A Better You For Better Tomorrow

A Better You For Better Tomorrow
A Better you for

Better
Tomorrow
Sarfaraz Muhammad
2
DEDICATION
Dedicated to my younger daughter Shifa Sarfaraz - who motivated me
to collect the random thoughts which I seldomly add on my linkedin
page.
3
WRITER’S NOTE
I had never been convinced with my ability to convince others. These
words are all old, topics known to you and many of you are more
expert in several subjects discussed here. Yet, these lines are short
reminders of what we already know. My suggestion to you is to read
one article at one time only, practise it in your lives for some time and
then read the next article.
The intention is to make a better you for better tomorrow.
4
TABLE OF CONTENTS
01: EFFORTS & IMPACT -------------------------------------------------------------------- 9
02: HOW GRATITUDE CHANGES OUR LIVES ----------------------------------------- 12
03: PROACTIVE OR REACTIVE ----------------------------------------------------------- 15
04: BUILDING LASTING CONFIDENCE TAKES TIME --------------------------------- 17
05: A BAD TEMPER CAN LEAVE SCARS ------------------------------------------------ 20
06: ALL OPINIONS COUNT ---------------------------------------------------------------- 22
07: CONFIDENCE WITHOUT HUMILITY IS ARROGANCE -------------------------- 25
08: INCREASE YOUR CHANCE OF SUCCESS ------------------------------------------- 28
09: WAYS TO MOVE ON ------------------------------------------------------------------ 31
10: GETTING INSPIRATION FROM UNEXPECTED EVENTS ------------------------ 34
11: EMBRACING THE PAIN AND LETTING IT GO ------------------------------------ 37
12: DETOX YOUR MIND FOR IMPROVING CREATIVITY --------------------------- 39
13: THE POWER OF POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS?------------------------------------- 42
14: HOW TO ACHIEVE SELF-DEVELOPMENT GOALS? ----------------------------- 45
15: DOES MOTIVATION FOLLOW MOMENTUM OR VICE VERSA? ------------- 48
16: MAKE YOUR LIFE UNCOMFORTABLE --------------------------------------------- 51
17: CULTIVATING SELF-DISCIPLINE ----------------------------------------------------- 53
18: AVOID CHOKING UNDER PRESSURE ---------------------------------------------- 56
19: DIRECTION IS EVERYTHING --------------------------------------------------------- 59
20: BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND ---------------------------------------------------- 62
21: BEING A ROLE MODEL FOR YOUR CHILDREN ---------------------------------- 64
5
22: PERFECTIONISM DESTROYS HAPPINESS ----------------------------------------- 67
23: COMMUNICATION IS FOR WINNING HEARTS AND MINDS ---------------- 70
24: SOCIAL CONFIDENCE IMPROVES BY ITSELF ------------------------------------- 73
25: LEARNING IS A LIFESTYLE ------------------------------------------------------------ 76
26: OVERTHINKING ABOUT LIFE – DISTRACTS -------------------------------------- 78
27: MOST IMPORTANT FRUIT OF YOUR EFFORTS IS YOUR PERSONALITY -- 80
28: DON'T GET ENVIOUS - COST IS TOO HIGH -------------------------------------- 82
29: HOW TO BREAK YOUR OWN RULES AND WHY? ------------------------------ 84
30: JUST A SMALL ADVICE: KEEP GOING --------------------------------------------- 86
31: DRAW A LINE --------------------------------------------------------------------------- 88
32: IMPORTANCE OF HAPPINESS IN PRODUCTIVITY ------------------------------ 90
33: PATIENCE AND SILENT OBSERVATION ------------------------------------------- 92
34: TURN FAILURE INTO COMEBACK -------------------------------------------------- 94
35: BE SLOW TO JUDGE ------------------------------------------------------------------- 97
36: WE ARE IN CONTROL OF OUR HAPPINESS -------------------------------------- 99
37: BEING BUSY VS BEING PRODUCTIVE ------------------------------------------- 101
38: PLANNING: THE SOURCE OF POWER ------------------------------------------- 104
39: LIVE LIKE A FOX----------------------------------------------------------------------- 107
40: PRACTICE SAYING “I DON’T KNOW”-------------------------------------------- 109
41: EGO AND ITS TRAPS ----------------------------------------------------------------- 111
42: HOW TO INCREASE CONSCIOUSNESS?----------------------------------------- 114
43: KNOW WHEN AND WHERE TO STOP: DILEMMA WITH GROWTH? ---- 116
6
44: PATIENCE IS VITAL: DON'T BE IN A RUSH TO CHANGE? ------------------- 118
45: YOU KNOW YOUR HEART BETTER THAN ANYONE. SO TRUST IT !

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 120
46: LINE BETWEEN LEADERSHIP & AUTHORIZATION --------------------------- 122
47: NEGATIVE SIDES OF LEADERSHIP ------------------------------------------------ 124
48: EGO IS THE RIVAL OF SUCCESS --------------------------------------------------- 127
49: THE WALLS WE BUILD AROUND OURSELVES -------------------------------- 129
50: LET GO OF EMOTIONAL BAGGAGE ---------------------------------------------- 132
51: CREATIVITY CAN BE LEARNED ---------------------------------------------------- 135
52: SENTIMENTS FOR THE SOUL ------------------------------------------------------ 138
53: BE THE MASTER OF YOUR MIND ------------------------------------------------ 141
54: CONSCIOUS TECHNIQUES FOR SUBCONSCIOUS ANXIETY ---------------- 144
55: FAILURE AND INCOMPETENCE: LEARN THE DIFFERENCE ----------------- 147
56: HOW TO PLANT THE SEED OF COMPASSION? ------------------------------- 150
57: EMOTIONS THAT MATTER -------------------------------------------------------- 153
58: FACE BAD DAYS TOO --------------------------------------------------------------- 156
59: MINDFULNESS - A VIABLE SOLUTION ------------------------------------------ 158
60: THE MAGICAL POWER OF SAYING YES----------------------------------------- 161
61: USING GRATITUDE TO ATTRACT MORE --------------------------------------- 163
62: MAKE-IT-HAPPEN APPROACH ---------------------------------------------------- 166
63: WORST PHASE OF LIFE CREATES BEST VERSION OF A PERSON --------- 168
64: EMOTIONAL GAMBLING: PROBLEM WITH EXPECTATIONS -------------- 171
65: EVENTS DONOT MAKE WINNERS - HARDWORKING DO ------------------ 174
7
66: ACCEPTING ALL OF YOURSELF --------------------------------------------------- 176
67: SELECT: WHAT YOU CAN IGNORE?---------------------------------------------- 178
68: READING PEOPLE: PAY ATTENTION -------------------------------------------- 181
69: BE CRYSTAL CLEAR ON PRIORITIES ---------------------------------------------- 184
70: BE STUBBORN ------------------------------------------------------------------------ 186
8
01
EFFORTS & IMPACT
T
he correlation of effort and impact is widely discussed in the laws
of physics. Surprisingly, it holds much importance in defining
the principles of life, principles that one should standby to make
the best use of one’s time and efforts. This correlation, which is often
termed as effort impact matrix, is a well-recognized tool to decide the
amount of time and efforts required for tasks completion based on the
nature of their importance. It is used to compare the level of effort
required with the potential impact these efforts will have on the outcome
process. This tool is used by individuals as well as organizations to
efficiently manage their time and resources.
Talking about its benefits, the effort impact matrix helps us determine
what actions we should focus on and what we should quit to maximize
our performance. We define and refine our strategies and find the most
efficient path to achieve our defined goals. This simple step optimizes
our limited time and resources. This matrix also prevents the delays in
getting projects done. It helps us define our priorities, and find the best
solutions to our problems.
Let’s learn more about this tool and how we can best utilize this for our
advantage.
9
Impact Effort Matrix
The template of this matrix comprises four quadrants where the level of
effort required for a task is placed on one axis and the level of impact
after completion of that task, is placed on another axis. The scope of
these quadrants is defined as follows:
Low Effort – High Impact (Top Left)
This quadrant holds the tasks and projects that impart a significant
impact but require low efforts. This is also termed as quick wins because
maximum impact can be obtained without much extra work.
High Effort – High Impact (Top Right)
Here those activities are mentioned that we usually try to avoid because
they require strenuous efforts. However, this is the area where a lot of
progress is done. Thus, it is advisable that this quadrant should be filled
with few and to-the point targets so one can exert maximum efforts on
the things that have the highest values in life, in other words the life’s
major projects.
Low Effort – Low Impact (Bottom Left)
These are simple fill-in activities for our day to day events. Little
efficiency is needed here because the outcome impact is also not high.
That’s why they should not be on your priority list.
High Effort – Low Impact (Bottom Right)
Now this quadrant also defines our growth rate since it contains the
activities that require much effort but results in negligible impact. In
short, these are the time wasting activities which don’t lead to any
marvelous outcome. If we are desirous of making substantial progress
then this quadrant should hold minimum space in our matrix.
10
Working on this matrix every now and then can save us from a whole lot
of trouble of wasting time and resources. Simply classifying our
activities based on these quadrants can help us delegate our efforts for
the projects and tasks that hold the highest value in life. By reducing the
clutter, we can better focus and align our efforts to make achievements
possible.
11
02
HOW GRATITUDE CHANGES OUR LIVES
G
ratitude, though appears to be a simple word yet holds a whole
philosophy of life. It is a practice that fills our life with
happiness, content, and compassion. When we practice
gratitude, we start enjoying all the little things in life which were getting
neglected in our busy routines.
What is gratitude in its true sense?
It is a simple act of acknowledging all the positive things in life, no

matter how small they are. It is a healthy emotional response to all life
happenings irrespective of their nature or impact. It is a feeling of
appreciation for all the good times and staying calm and optimistic in all
the tough times.
How to develop an attitude of gratitude?
Practicing gratitude is quite easy and simple. It is about making a

consistent effort to appreciate all the blessings around us. It can be in the
form of prayers, moments of reflection, or noting them down in one’s
journal.
How gratitude impacts us?
Gratitude offers us the benefit of sound physical and mental health
12
Being grateful not only makes us physically fit but also psychologically
healthy. It empowers our cognitive health and lets us stay optimistic.
When we remain thankful for all the things we have, we find little time
to notice what we don’t have. And even if we feel anything missing, it
doesn’t affect us at all. We remain happy and content with all the
belongings, connections, and opportunities and this fills us with a
profound sense of peace. It saves us from the broad range of stress
diseases, depression, anxiety, insomnia, and apprehensions. Even in
sickness, we manage to stay calm and peaceful and this is an absolute
bliss.
Gratitude helps relationships flourish
It is well said that gratitude is one of the main pillars to maintain a

healthy relationship. When we are thankful to our parents, spouse, friend,
colleague, or any person in our proximity, we create a solid bond of
affection. They acknowledge that we love their efforts done towards
sustaining this relationship and in turn, they reciprocate this behavior.
Consequently, there comes a state of harmony, peace, and love that keeps
the relationship flexible and caring.
Gratitude enhances empathy and reduces aggression
Practicing frequent gratitude keeps us from the unhealthy and toxic vibes
we receive when we interact with negative people. Gratitude also saves
us from our own self-sabotaging thoughts and behaviors that we
intentionally or unintentionally practice. When we remain thankful for
all the smallest things even, we acknowledge their importance in our life.
In other words, we also understand how their lack can cause someone to
not behave their best. Thus, it makes us empathize with them and offer
them help. Aggression diminishes and is replaced by empathy and
compassion. Moreover, gratitude increases our mental strength and helps
us cope with all the unfortunate times and situations.
13
Gratitude attracts positivity and happiness in life
When we appreciate every good thing and accept the unpleasant things,
we emit positive vibes that create a sphere of hope, goodness, and
productivity in our life. In other words, we resonate with what we emit.
Sending out positivity attracts positivity and joy. Eventually, this makes
our life happier and meaningful.
Thus, it can be summed up with this simple quote, “Gratitude turns what
we have into enough.”
14
03
PROACTIVE OR REACTIVE
P
roactive people are those who look ahead and develop strategies
regularly. Whereas, if people respond to events as they occur,
they are natural. Reactive individuals. Proactive individuals never
make excuses; they choose their decisions and accept complete
responsibility for the outcomes. The Reactive ones, on the other hand,
find reasons to fault the situation or other people.
We can escape the burden of confusion by being proactive. We can

appreciate the job, assess our results, and make appropriate adjustments.
Being proactive increases our odds of success by 90%. Proactive people
are mostly initiators. A proactive approach entails accepting that
prevention is preferable to cure and devising solutions to potential issues.
Here are some questions we can ask ourselves to help find out if we have
a reactive personality or a proactive one.
Do our acts represent our feelings or our values?
Reactive people make decisions impulsively. They blame their emotions

on shifting situations or fluctuating moods because they lack a consistent
system of principles. Proactive people do not cause their character,
actions, or beliefs to be influenced by external circumstances. They
behave in line with their beliefs rather than being influenced by shifting
situations or feelings.
15
Do we have a mindset and a plan to put our thoughts to action?
Reactive individuals seldom have a specific set of targets or a realistic,

long-term plan for meeting them. Proactive people have a good
understanding of their beliefs and priorities, as well as a process for
achieving them.
Do we see life negatively?
Negativity, resentment, and accusing others are all used among reactive
individuals to stop accepting responsibility. Negativity is used as a
barrier to productivity for proactive individuals, who prefer to rely on
the constructive steps they may do to make a difference.
Are we involved in the blame game?
In life, there are two types of problems: one that are correctable and the
other that is beyond our grasp. Reactive people are preoccupied with
social issues that are beyond their grasps, such as other people's troubling
attitudes or situations they cannot fix. Proactive individuals concentrate
on what they can control, such as their behavior or attitude.
A type of consciousness is becoming more proactive. It entails being

conscious of anything that could be happening at any given time. We
will note how easy it is to slip back into a defensive mindset when you
practice being constructive. We will remember how many people just go
about life on autopilot. But, as in anything worthwhile, we must keep in
mind that it will not happen immediately. We've grown up in an
environment that is fundamentally reactive, and a lifetime of reactivity
has instilled deep behaviors in us.
That does not preclude us from adapting and being more constructive. It
simply makes sense to take things one day at a time, eventually achieving
a balance between reactive and constructive behavior and appreciating
the feeling of commanding our lives.
16
04
BUILDING LASTING CONFIDENCE TAKES
TIME
W
e all are aware of the importance of having a confident
outlook in making an enduring success. Confidence helps us
stand out, perform better, and make useful connections. It
establishes our position and increases our prominence. It boosts your
self-esteem and enables us to exhibit superior performance.
Despite being aware of the benefits of having lasting confidence, we

sometimes lack it. We start undermining ourselves and holding ourselves
back during public interactions. Interestingly, confidence is a learnable
trait and can be improved with practice. Let’s discuss the few simple
habits we often overlook, that can help us build lasting confidence.
Active interactions with people
The major confidence booster is socializing and participation in group

activities. Yes, we have to do it anyway despite thinking what others will
say about us. We need to show up at events and network with different
individuals. Though our urge of staying reserved will drag us back but
we have to interact. Here applies the principle of, “Fake it till you make
it.”
We have to learn how to converse decently, and how to maintain our

posture and body language to show confidence. Additionally, we need to
17
learn how to make ourselves and others comfortable. This lightens the
heaviness of the situation at hand and allows us to act confidently. Soon,
we come to the realization that others are like us and there is nothing we
cannot do or talk about. Lastly, interaction with different people and not
only our close circle of friends can considerably improve confidence.
By practicing in meaningful conversations, we will naturally gain the

momentum to act well. With practice, we can considerably give a surge
to our confidence that lasts longer.
Overcoming confidence breakers
A strong self-confidence cannot be assured unless we do not learn to

overcome confidence saboteurs. These can be external such as
narcissistic or self-obsessed people around us that try to bring others
down, or internal such as our fears and unhealthy habits (overthinking,
jumping to conclusions fast, getting scared of embarrassment, assuming
negative outcomes of a situation, etc.)
Being conscious of such confidence breakers and getting rid of them one
by one will strengthen our fragile confidence.
Encouraging self-talk
Sometimes, we become our own discouraging element when it comes to

exhibiting a confident performance. Our self-limiting perception of ‘not
being enough’ does not let us move forward. We overestimate others’
potential and undermine ours’. If we take this situation from a different
angle, it is easy to see that it is no other person but we, ourselves, are
getting in the way of our progress. And mostly we do it unintentionally.
Let’s commit that we will feed our brain with positive affirmations each
day that, ‘I am enough,’ ‘I got this,’ ‘I have limitless potential.’ Such
simple programming can considerably allow our subconscious mind to
gather courage and bring it to the surface.
18
Building self-confidence is a continual exercise that has to be repeated

on a regular basis, in day to day conversations, interactions as well as in
actions. In the words of Franklin D. Roosevelt, a former American
president, ‘the only thing we have to fear is fear itself.’
19
05
A BAD TEMPER CAN LEAVE SCARS
A
bad temper is a persistently angry attitude that all of us might
experience. It is simply a method of removing or displacing our
anger, but few consider what comes after that.
Anger is our brain's method of informing us that something disturbing

has happened to us. When we experience a bad temper, everything goes
wrong. Not only can we cause emotional and physical harm to the person
on the receiving end, but we also damage our reputation. An individual
with such a bad temper can hurt people around him. It can induce
discomfort, which can lead to a variety of health issues.
A story “Scar”:
An unknown author wrote a story related to the impact of bad temper,

which can make us realize how terrible it is to leave scars due to our
anger.
A father gave a strong fence, a bunch of nails, and a hammer. He asked

him to stick a nail into the fence with the help of a hammer whenever he
felt a little rise in his anger level due to any reason. Son started following
his dad’s instructions and interestingly on the first day he already had 37
nails on the fence. Moving forward in a couple of days the number of
nails got reduced. He got control over the fact that it is suitable for him
20
to hold his anger rather than putting effort into driving those nails into
the fence.
Eventually, a day came when he got complete hold over his anger, and
at the same time, he notified his dad about the situation. But the challenge
did not end there. His father asked him to pull out the nails whenever his
son loses his temper. Son started following the instructions again and
completed the task.
After the day when he finished pulling out all the nails from the fence,
his father asked him to notice the damage nails had caused to the fence.
Then he learned the lesson that how our words in anger can be harsh in
a way that it causes deep scars in anyone’s heart, same as present there
on the fence. Even after trying it becomes impossible for us to fix those
scars and the whole that we have created. Our words can be harsh and
this is the lesson for all of us. Sometimes we cross the boundaries and
cause damage to people in a way that can never get healed again. Hence,
we need to realize the results before going for the wrong move.
The scars exist no matter how much we apologize or how many years we
try to cover our mistakes. The verbal damage is almost as bad as the scars
on the fence. People are much more useful than an old fence. They make
us happy. Some of them have become our comrades, supporting us and
sharing our joyful and sad experiences. We need to pay back all the love
and respect to those people for the sake of humanity. We need to control
ourselves so that we never become a reason for scars for anyone.
21
06
ALL OPINIONS COUNT
W
henever we work in a space of multiple people it becomes
obvious that there is a space of many innovative ideas among
us. Especially in the field of research different strategic
opinions can help entrepreneurs, social scientists, and any service
provider to enhance their services or to start something innovative.
Everyone has the right to have an opinion; it's part of what makes life
interesting.
If a service provider or analyst wants to know whether customers are

satisfied with their or not. A product that a consumer would trust and that
will expand an existing customer, they must conduct surveys inside and
beyond their circle. Enhanced services can increase product demand.
What is nice about collecting opinions?
The benefit of gathering feedback is that we will see what they think or
do. We should simply inquire about their feedback. As a result, analysts
often use surveys to gather knowledge on how people feel about things.
What is a survey?
A survey is a questionnaire that people can respond to online, by mail,

by phone, or in person. Surveys, when performed right, include evidence
22
that scientists can calculate or convert into statistics. As a result, they can
be used to compare individuals in various locations or over time.
Surveys convert people's views into numerical values that can be

compared. Individuals that responded vanish, leaving us with numerical
data that can be analyzed statistically; it is here that our work for change
must begin. A survey could help us determine whether or not people
appreciate our services. The possibilities for counting every viewpoint
are limitless.
3 Tips to consider:
Create a sample:
Inquiring into people's thoughts and perceptions seems to be a

straightforward process. However, designing a survey that yields the
desired findings is incredibly difficult. The first step is to ask a bunch of
appropriate people first to check if the survey has any errors or misses
something.
Inquire to the point questions:
Once we have a survey, we must determine what questions to ask. The

questions must be understandable to the respondents, have correct
responses, and be testable. This implies that scientists must be able to
convert them into statistics.
There are many methods for quantifying issues. We had the option of
asking yes or no questions. Alternatively, multiple-choice questions and
the scale/pole approach may be used.
Share in trusted groups:
How can we get people to answer after having a survey and a sample in
our hands? It is difficult to get people to take a survey. Surveys are often
viewed with skepticism by the general public. Sharing within our circles,
23
as well as people engaged as customers, can be beneficial in achieving

the true purpose of the survey.
We should not be afraid of hearing everyone's opinion, but we should

also not believe that our view does not matter. A combination of the two
could be more efficient. More criticism to correct our mistakes is the way
to go. If this is the case, the relation between people in terms of opinions
would be beneficial to us.
24
07
CONFIDENCE WITHOUT HUMILITY IS
ARROGANCE
C
onfidence is having faith in our skills and striving for the best.
Internal power, self-esteem, and satisfaction are all expressions
of trust. When we trust in ourselves, you do not need the
validation of anyone. Self-assured people do not need to justify
themselves; alternatively, they strive diligently to better themselves.
They can pursue external approval, but they do not rely on it to determine
their capabilities.
We step over the line of arrogance as we insist on endlessly impressing

people with our skills. Humility is an addition to the confidence that
negates arrogance from the behavior. Humility does not mean a poor
sense of self-worth. If positive affirmations about ourselves can be used
to build trust, negative affirmations cannot be used to establish modesty.
Simply put, humility is about dwelling on the unknown rather than the
known.
Humility is pill to arrogance:
Arrogant people believe in their talents as well, but they fail to accept
the strengths and perceptions of others. They have accomplishments in
life, but they are weak and do not survive long because they have trouble
admitting blame, direction, and input from others. Most people suffer
25
from overconfidence rather than ignorance. Success necessitates

humility; without it, learning ceases to function. Humility helps us to
learn from our opponents and accept our errors in the past. Only humble
people will accept different points of view and viewpoints. "Confidence
and Humility" make an excellent combination for outstanding results.
“Confidence without humility is arrogance. Humility without

confidence is a weakness. Confidence and humility are both biblical.
And they're equally essential for living a life of true faith.”
Steven Furtick
The question of finding that balance between trust and arrogance will
still be a contentious one because most people do not see them in the
same light. That is why, if we do not want our confidence to turn into
arrogance, we must make some behavioral changes.
Adopting Approachable behavior:
Trust is useless if it causes us to become aloof or unapproachable. We

deserve to be able to strengthen and establish relationships, not make
people afraid of us. We need to make eye contact and use supportive
body language to make ourselves more approachable.
Accepting our mistakes:
It is important to remember that mistakes are common and can occur

again. However, our stance or approach will determine whether we seem
optimistic or arrogant. Arrogant people refuse to admit their errors
because they do not consider them significant. We would not transform
or fall into the pit of arrogance if we admit our faults and make the
requisite corrections. Therefore, ignorance renders one incapable of
learning, and when one is incapable of rational thought, such an
individual cannot understand.
Be Humble:
26
To be deemed confident without boasting, behave with humility when

praised for a job well performed, and accept responsibility for any
mistakes that occur.
We rarely attain achievement without the aid of others, and recognizing

the part others have taken in our achievements is a perfect way to express
trust without becoming selfish.
There is a possibility we can unintentionally cross the line between

confidence and arrogance. We should continually review ourselves to
ensure that we are optimistic without being arrogant. We must always
strive to learn about any scenario and to be aware of what is going on
around us.
27
08
INCREASE YOUR CHANCE OF SUCCESS
L
eadership qualities have a significant impact on a person's career
growth. A college degree and technical knowledge can only get
us to a limited route. We also require leadership qualities (such
as the ability to be a strong listener and communicator, to be a successful
leader) to ace our journey.
Many key leadership qualities are known as essential characteristics for

being a more successful leader. We need to regularly challenge ourselves
to improve our leadership qualities, whether it is taking the initiative,
improving strategic thinking, or learning how to inspire and encourage
people around us.
Team Management:
Being a successful leader involves strong management skills. A single

person cannot possess all the necessary skills and abilities to achieve
success. Leaders must create and guide teams with a shared mission and
aim, while also understanding and using the diverse talents of individual
team members to accomplish the best possible result. Partnerships and
teams must be sincere to be effective for both involved. Partners and
team members must have an appreciation, trust for one another, and talk
freely about how the collaboration is progressing.
Impactful negotiation skills:

28
Negotiation skills are important for successful leaders. Negotiating

business terms is important for any business enterprise. It would increase
the likelihood of achieving the desired result and generate an ideal
condition. Effective negotiating skills are one of the leadership
competencies needed to advance up the management progression and
into a senior management role.
Useful Perception:
Effective leaders go for a useful perception. They have an open and frank
working style with their teams and peers, as well as a clear
comprehension of how they are viewed. Observing their actions is a
straightforward way to test others' perceptions of us. We could be told
that we are not listening or expressing appreciation as much as we should
be. If we have created an atmosphere of transparent and truthful
dialogue, then we should be prepared to inquire about our strengths and
opportunities for improvement. Our employees would support our
efforts.
Execute concrete plans:
The most successful leaders cannot achieve success out of thin air. The
vision will never be realized until we chart a course to get there. When
we are building leadership skills, we should spend time clarifying and
solidifying our priorities. Making the best plan and establishing concrete
milestones along the way provides one with a road map to navigate for a
long time. When we reach one goal, we can go on to the next; relentless
working to hit the next milestone would offer us and our workers a sense
of meaning and pride. When we work for our goals, the types of
organizational qualities we demonstrate may speak for themselves.
When we improve as a leader in our life – whether in a technical or

personal capacity – we can bring more time towards our goals. Everyone
29
around us will notice the challenging work and commitment we bring to

the world every day, motivating them to work towards improving their
leadership skills. One of the most effective moves we can take for our
careers is to improve our leadership skills. All we need to do is to find
the guiding force that motivates us to be the greatest leader we can be.
30
09
WAYS TO MOVE ON
D
uring the tough times, it seems difficult to move on and get back
on track. However, it is not an impossible task to do. Moving
forward is a strong step we could take. Do not let life's struggles
destroy you. Do not let these adversities stop you from chasing your
goals. When life throws you to the ground, pick yourself back up. Try to
persevere in the face of difficulty and take just one step at a time.
Moving forward in challenging times can be daunting and difficult. But

our efforts can help us in the process. After a moment, we will know that
by taking one step at a time, we have finally conquered the challenges.
This write-up is going to introduce some of the ways to focus on moving
forward:
Positively treat yourself:
We know about ourselves that we have spent a lot of time in our life
subconsciously undermining ourselves. Since our weak times, we know
we want to make things better for everyone. For that, it is necessary to
deal with ourselves positively. yTreating ourselves in a better way can
open our inner eyes. We will be able to see the positivity of life only if
we are humble to ourselves. So, blaming ourselves is not a solution.
Instead, we should try to see the reality first.
Take tiny steps:

31
When we are caught in depression because of the exhausted situation in

life, we need to find something tiny to secure a winning situation for the
future. Small moves lead to lengthy journeys. Break down the most
challenging task into small sub-tasks and complete at least one of them
today. This small gesture will make us feel like we are improving and
make feared or daunting activities seem achievable. And if one of the
already divided activities seems to be too big, break it down as well !
Accept that nothing is permanent:
Unfortunately, we do not influence somethings, but we have a lot more

power over our emotional states and behavior than other people believe.
Whatever situation we are in, it is our responsibility to cultivate the
power within us. This will offer us more stability and success in all facets
of your life. We can work over those temporary times so that we can see
a bright future from our eyes. Nothing can stay for so long can be our
motivation to move forward.
Focus on present tasks:
It may feel like we cannot do anything to alter the situation in tough

times. However, there are lots of things we can focus on. When we get
familiar to practice our tasks on daily basis and focus on whatever
happening today, one little success will leave a lifelong impact
Follow a schedule:
When we see nothing is working out for us, it usually involves our
inaction. The best we can do for ourselves is to focus on our daily tasks
of improvement. Committing to work for a designated time can help us
to focus on our life; instead of worrying about our bad experiences. We
can then gradually notice our interest in our goals.
Moving on in life prevents us from being stuck. It encourages us to keep

our pace without getting swayed. Similarly, being able to move on allows
32
you to look at better challenges where some see only difficulties. Moving
on, in this way, encourages you to avoid moaning about the difficulties
and forces you to act.
33
10
GETTING INSPIRATION FROM
UNEXPECTED EVENTS
O
ften inspiration arrives readily, and other times it takes effort to
uncover. It happens sometimes that we fail to find inspiration
when we potentially work for it.
However, during rare occasions and unexpected times, it rightly hits us

as a source of inspiration. Inspiration does not just appear magically
whenever it is required. It just strikes unexpectedly.
Unexpected events cause a surprising shock in the mood. They might

trap a person to feel more anxious about the situation. However, it is the
best time to fight with a terrible situation. We just need to turn the
situation around into our inspiration. The world is already filled with
sorrows and we must utilize unexpected events as a source of
productivity.
Smartly deal with unexpected events:
Actions dictate a person’s smartness. Productive use of unexpected

events is a smart move a person can make. Here are some of the tips on
how we can turn unexpected events into a source of inspiration.
Accept the reality:
34
Recognize and embrace the fact that surprises and unforeseen events are
an inevitable part of life. Accepting this fact will make life simple to deal
with unexpected events. Life never stops and time never waits. It is up
to us to catch the opportunity on time, that life is offering. Change is a
natural process and the quicker we understand this truth, the better.
Adopt a positive attitude:
Our mindset is the key to everything. In unpredictable scenarios, a

positive mental attitude is preferable. Not all unforeseen occurrences are
bad. An issue or even a tragedy can often be a blessing in disguise. A
negative situation can spark passion, motivation, and perseverance,
resulting in progress and achievement. Before becoming enraged or
panicked, consider what happened and absorb the information. In many
situations, this is a minor issue that can be easily dealt with. What
happened was a fluke or something that can be quickly solved.
Calmly go for a second plan:
Unexpected events might become a reason for destruction. Instead of

panicking about the situation, we should always have a backup plan in
case the first one fails. This will keep us from feeling powerless, afraid
and unsure of what to do further. Wait a few minutes before speaking up
when confronted with unexpected or unwelcome turns of fortune.
Take small initiatives:
It is always good to start with small steps. Take small initiatives to make
meaningful changes in our life. Usually, in minor and insignificant
matters, do things a bit differently without thinking about it. This would
make it easier for us to deal with unexpected events and surprises. We
can teach ourselves to embrace change in this way.
Use inner strength:
35
Getting control of inner strength can help us to work for our plan. Inner
strength adds stability and better control of our minds and actions,
allowing us to deal with any situation. This can be accomplished by
honing and reinforcing our motivation and discipline, two of the most
important pillars of inner strength.
Due to being calm and fully prepared for the situation, we can stop from
getting agitated. Most importantly we can fight without losing our
composure and utilize it smartly when unexpected events occur.
36
11
EMBRACING THE PAIN AND LETTING IT
GO
W
e all wish to grow and evolve in life, but pain obstructs our
progress. Remember that the suffering we are experiencing
today is the source of our resilience tomorrow. There is
enormous potential for growth for every identified challenge. We are
required to shield ourselves from the difficulties that inhibit us from
developing in life. We deny ourselves the opportunity to deal with the
painful situation. We need to take careful actions in painful times.
However, we get demotivated this is what it makes us weak. We need to
turn our method around to learn how to deal with life's challenges and to
strengthen our will to deal with tough times.
Why should we learn to embrace the pain?
Embracing our pain has the potential to save our life. God made us with
the ability to feel the pain as well as to fight with that. The sensation of
pain alerts us that something is wrong. If we ignore the pain, we will face
a lot more pain. Hence, we should take care of our health and be aware
of the consequences of painful situations. We will get past the pain. Pain
does not go away if we consistently prevent or evade it in our lives,it will
finally outnumber us. However, when we accept it, we move swiftly
through it to brighter times.
37
Why do we need to let our pain go?
We need to let go of the pain, hurt, unmet expectations, loss, hopes and
dreams. It is a healthy way to move on. We can never continue to step
forward in our own lives if we are constantly getting bothered due to
resting pain. Letting go does not ask us to give up: letting go merely
means being able to experience something new, strong, or different .But
we must first let go.
How to Embrace the pain and let it go?
- Accept the reality:
When we feel any sort of pain, we need to first take a few deep breaths
and focus on the emotion we are feeling. Remember all the potential
causes and positive influences in our life. Examine our hearts and begin
embracing the reality rather than inflicting ourselves with pain.
- Find the reason to soothe:
Once we find out the painful aspect and the reason for it, we need to go
on to the next step. Try preparing our mind gently to embrace that pain.
Pain contains a great intensity of emotions. Once we target the reason
behind it, then it becomes easier to let it go.
- Take courageous action:
Compassion for oneself leads not only to wisdom but also to heroism.
When we embrace ourselves, including our thoughts, we not only can
determine what to do next, but we also have the confidence that initiates
from integrating our values. The more relevant we are about what we
intend to do, the easier it will be to take the critical first step.
The reality is that there is an end to every story. It can be painful at times.
Holding on to an assumption is more complicated mentally and
emotionally rather than simply letting it go.
38
12
DETOX YOUR MIND FOR IMPROVING
CREATIVITY
I
n this era of packed routines, hectic lifestyles, and the hustle to get
everything done, various detox drinks and diets have been in the
picture. They have been designed to remove unhealthy or
undesirable substances from our bodies so we can be prevented from the
harmful effects of their accumulation. But what about the brain detox?
What about the undesirable and needless thoughts that hit our minds
owing to the day-to-day hustle and interactions?
Well, it is the process of emotional detox that helps us clear such thoughts
and start fresh. It is the process of getting rid of unproductive and
fruitless thoughts. It is also important for making room for motivational
and positive thoughts to stay longer. Creativity can’t be best revealed
unless we wipe out the unnecessary thoughts and clutter from our brains.
Studies about the frequency of human thoughts, state that an average

person comes across twelve to sixteen thousand thoughts per day.
Around 95% of them are the repetitive thoughts of yesterday or the early
past. Sadly, 80% of the repetitive thoughts are negative. It implies that
we are unintentionally clouding our brains with disagreeable thoughts.
On top of that, we do not do anything to clear them unless they take a
toll on our health. This is also a contributing factor to the growing
39
number of mental illnesses including depression, mania, and anxiety

disorders.
After getting an insight into the importance of refreshing and revitalizing

the brain, the question arises; how it should be done and on what basis?
Interestingly, detoxing one’s brain is a simple and easy process but

requires persistence to see the efficacious results. All it takes is
unplugging daily, letting thoughts out, and using mind-relaxing
techniques.
Taking regular breaks from work and unplugging is the main factor that
resets the brain. For this, we have to set a specific time window on a daily
basis to disconnect from the outer world. It requires switching off all the
gadgets and spending time with oneself. Yes, it is easier said than done
but it has to be done. Also, we have to practice control over the strong
instincts of maintaining an online presence. We have to remind ourselves
that it’s ok if we miss some viral social media content. It’s ok to
disconnect to reconnect better. It is about prioritizing peace of mind.
To de-clutter the brain, it is important to properly let the thoughts out. It

can be through journaling or talking to someone with an empathetic
approach. Speaking them out or writing down the impressions and
experiences, both pleasant and unpleasant, will help us reflect better to
improve our performance and an overall outlook.
Mind relaxing techniques are a proven way to have a sound health and
better clarity. Simple exercises such as yoga, guided meditation, positive
visualization, or simple cycles of deep breaths can work wonders in
connecting us with our souls. Not only will it keep us from mental
exhaustion but also let us enjoy the marvelous beauty of nature and
serenity that is overlooked in our busy routines.
To conclude, brain detox is an essential requirement for improving

attention, focus, clarity, and performance. It also keeps us from getting
40
depressed and mentally drained. Going unplugged from the outer world,
journaling the thoughts or letting them out through conversations, and
making use of mind-relaxing techniques, are effective in detoxing the
brain and creating a state of emotional calm.
41
13
THE POWER OF POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS?
I
t is an obvious fact that emotions play a significant role in our
learning process. Thus, it is important that we learn how to harness
them to the best of our ability. It is a tried and tested postulate that
our perceived self-capability is the prime factor that affects our ability to
achieve the goals. On the contrary, if one thinks small then one is more
likely to achieve small. In other words, such phrases of encouragement,
also known as positive affirmations, help us continue despite the
challenges and obstacles of the path.
Affirmations are positive statements that are used to encourage the brain
to make the realization of such aspirational beliefs. It is a simple strategy
that can be used to feed the brain for making firm belief in one’s
capabilities. It is also essential to counteract negative and self-sabotaging
thoughts. How can we make the best use of these simple positive
statements?
Positive affirmations keep us motivated and productive
Self-affirmations made with firm conviction act as strong motivators and

push us to take action. They also help us move despites our failures. In
essence, they let us express that it is okay to fall as long as one is
courageous enough to brush oneself up. It is okay to stumble while one
is determined to take baby steps towards one’s target.
42
We use affirmations to expand our limits
Affirmations work the same as the process of visualization where we

visualize our successful outcome with all its details. Thus, writing down
the affirmative statements or saying them aloud creates a sense of
empowerment. It helps us negate our self-made limiting beliefs that
sometimes act as the biggest hindrance to our progress. When we know
that ‘we are enough, we have enough, and we can do this,’ we gradually
challenge our potential and expand our limits. Isn’t it how the legends
rise? Isn’t it how real progress is made?
Repeated affirmations increase our level of confidence
Affirming oneself from time to time that ‘I can do this, I am successful,

My opinion matters, I can lead the team, I am improving and evolving, I
am aware of my potential, I am worthy of having what I want, and similar
statements’ helps us express our best selves. With consistent practice, it
considerably improves our level of confidence. Positive affirmations are
a tool to neutralize self-sabotaging thoughts
Getting hit by negative or harmful thoughts is not an unusual thing

especially in this age of digital bombardment. However, keeping such
thoughts from gaining momentum is a challenging process. Therefore, it
is essential that we keep reminding ourselves that we are better than this.
It is important that we remember what we have achieved so far.
Such affirmations prevent us from setting on low self-esteem. They

effectively stimulate the areas in our brains that keep us optimistic. They
keep us from getting caught in the negative feelings of comparison,
hatred, or jealousy.
Referring to our ability to succeed in life endeavors, assuring ourselves

that we are capable enough is highly effective and helpful in making
things happen. Our positive self-talk is a strong encouraging factor in our
43
growth. Repeating positive daily affirmations with a firm belief can help
us create our reality the way we want.
44
14
HOW TO ACHIEVE SELF-DEVELOPMENT
GOALS?
S
elf-development is one of the prerequisites for one’s growth and
success in all areas of life. It encompasses various aspects such as
working on personal capacity, improving skill set, updating one’s
knowledge, and cultivating an aptitude for growth.
Self-development is a gradual and ongoing process that we embrace with

each passing day. It is also challenging and painful at times. It is due to
the fact that the growth is outside one’s comfort zone and stepping out
of the latter is not easy. But if we keep our focus on the big picture, we
can handle those challenges better. This is where we find wisdom and
grow substantially. In short, the self-development process is largely
governed by our mind because it has no defined deadline and we have
no one to answer to but ourselves, for making it happen.
Here are a few simple yet effective suggestions to embrace our self-
development goals with consistency and readiness.
Creating a vision for with a definitive timeline
We cannot work on our personal improvement unless we don’t envision

our successful self in a certain time period. It is important we imagine
ourselves what we want to be in a picture of five to ten years. How does
it feel when I reach there, my stronger and smarter version? Thus it is
45
vital to give ourselves an estimated timeline so that we can be persistent

in our efforts.
Breaking self-development goals into small steps
Once we have set major goals of improvement in our desired areas of

life, we need to create sub-goals. In this way, we can define our direction
and the steps we need to take to meet those goals. For example, as a
student we need to target the subjects that need improvement. This will
improve our grades which fulfills our aim of a bright career. If one is
practicing a self-destructive habit for a long time, he needs to find what
it takes to quit that and what should be done each day to be free of such
a habit.
Developing resilience
An important aspect of self-development is to develop resilience for

bearing tough challenges in one’s path. Yes, hurdles will be there but we
need to be stronger. It is possible when we see them as opportunities for
growth. With every obstacle, we need to remind ourselves that they are
there to help us grow. It is about programming our subconscious mind
so that we can tap into our true strength.
Staying consistent
It is a well-known fact that success is the outcome of persistent untiring

efforts. Without consistency, we lose motivation and get off the trail.
Remember, we cannot change altogether overnight. Incorporating new
positive and productive habits will take time. Therefore, we have to be
patient with the result and avoid procrastination. Our goal should be to
learn something new every day and get one task done on a daily basis
that can push us forward towards our bigger goals.
Rewarding oneself
46
Lastly, we should reward yourself for all small and larger wins. It adds a
feedback effect of encouragement that enables us to perform better with
comparatively less effort. We need to be our own encouragement and
treat ourselves to something amazing when we check the tasks-of-the-
day off of our list.
To conclude, self-development efforts and personal achievement go

hand in hand and following the simple strategies, discussed above, we
can achieve our personal grooming goals.
47
15
DOES MOTIVATION FOLLOW MOMENTUM
OR VICE VERSA?
G
enerally, we seek motivation to meet our goals, whether they
are our everyday tasks or massive long-term career goals. Thus,
we assume motivation as the driving force for the completion
of our worthy targets. Let’s think otherwise for a moment!
What if it is the momentum, gained after completing the tasks, that brings
us motivation to work? Well, surprisingly, it is a fact. It is the momentum
that pushes us to work with full devotion and attention. It is because
momentum is not a feeling but it is a state of action. Take it this way;
when we put efforts, no matter how small they are, in fulfilling an aim
we start gathering momentum. This is what progress is. And this progress
gets bigger and bigger when we tend to keep on going. This is
where motivation kicks in. In other words, we feel enthusiastic
to achieve more and it remarkably improves our performance.
Now the key question is how to create a substantial momentum that

drags motivation for us?
Well, there is no magic formula for this. However, some practices are
beneficial in gaining momentum and ultimately motivation:
48
Keeping an eye on the big picture:
Keeping one’s focus on the end goal is the prime factor that makes the
struggles easy. It is to note that obstacles are inevitable. That may be
extrinsic, or our self-demons that will try to distract us. But we have to
let the workflow. We have to learn to overcome challenges. We have to
avoid getting distracted. And whenever the momentum seems to break,
we have to remind ourselves why we started it in the first place.
Being comfortable in being uncomfortable:
It is a well-known fact that ‘change is hard at first, messy in the middle

and gorgeous at the end’. Thus, in order to enjoy amazing results, we
have to be comfortable to adapt to the change. We have to learn to
be active and keep going even when we do not feel like going. Yes, it
would be hard at the start but the point is to carry on. Knowing that
progress is not going to happen inside one’s comfort zone, is also a
stimulating factor to gather sufficient momentum. Sometimes we need
to hustle hard and fight with our default don’t-be-to-hard brain. But once
we get that desired level of momentum, that fight will get easier and
easier.
Learning to conquer momentum breakers:
While knowing the do’s of creating momentum, it is equally important

to know the don’ts and stay away from them. The major one is
procrastination. Yes, it badly destroys aims and routines. And luckily,
it can be avoided by a little training of mind and will power. Secondly,
one has to avoid naysayers. They are the people who neither think big
nor let others think and achieve big. If we have to let the momentum
work, we have to avoid interacting with naysayers at all costs.
To conclude, instead of waiting for the motivation to come and helps us

get things done, we should focus on taking baby steps towards our goal.
Why not make it happen with what we have rather waiting for getting
49
things aligned? Why not take a little step to create a series of actions that
can turn into the flow and help us achieve our goals?
50
16
MAKE YOUR LIFE UNCOMFORTABLE
W
e find life coaches saying, ‘If you want to grow, make your
life uncomfortable.’ Strange, isn’t it? But when it comes to a
life of fulfillment, this statement shows a profound meaning.
For a student who is going to choose his major, a start-up founder who
is failing at executing organizational plans, a beginner who is planning
his entrepreneurial journey, a mid-career professional, or someone trying
to figure out the purpose of life, all of them cannot succeed unless they
make their life uncomfortable. In short, if we are passionate to transform
our life then we must follow this strategy because all our growth will
happen outside our comfort zone.
So what does making life uncomfortable implies? It holds the fact that
we need to go beyond our limits to learn something new, something extra
that makes us a person of worth and value. It implies thinking out of the
box and making that idea a reality. It inspires one to stop resting on one’s
laurels and start repeating one’s acts of accomplishment. It also demands
us to be committed to our life goals and to be persistent in our efforts to
achieve those goals. And this applies to all areas of life.
By becoming comfortable in being uncomfortable, we allow ourselves

to discover our innate potential. We get amazed by the things we can do
which we thought we cannot do. Success does not appear just a concept
but a reality that drags to hustle more. Additionally, when we are outside
51
our comfort zone, we define our meaning of success. Because success is

something that has a different meaning for every person. When we hustle
hard and let ourselves uncomfortable, we redirect our life for good. We
don’t settle for the ordinary, rather we assess our progress to evaluate
where we succeeded and where we did not so we can improve those areas
in which we are lacking.
And the best part is, it plants in us a deep quest for growth that does not
let us settle for any less. This is a significant aspect of challenging growth
levels. This is what differentiates a fixed mindset from a growth mindset.
It enables us to embrace challenges with courage. When we are ok with
being uncomfortable, we no more fear the hurdles of our path. Rather we
consider them as opportunities for growth. We learn from them and
move to the next step of our journey with a better level of preparedness.
If we talk about the importance of accepting this uncomfortable state, we

observe that all those people who achieved greatness went through this
process. On the opposite, those who easily get downhearted by the
undesired outcome of their struggles and did not try harder, were found
lacking that long-lasting success. Thus, there is this dire need of
enhancing one’s resilience level so one can overcome the challenges of
the growth process. To get this resilience, one has to train one’s
headspace and learn how to keep going no matter what.
In conclusion, it can be said that success has a strong positive relation

with tough growth and making one’s life uncomfortable. Though it is
challenging, it is worth it eventually.
52
17
CULTIVATING SELF-DISCIPLINE
S
elf-discipline is the principal trait of all those who shaped history
for the better. If we closely observe the life of such great
personalities, we can easily notice well-cultivated self-discipline
in their day to day matters of life. This is what differentiates those peak
performers from an average individual.
At times, we feel highly ambitious and ready to accomplish our goals but
cannot seem to follow through. Despite knowing that it is important for
our progress we keep on postponing or are unable to take the second step
after taking the first one. The reason is the lack of self-discipline. This
lack can affect all areas of our life that can be health, career,
relationships, or even our financial position. Let’s learn how self-
discipline of such level can be cultivated. For this one has to;
Keep an eye on one’s routine
The first thing that we need to check for cultivating long-lasting self-
discipline, is our daily routine. We cannot change our lives until we do
not change our daily routine.
“The secret of your future is hidden in your daily routine”
Mike Murdock
53
By analyzing our routine means we should check where we spend most

of our time. What activities take the biggest part of our day? Are they
creating value in our life? If yes, how long would they matter? If no, why
are we spending our time and energy on them and how can we change
it? What should be done to alter those habits?
Incorporate healthy habits
Merely achieving a goal is not sufficient for creating a life of meaning

and joy. Self-discipline is about making every effort to learn
and incorporate good habits in one’s routine. It is about attracting
positivity and transmitting it as well. It is about making the best use of
resources that one has. It is also about creating a ripple effect of growth
and value in all the lives we touch.
Follow a pattern of result-oriented performance
In order to maintain self-discipline, we have to follow a set pattern of

exercises that bring results. There is no point in putting efforts without a
defined target and direction because they are more likely to be fruitless.
“Rough diamonds may sometimes be mistaken for worthless pebbles”
Thomas Browne
Thus, we have to carefully craft a roadmap that keeps us focused and

drives our routines around that. Not only will it help us hit our desired
target but also make us learn worth-keeping lessons of time-management
and performance efficiency.
Take care of one’s physical and mental health
It needs no emphasis that a healthy mind is found in a healthy body. It is

also obvious that we cannot stick to our well-established routine if we
are not feeling fit in all respects. This is an aspect that some of us neglect.
Being busy should not be used as an excuse to avoid practicing health
54
care such as working out or meditation. Likewise, we should also keep

watching our emotional health and take due measures to keep it sound.
In short, analyzing our routine regularly to watch futile habits and

replacing them with healthy ones, learning how to improve performance,
and taking care of our health can help us create long-lasting self-
discipline that will lead us to achieve greatness.
55
18
AVOID CHOKING UNDER PRESSURE
W
hy does our performance go down under pressure, even
when we are working on our favorite tasks? Choking under
pressure is a common occurrence that occurs in such kinds
of circumstances and conditions. Knowing where and when we choke
under pressure might be helpful so that we can work at our best when it
counts. We need to know when and how we can choke so that we can
always think of things to sort out such situations.
When we know that other people rely on our performance, we get

trapped in crucial and high-pressure situations. Surprisingly, we are more
apt to fail ourselves while we least anticipate it. Around the same time,
we must aspire to take on big obstacles in our lives. However, without
them, we may find ourselves trapped in a tight spot.
What is the main cause?
The biggest thing with pressure is that it gives us fear and anxiety. When
we have a task; a certain degree of anxiety is appropriate because it
means that our actions are making a difference. Sensible fear keeps us
alert and motivates us to better plan so that we do not make a mistake.
We are more vulnerable to lose if we do not think enough about a major
incident in our lives. It is possible that happened because we did not give
it the attention it deserved in our planning and preparations. If anxiety
levels are so high, though, they can become unstable, causing one to
56
tackle a task with a shaky attitude. We need only enough anxiety to care,
but not enough to get distracted from the main task.
What to do to save ourselves from choking under pressure?
1) Distraction:
Acknowledge that no degree of diversion can benefit us if we have not

properly prepared for the high-stress situation. This trick suggests that
we have thoroughly prepared, exercised, learned, and can behave like
magic in ideal circumstances. Stop the temptation to go over every
nuanced practice 5 minutes before the due time.
Instead, divert our attention to something else for a few minutes. We can
use our phone to play a video. Look at social media for a while. See some
food options that we can have after the big stress time. It makes no
difference if we divert our attention. The intention is to distract our
emotional energies away from what we are about to do.
2) Be confident:
Many mental abilities for success are based on confidence. Not only can
our overall results suffer if we lose faith, but we will also be more likely
to choke up. The desire to stay emotionally tough and optimistic is the
one skill that keeps everyone motivated. To become more confident, take
our time to repeat a constructive inner dialogue. Repeating optimistic
comments about ourselves will help us stay motivated during the day by
reducing the risk of losing our faith.
3) Practice:
Practice is important to win the target—and to prevent choking under

pressure. Whenever we have a job interview or test in which we want to
get successful, all we need to do is rigorous practice.
57
The stressful situation may cause harm to our productivity. It could lead
to worse performance on the mission than we need to win. Luckily,
keeping ourselves distracted, being confident and practicing can reduce
the chances of choking under pressure.
58
19
DIRECTION IS EVERYTHING
E
very step we take in our life has its own value because it can
change the course of our life. So far, people are more focused on
their actions than the direction that ultimately leads them to
suffer.
The people with a better sense of direction enjoy better mental health.
But the fact is, It is imperative yet challenging to find the right directions
in our lives. Now let’s discuss the literal meaning of direction and how
we can inculcate a sense of direction in our lives.
How can we find direction?
To find a direction in one’s life is like bringing a revolution. We can

discover a guide by focusing on values. We can never achieve our goals
without a keen sense of determination. Values and determination allow
us to reorganize our life goals.
There is a difference between direction and goals. Values are directions

instead of goals. Let’s take the example of “North” to further understand
the difference between these two terms.
“When we say that we are going towards the North, it does not mean that
the North is our goal or endpoint; rather, it implies that it is the direction
that will lead us towards the endpoint that is our goal.”
59
Taking action
One of the most critical factors that stop us from taking action is the fear
of failure. We are often not sure whether we are going in the right
direction or not. It ultimately discourages us and prevents us from taking
any action.
It is essential to change this behavior. We should learn to take action

even if it goes wrong because it provides us the opportunity to evaluate
ourselves and to see where we genuinely stand.
The importance of direction in our lives
The direction plays a vital role in our life. Every one of us follows some
directions. Some people lose their order in a certain part of their lives,
but it does not mean that they have lost their path. It implies that they
need to orient themselves again in the right direction.
The direction performs a function of guidance in our lives. It helps us to

overcome challenges and make our lives easy and smooth. Furthermore,
it enhances our mental abilities and allows us to stick to our goals. The
chances of success for a person with a proper direction are far more than
those without any direction.
The risks of the lack of direction
The life of a directionless person is vulnerable and challenging. This kind

of person has no hopes in his life. One of the most adverse effects of the
lack of direction is that it leads us to disappointment. We feel
discouraged and hesitate to participate in routine activities. It gradually
leads us towards isolation. Moreover, it also shatters our confidence and
makes our lives purposeless.
60
How to maintain a purpose in transition
Life is not as straightforward or smooth as it looks. The role of people

does not remain the same throughout their lives; instead, it changes over
time. The only thing that remains constant is value. It is essential to
evaluate ourselves and make improvements if needed. The possession of
the sense of direction motivates us to achieve value and makes our lives
purposeful.
61
20
BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND
B
egin with the end in mind is an attempt at a new framework in
the book by Allan Savory and Jody Butterfield. They have tried
to highlight the ways of decision-making and planning of life.
Beginning with the end deals with knowing your purpose and a clearer
vision of your final goals first then moving forward to further progress.
We tend to ask questions to ourselves for deciding our goals and motives
for accomplishing them are just part of beginning with the end in mind.
Such questions involve, what exactly are we attempting to accomplish?
What are the ideal objectives of our goal? What makes these results
relevant or beneficial? What makes us think about our next move?
The true essence of beginning with the end:
The essence of beginning with the end in mind is asking these questions
to ourselves. It's all about looking into the future and dreaming what life
would be like for us. People are usually inspired by the future rather than
the past, so understanding what we want the future to be can be a
powerful motivator.
The everyday pathways we create must be both attainable and practical.

Self-discipline is complicated enough as it is, and enforcing unrealistic
rules can be detrimental. A smarter strategy is to see what small
62
improvements we can create rather than large, daunting, and complicated

ones that we are impossible to stick to.
What is the importance of beginning with the end?
It might seem self-evident, but how are we going to get anywhere if we

don't have a destination in mind? If we are not aware of what we are
looking for, how can we tell if we are going to succeed or miss that
opportunity? Knowing what we want to do in the end will help us stay
motivated to achieve that goal in the end.
Adopt this habit in life decisions:
A good way to start is to consider what career we respect. Make a

description of that particular career requirement and then compare our
abilities to them. The effort to spot the gaps between the job requirement
and our skills, to achieve the knowledge of behaviors we would like to
improve, is a necessary thing to do. Looking for the experience and
preparation will get us to that place. We can consider it as an end goal
for further steps. We can evaluate what kind of help we will require to
be the best candidate for that job.
There is simply no better way to decide what we desire, why it is

necessary, and how to achieve it. We must always adopt a development
strategy that encapsulates our goals to put this concept into action in our
lives. We need to figure out what it would take to make our visions a
reality. Beginning with the end in mind would bring us a lot of joy, sense,
and satisfaction in everything we do.
63
21
BEING A ROLE MODEL FOR YOUR
CHILDREN
A
role model becomes a source of inspiration to others. We often
find ourselves as role models of our children because they
mostly copy our actions. Children are always attracted to role
models for guidance on how to act in education, in relationships, and
when faced with tough decisions. Other family, mentors, coaches, and
friends are also role models for youngsters; however, none of them
works to influence them better than their parents do. Children spend a
major amount of time with their parents on a daily basis. Hence, it is their
responsibility to become a perfect role model for their kids.
Key factors to become an ideal role model for our children:
Let us look at some of the key factors that can facilitate us to become the
best role models for our kids.
Be Encouraging:
As parents, we must respect our children's strengths and continue to

praise them for their efforts. Role models are people who carry out their
ideals in the real world. People who behave in ways that support their
values have all the respect of their children. It enables them to
comprehend how their beliefs shape who they are and how they could
pursue satisfying adult roles.
64
Be non-judgmental:
Things will be made easier when we express kindness, sincerity, and

generosity to our children. What we must do is try to get more active in
our society and meet new people. This would teach our children the
importance of not judging people based on their appearance, race, or
fashion sense. They will learn to be understanding and respectful of
others. An attempt to stop making hasty judgments often encourages
recognition of something we cannot improve.
Being a real version of ourselves:
It is crucial for our kids to know who we are, which means they should
know about our personality and how we react when dealing with life.
Every person makes mistakes, and if we have, speaking to our children
will teach them that there is nothing wrong with accepting their mistakes.
Maintaining an unrealistically optimistic self-image would benefit
neither us nor our kids. This behavior can strongly build our kid’s
character.
Listening with respect:
We need to encourage our children to be self-assured. The best way to

do this is to listen to their point of view with respect. The strongest role
model needs to pay attention, listen to their kids, and speak whenever
necessary. Listening with our eyes and ears to what our children are
doing will teach them to do the same with others.
Staying healthy:
Tolerance, peacefulness, time, and endurance are necessary for us to

have as role models for our kids, especially during their early years. Our
family is important too, but they still depend on us, for that, we need to
take care of ourselves too. Our well-being and positive attitude will let
us work out for our families.
65
To conclude, parents expect their children to have success with

everything they do. However, we may always ask what the best method
for motivating our child is. We should motivate our children by acting
as role models for them. Children begin to learn the best about their
parents, and some sensible act of being a positive role model for them
can excellently shape their potential.
66
22
PERFECTIONISM DESTROYS HAPPINESS
P
erfectionism is a state of mind in which the expectation rises to
an unachievable level. A person with such an approach lives in
an ideal "Utopian" world. But, there is no "Utopia"; it only exists
in stories.
There is a direct linkage between perfectionism and happiness. If we

want everything to be perfect, which is impossible in the real world, then
surely frustration will engulf our joy. It is like a moving target, and we
will never be able to get it. With every act of perfectionism, we make
ourselves more fragile and vulnerable.
Perfectionism; An illusion
Sometimes, we allude ourselves to the notion of being perfect, but the

reality is different. It is better to overcome this illusion. We waste the
energy in chasing these illusions. Instead, we can utilize that energy to
find other meaningful dimensions of life. It is a difficult journey and
needs much courage, but it is not impossible. We must come out of this
mental state as early as possible because these illusions will not take
anywhere but total failure and destruction. So, stop getting allude and
work to improve yourself in every possible way.
67
Perfectionism leads to overthinking
Perfectionism leads to overthinking, and overthinking makes us

skeptical. We start doubting everything that happened in the past and
assume what we could have done to make things right. It leads us to
disappointment. Overthinking makes us blame ourselves that we could
have done better, but we did not. These regrets will destroy our peace of
mind. So, it is better to let go of this habit as early as possible.
Unhealthy obsession
Many people think perfectionism is a healthy obsession, but it is not.

How can something be beneficial when it can make us doubt everything
around us? The perfectionist tends to look at everything with their
narrow approach. This narrowness leads to isolation. They do not
interact with outside people because they think others are not perfect,
and outsiders will misbehave and misplace their belongings. In this way,
they got confined in their boundaries from which escape is not possible.
It makes our life unlivable
Perfectionists seek perfection in everything. They want everything to be

perfect. But for a human being, it is not possible at all. First, they live in
an imaginative world, and they think we are perfect. On the other hand,
they also want others to be perfect. That is the second blunder they make.
By seeking perfection in everything, they turn their life into a living hell.
Even the people around them are not happy because of their behavior,
and they start to distance themselves from them.
Depression and Anxiety
The people who want to live in an ideal condition often become lonely
and sad. The desire of being an ideal person leads them to depression and
anxiety. Depression is an illness, and it has profound consequences. It
can even lead to suicide in severe cases. On the other hand, anxiety is the
68
root cause of many mental and psychological problems. These problems

can affect domestic relations to a great extent. To avoid all these
difficulties, we must tackle this so-called notion of "Perfectionism".
Perfectionists blame others for their condition, but deep down, they
know that they are the victims and the oppressors. But they are unable to
communicate because of their ego and superiority complex. Such a
person is neither good for himself nor for his society. We must seriously
consider this as an illness and try to help those around us in need.
“The essence of being human is that one does not seek perfection.”
George Orwell
69
23
COMMUNICATION IS FOR WINNING
HEARTS AND MINDS
O
ur words leave a strong impact on others. We can win numerous
hearts and minds with our way of communicating with others.
One of the most essential life skills to master is how to
communicate efficiently. Communication is characterized as the
transmission of knowledge to gain a better understanding. It may be
performed with words or through body expression, movements, pitch,
and sound. All these ways of communication are important skills for
winning people's hearts and minds. Communication skills are beneficial
in all areas of life, from work and personal life to everything else.
Let us look at the ways to enhance our communication skills for winning
hearts and minds.
Careful Listening:
Careful listening can also help to create an atmosphere in which people

can share their thoughts, concerns, and beliefs, as well as plan to fix
problems creatively. It is important to be a good listener to become a
good communicator. Active listening involves paying keen attention to
what people are thinking and clarifying confusions by rephrasing their
concerns with better consistency. This way can easily find out the path
of entering people’s hearts and minds.
70
Adaptability:
When an incident of disagreement happens between two people. It is

essential to understand and empathize with both perspectives rather than
just trying to get one’s point forward. We should never degrade those
who do not hold our point of view.
Impressive Physical gestures:
When speaking with others, it is important to have impressive body

language, maintain eye contact, make hand gestures, and listen to the
sound of the voice. A calm body posture combined with a welcoming
tone can help us to become communicative to others.
In communication, it is important to make eye contact with the other

person to show that we are paying attention to what they are doing.
However, avoid staring at the guy, as this can make another person
nervous.
Manage stress level:
On a smaller level, stress can be beneficial and motivating for us. As

tension becomes persistent and fully manifests, it can interfere with
communication, consistency of thought, and proper actions and action.
If we are anxious, we are inclined to misinterpret other’s points that can
be harmful to have a place in others’ minds and hearts. Hence, it is better
to have the hang of managing stress levels.
Be Conciseness:
Using as few words as possible to express the message. Do not waste

time with filler words; instead, get right to the mark. The audience will
tune out or be unaware about what is the topic of discussion.
Unnecessary speaking should be avoided, as should the use of
vocabulary that may be confusing to the listener.
71
Be Respectful:
Respecting and considering what people have to say is an important part

of the conversation. Giving attention to what they have to say, using their
name, and not getting disturbed are all indicators of being polite.
Respecting others makes them feel valued, which leads to a more open
and fruitful dialogue.
Effective communication skills are needed for having a place in people's

hearts and minds. Being a strong communicator will help us succeed in
our goals. It assists in comprehension and appreciation of the needs of
people around us.
72
24
SOCIAL CONFIDENCE IMPROVES BY
ITSELF
C
onfidence is somewhat about skill, about perceiving what to do
and how to do it. We set up layers of confidence by passing
through the world, experiencing and overcoming successive
challenges. Suppose the people, who are timid and face difficulty in
socializing, do not try to improve their social skills; In that case, there
are several directions their social confidence can take on its own.
Sometimes, it gets enhanced on its own, and other times it deteriorates
even more. There are several things one could practice that could lead to
their public confidence improving over time.
Be more social
Exercising confidence in community-based situations is an essential

chance to gain social comfort level. Over time, one's social skills will
grow and be upgraded, helping to acquire more confidence. Putting
ourselves in social situations like hosting a monthly party, talking with
strangers, or signing up for a class, will help us to be more comfortable
and overcome our anxiety (if one has any) over time.
Take Action
Our social confidence can get better over time if we are willing to take
action. Instead of just avoiding public events and staying at home, we
73
can boost our morale by exposing ourselves to others. If we begin

working deliberately, it will not only polish our skills but also enhance
our confidence.
Spending time with confident Friends
"You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with."
Jim Rohn.
A company does affect people in many ways, be it positively or

negatively. If we spend our time with confident friends, it automatically
inculcates confidence in us, and we become socially comfortable over
time.
Volunteer to make a speech
When we volunteer to make a speech in public gatherings or any other

such event, it helps us build up our confidence. Participating or
volunteering in activities one likes doing can help reduce feelings of
inadequacy when meeting new people.
Engaging Other People
One way to boost one's public confidence boost is to introduce them to

other people in a way that interests them and makes them feel valued and
heard. Making other people feel heard and valued is known as the skill
of social competence. Improving social competence boosts positive self-
perception during a communal situation since you are more likely to
reach out to other people.
Exploration
If one is a kind of person who explores and experiences everything

deliberately, he is more likely to improve his public confidence. For
instance, doing groceries and talking to the employees, going to the
74
movies and restaurants, and putting the order by oneself help a person to
polish their social skills.
Dealing with Criticism
A kind of person who knows how to use criticism as a learned experience

is likely to be more socially comfortable than a person who cannot handle
criticism. One's social confidence improves if that person is assertive
when he receives criticism and does not become defensive.
Express compassion for others
If you exhibit compassion towards others, you will create a positive

environment while interacting with other people. The more positive
social communication you have, the more you could enhance your
confidence.
Build up nonverbal communication through body language.
Acquire body language that transmits confidence, such as power poses.

Researchers have shown that power poses can enhance your confidence
and make you appear comfortable and enjoyable.
75
25
LEARNING IS A LIFESTYLE
L
earning is not limited to schools and colleges. We can continue
learning even when we have graduated from university because
learning continues throughout life. We can take advantage of e-
learning in the form of our daily experiences of life. Life teaches us better
than anything else. We can learn new skills and strategies anytime in our
lives. All we need to do is never stop our learning process.
“The world is a university, and everyone in it is a teacher. Make sure

when you wake up in the morning, you go to school.”
T. D. Jakes.
Why should we never stop learning?
There are many reasons for having the motivation and never stop
learning. It can continuously help us become a better version of ourselves
with many benefits attached to it. Let us look at some of the reasons to
get the motivation to continue our learning process.
Keep yourself updated :
Remain updated and informed about current events, innovations, and

other relevant issues is essential to continue learning. It does not only
keep us updated but can also support us in our professional and personal
lives. We can acquire expertise and information that can be shared and
76
implemented in several circumstances. It also provides opportunities for

development to show our inner interest in learning new connections that
are helpful for the long run. We should keep ourselves up to date and out
of the shadows while continuing to learn.
Removes Boredom:
Boredom can be a disturbing feeling. If we wish to eliminate boredom

from our lives, we must commit to lifelong learning. There is no doubt
that keeping ourselves busy is one of the most effective methods of
killing boredom.
Whenever we experience boredom, we get stuck with useless feelings

for quite a long time. However, when we continue to learn. We will have
a responsibility of commitment that will help us to mitigate that
boredom. Without any learning or working commitment, we will get
stuck in boredom again. So, it is better to have a focused vision to make
our moments as productive as possible. We will notice some positive
changes in our lives with it.
Maintains passion:
No matter how much we enjoy our work, there will be days when it feels
like a hassle, but continuous learning is the secret to hold our passion
alive in the long run. Sparking that passion would only serve to keep our
careers interesting. As a consequence, we should go forward and stress
about our field. The brilliant stuff going inside would motivate us to tap
into our inner enthusiasm.
Learning is a never-ending thing in our life, and we get to learn so many

things during every moment we spend in our life. It motivates us to
become a better version of ourselves. As a result of the non-stop learning
process, we can never give up on our goals. Not only that, but it also
provides us the opportunity of spending some quality time.
77
26
OVERTHINKING ABOUT LIFE – DISTRACTS
O
verthinking includes stressing about situations in which you
have no zero to no influence in your life. It can be in the form
of excessive thinking about traumatic-past experiences. Our
thoughts can harm us in a way that none of the other things can. They
can be particularly distracting and dangerous for us. Thoughts before
making a decision are essential; however, these thoughts can destroy our
focus from life too. Even sometimes, we can even hear rapid debate and
feedback in our heads. If we are habitual of overthinking, then a simple
situation can result in a bad outcome. It may lead to a terrible situation,
and we can quickly stick in a destructive mental loop.
Overthinking may result in stress, depression, or maybe anxiety, even

though it isn't technically a mental health condition. Our pessimistic
feelings trap us in a bad mood to distract ourselves from current
moments. We need to focus on our lives. For that, we must find some
ways to fight this curse. Let us look at some ways to neglect moments of
overthinking so that we can keep our life on track.
Finding distraction:
Our idle brain is one of the highlighted causes of overthinking! If we

don't use it for a solid reason, it will start creating thoughts that can
distract us from life. So, whenever the overthinking process begins, we
should immediately distract ourselves. We need to engage in an activity
78
that is worth our time. There are many common and engaging ways to
divert our attention. We are fine as soon as we are enjoying our
distraction. It can be any activity such as cooking, baking, writing,
exercise, etc.
Replacing Negative thoughts:
When we learn to see ourselves during the overthinking process, we will

notice that our minds often contain pessimistic proclamations. Negativity
only helps to encourage overthinking, so it requires prevention. That is
why it should get turned off to balance the practice of optimistic
affirmations. We need to look forward to positive thoughts, which will
keep us away from overthinking.
Controlling emotions:
We need to keep in mind that feelings can obstruct our capacity to see
things critically. We should always keep our eyes open to review the
truth. It's not constructive to concentrate on the problems; instead, it's
beneficial to search for answers.
Everyone can easily get involved in overthinking. However, if we have

a good strategy in place for coping with it, we can at least divert some of
the gloomy, nervous, and exhausting thoughts into something
productive, constructive, and efficient. Since we can't have both a
regretful and a thankful feeling at the same time, then why not take the
time to think positively?
Proactive and generally helpful thoughts are beneficial for life, including
thinking about the right way to approach a dilemma, setting personal
targets, and becoming informed about a new idea. This type of thought
produces positive results. We think of an idea, imagine a goal to strive
for, or obtain new knowledge instead of wasting time due to
overthinking.
79
27
MOST IMPORTANT FRUIT OF YOUR
EFFORTS IS YOUR PERSONALITY
S
uch moments come in life when we see that our whole struggle is
going in vain. We feel that our attempts are going fruitless and
our destination goal is moving further away instead of coming
nearer. Such moments make us question, what should be done? Should
we keep trying or should we quit? Should we try harder or should we end
striving? Are we going to get any benefit out of these continuous
struggles which apparently seem ineffective? Let’s see how champions
deal with it.
Thomas Edison, the great man who needs no introduction, said "I have
not failed. I have found 10,000 ways that do not work." New York Times
bestselling author Gena Showalter says, "Giving up is the only sure way
to fail." Likewise, Bruce Lee says, "Do not fear failure. Not failure but
low aim is the crime. In great attempts, it is glorious even to fail."
Nelson Mandela once said, "Do not judge me by my successes. Judge me

by how many times I fell down and got back up again." They all point
towards the undeniable significance of failing in reshaping one’s
personality.
80
"It is impossible to live without failing at something unless you live so

cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all, in which case you
have failed by default." ― J.K. Rowling
Lessons to take home:
From these definitions, we can devise a sound conclusion of the ‘failing

attempts’ in that they play a prime role in making one’s personalit y
worthwhile. Our failures are our biggest teachers. They serve as the
guide to our new way of perceiving and performing. Because when we
win at something we learn the one way that works but when we fail, we
question every step, every effort put in that process. We modify our
existing ways. We improve our overall personality. This is how we learn.
This is the cornerstone of development and growth.
So, it is not the end result but the process that teaches us the biggest
lessons of our life. It is the journey of our efforts that make us who we
aspire to become. Let’s commit to this cause. Let’s commit to trying
again, this time better than before. Because this is how we discover our
hidden talents. These tough endeavors help us uncover our innate
potential. They help us determine what we are capable of and how far
we can go. Also, it helps us improve in all areas of our performance. Our
personality develops and helps us gain an eminent position in society.
All we have to do is to trust the process. We have to learn patience,
persistence, and preservation of integrity. We have to hold a firm
conviction in our resolution and honest efforts.
Let’s cultivate an unflinching determination that our struggles will work

out eventually. The result can be different from our perceived outcome
but they will work best in our favor. After all, our groomed personality
is the most important fruit of our labors.
"Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising every time we
fail."
Confucius
81
28
DON'T GET ENVIOUS - COST IS TOO HIGH
E
nvy is defined as a feeling of resentfulness, mainly due to the
qualities and possessions of others. These qualities and
possession can be different. Sometimes, these are the physical
possessions that make us envious of someone or something, e.g., better
financial life and assets. Sometimes, it is the emotional side of human
psychology that makes a human envious of other human beings. A friend
has a healthy relationship, and when we look at our poor vibrant life, we
envy them. This kind of behavior is dangerous for human beings and
society as well.
Remember, no one is perfect:
Most of us are following someone who is living a better social and

financial life. We are following them on social media, and maybe we are
envious of a relative or a neighbor. But they all have their imperfections.
They only portray the positive side of their lives in society. When we
understand that no one is perfect and the seemingly perfect lives of
celebrities and people around us have their shortcomings too, it will be
easy for us to let go of this habit.
Envy destroys financial life:
Let me explain it with an example here. A neighbor buys a new supercar,

and we have an old car in our carriage. Envy will make us buy a new car.
82
The problem starts here. We will go to every extent to compete with them
and to have that luxury in our lives. We will go for a bank loan to buy
the car without thinking that we have to return the loan with interest. It
will destroy us financially and make it impossible for us to live
peacefully.
Envy costs peace of mind:
Envy suppresses our ability to think and act in the right direction.
Envious people are blind to their abilities. They try to become like others
and want to attain what other people already have. In this way, they do
not see the potential within them. It will make them doubt their whole
being. Envy leads them to depression, and ultimately they lose their
peace of mind. A person who wastes time worrying about other's
progress would get nothing.
Inferiority complex :
Envy is both cause and result of an inferiority complex. When we see a
flourishing colleague in financial and social life, we become envious of
him. It makes us think that we are not good enough. We do not have the
required abilities to meet their level. It leads us to an inferiority complex.
Inferiority complex leads to envy. If we are suffering from this disorder,

we will think low of ourselves. It will naturally lead us to envy the people
who are in better conditions.
Envy is a poison
Like every other character flaw, envy directly destroys our lives. It
makes life a living hell because we are constantly thinking about other
people and their achievements. It poisons our relationships with our
family and colleagues. Be aware, do not let envy eat up our peace by
poisoning our thoughts.
“Envy was one of the most potent causes of unhappiness”
- Bertrand Russell.
83
29
HOW TO BREAK YOUR OWN RULES AND
WHY?
S
ome say rules are meant to be broken. Others say we should
follow the rules. We have to keep in mind that both give valid
arguments in their favor. After all, we are living in a society, and
we are supposed to make it better.
Breaking rules is considered taboo in our society. We are not allowed to

go beyond what is considered normal. But here in this blog, our focus
will be on breaking the standards we set for ourselves, not those
determined by society.
More often, we set goals to achieve particular objectives. We prepare

ourselves a set of rules to make sure everything will go smoothly in the
right direction. That is necessary in most cases. But to achieve what is
beyond our limits, we have to come out of our comfort zone. Because
rules we make for ourselves keep us in that specific circle and do not
allow us to cross the boundary line of our sanctuary.
Remember, there are no fixed rules.
It is the first step towards breaking our own rules. Remember that
nothing is constant. Change is the only constant in nature. Then why we
have to build imaginative walls around ourselves that only drive us into
despair. If the rules do not bring the desired objectives, then why not
change them? The only problem we face is that these are the rules made
84
by us for us. But we have to keep in mind that we are not "Pro". We are
just human beings with many flaws. We have to acknowledge that we
have done something wrong when setting standards for us. When we
know it, we can change it.
From an early age, we are taught to follow the rules. Do not talk to
strangers, look at both sides when crossing the road, and many more.
From early childhood, We become the slave to the rules. The idea of
subjugation becomes permanent in our subconscious. There is a famous
saying in English that "Child is the father of man". We all are the
products of our childhood. It is why most people find it difficult to break
their own rules because they are incarnated in our nature that breaking
rules will bring no good, and it is harmful to us and our society.
Why Break Rules?
Multinational companies break their own rules to fit into the market and
get desired goals. If we are not getting what we want, why should we
stick to the existing rules? It is insane to even think in this ever-changing
world, where everyone is changing tactics to reach their dream.
“You don't learn to walk by following rules. You learn by doing and by
falling over.”
Richard Branson
We are often stuck in a difficult position, despite applying every possible

remedy. When rules are not providing us with anything beneficial, then
break them. Do not be afraid. They are just rules made by us, for
ourselves. We can have new rules according to needs and conditions.
They are to assist us, not to create restrictions. When it feels that rules
are the hindrances, we have the right to surpass such obstacles and make
our way towards a bright future.
85
30
JUST A SMALL ADVICE: KEEP GOING
W
henever we get exposed to difficult situations, we
automatically think that the world does not want things to go
right for us. It induces a sense of irritation, anger and during
worst-case scenarios, people experience suicidal thoughts due to severe
anxiety. Life can be difficult and will never stop for anyone. That is why
we should keep our heads up and keep moving forward with our aims in
mind.
The unforeseen situations can come at any spot in our life. However, if
we want to make the best of our lives and be successful, we must learn
to believe in ourselves and get through whatever obstacles stand in our
path to keep moving forward. Fighting with our fears and blockages can
be one of the solutions. Let us figure out how we can keep moving
forward in life.
Consider life as a journey:
With an ideological basis, we should realize that life is a journey where

there is no destination because it keeps moving. The major reality about
life is that we can face it in the form of a journey. The journey itself is
enjoyable, filled with lots of lessons on our way. To take joy in the ride,
to learn from it, but not to fulfill it. It is never only about learning from
critical times but also about continuing our lifelong learning process. We
should keep going as long as we see satisfactory results.
86
It is fine to feel things:
Feeling our emotions is not a wrong thing. We can mess things around
us and can make mistakes. Even when life seems perfect, there are still
some bad days in our lives, which will certainly make us stronger. It is
perfectly appropriate to let go, sob, and collapse. There will be moments
that we break and drop to the bottom, but that will not be the ending of
our adventure.
We will steadily raise ourselves from the lowest point, and we can learn
to walk straight like we once did. Even as something is incomplete and
meaningless, there is still hope that things will improve. Broken things
are replaceable, and wounds are healable in life. So, we should keep that
as motivation.
Nothing is permanent:
We need to accept that what we are going through right now is not going
to last long. Unfortunately, there are certain aspects over which we have
no authority, but we have much more influence over our moods and
attitudes than other people may believe. Whatever situation we are in, it
is up to us to cultivate our inner power. It will help us achieve greater
peace and prosperity in all aspects of our life.
Whenever we get distracted from moving forward during the downs, we

should encourage ourselves. Our emotions, actions, and decisions can
turn many trends. We are not here to lie passively in the face of adversity.
We will climb higher and grow better than ever if we keep going.
“Believe in yourself, take on your challenges, dig deep within yourself

to conquer fears. Never let anyone bring you down. You gotta keep
going”
- Chantal Sutherland
87
31
DRAW A LINE
B
alance is important in life. Tipping the scales to one side will
always cause some problems for the other side. The same
principle applies to work-life balance. This type of balance is all
about keeping our personal and work lives separate. Both are equally
important, we need work to sustain ourselves and afford different things
while we also need to live life to the best extent. It may seem hard to
keep them apart but we can work things out and draw some boundaries
to keep ourselves sane.
Our physical and mental health, creativity, productivity, and happiness

all depend on how efficiently we maintain this balance.
Why maintain work-life boundaries?
It keeps our health in check. Being overloaded with work, or

experiencing procrastination in completing it could lead to stress, which
can lead to other complications such as illnesses or mental health
problems. One of the common problems associated with an over-burden
of work is burnout. This can occur when a lot of pressure accumulates
due to work, causing reduced productivity and motivation. Moreover,
not all employers place an emphasis on the mental health of their
workers. So a healthy balance is required to keep us peaceful and happy.
88
We can give time where needed. When at work, we can completely focus
on our tasks and get them done without too many distractions. While at
home, or over the weekend, we can spend time on other parts of life.
Focusing on family, friends, and ourselves is important too, without any
worry or stress about being behind at work. This can only be possible
when both work and life don’t cross over each other.
We become more productive and creative when doing any work or

home-related task. When we are feeling fulfilled, positive, and happy,
we automatically become better at solving problems in general.
A few tips for a push in the right direction:
We can take some measures by ourselves to uphold the balance:
Taking breaks: Taking a few short breaks during the day is more
beneficial than working non-stop.
Going on vacations: We can go for a short vacation alone or with family

and friends. Blowing off steam while completely away from work helps
immensely.
Working during work hours: In this age of technology, it might be hard

for us to keep our attention away from work. However, it is necessary to
separate work and personal life. For example, we can opt to not answer
any work calls during the weekends.
Maintaining a social life: We are social creatures. Connecting with

others can help us get a breath of fresh air from both life and work.
Creating a work-life balance is good for us and others around us. We

should remain in control, set our own boundaries, and stick to them. At
the end of the day, it all boils down to us. There is no one-size-fits-all
solution to creating a balance, so we should try different things to see
what works for us while considering our capabilities too.
89
32
IMPORTANCE OF HAPPINESS IN
PRODUCTIVITY
I
n the workplace, or even outside of it, happiness is important. It can
affect our ability to work either solo or with a group. Those
employees that are happy tend to work harder, show good
cooperation, and are highly productive. If we just get up, go to work, do
the same thing every day and then go back home, we are more likely to
be unhappy and unsatisfied with our lives due to a robotic schedule.
When we are happy, our creativity and willingness to work reach a high
level. This allows us to complete our work more effectively and gives us
a sense of accomplishment. Instead of putting the minimum amount of
effort to stay afloat, we invest our energy into our tasks.
What is the link?
There is quite an important correlation between happiness and

productivity. When we have things to worry about, our performance
automatically drops.
Here are four things we see when we are happy at work:
A Positive Attitude:
When we are happy, we inspire positivity. Not just within us, but in those
people who are working around us. A positive mindset boosts morale
90
and makes us more focused and enthusiastic about our work. On the
contrary, when we are upset or troubled about something, it affects our
motivation to work.
Greater success:
In an environment where everyone is satisfied and happy, including the

employers, we generally see more success. Being happy makes us more
confident in ourselves and improves our performance. Managers and
employers who appreciate their workers further fuel their self-esteem
and happiness. This increases cooperation between the whole group.
More encouragement:
We prefer interacting with happy people rather than angry or disgruntled

ones. This is because happy people are a source of inspiration to others
around them. We find ourselves being encouraged to try new things and
improve our work performance as a team.
Improved performance:
We feel more motivated and dedicated to our tasks at hand when we are
happy. When we are unsatisfied due to any reason, it affects our
thoughts, mood, and self-confidence. This in turn, negatively impacts our
performance.
Being happy in life can allow us to grow as a human and as a member of

society. It makes us passionate about our work. It is not rare to find
people who are tired of their jobs and want to quit but are unable to.
Loving the work we do makes us happy, which, in turn, makes us more
productive.
91
33
PATIENCE AND SILENT OBSERVATION
W
e all have listened throughout our lives that patience is
essential. But what exactly is it important for? Here we are
going to unfold the new dimensions of this fact. The practical
use of patience in our lives can turn it into heaven. No one will teach us
patience. It is the art we have to learn through time and experience.
“He that can have patience can have what he will.”
- Benjamin Franklin
Silent observation allows us to look deep into our surroundings and to

unfold many hidden realities. If we speak less, there are lesser chances
that we talk about nonsense. It will make you look more intelligent. A
silent person who observes workplace situations and speaks when
needed makes the person more popular because people around him want
to hear from him and value what is being said.
Patience and silent observation are like two sides of the same coin;
without one, we cannot execute the other because only a quiet person can
remain patient and vice versa. Both, when combined, have the power to
transform an individual completely.
Patience and Silent Observation makes us wise
92
Wisdom lies in patience and silent observation. An individual with

evolved abilities has greater control over the situation. It prepares us to
face the harsh realities of life. Those who understand the importance of
patience remain calm in situations where it is not easy to wait. It gives
us the courage to face the worst. Those who have been through the worst
have indeed developed vision than the ordinary folks.
Observational skills make us wise in the sense that we can see what
others do not. We can see the gaps and have the chance to fill them.
People often ignore the minor details. But these details are the key. They
have a huge impact if we take them seriously. A silent observer knows
how to get tremendous results from taking some minor precautions.
Patience and Silent Observation at workplace
Patience prepares us to focus on long-term strategies. Only those who

have enough patience can take a risk when it comes to corporate
business. Such people who take measured risks are the people who enjoy
the fruits of their patience. There is another perspective we should talk
about. It transforms our relationships as well. At the workplace, we can
have a better relationship with our colleagues if we listen to them. It is
not necessary to react constantly. Wait for the tables to turn. We will get
our chance to tell our perspective. Patience teaches us to listen to people's
needs.
Silent Observation makes us sharp.
We judge our surroundings and make a hypothesis followed by a quick

decision. The decision then helps us to tackle the problems at a much
faster rate. In this way, we can progress very fast at our workplace.
Opportunity only once knocks on our door. The person with developed
observational skills knows how and when to grab the opportunity. It can
help us to get promoted. It also allows us to get the dream job.
93
34
TURN FAILURE INTO COMEBACK
W
hether we are going to start a new journey or trying to
improve our lifestyle, one thing we cannot avoid is a failure.
Behind every achievement, there is a series of setbacks. Only
those who can meet their destinations set aside all the failures and never
give up. This famous quote of Henry Ford best explains what failure is:
“Failure is simply to begin again, this time more intelligently.”
In the light of the above quote, one can infer that failure is basically a
motivational force that inspires people to stand up again, gird up their
loins, and come back with more enthusiasm and improved strategies.
We should practice following things to turn our failures into remarkable

comebacks.
Learn from the mistakes:
The first step to turn a setback into a comeback is the willingness to learn
from our own mistakes. It is not bad to make a mistake, but trying not to
improve it is the worst thing one can ever do. If we study the lives of the
most successful people, we will be surprised to know that they have
made more mistakes than normal human beings but what made them
successful is that they learn from their mistakes. Many publishers
rejected the famous novel Harry Potter. People mocked JK Rowling, the
94
author of this remarkable novel. Instead of blaming the publishers,

Rowling improved her mistakes and kept trying.
After a series of rejections, finally, it got approved and touched the height
of popularity all over the world.
Looking at the failures through different lenses:
We often encounter two types of people in our daily life. The first one is
those who make mistakes, and instead of trying again, they consider
them as their destiny and stop further trying. These are the people who
can never achieve something big in their lives.
Contrary to this, there are some other people whom failure can never
demotivate. They look at their failures from different perspectives.
Instead of mourning, they try to learn a lesson and come back with better
strategies. These are the people who have all the capabilities to turn their
failures into a comeback story.
Always keep in mind a backup plan:
We can keep the damages of failure to a minimum by following our

backup plans. It does not mean that we should stop trying after failure,
but if our plan is not working after several tries, it is good to have a
backup plan.
Consider all the possible scenarios:
It is the dilemma that we only consider one scenario before starting

something new. Therefore, we get dejected or lose hope upon not getting
the desired results. A wise person is the one who strives for the best but
prepares for the worst. We should always keep in mind all the possible
consequences before starting anything new. Keeping the end in mind can
minimize our burden of failure and helps us to move on to change these
setbacks into success. If we only look at our brighter sides, there are
maximum chances of dejection in the end.
95
Therefore, it is imperative for us to consider all these above mentioned

steps to turn our failures into a comeback story.
96
35
BE SLOW TO JUDGE
W
hy is it so easy to impose judgments rather than receive
them? Why is it that we are not tolerant of how people are,
what they want to do, and whom they want to be? First
impressions are set in stone. Everyone is a target of harsh and cruel
judgment these days and no one is spared.
Unfortunately, we live in an unforgiving world but slowly and surely we

can bring a positive change. That is only if we let go of our quick and
critical judgments. But to find a solution to any and every problem in this
world, we must first identify the problem. The main problem is imposing
quick negative judgments on others but why are we even doing this?
Important for survival, the human mind forms a judgment in as few as

seven seconds. The design of the mind is not the problem here, the
problem is treating one's quick judgment like they are facts. To be
honest, these are only our opinions. Imposing opinions as facts onto
others with harsh treatment, calling them names, back-biting is what is
causing a rift.
Pointing to insecurities and problems within others rather than ourselves

is easier. These are jealousies and insecurities that we project on others
making them feel bad and is a type of defense mechanism.
97
However, imposing unsolicited judgments on others helps no one and

often has negative consequences. So, we should be slow to judge, and
here are the reasons why.
Imposing quick judgments ruins relationships. What can blossom into a

beautiful sincere friendship can end up in a bitter rivalry only because
one chose to be quick in their judgments. The important thing here is that
it is in our hands to make the world around us a better place through our
actions. We can choose to be quick in our judgment or be slow and
lenient when forming impressions about others.
Everything is not what it seems, before judging someone and their

actions, one very important thing to keep in mind is that there are two
sides to every story, and a completely different perspective and context
are awaiting those who are tolerant enough to give people chances and
avoid negative situations. Unless one has certain insecurities that they
need to work on, they would not be hurting others. We need to learn to
accept others the way they are and work on ourselves.
Regret the most negative and useless feeling in this world. It is useless
because it is linked with the past, something we cannot change. It is
avoidable if we make the right decisions. Indeed, sometimes things are
not in our control but hurting others and being intolerant is the choice
we, unfortunately, make sometimes.
It is all right to form first impressions but sticking to that judgment alone
and projecting negativities is not acceptable. Yes, it hurts the other party
involved but it also ruins one's mental peace. It is a double-edged sword
and it is time for us to put the scabbard on this dangerous blade once and
for all.
98
36
WE ARE IN CONTROL OF OUR HAPPINESS
H
appiness is a wonderful emotion. In the world of today, it is
something most of us crave for. We often attach our happiness
to our environment, to people, and material things such as a car,
house, or the latest gadgets. However, we never try to find happiness in
ourselves. Linking this emotion to the outside world makes us
vulnerable. When we lose those things, we lose our happiness. This
shouldn’t be the case, because our happiness belongs to us. It is our
responsibility.
How can we find our happiness?
Taking time out for favorite hobbies:
No matter how busy we get in our daily routine, we should always try to
take time out for the things we love doing. Hobbies are usually
something we enjoy doing, so spending time on them could lead to a
positive state of mind and influence our happiness. It could be anything,
such as watching movies, car detailing, or swimming. The bottom line is
that whatever it may be, we are content when doing the things we love.
Loving ourselves:
When we bombard ourselves with negative thoughts, we lower our self-

esteem, confidence, and self-worth. This, in turn, affects our mood and
99
mental peace. It also affects our relationships, because we can’t love

others properly if we don’t love ourselves first. There is nothing wrong
with putting ourselves first sometimes. We should show ourselves the
same level of kindness and gentleness that we show to others.
Developing a positive perception of ourselves makes us satisfied and
happy.
Finding joy in small moments:
Life is full of things to offer. Sure, a huge promotion or a new house can
make us feel joy, but happiness can be found in the little things as well.
It could even be something as small as making a good sandwich or seeing
a beautiful butterfly while on a walk. Appreciating such small things
makes us feel more grateful and doesn’t make us link our happiness to
big events only.
Taking care of ourselves:
Keeping our physical health in check can also bring positive mental
health effects. We can start cycling, jogging, or join the local gym,
among other options. When the kind of exercise is something we like,
we tend to stick to it longer. Regular exercise positively influences our
mood and reduces anxiety.
It is hard to find someone genuinely happy these days, but not

impossible. We are constantly mixed up in one thing or the other in this
fast-paced life, always being worried or anxious about something.
However, being happy isn’t complicated, even though it might seem that
way. It can be made simple but that depends on us. We should try to find
our happiness, independent of what’s going on in the world.
It is completely okay to be down sometimes because life isn’t a movie.

Accepting life for its ups and downs is necessary before we can adjust
well to it. We should realize that we are responsible for our happiness
that is free from the control of our environment.
100
37
BEING BUSY VS BEING PRODUCTIVE
I
t seems that currently, no one has any “free time” . We show up late
for work and return home late. We are constantly running here and
there but still lacking inner peace. During our so-called busy days,
everyone feels like they are falling behind due to many distractions. We
need to work on our efficiency. For that, we need to be productive rather
than being busy with random stuff all the time.
Many people become successful in controlling their day rather than

serving themselves all the time. We should motivate ourselves to be
more efficient and productive too. We need to try to make the most of
our time to be the most useful, rather than simply keeping ourselves busy.
The distinction between being busy and being productive is essential to
notice.
But we can focus on few things to see if we are being productive or just
busy working all day:
● Constantly feeling annoyed, furious, and dissatisfied.

● Unable to find a to-the-point solution.
● Exhausted from running here and there, but nothing on the list of
tasks list is completed.
● Scared of taking leadership positions
● Being late at work and then returning late at night to finish more of
the work.
101
How can we become more productive?
Focusing on major tasks:
There are thousands of tasks we can have to do. However, we need to

focus on completing the most important job of the day. We need to begin
educating and training our brains to think and act in this manner. That
way, instead of switching from one thing to another all day, we can keep
our focus on one thing.
Task Scheduling:
Getting a good routine will help us stay on track. We are more adherent
to the schedule if our to-do lists are in our calendar. For a few weeks, we
will start by capturing everything we do. Checking our activities in
balance will help us figure out where we are wasting time and how we
can improve it.
Removing Distractions:
Distractions stop us from being productive. We have the power of

handling our tasks if we think of it as our responsibility. It can be harmful
to us if we think of putting our hands in all of the tasks in one day. Giving
our undivided attention to something means sacrificing the consistency
of our thoughts and jobs. The easiest way to become more productive is
to strive to be more conscious and in the zone of everything we need to
finish.
Today is the day for us to take care of our lives. Rather than allowing life
to dominate us, we should take control of it. Rather than having someone
to control our time and goals, we get to pick what we do. Our productive
attitude can make us stand out in both our personal and professional life.
We gain more personal time, which we can use to unwind and de-stress
or drive ourselves to take on new opportunities and achieve outstanding
102
results. Hence, we should go for productive activities to make our life

smoother than ever.
103
38
PLANNING: THE SOURCE OF POWER
W
e often make plans for something or the other. It means we
are well aware of the benefits, plans bring to us, if we execute
them properly. Some people spend more time planning their
vacations than time spends on planning their life. How absurd is it? We
live our lives without any planning. Studies have shown that adults who
plan their lives have more success rate than those who take life as it goes.
Planning gives us more insight. We can look deep into future

opportunities, possibilities, and dangers as well. The road to success is
not easy at all. We have to face difficulties at every step. A good plan
can help us to overcome such complications. Opportunities can be
created through proper planning. If we are working in a corporation, we
can plan how to get our work done better than others and climb the stairs
to success. Dangers can be avoided by taking precautionary measures
within time. Planning develops our insight, and insight prepares us for
everything.
A well-planned life brings us power and comfort. More often, we

postpone things and put them on tomorrow. Do not do that. In life, each
day should be better and more organized than the previous one. Plan it
today. Plan for your future, whether it is family, job, or business. The
only way to get better results in every domain of life is through better
planning. That is why planning is compulsory in one's life.
104
Planning social life and our relationship brings us closer to our

destination. We are the average of our social circle. Those five people
we spend our time with influence our whole life. Reconsidering the toxic
social circle will help us to grow faster. Find five people who are living
the life we dream about. Engage with them. Learn from them. We should
also engage ourselves in online social activities. Grow together, grow
faster. Does our current relationship support us to become what we
wanted our whole life? Does our relationship bring us closer to our
goals? These are some questions, if we think wisely over them, enables
us to stop wondering in bareness. It will open new pathways of mental
and spiritual growth.
Planning: saves our time
Most people spend hours planning. But they do not get the result from it
because they are planning to organize the un-organizable. Time is a
precious commodity, why waste it?
We plan about the things which are not important. Indulging ourselves
in the right direction will help us to plan better. And such planning will
save our time. For example, make a list before going to the grocery store
or shopping. If we need a book, we can purchase it online with a single
click. Planning will assist us to make quicker decisions and it will save
our time. Time is money and money indeed is power.
Planning: reduces the effort, increases efficiency
Everyone wants to increase efficiency and reduce the efforts. It is the

basic work principle of the modern-day corporate sector. But it is only
possible with the right planning. We can plan our meetings and tours.
Digitalization also provides increased efficiency. The increased
efficiency contributes to the production of the individual as well as on
collective levels.
105
Career planning
Who does not want to excel in the career? Who does not want to get the
dream position in office? Is there anyone who does not want to start a
new business? Career planning makes it possible to change the question
mark into an exclamation. With the right approach towards our career
planning, we can all turn impossible into possibilities. Planning can
make us move faster than others in the right direction to pursue our
dreams. The more secure place in the hierarchy gives us power.
Financial planning
People in every part of the world often suffer from poor financial
conditions. Planning can shed the burden off our shoulders. In Japan,
after the destruction of the second world war and atomic explosions on
two of their cities, the financial condition of the Japanese people and the
country became very poor. But they defeated it and became one of the
world's richest countries. Financial planning can help us to save money
for the future. It can also help build the economy of our country.
106
39
LIVE LIKE A FOX
F
ox is an animal just like thousands of others. But what makes
them so special? It is the ability to live a smart and measured life.
They make quick and smart decisions depending upon the
prevailing situations. They use their tail for balance. That is why the fox
is considered a smart animal.
But what it has to do with the human being. The basic argument is that
if a fox can live a smart life, why cannot we? They are just animals with
limited abilities, while on the other hand, we humans are the most
evolved creatures on the entire planet. There are some of the details we
should know about before going into details of this topic.
We can excel in life by working smart. Everyone has heard these

sentences so much that it has become a cliché. But what exactly working
smarts mean? Working smart means using all the available means to
coordinate, communicate, and find all possible activities that matter the
most and generating the best possible result from the whole scenario. The
meaning and definition of the word “working smart” can be different
from person to person based on their exceptional skills and abilities. In
other words, working-smart means knowing our strengths and improving
our abilities.
107
Be Fox: save time and money
The whole material world is revolving around these two things, i.e. time
and money. The first step towards working smart is to know how to save
both for ourselves or our corporation. We have to work on our abilities
to do. Making and saving money is not an easy task in this modern world.
Everywhere we will see an atmosphere of competition. It is very
challenging to survive in this race. Working smart is the only suitable
mood we can apply to have and save both time and money.
Be Fox: Determine the Direction
Knowing the direction is fundamental. Without direction, the possibility

of losing the path increases a thousand times. A fox always knows where
to go and find the prey. They use the Earth's magnetic field to find the
direction. Every time the fox finds the north pole, the chances to get the
food increases over 70 percent. How impressive is that? We have to
apply the same strategy in our lives. If we truly know the direction we
want to follow then the rate of success will increase to an incredibly high
level.
Be Fox: Always prepared
We should prepare ourselves for the worst. Foxes can be found in almost
every environment. They can survive in snow. They are present in the
deserts. In short, they can be found everywhere on land, from the Arctic
to North Africa. We should be like them. Ready to face challenges and
setbacks, if any crosses our path. We should make peace with the
circumstances just like the clever fox. A person who is well aware of the
surroundings can see things coming. Therefore, we can make necessary
arrangements to tackle the expected and unexpected events.
108
40
PRACTICE SAYING “I DON’T KNOW”
T
he most embarrassing or difficult sentence people think they can
ever utter is, "I don't know." At present age, one needs a lot of
courage and power to say this sentence, probably because of the
fear of being cross-examined. Our common perception is if we say "I
don't know," the next person will start judging us, and we will be
considered incompetent. The reason is we are tutored by our mindsets
that giving a quick response to any query, be it our cup of tea or not, is a
sign of leadership and excellence.
However, it never works like that. Practice saying this phrase can save
us from many crises. The following points support the importance of
saying, "I don't know."
No one knows everything.
Humans' knowledge is limited; even the most genius person on this earth
does not know about everything. It is only God who is all-powerful and
all-knower. Therefore, we should have no shame about the things we
don't know; instead, it is better to confess than to make excuses. We are
not the only ones whose knowledge is limited, but none of us on this
planet is perfect; thus, we should feel no hesitation in saying "I don't
know" if you don't know the things being asked for.
109
Realize that we are not in the spotlight.
That implies one doesn't have to be on top of every list. If we don't know
about a certain thing or if we are unsure about it, we can simply say no.
There’s no harm in it. And the image that we have set of being a “leader”
in our minds won’t get affected either.
We should accept our versions of who we are!
To start explaining this notion, it is the best example that people in the
battle need to accept their versions.
The game is if we accept our versions, we’ll gain confidence, and then
saying “I don't know” will not be any of a huge problem anymore.
Acceptance starts with awareness that everyone is not the same and
neither are all social circumstances favourable for everyone. One might
know everything but they are introverted so they don't speak in
gatherings and they are not embarrassed for that. So, the situations and
characteristics vary among all. Not everybody is all-knower except God.
So, we should tell ourselves that we are enough.
Saying “I don't know” gives chance to other people who know it.
If we don't know the answer, we should not act over-efficient and

instead, we should give others a chance to speak. If somebody else knows
the thing and he may benefit the community with his meaningful words.
Why are we wasting our and theirs time?
It is healthy to give chances to others. It is not a rule that only one person
can be the efficient one who knows it all. No, this is not how it works.
Last, but not least, practicing “I don't know” is a healthy thing if one
doesn't know the thing. Hence, we should start practicing this thing the
very next minute and not feel ashamed because that doesn’t influence
our dignity at all.
110
41
EGO AND ITS TRAPS
I
f you think it is more “spiritual” to read books or novels but then
find yourself judging those who watch movies or play games, you
are in an ego trap”
Let’s discuss what we tend to ignore most of the time. Simply consider
yourself once you were purely a child, you were scarcely a “soul”, a
“feeling”, an aware body with no expectations, with no strength, goal or
dreams, rather an individual solely crafted out by mother nature.
The individuals around you (your family) begin feeding their cultural,
religious, moral, beliefs, opaque judgments, and social worth to your
mind.
How All of this Started?
The child who was simply a soul has been remodeled into an individual
with knowing the distinction between “right or wrong”,” smart or bad”,
“poor or rich”, “ugly or beautiful”, “respect or disrespect”. All things
considered, the child (you) has become a slave of criteria.
With time, once you grow by following the preceding criteria from the
conscious mind, it'll then remodel into the subconscious as a result of
something that we tend to keep following from years, or something that's
111
being injected into our conscious mind from a very long time;
transforming itself into another type, the subconscious.
Journey From the Conscious Mind to the Subconscious Mind
The journey from the conscious mind to the subconscious mind is so

dangerous that you can control the conscious mind but you can’t control
your subconscious mind, it’s a way to lose control over yourself. As a
result, your mind comes across words like why? Or How?
Let’s dig this topic in depth. The growth of a Subconscious mind relies
on what you’ve been feeding your mind consciously for a long time and
it then turns into a rock-solid emotion of “how you think”. When a
logical mind transforms into a form of emotion, it becomes strikingly
risky because you can’t control your emotional method without a solid
dedication of time or meditation. Now that feeling is being referred to as
ego, in more defined words I'd call it a “limit” of your personality. It’s
such a robust sentiment that forces individuals to break their strongest,
very long-time relationships, it's such a robust sentiment that can even
bypass the feeling of “love”.
The Ego Traps
You were trapped with this emotion from your childhood when you were
not given the chance to perceive the world through your eyes and instead
were simply forced to comprehend the world through the eyes of the
world. That’s precisely why it’s being entitled a “trap”.
Get Comfortable with Getting Uncomfortable
The moment you begin realizing this trap and you begin wondering
yourself with a neutral state of mind, this is often the instant that will
bring all the quality, all the success, all the love into your life. Simply
put, the recognization of dis-ease is the first step towards healing itself.
Who is on the driving Seat? You or your ego?

112
The minute you tell yourself that you just don't seem to be your “ego”,
you're “eternal”, you're over simply a “criteria” or a “set of rules”, you're
not the definition of how the world desires to scrutinize you, you're
simply you, you're a neutral state of mind who’s comfortable with being
uncomfortable, that’s the instant you got yourself back! That’s the
moment you're within the driving seat of your life and not your ego.
113
42
HOW TO INCREASE CONSCIOUSNESS?
W
ith technological advances, the world has moved towards
artificial, ordinary, and temporary material things that are
easy to access, use, and then dispose of. Now I am not in any
sense denying the vitality of materials in our lives but one must be
conscious that his true roots are beyond content and mere structures.
Human consciousness has also been lost with this material advancement.
This unconscious state of the human mind has proved a black hole, where
you find nothing but darkness. People have stopped focusing around;
scarcely appreciating the splendid uniqueness of existence, and are way
too busy with meeting their lives’ end.
Life is so mysterious and full of surprises but we're paying little to no

attention. For bringing beauty and excitement to life we need to develop
a sense of consciousness and awareness towards life.
Elements Increasing Consciousness
Mindfulness is the key to consciousness when a person starts to focus

and think about things and occasions occurring around them, make them
able to critically analyze everything and draw conclusions. This ability
helps them to make informed decisions regarding their life. Secondly,
solitude is another channel to connect you with your life’s aspiration and
helps you to know your soul more than your voluntary being. Only then
you do feel yourself floating in the air and making contact with puzzles
114
of the universe. Then comes the identification of your intentions, which

means when you start focusing you will find the aims and objectives of
your life eventually having a definite reason for your living. It
collectively takes you to the heights of consciousness.
What Does Consciousness Do?
Consciousness makes you capable of seeing yourself beyond opaque

beliefs, definitions, judgements, and images. You put on several masks
on your true self, to get fit into the standards of society for being
acceptable. Yet, nobody appreciates your efforts, so it is better to start
wearing yourself with full grace. But for this, you need to know what
you are, and what you want from life? Answers to these questions can be
found by diving into the deep sea of consciousness, where everything
appears to be more crystal clear. Where every noise disappears and you
hear your heart beating with its unusual velocity. You can stay in that sea
how long you want, even without any artificial oxygen mask.
Consciousness attracts within you:
Consciousness is something that defines the attraction within your life.

You eventually start loving yourself and the reason for your being. You
stop complaining and start living your life to its fullest extent, because
every moment, you are living is because of YOU. You realize how to
treat yourself and others in a better and conscious way, which is
necessary to eliminate social evils, such as gender inequality,
discrimination, unequal distribution of resources among class, etc. This
is why we need to aware people of the significance of consciousness by
raising their ability to focus on nature, by decreasing their fear of
solitude, and by enlightening them on the importance of identification of
intentions and aims.
115
43
KNOW WHEN AND WHERE TO STOP:
DILEMMA WITH GROWTH?
I
f we consciously analyze reality, it is very complicated to know
where and when to stop. Like many life activities, there is no definite
line for growth. That is why we cannot say, we are done here, after
getting a certain passion. When we say that, we do not "know when to
stop" it means we do not know our behavior very well. We will upset the
people around us by our behavior and attitude, and people will avoid us
because of the negative vibes. It will bring many intricate problems for
us in the future.
Today's civilized men are trained to stop on certain signs. We are tuned
in the manner to stop when we are about to breach a certain law. Some
people believe in omens and they make their moves according to them.
But the real art lies in knowing when and where to stop without having
any of the above-mentioned clues.
Key for success
Success is what we all want. We are running after it without knowing the
line which can tear our dreams apart if we overstep them. We have to
play safe. It is the only way to get the desired results. Otherwise, we will
only get disappointments in the end.
116
To clarify it much further. Let us take an example. If we are looking for

a car in the market, we finalize our research and narrow it down to two
cars of relatively similar specifications. They have similar engine types
and power. But both cars come under different company names. When
we visited the authorized dealerships of both brands we met two different
salesmen. One goes beyond the limits and tells us that sitting in the car
and the seat will give you the comfort of BMW. The other knows where
to stop and tells us the truth about the brand and it also makes the man
honest.
Dilemma with Growth

Knowing or not knowing when and where to stop is the dilemma with
growth. People spend their whole lives suffering from such a situation.
They do not know what to choose if they are given two seemingly
identical yet different choices.
Continuous growth in any field is unsustainable. On the other hand, the

declining growth is unstable. These are two major problems every one
of us faces in life and our governments face it when they try to run the
economic system of our countries.
Financial growth affects personal relationships
Financial growth brings drastic changes in our personality and social

circle. On the other hand, it affects our relationships and poisons it in any
way. It is a common perception. It is because material prosperity is
mandatory to get a good status in society and once we obtain that status
we cannot make enough time to spend with our loved ones. The
expectations then bring disasters to the whole family. Love and material
prosperity both are necessary, but keeping a balance between them is not
that easy. These are interwoven socio-economic relations regarding
growth dilemmas.
117
44
PATIENCE IS VITAL: DON'T BE IN A RUSH
TO CHANGE?
P
atience is an ability that is not present in all of us. Especially in
today’s world, where everything is moving fast, we are slowly
losing our capability to be patient. We have goods delivered to
our doorstep, fast internet, and quick communication through phones.
We have become accustomed to instant gratification. However, that is
doing more harm than good.
Change is a part of life. Whether it’s people, feelings, mindsets, or

materialistic things, everything changes. That’s just how life is.
However, impatience during a change, such as personal growth, can
prevent us from achieving it. All the great things in life require us to
patiently wait before we achieve them.
Changes take time
A change could relate to anything. It could be a personal change, a

change in work, or a house change. The point to realize is that nothing
happens overnight. For example, if we join a gym with the hopes of
building muscle, we won’t see a noticeable change in just a week.
However, after a year of exercise, we’ll see a drastic difference. We are
bound to achieve great things when we adopt patience.
118
When we want to see a significant change in our lives, we should be

prepared to wait. We will experience bad days too, but that’s a part of
the process. However, being patient will help us stick to our path until
our efforts are duly rewarded.
The power of patience
When we feel impatient about something, it affects our minds. We feel

irritated, frustrated, and more likely to make bad decisions that can insist
us give up on our efforts. It adds to our stress in the long run, making it
harder to make meaningful changes to our life.
When we want something, we should understand that it takes time. It

takes years for a seed to grow into a tree to provide shade. We can’t
expect a fully grown tree in weeks. Looking at life from a patient
person’s perspective makes us understand that not everything in life can
be granted instantly, which makes us okay with making efforts for that
change for a long time. Trying to see results quickly at all costs won’t
take us anywhere. Being patient allows us to make sensible and rational
decisions that allow us to see the change we are after.
We should never give up on our goals just because they are taking a long
time. Even tiny little steps every day can turn into a major change
someday. Time doesn’t wait for anyone instead, it keeps going. So, the
years will keep going to pass no matter what we do. We can be patient,
keep our goals in sight, and keep pushing in the face of adversity.
Success doesn’t come in a couple of days, it takes months or years, and
that’s completely okay. Those who are impatient in all aspects of life fail
to fulfill the requirements to see the change they want in themselves.
Persistence always pays off.
119
45
YOU KNOW YOUR HEART BETTER
THAN ANYONE. SO TRUST IT !
W
e waste our lifetime attempting to adhere to the desires of
others. This is a violation of our inner self. The exterior
world should not decide how we should live or behave.
Because listening to our heart can help us in having the best version of
our life. There is an element of love, courage, and joy present deep inside
us. It is more about trusting our hearts when it comes to trusting our inner
selves. Life should be a joyful adventure. Whereas our hearts can
increase the true fun of life. Our hearts will find their way back in the
correct direction if we believe and welcome the journey.
“Don’t let the noise of other’s opinions drown out your inner voice.”
– Steve Jobs.
Not listening to oneself may result in detrimental effects, which may

involve the robust fear of abandonment. In this case, we derive our
personality by satisfying others rather than listening to our hearts. It may
also lead to sadness, so feeling lost all alone is exhausting. We need to
always listen to our hearts no matter how compelling other’s opinions
sound. Because when our inner self is satisfied with our decision, there
are no chances of regret and risk left over there.
Magic of listening to your heart:

120
No doubt, our minds are skillful in creating some of the most exquisite
works of art and ingenious solutions. On the other hand, it is wrapped up
inside the confines of this physical existence, in all of its drama and
anxiety. It is possible to lose contact with our essence. The root of joy
that comes from inside; the understanding of who we are can never be
found anywhere other than our hearts. And this is why listening to our
hearts is so appealing, that we get habitual of making fair and logical
choices.
Making a satisfied and rational decision can prove to be the best option
for us. Simplistic and eternal is what emanates from our hearts.
Following through is shown by a light sensation in our heart, which
indicates that our heart is having an ease. A dense fear in our hearts is a
sign that the decision or thinking is not in line with our values.
Only the best for us is present in our hearts. It is up to us to trust our

lovely hearts, for doing so entails trusting ourselves. We validate our
inner voice when we trust our hearts, acknowledging that we know what
is best for us. Keeping our hearts safe will teach us that we are the only
ones who have the key to our peace and joy; no one can consider giving
it to us or taking it away. It has always been there for us, and it is present
in our hearts. It is the time for us to allow the magic of our hearts to lead
us to passion, joy, and happiness. Because our heart knows what is best
for us.
121
46
LINE BETWEEN LEADERSHIP &
AUTHORIZATION
T
here is a vast difference between a leader and someone having
authority. They might seem similar at first, but that is not the
case. A leader and an authoritative person both have followers,
but the support and connection they get from them are different. For
instance, someone with only the title of a manager might not be a good
leader. Generally, leadership works better than authority, but authority is
necessary for any organization too.
Definitions:
Leadership, as the term suggests, follows the principle of leading other

people. It acts as a guide for the followers. A leader can become powerful
due to their influence on others but doesn’t require a position of power.
Some people are born to be great leaders, while others can develop this
quality with time. It requires time and effort to be a good leader.
Authority, on the other hand, is a different term. It involves having power

and command over other people, either due to social status, position, or
rank. It can be enforced, it is not necessary for people to willingly follow
the person in power. Authority is unidirectional from a person to their
subordinates. A person with a high rank can command their team by
122
using the set of laws and regulations defined to their position. This
doesn’t mean that they are leading them.
Differences:
Being a successful leader doesn’t require a powerful position. People

follow a good leader and respect their values by choice, and not just
because they are forced to obey. This is why leadership seems to be
preferred more than authoritarianism. Leadership carries everyone
together. It grants a connection between the leader and their team
through an agreement of thoughts, opinions, and values. To move
forward, this connection is invaluable. A good leader listens to his
followers and understands their words, instead of just formulating a reply
and dismissing them. This shows that they care about their team instead
of themselves, which is a valuable trait.
A person with authority is just that, a boss. It revolves around the concept
of power and is mainly about enforcing decisions and directions just
because of position. It is based on giving orders instead of the
participation of the person with authority. Authority limits the freedom
of choice. In contrast to leadership, authority doesn’t inspire the people
receiving orders. It does not carry a team together as a single unit. Since
the position of an authoritative person determines their power and status,
it can be transferred to anyone who holds it.
Both leadership and authority exist in organizations, whether it’s a

company, business, or even a classroom. A leader inspires growth in
their team and works with them to take them to success while
authoritarianism involves sitting back and observing. There is a
difference between gaining the respect and support of followers by a
leader and demanding it in the case of a person with authority.
123
47
NEGATIVE SIDES OF LEADERSHIP
L
eadership is the most useful until we positively utilize our power.
A slight shift in our leadership attitude can have negative effects.
A terrible leadership attribute can create an unfavorable
environment in the organization. Let us look at the negative sides of
leadership.
Loss of inspiration:
A leader's reputation has become a factor of serious consideration. The

standards of accepting responsibility and inspiring others for high
confidence get seriously affected due to the negative side of leadership.
The more positive traits are visible in leaders, the more prestige and
recognition they gain. And the more executives who understand how to
instill trust in others, the better the organization's image can be. Bad
leaders have a hard time empowering others.
Inadequate vision:
In companies, employees are at a disadvantage if they don't have a clear

path. They have no idea what are the company's objectives, whether they
are dealing with complex procedures. They would work for a shared
purpose only physically, not in any intellectual guidance. Poor leadership
stifles the growth of synergy, which may contribute to disjointed
124
divisions and job functions. It suggests that each employee overlooks the
significance of his or her role in achieving organizational goals.
A successful leader can engage with subordinates daily to share a variety

of knowledge and foster collaboration. Employees who are encouraged
to exchange thoughts and participate in open conversations support the
organization and demonstrate that everyone is working for the same
goals.
Pessimistic culture:
Poor leadership at the peak will stifle any advancement in the skills of
managers around the board. Middle managers begin to imitate their
Senior Leaders' approaches to people management and corporate
decisions. It continues to trickle down the hierarchy, gradually becoming
a company culture and causing poor morale.
Lack of collaborations:
Organizations that implement fruitful teamwork practices, both inside

and outside the organization, are most likely to succeed. Leaders require
good leadership expertise to improve connections and establish useful
ties within their platform to construct a collaborative work climate. As a
result, knowledge exchange and problem-solving improve. Bad
leadership sends out negative energy that also extends beyond the
internal community. A bad leader's conduct may hurt the workplace and
the reputation of external relationships.
Low-Performance Management:
Employees may feel wrongheaded or insecure about the business and

their employment as a result of failed leadership. Failure to handle
inefficient workers or mediocre performers will result in low
performance, as successful employees are often forced to make up the
difference. Employee-manager conflict can hurt productivity and
125
efficiency. Employees who believe they are being let down or humiliated
by their managers can become dissatisfied and disheartened.
It is indeed crucial to understand the characteristics of poor leadership;

so that they can be identified early and addressed until the company fails.
When we can recognize a terrible leader, we can prevent the mistakes
that would make us terrible ones in our work and personal life. If
possible, it is always a plus point to recognize negative leadership
behavior in your seniors and correct them on the spot.
126
48
EGO IS THE RIVAL OF SUCCESS
W
e have to understand the difference between ego and
confidence. Some people confuse ego with confidence. They
gradually destroy their lives believing that what they have
been doing and what they are doing with the other people around them
comes under the scope of confidence. But when they reach a certain point
they do lose everyone and everything. Too much ego will kill not only
our confidence but our career and relations as well.
The ego and success cannot go side by side. We have to let our ego go
to be successful. In the modern world, the business climate has changed.
Now a single person cannot monopolize the market. Cooperation and
mutual benefits have taken the place of ego. In today's business
environment, diversity is the key. The most thriving businesses are
served by diversity. With our ego, working in such a diversified
environment is not possible. So ego is the direct rival to our success.
Ego: enemy of compassion
How can an egoistic person be compassionate? These are like the

antonyms to each other. Ego kills compassion, and without compassion,
success is a dream. It makes us see the worst in the people. Most of the
time, we become defensive. How can a defensive attitude bring success?
Success is the name of playing safe and aggressive. Without these
qualities, success is impossible.
127
Ego: stops love
Love is the essence of anything and everything. Without the magic of

love, how can we think of success? When we do not allow ourselves to
be vulnerable bad things can happen. When we are always waiting for
other people to come to us, we may gradually lose loving people. Studies
have shown that in the corporate industry, the firms where the
relationship is based on love develop faster than others.
Ego: happiness and success
Ego will take us through unnecessary emotional changes. We will not be

satisfied after having the things we desired a year ago. It will make us
constantly compare ourselves with others. How can such a person be
happy? It will invite depression and fear of losing. We will criticize
ourselves because we make mistakes. It will close the door to success
forever. It will take us into the shallow valley of despair and grief from
where no one can climb back to the world of hope and happiness.
Ego: family life
Being successful in business or having a promising career are not the

only parameters to measure success. Having a successful marital life is
the key to open many doors. After all, we are doing everything for our
family and peace of mind. Bad vibes attract bad vibes. If we are egoistic,
it is more likely that we will fall in love with a woman with the same
temperament. It can be disastrous because both have a high ego. The
chase would end up nowhere, and the relationship would cease to exist
before it starts. If we want the relationship to thrive, we will have to come
down from the big horse and embrace the one we love.
Even if we get married to such a woman, who has a big self-ego, our life
is not going to be easy. Both will try to beat the other, and ultimately it
will bring problems for the family.
128
49
THE WALLS WE BUILD AROUND
OURSELVES
O
ur insecurities make us build walls around ourselves. We think
that we are too vulnerable that sparks feelings of self-doubt.
Doubts then manipulate the facts and make us believe the wrong
statistics. These mixed emotions and miss calculations then propel us to
form walls to confine the insecure being within ourselves.
When we build walls around ourselves, different things can happen.
First, we feel comfortable because of the new walls we have recently

built around us. Now, we do not have to deal with the people outside. It
is very comforting. We do not have to worry about the outer world. Now,
our comfort zone lies within those walls.
Second, we will feel irritated by the presence of people around us. We

will find it much more difficult to make connections with people. How
is it possible to befriend people with walls around us?
The reason we build the walls
These walls could not build on their own. There are many factors
involved that serve as the foundation. These foundations then provide
the necessary footing for structuring the walls.
129
Lack of trust: sometimes, we all feel a lack of trust, whether they are
people we do not trust or certain situations. In such an environment to
ensure the safety of our being we prefer to rise those strong walls. lack
of trust compels us into despair. The only way to get relieved is to form
the protective layer around ourselves.
Status: it is so confusing to write about this fact. Rich or poor, it does

not matter, they all try to hide from something, or we should say they try
to hide from each other! Whatever the case is, it results in isolation.
Mostly, the rich make more walls to hide their true being from society.
they do not want to look fragile and weak. They have other interests as
well. Business is not easy after all. We have to pay the cost.
Breaking the walls is important
Why break the walls necessary when one feels comfortable inside them?
The answer is simple, “To Grow”. Walls in reality are not protective forts
but a cage. They confine a person within a limited boundary and make
them feel safe by alluding to their senses. It is time to break those walls.
because the reality is.
● Someone wants the same person we are

● Someone out there needs our skills
● We have everything necessary to be happy
● We will have our opportunities
● We can make friends
We are not alone in this. There are thousands of people around the world
struggling with the same insecurities we have.
Confidence needs space that walls cannot provide. As a result, we

observe a lack of confidence and low self-esteem in such a person who
130
lives inside a self-made cage. To rediscover confidence, one has to stand

up and break the walls.
Of course, walls deter the growth. Growth is only possible when we step
out of our comfort zone and face the world.
The positive side of the walls
To balance the argument, it is necessary to mention the positive aspect

of the walls. We humans are fragile. We are defenseless in every possible
definition of the word. It gives us time to think in solitude. We carve out
the meaning of life by hammering these walls. they provide us a break-
through.
131
50
LET GO OF EMOTIONAL BAGGAGE
W
hen we witness a damaging situation and feel we could
reverse it. Our non-accepting behavior of reality ends up
filling the emotional baggage. When we have feelings of
guilt over something, we have emotional baggage attached to it. The
problem is that guilt isn't the only way our moral baggage manifests itself
in our lives.
Emotional baggage will spiral out of control inside our insecurities,

worries, ways of thinking, or even manifest as sporadic anxiety attacks.
It is challenging to conquer relational baggage because it's too enticing
and can hide deep inside our minds. When we think we're handling
emotional baggage, we're usually just fixing a symptom of the issue, not
the primary cause.
Identify what went wrong:
We sometimes put our emotions to the side, only to be confronted with

them later as they resurface in the form of tears, sadness, or outbursts
towards others. When troubling feelings arise, we should go outside in a
park and take a quick walk. Observing what feelings arise and how we
feel emotionally will assist us in determining the problem. It's time for
the next step when we have a clearer idea about what is going wrong. In
short, a time to organize and embrace our thoughts and emotions after
we've recognized them.
132
Make a mental map of your ideas:
Making a clear insight into life and how we felt about unforeseen
situations is a considerable part of letting go of our emotional baggage.
It is essential to pay attention to the small details in this case. It would be
unnecessary to skip over any facts that make us uneasy or that we believe
are insignificant. Details matter a lot in this practice, particularly the ones
that cause nervousness or elicit painful thoughts. If we don't have a
single case in mind, we should look for a circumstance that makes us feel
nervous, depressed, or upset all of the time.
Master mindfulness:
Changing patterns takes time, specifically when they depend on deep

hurts or fears. Regularly checking in with oneself by journaling or
reflection can be beneficial. If we find ourselves carrying old luggage,
we must first remember it before releasing it and concentrating on our
affirmations. We will be able to let go if we replace pessimistic feelings
with positive deeds.
Let go and move on:
Finally, we should realize the importance of the power of letting go.

Holding on to stuff may make us feel safe because it's a pattern we have
developed. We believe that by hanging on, those who have induced the
suffering will be accountable, when in fact, we are the ones who are
being held captive. We don't forget either because we let go. It no longer
has authority over us or an effect over our actions. Our thought processes
play an essential role in this, but learning to identify and challenge ones
that have us stuck in the past will help us move on.
Regardless of our luggage, each of us has unlimited potential. All suffer

from some discomfort. It's a vital part of who we are. The way we deal
with it, on the other hand, is what distinguishes us. We can only accept
133
the reality to continue further when we leave the weight of emotional

baggage behind.
134
51
CREATIVITY CAN BE LEARNED
C
reativity is quite an admirable trait that is sought after. In simple
words, it can be defined as the ability to generate unique and
fresh ideas. It helps in standing out from the world, which is
constantly moving forward. Innovative ideas are needed to stay on top
of the game. However, most people resort to thinking of the obvious
solutions when it comes to a problem. This is what makes creativity a
challenge for some because they need to make efforts to think out of the
box. It is widely thought that being creative is an innate gift, however,
that’s not the case. It can be taught and learned by anyone, as long as
they practically apply their efforts and not just think about being creative.
Are creative people different from others?
A creative person isn’t a superhuman. They don’t live in the middle of

the jungle to think of new ideas. They are normal human beings just like
the rest of the population. They have their homes, jobs, families, friends,
schedules, and much more in their lives. They also have their days where
they feel drained and uncreative. They might not have lots of free time
to cultivate their creativity. It takes a few minutes of the day to develop
and improve one’s creativity. Everyone’s mind is capable of procuring
new ideas and thoughts, and this can be used to their own advantage if
they explore more.
135
How can creativity be developed?
Seeing things from a different perspective: Whenever we are faced with

a problem or task, we tend to think of the obvious solution. However,
aside from that, one can try to think about alternate solutions and
practically apply them to see what works. Keeping an open mind and
considering multiple possibilities to a problem develops creativity
greatly. Other times, looking from a different perspective helps in
brainstorming new ideas.
Pushing out of the comfort zone:
It is an exercise in itself to break out of our comfort zone, but it’s well
worth it. Doing things the easy way as we’ve always done it makes our
path unidirectional. Exploring other routes makes us branch out to things
we might have been missing out on.
Not being afraid of failure:
A person’s push towards creativity is not a one-time thing, it is a constant

process that requires effort and patience. One of the things to remove
from this process is the fear of failure. This way, a person starts to take
risks, that might land them on something entirely new. Even if they are
not successful, they gain some experience and develop new creative
talents.
Exploring the surroundings:
Sometimes, it might be helpful to take a look at our environment. Going

out to different places, picking up a book, learning about an interesting
topic can help free up the mind and maybe inspire us to think differently.
Developing a creative mind
It can help a person excel in school or work. The concept of laying down
a set of standard rules for everyone to follow like a line can affect one’s
136
creativity. Everyone’s mind is already wired to think of new ideas, so it’s

best to expand that further.
137
52
SENTIMENTS FOR THE SOUL
“Do things from your soul and you’ll feel the river moving in you, a
great pleasure”
S
oul is what makes a human being feel alive, it is the nature inside
the human body. Nature has involved the soul with “a sense of
feeling”, the sensation of being happy or sad. Most of the people
exist while not knowing the necessity of their soul, everything is doing
fine in their life however they're still not happy.
Why? Because they're not feeding their soul, they're feeding their body
with good food and every other necessity however while paying little to
no attention to the inner realms. As an outcome, they live their life with
a sense of unhappiness or discontentment.
A soul is something that can’t be impure. the body, human mind, the
human heart could be impure however the soul is something utterly pure
and it's utterly smitten by what action a person takes.
Discover what makes your soul happy
Nature has injected a sentiment in our soul that actually drives human
beings, that brings the meaning and satisfaction to our lives that's
“LOVE”. Love is superior over all the other sentiments, it's the feeling
that is not solely felt for the humans but additionally for animals as well.
138
Simply put, when we tend to give love to the people, ultimately we feel
alive and nourished, as we tend to feel a form of satisfaction in our lives.
All things considered, Love could be a sentiment that offer growth to the
intellect of the person, As Napoleon Hill said in one of his books that
“most of the successful people within the world were nice lovers”
Soul can’t breathe without love
Love features an awe-inspiringly deep reference to success, after you

love people, you feel complete and after you feel complete it drives an
energy into your soul, that energy drives you toward success, because a
soul is sort of a magnet, it attracts positivism and love. Love makes your
soul gentle and kind, it's such a powerful sentiment that introduces you
to all of the other relative feelings and gestures. A soul of affection would
undoubtedly be compassionate.
To love yourself and others could be a true reflection of our true nature
that is universal and accepted.
Life is as easy or complicated as we have a tendency to create it
To us, life is all about the “uncertainty” because we do not have time to
connect with our sacred selves and so we end up repeating the opaque
cycle of stress, exhaustion and discontentedness. Therefore the best way
to live would be “to live gently”, which means being kind to yourself
that implies treating yourself with kindness and forgiving yourself for
mistakes and to create choices for yourself that might contribute to your
future happiness and contentment. Removing yourself from toxic things
that might cause your life-pattern to face suffering, anger or unhappiness
is a great approach towards peace.
Give people the gift of your presence
By being light towards others, you become a person; people would like
to communicate with you, because you offer people the gift of presence,
139
and listen to people actively, when people mess-up, you don’t judge them
or criticize them however you're ready to witness them with awareness
and compassion.
Create the highest level of Good for the world
In our current times, the time of social media, everyone wishes to be the
loudest voice within the area, people are trying to pretend their life,
they're faking the essence of love and appreciation. However, to live
gently, I feel boils all the way down to one thing: that's conscious
awareness. If we have a tendency to break the stereotypes and take
intentional actions towards love, joy, compassion, and emotional
balance, only then we can master the art of living gently and letting go
of things not meant for us.
140
53
BE THE MASTER OF YOUR MIND
T
he moment one reads the title, he reflects that he was unaware of
this secret reality. The reflection is so intense that it creates a
doubt whether we had spent all our lives being controlled by an
entity none other than our own conditioned mind. Most people get to
know that the title reflects reality to a large extent.
Mind dictating it’s owner:
Scarcely anyone can deny the fact that society does not influence him or
her directly. Society rather impinges the personalities and taking the
societal effects unconsciously becomes our habit. The dogmas set by our
community are ingrained in us. We simply cannot shatter them single-
handedly. While spending our lives, unconsciously we got over-
controlled by our brains that made us function in the way of societal
systems. We lose control and thus revolve around the boundaries set
forth by the society.
Evidence:
A plethora of examples is present in front of us in our daily lives. If an

elephant’s one leg is bound with a light chain, then even after getting
older and stronger he would not break that light chain. However, the light
chain can easily be broken with his little force. Actually what happens
is, his mind controls him and thus creates restrictions on his mind.
141
Similarly, instead of critically thinking about societal norms, we keep on

following them and this is due to the subconscious that is controlling or
rather dictating us.
Controlling the mind:
Mind is a great tool and it should be given the freedom necessary for
creativity and innovation but it must not be left free for dictating its
owner. Almost all of us are in the abyss of destructive and repetitive
thinking patterns. This makes us dysfunctional and thus we could not
reach our real powers and realms.
Mind Trapping Us in Rat Race:
Just because you can solve a jigsaw puzzle or can argue well enough
against your colleague, doesn't necessarily apply that you have enough
control over your thoughts. For instance, can you give your mind a shut
up call during a restless night? Does your mind keep on repeating illicit
incidents that you hate to be remembered in the first place? If so, then let
me break the bubble for you. Indeed you are possessed by an entity, none
other than your own mind.
To get out of this trap, one should acknowledge that he must not let his
mind interfere rather he should start observing it. This can be causally
said as a no-mind state that has been an ancient concept. This was the
mantra of spiritual leaders and monks to take the control of life and a
stepping stone towards the journey.
The Possible Solutions:
Reiki Healing is one of the ultimate solutions. You start controlling your
consciousness exactly at the moment when you become aware of this
dilemma. The level of consciousness can be enhanced by focusing and
practicing spiritual techniques to fight negative and destructive thoughts.
142
This healing helps you master your mind by transferring the life force
energy within the mind and body.
143
54
CONSCIOUS TECHNIQUES FOR
SUBCONSCIOUS ANXIETY
S
ubconscious anxiety is something out of control, which can
happen to anyone. When we get to know about our tension, it is
normally regarding something relevant, usually something huge
and imminent. It is deliberate fear. Some problems bother us that we
aren't worried about right now, but we somehow don't feel totally at ease.
Our subconscious works like a machine.
The subconscious mind preserves whatever experience we deal with in

life. It makes no distinction between useful and useless information. It
simply stores anything; It keeps repeating whatever is inside that leads
to anxiety. If our mind repeatedly feds the same information, it will keep
overwriting it until the information is carved in. As one would expect,
such knowledge is more difficult to delete.
We can make things better if we focus on our conscious behavior to

negate subconscious anxiety.
Conscious positive thoughts:
Whenever we feel anxious, we should make a conscious decision. One

of the main things to do is to keep positive thoughts in mind. We should
try to divert our attention away from the issue. We should take a relaxing
stroll in the open air. We will count the good things in our lives by
144
focusing on our steps, which will help us feel secure, welcomed,

appreciated, and honored. Considering how grateful and lucky we are to
be alive with the beautiful nature and our loved ones around us is the best
feeling ever.
Attentive behavior:
Our attention gets split among a variety of items at any given moment.
Most of us have no power over our focus. It just roams about like a
wandering creature going anywhere it pleases.
The system we will use will assist us in gaining hold of our attention. We
would be able to exercise conscious actions more if we have more
leverage. For example, we can stay in touch with our feelings for
extended periods without being distracted by thoughts. Similarly, we will
watch our reflections for a long time without being trapped in them. We
may also maintain our awareness for long durations.
Mindful decision:
Whatever issues we deal with in life can only get difficult if we detach
ourselves and believe we can do it on our own. If that describes us, the
first thing we can do is go out and gain community and support. And,
with the help of trustworthy loved ones, we should go to war against our
subconscious anxiety. When we realize that we have back support in the
hard times, in the form of our loved ones. It increases our chances of
survival significantly.
Our subconscious attitude is the actual behavior of our anxiety. It entraps

us in the face of critical situations. So, by teaching our brain to believe
that there is no danger, we will turn off the fear reflex. We'll quickly
know that it's the subconscious, not anything else, that's keeping us
nervous. And with our subconscious actions, this will gradually become
simple to do. Adopting these conscious attitudes and strategies, such as
mindful breathing, requires a lot of mindful decisions. We will make that
145
possible if we stick to these rules, and we will learn to break free from
our fear cycle.
146
55
FAILURE AND INCOMPETENCE: LEARN
THE DIFFERENCE
W
ithout understanding the basic difference between these two
terms, we would not be able to apprehend the purpose of this
piece of writing. So, let’s start with defining both terms.
Failure: Failure is when, someone fails to do something, after doing

everything one can.
Incompetence: Incompetence is the inability to do something. The state

or act of being incompetent is called incompetence.
So, we should not confuse failure with incompetence and vice versa.
Both are different from each other in their nature and context. We cannot
apply failure to a situation where some incompetent person has
committed incompetence. Although incompetence would result in
failure the ingredients are different in each of the above-mentioned
terms.
Causes of failure
A failure is indeed an event that upsets us. It makes us feel worse about
ourselves that we are not capable of doing our job well. Failure does not
come by itself. If we look deep into it, there are things and events which
lead us to failure. The following are reasons people suffer from failure.
147
Lack of a well-defined purpose in life: What is the purpose of our life?

we often come across this question. Sometimes, we ask it ourselves and
sometimes, someone else asks us. Having a purpose in life is important.
If we have a well-defined purpose in life, it means, we are in full control
of our lives. we know what to do when to do and how to do it. Lack of
purpose would bring failure. If we do not know the direction how can we
even say that we will reach our destination?
Lack of Discipline: Discipline makes our lives heaven. Without having

discipline we will have to face difficulties and problems throughout our
day and our lives. we neither would be able to deliver the project on time
and not reach the meeting. This will ultimately lead us to failure.
Poor Self-Esteem: Low self-esteem is having low confidence in one's

self. When we are not confident enough to do the job, people push us
back and grab the opportunities. We do not feel comfortable with our
attire, language, way of presentation, and project we are working on.
Will we be able to make any breakthrough? These all doubts are mirrors
and we can see the failure in them.
Causes of incompetence
Incompetence is when we are not good at doing a certain task. There is

another angle to look at it, if we are unable to perform a specific job, due
to particular reasons.
Laziness: Laziness is a common cause of incompetence. We do not

bother to double-check our work which leads to errors and mistakes. We
do not bother to check the meeting schedule and we get late.
Poor Communication: Poor communication can lead to many errors.

When we are working together in a firm, we have to make sure of
effective communication. Without it, cannot be done within time and it
will be counted as incompetence on our part.
148
Lack of Training: Lack of training is another factor in the list. If we are

not well aware of the working conditions, it is obvious we will make
mistakes. These mistakes will start accumulating. When the matter goes
to the upper authorities, they will consider it as incompetence and we can
get fired from our dream job.
149
56
HOW TO PLANT THE SEED OF
COMPASSION?
I
n a world full of miseries and suffering, one should learn to be
compassionate. But the question is that how to develop compassion.
Sometimes, are the victims of this rotten system and we start
thinking that no one deserves to be treated with compassion. But we have
to remember that, the universe has its own ways to work. We get what
we spread. Positive vibes will attract positive ones.
If we consider the positive aspect of human nature, it would be far easier

for us to plant the seed of compassion in ourselves. We know that deep
down, we all human, and humans tend to do good. If we focus on the
positive aspect of human nature that tells us that in the end good always
trumps evil then it will be easy for us to grow and spread compassion in
the world.
Start by practicing self-compassion
No one tells us to be gentle and compassionate with ourselves. So, it may

be quite an unfamiliar term for many of us. Most of us have a built-in
mechanism to punish ourselves when we make any mistake. as far as we
are allowing the inner master to punish us for our inevitable mistakes and
shortcoming, we will never be able to show compassion to others.
150
First, give some room to the being inside our body. Be gentle and
compassionate with ourselves. This will open the door to be
compassionate to the other people around us when they make some
mistakes or show us the weak side of their beings, after all, we all are
humans and no one is perfect.
Practice patience and meditation
Practicing patience is not easy. Patience is most difficult to execute when

we are in an uncertain situation. But it is also the key to success. Success
means here not only personal well-being but success in each and every
domain of life. patience will provide us with compassion as it helps to
under the situation.
Meditation and patience are linked to each other. without one, the other
cannot stand a chance. Meditation is a spiritual practice that opens the
pathways to self-realization. That would lead us to understand the
miseries and suffering of the world. then we will be able to show
compassion.
Be a listener
We need more listeners around us. The problem is, everybody wants to
be listened but no one wants to listen to others. When we listen to the
people around us, without judging them, we come to know their true
nature. We become aware of their circumstances. Listening creates an
atmosphere in which we can see the unseen. Knowing the true story will
lead us to plant the seed of compassion in our hearts and mind.
Do not judge quickly
People judge so quickly. They do not even bother to look at the other
people and they do not want to hear a single word from them and still,
they make an assumption about them and within no time reaches a
conclusion as well. This will not help. Do not judge people so quickly.
151
Give them the time and space they need. This will help to build trust and
that trust will make us compassionate to those people.
152
57
EMOTIONS THAT MATTER
E
motions are the non-verbal languages through which we express
different feelings of happiness, anger, fear, hate, guilt, liking,
disliking, love agreement, surprise, and embarrassment.
We the products of our emotions. The science of emotions provides us

with a lens to understand the effects of emotions. It also helps us to
understand the factors which provoke specific emotions. It tells us how
to manage healthy emotional interaction in challenging situations.
Emotions matters a lot. Emotions affect our learning abilities and

preferences. They also influence our decisions. How we treat other
people and our personal well-being depends upon our emotions. Our
surroundings affect our emotions. Emotions drive us and we drive our
actions.
Sadness and anger
Emotions like sadness and anger matter a lot. We feel sad because of the
inability to cope with destructive live events such as the death of a loved
one. Sadness is itself an emotional change but it is also the cause of many
emotional and psychological changes. Sadness causes depression and it
can lead its victims to suicide.
153
We feel angry when we are unable to control certain situations in our

lives. Anger makes our blinds and we do not see the reality. In this way,
it destabilizes our entire life. if we look, it is just an emotion, but it has
the ability to destroy the whole life of a human being and even the lives
of the people around us.
Low self-esteem
Self-esteem equips with the cognitive ability to cope with challenging

situations. it is also observed that high self-esteem brings a high level of
personal growth. Everything is connected with our emotions.
Emotions, mind, and body
Emotions can be negative and positive. They affect our bodies according
to their nature. Different hormonal changes occur due to the emotional
changes with deciding the future pathway of our behavior. in this way,
emotions are in the driving seat. They can make our life hell or heaven.
The choice is our that which emotions we choose to adopt.
We have seen sad and gloomy people die earlier than happy ones. That’s
why European states focus on the happiness of their citizens and they
have the highest average ages in the world.
Relationship building and decision making
Emotions decide the course of our relations. If we are always angry at

our partner, it will bring instability to our relationship.
Emotions also affect our decision that’s why they are so important.
Consider a situation when we are angry and we ask the person we love
to leave us alone forever, and our partner does exactly the same. In this
case, we will spend the rest of our lives in regret. A single decision made
out of emotional response has ruined our relationship and life for
eternity.
154
Emotions can be changed: A guide to positive life
Consider going to the birthday party of your friend, and it seems that the
friend is ignoring us. We will definitely feel angry and sad. But think
differently a moment. May the friend did not see you or maybe busy with
his duties. That will calm us down.
Our thinking approach can make a big difference. Thinking positive is

also an art. A positive attitude towards life and people can make it easy
to live in such a messy world.
155
58
FACE BAD DAYS TOO
F
acing bad days is not that bad as it seems. It will prepare the best
version of ourselves. Bad days often come our way. In this
worldly life, everyone suffers from setbacks. It is a natural
phenomenon. Through it, we can see our mistakes and get the chance to
correct them.
Bad days are not actually bad. They are good as these days shapes the
best version of ourselves. Let us face the fact that how much planning
we do, ultimately at some point we will have bad days. So, why running
from them?
Do doubt most of us face bad times. So many things influence us. Escape
from bad vibes and negative thoughts is not that easy. Bad times, after
all, are the worst period of our lives. it seems to us that the world is going
to end. It is not easy to tackle all this and withstand this panic.
Facing bad days develops a sense of responsibility
When we are having a bad day and refuse to step back, it means we are
taking responsibility for everything. We learn to take responsibility for
our words, thoughts, and actions. We understand that blaming our boss,
parents, our partner or society will bring no good to us. Blaming places
us in the victim zone and we know that we cannot face the bad day with
this approach. When we stop blaming others and try to become the victor
156
from the victim, it is when we develop the to take our responsibility and
face the days.
Life is not a piece of cake
Life is all about ups and downs. All the people we love and all the people
we hate, all the things we cry at, and all the problems we go through, at
some point in our life, we will realize, how stupid we have been our
entire life. A bad day is just a period, not a life sentence. Facing bad days
will tell us that life is not a piece of cake at all. We have to work hard to
get where we want to be.
Bad days make us strong
Bad days come to test our patience. We try our best to make things right.
People around us mock us and call us a fool. They say that we are not
capable of handling that particular activity or project in life. We listen to
everything but do not give up. Because deep down we know that we have
given our best. We still have the ability to make things right. And when
we succeed in proving ourselves and our point of view it boosts our
confidence. That confidence makes us stronger than ever before.
Exposure to the bad situation makes us wise
Bad situations compel us to evaluate ourselves. Sometimes, we try to

avoid a bad situation, but it ultimately makes us think about it more. If
we fight against our own thoughts then it will lead us to many physical
and mental complications. We should expose ourselves to bad situations
as the researchers say that if we read a tragic article before going to work
we should read the whole article, not just the headline. It will make us
aware of the prevailing circumstances. We can make a better and wise
decision.
157
59
MINDFULNESS - A VIABLE SOLUTION
B
e mindful of what you say, what you eat, and how you live.’
This piece of advice is not uncommon for all of us but have we
actually considered what it truly means? And even if we did, to
what extent did we adopt it in our daily life? After a thorough self-
analysis, many of us can answer it as ‘no.’ unfortunately, it is causing
many problems in our life. Yes, not being mindful about one’s thoughts
is one of the biggest causes of stress and worry over minor annoyances.
Let’s learn what actually mindfulness is, and how it can be practiced.
Mindfulness is a skill, or broadly speaking, a lifestyle, that makes us

conscious and completely aware of the current moment, where we are,
what we are saying, doing, acting, and why, and focus on maintaining
our inner calm and react accordingly to the events happening around.
Various scientific researches have postulated that mindfulness is
quintessential to deal with stress, anxiety, depression, cognitive
problems, psychological illness, and even many diseases of bodily
organs.
The great Rumi says, “Look past your thoughts, so you may drink the
pure nectar of This Moment.”
158
Mindfulness is an anti-stress formula
Thích Nhất Hạnh, a remarkable author and mindfulness teacher, says

“Feelings come and go like clouds in a windy sky. Conscious breathing
is my anchor.”
Stressful thoughts stay in our minds because we let them stay. It is on us

if we linger on to them or let them pass. And the best way to prevent
unease and stress to gain weight in our mind is through mindfulness
practices.
Not only does it make us calmer, it improves our ability to cope with
day-to-day stresses. It enables us to adapt to our environment in a way
that favors our growth and wellbeing. Thus, by mitigating stress, mindful
awareness not only offers numerous benefits for health but also increases
our attention towards the beauty happening in daily life.
Mindfulness gives us an enhanced sense of self-awareness, stimulates

productive thoughts and creativity. The best thing is, it makes us more
aware of our negative emotions before they elevate or gather, and
become uncontrollable. Being aware of them, we can better control our
anger at an early stage and use our rational mind to handle them. This
simple practice saves us from a whole lot of life troubles including
relationship problems.
How mindfulness is practiced?
“The best way to capture moments is to pay attention. This is how we

cultivate mindfulness.”
- Jon Kabat Zinn
Mindfulness can be practiced in multiple ways. Primarily, it is exercised

either by the simple act of mediation, or meditation combined with other
activities such as yoga. Mindfulness meditation includes noticing body
sensations, sensory impulses (sights, sounds, smells, tastes, or touch),
159
emotions, or strong urges. It can also be exercised along with one’s

regular activities such as walking, eating, listening, or simple mindful
breathing. It, however, takes practice to properly indulge in the mindful
experience. As Travis Westbrook says, “Mindfulness training is exactly
like building a muscle. It takes time to get stronger.”
In conclusion, it is safe to say that mindfulness exercises bring us peace

and comfort by creating space between your thoughts and their conscious
perception thus it helps you manage them properly.
160
60
THE MAGICAL POWER OF SAYING YES
A
ccording to some dictionaries, the word “yes” is not among the
hundred most frequently used words while “no” is. It is not
surprising because when we face something new or different,
our natural instinct is to disapprove. It is because our brain tries to keep
us safe by operating on the by default safety mode. Somehow, this is
good but mostly it turns new experiences, adventures, and opportunities
away. Contrarily, by saying ‘yes’ to them we allow ourselves to embrace
new opportunities that can have immense potential for growth. In other
words, it pushes us out of our comfort zone where all the growth
happens.
So how can we harness the magical power of saying yes? There are
different ways in which we can set ‘yes’ as our by-default option.
Saying yes to presented opportunities and challenges
Keeping the option of saying yes to the presented opportunities not only
allows us to accept the current ones but also to be willing to the future
ones. It keeps the fear at a distance. Also, it averts all the excuses of ‘not
being ready, good enough, or lack of the right time.’ The best part is, we
get to know ourselves, our extended abilities, and talents which we could
not have touched otherwise.
161
“The key to success is to start before you are ready.”
Marie Forleo
Saying yes to challenges is no doubt very hard but this act brings the
most courage. Challenges and hardships come unannounced but we need
to learn to say yes to them rather than hiding or pushing them away. As
Paulo Coelho says, “When we least expect it, life sets us a challenge to
test our courage and willingness to change.”
Saying yes to your gut instincts
Saying yes to our gut instincts help us make quicker and better decisions
in life. These intuitions act as our internal guide in matters that are good
for us and those that do not. Because some places are simply no good for
us. These can be avoided by learning one’s intuition and saying yes to it.
Saying yes to marvels and miracles
Another important utilization of yes is to welcome miracles in life. This,

however, is different from other types of yes. In simple words, if we step
into the past, we can clearly see that most of the best things that we got
or happened to us as a result of saying yes to something. Either that yes
was scary or a strong assured type of yes, it allowed us to accept the
marvels of life.
It implies that by cultivating an approach of accepting miracles, we

attract more of them into our lives. It is connected to the fact that we
contribute to the creation of our reality at every given moment.
Yes, ‘yes’ is the key to welcome new challenges and growth

opportunities in our life. Let us grow by saying yes more often!
162
61
USING GRATITUDE TO ATTRACT MORE
W
e hear a lot about gratitude. We try to remain thankful for
what we have and mostly we do but the real spirit is to
practice it in tough times when thinks there is little to be
grateful for. But actually, there is still a lot to express gratitude for.
How does gratitude change our perspective?
Broadly speaking humans tend to adopt either a complaining perspective

or a perspective of gratitude. If we complain about things, situations, or
the lack of something, we are likely to face scarcity. Not only we attract
more negativity but it also make us accept that it is the way it is and we
cannot change that. However, when we shift our focus to gratitude, it
brings us a sense of relief and happiness. By being grateful for everything
we have and everything we are, we open gateways to greater blessings
in life.
Cultivating an attitude of gratitude enables one to overcome tough times

more quickly and calmly. When we think of all the ways in which life is
good and can be made better, we attract more opportunities for joy and
abundance. Also, it keeps our sanity in check in face of the crisis.
Besides, gratitude helps us enjoy the beauty of the present moment. It

helps us celebrate the little moments of joy, togetherness, the small kind
163
gestures, the little gifts, and the glimpses of beauty that nature has offered
us. This whole perspective makes life light and meaningful.
Gratitude is an essential component to attract better health and wellbeing.

By seeing people who do not have what we have, in terms of health,
opportunities, finances, etc. we become more and more grateful. With
continual practice, it becomes a habit that makes us better with every
passing day.
“Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and
creates a vision for tomorrow.”
Melody Beattie
How one can express gratitude?
Gratitude is about a lifestyle of appreciating and acknowledging each

and everything one has. It can be as simple as a small ‘thank you.’ Yes,
we should say thank you more often. We should pass greetings and
express how someone made us smile. Our little words of appreciation or
simple compliments can make someone's day.
Gratitude is also about positive self-talk about how blessed one is. It can
also be in the form of gratitude journaling.
“Thankfulness is the beginning of gratitude. Gratitude is the completion

of thankfulness. Thankfulness may consist merely of words. Gratitude is
shown in acts.”
Henri Frederic Amiel
Thus we can conclude that if one starts and ends the day with gratitude,
it makes us feel good and welcome the gifts of everyday life. Gratitude
is a form of optimism. It implies that you always remain positive and
grateful for what you have despite how small it is.
164
Optimism is a happiness magnet. If you stay positive, good things and

good people will be drawn to you.”
Mary Lou Retton
165
62
MAKE-IT-HAPPEN APPROACH
I
can do this tomorrow in a better way, or I do not feel doing it as my
best self can’ are some of the excuses among many others that we
present to justify our lack of action. Mostly, we wait for the right
time or right circumstances to do something perfectly but in this way,
many things are left undone. Why not adopt a make-it-happen approach
rather an it-has-to-be-perfect approach? It is not hidden that done is
better than perfect.
Completing a task is actually better than waiting for it to be perfect. I

treat perfection as an enemy of progress. It attracts fears in doing
something. We feel less confident or we are more likely to make
mistakes when our only purpose is to do something perfectly.
Not only does it hinder our progress but also kills much of our time in
making something perfect that can be utilized in new better things. While
it is good to make a project as good as possible, one should set clear
deadlines for each project and apply the ‘done and dusted’ formula. After
that deadline, there should be no time to stay engaged in the same activity
merely in the view of adding more and more. The worst part is, it will
downregulate our talents. When we lack a certain timeline for each task,
we allow ourselves to be lazy, procrastinate, and do the unimportant
tasks.
166
Yes, a lot of talent gets wasted when we do not apply a make-it-happen

approach. Even we start the on projects but remain unable to follow
through. The notion of perfection steals the essence of doing and learning
something in the journey. We tend to get bored easily or get discouraged
when something is not happening ‘perfectly. Ultimately, we give up and
leave things unfinished. Following this approach, we create a pile of
projects that are partially done. Not to deny, this gives us a burden of ‘I
still have to do XYZ’ for nothing and affects our projects at hand.
Following through and completing the tasks is one of the most important
things that can lead us towards betterment. Not only it helps us get things
done but also creates a sense of momentum that holds motivation and
keeps us going.
“The step that we are on is only a step to the next place, and no step
regardless of how massive is ever a destination.”
Craig D. Lounsbrough
Another point to be noted here is that the make-it-happen approach

cannot be used as an excuse for not putting in the right efforts. We should
still put in efforts. We should still try to give it our best. But it is worth
noting that a completed task, even if it needs improvements is a lot better
than an incomplete one.
The final lesson we extract is to adopt a make-it-happen approach and

then adding more value and efforts to one’s each task rather than
delaying them for the sake of perfection. Let’s replace our lazy
procrastinator self with a newer lets-do-it self. Let’s make it our habit to
make things happen. Let’s do it anyway!
167
63
WORST PHASE OF LIFE CREATES BEST
VERSION OF A PERSON
T
here come such phases in life when we feel we have hit the rock
bottom. We feel completely devastated and hopeless in that
phase which is not uncommon. That phase could comprise
anything such as losing a parent or both, death of child or children, losing
the only source of income, getting heartbroken, failing exams, getting
overwhelmed by an existential crisis, or getting affected by some morbid
disease. Bad days occur to everyone. Life tests different people
differently but no one is spared of the trials and tests. In all such cases,
we have two options. Either we keep on cursing the worst phase and start
reminiscing about the time when things were good, or we gather all of
the courage that we had left and start building something new out of the
adversity. The former option is easy and demands no skills. However,
self-pity is one of the considered the most worthless emotions.
“Self-pity is easily the most destructive of the non-pharmaceutical

narcotics; it is addictive, it gives momentary pleasure and separates
the victim from reality.”
― John Gardner
168
Alternatively, one can blame hard luck, the bumps in the road, meeting
negative or sabotaging people, or any other factor that can calm our
chaotic feelings for the time being.
Discussing the latter option i.e. taking the worst phase of life to become
the best version of one’s self is an act of strength and bravery which not
everyone does in life. Let’s learn what it takes to do that.
We have to remodel our old self completely
To uncover our new better version, we have to let go of the past no matter
how important it may seem at the moment. For that, we must be willing
to shred our weary self. Yes, it is going to be extremely hard but we have
to do it to develop new neuronal connections in our brain that make us
accept our new self. It would be difficult because our brain will be in a
state of unease owing to its compatibility with by-default options. Our
older self is likely to resist but we have to overcome that.
We have to find what lesson does the adverse event give
At this step, we have to learn what purpose does this worst state of life
serve. Someone rightly said,
“Nothing ever goes away until it has taught us what we need to know.”
We have to analyze, experiment, and adapt to the newness of things
In becoming our best version, we have to raise our bar this time. We have
to remove our self-created barriers and self-perceived limits. What is the
point of rediscovering a new self if one is going lower or staying at the
same level at which one previously was? Yes, things will be uncertain
but we have to embrace uncertainty, experiment with new methods and
ideas and learn to accept the new us and our surroundings.
169
Just remember: “When God pushes you to the edge of difficulty, trust
Him fully. Because two things can happen. Either He will catch you when
you fall, or He will teach you how to fly.”
170
64
EMOTIONAL GAMBLING: PROBLEM WITH
EXPECTATIONS
L
et us start with an example, if we are going to attend a meeting,
we may think that meeting is going to be fantastic. This is our
emotional bet. It can turn either way. This type of approach
towards uncertain situations is not good for us.
There are different possible outcomes of this emotional gambling.
The meeting goes very well: The results of the meeting will exceed our
expectations and we will be very pleased and proud.
The meeting goes well: The result goes according to our expectations
and in this case, we will be satisfied.
The meeting goes bad: If the meeting does not go according to our
expectations, our hopes will be shattered and we will feel like a loser.
Just like any other bet, emotional gambling increases the chances of
reward and risk. It can boost our morale and it can cause emotional
breakdown as well. The choice is ours. We have to see the potential risk
of making such a bet and compare it to the reward if offers.
171
Emotional gambling makes us fragile and sick
We believe it or not but emotions and gambling are linked together. We

have heard that business emotions cannot work together when it comes
to making or losing money. After all emotional gambling is about
making something good out of it.
It makes us sick by affecting our minds and body. When we lost the bet,
emotional changes take place and they destroy our social life. it makes
us fragile by poisoning our soul. We start thinking negatively. Negativity
takes the control of our lives.
Problem with Expectations
Expectations give us hope, rather we should say expectations give us

false hope. This is the biggest problem with expectations. We put our
trust and hopes in other people. When they do not meet our standards we
cry our heart out. In fact, it was us who broke our hearts. We gave them
the power to do this damage to us. When we put our expectations in
others it does not mean that they will necessarily affect them. It the root
cause of all the problems on our end.
Expectations drive emotions.
When we increase our expectations and attach them to individuals, we

knew to increase the chances of emotional breakdown. Consider a
situation in which a man expects his girlfriend to say Yes to his proposal.
Now there is another man who is not sure about the response of her
girlfriend regarding his proposal. It is obvious that in situation A the
emotional response will be much negative. Having an expectation not
being met will increase the chances of a negative emotional response.
How to become confident and survive without emotional gambling
Expectations can add confidence. Consider a guy who thinks that he is

fit and properly qualified for the job. His attitude during the interview
172
would be different from the average candidate and there are higher
chances of him getting the job because of his expectations. When we
positively expect things and believe in our potential then magic can
happen.
173
65
EVENTS DONOT MAKE WINNERS -
HARDWORKING DO
E
vents come and go. They do not have much impact on our lives.
most of the time, they look like a dream. It is true to some extent
that events provide us with opportunities, but the question is that
how will make our way to a particular event. How is it possible to grab
the front seat in that big event where well-known people from all the
corners of the world have arrived to choose talented ones? It is only
possible through hard work. Hard-working provides us with the
opportunities to make our way to such events.
Without hard work, dreams cannot come true. Everything we want to

achieve is waiting for us, all we have to do is make a little effort and hard
work in the direction of that precious thing. We have to struggle to
achieve the goals of our lives.
Events vs Hard Work
Success is not a kind of phenomenon that will happen on its own. We

need to work hard to be successful. We have the example of
photographer “Alan Mcfayden” who spent 6 years and took 7,20,000
shots to take that one perfect click.
Everybody wants to be successful in life but who many out there do

anything substantial in this direction? Most people just hovered around
174
the events to get the opportunity but they end up nowhere. It is because
no one gives a chance to a useless and non-efficient human being. On
the other hand, if we have talent and we polish our skills people will
themselves look for us and point us for the projects.
Events, hard work, and winners, a comparison
Have we even seen a successful person, a famous sportsman or a big

political leader, who just got there because of the events that person went
through? Surely, our answer will be a clear No. So what made them
famous and successful then? If we look at their lives and study their
biographies we will discover that all of them have done through a
tremendous amount of hard work and determination and that
determination at some point in their lives, provides them enough courage
and confidence to break the barriers and that made them come up as
something more human.
We cannot compare events and hand working in the first place because
event organizers only invite successful and powerful people to their
events. Here we are comparing them for common understanding. They
prefer winners to be a part of their events because they bring more fame
and audience to the events.
In short, winners are the product of hard-working with little contribution

to events.
Role of luck
No doubt a little luck always plays its role when it comes to success
stories. But the role of luck is limited. It is a universal law that the more
we struggle for something, the more door will start opening for us.
Grabbing opportunities during events and achieving the desired
outcomes is part of the hard work and it is the real face of luck.
175
66
ACCEPTING ALL OF YOURSELF
L
ife is so unpredictable, it rarely gives you what you expect and
you mostly encounter what you never imagined. Yet, the beauty
of life lies in its surprising nature. The pain and sorrows you
suffer, the pleasure and joy you live, are all integral components of life.
You live with yourself the most, it is you who can teach yourself how to
live, how to love, and how to gracefully wear your scars. It is you who
can tell people around you, how to value you. When we embrace our
scars, we emit positive vibes that scatter all around us and inspire
despairing ones.
Adore the adorable
It is human nature that wants to care and to be cared for. But this phrase
has been misemployed over time. Most of us devalue ourselves, we
always complain about our circumstances and want to gain sympathy.
This coerces us more miserable in terms of our emotions and personality.
On the contrary, when we adore ourselves as whatever we are, accept
ourselves along with our flaws eventually our surroundings pay attention
and respect to us. You can not be perfect but you can be perfect in any
term you like the most, and the world will know you for it.
176
Self-Reflection
An ordinary mirror displays you what you want to see in it, then why not
command it to reflect the beautiful version of yours from inside out?
Human will is substantially powerful than any other force existing on the
earth. It frees you from the phenomenon of the impossible, by making
you capable of transforming your situation. Obviously, we can not
change our physical appearance but we can change people’s vision of
seeing us by appreciating our entire existence. No matter how pretty or
handsome you look, you will be evaluated by your deeds that how you
treat others.
Past, Present, and Future
We all have only one life, we live it once, we are no expert of life, we
make mistakes, and we learn. There is no time machine through which
we can go back in time and rectify those errors, so the regrets are of no
use. The lessons learned from those mistakes aid us to stay safe in present
and to achieve our future endeavors. Not only wrong decisions but wrong
people also fail us, whom we choose to be with. There the art of letting
go eases our pain and sorrow, the pain of losing some loved ones can be
chronic but curable if treated on time. Because there is nothing sensitive
than a human heart that shatters over again and still beats with the same
enthusiasm.
A Word From Us
Making wrong decisions is natural but pursuing those wrong decisions

is not. You have the power to alter your life till your last breath. So,
hopelessness and helplessness are for dead ones, struggle for life
continues with its existence. The decisions you made wrong for choosing
people or career paths, just take your steps back and find another way
around and cultivate your happiness.
177
67
SELECT: WHAT YOU CAN IGNORE?
S
election is indeed a difficult task and ignoring is even more
difficult than selection. It is an art we must learn to move forward
in life. Life is a journey and definitely, it is not an easy one.
Sometimes, we came across such circumstances, where we have to make
a decision. Decisions are necessary to keep up the pace of life. But it is
not at all easy to make such decisions in which we have to choose
between two. We need courage and wisdom to tackle our changing
attitude towards the world.
What we must face
There are things we must face to get the realization of our true being and
the world we are living in. without understanding our psychology and
how the universe works, we can never be able to achieve the heights.
We must face our fears
A bit of fear is normal. In fact, it helps to protect us from harm. But

people develop a fear of normal things like speaking in public. The fear
of public speaking will hinder us from advancing in our careers. We have
to overcome thing fear by trying to speak and interact with people.
178
We should face the Failure
Fear of failure is the biggest dilemma that keeps us from doing any effort.
Remember, failure is just a phase, not a lifetime sentence. If we give up
after a failure then it means we are letting failure define us.
We Face the Certainty of Death
The idea of death no doubt is scary. When we think that one day we will
die and will never be able to see the world and the people we love again.
But it is a reality we all must acknowledge. There is no escape to death.
What should we ignore?
Knowing what to ignore is an art. Below are some guidelines that can
help us to become an artist and live the life in peace.
People’s judgments
People always judge. This is what they do. What we have to do is to

ignore them and their out-of-nowhere judgments. It is okay to listen to
others but not at the expense of our mental peace. When we spend too
much time listening to the perception of the other of ourselves, we forget
who we are!
Conflicts and troubles from the past
Memories are like ghosts, we cannot escape. We all have gone through
some tough and emotionally devastating situations. we cannot change
what has happened in the past. All we can do is give it a fresh start.
Negative people
Ignore the negative people. They contain negative vibes. We cannot

afford to have negativity hovering around us all the time because
negativity attracts negativity.
179
Insignificant negative thoughts
Our brain is continuously projecting images and formulating situations

that had happened in the past or most likely going to happen in the future.
In reality, these are all illusions created by our subconscious. It is
necessary to get rid of such thoughts.
180
68
READING PEOPLE: PAY ATTENTION
P
eople are like books. We need to be focused to understand the
concept and terminologies presented in a book and the same is
true with people. Writers use words and phrases to convey their
ideas on the other hand people can be read through their gestures,
postures, way of speaking and emotional responses, etc.
Our ability to read people will greatly change the way we treat them. If
we get to know that a person who seems good and nice to us, in reality,
is trying to get some sensitive information regarding our project then
surely our attitude will change. On the other hand, when we know that
how the other person is feeling about some particular topic of discussion,
we can better adapt to the conversation to make it more effective.
Pay attention to the physical appearance
Pay attention to the dress. See what the person is wearing. If they are
wearing a formal dress then it means they are ambitious and ought for
success. If they are wearing jeans and a t-shirt it means they are relaxing.
Look for the pendant such as the cross which will show their belief.
People use rings, shirts, and tattoos to express their inner being. These
external things are the manifestation of whatever happening inside.
181
Pay attention to what they speak
We are, what we speak. We have never seen a noble person speaking ill.
Words define people. So listen carefully to what the person sitting
opposite to us is speaking about. It will give tell about the idea and
believes of that person and how that person sees the world. Words are
the thoughts. Thoughts never lie.
Pay attention to facial expressions, gestures, and postures
Facial expressions are like a mirror. When we listen to happy news a

smile spreads across our faces and when we listen to sad news a sigh
makes our face dull and it fades away. Keep an eye on the face of the
target. Do observer their facial expression during the conversation. It will
tell us the whole story.
Gestures and postures are also very important as our reactions to

different situations are different. It is easy to mask other reactions, but
gestures and postures are there to tell us the real story. We the person is
annoyed in a certain condition, that person may still be polite to the
people around, but the gestures will arouse suspicion.
Compare and contrast
We talked to a person and observed that the individual is acting a little

weird compare and contrast the usual, current, and expected responses
and reactions. It will help to understand and analyze the psyche of the
individual.
Continue to observe that person if the person repeats the same behavior
with the other members of our groups or other people around. Compare
the outcomes and we will have our answer.
Paying attention
182
Paying attention is the key to the whole process. That is why we have
used that word in our headings above. Without being attentive we cannot
explore the hidden meaning behind these expressions and gestures.
183
69
BE CRYSTAL CLEAR ON PRIORITIES
W
e have limited time and energy to invest in this life and yet,
we often lost our direction on the road of life. The reason
behind this is that we are often not clear on our priorities.
One day we are running after one thing and the very next day we change
the course of our chase. It distracts us from our goals.
Being crystal clear on our priorities needs our focus and attention. It is
not something that will happen on its own. It needs our conscious efforts.
We have to evaluate ourselves. We have to decide the best for us.
Choosing is not easy. But sometimes we have to make difficult decisions.
Priorities can be our goals and objectives and they can be the people we
love.
Set objectives
Whether we want to write a book or start a new business. May we want

to run a marathon or maybe we want a take part in a rugby competition.
We have to set our objectives. The main reason that people are not able
to make their goals come true is they do not set their objectives.
Goals are the destination we want to achieve and the objective is the
vehicle. Make a timeline and set the objectives according to that timeline.
Consider having more than one objective at a time it will encourage us
to work harder and it will open the pathways of opportunities.
184
Mark the boundaries
Life is like a big bubble that contains millions of probabilities inside.

Thus marking boundaries is essential. To define boundaries, we have to
figure out what matters the most? May we enjoy spending time with
family, hanging out with friends, or reading a book. When we will define
the thing which matters most to us then we will be able to mark the
boundary.
Boundaries will provide us space within their limits to grow. We will

have time and resources to think, analyze and conclude that what our
priorities ought to be.
Know the “Why”
Our goals become much more significant when we attach meaning to

them. The “why” is the answer. It tells us why we want to do a certain
thing in life. we set a goal of losing weight, but if we attach a meaning
to it then we can achieve better results such as
We want to lose weight because we will look smarter
We want to lose weight because it makes us healthy
Having a goal in life is good but have the reason for it is even better. The
reason associated with the goal will serve as a motivational factor. If we
can attach one or more reasons to our goal then they will give us a boost
to accomplish our goal.
Say “NO” to distractions
Say No to any kind of distractions whether they are people, social media
sites, or video games. Make up the mind that our goal is our only priority.
With such kind of approach, gradually we will realize that our brain will
start pushing us away from unnecessary people and events.
185
70
BE STUBBORN
W
hen we hear the word stubborn, our brain automatically
displays a picture of a child weeping on the floor of a
supermarket for a toy or a child on a dinner table not willing
to taste food with fingers in the airs. But this is not the case we are going
to discuss here. We are more inclined towards the stubbornness of adults
and its possible benefits.
Stubborn people are often associated with negative attributes like ego,
hot-tempered, self-centered, and unwilling to admit their fault. But we
should not close our side to the other side of the story. Stubbornness can
be an asset. Knowing when to say “No” is so much important in this era
when everyone is looking for their benefits.
Stubbornly help the community
Community is the place we are living in. it shapes our everyday life and
experiences. We should play an active part in building our community.
Try to build humble relations with neighbors. We should help poor and
needy people in the area. Do it without any prejudices of religion, race,
or ethnicity. Do it for people, do it for fellow human beings.
Attend the events in the community. Interact with people. Make small
community clubs and try to make the world a better place together. The
world needs stubborn people when it comes to helping humanity.
186
When it comes to education and knowledge
In this globalized and digitalized world knowledge is necessary for

progress. Develop the reading habit. Read as many books as possible.
Education is the key to survival in this fast-growing world. Find such
people who share the same interests. Read books with determination like
a stubborn child. Build a circle and grow together.
When people take advantage of our kindness
Stop saying “Yes” every time. When we realize that people around us
are taking advantage of our true emotions then we should be stubborn
enough to say “No” to such people. Sometimes, being good can cost us
too much because there are bad and selfish also living around us. We
have to open our eyes and see the difference between who needs and
appreciates our honest efforts and who is just taking advantage of them.
Be stubborn in pursuing dreams
Teenagers have many dreams. Some of us want to become doctors and

engineers. Others want to become politicians and take part in
bureaucracy. Some want to be professional sportsmen. But it is sad to
mention that most of us end to not achieving our dreams..
It is essential to be consistent about what we desire. We should always

be stubborn for the way we want our lives to be. If we feel that our
surroundings do not suit us we should gradually change them, and we
will see ourselves evolving in the process of change. We know that
people will judge us for going this but forget about them. It is because
they do not understand what we are doing and why we are doing this.
After all, it is not their dream. We are doing this for us, and in the end,
we will enjoy the fruits of our struggle.
187

A Better You For Better Tomorrow

Uploaded by

Document Information

Original Title

Copyright

Available Formats

Share this document

Share or Embed Document

Sharing Options

Did you find this document useful?

Is this content inappropriate?

Copyright:

Available Formats

A Better You For Better Tomorrow

Uploaded by

Copyright:

Available Formats

A Better You For Better Tomorrow

A Better you for

The intention is to make a better you for better tomorrow.

02: HOW GRATITUDE CHANGES OUR LIVES ----------------------------------------- 12

03: PROACTIVE OR REACTIVE ----------------------------------------------------------- 15

04: BUILDING LASTING CONFIDENCE TAKES TIME --------------------------------- 17

05: A BAD TEMPER CAN LEAVE SCARS ------------------------------------------------ 20

06: ALL OPINIONS COUNT ---------------------------------------------------------------- 22

07: CONFIDENCE WITHOUT HUMILITY IS ARROGANCE -------------------------- 25

08: INCREASE YOUR CHANCE OF SUCCESS ------------------------------------------- 28

09: WAYS TO MOVE ON ------------------------------------------------------------------ 31

10: GETTING INSPIRATION FROM UNEXPECTED EVENTS ------------------------ 34

11: EMBRACING THE PAIN AND LETTING IT GO ------------------------------------ 37

12: DETOX YOUR MIND FOR IMPROVING CREATIVITY --------------------------- 39

13: THE POWER OF POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS?------------------------------------- 42

14: HOW TO ACHIEVE SELF-DEVELOPMENT GOALS? ----------------------------- 45

15: DOES MOTIVATION FOLLOW MOMENTUM OR VICE VERSA? ------------- 48

16: MAKE YOUR LIFE UNCOMFORTABLE --------------------------------------------- 51

17: CULTIVATING SELF-DISCIPLINE ----------------------------------------------------- 53

18: AVOID CHOKING UNDER PRESSURE ---------------------------------------------- 56

19: DIRECTION IS EVERYTHING --------------------------------------------------------- 59

20: BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND ---------------------------------------------------- 62

21: BEING A ROLE MODEL FOR YOUR CHILDREN ---------------------------------- 64

22: PERFECTIONISM DESTROYS HAPPINESS ----------------------------------------- 67

23: COMMUNICATION IS FOR WINNING HEARTS AND MINDS ---------------- 70

24: SOCIAL CONFIDENCE IMPROVES BY ITSELF ------------------------------------- 73

25: LEARNING IS A LIFESTYLE ------------------------------------------------------------ 76

26: OVERTHINKING ABOUT LIFE – DISTRACTS -------------------------------------- 78

27: MOST IMPORTANT FRUIT OF YOUR EFFORTS IS YOUR PERSONALITY -- 80

28: DON'T GET ENVIOUS - COST IS TOO HIGH -------------------------------------- 82

29: HOW TO BREAK YOUR OWN RULES AND WHY? ------------------------------ 84

30: JUST A SMALL ADVICE: KEEP GOING --------------------------------------------- 86

31: DRAW A LINE --------------------------------------------------------------------------- 88

32: IMPORTANCE OF HAPPINESS IN PRODUCTIVITY ------------------------------ 90

33: PATIENCE AND SILENT OBSERVATION ------------------------------------------- 92

34: TURN FAILURE INTO COMEBACK -------------------------------------------------- 94

35: BE SLOW TO JUDGE ------------------------------------------------------------------- 97

36: WE ARE IN CONTROL OF OUR HAPPINESS -------------------------------------- 99

37: BEING BUSY VS BEING PRODUCTIVE ------------------------------------------- 101

38: PLANNING: THE SOURCE OF POWER ------------------------------------------- 104

39: LIVE LIKE A FOX----------------------------------------------------------------------- 107

40: PRACTICE SAYING “I DON’T KNOW”-------------------------------------------- 109

41: EGO AND ITS TRAPS ----------------------------------------------------------------- 111

42: HOW TO INCREASE CONSCIOUSNESS?----------------------------------------- 114

44: PATIENCE IS VITAL: DON'T BE IN A RUSH TO CHANGE? ------------------- 118

45: YOU KNOW YOUR HEART BETTER THAN ANYONE. SO TRUST IT !

46: LINE BETWEEN LEADERSHIP & AUTHORIZATION --------------------------- 122

47: NEGATIVE SIDES OF LEADERSHIP ------------------------------------------------ 124

48: EGO IS THE RIVAL OF SUCCESS --------------------------------------------------- 127

49: THE WALLS WE BUILD AROUND OURSELVES -------------------------------- 129

50: LET GO OF EMOTIONAL BAGGAGE ---------------------------------------------- 132

51: CREATIVITY CAN BE LEARNED ---------------------------------------------------- 135

52: SENTIMENTS FOR THE SOUL ------------------------------------------------------ 138

53: BE THE MASTER OF YOUR MIND ------------------------------------------------ 141

54: CONSCIOUS TECHNIQUES FOR SUBCONSCIOUS ANXIETY ---------------- 144

55: FAILURE AND INCOMPETENCE: LEARN THE DIFFERENCE ----------------- 147

56: HOW TO PLANT THE SEED OF COMPASSION? ------------------------------- 150

57: EMOTIONS THAT MATTER -------------------------------------------------------- 153

58: FACE BAD DAYS TOO --------------------------------------------------------------- 156

59: MINDFULNESS - A VIABLE SOLUTION ------------------------------------------ 158

60: THE MAGICAL POWER OF SAYING YES----------------------------------------- 161

61: USING GRATITUDE TO ATTRACT MORE --------------------------------------- 163

62: MAKE-IT-HAPPEN APPROACH ---------------------------------------------------- 166