GOOD MANNERS AND RIGHT CONDUCT (GMRC)

Module 3

EXPECTATIONS:
At the end of the lecture students shall be able to build their confidence

Self-esteem and self confidence

The terms self-confidence and self-esteem are often conflated. Confidence is a

measure of faith in one’s own abilities; esteem is about our sense of self. It involves
both thoughts and emotions and influences how we perceive others and interact
with the world.

When children have healthy self-esteem, they tend to be confident.

Similarly, if a child has a negative self-view, which is often the case for learners with
undiagnosed learning difficulties, it can cause them to lack confidence in classroom
activities, particularly in tasks that involve reading and writing.

For school age children, an unrecognized learning difficulty can have serious
consequences. Not only will it lead to falling behind in literacy skills development,
but it quite often produces feelings of frustration, anxiety and anger.

Believing they are somehow less intelligent or capable than their peers contributes
to low self-esteem, which over time causes depression. It can also trigger avoidance
of activities that bring on negative emotions.

The student may be labelled as “lazy” or “not trying” which further damages self-
esteem and sets in motion a vicious cycle resulting in behavioural issues and acting
out.

That’s why it is crucial for parents and teachers of children with learning difficulties
to focus on enhancing students’ self-esteem, in addition to their confidence. There is
no quick fix for an unhealthy self-image. Building self-esteem requires getting to
know one’s self and accepting one’s strengths and weaknesses.

With a healthy self-image it is possible to use coping strategies to work around

challenges, improve literacy skills and regain confidence in reading and writing.

Self-confidence

Confidence is about knowing what we can and can’t do and trusting in our abilities.
Children who are self-confident may be more willing to take on challenges as well as
to take responsibility for their actions. They can experience failure and vow to try
harder in future endeavors. Of course, the more learners are successful, the more
confidence they gain.

For students with learning difficulties, consistently underperforming on tasks that

involve literacy skills, earning poor marks on assignments, and receiving negative
feedback from teachers can undermine self-confidence. In particular, dyslexic
individuals often experience a degree of inconsistency in their performance, spelling
a word correctly one day and incorrectly the next.

This heightens anxiety and makes them even less confident in their ability to
perform. A University of Michigan article cites the tendency for children with
learning difficulties to see their successes as luck and their failures as faults in their
own abilities.

Self-esteem

If confidence is a matter of trust, esteem is an assessment of value. It is possible for

an individual to be confident in certain areas of his or her life and still have low self-
esteem. For example, an athlete who trusts him or herself on the playing field but
isn’t confident in the classroom may secretly believe he or she is not intelligent.

A willingness to take on new challenges on the pitch might distract educators from
avoidance of schoolwork and lead to continued poor performance on academic
tasks.

Often children with learning differences struggle with both low self-esteem and a
lack of self-confidence. When everyone else is doing well but you are not you may
come to see yourself as “stupid” or somehow “less capable.” In worst-case scenarios,
this can cause learners to drop out of school and struggle with depression well into
adulthood.

The tragedy is that people with learning difficulties simply learn in a different way
and adjusting classroom activities to fit their unique learning style can make all of
the difference.

How to help

Self-esteem is restored when learning differences are recognized and poor

performance issues are attributed to a mismatch of learning style and lessons vs a
failure to try hard enough or a lack of intelligence in the child.

It is especially important for parents and teachers of students who struggle with
dyslexia, dyspraxia, slow-processing, ADD, ADHD and other learning differences to
concentrate on building students’ self-esteem and then providing opportunities for
them to build up their self-confidence.
Here are some tips to keep in mind:

Be realistic.
Expecting a dyslexic student to master the spelling of advanced vocabulary lists
overnight is both unrealistic and unfair. It may take concentrated study, strategy
instruction and plenty of repetition in order to achieve progress. Make sure both
you and the student are on the same page, particularly during strategy
interventions. This keeps expectations in check and avoids any disappointment that
could get in the way of them regaining confidence in their abilities. Learn more
about spelling strategies for dyslexia.

Be patient.
Attitude and self-image won’t change overnight. A shift in self-esteem and enhanced
self-confidence will come from gradual progress and the accumulation of consistent
results. Motivation to learn can speed things along, but it’s important to ensure it
comes from within the learner and is not just related to external rewards.

Be flexible.
Some learners simply need more time and repetition in order to achieve the same
results. This is particularly the case when it comes to people with learning
difficulties. Understand that no two individuals with a specific learning difficulty
experience the same set or degree of symptoms and get to know your learners so
you can help tailor lessons to their unique learning style. Typically, dyslexic students
benefit from “over-learning” new material. Learn more about helping students with
dyslexia and dyspraxia in the classroom.

Be positive.
Provide praise and encouragement and try to avoid making negative comments.
Students who struggle with learning difficulties may be used to receiving mostly
negative feedback concerning their approach, performance or school-work. Hearing
plenty of “good job’s,” “nice going’s,” and “I really liked how you...” can change a
student’s day and help them to start thinking about themselves and their abilities in
a more positive light.

Be truthful.
Recognize them for their achievements but avoid providing exaggerated praise.
That’s because this can do more damage to a student’s self-esteem than good,
particularly when the false praise is obvious to the individual.

The more a student is valued and praised, the higher they will begin to think of
themselves. The more they enjoy success in academic tasks, the more confident they
will become.
Assessment Activity
Name :
Year and Section :

Homework :

Visualize yourself as you want to be and then create a video of yourself while
showing your talent. It can be either singing, dancing, acting or poetry. Submit it
within a week.