Whispers of The Soul

Whispers of
the Soul
Binazir Sankibayeva
Copyright © 2021 by Binazir Sankibayeva
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any
printed or electronic form without permission.
Table Of Contents
Interlude 9
People of the cave 10
After pleasure 12
Wrongdoer 14
Unorthodox 15
Drunkard 16
Gender discrimination 17
Stop torturing my choices! 19
Self-critique 20
4 Whispers of the Soul
Nightmare 22
Realization 24
Formation 25
Divine meeting 26
Numbed 27
Shooting stars 29
Devil’s toy 30
Afflatus 31
Paranoid 33
Scattering the vesveses 34
The Earth is not a trash 35
Reflections 37
Binazir Sankibayeva 5
Invocation 39
Questions and Answers 40
Self-guidance 42
The Greatest Intercessor 44
Birds in a cage 46
Words I say to wink a tear 48
Holy revelation 49
My guiding light 50
Confronting fear 51
Disquietude 52
Message 54
The second invocation 56

Supplication 57
Angel of tower 58
Things I’m not proud about 60
Dissent’s path 62
Craving pleasure 64
Another human stuff 66
Caution 68
On Trial 70
Parable: Part 1 Messenger and King 72
Parable 2: Queen and King 75
Purpose 77
Friendly attachment 80
Defining love 82
Iffy 84
From devoted Z to beloved Y 85
In search of my purple flower 88
Love is by choice 89
We know what his soul whispers to him
50:16.
Interlude
A step into the moment where I don’t know
where I am going and why I was learning the
stuff that I was learning
I was hurting my health to reach for the dreams
that hadn’t been lived
I constantly wanted the peaceful and permanent
pleasure from what I want to do and be
I guess it stays throughout my life under the
shadow of “uncertainty” only leaving me when I
breathe my last
It never disappears but it gives me the challenges
to overcome and reasons to live
Under this state, I used to find instant peace
Putting my vague thoughts into the words that
somehow lined up to be poetic
It was at that time I understood my soul wanted to
reveal its feelings through poetry
People of the cave
Decorations are in renovation

Humanity is born and gets buried
Skulls on the pictures, dark is a decode
Tastes are changing,
Soon we’ll be swallowed by a black hole
In the past, I saw my future

Through their tongues
They’ll hang me on the air
If I cross that street of their area
And I don’t know why
I can’t step on their side
Thousands of years have passed

With no progress in our thoughts
They promise shelter to gain
They gain and make you insecure
They lie and hurt
To ingrain a fear that you’ll be cursed
When you don’t know where you are

When your blood is turning cold
Put your thoughts into good words
Recall the time that made your heart ignite
That time will do its work
Sending spirits to your sore
You feel like you’re going nowhere

You see it’s nothing but despair
Everybody forgets the memories of someone who used to live
Every single word that you said also disappears
So, what shall I say about them?
If I don’t know anything good
Presents and talkative meetings,
Don’t give me good feelings
Hatred is in existence
What sort of treatment do they deserve
To help false gods understand the lessons
the deprived have learned
After pleasure
You crave people’s attention

You gain and generate fame and hate
If you fail living under the tension
Smoke and cum become your dope to release the pressure
Money becomes your protection
You cover all your scars
But layers only mar
You still oppress, you still digress

While the heart beats on your chest
You live so does hope
Dare to ask yourself
How come they go high and you go low
Stay strong and find a way to return home

Don’t wallow in lies, swallow your dirty pride
All these e-empires play on human desires
Seems like there is no way but submission
Are you forced or do you endorse
Exposure to self-torture, truth distortion?
You are alone, alone, alone

No one to console your soul
Trading the last hope to dope
Give me that senseless note
“Life treats us like senseless dolls”
Your heart is dying, losing connection with the divine
Because you don’t know what is right
To find what’s right, search for the everlasting light
Search for the best answers people won’t give you

Observe the best manners people won’t show you
Then you’ll have the best, you’ll stand the test
Of unstoppable fights with your false friends
Wrongdoer
Part of the world is living in hell

The rest is feeling damn well
Waiting for the signals
That they’ll never have found
Lying to their hearts
That what’s in their hands
Are priceless golds of the stars
They rob the society to become powerful gods
And we witness widespread abuse of the deprived
Be it public or in private
Watching wrong things people do
I ask myself am I a wrongdoer too?
Truth has to be earned
Is it my turn to be unheard?
Unable to trust myself
Am I becoming food for hell?
Unorthodox
You never seem to be brave enough

To love your true self
Is it society or your family who makes you feel like that?
I guess it’s your mindset
Next time when they stop and stare
Ask yourself why do you care?
Shut the evil voices in your head
Pass in silence just instead
You don’t measure up
And you don’t have to
It’s your body, it’s your soul
That you have to grow
If you’re at peace with your spirit
Then no aligning with the standards
All these bastards try to shove
Drunkard
When you’re drunk, you’re not a person

You’re a monster
Possessed by the demon
You can do anything he tells you
It’s not a God’s thing, it’s his invention
Whenever you’re drunk, you’re easily controlled
You blabber anything that comes to your mind
They say you can learn the real attitude at least
But aren’t we critical thinkers when we’re sober
That makes us more intellectual than beasts?
It seems like we never understand what it is
Why we get intoxicated when we drink
Angels abandon you when you’re drowsy
That’s the time when you start seeing monsters in your eyes
coming talk to you about your senseless life
Or just get you out of your mind
Force you to play with guns
You don’t realize how your shot has killed someone
Some guy who is the only one who is providing for their family
You don’t want to blame yourself, now you just wish to forget
Will you escape or will you repent?
Will you restart the circle that would bring you to the same end?
Gender discrimination
I can’t understand
Why does only the man have to wear the pants
Under the current living standards?
Strong in appearance
Weak in making decisions
Dumb to use his power
To protect the honor of love
To admit his faults
If she errs, it’s her fault

If he sins, it’s just a slip
Because she will play the doll
Who covers his filth
So, all his shame is hidden by her
All his shame is on her alone
Cheaters, beaters, keeping mistress,

How would you feel if it’s done to your favorite sisters?
People bother with the feelings of the others
Cannot bother to tackle the needs of their sisters and brothers
Within these crazy rules

I see a change of attitudes
Some opposites try to prove
What it feels like to be
In each other’s shoes
I’ve heard of the great men too
Who’ve treated everyone fairly
Seems like a legend
Of the people above angels
Since I came to my senses
I barely see them
Oh we, growing nation &

Future generation
Let’s start with ourselves
Fix our mental health
Maybe we’re so loveless and distressed
Or are we still blessed to be witnesses
of the arrival of truth and fiction’s death?
Stop torturing my choices!
I kept surviving blindfold

Until the pattern started to wear off
Now I see through the fort
Recognizing all the plots that you’ve got
To destroy me
Because you know the life I mustn’t know
First, you made me unlearn then relearn
To curse the things, I identified with at birth
Unapologetic about your thoughts
How come you expect me to be quiet?
They say forget it but the truth hurts
Now it’s my turn to speak my mind
Don’t try to silence me, don’t touch my pride
I’m so possessive and unkind
Self-critique
Dear me, myself, and I,

Aren’t you tired of living in a dream
Where you live like a queen?
You never did and you never will
If you keep floating on a hopeless ship.
Keep learning, keep growing
Stick to your beliefs.
Each day should be different,

Each pray should be committed
Wishes do come true, so don’t kill them
You find yourself to be in vain when things go off the rails

You should be insane if this tiny little thing makes you out of the
game
Every time you fail, keep in mind to say
It’s okay to start again
Will you ever stop letting these abusive thoughts censure You?
You are who you are
And they just have small hearts to ridicule You
Be disruptive, be instructive, never lose control
Stay in focus to destroy the bogus claim said about You
They may be right or maybe blind
Whatever it comes to be
The choice is left on me
Nightmare
The walls constrict in the dark,

Tear me apart without pain
I can’t see if my heart is shiny
Some said I’m only a dust
I’d disappear like a shot
But I feel my soul inside me
Lifted in the space
I don’t even know where I’m being taken away
Did they lie to me?
They lied to me
They’re not with me
I’ve been deceived.
I’m being lifted in the sky
Someone whispers I’ll be fine.
After a short reply
From the source of light
I’m falling down,
Down beneath the ground
For a while
I see people all around
Happy and peaceful

Crying and listless
and no one would realize
death is waiting in disguise.
But I think I’m done
Out of the blue,
I see the silhouettes of the two
Coming to me
They start questioning
I cannot hear what they say
Am I deaf? Am I okay?
If I’m dead
How come I’m blurring
I’m misty and I’m flowing?
At the glimpse of the time
I open my eyes
Seems like
The dream showed some episodes
Of the afterlife
So how can I find the source of light
That’s dropping hints for me to survive?!
Realization
Revelation has come to liberate me

From the power of sin
That’s been integrated
As a standard of norm
As a power of hope
To restore justice in the world
Kingdom and power
All they devour
Assuming this life is eternal
False promises are all what they’ve heard of
Formation
Show me illegal ways of loving you

I’ll leave their gods to follow you
Creatures can’t be preachers
You say it’s nothing if the world tries to teach me
And it always will if I choose you
You say it becomes a problem if I hide the truth
It corresponds with hypocrisy
But they call me a criminal if one of my people commits a crime
When I try to obey your rules
Ignorant of being ignorant is counted as a bliss
But it depends on how one uses its logic
They see the case and draw nasty associations with my physique
I try to hide, they quickly find,
Never letting me speak my mind independently
Thus, my lifestyle becomes illegal
Though I don’t see a reason to be assumed as a criminal
Divine meeting
Every night before sunrise

You wait for me eagerly
You love me so dearly
When lovers with lovers
In a deep sleep hugging each other
Let me rush to spend this beautiful hour
Conversing with You, My Beloved!
Numbed
When the voice inside me

Whispers only good things
It’s an angel beside me
Appointed for my destiny
There are also dark thoughts
Time after time entering my head
Then I question myself
«Where have I gone wrong? »
If it’s not my soul,
Then it comes by itself
I cannot know
I only just hope
I am not confined to hell
I don’t want the gifts prepared for me

Happen to be all in this world
I don’t see myself in heavenly peace
I don’t expect it to be
A blissful remote
Even my soul may hide under the mask of bliss

It always conceals
What I have to know
That my heart is bleeding
And I can’t feel it
Shooting stars
Look at the sky!

What kind of color does it take at night?
The only time we can enjoy stargazing
And that’s amazing,
Look! The star is falling down!
Ever wondered what’s been going on?
The secrets have been stolen
Another truth to be distorted
Unless the star achieves to crush the devil’s plot
It will go, it will go, and burn the world with its blazing stones
That’s how we live, that’s how we grow
Selling our souls to the smokeless fire
We succumb to our desires
Devil’s toy
Such a cheap price, accept the lie

Traded your soul to tame your desires
Still, under the razor’s edge, you don’t live
you survive
Don’t you think that all what you say
Are wasted words for your disgrace?
Hide the truth under your sleeves
leave the poor with their own needs
No matter how deep
No matter how strong
All of your deeds are temporal
heard the wrong voice, made the wrong choice
You just did it to rejoice
And never in your life once again
No one is going to tell you
You’re a devil’s toy.
Afflatus
Once upon a time

Souls stand prostrate
Promised to obey
The single source of light
By the time they become alive
So, spellbinding
my soul was then with you
Now I try to find me
When what I need is You
For some time, I felt I was self-deprived

It took a while for me to realize
Heaven in my eyes
A blessing in disguise
Will You keep me up with Your energy?
Or will I be worth their mockery
Please don’t let my spirit feel it
I wish to keep my dignity
Love me dearly
I cannot see beyond the truth
that you give me
But I believe you
because I’m at peace
when I remember you
I have this urgency to tell the world

I’m not the toy they can play with and throw
Whenever they want
You tell me with your silent voice
I should play them in their game
No any other way
To guide the lost.
Paranoid
Am I corrupted? Am I lost?
I pray five times without thoughts
No thoughts of fear or delight
No shedding tears to survive
Sometimes my angels may pity me
Interceding for my sins
That’s how I’m safe and I’m living
In the senseless time, that’s unforgiving
Not a tiny virtue that I do
Can be atonement for my deeds
Unless it’s a mercy of God shown on me.
I always keep in mind
Someday I’ll die
But some part of me is still blind
I strive to learn
This worthless world is not what I deserve
I’ve been created to ascend the skies of the universe
My soul shouts at me, feed me, give me some caring
And I start to pray silently
Scattering the vesveses
The soul, have a moment, please

Tell me who is that creature of fire
Prisoner of his desire
Teaching you how to live
Don’t listen to him
No preacher of peace
Advise to be quite
Then clinch to your Eternity
Wash yourself with serene words
All in pair except for our hearts
That shares its place with endless love
For world or God
The Earth is not a trash
People want to be free

How come they will be
If they’ve already promised to carry this heavy responsibility?
There are those who are tortured by learning the truth
Eager to share, senseless to dare
Those who are drowning in the ocean of abuse
The task is assumed to be just hard to bear
I still have the chance to let my heart make amends
When will they stop to prove me wrong?
In the end,
To Him my return: to Him I belong
This is the truth that will never let itself known
To the blind, to the dumb, to the deaf
Am I one of them, am I bereft?
Where have my angels left?
Have I become so hopeless?
If my strength is waning
They try to disturb my innocence
And I guess it’s only You who can save me…
Don’t let the darkness touch my soul
It wants to glow, it wants to be exposed only to You
If there has been a choice before me
To live forever, to be in heaven

And to feast my eyes on Your light
I would prefer to stand and bleed
A thousand times
Just to know that You are glad to meet with me
Oh, lift me up to the skies
Across the universe, across the seven layers of paradise!
Give me the freedom to decide what I wish
And I wish to see Your love bestowed upon me…
Reflections
My friend, everything in this world is defined

What we’ll choose, where we’ll go: hell, or paradise
People can’t stop sinning
The outer world is more destroyed than we have been thinking
An observer may tell me speak for yourself
Yes, we are sinners too.
This is us who need the biggest help
But we have the One who we refer to
The one who consoles
The one who intercedes
Never betrays and keeps His words
Loves us more than we perceive
So, the followers are covered in a sheath
So that the sights see everything in pink
But as soon as we face the reality
We will fall into grief
Saying “this wasn’t what I expect it to be
Just a little deviation that needs a bit of reparation to obtain the peace”
This is a flaw of our thoughts
Don’t underestimate my words
The more we get into the real world
Saying “La vie en rose”

Our soul will wear off so fast
And beg for more worship
Because the time we dedicate to God isn’t strong
To withstand the ferocity of the evil
After all of these words, my friend
Don’t whine and take your existence as a cruel punishment
Some things will blur our mind
Whatsoever
There is a wisdom that lies behind
Die then live forever
For spreading this prism of truth
Let the light of God glisten within You
Invocation
Nightingale sings the tune

Sings of love, sings of You
I am rushing to sing along
Until the bird stops its lovely song
Let me die as a true believer
Let me say the words of truth
And spread the goodness on the ocean
On the ocean of abuse
Let me feel like I am in heaven
And the worst will never come
Let me reach the highest level
And please, do pay visits to my heart
Please, don’t leave me for a minute
Don’t take away your priceless gift
Grant the passion to my spirit
Or I shall die from the greatest grief
Let me be with the beloved
Let me earn His kiss and hug
Tender and comforting
Oh, grant me all these things, my God!
Nightingale sings the tune
Still sings of love, sings of You
Questions and Answers
Trying to figure out why my heart doesn’t react to the cruel scenes
I feel pathetic,
I try to wink a tear
except for that, I don’t do anything
Forgetting that I have a soul inside
The world forces me to go by its rules
Is it the evil behind the mask?
Where am I going?
Am I growing
Or am I falling down?
The voices in my head ask me to fail
whispering that I’m of no avail
still struggling in pain
I wonder about its cause
Is it society, my enemies, or my soul?
Friends stopped me from feeling ashamed
Through what I’m going now
The wings are so tired of flying
And you may think as if I’m dying
Because you see me crying
And I am stuck inside my thoughts
Questioning if I’m stooped so low,
I have no hope
No!
In a beautiful way, you grow
Yes, it is so painful, but what would you know?
Hate speeches that wrong you
Call you dissent
They don’t let you bloom and act like a deaf
When you’re asking for mercy,
Asking for help
Well then show patience
You’ll reach the end
You’re already reaping what you’re sowing
Just wait for the day when final justice comes to the world
Self-guidance
Dear soul,
Don’t indulge in praise
Know your place
The day will come
You will find yourself lying in a grave
You are who you are
Until you believe in
Don’t wait until that time
Cultivate the purpose of your life
What hurts my soul
Leaving her unnourished three nights in a row
It wants to glow
You know you know if you could only know
How it’s painful to learn the truth
And still living on your own
How it’s torturing to know He’s here
And still living as if you were alone
Standing against the evilness of the universe
Yet He says ‘Hold Up to Me’
His language of silence carries divinity
Which of our filthy ears take it hard to listen

And Always these struggles against the evil soul
Days and nights
The fighting routine keeps going on
Until I breathe my last
The Greatest Intercessor
When the day comes and we will stand before you

Will you recognize my face?
Will it be bright or will it get dark out of shame?
When the day comes and we will account
Will you intercede for me or will you sigh?
I can’t deny my current living determines what will you do that time
If I could only feel your love in my dreams

I cannot wish anything
Because you are the path that guides me to the main source of Peace
Your tears of fear just empower me
Don’t let your spirit leave the neighborhood of my street
So that I’ll gain the courage to dare to all the doubters of your words
So that I’ll pray to shed the tears for our dirty world
So that the truth can spark its flames
Those who try to extinguish
will go astray
Others will just use them on their way
Let the fire enter inside my veins

I cannot desire anything but see your grace
Let me earn it now
Or else it’ll get late
But I shouldn’t die in vain
This life just slowly takes away my health

Takes away my beauty
But I can’t stop amassing this wealth
don’t know what I’m doing
Where I’m going
Maybe not so far
Unless I let these heavy thoughts reside in my heart
Don’t take away my faith in You
Birds in a cage
Oh, souls, kept in a cage, deprived of faith

Do you have a choice to escape?
Open your eyes, devil in disguise
Wants you to apostate
Do you feel the pain?
Never resent returning to your home
Where harmony and peace reside
Never wait for the day when the horn calls
Oh, souls, tortured inside with closed eyes
Say goodbye to your previous states
Fly to the sky

Let the freedom open your eyes
All that you heard
Messages written to confuse your thoughts
About Your Lord
Are lies, lies, lies, lies
To be denied
If wings have been clipped

If minds are mesmerized
Find a way to believe
That happiness still exists
Listen to your heart
The diamonds you wallow in won’t buy you His love
There are the ones

Who Spend the time fighting
Against the ones
Who Never stops lying
There are the ones
Ready to bleed
To defeat the ones who do mischief
Oh souls, bereft of hope

What is left for the next world?
Words I say to wink a tear
Cry, my poor soul, you stooped so low

Cry, my senseless mind, you see but let them still deny
Cry, my blackened heart, having the devil run in the blood
What will you do? What will you say?
When there will be no way to feel safe?
Cry, your Lord will accept the repentance if you just try
Holy revelation
I think my faith needs constant restoration

Holy revelation,
I don’t want to spend my life in the dark
Bestow upon me secret knowledge of the past
I come to know this world is just a journey
not a final destination
Holy revelation
I need your support
Someday these endless fights will come to end
Offended souls will take revenge
They are the ones who seek love, who look for you
When you are hidden deep in their hearts
Sometimes I feel like crying wondering what would become of
my soul
I’m a hopeless sinner I’m not denying
Who is unable to wink a tiny teardrop
My guiding light
We let down our faith, drowned under the ocean of filth

We want recognition, money, and love,
We don’t want to accept our faults
Eyes are blind, ears are deaf
We’ve worked our hearts to death
We’ve been trapped by the devil’s net
So many times, he pulled our legs
And we count him as a friend?
If I believe his words, think I’m in debt
Life is so short to play a fool, I’ll gather myself
Who’s going to come to rescue me?
When my soul will be feeling the pain of hell?
All of these belongings will not buy me His love
When will I kick them out and submit myself to God?
He is exposed to speak his mind
But it’s up to me to decide
When disaster befalls
Who will be my guiding light…
Confronting fear
Nobody wants to disappear

Everyone wants to stay
There is a kind of fear
Of being perished away
Searching for heroes, searching for reasons
Just to feel safe that they will save
our souls from despair, from hopeless life
Oh, my senseless mind,
Would you trade your heart for worthless dreams?
As if they will take you to eternal bliss…
You’re just wallowing in fleeting gifts
Clipping your wings
You waste your time on useless things
Seek after eternal bliss
Its path is just within a reach
Invite serenity to your soul
When it is getting too easy to fall beneath your dignity
Ask for angel’s serenity
Disquietude
When I’m in despair 

And I don’t know what happens next 
Let me just hear the voice of Yours 
Instilling the hope of protection 
From sudden disasters that may befall  
Uncertainty sprinkles its poisons on my soul 
Leaving diseases, I can’t heal 
Will you please dissolve the mist? 
I can’t see what’s awaiting me 
I became paranoid with evil thoughts 
I wish You will send me the light from the sky 
Leave a message of surprise   
I know I must cherish every state 
Yet, I want You to answer my call 
I beg You, I plead You, I implore 
Cure these obsessions once I prostate 
And once You do 
I‘ll catch the moment of bliss 
Then I’ll keep asking you to give me more 
To sustain that peace 
It’s a fleeting bliss 
But when I breathe my last 
Wish it will turn to everlasting ecstasy 

As long as I find myself with You! 
Until that time let me survive  
Uncertain moments of my life
Message
From time to time

I feel so happy to tread this path of life
But what if I’m living a lie
And I need help because I’m on fire
Can I tell me how?
You never know what I might be feeling inside

A smiling face hides more sorrows than delights
But I shall be like a silhouette looking emotionless
And my soul shall never die
I breathed this life
I’m scared of where I’m going
My mind can’t even imagine
That I’ll be living the things you told me
Love to comprehend everything you said

I’m afraid they’re not ready to receive the message yet
I’m afraid to take any steps
As I don’t want to upset
You
I’m revealing all my darkness

Like I’m never gonna say
I’m afraid it would become too late
To stand up for the truth
To light the world by what you’re telling me to do
So hard it seems
To fulfill your prophecy
But somehow you see
Invincible hero in me
Your ray of hope warms my heart

Until it gets cold
You come again reminding me of my plan
Don’t leave me for a second
I’m off to be wrecked
Without your support
I wish we’d felt how big the danger we ignore
The second invocation
Oh, Lord, let your given job leave up to your expectation

Your mercy is my mere salvation
Here I am walking as a sinner
Here I dream when life goes on
But you want me to be the winner
How come I, without Your support?
My soul draws back in front of You
Because I am insincere hitherto
My Lord, what would become of us?
Shocked inside and weak at nights
This is the real mirror of my life
I strive to leave unscathed through worldly things
Supplication
Save me from myself

I’m not in my right mind
Unless You give me a sense
Save me from the wild desire
To go against the rules jumping into fire
Remind me of Your presence
The soul craves Your love
In this little world, in these creepy times
I am surrounded by the angels in disguise
I forget to repent
I forget to fall down
I’m sick and I’m not alive
I’m a poor person living by Your light
Angel of tower
Church bells make warning sounds

The devils start to gather around the tower
Where I am guarding the spirit of the town
Once they ring, I want to leave
Then my God permits
Common folks spark the fireworks to celebrate
And again, the sounds give me pain
All I have to do is to fly away
I float aimlessly before the light catches my eyes
I notice a person praying at night
Fragile creature asking for peace
Begging on its knees
Reciting words from the scripture
I cannot read
My God, save it from the hands of oppressors
Take it out of the abject poverty
Let it live by the identity
You give it with all its faults
Soul and body tired of the violence
I’m numb and I need silence
So, I leave the creature in the morning
Sunrises and I go to my workplace

To guard the corrupted town from disgrace
My God knows best, He is the Greatest.
Things I’m not proud about
They call me insane

As I’m not on any side of the extreme
Neither ascetic nor bohemian
Seems impossible, yet I’m real
Our father just slipped away
But they call it one of the biggest mistakes ever made
Maybe I’m aloof
What shall I do?
This is what I choose
I’ll know if I’m right
I’ll learn if I’m wrong
So, leave me alone
When I’m still having my time
Living my life
Strangers’ consoler
Once told to his followers
The truth is divergent
Divergent it is born
Divergent it’ll go
When traitors and impostors

Heartless monsters poison the crowd
You’ll find the worst kind of people
Living not far but they’re all around
And out loud
My mind decides to think of the things
It is not so proud about
Whenever it rains
For a moment, I take my umbrella down
To soak in the drops brought by the angels of clouds
And remember to pray
For the better days
Yet to come
Dissent’s path
I feel pain when I make mistakes

But God tells me that it’s the beauty of my being
If I choose to change and I’m willing
Couldn’t find another shelter
That protects me from evil and puts me into heaven
Than this inner peace
Deviating from social pressure

With its fake standards
That lets others torn
If you call this treasure
Then dive in its pleasure and fawn
I don’t want to bow down to the things called “norms”

Created by the demons for people
To restore the former’s kingdom once lost
Foolish believers keep chasing the freedom
That comes at a cost
Little have they known
I wander in this world

Like a ghost without choice
I just scare people with my voice
I need nobody’s shield
The human shield is very weak
Unless it prays
I can’t even know if I’m winning the game
But I’m proud of the way I chose to play
I’m trying to survive
I hope everybody can ignite
The earth has a hidden paradise
It’s a treasure if you find it
It will take you to the blissful afterlife
Take this opportunity, tyrants of all kind
Unless your hearts rust out they won’t need fire
Craving pleasure
Arrested by the beauty that fades

Leaving me under the dark shades
I feel a taste of regret and pain
Chasing after pleasure that remains
Less than a minute
What a hazy pursuit
So, I ask myself
Is it meaningless?
Are we live to rest?
Or do we have to test
Our happiness
Looks like a bitter jest
But I don’t believe in clueless life
that doesn’t want to give
Simple signs so as not to grieve
For losing the time
Escaping reality
But I want to live the pleasure of my dreams
Hadn’t the slightest notion

I’m not a drop in the ocean
And I flop for a purpose
I don’t know myself
If I’m on my own
with my whims to be dealt
Need to cleanse my chest
Not with angel’s gems
Perfection might be my essence
That I don’t sense
Without explication of the soul
Leave me alone
Silence is my medicine
Answers may arrive then
I shall contemplate on my own
Another human stuff
An Angel doesn’t spread its wings for a man

Before it hears a command
No leave falls without His permission
Everything happens for a reason
I have learned my mission too
As I am the khalifa
Here I am sharing my random views
The rain falls in winter
And it may snow on summer days
People watch how sadness
Comes in different shapes
Hunger is not over
People still beg for shelter
Ignoring them
We may go high with our “smart” brains
And sigh for those who stay behind
Before they become the dust
And we forget our involvement in this part
We blame God
For the injustice that exists
That we did ourselves
Using devil’s creativity

We reject being guilty
But you know the responsibility
Responsibility is heavy
Caution
Knowers sit and watch

How the ignorant can’t identify
The real place to revel in
The darkness keeps sowing its seeds
Collecting flowers of the needs
Burning the collected heap
It waits for the next stock to pile in
But once upon a time
My soul and their souls were with Light
It was an instance for adopting virtues
So once descended we could recognize
The good and the evil
Now I feel myself like a hypocrite
Among the hypocrites.
Want to be released,
Want to be preached
With honest and sincere beliefs
No command, no discrimination,
No arrogant sayings
The hidden intention may be to heal,
But the outer mind wishes to sting
Attributes of a subconscious deed?
No, I don’t believe it

I believe in the errors without reflections on what we did
And the knowers sit and watch
Anything that can be watched
When they speak, they see the screen
But the hearts can’t be perceived
And I wonder if both sides of them are me!?
The soul can be different
In the appearance of good and evil
You don’t know what it conceives
In all the situations that it lives
On Trial
I’m so tried
They just don’t want to leave me alive
Life is the ocean I am floating through the murky waters
I speak to myself “will someone come to my help?”
And I remind myself of the notion of carpe diem
You don’t want me in your game
You don’t want to listen
I will play in yours then you watch me withhold
From the flitting pearls
Sometimes one wonders if this is fair

To live a life in no luxuries but only in despair
Too forgetful and too regretful we become
Trailing the epitome partly of heaven partly of hell
I don’t like the mystery
Better to make it clear when it’s revealed
I don’t like the confusion
It causes headaches and delusions
That never gives me straight answers
But leaves me insane
Keep it straight and try to trace the middle way

No wrath of God could scare your guts
Unless you see it with your eyes blindfold
But the veil is off to fall
Once you see the promised treasure
Stealing it would be vain
Earning it would be late
Parable: Part 1 Messenger and King
Messenger: You take a gun and knock them down, 

What you chase after will help none 
Why are you cracking your head down on the firearms?
In the end, we’ll be back to where we’ve come from 
I disassociate myself from anything that condones violence 
We usually speak kind or be still but you stifle my silence
Killing the children for being the future of truth
Agitating the mindset of the youth to follow you
Hiding the reality, the morality that you teach your aristocracy
Brainwashed, they imitate your wicked agony
Nobody would know, the public wouldn’t guess
Being under the spell of the magicians you engaged through bribery
You labor people to leave no time to worship God because they
think they must worship you
I see people just travel for fun around your and your children’s tombs
When this ideology is short-lasting, your tyranny is good for nothing
Break free from brutality
King: I swear by myself better have me dead

than call me to follow the slaves like you
How come you to talk to the One who fed you, dressed you,
educated you
I was your shelter when you were helpless
You saw the luxury of life, dreams of your kind
Don’t provoke my anger or intercept the king’s matters
As God does what He wants
I want you to get lost before you become the cause of my wrath
Messenger: Don’t think too highly of yourself

Vulnerable to the tiniest creatures
You never know what’s next to teach you
I preach to you about the one who is the Mightiest
All the love you had for me was inspired by Higher divinity
Out of your own will, you never give to charity
Before your heart won’t rest in peace
Break free from brutality
Oh, my people! Let me teach you some wisdom
Now the queen is being tortured for having divine beliefs
She hasn’t much time to breathe,
“Trifle ending of life” you may think
That is how life is!

God tests us with each other
to make us deal with any type of our evils,
to produce the best people
for the paradise — our true home
Remember this, the earth is only our host
Once we’re free, we shall never be the way they are
God says: “Eye for an eye, but forgiveness is what will elevate your hearts”.
Once we’re free, we shall never abandon our responsibilities

before God — taking all the worldly issues as our common concern
Yes, we will be the kings and we’ll teach the weak how to live
Stand with them in solidarity, feed them with dignity, dress them in beauty
Otherwise, expect the world to turn into the ferocious site

As God’s mercy won’t reside in the streets of the blinds
You may find its flickers only in some parts of the sides
Where people decided to submit their wills to the Divine
And they will shine until the end of their lives
What is left for us to do is to be those lights and live those lives
Parable 2: Queen and King
Queen: You abuse me to tears

Sexually, mentally, emotionally, physically
You treat me like I’m your fear
I never told you how I feel about your filthy deeds
I didn’t realize that the air we breathe restricted their basic needs
Go away from me
King: For me, you were a lover,

I would let you use my power
If you dream of getting rid of me
I’ll make you do things you never wished
I’d rather crucify you on the edge of the cliff
Than see you worship someone else other than me
Queen: You tell me to trade what I’m going to earn

Your offer doesn’t give me what I deserve
If you wish to kill me, go ahead
But your torture is no longer felt
Never in my life, I saw the perfect sky show me its heavenly sights
Never in my life, I saw the angels floating by in white attires
To show me my palace in paradise

Now I see my palace in paradise
Here comes the death
I embrace it with sweet delight

Purpose
When I don’t engage myself in a good read

The random thoughts start to enter my mind
I want to extract myself from society
I get intoxicated with their morality
Foreign to my mentality
But I come from them
I need to connect to be helped
Their energy comes so heavy to my soul
I might not bear it
On such days I start to think
Nobody cares about me
My trust is lost
But I should believe
It’s the test that I go through now
Love is my medicine
When I’m asleep
I take the things like they’re real
I mutter only prayers like I’m off to be dead
Sometimes I’m calm with my acts

Sometimes I get disturbed with my soul
No records for a sleeper
But I feel like I’m being tested in my dreams
Am I a deceiver!?
Then I seek refuge from indecent figures
I seek refuge from disbelieving
I want to set my mind at peace
Someday when I reclaim my dust
I think I’ll plead for my soul
It’s not me
It’s what God told me
Who would side with you

If you break the rules of the game
And leave your friend in pain?
What shall you do
If the world accuses you of the thing you didn’t do?
Tell me your truth
Society gives no space for mistakes
Would-be politicians promise to fix the way
You find most of them self-seeking
When they gain the reign

What is it about worldly pleasure?
Unstoppable regression
Everything we seek is weak
It’s not me, it’s what’s been told to me
A hope I cherish in my heart
A rope that ties me to love
Lead me to find out
We have a purpose to carry out
To tell the world
We are special individuals
Friendly attachment
Feeling that I carry for you

Has been burning my soul from the start
Does it come from Satan?
Does it come from my heart?
Loving you gives me pain because your long absence
Something I can’t withstand
I want to be your guide through the hardships of our nocturne
And this is my confession
The same thing I ask in return
Our desire to serve the world is dissipating into oceans of doubts
Will it become one of the wishes fulfilled once?
If so, we are digging our hole
I need you to be right beside me
Let us not extinguish this light at all
In our journey, now we are the ones who should take the lead
No self-control, will be surrounded by devil’s thoughts
We have to be strong ‘till the end or else we’ll stoop low
Since our mission is incomplete.
So, don’t extricate your hand because of fear
Let me be your friend in need

I love you, my dear.
Or did we lend Love from Above for only some days indeed?
Defining love
Love is a sacred piece of our hearts

Cannot be shared with everyone,
Every person who we fall for
Love is beyond our imagination
When it arrives, it leaves a sweet sensation
Love bears no obligations
It vanishes all the expectations
It sets no rules and regulations
That is the time when trust is born,

One feels safe that you’re home,
One just accepts you with all of your faults,
One just loves me for who you are.
What else do you need, my difficult soul!?
Love adds value

Gives this hue
But it strikes us
Once in a blue moon
All of the rest is a sight-wastefulness
Some may say I write these words

Out of a senseless desire
They’re blind to learn
The true source of this life
Iffy
Don’t you have an eclectic style of responses carried on your

mind?
When any fool comes around and asks you out
Don’t you have an ingrained craving to ask your love?
You sizzled, you drizzled and sheered away, why?
Indecisive love shall also pave its way
Before your written destiny slips away and your other half gets
changed
It’s the mind that is mostly stopping us
It’s the tongue of hearts that are usually sealed
We are afraid of being coldly received or wrongly perceived
So, we’d rather conceal
And bottle up the feelings until we wipe our tears
Learning the most feared happen
Rolling up in bed, we think of ways to disconnect and forget
It’s the memory we think we’ll regret
But it gives us pleasure when the time puts its distance
We get relieved, we didn’t confess
Well, it’s not written in our destiny
It was a symphony of God’s silence
That stuck you in-between
From devoted Z to beloved Y
Perhaps I’ll never be proud of me

Of this my thing
For loving you as if you’re real
I guess I was a fool
Endlessly dreaming about you
When I was weeping and staring at your pictures
You might have been sleeping
Without feeling that I need you
Slightly true
Upon my will, I submitted my emotions to you
Once I saw the beauty of your body

My imagination ruled my mind to draw your inner qualities
Perhaps we’ve never even met before
In the age of souls
That’s why you’re distant from me in this world
An attachment could deprive me of my senses

Unless I start to learn a lesson
What is mine will be mine
What is not will pass by
Still searching for the divine wisdom
Behind the love that’s unreturned
That only hurts
I guess it’s not me

who shall take on the veil on the face
To hide the grace
Gifted by divinity
It’s not me
Who shall keep
The stones on the mouth
Whenever I start to talk
Cause whenever I hear your husky voice
My conscience gives no choice
but leave me out
So that all I can do
Is to follow You!
While I think that I’m relieved

I’m no longer obsessed with you indeed
From time to time
Temptation may come
I can’t speak for myself
I can only seek help
From Almighty God
To fall out of love
For the hearts, I don’t possess
Everything loses its worth

Once I start to believe your words
Can you sing for me one time?
Before I say to you goodbye?
In search of my purple flower
Where is the flower I would devour?

I wish it grows waiting for a blessed hour
To unite with me
To ignite the light of harmony
As time goes by, I cast a doubt
Will I ever find my only flower among the crowd?
Am I impatient or is it a fate to be alone
Or spend it with the one who doesn’t make me glow
This transient world, full of temptations, comes so heavy for my
soul
You reply: “What would you know?
Nothing better than I do!”
And I wish my heart would trust You!
You, Who Gives me so much hope
Love is by choice
Dark forces said we don’t decide who we love

Our minds get hypnotized
That’s why it’s called at-first-sight
Well, let me tell you so you know
The less we’ll eat the shit they feed us,
The less we’ll be mesmerized
By the angels in disguise
2017-2021
The End

Whispers of The Soul

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Whispers of The Soul

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Whispers of

People of the cave 10

Stop torturing my choices! 19

Scattering the vesveses 34

The Earth is not a trash 35

Questions and Answers 40

The Greatest Intercessor 44

Words I say to wink a tear 48

The second invocation 56

Things I’m not proud about 60

Another human stuff 66

Parable: Part 1 Messenger and King 72

Parable 2: Queen and King 75

From devoted Z to beloved Y 85

In search of my purple flower 88

People of the cave

Decorations are in renovation

In the past, I saw my future

Thousands of years have passed

When you don’t know where you are

You feel like you’re going nowhere

You crave people’s attention

You still oppress, you still digress

Stay strong and find a way to return home

You are alone, alone, alone

Search for the best answers people won’t give you

Part of the world is living in hell

You never seem to be brave enough

When you’re drunk, you’re not a person

If she errs, it’s her fault

Cheaters, beaters, keeping mistress,

Within these crazy rules

Oh we, growing nation &

Stop torturing my choices!

I kept surviving blindfold

Dear me, myself, and I,

Each day should be different,

You find yourself to be in vain when things go off the rails

The walls constrict in the dark,

Happy and peaceful

Revelation has come to liberate me

Show me illegal ways of loving you

Every night before sunrise

When the voice inside me

I don’t want the gifts prepared for me

Even my soul may hide under the mask of bliss

Look at the sky!

Such a cheap price, accept the lie

Once upon a time

For some time, I felt I was self-deprived

I have this urgency to tell the world

Scattering the vesveses

The soul, have a moment, please

The Earth is not a trash

People want to be free

To live forever, to be in heaven

My friend, everything in this world is defined

Saying “La vie en rose”

When I’m in despair 

Wish it will turn to everlasting ecstasy 

Messenger: You take a gun and knock them down, 