Consult Vermin Supreme 1NC Shell

Plan: The United States Federal Government should initiate binding consultation with 2012
presidential candidate Vermin Supreme and not pass the affirmative plan whether he
answers yes or no.
 Contention One: Vermin is God
First, Vermin Supreme is God—we need to consult with him. Just look at him—HE’S
JESUS! (turn around computer and show the picture)

The Mellow Jihadi ’11 (The Mellow Jihadi.com “Vermin Supreme and Randall Terry at Saint
Anselm College in Machester New England. No date cited).
 Contention 2: Vermin Supreme is
AWESOME!
1. The definition of Vermin

Urban Dictionary (The Urban Dictionary, the most trusted internet source for daily definitions.
“Define: Vermin”)
4. Vermin- a worthless piece of shit, much like a scumbag but if you are vermin, you do not give
a shit about anything. You do what you want, and you do not care who it effects. “The kid is
complete vermin” “The lift line at Mountain Creek has an abundance of vermin in it.”

2. The definition of Supreme

Urban Dictionary (The Urban Dictionary, the most trusted internet source for daily definitions.
“Define: Vermin”)
2. Supreme- really great, super awesome, or fantastic “Hey Brice, I got you a coke.” “Supreme!”

Thus can we assess that Vermin Supreme is the best most super awesome piece of shit there
ever was!
 Contention 3 is the Net Benefit
A. Vermin Supreme ensures a pony-based economic platform. This is good—multiple
warrants
Ridley Report 11 (“Vermin Supreme Backers Develop a More Supreme Mission—against Obama.” 14 June 2011. Online
video clip. Youtube. Accessed on 20 January 2012.)
“My name is Vermin Supreme. I’m a friendly fascist. I’m a tyrant you should trust. You should
let me run your life. Because I do know what is best for you. Yes, I am a politician. I will promise
you anything your heart desires, because you are my constituents and because I have no intention
of keeping any promise I make. Vote early, Vote often, and remember, a vote for Vermin
Supreme is a vote completely thrown away… Do you still stand by your word to provide a pony
to every American? Yes I do! Free ponies for all Americans. This is one of the overlooked issues
in America today. My free pony platform is of course a jobs creation program. It will create lots
and lots of jobs, once we switch over to a pony-based economy. We’ll also lower dependence on
foreign oil. We’ll be able to turn all that pony poop into methane gas, a wonderful compost, so we
will be able to re-up our soil that is being depleted by agrochemicals etc. etc. etc. And of course
the important thing to realize is that it is a Federal Pony Identification System. You will have to
have your pony on you at all times. Thank you very much….Mr. Supreme, Regarding the ponies,
is that the only government program you support?... Just that one. That’s enough. In the vein of
energy production, we can harness the awesome power of zombies. This is for energy sources;
not just to run away from anymore. We have giant turbines we have been working on, and we
will have a lot of zombies, and we will dangle brains in front of them. They will run and turn the
giant turbines, creating energy in order to lessen our dependence on foreign oil. (play circus
music) (singing). ‘My name is Vermin, my name is Vermin, my name is vermin..supreeeeme. My
name is vermin and you should vote for me in this upcoming electionnn,’ and yeah…Thanks
everyone for coming out today. Oh and one last thing… Jesus told me to make Randall Terry
Gay.” (sprinkles sparkle dust above Terry) WOOOOOH LOOK HE’S GAY!! WOOOH.

AND a pony-based nation is crucial to affective communication systems—Pony Express

proves.
Wikipedia 12 (“Pony Express- Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia” Wikipedia- “SOPA can go suck a small one.” Last modified
on 20 January 2012.)
The Pony Express was a fast mail service crossing the Great Plains, the Rocky Mountains, and
the High Sierra from St. Joseph, Missouri, to Sacramento, California, from April 3, 1860 to October 1861. It became the west's
most direct means of east-west communication before the telegraph and was vital for tying California closely with the Union just
before the American Civil War. The Pony Express was a mail delivery system of the Leavenworth & Pike's Peak Express Company of
1849 which in 1850 became the Central Overland California and Pikes Peak Express Company. This firm was founded by William H.
Russell, Alexander Majors, and William B. Waddell.[1] Patee House served as the Pony Express headquarters from 1860 to 1861. It is
one block away from the home of infamous outlaw Jesse James, where he was shot and killed by Robert Ford. This original fast mail
'Pony Express' service had messages carried by horseback riders in staged relays to stations (with fresh horses and
riders) across the prairies, plains, deserts, and mountains of the Western United States. During its
18 months of operation, it reduced the time for messages to travel between the Atlantic and
Pacific coasts to about ten days, with telegraphic communication covering about half the distance
across the continent and mounted couriers the rest.[2]

B. Vermin Supreme’s alternate energy programs will be extremely effective

Ridley Report 11 (“Vermin Supreme Backers Develop a More Supreme Mission—against Obama.” 14 June 2011. Online
video clip. Youtube. Accessed on 20 January 2012.)
“My name is Vermin Supreme. I’m a friendly fascist. I’m a tyrant you should trust. You should
let me run your life. Because I do know what is best for you. Yes, I am a politician. I will promise
you anything your heart desires, because you are my constituents and because I have no intention
of keeping any promise I make. Vote early, Vote often, and remember, a vote for Vermin
Supreme is a vote completely thrown away… Do you still stand by your word to provide a pony
to every American? Yes I do! Free ponies for all Americans. This is one of the overlooked issues
in America today. My free pony platform is of course a jobs creation program. It will create lots
and lots of jobs, once we switch over to a pony-based economy. We’ll also lower dependence on
foreign oil. We’ll be able to turn all that pony poop into methane gas, a wonderful compost , so we
will be able to re-up our soil that is being depleted by agrochemicals etc. etc. etc. And of course
the important thing to realize is that it is a Federal Pony Identification System. You will have to
have your pony on you at all times. Thank you very much….Mr. Supreme, Regarding the ponies,
is that the only government program you support?... Just that one. That’s enough. In the vein of
energy production, we can harness the awesome power of zombies. This is for energy sources;
not just to run away from anymore. We have giant turbines we have been working on, and we
will have a lot of zombies, and we will dangle brains in front of them. They will run and turn the
giant turbines, creating energy in order to lessen our dependence on foreign oil. (play circus
music) (singing). ‘My name is Vermin, my name is Vermin, my name is vermin..supreeeeme. My
name is vermin and you should vote for me in this upcoming electionnn,’ and yeah…Thanks
everyone for coming out today. Oh and one last thing… Jesus told me to make Randall Terry
Gay.” (sprinkles sparkle dust above Terry) WOOOOOH LOOK HE’S GAY!! WOOOH.

This lowers our dependence on oil

Ridley Report 11 (“Vermin Supreme Backers Develop a More Supreme Mission—against Obama.” 14 June 2011. Online
video clip. Youtube. Accessed on 20 January 2012.)
“My name is Vermin Supreme. I’m a friendly fascist. I’m a tyrant you should trust. You should
let me run your life. Because I do know what is best for you. Yes, I am a politician. I will promise
you anything your heart desires, because you are my constituents and because I have no intention
of keeping any promise I make. Vote early, Vote often, and remember, a vote for Vermin
Supreme is a vote completely thrown away… Do you still stand by your word to provide a pony
to every American? Yes I do! Free ponies for all Americans. This is one of the overlooked issues
in America today. My free pony platform is of course a jobs creation program. It will create lots
and lots of jobs, once we switch over to a pony-based economy. We’ll also lower dependence on
foreign oil. We’ll be able to turn all that pony poop into methane gas, a wonderful compost, so we
will be able to re-up our soil that is being depleted by agrochemicals etc. etc. etc. And of course
the important thing to realize is that it is a Federal Pony Identification System. You will have to
have your pony on you at all times. Thank you very much….Mr. Supreme, Regarding the ponies,
is that the only government program you support?... Just that one. That’s enough. In the vein of
energy production, we can harness the awesome power of zombies. This is for energy sources;
not just to run away from anymore. We have giant turbines we have been working on, and we
will have a lot of zombies, and we will dangle brains in front of them. They will run and turn the
giant turbines, creating energy in order to lessen our dependence on foreign oil. (play circus
music) (singing). ‘My name is Vermin, my name is Vermin, my name is vermin..supreeeeme. My
name is vermin and you should vote for me in this upcoming electionnn,’ and yeah…Thanks
everyone for coming out today. Oh and one last thing… Jesus told me to make Randall Terry
Gay.” (sprinkles sparkle dust above Terry) WOOOOOH LOOK HE’S GAY!! WOOOH.
And Foreign oil dependence is KILLING our economy—alternate energy forms such as
Zombie Treadmills solves effectively
Fuel Economy ’12 (“Reduce Oil Depence Costs” January 20 2012. Fuel Economy.gov (FEG)
Today, about half of the oil we use is imported, and our dependence will increase as we use up
domestic resources. Most of the world's oil reserves are concentrated in the Middle East, and
about two-thirds are controlled by Organization of the Petroleum Exporting Countries (OPEC)
members. Oil price shocks and price manipulation by OPEC have cost our economy dearly—
about $1.9 trillion from 2004 to 2008—and each major shock was followed by a recession. We
may never eliminate our need to import oil, but we can reduce cartel market control and the
economic impact of price shocks by reducing our demand. Congress recently passed legislation to
decrease our dependence on oil by increasing corporate average fuel economy (CAFE) standards
on new cars and trucks to 35 mpg by model year 2020. This could reduce our petroleum use by
25 billion gallons by 2030. Ultimately, the solution to this problem lies in technological progress:
By Developing advanced vehicle technologies that use energy more efficiently. [By] Creating
new energy sources that can replace petroleum cleanly and cost-effectively