Self-Review Commentary
Name(s): Ahmad Azlan bin Arifin
Class: A20G
Owner of the Commentary: Muhammad Syahirin bin Mohd Sharfi
Identify and fill in the items below
No. Items
1. Is there a selected IA prompt? Please state. What is the relationship between
personal experience and knowledge?
2. Is there any unpacking/discussion of the IA
prompt? Is the unpacking/discussion
relevant to the context of the object?
Suggestion(s) for improvement
3. What is the IA prompt
questioning/challenging? What aspect of
knowledge does it explore?
Suggestion(s) for improvement
4. Is there an object? Is it a generic object or
have a specific real-world context?
1
Yes/No.
Sentence(s) from the commentary.
The commentator shows how
personal experience has an indirect
impact on perspectives towards
knowledge. Through further
discussion, he relates the object to
the IA prompt extensively.
The discussion of the IA prompt is
slightly unclear and might require
further clarification in shorter terms.
It questions the effect of a person’s
understanding towards knowledge
and explores the tools and
perspectives of knowledge that
affects said understanding. In the
commentary, the relation between
multiple tools, perspective and
knowledge is clearly shown.
Cognitive tools that are mentioned in
the commentary should be specified
to ensure clarity of understanding of
the commentary.
The commentator refers to two
specific lines of lyrics of the song

5. The link between the object and IA prompt
is clearly explained and justified
Suggestion(s) for improvement
6. Strong justification on the choice of object
and effectively link to the IA prompt
Suggestion(s) for improvement
7. The justification is done within the context
of the core theme, or one of the optional
theme
Suggestion(s) for improvement
8. All points are well supported by evidence
9. Use of relevant core concepts and
effectively discuss the link between the
object and IA prompt
Suggestion(s) for improvement
2
‘Fine Line’ by Harry Styles.
This is shown through the examples
given in the commentary which
show multiple scenarios in which
personal experiences could affect
the knowledge gained.
The example given might be too
extensive and include excessive
details. This could cause incoherence
of the argument that the
commentator aim to achieve.
The link of the object towards the IA
prompt is clearly shown through the
conclusion of the commentary,
although it is not justified clearly.
Including personal engagement
towards the object could provide a
strong justification on the choice of
object.
The commentary mostly discuss of
the relation between knowledge and
knower, correlating to the context of
the core theme.
Most statements in the commentary
are generalised or speculative.
Link between the object and the IA
prompt is clearly shown through the
discussion, with overarching use of
core concepts.
 10. Concise wording technique is applied in Certain sentences are slightly
the writing confusing or incoherent, the
commentary could be structured
better.

11. TOK concepts and tools used are explained
implicitly in the writing
Certain concepts and tools are
mentioned and related to the
discussion, however in certain
instances might require further
specification.

12. Summarize and very briefly synthesize
what the object have shown is the answer
(or are the answers) to the IA prompt
question.
From a personal point of view, the
argument and object presented by
the commentator, it proves that
personal experience affects the gain
of knowledge.

13. Use the object to comment on the Prompt
question and to talk about how Theory of
Knowledge manifests in the world around
us.
Poetry, Music and Arts are often up
to personal interpretation that is
affected by our past experiences.
This in turn, affects the knowledge
we gain from these sources.

Marks: 7/10

Overall Comment: It’s a good commentary overall, with a good, coherent idea that is easy to agree with.
However, sentence structuring in the commentary could be improved, as it might affect the coherence
of your commentary. Personal engagement and justification would also be a plus point as it serves as a
proof of the argument that is presented.