, he got up
from the couch where he was reading his book and opened the door.

Jeongguk saw Taehyung standing there, breathing heavily. Taehyung's eyes were whitened,
widened. It was as if he'd just decided something. As if he'd just found something. As if he'd just
realized something. He took a step into Jeongguk's house.

"Taehyung?" Jeongguk breathed out, because it all felt quite familiar. "What's- what's wrong?"

"Jeongguk," Taehyung smiled a little, but his eyes looked close to tears. "Jeongguk, I-" Taehyung
walked forward, and then instantly wrapped him in a close hug, pulling him in. Jeongguk hugged
back, looking up.

He felt that feeling of flight when Taehyung looked down at him.

"My love," Taehyung whispered. "Oh, m-my love. We made it. We made it. We c-can do it,
Jeongguk."

"What- what are you talking about, Taehyung? It's almost nighttime and you come in like this...
what's going on?"

"Jeongguk." Taehyung looked at him closely. "Baby, I'm so in love with you. I want- I want to be
with you, Jeongguk." Taehyung said, and then gripped his hips tightly. "And I can. Veronica and I,
we had a talk. About you. About us. She- she said it wouldn't be fair to us for us to not b-be
together because... because I l-love you so much, my darling."

Jeongguk breathed against Taehyung's chest, closed to him. "S-she said that?" Jeongguk let out,
sounding breathless. "As in, we- we can be together?"

"Y-yes." Taehyung chuckled. Jeongguk looked up at him, and his eyes began watering. "Don't c-
cry, my love, my babe, don't cry-"

Jeongguk felt a tear go down his eye. "I've w-wanted this for so long, yet-" Jeongguk hid his face
in Taehyung's chest, letting out a small cry. A silence followed. "It doesn't feel... right. W-what did
you tell her?"

"I didn't give her an answer. I had to come to see you first. Talk to you about it."

"Have you thought of the answer, then?" Jeongguk asked, looking up, blinking his big eyes. "Be-
because the child, a-and how everyone will treat us, and- and your-your job! And
Veronica- oh, she- she can't be alright alone, a-and-"

"Jeongguk. I thought about it." Taehyung whispered. "I know what my a-answer is." Taehyung
said, looking at Jeongguk.

Jeongguk looked at him for a few seconds. In front of him, wasn't the man Jeongguk knew many
many months ago. No, this was a man who was changed. This was a man who was putting others
before him. This was a man who.

Who Jeongguk loved.

Jeongguk smiled at him, watery. He felt tears go down his eyes. "You do?" Jeongguk asked, and
Taehyung nodded. "I think what your answer is as well. And I know what mine is too."

Taehyung came closer to him, and then wrapped him in a tight hug, pressing his nose to his neck,
taking in his scent. Jeongguk hugged him, tight, oh so tight. Taehyung shuddered out a smile.

"Then you know," Taehyung began, weak, timid. "Then you kn-know we can't be together."

"Yes." Jeongguk said, looking up at him. "We can't. You can't leave her."
"I know." Taehyung blinked wet eyes. "It w-won't be fair to the child and-" Taehyung felt a tear go
down his eye, looking away. His heart clenched at the thought, knowing he'd have to be away from
Jeongguk.

"Taehyung," Jeongguk began with a soft smile. "Don't worry about me, my love. I love
you so much, you know that, right? You know I only want you to be happy. I want the best for
you."

"Jeongguk." Taehyung let out.

"I'll move away." Jeongguk whispered, fiddling with his shirt, tears going down his cheeks, but he
kept smiling. "T-to the other side of town. We won't see each other."

"A-alright." Taehyung nodded.

"And- and if we do, then we'll simply keep walking because-" Jeongguk began crying properly,
unable to hold in his anger at this world and what it's done to the two of them. "Be-because it-"
Jeongguk couldn't speak. "It'd be s-selfish of us, and-"

"Jeongguk," Taehyung brought him down, and they both fell to the floor. Jeongguk put his head on
Taehyung's shoulders and burst out sobbing. "I love you so much."

"I l-love you more than you know. I don't want you to go away, Taehyungie. I d-don't want you to
be away from me." Jeongguk said, childish tone. "But w-we just can't- we can't be to-together,"
Jeongguk shook his head, and Taehyung's heart broke at his sight. His brown hair fell on his eyes,
which were doey and held the night sky in them, tears rolling down his red cheeks, lips stuttering
out words.

Taehyung was crying as well, blonde hair pushed back, showing the vulnerable look on his face,
his big darkened eyes, red, lips were bitten. "So this is it?" Taehyung chuckled, a tear falling down
his eye. "It's- it's the e-end of us?"

Jeongguk chuckled out as well, closing his eyes. "Yes. But it's for the best. Be-because- because
it'd just be b-better for everyone." Jeongguk nodded. "For us."

As painful as it was, his words held nothing but the truth. There would be in pain. Jeongguk would
feel weakened to see himself tearing a family apart, and Taehyung would know he ruined what
could've been a proper family for a baby. And yes, maybe he'll never love Veronica as much as he
loved Jeongguk. But life... life's like that sometimes. Not everything works out perfectly, but you
have to keep going, don't you?

"May I have you?" Taehyung asked, their foreheads pressed together. "One last time. Please?"

"Yes. Please." Jeongguk whispered to his ear.

And if that was the last night they were ever together, then they made it perfect.

Can't Help Falling In Love by Elvis Presley played through Jeongguk's record player by the
window as the moonlight shone onto the wooden panes of the small flat. Taehyung had both arms
wrapped around Jeongguk's waist tightly, laying his cheek against Jeongguk's head. Jeongguk had
arms around Taehyung's neck, laying his head on his shoulder.

"Wise men say, only fools rush in,"

Taehyung looked at Jeongguk. They both swayed in the moment, as the light of the moon danced
them to wash them in their dying love. Jeongguk looked back up at him and smiled a little.

"But I can't help falling in love with you."

Jeongguk brushed his lips against Taehyung's, feeling their warmth against him. He didn't know
when he'd ever feel that warmth ever again. Taehyung looked into his brown eyes, gazing into
their heated glow. Jeongguk looked at his eyes, looking most in love.

They pressed their lips together. "Take my hand, take my whole life too," Jeongguk held onto
Taehyung tighter, both swaying most beautifully around the small room, where their love
enveloped them, their hearts thudding against their chests rightfully.

Jeongguk smiled against Taehyung's lips. Elvis Presley's deep voice drowned out in the back as
their lips mingled together, tasting each other's sweetness, something bitter yet absolutely
mesmerizing.

Taehyung lifted Jeongguk up after a few songs ended, holding him so close. Jeongguk let the soft
hum of the violin continue in the background as he got carried into the bedroom, Taehyung's feet
hurrying. He placed him onto the bed, and then kissed him firmly.

Jeongguk kissed back. His heart thudded. His stomach turned, and it all felt like the first time,
despite being the last.

Jeongguk smiled at the older man, letting both of them stay in this moment. Jeongguk wishes he
could be in this moment forever and ever. Forever bask in the sun that was Taehyung, forever stay
in his love. If only things weren't so wrong.

Taehyung let his hands go up Jeongguk's side, his lips breathing warmly on Jeongguk's neck,
kissing it over and over as he pulled Jeongguk's trousers and boxers off. Jeongguk whimpered
softly as Taehyung leaned down to kiss his stomach, letting his lips drag up it, chaste pressing of
lips against his skin.

Jeongguk looked down at the golden-haired man. He let his heart wallow at the sight of him, his
rush, his excitement. "Slow down," Jeongguk said faintly, now completely naked. "I want you to
keep me up all night."

"I will." Taehyung said, taking his own shirt off. "I will, moonflower. I'll keep you in my arms until
the sun comes up. I love you." Taehyung reminded him, as if it might flee away if the words
weren't spoken more often.

Once he was naked as well, Taehyung spread Jeongguk's legs. Jeongguk shuddered as Taehyung
licked a stripe along his cock. But he let out a giggle. "Last time you'll have cock in your mouth."

"Somehow the most saddening part of this all." Taehyung teased, and Jeongguk threw his head
back, laughing. Though he stayed so as Taehyung took him in completely, making him gasp.

Jeongguk put his fingers through blonde locks, seeing him work between his legs. Taehyung let
two fingers drip in oil and pushed one into Jeongguk. Jeongguk bit his lip, but Taehyung pulled
away from Jeongguk's cock, breathing heavily.

"No, p-please, my darling. I must hear you. I must." Taehyung wished, and Jeongguk nodded.

"A-alright. Taehyung," Jeongguk moaned as Taehyung took him into his mouth once more,
pressing another finger in. "O-oh-! Tae-Taehyung- you-!" Jeongguk continued, eyes growing wide
as he looked down at the man. "You- you're so- so amazing, Taehyung." Jeongguk breathed out.
He didn't want to cry. Not again. "I love you."

Taehyung pulled away to look up at him. While keeping eye contact, Taehyung took Jeongguk's
cock into his lips again, and Jeongguk's breath shuddered at the sight. He bucked into Taehyung's
mouth, and then whined. "T-Tae I won't be able to hold o-on-"

"That's alright." Taehyung rasped, lips slick, breathing over his cock. "I intend to make you cum
more than once."

Jeongguk didn't need more validation. He got a few more sucks from Taehyung, and then he was
cumming into his mouth, undone. Taehyung pressed his fingers into the boy and climbed onto the
bed, holding him down. Jeongguk looked up at him, messy.

"God, I'll miss you so much." Taehyung whispered. He kissed Jeongguk's nose. "I love you so
fucking much," Taehyung said as he pressed the third finger in.

"D-don't do so many," Jeongguk whispered, and Taehyung paused. "Just fuck me, p-please. I want
it to hurt. I want to remember it for days."

"Alright," Taehyung said breathlessly. "Yeah, a-alright."

Taehyung held Jeongguk below him as he pressed into him. Jeongguk looked up, tears springing to
the corners of his eyes. Jeongguk smiled widely as the tears rushed down, as Taehyung pushed
further in. Jeongguk moaned, but he was still smiling, smitten in love. Taehyung smiled back at
him, tucking his hair back.

"Oh my baby," Taehyung pressed their foreheads together, fucking Jeongguk at a pace. The
younger vocalized his moans, letting them come one after another in song. Jeongguk let his hands
go up Taehyung's and reach his back. He let out a scream as Taehyung found his prostate.
Jeongguk scratched down his back, to which Taehyung grunted into his neck. He wanted those
scratches to be visible forever.

Jeongguk came once more as Taehyung began ramming into his prostate. He felt so shy. "I-I'm
sorry. J-just really- r-really in lo-love with you and couldn't help m-myself,"

"That's okay." Taehyung chuckled, kissing his forehead. "Baby. Baby, I love you so fucking much.
And this is what I'll miss," Taehyung said as he began fucking into Jeongguk at a pace. "Your eyes,
first. The way they shine like the moon birthed them herself. Your nose. The way you scrunch it
whenever you try to hide your smile. Your smile, how pretty it looks in the glow of the moonlight,
how innocent you look, how beautiful."

Taehyung fucked him a few more times, reaching deep inside him. "Taehyung!" Jeongguk cried,
head lolling back. "Tae-Taehyung," Jeongguk moaned, and Taehyung brought his head up and
kissed him. Taehyung pushed in further, to where Jeongguk began crying. Jeongguk gripped his
hair while kissing him. Taehyung came inside of him, filling him up.

Jeongguk pulled away, their lips stringing with saliva. Jeongguk sniffled, looking down at his lips,
and then at his eyes. Taehyung did the same, and then saw the younger giggle, which was
surprising.

"What now?" Jeongguk asked, breathless.

Taehyung took the time to kiss every inch of his body. "I'll miss you, Taehyung. The way you hold
me. The way you touch me. The way- you-you always make silly jokes and- and call me the
prettiest names." Jeongguk smiled, but Taehyung looked up, solemn.
"Jeongguk. I-I don't want you to leave me." Taehyung whispered. "Please. D-don't go." Taehyung
closed his eyes. "Please."

"Taehyung," Jeongguk began softly, eyes growing big. Taehyung kissed up his inner thigh, up his
hip, his stomach, his chest, his neck, his cheeks. Every part of him. Jeongguk hummed in content,
closing his eyes. "This is how it has to be, Taehyung. How it was written out."

"Written out? I'll tell you how it should've been written out," Taehyung said, tucking himself
beside him to hug him tightly, hold him. Jeongguk looked at him with wonder. "If we lived in a
world where- where it didn't matter who we loved. Whether a man loved another or a woman
loved another."

"It doesn't sound possible," Jeongguk said, looking down. "I hope, Taehyung. I pray. That if not
now. Then the children of our children grow up in a world where it's... fine, you know? Where I
could- I could... kiss you in public." Jeongguk giggled, the thought ludicrous to himself. "You
could hold me outside."

"If we lived in another world," Taehyung whispered, arms held him tightly. Jeongguk traced the
lines on Taehyung's chest. "We'd live in a big house. With many rooms."

"Hm." Jeongguk said, looking up. "And we'd get married?"

"Of course we would." Taehyung smiled, eyes twinkling. Jeongguk felt his insides float. "In the
woods. Just you, me, some friends. The minister would marry us. I know how I'd propose, too."
Taehyung said proudly.

"Oh, do tell," Jeongguk said, trying to hide the sadness on his smile.

"Ah, well." Taehyung began, looking away to forget the fact that none of this will ever be able to
happen. "I'd take you to the lake. We would get some of those cinnamon bread biscuits, and we'd
sit by the lake and talk for hours. Then, I'd take your hand," Taehyung took Jeongguk's smaller
hand. "Look into your eyes, my love." Taehyung looked into his eyes. He smiled. "A-and I'd tell
you how I want to spend the rest of my life with you."

"Yeah?" Jeongguk asked, voice coming out frail.

"Yeah. I'd tell you," Taehyung began, brushing his thumb over his hand. "How- how I want to
wake up beside you every morning. How I want to sleep beside you every night. How-"
Taehyung's eyes grew tears, smile fading. "How I want to hold you when I feel low. How I w-want
to- want to cook dinner with you every night. Make you wear silly aprons and w-wrap my arms
around you while you cook." Taehyung smiled. "And I hum a tune we both know. And we-we stay
happy. Just us."

Jeongguk let tears slip down his cheeks, looking down. Taehyung hugged him tighter, hiding his
face in his neck. "I'm sorry." Taehyung whispered. "That we live in this world. That we'll burn in
hell. That we can't be one another's despite- despite-"

"Taehyungie." Jeongguk looked up at him. "I'll always be yours. I'll always be in love with you. I'll
always be your-" Jeongguk touched his chest, feeling the beat of his heart which matched his own.
"-your moonflower."

They both fell asleep that night not wanting to. Not wanting to let this last few moments where
their hearts sang the same song wash away with the wind. Their heavy hearts led to their eyes
slipping shut hours after chatter, giggles, shared kisses.
And the next morning, neither wanted to wake up. Perhaps, if they kept sleeping, they could
forever live in their dream where they'd be together with one another until death does them part.

But once they woke up, Jeongguk kissed Taehyung on the lips for a while, pulled away, and then
whispered. "You must go back to her, Taehyung."

"I know." Taehyung said, smiling at him. "Thank you, Jeongguk. Thank you for everything. For
letting me meet you. Letting me fall in love. Letting me... be-become better."

"Thank you," Jeongguk squeaked. "For making me realize who I am."

They put on their clothes quickly. Jeongguk held his hand as they walked till the door until they
stopped. Taehyung turned to look at him.

"Promise me one thing," Taehyung whispered, gripping his sides, smiling, trying his hardest not to
look saddened. "That one day, you'll move on. You'll make a life of your own. You'll be happy.
You'll f-find somebody to love."

"I will," Jeongguk whispered. "I will. I have, and I will again." Jeongguk said.

And when they kissed for the last time ever, they held on for longer than they should have, eyes
filling with tears once more, hands clutching one another's once more. They only pulled away
when their need for breath forced them to part. Jeongguk looked at Taehyung with wide eyes.
Taehyung did the same.

Jeongguk smiled. "Goodbye, Taehyung." Jeongguk said softly. "I hope you live a wonderful life."

"Goodbye," Taehyung whispered back. "I hope-" Taehyung looked away for a second, and then
back. "I hope you're happy forever. I hope-" Taehyung got tears in his eyes and felt
so pathetic, unable to stop them. "I hope you never forget me."

"Silly." Jeongguk let out, tear falling down his eye, smiling like he always did to not make
Taehyung upset. "You know I never will."

Taehyung looked at him for a few seconds, and then away. Jeongguk saw him walk away, and
then let his tears fall down his face without trying to stop them.

Taehyung returned home after taking a long walk. He walked into the house, and into Veronica's
arms. He hugged her tight, and whispered to her everything will be alright.

**
 epilogue
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

**

5 years later

A loud squeal filled the living room, followed by the sounds of feet thumping against the wooden
paneling of the home. Giggles swam through the walls of the house, making it the only sound that
mattered.

"Well, aren't you excited today?" Veronica said softly, a smile on her face, holding up the tiny 5-
year-old girl who'd just jumped from sofa to sofa, creating a ruckus. The girl giggled at her
mother's words and jumped off the sofa to run around the oak wood table.

"Joan," Veronica said again, the young girl's short black hair bouncing as she jumped around the
room. "I need you to calm down, you'll use up all your energy, love."

"No!" Joan exclaimed triumphantly. "Where's papa?" She asked, looking past the stairs at the
study room, the door which was always closed. Veronica walked up to the little one, crouching
down beside her to fix her hair and take it out of her face.

"Papa's working," Veronica said gently.

"Why is he always working?" Joan asked, putting her small hands on her mother's shoulders.
"Papa's never here."

Veronica's smile faltered, and she looked at the closed door for a few seconds, and then back at her
daughter. "That's not true, baby. Papa's just busy these days." Veronica said softly, her own black
hair getting tugged by the child.

"Okay..." She mumbled. "I'm gonna go play with my dolls!" She said loudly and then ran to her
bedroom. Veronica patted her head to send her off and then stood up, looking at her hands, the gold
ring around her fourth finger.

It'd been 5 years since the birth of their first child, Joan. They'd moved to a bigger house, closer to
Taehyung and Veronica's workplace, further from where they used to be. Life moves on like still
water, with no high waves or roughness, just natural movement.

Veronica opened the study door and then saw Taehyung. The man was sat on his chair, a pen in his
hand, writing away on a document necessary for work. Veronica looked at him from the doorway.

"She's upset, you know," Veronica said in a hushed tone. Taehyung looked up at her, his blonde
hair pushed back. "She said you're always working."

Taehyung put his pen down and stood up from his chair, walking up to Veronica. "That's not true
at all. I've just been busy this week. Joan's quite the dramatic." Taehyung said, and Veronica
chuckled up at him, gripping his shirt to quickly press their lips together.

Veronica pulled away, thumbing on Taehyung's collar. "Taehyung," Veronica whispered, looking
at his tired eyes. "Take a break."

"I have to work, Veronica. You know the big court case is coming up and- if this one goes wrong,
then my client will end up in prison for a crime he didn't even commit, and it's all so unethical, I-"

"I know, my love," Veronica said, her voice always so nurturing. A motherly tone, one she'd gotten
accustomed to. Her brashness had gone away. She was calm, gentle, warm, but still so strong and
kept her head held high. She was who she always wanted to be. "But it isn't wrong to take a few
hours away to spend time with your children, is it?"

"Alright, if you insist." Taehyung tucked her black hair behind her ear. "Besides, I could take the
kids outside, maybe to the riverside. We could feed some ducks."

"Gosh, you sound like a 50-year-old father. Go on." Veronica chuckled, and Taehyung snickered,
walking towards Joan's room. Veronica followed.

"And no, not both the kids. Victor's sleeping, and his skin feels a bit warm so I reckon he should
stay in. Take Joan, however." Veronica said, and Taehyung nodded.

He let out a dramatic gasp upon entering Joan's room, one with red walls and a big dollhouse on the
side, the girl's desk stacked with children's books she could already read. She was fixing something
in her dollhouse, but upon hearing the gasp she turned around.

"Look who we have here, oh my, if it isn't the prettiest little girl in all the lands," Taehyung said
cheerfully, picking the little one off her feet and bouncing her up. She squealed loudly with a smile
upon seeing her father.

"Papa!" She said excitedly. She began giggling when Taehyung kissed her cheek over and over.
"Ew, papa's yucky!!!"

Veronica watched fondly from the doorway as Taehyung spun her around and kissed her forehead
before placing her down. He crouched down. "Do you want to go on a trip with me, little lady?"

"Yes! With papa and mama."

"Go with your father, honey. I'll stay home to watch over the other little one." Veronica said, and
Joan nodded brightly.

Shortly after, Taehyung held the small hand of his daughter, walking down the quiet street of
London. She wore a little red dress and a beret, and Taehyung a dusky golden shirt and trousers. To
be quite frank, they were rich, lived in a nice neighborhood and dressed stylishly. Veronica scolds
Taehyung quite often because he returns from his trips abroad with lots of clothes for his daughter
and son, and maybe a purse or two for Veronica.

They walked for some time, Taehyung hearing his daughter talk excitedly about a cartoon she
watched on the telly and her friends in her kindergarten. They reached the riverside, the place had
small cafes around it and many people walking around. Couples, older people, children. It was a
very nice place to come on a Sunday morning.

Taehyung picked his daughter up in his arms and both walked towards a bakery by the side to get
some bread and feed it to the ducks. Joan was joyful, always was, so such a thing excited her.
Especially doing it with her father. She pinched Taehyung's cheeks.

"Papa smile! Papa doesn't smile much."

"Rubbish. I smile a lot." Taehyung said, smiling widely at his daughter, who giggled at his funny
face.

They walked to the bakery on the side, and the store beside it was a tiny boutique selling garments
and cloth. Taehyung entered the bakery with Joan in his arms, and she gasped, pointing at the
assortments of pastries.

"Papa, can I have that?" Joan asked in a small voice, pointing at the prettily decorated strawberry
pastry behind the glass display. The woman working behind the counter smiled at the two of them.
Taehyung sighed.

"Well, we really shouldn't.... but as long as you don't tell your mother, we can." He whispered, and
Joan let out a shout of merriment.

Taehyung asked for two strawberry pastries and a cup of coffee. The woman nodded. Taehyung
stood there with Joan, looking over all the pastries as she gasped and pointed at more and
exclaimed how tasty she thought they would be. Very connivingly trying to convince Taehyung to
buy more, which only made Taehyung kiss her cheek with a smile.

The woman put the pastries in a box and got their coffee. Taehyung thanked her and took the box
in his hands. Suddenly, he saw the woman's face light up with a warm smile as the door behind him
jingled open.

"Ah, Jeongguk! I haven't seen you here for ages!" The woman chuckled.

Taehyung froze, eyes going wide on spot. Joan looked over Taehyung's shoulder. Taehyung heard
a familiar giggle.

"Hello, Lorraine. I was just here to pick up some lemon tarts. And a piece of pastry for myself." A
voice that Taehyung hadn't heard for 5 years said airily, faint, soft, walking on clouds.

Taehyung turned and then felt his body almost give out. It felt unreal, for a millisecond. Jeongguk
stood there, and fuck, Taehyung really hadn't seen him, nor heard of him, nor known how he'd been
or where he'd gone or if he was okay. After that day, they cut off all communications and Jackson
briefly told Taehyung two weeks later that Jeongguk had moved to the other side of town.
Taehyung never tried to find him.

But there he was, his brown hair curly, short, eyes big and bright like Taehyung remembered, his
lips rosy and cheeks a similar shade. His complexion was tanner than it used to be, cheeks a little
fuller. He looked more mature yet still so young, beautiful.

"Papa your coffee," Joan said, nudging his shoulder. Taehyung looked ahead and saw the woman
had placed his cup of coffee there.

Upon hearing that, Jeongguk turned to look and suspended in his movement as well. He let out a
gasp. "T-Taehyung?" Jeongguk let out, eyes growing big, voice small.

Taehyung looked at him, but he couldn't say anything. What would he say? What would anyone
say at a time like this? Joan was in his arms, looking at Jeongguk as well, and Jeongguk looked at
her knowingly, and then back at Taehyung.
"Wow," Jeongguk let out softly. "I-I- wow. It's really you."

Taehyung didn't say anything, just looked at him with a strange look on his face. Jeongguk smiled.
"It was nice seeing you after so long," Jeongguk said really quickly, turning away. Taehyung's
breath hitched.

"Jeongguk," Taehyung breathed out. "Would you like to s-sit and talk over some coffee?"

"I'd love that," Jeongguk said, looking relieved that Taehyung finally said something.

Moments later, Taehyung and Jeongguk were sat at a small white round table right outside the
cafe, by the river bank where the ducks were. Joan sat on Taehyung's lap, a spoon in her hand,
taking bites of her strawberry pastry.

"So. This must be... Joan?" Jeongguk asked, and Joan looked up at Jeongguk.

"Hello. I am Joan. I am five. It is nice to meet you." She said, awfully formal. Taehyung chuckled.

"Veronica taught her to introduce herself properly to everyone, but I'm afraid she sounds a little too
posh and stuck," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk giggled, eyes crinkling. Taehyung looked at him,
how he smiled.

"Well, hello Joan. I'm Jeongguk. It is very nice to meet you as well." Jeongguk said, and she
nodded at him before continuing to eat her pastry. Taehyung smiled at him.

"You look..." Taehyung trailed for a second. Beautiful. "Well. You look well." Taehyung nodded
faintly. Jeongguk's eyes brightened up.

"Oh, thank you." Jeongguk smiled. "I feel well. I don't come to this part of London quite often, but
I stopped by today to pick up some garments for myself." Jeongguk said, and Taehyung tilted his
head at that. Jeongguk's cheeks reddened.

Taehyung smiled. "Oh, you're still performing?"

"Y-yes," Jeongguk said, twiddling with his fingers. "I completely immersed myself in it about 5
years ago. Especially after I moved away and- y-you know." Jeongguk said, looking up. "It
distracted me. But I loved it so much, I performed every night for hours."

"I'm glad to hear it," Taehyung said. "Did you finish law school?"

"I took a bit of a break. Apart from doing drag, I studied in my free time. Passed the bar exam four
years ago, and now I'm a licensed lawyer plus drag queen." Jeongguk giggled.

"That's fascinating," Taehyung said. "That you get to do both the things you enjoy. But- if you
don't mind- what did you do after you left? I thought of you a lot, worried myself wondering if you
were alright."

"I did the same if I'm honest," Jeongguk said in a soft voice. "Two weeks after you left, I left my
door unlocked every day in hopes you might c-come in one day. "Jeongguk said, but then
chuckled. "Foolish, really."

Taehyung hummed. Jeongguk smiled, still adorable. "I moved in with Yoongi, he had a spare room
in his flat. I lived with him for- um- 6 months I think? Then I got a place of my own. We're still
close friends! But he still performs at the bar we met at, says he has an emotional connection to
that place."
"You don't perform there anymore?"

"Sometimes. But I perform at this club in the main city. It's underground, rather niche. It's unheard
of yet well known. It's a really big place! You should come there sometime-" Jeongguk blurted the
last part and then bit his lip, shy. "O-or not. That was stupid of me."

"It's fine." Taehyung chuckled. "You're still so endearing, Jeongguk," Taehyung whispered, and
Jeongguk blushed a bit, looking at him curiously.

"What about you?" Jeongguk asked.

"Ah, well. 6 months after we had Joan," Taehyung said, holding her tightly in her arms. Joan had
no interest in listening to the men talk, she ate her own strawberry pastry and now was eating
Taehyung's. "She was a healthy baby."

"Seems so. She looks like Veronica, but she has your eyes." Jeongguk smiled. "And that mole by
her nose."

Taehyung looked down at Joan, nodding. "She's a tough one. Never cries, never fussy. A little
brattish at times, but absolutely lovely. Aren't you?" Taehyung said, kissing Joan's temple.

"Mhm!" She said, and then looked at Jeongguk. "Are you a friend of papa's?" Joan asked
Jeongguk.

"Oh! Um, yes. Yes." Jeongguk said quickly, and Joan hummed. "Tell papa to stop working!"

"What?" Jeongguk asked mirthfully, looking at Taehyung. Taehyung sighed. "Ah, she complains
that I work far too much," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk got an unsure look on his face. "I don't.
Don't worry."

"You shouldn't. I mean, working hard is all good, but you should make sure you're spending time
with her." Jeongguk said, almost a little stern, but still sounding so gentle. Taehyung smiled at
him.

"You haven't changed, have you Jeongguk? Still have a heart of gold?"

"You have changed, haven't you? Look at you, all fatherly and all that. The window to the bakery
beside us is reflective and I haven't seen you look even once," Jeongguk said, humorous.

"Thank you for reminding me," Taehyung said, and then looked at his own reflection. "Ah, I look
great as usual." Taehyung tutted, and Jeongguk began giggling into his hands.

"Tell me. How's everything? How's Veronica? The house?" Jeongguk asked, taking a small bite of
his chocolate pastry. Joan finished Taehyung's pastry as well and now was squirming, looking at
Jeongguk's pastry intensely. Jeongguk took a small bite for himself, and then slid the pastry
towards Joan.

"Gosh, Veronica's going to be so upset when Joan can't eat a bite of lunch. Joan, don't be rude.
That's Jeongguk's." Taehyung said sternly.

"Don't scold me papa only mama can do that."

Taehyung rolled his eyes, but Jeongguk started laughing. Taehyung looked at him. "Veronica's
stern with them, I'm the 'fun one' as Joan states," Taehyung said, grinning. "Veronica's well! She's
still teaching at Oxford, and she wrote a book as well about womanhood."
 "I know, I read it," Jeongguk said, hesitant. "I saw it in a library near my flat and read all of it in
one sitting. She's a very good writer!" Jeongguk said.

"I'll make sure to tell her. She'd love to meet you- I mean, maybe not." Taehyung bit the inside of
his cheek. "Nonetheless, she's doing great! Two years after having Joan, we had another child. Just
one didn't feel enough, so we had a little boy. Victor."

"Aw, you have a little boy as well? That's wonderful." Jeongguk smiled widely.

"I have a picture of him in my wallet, hold on," Taehyung said, and then took his wallet out to
show Jeongguk a picture. Joan meanwhile looked at Jeongguk, liking him now that he gave her a
piece of his pastry.

"I like your necklace!" Joan said brightly, and Taehyung looked up. He felt his heart pause for a
millisecond, briefly, a weird tangent in his mind upon seeing Jeongguk still wearing the necklace
he gifted him five years ago.

Jeongguk fondled with the diamond. "Why thank you. A very nice man gave it to me." Jeongguk
said and then smiled at Taehyung, who was looking at him with big eyes.

Taehyung snapped out of his trance and took out the picture, showing it to Jeongguk. It was a
picture of Taehyung holding Victor in his arms. Jeongguk gasped, eyes growing fond. Victor had
blonde hair and full cheeks, plump lips and tan skin, piercing eyes. "Oh my, he looks just like
you!"

"I know, and even more so now that he's 3." Taehyung said with an adoring grin, boxy. Jeongguk's
eyes glimmered.

"I'm so happy for you, Taehyung. You and Veronica both. Past five years, I've been thinking about
how you've been doing as well. Upon seeing nothing bad about husbands or divorces in Veronica's
book, I assumed the two of you were alright. And I'm glad to see it's true." Jeongguk said, warm-
hearted response making Taehyung look up. "I'm glad you're still in love."

Still in love?

Taehyung quickly moved past the subject. "So you successfully divorced with Rosie, yes? You
didn't mention anything of her."

"Oh my, I completely forgot about Rosie if I'm honest. Yes yes, she returned from her home a
month later and we signed the papers. She cried quite a bit. But she's fine now! Yes, she sends me
letters all the time. She's pregnant, you know? She's with that boy who used to be my friend,
Jimin."

"Jimin? Oh, yes I remember him, of course! I'm strangely glad to hear she's happy as well."
Taehyung paused for a brief second, before asking. "How about you?" Taehyung asked, faint,
unsure if he should ask this at all. Jeongguk darted his eyes down.

"Um, well, af-after you left I didn't really think of other men." Jeongguk whispered, not wanting
people around them to hear. "If I'm honest, I didn't do anything for a whole year."

"But then?"

"But then," Jeongguk got a small dimpled smile on his face. "I m-met someone."

Taehyung felt still. Jeongguk picked on his fingernail, looking shy, his smile already showing how
his mind was whirring at his own thoughts. "He used to come to watch me perform each night. He
brought me flowers each Friday and sometimes dinner for when I performed till later. And then
one day I-I just... I just fell in love all over again."

Taehyung's stomach dropped for some reason. Jeongguk looked up at him, smiling ear to ear. "He's
a little older than me, by 5 years. He's a scientist."Jeongguk giggled. "Really smart and- and a little
clumsy at times, but I love him so."

"You do?" Taehyung asked softly, and Jeongguk nodded hurriedly.

"Yes. And I'm-" Jeongguk looked up. "I'm really glad I love him. After you, I-I didn't think I could
ever find someone again."

Taehyung exhaled deeply. "Me too."

"He's perfect, you know? We have a little house in the other side of town. He works from home,
and always treats me so well. He's awfully nice to me, Taehyung." Jeongguk said. "Nicer than
anyone I've known."

"Good." Taehyung said, and for some reason, expected there to be a lump. He expected there to be
a lump in his throat, a muddle in his mind, a stab to his chest- but... he felt content. He felt
reassured. He felt most happy knowing Jeongguk was happy.

"I'm sorry if I said too much," Jeongguk said, glancing at Joan, who was sleepy against Taehyung's
chest. "In front of her."

"Oh please, that's alright. Joan should grow up to be a good woman and know these sort of things
are fine. Sometimes I think Joan herself might be a little..." Taehyung nodded his head to indicate
what he meant. "She keeps kissing girls at her preschool and comes home with flowers that these
girls give her."

Jeongguk burst out giggling. "Oh my! That's amazing," Jeongguk said. "Joan, you go ahead and
live how you want, yes?"

"Yes." Joan murmured, holding onto Taehyung's shirt, eyes slid shut, probably close to falling
asleep from how full her tummy was.

"You know, I would've been devastated to hear that you weren't okay. That something bad
happened. That you were alone. That you quit drag. Or- or something of the sort," Taehyung said,
and then smiled just a little. "But you're alright, aren't you? You made it, Jeongguk. You're happy,
and i-it makes me fulfilled."

Jeongguk didn't say anything, just had his eyes big. "Because when we were what we were, I
remember you told me that nothing would make you happier than my own happiness. I know what
you mean now."

"Are you happy, Taehyung?" Jeongguk asked softly.

Taehyung smiled. "There's an exceeding sense of joy these two little brats give me," Taehyung
said, putting one arm around Joan. She cuddled into his chest.

"And with Veronica?"

Taehyung looked at him. "I'm happy, Jeongguk. I promise you."

Jeongguk hummed. "Good," Jeongguk said, and then looked at his wrist. "Oh my, it's noon
already. I must get going." Jeongguk said, getting up from his seat.

"Wait wait," Taehyung said, not wanting Jeongguk to go. He didn't want him to leave so suddenly
again. Not like this. "What- what's his name? The man you're with."

Jeongguk looked at him for a few seconds, but then looked down. Taehyung stilled. "Oh- sorry,
you don't have to tell me."

"I just don't want you to be silly and find him or something," Jeongguk said, twiddling with fingers.
"Not to be rude, b-but... I don't know."

"I understand, Jeongguk." Taehyung chuckled. "But you could at least come for dinner one night,
no?" Taehyung got up, Joan in his arms. "You could've brought him as well. I'm sure Veronica
wouldn't mind."

"Taehyung..."

"We could invite Rosie as well! Veronica hasn't seen her in ages, and it'd be good for her to talk
about maternity and such-"

"Taehyung." Jeongguk cut, looking down. "I-I don't want us to enter one another's lives again."

Ah, of course. Taehyung stood still. Jeongguk looked at him unwillingly, not wanting to meet his
eyes. "It's just that... after everything with us, I was so devastated for so long. And- and you make
me feel strange when I see you, Taehyung. Because I remember all we did together, how we were.
Seeing Rosie and Jimin and Veronica... it'll bring back too many memories that I don't want
anymore. I'm happy now, you know? Doing drag, with him, being a lawyer and such." Jeongguk
smiled. "I don't want anything from my past to hinder me."

Taehyung felt a pang in his stomach from hearing that but smiled. "I understand, Jeongguk. Look, I
want you to be happiest, alright?"

Jeongguk nodded, and Taehyung let himself take Jeongguk in for a few seconds. His brown curly
hair, big black eyes, small pouty lips. He looked the same as if he hadn't aged a day. Taehyung
looked older, more tired, more mature. They lived vastly different lives.

Yet, they had so much to share. Jeongguk looked up. "I must go now."

"Alright," Taehyung said, with no promise of seeing him again. He didn't want to make one.
Inside, he wanted to let Jeongguk go. Unsure if he himself wanted to see the younger boy ever
again. The one that turned him around as a person. Taehyung was content knowing Jeongguk was
content. That was all that mattered in his mind.

Because those months they shared together, they fell in love, they cried, they made love and broke
and mended relationships. Taehyung felt more in those months with Jeongguk than he ever had
before. But that's all it was intended to be. A brief interlude. Jeongguk was like a long lasting
Christmas that never really went away, and suddenly did and left a wretching, heated summer
behind.

But those few months meant a lot to Taehyung, something he'd remember forever, something he
knew Jeongguk would remember forever as well.

Yes, they didn't end up together. Yes, a part of Taehyung still wondered how life would have been
had he not returned to Veronica that night. A bigger part of him is glad he did leave, because he
loves his children more than anyone he'd ever loved, and not being fully in their lives makes him
sad, even the thought of it.

So it wasn't really the ending destination that mattered, it was the small journey in between.
Jeongguk came into his life and changed Taehyung, changed Veronica, changed Rosie, and
changed himself too. But he got the most hurt out of it, more than anyone.

But now, look at him. Happiest he's ever been. Glowing. Smiling like a little girl upon talking
about the man he loved. Taehyung's heart swelled knowing Jeongguk would go home happy.

The next time Taehyung heard of Jeongguk again in July of 1967. He was in a picture in the front
page of the daily newspaper.

The article headline; Gay Pride.

27th July 1967, a bill passed decriminalizing homosexuality in England.

The picture on the newspaper was of hundreds and hundreds of men and women on the streets,
holding up banners, hugging one another, holding up flags. And in the front was Jeongguk in a
dress, hair all done, makeup all done, holding a sign up high which read Equality for all.

Taehyung didn't think he could've been prouder.

But Jeongguk did meet Taehyung one more time, 30 years later.

1997. Jeongguk stood on the outside of a park, his eyes wide as he stared ahead. His hands were by
his sides, breathing heavily. He shouldn't have come, but he did because he got a handwritten letter
asking him to.

Jeongguk walked into the park, fumbling with his hands, wearing a long black coat, the sky dark,
about to rain. Jeongguk saw a group of people standing in the middle and walked up slowly,
hesitant, his feet padding softly against the ground.

He hadn't thought of him for 30 years.

Jeongguk recognized a black haired woman by the side, wrinkles on her face yet still looking so
young for her age. Veronica. Jeongguk took a deep breath before walking up to her. She seemed
fine, just looking ahead.

"Veronica?" Jeongguk whispered. Veronica looked at him. "It-it's Jeongguk. Jeon Jeongguk."

"Oh, I know," Veronica said faintly. "Jeongguk. My gosh, how've you been?" She asked, strained
voice, words barely coming out.

"I-I'm fine, but- but how are you?" Jeongguk asked quickly, taking her hands in his own. Veronica
continued looking ahead. She had no response. Jeongguk looked where she was looking as well.

A black coffin stood on the ground, a bouquet of flowers in the middle of it. Jeongguk lost his
breath for a second.
"He c-called me the night before, you know?" Veronica whispered, sounding weary. "I-it was so
confusing, I hadn't heard from him for ten years since w-we got the divorce. He just called me and
asked how I was doing. And then t-told me-" Veronica held onto his hand tightly, and Jeongguk
just looked down. "Told me he still loves me."

"I'm so sorry."

"That's not all," Veronica said in a whisper. "He-he said he wouldn't be able to do it himself, but h-
he asked me to send you a letter he wrote for you 30 y-years ago," Veronica said, a tear rolling
down her cheek. "Said- said he wrote it f-for you when you were still together and he-he still meant
ev-every word. He wanted you to have it, Jeongguk."

Veronica gave Jeongguk a letter, her hand trembling. Jeongguk took the envelope from her, the
edges tattered, and then looked at the coffin once more.

"When I went to visit him the next morning, Taehyung was gone," Veronica whispered. "Died
naturally in his sleep."

Jeongguk closed his eyes briefly, stomach twisting, hands clutching the letter tightly. He saw the
stone in front, what it had engraved.

Kim Taehyung, 1932 - 1997.

Jeongguk looked around for the next few hours. The men and women that came in, shed a few
tears, left a few things and left. Veronica stayed beside him for the whole time. They didn't really
talk but kept each other's company. A younger man and woman were sitting by the whole time too.
The man was quiet. The woman was crying throughout.

The woman walked to Jeongguk sometime after people had left. She looked at him for a few
seconds, looking at his necklace. Jeongguk looked at her with surprise. She let a smile through her
tears. "You-you're Moonflower, right?"

Jeongguk hesitated for a second. It was Joan. She looked different now than how she had 30 years
ago. She looked more like Veronica. She began chuckling. "My f-father told me about you." She
said faintly, tears rising in her eyes once more. "He told me so much." She whispered.

Jeongguk walked to her and wrapped his arms around her. "I'm sorry." He whispered.

"I-I ruined it between you and my father, didn't I? Be-because I was born, you had t-to leave?" Joan
asked, shaking ever so lightly from her tears.

"No, no of course not," Jeongguk said softly. "It wasn't you. It was everything around us. It was the
world and society at the time. Things are so much better now than how it used to be." Jeongguk
said.

He let her go after her hugging her for some time. "Joan?" A voice came. "I think we should go
now."

Jeongguk looked. It was Victor. Jeongguk's breath hitched for a second because Victor looked
exactly like Taehyung did when he was younger, but with darker hair. He had softer eyes,
however.
"Y-yes, I'm coming. Just a second." Joan said and looked at Jeongguk. "He talked of you so dearly
until he died. He still loved you so much. I want to thank you for making him happy. You must've
been a wonder," Joan chuckled with a watery smile, before turning and leaving with her brother.

Jeongguk walked away a few moments later, walking alone down the road. He sat down at a bench
by a river and remembered how Taehyung and he had sat there many many years ago.

Jeongguk opened the letter.

My dear moonflower,

Night and day my mind delights me with the tender thought of you. My most beautiful darling. I am
unsure of why I write this. It is 3 hours past midnight, and I should be asleep, my love. Yet, I can't
seem to stop thinking of you.

Why is it that you make me so happy, Jeongguk? Why is it that you take my pain away, that my
anxieties vanish into thin air upon the gentle reverie of your smile? Your smile, I could write
fifteen passages just on your smile and how it makes my heart thump unusually, but I will not do so
today.

Jeongguk, I don't know what will happen onwards today. I don't know what will unfold in the next
few years. All I know is I have never felt joy as I have when I have woken up to you by my side. The
child is a wedge between us, yet I can't blame it. I can't blame Veronica. I can't blame you. I can
only blame myself for so foolishly falling in love with you.

Love is a silly thing, isn't it?

I thought love was devotion and marriage. However now, it seems love is the giggle you let out
when I make a comment about your front teeth. It seems love is the twinkle in your eyes when you
see me. It seems love is the gentle wave in my heart that I feel whenever you smile.

You are love, my love.

You taught me what love is. You taught me how to be a better man. A better husband. Despite not
taking any of it yourself. I owe you everything, Jeongguk.

I don't think I will ever let you read how ridiculous I sound here. I mean, it is almost morning now,
and I had to scratch out 2 paragraphs I wrote about your eyes. Jeon Jeongguk, you make me act
strangely.

I am happy I met you. Even if we cannot be together in the future, baby, I will be glad I met you till
the day I die. I will be glad I had you for a few months till the day I die. I will be glad I stumbled
into you in my house adorably messing with my record player till the day I die.

One last thing before the handsome man you know stops writing this letter and finally goes to
sleep.

I will love you till the day I die, Jeongguk. I don't see it any other way.
 To my moonflower
from your love, Kim Taehyung.

THE END
**

Chapter End Notes

thank you so so so much for reading this fanfiction and i do really hope you enjoyed it
<3 - niv

Please drop by the archive and comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!