Peer Review for First Draft of Problem Solution Essay

Eng 5—Professor Monterrey

Author:Mai Kao Yang Title:

Reviewer: Maricruz Negrete

Read your peer’s paper once in its entirety. Read the paper again and answer the
following questions:

1. Read the essay once through without marking the paper. You can briefly skim this, looking
for main ideas.

2. My overall impression of the essay if that education isn’t helpful in the education system. I
enjoyed the essay and it did have some good points.

3. Read the essay again and annotate each paragraph, looking for the main idea.

P1: It was about how many things can interfere with students not being able to pass their course
and they chose how physical education isn't helpful in the education system.

P2: Talks about how physical education can make us tired to learn in other classes that require
brain power.

P3: Physical education classes take time away in our school hours and in those hours it can be
used for something useful such as extra useful courses or study halls.

P4:Not being able to maintain the work.

P5: Taking a toll on our mental health because it has an effect on having low self-esteem and
being bullied for not being fit.

P6:In conclusion, a paragraph overview of the whole essay.

4. The major problem is that physical education is not helpful in the education system because
of how it makes students tired, having low-self esteem, and how students won't be able to juggle
their work.

5. There weren’t really proposed solutions. They mainly justified that there shouldn’t be
physical education in school. I am not sure if this was a solution but I guess having after school
clubs and activities that would be helpful with your mind and evolving it.

6. Highlight all quotes in yellow. Yes, the quotes support the author's message on how physical
education can take a toll on the students' education. The author does comment on all of their
quotes.
7. A question that I had was that how does physical education bring people down because it
should encourage the person to be physically and mentally. Although I do agree from where you
are going because people can bring others down by body shaming them and making them feel as
if they shouldn’t feel confident. Why is the evidence focused more on the negative part of
physical education and you should be able to add positives because you have to view it from
more than one point of view then just your own.

8. In my mind I believe physical education to many is more of a breather and since you are able
to move your body around and can help make you more active. It didn’t really make a difference
for me because I already know that there are people who don’t need exercise because they are
confident. Although, I know a girl and she was very motivated to do sports conditioning because
she wasn't happy and she got good grades and became more confident in her physical
appearance. It does take time out but it also teaches health benefits.

9. Highlight in green any details that seem unrelated.

10.The essay seems to be coherent because it was in an order from intro, to the three reasonings,
and then the conclusion. The paragraphs were coherents because they went from topic, evidence,
and then to reasoning. I recommend making your solutions stand out more and give a positive
idea on physical education because we had to get from both points of views.

11. Does the writer use transitions? Mark any places where transitions are needed.

Yes, the author does use transitions and they are highlighted purple.

12. Mark any spelling, punctuation, or grammar areas that you believe should be revised before
submitting the document. You don’t need to make corrections—just highlight in blue.