Ieceoron

Corn

Homeless

Tenvy those
Who have house of their own,
a

Who can say that their feet

rest on what is theirs alone.
Who do not live on sufferance

in strangers' shells,
As I have done last few years,
and as I probably will.

A place on earth untenured,

solid, brick, grass, air:
To know that Ill never have to move
one lair.
to review s e a s o n s from
When the night comes, to lie down in peace
and know that I may die as I have slept.

That things will not revert to a stranger's hand

That those I love, may keep what I have kept.

Vikram Seth
D
 5. Dreaming of the Dawn Wall
alitornia stretches down the West The most famous of the Yosemite
coast of America rock
and contains a formations are the two monoliths: Half
huge range of geographic features. As well as Dome and El Capitan. These
a
long coast line, California contains the huge granite
dry monsters rise up from the
Mojave Desert, lots of fertile valley floor and
farmland, massive pose a challenge to even the most experiene
mountains and deep
home
valleys. California is also climbers.
to the tallest trees in the
world, the coast Rock climbing
redwood, and the oldest tree in the is an
activity that many peop
the bristlecone world enjoy. There are different ways and levels
pine. A large area in the Sierra of
Nevada (Spanish for the snow-covered mountain climbing. Some people like to scramble
across or up rocks
range) isYosemite National Park. Yosemite part of
as of aa walk whereas
others take the activity much more
is a United Nations World Heritage site that seriousy
first Some special equipment such as ropes,
use
was
recognized as a significant place and ladders, metal clips (called carabiners) and
protected by law in 1864.
belays to help them climb. This is knownms
Yosemite known worldwide and millions of
is
aid
tourists visit the waterfalls, forests and valleys
climbing. Others use very little equipme
preterring to free climb. Free climbing is
every year. It is a dream destination for rock
climbers who wish to scale the valley walls.
climbing without much equipment, using
the
body to work out a route up or
the
acrose tha
The awe inspiring rock formations incredible
are
rock face. Free
climbers use a safety rope
to see and many climbers long to visit and get up is attached below them to save them it tn thev
close to these towering granite giants. fall oft. One pes d
person who excels in all t

70
 he was
imbing and is very well respected among
ch Blanc and the Matterhorn. When
rious climbers is Tommy Caldwell to climbing
sixteen, Tommy signed up
a

Cimbers need to be fit and strong. They need competition. He surprised a lot of people by
the
winning becoming
the competition and
to be flexible and agile. They must be able few years
national champion. Over the next
to endure pain and physical hardship while mark in the
Tommy trained hard and made his
keeping calm and tocused. Tommy has all of
these attributes.
climbing world.
Yosemite and he
Born in America in 1978, Tommy began Tommy enjoys climbing in
has tried many of the routes up El Capitan.
climbing at a young age with his father. Soon
The 3000-foot cliff is so sheer that from
a

itbecame clear that the young boy hada distance it looks like a smooth surface. Free
talent and his father helped him to develop in
it by encouraging him and taking him on
climbers struggle to find edges and ledges
the rock to hold on to.
climbing trips. When Tommy was fourteen,
they went to Europe and climbed Mont
 So, of the hundred or noe routes up tl
one Muchto everyore s surprise T'omny's
Capitan. onh thirteen have been suce
essthully limbingtechnique continued to
improve
tree cambed Of these, the most dittheult is was ment ally and
physically strong, e ke
aled the IDawn IWall Tomy's dream was to that he could withstand hunger, thirst
and
tree chmb the whole route n one trip pain He could keep calm when faced
with
danger or dificulty. It he came face to face lea
ln 20000 Tommy and three other climbers
were in Krgvzstan chimbing in the P'amir
with a
challenge, he dealt with it head on
Ala: mountaun range when they were shot T'ommy Caldwell trains every day. He runs
atand then captured by Uzbekistanirebels. in the
mountains for 12 miles, he trains his
Atter six davs of being
held hostage,
Tommy muscles with weights, and he
practises his
managed to overpowera guard and get free.
climbingon specially
a built wall his house
in
The four climbers had to trek 29km before they He began to focus his time and effort
his on
tound help The sutfering and fear they had
long time goal of climbing the Dawn Wall.
experienced had a deep eftect on Tommy and Long climbs are divided
the other cdimbers. Tommy has been
into
pitches that are

reported roughly the length of a standard climbing rope

as
saving that the experience made him realize Tommy worked with his
that if he could cope with climbing partner
being held hostage Kevin Jorgeson, to map out the pitches on the
he could cope with
anything. Dawn Wall. They planned a route of
thirty two
Then, 2001, disaster struck again. Tommy
in pitches. Two of these, 14 and l5, are some
was
working with a table saw when he had an of the most difficult climbs in the world. One
acadent and chopped off the requires the climber to balance carefully on
of
top his index
tinger. Despite the pain, he acted quickly and fingertips and toes and spring sideways to catch
put the piece of his inger in ice. When he and hold on to a small bit of rock. For a few

got to hospital the doctors were able to sew milliseconds the clinmber is high above the earth
his
finger back together. However, they told jumping from one part of a clitf face to another
Tommy that it would never recover
fully. Tommy and Kevin began their climb on the
Tommy knew that having nine fingers was 27 December, 2014. They slept in tents that
a serious problem for a professional climber were
hung trom the clitt tace, their triends
but he also knew that he would
not be able to
climb well if one of his
fingers
could not grip
properly. He asked the doctors to remove the
tip and, with his father, worked on
making
his
hands stronger than ever
betore. Many people
thought that his climbing career was over
It wasn t

72 Tommy Caldwell and Kevin Jorgeson

helped the
helped them by providing a daily supply of free had free climbed
climbing where no o n e
water and lots of support.
before.
Sometimes, it it wasint
cloudy or cool enough On 9 January, 2015, Tommy Caldwell and
for them to climb in the daytime, they had to
Kevin Jorgeson became the first people to free
dimb at night. For the first week, the pair made climb up the Dawn Wall of El Capitan. No one

good progress and, at the notorious pitch 15,
Tommy climbed it and moved on, but Kevin
idn t. He fell. The next day, he tried again. It
wasn t to be. For ten days Kevin was stuck on
pitch15. His fingers bled, his muscles ached
and his spirits were low. Tommy did not
want to go too far ahead without Kevin but it
iooked like he might have to. Then, on the 9th
ofJanuary, Kevin made it through pitch 15.
The crew on the ground who were supporting
the climbers celebrated and Kevin's spirits
lited. Soon the two men were back together,
had ever managed to free climb up the Dawn
Wall before. In order to understand just how
steep and difficult the climb is, we can compare
it to another 3000-foot route on El Capitan,
Salathé Wall. Tommy Caldwell free climbed
all the way to the top of Salathé Wall, trekked
down to the bottom and climbed up a different
way. This amazing feat took him 24 hours.
The climb up the Dawn Wall had taken nearly
eighteen days.

WORDS TO KNOWw
agle able to move quickly and easily monolith a single massive stone or rock

atributes features or qualities of a person Mont Blanc the highest mountain in

Europe
part of the Alps that spans the borde
or thing
between trance and ltaly
such as metal
Elay a rock, bush or other object,
notorious well known or tamous for
rope can be put round
Oops, that a running
something bad
to secure a hold
pitch clmbers divide long climbs into sections
endu t0 patiently put up with
something
alled pitc hes, pitches can vary in
legth
painful or difficult
Scale to climb
at sonething
ALel to be exceptionally good
sheer very steep, almost or actually
fertile oil or land that is capable of producing
perpendicular
8ood crop growth
significant very inmportant, noteworthy
granite aa very hard igneous rock, often used
nite
United Nations World Heritage site a place that
in building
 4. Extreme Weather

weather and
consistent
that have reliably
hether the weather be fine weather is changeable.
Or whether the weather be not, others where the
with heat, cold, rain,
Humans have to contend
Whether the weather be cold and more. We
Or weather the weather be hot, wind, storms, fog, humidity
ways of protecting and
have developed many
We'll weather the weather
ourselves from the weather and the
Whatever the weather, shielding
sunscreen, air
conditions it creates: umbrellas,
Whether we like it or not.
conditioning, fans, heaters, thermal clothing,
Each part of the planet has its own cycles
desalination plants and so many more
and variations in temperature, precipitation, inventions mean that people can explore and
dryness, heat and cold that constitute the the hostile
live comfortably on even more areas

weather in that area. of the earth. However, despite the innumerable

to advances in technology, the weather and
In some places the four seasons are easy
sudden
identify whilst in others there is extreme temperatures still create problems and
a

summer or little variation have a drastic impact on mankind.

jump from winter to
destinations
throughout the year. There are
 134 F,
ther stations have been set up all over the 1913,a temperature of S6.6°C, or ever
temperature
d. Theyare used to measure temperature, set the record for the highest
in a
ather conditions. 'Ihis data weather station
fall and other
i n t a n
recorded. This was at a
Valley,
to analyze, try to understand iurnace Creck in Death
lelos scientists placecalled instruments in E
and attempt
to predict the weather. In some USA. In 1922, ground-based 58°C
temperature
of
records have been kept for nmany years. Aziza, Libya recorded a
places that
temperature
la other pl.aces the extreme conditions have on September 13t, The high
south that
nmade it alost inmposSible tor scientists to set
day was due to winds from the
partly Desert.
blew in hot air from over the Sahara
up or
mantain recordng equipment.
have used satellite
Hottest and coldest More recently scientists
record data from the middle of
of the world images to
The hottest and coldest parts
otherwise inaccessible.
are sparsely inhabited. With technological deserts that are

Satellite scans have an advantage o v e r weather

developments, such as satellites that use
another way too; they measure
stations in
infrared scans and eco-drones, scientists the temperature on the land rather than just
have been able to add to existing ground data in
above it. In 2005, in the Dasht-e Lut Desert
collection nmethods and venture further into
Iran scientists measured the highest surface
these diffhcult to access areas of the earth that
are too hot or too cold. temperature ever of 70.7°C (159.3°F)!
Life does not thrive in extreme temperatures.
In some places in India, the temperature can

reach 50°C. At this temperature people are at

Nothing-not even bacteria-lives in the
middle of the Dasht-e Lut Desert.
risk from heat exhaustion, dehydration and
death.They want to sit in cool baths (but water
when
warms
up quickly and is usually scarce
temperatures are this high), drink iced drinks
and stay in air-conditioned buildings or rest in

the shade.

in the history of ancient civilizations in EgyPs

Persia and North Africa, gardens were carelully

Crafted and planned to provide produce,
Shade, water and create tranquil, cool areas in
nerwise hot countries. Where there is fresh
be relief from
er and trees there can some
the heat.
onstantchang in weather conditions mean

that a number of places on earth compete for

the record Dasht-e Lut Desert
of the hottest place on earth. In July
55
 Similarly the barren icy desert of the Antarctic speciallyadapted to the environment, ca
does not support life. The coldest live there. A desert is defined
the world with a record
place in as an
rea tha
lowest temperature receives less than 25cm of precipitatiorn a
of-91°C (133.6°F) is the Antarctic ice sheet. Deserts are formed by, and usually receje
There-at Russia's Vostok ice station-is a vast eive
rainfall due to global wind patterns. The wi
wir
lake buried 4km below the the
ice. This is a remote, direction across earth means that
clour.
dangerous and rarely visited place. are pushed over tropical forests and mour
Measuring temperatures in these extreme ranges both of
whichdraw out all the
moist
locations is difficult, but so that by the time the winds reach the
scientists, keen to find dee
out how cold it can regions they are dry.
get, use data collected from
ice
stations and satellites to find
out more about Chile in South America has a high plateau in
weather patterns.
the North of the country called the
Human beings live in some Atacar
very cold places Desert. Rainfall on the mountains to the ea
on earth. Life
of Russia,
is
tough in the coldest
regions of the Atacama Desert creates a rain shado
Canada, Mongolia and Greenland, on the desert so that no rain falls
the on
and the state of Alaska in
the USA. Harsh, desert plateau. A rain shadow is a dry area o
dark winters with
long periods where the the leeward side of a mountainous
area. The
temperature remains well below 0°C are mountains block the
part of of
passage
life for inhabitants
of towns in these countries. weather systems and cast a rain-produci
In the town of shadow of dryne
Oymyakon, Russia, which has a behind them.
population of around S00 people, the average
daily temperature in January has been recorded
as-46'C!
Driest and wettest
Some parts of the world are famous for
their
wetlands, waterways, storms, snow and rainfall
while other places are as well known for
being
dry, parched and prone to drought. The wettest
and driest places on earth are
fascinating for a
number of reasons.
Deserts are renowned for their dry status.
One might imagine stretches of sand or dusty
earth and rocks baking in the heat, but there
are different types of desert. One third of the

land on earth is part of the desert biome and

i s so dry that only specific plants and animals,
56 Atacama Desert
 mo
can because the
Desert is commonly known as the rain. This is ater,
The rushing
Atacama

The
that non-pol region in the world and bring t o u r i s t s
area.
to the are

a year.
the
drest
waterfalls and lush vegetation
he the oldest desert on earth. The average Cascading if they
marbe want to
see-even

ive, little raintallis about ISmm per year, although

Sgnts
that people
umbrella to do so!
Over
under a n
wind receive 1-3mm in
year. Some
a have to stand n e t w o r k of
locations createda vast
the rain has
s o m e

uds eather
stations in the Atacama have never centuries,
c a v e s in
India
and deepest
despite the Atacama's some of the longest
ntain rain. However,
keen c a v e r s
from all
tourists and
r e c e i r e d

it is not the driest place

isture utation for aridity,
reputation
which attract

over the worid.

sert on earth.

in Meghalaya gets
as a surpris that Antarctica, which The village of Mawsynrarn
earth with neariy
come
may
thetitle of wettest place on year. The village
tm

in is s e e n
as a land ofsnowand ice, contains the
earth. Antarctica may provoke 12m ofrain average per
on
drest place and it lies in the
a on

is situated on the
mountains
of snowy landscapes but in clouds
st mental images that carry rain filled
of warm winds
amongst the ice,
snowhuge,
and cold lies a path
The winds a r e
that is almost entirelyy over from the Bay ofBengal.
mountainous region narrower zone
and
free ofice and snow. This large
ice-free region pushed together in the The
c o n c e n t r a t e their
moisture on the village.
and contains the Dry
hasverylowhumidity mountainsides
clouds become trapped on the
Valleys-a desert. Here, powerful winds rush
ng sheer mountain walls at speeds ofup and drop all the water they
accumulate over

SS down the and mosty

to 320kph, heating and evaporating any ice,
water and snow so that there is n o precipitation
all. The landscape is so arid
at
arevery interested in studying
similar to the
s the place on earth that is most
conditions on the planet Mars.
in contrast, the wettest place on
drenched with downpours, which fill the
streams and rivers to bursting point and
Sometimes beyond. In Meghalaya, India,
meters! Even
yearly average rainfall is over 11
n the drier months--from December to
ebruary-the average precipitation
north-east
esidents ofthe small state in
Or ndia, whose lives are sometimes adversely
affected when the massive a m o u n t ofrainfall
auses devastation by washing away power
inneses and buildings, do not complain about
the s u m m e r months in massive
continuous m o n s o o n deluges.
that scientists
Bizarre weather
it--because it
It is a stereotype of British people that they
spend a lot of time talking about the weather.
This might be because the temperature, rain
earth is and wind can change day by day and hour
by hour in the United Kingdom. Although
temperatures are not extreme and the four
the seasons are easily identified, the weather in the
UK is unpredictable: it is likely to rain on 9 to
14 days in each month; it is perfectly possible
is 60mm. to have a cold day in the middle of the summer
the and warm sunshine on a winter's day; it is
completely normal to have a range of weather
in any one day. It's no wonder that the weather
has had an impact on the English language
which is full of weather-related idioms.
57
 umbrella. It's raining cats
Don'1 forget your
Unsurprisingly, the majority of these idioms anddogs.
contain reterences to rain!
and dogs is a common idiom
It's raining cats
that means it's raining veryheavily. There is
no evidence
that it has ever actually rained
cats and dogs but there are acounts of other
animals falling from the sky.

Raining fish!

There have been reports of fish falling from

A rainy day in London
The weather can be powerful and dramatic:
spectacular storms with thunder that
booms and lightening that cracks across the
sky; whirwinds in the form oftornadoes,
waterspouts and land spouts; blizzards and
heatwaves. Sometimes there are also bizarre
weather events. In the United Kingdom you
might hear the following exchange
T need some milk. I'm going to walk to
theshop
the sky from various places around the world,
including a number of places in India. In Yoro
Honduras, they have a yearly Lluvia de Peces
or Fish Rain celebration. In Singapore, on 22
February 1861, fish appeared in puddles after
a big rainfall. More recently there have been
eports of fish rain in Moose Jaw in Canada,
Loreto in the Philippines, and in places in
Tamil Nadu, Kerala and Andhra Pradesh.
In 2013, spiders rained down on a town in
Brazil. In 2010, frogs and toads fell in
Hungar
twice! And, perhaps most of the most bizarre
of all of these, it is said that in Bath, England,
in 1894 it rained jellyfish!

Famous for being the wettest place on Earth, Meghalaya

has something for everyone and much, much more to it
than the magnilicent monsoon season.

Wonders of water:

Ride the rivers on

exciting speedboat tours or leisurely
river cruises. Take in the watertalls and rapids and the
huge variety of bridges big and small that criss-cross
the ive waterways of the state. Explore your wild side

Visit Meghalaya! with water sports such as river canyoning, kayaking or

water- sking

8
 9 Diary of a Nobody

W of people I have
hy should I not
publish my
diary? I have often seen diaries
never even heard
in it?
I am
'Home, Sweet Home, that's my
motto.
always in of an evening. Our old friend
Gowing may drqp in without ceremony, or
fail to of, andI
ourNce OF eY Se
see-because I do not neighbour, CumaingS, might pop round
happen to be a
Somebody'-why my diary should not be My dear Nae0
wife Caroline and Yson
are pleased to
interesting. My only regret is that I did not see him, if he drops in on us. But Carrie
and
commence it when I was a T can
youth. manage pass our evenings together
to
without friends. There is
Charles Pooter be done:
always something to
a tin-tack here, a Venetian blind to
My dear wife Carrie and I have
just been a
put straight, a fan
nail up, or
to
part of a
week in our new
house-a nice six-roomed
to
down-all of which I can do withcarpet
nail
residence with a front breakfast pipe in my mouth; while Carrie is not my
parlour. We above
have a little front putting a button on a shirt,
garden; and there is a flight case, or
mending a
pillow
of ten steps up to the front door, which, practising on our new cottage piano
by- (on hire purchase ). It is also a
the-by, we keep locked. Cummings, Gowing to us to know that great comfort
and our other friends
always come to the little so well in
our boy Willie is getting on
side entrance, which saves the servant the
the Bank at Oldham. We should like
to see more of him.
trouble of going up to the front Now for my
door, thereby diary:
taking her from her work. We have a nice little
back garden which runs down to the
railway.
We were worried about the noise of the trains
at first, but the landlord said we should not

notice them after a bit, and took £2 off the

rent. He was certainly right; and beyond the
cracking of the garden wall at the bottom, we
have suffered no
inconvenience.
After my work in the City, I like to be at home. 900
What's the good of a home, if you are never

132 The House

APRIL3 APRIL5
Carrie
edesmen called for custom, and I pronmised
Tradesa
Two shoulders of mutton arrived,
butcher without
Farmerson,theliro
thelironmonger to give himha e e having
V n g arranged
another butcher Witnou
arranged with another
nerson, a .

S and fell over

ifI wanted any nails owta consulting me. Gowing called,
n
Must get that scraper
hu. that
reminds me there is no key to our scraper coming in.

droom door, and the bells must be seen to. removed.

The parlour bell is broken, and the front door APRIL 6

rings up
in the servant's bedroom, which is and though it was
Couldn't find umbrella,
rdiculous. Dear triend Gowing dropped in, had to go
without it Sarah,
hutwouldn't stay, saying there was an infernal pouring with rain, have took
bu servant, said Mr Gowing must
I a nour a stick in
smellotpaint. as there w a s
it by mistake last night,
nobody
APRIL 4
the 'allthat didn't belong to
I
Tradesmen still calling; Carrie being out,
APRIL 7
arranged to deal with Horwin, who seemed a looked forward to being
shop. Ordered a
nice clean
Being Saturday, I
a few things straight;
civilbutcher with a him
home early, and putting
shoulder of mutton for tomorrow, give
to
were absent through
buttwo managers
Gowing.unexpectedly home till seven. I am
a trial. In the evening, did not get
he had w o n illness, and I
illness,
in to show me a clay pipe shall have to get s o m e
n e w stair-
dropped afraid we

me to handle it carefully, not quite

in a tafile, and told if the hand was carpets after all; o u r old o n e s are
as it wouldspoil the colouring wide enough to meetpaint on either
the
didn't
wouldn't stay, as he ourselves
moist. He said he side. Carrie suggests that we might
and fell
care much for the
smell ofthepaint, broaden the paint. I will see if we can
match

he went out.
Must get on Monday.
over the scraper
as the colour (dark chocolate)
o r else I
shall get into a

the scraper removed,

make jokes. APRIL 9
Scrape. I don't often badly. The butcher,
c e r o r v 1 u
Commenced the morning
ealled
whom wedecided not to arrange with,
uncalled-for
and blackguarded me in the most
manner. He began by abusing me, and saying

he did not want my custom. I simply said:

"Then what are you making all this tuss about

it for?And he shouted out at the top ofhis
hear:
voice,so thatll the neighbours could
Pah! Go along. Ugh!I could buy up 'things
like you by the dozen

Mr Gowing
133
 1 shut the who has only
door, and was giving Carrie to Pitt, a monkey of seventeen,
been with us six weeks, told me to keep my
understand that this disgraceful scene was
I had had the honour
Sntirely her tault, when there was a violent hair on! I informed him
n g at the door, enough to break the in the hrm twenty years, to which
of being
panels. It was the blackguard buteher he insolentlyreplied that I looked it. I gave
again, who said he had cut his foot over the him an indignant look, and said: '1 demand
Scraper, and would immediately bring an from you some respect, sir. He replied: 'All
action against melCalled at right, go on demanding. I would not argue
Farmerson's
the ironmonger, on my You cannot argue with
rurther.
xay to town, and nm any wIn

him the job of m o v rthe

ST JOD
s 0 9 e t people like that. In the evening Gowing called,
gave
Save him of
moving Seraped
and repairing the bellSthinking it scarcely and repeated his complaint about the smell of
worthwhile to trouble the landlord with such paint. Gowing is sometimes very tedious with
a trifing matter. his remarks, and not always cautious.

oAfrived home tired and worried. Mr Putley, APRIL 11

a
painter and decorator, who had sent in a
Mustard-and-cress and radishes not come up
card, said he could not match the colour on
yet. Today was a day of annoyances. I missed
the stairs. He said he spent half-a-day calling
at warehouses to see if he could get it. He
thequarteratg-nin bus to the City, through
suggested he should entirely repaint the stairs. having wordFwiththe grocer's boy, who for
the second time had the impertinence to bring
It would cost very little more; if he tried to
his basket to the hall-door, and had left the
match it, he could only make a bad job ofit. It
marks of his dirty boots on the fresh-cleaned
would be more satisfactory to him and to us
door-steps. He said he had knocked at the
to have the work done prepery consented side door with his
but felt I had been talkedifto it. Planted some knuckles for a quarter ot
an hour. I knew
mustard-and-cress and radishes, and went to Sarah, our servant, could
nothear this, as she was
bed at nine. upstairs doing the
bedrooms, so asked the boy why he did not
ring the bell. He replied that he did pull the
APRIL 10o
Farmerson came round to attend to the bell, but the handle came off in his hand.
scraper himself. He seems a very civil fellow. I was half-an-hour late at the ofice, a thing
He says he does not usually conducPsuEKEY that has never happened to me before. There
small jobs personally,but for mehe would has recently been much irregularity in the
do so. I thanked him, and went to towiAt is attendance of the clerks, and Mr
how late someof the young clerks our
Perkupp.
principal, untortunately choose this very
disgraceful
are at arriving.\ told three of them that if Mr morning to pounce down upon us early.
Perkupp, the principal,
heard of it, they might Someone had given the
tip to the others. The
be discharged. result was that I was the
only one late of the lot.

134
 APRIL 12
Mustard and cress and radishes not come uP
yet. Left Farmerson repairing the scraper, but
when I came home found three men working
Tasked the meaning of it, and Farmerson said
that in making a fresh hole he had penetrated
the gas pipe. He said it was a most ridiculous

place to put the gas-pipe, and the man who

did it evidently knew nothing about his
business. I felt his excuse was no consolation
for the expense I shall be put to.

In the evening, after tea, Gowing dropped in,

Mr Cummings
and wesat together in the breakBast-parlour.

Buckling, one of the,senior clerks, was a brick,
and I was saved by his intervention. As I
passed by Pitt's desk, I heard him remark to
his neighbour: 'How disgracefully late some
of the head clerks arrive! This was, of course,
meant for me. I treated the observation with
After a while Gowing began his usual sniffing
so, anticipating him, I said: 'You re not going
to complain of the smell of paint again? He
said: No, not this time; but I'll tell you what,
I distinctly smell dry rot. I don't often make
jokes, but I replied: 'You re talking a lot ot dry

silence, simply giving him a look, which rot yourselt. I could not help roaring at this,

unfortunately had the effect of making both of
it would
the clerks laugh. Thought afterwards
had pretended
have been more dignified if I
not to have heard him at all. Cummings called
and Carrie said her sides quite ached with
laughter. I never was so immensely tickled
by anything I have ever said betore. I actually
woke up twice during the night, and laughed

in the evening, and

we played dominoes. till the bed shook.

(Adapted from The Diary of a Nobody)

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

and Weedon Grossmith. Before

yofa Nobody is an English comic novel written by George
ron the Diary, they had careers on the stage.
fhind Charles
the daily events in the lives of a London clerk. We are supposed
to

of himself is disrupted
isown importance amusing, especially when his image
in 1888-89, the
At the time it was written, as a serial in Punch magazine
life and struggles.
growingand lots of people recognized Pooter's daily

135