The Elites

By Wilson Stewart

Table of Contents
The Quest for the Pole-O-Bet

I. Introduction and How the Mitch Corp. Came to Be...........................................2

II. Claus and a Detour........................................................................................5

III. The Barrage Before the Mailroom..................................................................8

IV. Into the Mailroom........................................................................................12

The End of the Road

I. Rachael is Retiring..........................................................................................16

II. Rachael Reminisces.....................................................................................17

III. The Discharge Ceremony.............................................................................20

The Discharge Ceremony

1
The Quest for the Pole-O-Bet

I. Introduction and How the Mitch Corp. Came

to Be
Mitchell Markworth was having a normal day at school. But, as he
prefers it we shall call him Mitch. Normal for him, as he was turning in his
history essay from the previous month. Normally, he would have had his
Workmeister 3000 do the work for him, but it had come down with a strange
virus causing it to eject beetle juice. You see, Mitch was not an ordinary kid.
When he was eight years old, a bushy faced man met him walking on the
street. He explained to Mitch that he was the last descendent of a half
human, half alien, super technologically advanced, underground culture that
had been like that for hundreds of years. As you might expect, Mitch didn’t
believe a word of his seemingly nutty tale. So, the Professor, which we shall
now call him, took Mitch into the back alley right behind Limbell's Bake
Shop. There, after removing an old wooden barrel was a peculiar shaped
manhole. Not that it was exceptionally peculiar, but unlike most manholes
it was long and oblong, not perfectly and exactly round. It also later
occurred to him that he had never seen a manhole in an alley, but that
didn't concern him now.

Continuing, the Professor reached into the deep pocket of his green
suede parka. He pulled out a long key, about a foot long, the kind with
three prongs. He inserted it into the appropriate holes in the manhole. He
proceeded to enter such a complex combination and with such inhuman
speed and accuracy, that poor Mitch couldn't follow his actions. After a
period of nearly two minutes of twisting and turning, there was a steaming
hiss from the metal portal. It rose into something similar to an elevator.
But, if I were to tell you what happened after he stepped in, was shown

2
more technology than he could comprehend, was given it all, and was
suddenly the richest human on earth, I would . . . Oops! I just told you!
Well, no matter. There is no time for that now.

Let us continue on our tale, five years later. If your arithmetic and
listening skills are sharp, you will know Mitch is 13 years old.

Mitch was exhausted. The day before, he had been up since 1:00 a.m.
helping Rachael Priss fight off a battle wound she had received from a
Bumble BugZ They lightly sparred for three hours straight. They collapsed
into a Bottomless Pit™ to enjoy the great refreshment of endless free-fall.
Mitch, Rachael, and Ricky Tiberius were all part of an elite fighting group,
that none other than Mitch established; with the help of the professor. You
see, the Professor’s faction was only one of two underground factions. The
vicious Zinc constantly rained down attacks on helpless citizens; particularly
school children.
Mitch sat down at his desk and idly doodled in an old, ripped up
notebook he’d had since third grade. Then it happened. She happened. The
girl of his dreams, the queen of beauty, the one thing that was on Mitch’s
mind more than nuclear physics and food: Ryane Mills1. She had silky brown
hair, so light it was almost blond. Almost, but not quite. For this reason,
Boris Limbell2, the most popular boy in the 7th grade, had not charmed her
already. He always liked blonds, but nobody knows why. In my personal
opinion, Ryane would have firmly turned him down. But Mitch didn’t know
that.
Continuing, Ryane had deep, curious, peering gray eyes. They were
simply enchanting. Although she was almost a year younger than him, she

1 Pronounced rī-ane

2 Not the son of Bill Limbell, owner of Limbell’s Bake Shop. This Limbell is a millionaire.

3
had been moved up a grade for reason of exceptional academic skills. Mitch
couldn’t pull his eyes from her.
But, as the teacher rapped on his desk, signaling for silence, he forced
himself to tear his eyes from that icon of pure pulchritude.
The day dragged on. Mitch began to think this might be first day in
months he wouldn’t be called away on some crazy mission.
“Oh no!” thought Mitch. “I didn’t study for my history test!”
As the teacher leisurely waltzed down the aisle, Mitch shrunk down in
his chair. He was just too tired for another F. Then… BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! His
homemade watch started beeping, flashing, and vibrating furiously. Mitch
turned red as he always did when it beeped in class.
He had forged a letter to the teacher from his parents stating that
Mitchell, “their son” had a rare disease that when his specialized medical
watch beeps, it’s time to take his meds. Rachael and Ricky had similar
excuses.
Mitch quickly walked into Stall No. 2 in the creepy basement girl’s
bathroom. The boy’s room had been out of order for as long as anyone could
remember. Besides, nobody ever went down there. The basement’s only
purpose was to house the ancient, musty furnace and a maze of water pipes.
Mitch unzipped his backpack and pulled out a Copy Cat™ and activated it.
Immediately a fuzzy, transparent image of him appeared. The imaging
buffer kicked in moments later and the image assumed the exact look of
Mitch.
He heard the door open and two sets of feet walked in. The feet, of
course, had owners. And they were Ricky and “Rach”. They activated their
Copy Cats™.
Mitch entered the special combination into the secret combo lock on
the toilet seat. He was off! A crystal clear tube opened on the tile floor
beneath his feet. Extreme suction sucked him in. The “Dynamic Trio”

4
crashed onto a soft mattress positioned at the end of the tube. They quickly
donned their battle mesh; a protective full body covering composed of
durable purple mesh, and FLEXI.
On went the battle armor; a hard steel like plastic designed to reflect
energy bolts as well as projectiles and debris. Rescue Paks on, they sat
down at the rugged briefing computer to receive the intel on the current
crisis. Mitch pressed the blue button on the wide, cluttered console.
Immediately, the large 60" screen was flooded with the bushy face of Santa
Claus himself.

II. Claus and a Detour

Now, when somebody says Santa Clause, you may think of the make
believe figure parents tell their children of to explain the wonderful presents
under the tree.

About the time the whole Professor deal happened, Mitch’s parents
had told him the truth about Santa. Being so young and having so much raw
power at his fingertips, he set out to make sure that no more kids had to go
through the shock of realizing their idol was fake.

He took the last healthy male and female of the aliens and changed
his name to Santa Claus and hers to Mary Claus (he could never remember
her first name, but Mary sounded good as she was married to a Claus).
Mitch had a huge underground secret, cloaked, shielded and massively
complicated toy complex. Every year he used contained silent guidance
rockets that transport the presents to the correct position. Then, a self-
contained micro explosion released a cloud of Adult Confusing Gas (A.C.G.).
The whole set up had miraculously run without a cinch for five years.

Now that you’ve heard this long and complicated explanation that
probably has you so bored that you are completely tuned out and are not

5
reading this very long run-on sentence that goes on and on. Now aren’t you?
Whew! I’m out of breath. Wait! We’re way off topic. Let’s just start a new
paragraph and take this from the top.

Santa was still there on the crystal, clean screen. Mitch waited as he
collected his thoughts. Then, in a deep voice, he began,

“Eh, Boss? We have a prob’um up here. We ‘taint getting no more List

Reports! If we ‘ont get more soon, we’ll ‘ave to shut t’a whole operation
down!”

“What!?!? How? The mailroom’s not sent any warning! I’ll be right
there!

“Best hurry it up! Without the List, we ‘ont know how much to build!”

“I’ll be right there! Mitch out!”

The Mailroom was where all the transmissions between the dozens of
departments came together to be transmitted to their appropriate
destinations. The Professor’s race had built it centuries ago and had kept it
up to date with the changing venue. But sometime in the nineteen hundreds,
the Professor, who had only been in power for 50 years, had made the
executive decision to keep the current venue of that time forever. All the
digital messages were converted into paper format, processed, then
converted back to their original form and sent off.

In the corner of the room sat a clear, glass bowl, like the globe you
would see on top of a gumball machine, with a pole coming out the top. It
sat on a large wooden base and was about five feet of the ground. The pole
went all the way to the ceiling and out. It was colored like a barber’s pole;
all red and white. A small, wooden sign was attached just above the joining

6
point of the pole and sphere. It said “Pole-O-Bet.” The Pole-O-Bet, as you
might guess, was the transfer station for the North Pole Inc.

They knew what to do. They were the Elite Team. They would save the
day.

Mitch slowly walked into the loading bay with his buddies. Although he
should have been thinking about the mission, it was nowhere on his mind.
The love of his life was; Ryane. He imagined she had somehow messed up
the Pole-O-Bet, just so they could be together. He was just about to get into
the mushy part of his daydream, but Rachael brought him back to reality
with a load clap.

Having done it so many times, Mitch sprang into mission jet #9320,
ran through the preflight, and buckled his seat belt. They really only had a
handful of jets, but it sounded much more professional this way. This
particular jet, christened “Double Ott”, had been on many memorable
missions. Examples would be ‘Put a S.O.C.K. in it” and “Bare Hunting.”

Mitch was about to engage the primary boosters when a small screen
with a pint tint began flashing. After reading the scrolling data, he said,

“Uh, guys, we are going to have to take a little detour. A couple of

ClinksZ are attacking sector 31.”

“How bad?”

“Bad. They’ve already set two residential houses on fire.”

“Yikes! I’ll grab some extra med packs and we can get going.”

As soon as Ricky returned they took off and were quickly up to

supersonic speeds. They began their descent into the suburbs to see the
carnage.

7
 They set down in one of the house’s backyards. By this time
there were three houses on fire. Firemen were already putting out the other
two houses, but hadn’t got to this one yet.

“Ricky, you head around front and make sure the ClinksZ are at bay,
for now.”

“With pleasure!”

“Rach, you get back in the jet and help the firemen by dousing the
flames from above.”

“Sure thing!”

“I’ll go inside this house to make sure there aren’t any trapped people.
Report back here when you’re done. Ready, break!” With a cheer, they ran
off.

Mitch kicked down the back door and was greeted with black plumes of
smoke. He did a quick search of the ground floor, but found nothing. He
looked in all the rooms and went upstairs. He quickly peered in all the rooms
up there, which were all bedrooms and one bathroom, then headed for the
attic staircase. Just before he was about to climb that rickety old thing, he
hear a quiet moan form the last bedroom. He turned back and began a more
detailed search. Nothing turned up until he opened the closet. There, lying
on the floor unconscious was Ryane.

III. The Barrage Before the Mailroom

He just stared. There was nothing else to do. He was flabbergasted. He
was speechless! But he was jarred back to reality when the bathroom across
the hall exploded. Acting on six years of experience, he hauled her onto his
shoulder into the fireman’s carry. He looked around, franticly searching for a
safe escape. But when a second explosion echoed through the weakened

8
halls, he was left with no choice but to jump out the window. As he flew
through the open air, a huge fireball erupted behind them.

As Mitch fell with Ryane, his life flashed before his eyes. He thought
about the Professor, he thought about Ryane and what could have happened
between them But for some reason, his strongest memory was the taste of
the pigs in a blanket his mother used to make for him.

But, fortunately for you reader, he did not die. The story will go on.

Double Ott flew around the edge of the house and caught them just in
time. Being so stunned, Mitch just stared blankly at Rachael and Ricky.
Rachael rolled her eyes,

“Would you please stop sitting there with that stupefied look on your
face and sit down so we can get going? We still have the Pole-O-Bet to fix!
Hello? Eerrgg!!!” She pushed Mitch and Ryane into their seats and the auto
belts kicked in. In a couple of moments they were super-cruising towered
the Mailroom in the heart of Russia; Moscow.

Mitch just couldn’t believe it. Of all the houses and all the people in
Riverside, it had to be her. Well, not that he hadn’t liked holding the most
beautiful creature on the planet in his arms, but it was awkward and a bit
weird. After a few minutes he worked up the courage to look over at her.
What would she say? Would she slap him in the face for destroying her
house? Would she hug and kiss him for saving her life? He rather liked the
prospect of the last one. But, to his surprise, it was none of the above. The
one reaction he didn’t expect happened. Nothing. Nothing! Well, that’s not
completely fair. She couldn’t have reacted if she had wanted to. In fact, she
had fainted from the shock as well as her near death experience. Mitch
himself was feeling the pressure. Even with his six years of training, the
situation was almost too tense for him.

9
 “Onward! To the mission! Let’s save the day!”

As the jet prepared to land at the old abandoned hut on the outskirts
of Moscow, Mitch began to recap on the Mission data.

First, he had to get into the Mailroom. That could be tough considering
how long it had been since it’d last been open. About three to four years
Mitch guessed it’d been. Then he would have to find the Pole-O-Bet. That
wouldn’t be hard considering that it was a huge glass sphere on top of a
colorful glass pole with a huge sigh on it that said, “Pol-O-Bet.” Then step
three, diagnosing the problem, would also be quite easy. It would only
require a few scans and a couple minutes for processing. Now step four,
though, could be a toughy. Actually fixing the thing is what this step is all
about. Depending on the scale of the problem, this could be as easy as
tightening a few bolts. But judging from Santa’s reports, the problem was
going to take some doing.

Now that the Jet had landed, they had to do something about Ryane.
Rachael wanted to use some modified A.C.G. on her, but Ricky pointed out it
had some nasty side effects when used on kids. Ricky wanted to carry her in
on his back, but Mitch objected for obvious reasons. In the end, they were
left with no choice but to tell her about the Mitch Corp. This was a drastic
action, but at the time, it was the best choice.

Ricky retrieved a wet rag from his Med Pak and quickly revived her.

“Uh, hi. Uh, you might remember me from school; Mitchell Markworth?
Um, you are probably wondering what’s going on. Miss Priss will explain.”
Ryane just nodded her head acceptingly throughout the whole thing. After
this, Mitch said, “Ryane, you do realize that if you tell anyone you could risk
the lives of everybody in the world?”

10
 “Yes Mitch. Thank you,” she said in a pure voice. It was like a
nightingale; beautiful and clear in the dark of night.

With a quick gear check and some uni-armor for Ryane, they opened
the Mailroom.

As they began their trek down the long musty hallways, faint echoes
were heard. Strange sounds, almost mechanical. There was a click, then
BOOM! A huge stone ball fell from the ceiling behind him and began rolling
after them.

Mitch heard Ryane yelp in fear; or was that Ricky? At the moment, Mitch
didn’t care. While the image of a bullwhip wielding adventurer flashed across
his mind, he grabbed ahold of Miss Mill’s hand and ran!

Mitch was scared. Genuinely scared. Not for his own life, but for hers.
Even though he was practically dragging her along, the ball was slowly
catching up. Furthermore, Rachael and Ricky were so far ahead they were
out of sight. Mitch was losing hope. Then he saw the exit. He pulled on
faster as the ball zoomed only a few feet behind. He was going to have to
jump. Mustering up the last of his strength, he wrapped his arm around the
waist of a very pooped Ryane and jumped with all his might. He had jumped
just in time. In fact, he had jumped just at the moment the stone came in
contact with them. Mitch bit the dust and ate cold hard stone. Ryane landed
on a warm, soft Mitch-cushion.

As soon as Ricky got breath he growled,

“That dirty, rotten Mark Zinc!3 He’s just mocking us with this Indiana
Jones crud! I’m going to give him something to cry about!”

3 Mark was evil counterpart of Mitch who was the leader of the Zinc.

11
 “Whoa! Hold on there buckaroo! Easy. We’ll get him later. First let’s
deal with the Pole-O-Bet.”

They turned and saw the large vault like doors with golden letters that
said, “THE MAILROOM.”

IV. Into the Mailroom

Mitch and Ricky lugged the heavy vault open and the group peered
inside. Right away, Mitch knew something was terribly wrong. All the lights
were off, and it was deathly silent. That had to mean all the machines, not
just the Pol-O-Bet, were off. But why had the computers or the other
department not alerted them? Before Mitch could answer this question, a
terrifying explosion echoed through the room, and they all fell unconscious
to the floor; holding their ears in pain.

When they woke up, they were surrounded by LU4 bearing Melodious
Marauders. Standing behind them, was a Slap Happy Villain. A Slap Happy
Villain was a Zinc bot with huge hands that could clap really loud.

The team was tied and gagged. One of the marauders pulled out a
gadget magnet that was only attracted to the Lithium Quartz cells that
Mitch’s gadgets used. Then the bots, save for one, began work on unbolting
the Pole-O-Bet.

As Mitch sat there, his highly trained mind began to go through dozens
of possible actions to take. He was so focused that he didn’t realize that
Ryane had slipped her bonds and was creeping around to the other side of
the room. Lucky for her, the robo-guard was half way into sleep mode. Mitch
didn’t see her until she was half way to the other side of the room.

4 Lazar Uzi. Also called Luzi.

12
 “Oh my gosh!” he thought. “She’s going to get herself killed!” Then he
thought for a second longer and realized that she was smarter than him. She
was carrying in her mouth a small steel knife that wouldn’t have been taken
by the gadget magnet. For a second, Mitch felt indignant. Then admiration
for how well prepared she was. Wow! What a girl! But he also realized that
the glowing light on the robo-guard’s chest was a wake timer. And it had
started blinking. The guard sat up and focused his one camera eye right on
Mitch.

“What are you looking at?” he growled. “You got a problem with me
being a robot? Huh? HUH?”

“Oh no, I was just going to tell you your zipper’s unzipped.” Ryane was
halfway to the magnet.

The bot turned red and looked down. Then he looked back up grinning.
“Ha ha. Very funny. I don’t wear pants. Are you a comedian or something?
Just a second though, let me check on your friends.”

“Knock knock.”

“Well, okay. Real quick. Who’s there?”

“Potato.”

“Potato who?”

“Potato salad!”

“That doesn’t make any sense!” Ryane was almost there.

“Well, that was finer that a frog’s hair!”

“But frogs don’t have hair!”

“Exactly.”

13
 “Uh, dude, now you’re creeping me out.”

“Well you’re about to be out of business!”

“What!?!?” he yelled as he looked over and saw Ryane was gone.

“Nooooooooooooooo!” That was his final cry as he toppled over on Mitch with
an accurately aimed laser blade in his back. Mitch retrieved the blade with
his mouth and cut his bonds. He freed his buddies and with a quick,
“Whacha!” their armor activated and they started to kick some robo-booty!

Ricky unleashed his long awaited flying ninja kick on the first bot, sending
him careening into half a dozen others. While this was going on, Mr. Slap
Happy was unbolting his sore first pair of hands and screwing on his spare
pair. Meanwhile, Rachael poked out a marauder’s eye and he ran into a wall
and exploded. Mitch drop kicked two and they ran into each other and
exploded. This fun business went on for quite a while.

Before long, though, all Slappy’s minions were defeated in some way or
another, and the three charged at the boss. But before they could get there,
he pressed a button on his chest and dozens of new fresh marauders flooded
into the room, quickly capturing them.

What were they to do? What did they do? Did Mitch remember a secret
weakness and kill them all instantly? Did Ricky try another flying drop kick
and save the day? Did Rachael give them all the evil eye and they fell over
screaming? No to them all. It was Ryane, civilian with no battle training that
saved the day! Just as Mr. Slap Happy was about to clap, a crisp laser
burned hole burned in his torso. He fell over, destroyed. With their leader
destroyed, the Elites cheered!

“Ry-ane! Ry-ane! Ry-ane! 1! 2! 3! Go Ryane!”

“Ah, it was nothing.”

14
 “Come on Ryane, you saved our lives. Now that’s something to cheer
about!”

“Well, I guess.”

Mitch thought for a moment and said, “Ryane, I would offer you a place
on the Elite Team, but we already have three and it seems more than that
would be less, elite. I’m sorry.”

“Oh, it's no big deal, Mitch. It was awesome helping you. Maybe we can
do this again some time.”

“Oh, okay! Sure! Ya know, I might be able to set up like a second Elite
Force or something. Kinda of a backup team.”

“Okay, call me if you decide to do that. I’d like to be on that team. This
fighting villains stuff is amazing! Here, here’s my number.” She took out a
pen and wrote her number on Mitch’s arm. With that she walked away to
help Rachael and Ricky finish putting the Mailroom back in order. Mitch got
in the jet and operated the crane feature to lift the Pole-O-Bet back on its
stand. After that, they went straight to Ryane’s house, which was only
damaged on the top floor, and left. That was it. Mitch didn’t even get to talk
to her again. She just left.

When they finally pulled the hot jet into the bay, they were exhausted.
They all went and got some much need rest in the Bottomless PitsZ.

Mitch sighed. The Pole-O-Bet was fixed, Ryane was safe, and he had her
phone number. Ah, life is good.

But, he spoke too soon. Because just at that moment Rachael popped her
head in the room.

15
 “Uh, Mitch? Better get saddled back up. An Ol’ DroolerZ was spotted
rampaging downtown.

“Great. I’m coming.” Mitch knew he had a long night ahead of him.

The End of the Road

I. Rachael is Retiring
Mitch just couldn’t believe it. She was actually doing it. When she had
mentioned it a few weeks ago, he thought she had been joking. But now
that she explained it with more detail, he realized she was serious. “How
could she leave? Why would she leave?” thought Mitch. “Was it something I
said?” No, he must not think about that. It was a long established Mitch
Corp. policy that after five years of service, an employee may retire, no
questions asked; with full health benefits and a six month food
establishment debit card. “That was a pretty enticing possibility,” Mitch had
to admit. But he just couldn’t come to terms with the fact that she would
actually employ this long lost policy. Hopefully she would let on about the
reason at the ceremony.

Mitch suddenly broke upon the thought that Rachael would have to be
replaced! Even for an elite squad, two was too few. He really didn’t want to
replace her. She was like his best friend! Well, besides Ricky. But, for the
safety of the public, he had to do it. Rachael would have an absolute fit if he
replaced her with a boy, thus creating an all-male attack force. So, he would
have to get a girl.

“Wow. This is going by fast so fast…”

16
 II. Rachael Reminisces
Rachael was depressed. Well, she wasn’t really depressed. Well, then
again she was. But then again… Oh blast it all! The point is, she was
depressed. She was beginning to have second thoughts about her
retirement.

She remembered the first time she met Mitch. As she was only eight,
she was attending the grade school that was called Cottongrove Elementary.
It was a nice school. Not the nicest one you’ve ever seen, but not too
shabby like some others. It was built about 30 years before that time, but
had been extremely well maintained so that it looked like a school half its
age.

It was the week before Labor Day and a Friday at that. As expected, it
was a half day. On top of all that, it was her birthday!

The class sang a monotonous Happy Birthday to her and her dad
brought homemade muffins. The muffins, to say the least, were less than
pleasing to the taste buds, but Rachael still was very much charmed by his
gesture of love. When she arrived home, she was greeted with another
surprise.

Nothing was said at first. Her Protectors were very subtle about it at
first. In case you were wondering, the term “Protectors” was the latest
“game” her father and her had been playing. You see, he had a playful
attitude and was always finding new ways to make his daughter laugh.
Recently, he had dared her to call him and her mother her “Protectors” in
public and private for a whole week. So far, Rachael was winning.

At the dinner table, her protectors were unusually quiet. It wasn’t like
them. They were usually jabbering on about what they and everybody else
in the world had done that day. Something was up.

17
 Ting! Ting! Rachael’s dad stood up, lightly tapping his glass. “I have an
announcement to make! Wow! I’ve always wanted to say that!” Yes, he was
quirky like that. “I have one remaining prize for my little Bell!” Bell was a pet
name of hers that she rather disliked, but at the moment she was too
excited to bother correcting him. “We, our entire family, are going on an
outing to Delaware Beach.” Rachael was so excited she squeaked with joy.
Her mother gave her a stern look and she quickly regained her composure.
As opposed to her father, her mother was very strict. It was only a drive of
about three hours, but for our girl, it seemed and eternity. When they
arrived she dashed out of the car, intensely focused on reaching the old
wooden door of the cottage before anyone else. In the process of her amble,
she nearly knocked over the elderly caretaker of the cottage; a Mr. Rapp.

“Excuse me, young lady!” he said in a very stern tone. “Your behavior
is most inappropriate! Not to mention almost scaring me out of my wits, you
nearly felled me which could of resulted in a broken bone or a concussion on
my part. You really should watch where you’re going!”

“Oh, pardon me! I’m so sorry, sir! I was only excited! Oh, I’m so sorry!
Please, please don’t tell don’t tell my parents! His face softened.

“Run along, little scamp!” And boy did she ever run. I don’t think she
has ever run that fast in her life.

Later on in the night, about 10:00 pm, Rachael’s mother was just
tucking her into bed. Rachael was quite exuberant about going to bed so
late. Her mother was having a good amount of difficulty getting her to stay
in bed. Ahem.

As Rachael lay there, thinking about all the fun things she was going to
do tomorrow, she heard a mysterious ticking noise. She raised her head and
looked around. She looked at the log wall. Nothing seemed out of the

18
ordinary, but wait! What was that wire? She had never known wires to be
coming out of logs. Then again, she hadn’t seen a whole lot of logs like that
in her life. Suddenly, she was shoved off the bed and onto the floor by a
flurry of eight year old boy!

She and the boy crashed onto the hard wooden planks. He pressed a
button on his queer belt and a metal shell like thing, almost like a turtle,
unpacked around them. Unfortunately, it was just big enough for the two of
them and was very stuffy. Rachael clung to Mitch, who this was of course, in
sheer terror. Logs fell, Rachael screamed, and Mitch (almost) went deaf from
it. Finally it stopped. As they waited for the Mega Shell™ to auto-repack,
Rachael managed to convince Mitch, with only three biting threats, to tell
her about the Mitch Corp. And thus, the Elite team was formed. They
realized that even for and elite group, two was too few. So they decided to
add Ricky. And that was about it.

“Those were the days,” thought Rachael. “Just a couple of enthusiastic

eight year olds running around the city wielding lethal weapons. Hee! Hee!”

Here she was, five years later, leaving it all. But, she had a good
reason and would stick to it.

19
 III. The Discharge Ceremony
Mitch was ready. It was time. He pushed aside the curtain and walked
onto the stage in front of thousands of Mitch Corp. employees.

“Welcome to the discharge ceremony of Rachael Raea Priss. We are

proud of her years of service. She saved many lives during her time with the
Mitch Corp. She is the best fighter I know.

The crowd applauded loudly. Rachael blushed.

“Now that we are embarrassing her anyway, let’s get the rest over
with. Rachael, come up here.” She tiptoed up, blushing all the while. “I now
want to do the presentations. Scabbard, would you make the first?”
Scabbard was a family friend of the Priss’s, who knew about the Mitch Corp.

“Rachael was a brave fighter. She knew her duty, and did it well. I
really don’t think there is much more I can say. Without any more ado, I
present to you the Pendlum; the highest honor possible in the Mitch Corp.
Congratulations.” Rachael blushed so hard that she nearly fell over. After
several more presentations, she assumed her place at the podium for her
speech. At first, she looked at her notes often, but as she progressed, she
gained confidence.

“Uh, welcome. Thank you of coming to my discharge ceremony. I, uh,

really can’t say how much I appreciate this. I never though this day would
come so soon. I have served this cause of nearly five years now and I’ve had
fun with it. I have saved many a person’s life during our many adventures
and battles. Do you realize how exhilarating it is to save a person’s life for
the first time? You really can’t grasp the emotion of the feeling without
really experiencing it for yourself. I do not know how many lives I’ve saved.
I do not know how many lives I didn’t save. But that does not matter now. I
can’t do anything about it now. What matters is my commitment to the

20
community and the people of Riverside… You cannot believe how much we
help. All of you here either work for the Mitch Corp. or are family with
somebody who does. I am sure you all know about some of the things we
do. But there is so much we do that none of you even know took place! For
example, we Elites called last June the “Week of Hell” because every day, we
were out fighting some monster, saving your butts. Being an Elite is a tough
job. And I’m not just talking about the physical strain of the job. It takes a
mental toll on you. We even take mandatory vacations every month just to
retain our sanity. And another thing, as an Elite, you almost never get any
praise for you victory except from your fellow Elites. That, of course, is due
to the memory wipes we do for security reasons, but that doesn’t make it
any different. Yes, it does take some toughness to be in the Elites… Now, I
ask of you one thing in return: that you do not call me a quitter. I am not a
quitter. I did not leave the team on my own whim or folly. No. Please do not
judge me. If you must know, I am leaving for my father. Last month, he was
diagnosed with cancer and needs to undergo radiation treatment. I have had
a great responsibility thrust upon me. As my father will be unable to go to
work to raise money for our household, my mother is forced to apply for a
day job. Thus, I have the extra responsibility of watching my younger
brother and sister after school until my mother arrives home at eight. I take
this responsibility as a challenge and welcome it. It is what God has given
me and I will do it… With that, I shall end my speech. It is not a very good
speech, nor a very long one. But it is my speech. That is enough. Thank
you.” She stepped down from the podium and took her seat. The crowd
erupted in applause.

Mitch straightened his collar and was about to step up to the podium
when a friend of his, Quid Spoons, sprung to the stage and asked for the
microphone. Mitch grudgingly handed it over.

21
 “One word, if you please. Rachael, you are an awesome fighter,
amazingly beautiful, and, before you go, I want you to know…I love you‼”
The crowd gasped, the lights went black. Some of the crowd screamed,
some yelled. Then there was an exceptionally loud scream. The lights went
back on. Quid was gone, and Rachael sat there with her mouth wide open,
muttering,

“He kissed me! He! Kissed! Me! What!?!?”

“Well, on that awkward note,” said Mitch, “We close the service. You
are dismissed!”

As Rachael left the stadium, she couldn’t believe she was actually
leaving it all for good. But she knew, whatever happened, she would be
happy.

22