Running head: GROWTH THROUGH RESILIENCY AND SELF-AWARENESS 1

Personal Growth through Resiliency and Self-awareness

Robert V. Abernethy

University of Charleston
GROWTH THROUGH RESILIENCY AND SELF-AWARENESS 2

Table of Contents

Abstract................................................................................................................................3

Personal Growth through Resiliency and Self-awareness...................................................4

Resiliency............................................................................................................................4

Self-awareness.....................................................................................................................6

Organizational Impact..........................................................................................................8

Conclusion...........................................................................................................................9

References..........................................................................................................................10
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Abstract

Leaders grow through a lifelong learning process focused on many aspects of personal

development. Formal education is only one ingredient to personal growth, and one should

endeavor to grow from self-study and reflection on life experiences. Resiliency is a key

component to leader growth and takes practice and persistence to realize gains. Resilience is

akin to strength, stamina and an acute ability to bounce back from adversity. Another aspect of

leader growth is understanding the impact of self on others – being self-aware. Gaining insight,

through reflection and introspection, into who you are as a person and how your role influences

others will have huge impact on the organization. Self-awareness feeds back into the resiliency-

building activity as you identify new areas of work and implement plans to correct. There are

many other aspects of personal growth but focus on self-awareness and resiliency is a good start.

Personal growth is a never-ending journey to an unknown destination and has to start

somewhere.
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Personal Growth through Resiliency and Self-awareness

Leadership – the activity of influencing people to accomplish a goal – is a simple concept

to understand as there is much literature on the subject, and yet challenging for so many leaders

burdened with the task. A successful leadership strategy used in one organization may not have

the same result in another. Small-team leadership techniques do not always transfer to larger

organizations. Leaders shifting from one job to another or inside an organizational

transformation must first recognize the requirement to shift leadership styles, and this drives the

need to reflect, study and adopt new techniques – personal growth through education and

learning.

Lifelong learning is term used for the continuing education of people throughout life.

The education and learning process should not stop once the formal education is completed, but

instead continue through self-study and learning through life-living experience. The

combination of active self-study activity and learning from life-living experiences drives

personal growth. Two areas deserving of particular focus are personal resiliency and self-

awareness.

Resiliency

People become resilient over time and with much practice. Webster’s defines resilience

as "an ability to recover from or adjust easily to misfortune or change.” In the definition of

resilience, the words “recover from” speak to a need to be physically and mentally strong or fit.

Our fitness activity is a key component to resilience and must be practiced to realize gains. The

more exposure to complex, mental and physical challenges we get, the stronger we become. At

times, in our practice we will fail, which is one of the best ways to learn, grow and build

resiliency.
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Flexibility and adaptability are another component key to resiliency and speak to the

“adjust easily to” phrase in the definition. Our ability to quickly and seamlessly assess the

situation, adjust our strategy for current conditions, and execute in a new direction demonstrates

our resilient nature. From the book Boys in the Boat, Bobby Moch, the coxswain for the

Washington row team, exemplified this uncanny ability to assess, adjust and execute quickly and

successfully, which led to many victories for the team (Brown, 2013). Even under the toughest

of circumstances and after much exposure and practice, like Bobby Moch, resilient people

prevail.

Personally, my growth as a leader is grounded in my experience in and exposure to

challenges throughout my career. My unwavering belief in growing physically and mentally

stronger thus supporting my resiliency, is central to any success I achieved. As an example, I

assess myself as an introvert and hence, naturally reluctant to engage large groups and one-on-

one conversations. Realizing I could not be a successful leader without adjusting my natural

introverted style, I sought out uncomfortable situations and jumped in. The Navy SEALS have a

saying “get comfortable being uncomfortable” and that is the best way to describe my

requirement in my endeavor to be a better leader and this takes a great deal of self-discipline.

Without discipline, I would never seek to deliberately be uncomfortable, and without

uncomfortable training I would not increase my mental and emotional resilience.

Along with mental and emotional resilience work, physical resilience needs as much

attention. Many leadership jobs do not require a physically fit leader, but military service is an

exception. That said, maintaining a physically fit body can also produce positive results for any

leader as it is a great way to relieve stress. A general fit, healthy body also helps with lower

blood pressure and better oxygen exchange through the body assisting with handling stressful
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situations. Building a stronger, healthier body and mind is key to a resilient leader and an area

requiring focus and self-awareness.

Self-awareness

Who am I? What passive/active message am I sending? What affect do I have on others?

These are all contemplative questions one should ask to help with self-awareness. “If you know

who you are, you can achieve what you seek from life and overcome the obstacles you face”

(George, 2015, p. 82). George (2015) believes gaining self-awareness is a process by which one

must understand your life story and “reflect on your experiences through introspection and get

feedback from those who know you best” (p. 83). First look inward in order to understand how

people see you. This introspective look helps to answer the first question and should be the start

point to gain self-awareness.

As a leader, your every action, or inaction, sends a message and has impact, and you are

on the clock 24 hours a day – people are always assessing your authenticity. Kerr (2013) says,

“The best leaders remain true to their deepest values. They lead their own life and others follow”

(p. 160). In other words, one must embody the values of an organization at home as they do at

work. Leaders need to be a role model for others in order to gain commitment to the purpose of

the organization. Moreover, there should clear alignment between beliefs, thoughts, words and

actions. As Kerr (2103) highlights in this quote from Lance Secretan:

Authenticity is the alignment of head, mouth, heart and feet – thinking, saying and doing

the same thing consistently. This builds trust, and followers love leaders they can trust.

(Kerr, p. 166).

The trust gained between leaders and subordinates forms a bond, similar to the bond between

family members, that can propel people in an organization to strive for excellence with every
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action because they do not want to fail their teammates. Authenticity gains trust, trust gains

commitment, and commitment gains production.

Another important aspect of self-awareness is understanding the impact you have on

others. Many leaders strive to become approachable, and approachability is key to gaining an

understanding of your people – their wants, needs, goals and desires. This is connected to trust

and gained through availability. Leaders need to make themselves available to their subordinates

regularly. Over time, trust will be solidified and candid feedback and understanding gained.

Your physical presence and willingness to share hardship with your team – doing the dirty jobs

together – is a clear method to build upon your authentic interest in their needs, which begets

trust.

This aspect of development – understanding myself – is something I take seriously and

requires constant work. I work diligently to be an approachable, empathetic and caring leader,

but realize my leadership position impedes upon my success, which drives reassessment. As an

example, before addressing an individual or a group, I consider the environment and how I will

physically occupy the space – standing, sitting, on a stage, speaking with a microphone, etc. – as

every element has impact. I develop a plan ahead of each engagement, which includes a strategy

to connect with the audience and pull them into the conversation. Once the crowd starts to open

up and engage on the topic, I tend to take on a conversation-facilitator role with a destination in

mind but allow the crowd to meander freely until they arrive at the point. By doing so, the

participants feel as if they are an active part of the conversation and the solution. My awareness

of the environment and the impact of my role drives my focus and preparation for each

engagement.
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Organizational Impact

My personal growth focus impacts the organization through example, connecting people

to purpose, and emphasis on building expertly trained individuals and teams. Central to my

leadership philosophy is modeling a proper, professional example. We want fit, disciplined and

well-trained formations so I need to be fit, disciplined and well-trained and do it in a way that is

visible to the team. My example compels others to follow and is directly connected to the

purpose of our organization.

According to Army Doctrine Publication 6-22, our purpose is “to fight and win our

Nation’s wars” and is simply stated, but takes great discipline to understand, prepare for and

execute (2019, p. 1-11). Winning decisively and quickly is directly connected to our ability to

fight well – the stronger and better trained we are the faster we will win. This drives the need to

constantly practice our teams, big and small, under realistic conditions considering all

contingencies they may face. Collective training incorporating elements of the other services is a

fundamental to success but will be less successful if not butressed by expertly trained

individuals.

Individual Soldiers must endeavor to be experts in their trade and basic Soldier skills.

This is where wars are won or lost and requires me to consistently emphasize the need for

improvement. Foremost, Soldiers need to focus on job skills needed to be effective in a combat

environment. Other Soldiers and formations count on you to be an expert. Equally important, is

the need to gain expert knowledge at the basic Soldier skills needed on the battlefield since any

Soldier could be called upon to engage with and destroy an enemy foe. To master both takes

considerable time, dedication and discipline. The time required exceeds the time available

during normal duty hours and hence, drives the need for Soldiers to learn through self-study and
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practice. Again, my example and message impact our ability to be better than good, but to be

great.

Conclusion

Stagnation in growth of personal knowledge through education and experience is not

compatible with successful military leaders. I must work diligently to be more resilient

tomorrow than I am today and doing so requires a keen sense of self-awareness. Regular

assessments of my strengths and weaknesses will advance my thinking of where to focus, what

to do, and how I will achieve the desired effect. This is a cyclic process with only one goal in

mind – to be all that I can be.

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References

Army Doctrine Publication 6-22. (2019). Army Leadership and the Profession. Headquarters,

Department of the Army.

Brown, J. (2013). The Boys in the Boat. Penguin Books. 

George, B. (2015) Discover your True North. John Wiley & Sons.

Kerr, J. (2013). Legacy. 15 Lessons in Leadership. Constable.

Resilience. 2020. In Mirriam-Webster.com. Retrieved from https://www.merriam-

webster.com/dictionary/resilience