Thoughtful Suzanne Donaldson

A Short Story
by Anonymous
Suzanne Donaldson was thinking about Will
Malkovich again. Will was a witty bear with fat toes
and greasy fingers.
Suzanne walked over to the window and reflected on
her hilly surroundings. She had always loved noisy
Falmouth with its noisy, nervous nooks. It was a
place that encouraged her tendency to feel worried.
Then she saw something in the distance, or rather
someone. It was the a witty figure of Will
Malkovich.
Suzanne gulped. She glanced at her own reflection.
She was a thoughtful, considerate, cocoa drinker with
fluffy toes and blonde fingers. Her friends saw her as
an anxious, annoying author. Once, she had even
saved a yellowish kitten that was stuck in a drain.
But not even a thoughtful person who had once saved
a yellowish kitten that was stuck in a drain, was
prepared for what Will had in store today.
The hail pounded like jogging kittens, making
Suzanne ambivalent. Suzanne grabbed a spotty
banana that had been strewn nearby; she massaged it
with her fingers.
As Suzanne stepped outside and Will came closer,
she could see the vain glint in his eye.
"Look Suzanne," growled Will, with a modest glare
that reminded Suzanne of witty dogs. "It's not that I
don't love you, but I want some more Twitter
followers. You owe me 3776 pounds."
Suzanne looked back, even more ambivalent and still
fingering the spotty banana. "Will, oh my God they
killed Kenny," she replied.
They looked at each other with concerned feelings,
like two homely, handsome horses rampaging at a
very tactless wedding, which had orchestral music
playing in the background and two sinister uncles
smiling to the beat.
Suzanne studied Will's fat toes and greasy fingers.
Eventually, she took a deep breath. "I'm afraid I
declared myself bankrupt," explained Suzanne. "You
will never get your money."
"No!" objected Will. "You lie!"
"I do not!" retorted Suzanne. "Now get your fat toes
out of here before I hit you with this spotty banana."
Will looked afraid, his wallet raw like a grisly,
grotesque gun.
Suzanne could actually hear Will's wallet shatter into
3776 pieces. Then the witty bear hurried away into
the distance.
Not even a mug of cocoa would calm Suzanne's
nerves tonight.
THE END