What The Internet Doesn't Tell You About Giving Birth

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“You’re doing so good, sweetheart, so good,” Jason cooed as he wiped Bill’s brow with a cool cloth.

“You’re almost there, honey. Almost there.”

Bill tried to glare up at his husband but the effect was lost when another powerful contraction hit and
his eyes involuntarily clenched shut as he yelped in pain.

He’d been in labor with their twins for twenty-six hours, the last three in the dreaded transition phase.
He barely had time to take a breath after one contraction before another wracked his tortured body.

He knew he was screaming, knew he wasn’t making sense, and certainly knew he wasn’t being a man
about this but he didn’t care. All he could think about was the pain in his uterus, his back, and most
alarmingly, in his penis and balls. He couldn’t see them over his gravid belly but he knew they must be
swollen to the point of absurdity by the way everything down there felt like it was going to explode and
not in a good way.

“Oh, it hurts, God it hurts,” he moaned, turning his head into Jason’s shoulder in a vain attempt to
escape somewhere the pressure and burning and throbbing couldn’t find him.

“You’re fully dilated, Mr. Adams,” a disembodied voice said somewhere off to the side. “It’s time to get
you ready to push.”

As if saying the words made them true, Bill suddenly felt the baby moving down the birth canal. He was
so lost in his misery he couldn’t even lift his legs to help the nurses put them in the stirrups.

He had to find his voice, however, when the agony of the contractions were almost muted by the worst
sensation he’d ever felt in his life.

“Oh my God, don’t touch it,” he yelled at the top of his lungs. He let out a sob and somehow found the
strength to kick his legs to fight off the attack.
“Now, Mr. Adams, we have to tape your penis to your abdomen so it doesn’t obstruct the birth,” a
soothing female voice said from somewhere. He felt hands clutching his torturous erection and then,
when another pair accosted his straining balls, his vision greyed and he could feel himself losing the
battle to stay conscious.

Jason’s screams about their birth plan and “unnecessary medical torture” just barely registered but his
husband’s soothing voice in his ear, promising him he wouldn’t let them cause him any more pain, broke
through just as he felt the hands release his tormented appendages.

He didn’t think anything could hurt more than transition but the pressure of the baby’s head forcing a
path toward his hole was almost more than he could take. Each contraction shot a sharp pain through
his cock but the pushes that abetted that pain, ever so slightly, made it feel like elephants were
stomping on his testicles.

“Get it out, please,” he grunted even as he was forced to push again. “I need it out!”

More comforting words from Jason filtered into his consciousness before the burning deprived him of all
his other senses.

“You’re bulging, baby, almost there,” Jason exclaimed excitedly. “Open your eyes and look in the mirror,
Bill. Oh, honey, you’re doing it, look!”

Bill opened his eyes and almost puked at the image he saw in the glass. His cock was the size and color
of an eggplant and his balls looked and felt like two oversized plums ready to burst open. He barely
registered the baby’s head peeking out from his vaginal hole so shocked was he at the sudden, searing
pain in his ass.

He’d been reading about this for months. Men blessed with a vaginal opening often felt more pain in
their ass than men without but that hadn’t really registered until he felt himself being split in two with
an axe.
He screamed bloody murder, unaware of any coherent words coming out of his mouth or the work his
body was unconsciously doing, until he felt a sharp pop. He heard Jason telling him the head was out but
didn’t have time to react before the shoulders were forcing their way into the world as well and it took
all of his strength not to pass out on the spot.

Tme slowed down and his senses heightened. He heard Jason and the doctor and the nurses talking but
it sounded like they were under water.

"It’s a boy!"

"Baby, it’s our son! Oh, honey, it’s our little baby boy."

It felt like he was watching a movie as he saw the doctor cleaning out his son’s mouth and nose. Jason
beamed as their little boy, Jackson was almost certainly going to be his name, was nestled into his arms
by a grinning nurse. Distantly, he wanted to hold him too but the mere seconds of relief following his
exit had disappeared and the pain was back with a frightening intensity.

“Oh my god,” he yelped, directing all attention back to him. “She’s coming. I feel it, she’s coming, fuck,
get her out of me!”

“It’s alright, Mr. Adams, it’s almost over,” the still grinning nurse soothed. She ran a cloth over his face
and he whimpered, suddenly terrified the medical staff had no idea what he was going through.

“No, no, this is different,” he managed, “it hurts different. Help me, please, someone help me!”

He felt the doctor’s hand enter him and white spots flashed across his eyes. The fingers moved, probing
and he tried to arch his back against the invasion.

“What are you doing to me?!?! Jason, help me, they’re killing me,” he yelled, grasping desperately for
his husbands arm. He felt his hand being squeezed and he clutched back with ten times the intensity.
“Mr. Adams,” the doctor said without removing his hand, “your daughter looks like she’s going to be the
stubborn one. Her back is toward your opening so I’m going to have to turn her.”

Before Bill could even process the words he felt the doctor’s other hand enter and start moving the baby
and this, he’d now decided, was the worst ever. His moans turned to cries and then all out screams as
the doctor performed his torture.

It was too much. All too much. His insides being ripped apart. The contractions slamming into him one
right after the other. The doctor’s arms hitting his engorged, overwhelmingly sensitve cock and balls as
he worked. The crushing pressure on his prostate making that pain even more unbearable by the
second.

Bill felt his eyes rolling back in his head and he prayed for unconsciousness.

It didn’t come but he could hear the doctors and nurses voices take on a note of alarm. He saw Jason’s
face, blurry above him, and knew he was urging him to hold on even though he couldn’t hear the words.
He felt the doctor’s hands leave his body but before he could be grateful another pair landed on his
abdomen, grazing the tip of his bloated penis, and started pushing down.

It was then he started begging for death. He’d lost all ability to help get his daughter out and wasn’t
surprised when he heard the doctor calling for the vacuum followed by the sharp, probing prick of a
needle into the skin between his vagina and his ass.

The searing cut of the scalpel brought him out of his trance and his voice, somehow, miraculously,
returned.

“I’m not numb! Oh god, stop cutting me,” he cried out desperately. "I can feel everything, God have
mercy, stoooop!"
Jason looked down at him, alarm darkening his features, but the doctor didn’t seem to care. He kept
cutting the episiotomy and Bill once again had to revise his list of what was the most painful thing he’d
ever felt.

As soon as the scalpel finished its mutilation, he registered the sensation of the vacuum being placed on
his daughters head, each twisting movement tearing his already brutalized opening. The doctor started
pulling without even waiting for a contraction and the hands were back on his belly, crushing his insides
without care. Each compression sent another flash of agony through his anatomy but he couldn’t do
anything other than scream for mercy.

Then came the pop. His daughter hung there between his legs for what seemed like eternity as the
doctor removed the vacuum and cleared her passageways. Next was the pulling and the horrible feeling
of his baby girl’s shoulders ripping him for the final time.

The post birth release, as all the websites called it, caught Bill completely by surprise. He’d been half
dreading it and half looking forward to it for nine months but he never realized it would happen the
second the baby left his body.

It was the hardest, most intense orgasm he’d ever had in his life and definitely the most painful. All the
hours of baby provided prostate stimulation, all the hormones rushing down there to help with the
birth, had caused a buildup of cum so massive it had a hard time coming out at first. He could feel his
cock straining and his balls moving on their own even as he arched his back and started howling for
release.

God, this was a mixture of pleasure and pain if there ever was one. He was still contracting painfully and
the local anesthetic for the episiotomy had never actually taken effect. Each thrust into the air,
movement he couldn’t control so urgent was the force of his cum, sent spikes of pain to so many places
he couldn’t ever count them all.

On the other hand, it felt good. So, so fucking good. He’d not been aware enough -- or too focused on
other agonies elsewhere -- to realize they’d put some sort of pump on his cock and it was milking him
like a farmer’s hand late for a date. At some point the nurse, the one who never had wiped that stupid
grin off her face, had started gently massaging his swollen balls and it was both the best and worst
sensation ever. The dual sensations joined the contractions in a rhythm and when the hot spurts were
finally released he was on another plane, only able to grunt as the overwhelming stimulation launched
his body into the first throes of a massive seizure.

The last thing he remembered was the almost incomprehensible mix of pain and pleasure, the feeling of
his dick being covered with cum inside the tube, and someone holding his shoulders down as he bucked.
Then his eyes rolled back and finally, blissfully, the blackness took him.

When he awoke, he wasn’t sure how long he’d been out. It was a strange sensation at both his breasts
that forced him to open his eyes.

Jason’’s beautiful, smiling face was the first thing he saw.

“Well, hello, Sleeping Beauty,” Jason said as he moved to kiss Bill’s cheek. “Meet Jackson and Heather.”

Bill looked down at his children, his son latched onto the right and his daughter the left. They were the
most perfect things that could ever exist in the world.

“Oh, honey,” he breathed, “they’re…” He trailed off as the lump in his throat won over his vocal cords
and tears began to flow down his cheeks.

Jason wiped them away gently and granted him another kiss on his forehead.

“They’re ours and they’re amazing,” he finished for Bill. He rubbed Heather’s head before looking back
up at his husband. “So, is it true? The moment you see them you forget about all the pain and can’t wait
to have more?”

Bill looked down and realized he couldn’t have been out longer than to release the placentas because
his uterus was still contracting and a nurse, thank god not the smiling one, was stitching up that awful
incision. His ass, his cock, and his balls ached and he suddenly knew one thing the websites said was
true. He was going to be sore for weeks.
“Yeah, baby, it’s true,” he said. “I want to do it again. Multiples, hopefully more than two and another
natural birth.”

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