Purpose Content Conciseness Genre Organisation Language

& Clarity & Layout

1 6 5 6 6 3
 You are a good writer and this task is pretty well organised and summarised. The
‘Today’ paragraph includes a lot of good information.
 However, you are making some basic grammar errors which undermine the quality
of your ideas and your communication. It isn’t clear in the introduction why you are
writing because in the last sentence you don’t actually make a request.
Additionally, you do not restate the purpose of the task at the end of the letter either
– so your purpose score is only 1/3.
 There are numerous basic grammar errors, plus punctuation issues, including
capital letters. There are also some spelling issues – vaginally, note, advised,
routine……But the biggest issue is the lack of possessive adjectives and in some
cases, verbs! See notes.
 The level of vocabulary was very high throughout your letter, though and you
definitely have the basis of a ‘B’ letter here.
Grade: C – because of the purpose and language issues!