Need for emotional maturity

Emotional maturity must be initiated. Not automatic. Physiological growth on the other hand is
automatic

Throw away things when they do not happen the way we want it to happen. So a 5 year old person in a
50 year old body. Hence must work hard to develop the emotional maturity.

Other species are programmed to develop the emotional maturity with age by default. But humans have
the free will and they need to be programmed. It is a need to be recognized – success = external
dimensions. But the internal peace should be developed to enjoy the success. Hence the mind should be
programmed. This is emotional quotient

How to develop emotional maturity

To be happy with oneself, be a kind and loving person. Achieve externally with training (become wealth)
but also initiate the inner growth so that you are rich outwardly and inwardly.

Wealth – 2 types

1) Material wealth – money, power, position

2) Inner quality – Dheivi Sampath – Divine wealth

Values:

Kindness, compassion, charitableness, generosity are values. These are values that generate happiness
from within. Why? By nature each of us are kind innocent people. By nature we are kind, loving. Good
people. Hence we respect people who are kind and nice.

There is love and comfort with one’s own nature and discomfort when there is a deviation. River flows
towards ocean – the ultimate source. So we all are In peace if we are in our nature.

Being loving and kind is basic nature. Having the other things are additional jewellery. External wealth is
the means of happiness once inner wealth is cultivated.

Universal values:

Values are universal. It is not what I do. It is more of what I expect others to be towards me. We all
agree on what we expect from others. You expect what you value the most. We are born with such
expectations and they are not taught to us.

We are all conscious that others also expect the same from me. Whenever you act opposite to the
innate nature, there is guilt. One cannot be happy when guilty. Once u are I sync with the true values, no
approval is needed.
Why deviations:

Natural values – come with nature with which u r born

Acquired values – upbringing and social conditions help us acquire these. Name, money, fame empower
you. Based on the experiences they became the acquired value.

Conflict between the two values – acquired value wins always

Question between what is right and what is convenient.

Assimilated values – acquired values. Gain by power, money. Unassimilated values – gain by truth
unclear.. honesty, truthfulness

Do not sacrifice subjective dimension for the sake of objective component

Small trauma gets created because of violations of values but we get distracted by work. If means are
compromised, the internal damage is created and hence cannot enjoy the success.

Enjoy values only when assimilated. Lies gives short term gain long term pain

But controlling impulses – gives long term gain n short term pain

Assimilate values with knowledge, logic and experience

 Shruti – the scriptures “tell” us the values

 Yukti – reasoning why these values are important – value of values
 Anubhava – wheter ur Experiences verify this
 These 3 give u assurance to effectively practice these values