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Whispers of The Soul
Whispers of The Soul
Whispers of The Soul
the Soul
Binazir Sankibayeva
Copyright © 2021 by Binazir Sankibayeva
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any
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Table Of Contents
Interlude 9
After pleasure 12
Wrongdoer 14
Unorthodox 15
Drunkard 16
Gender discrimination 17
Self-critique 20
4 Whispers of the Soul
Nightmare 22
Realization 24
Formation 25
Divine meeting 26
Numbed 27
Shooting stars 29
Devil’s toy 30
Afflatus 31
Paranoid 33
Reflections 37
Binazir Sankibayeva 5
Invocation 39
Self-guidance 42
Birds in a cage 46
Holy revelation 49
My guiding light 50
Confronting fear 51
Disquietude 52
Message 54
Supplication 57
Angel of tower 58
Dissent’s path 62
Craving pleasure 64
Caution 68
On Trial 70
Purpose 77
Friendly attachment 80
Binazir Sankibayeva 7
Defining love 82
Iffy 84
Love is by choice 89
We know what his soul whispers to him
50:16.
Interlude
A step into the moment where I don’t know
where I am going and why I was learning the
stuff that I was learning
I was hurting my health to reach for the dreams
that hadn’t been lived
I constantly wanted the peaceful and permanent
pleasure from what I want to do and be
I guess it stays throughout my life under the
shadow of “uncertainty” only leaving me when I
breathe my last
It never disappears but it gives me the challenges
to overcome and reasons to live
Under this state, I used to find instant peace
Putting my vague thoughts into the words that
somehow lined up to be poetic
It was at that time I understood my soul wanted to
reveal its feelings through poetry
10 Whispers of the Soul
After pleasure
Wrongdoer
Unorthodox
Drunkard
Gender discrimination
I can’t understand
Why does only the man have to wear the pants
Under the current living standards?
Strong in appearance
Weak in making decisions
Dumb to use his power
To protect the honor of love
To admit his faults
Self-critique
Will you ever stop letting these abusive thoughts censure You?
You are who you are
And they just have small hearts to ridicule You
Be disruptive, be instructive, never lose control
Stay in focus to destroy the bogus claim said about You
They may be right or maybe blind
Whatever it comes to be
The choice is left on me
22 Whispers of the Soul
Nightmare
For a while
I see people all around
Binazir Sankibayeva 23
Realization
Formation
Divine meeting
Numbed
Shooting stars
Devil’s toy
Afflatus
Paranoid
Am I corrupted? Am I lost?
I pray five times without thoughts
No thoughts of fear or delight
No shedding tears to survive
Sometimes my angels may pity me
Interceding for my sins
That’s how I’m safe and I’m living
In the senseless time, that’s unforgiving
Not a tiny virtue that I do
Can be atonement for my deeds
Unless it’s a mercy of God shown on me.
I always keep in mind
Someday I’ll die
But some part of me is still blind
I strive to learn
This worthless world is not what I deserve
I’ve been created to ascend the skies of the universe
My soul shouts at me, feed me, give me some caring
And I start to pray silently
34 Whispers of the Soul
Reflections
Invocation
Trying to figure out why my heart doesn’t react to the cruel scenes
I feel pathetic,
I try to wink a tear
except for that, I don’t do anything
Forgetting that I have a soul inside
The world forces me to go by its rules
Is it the evil behind the mask?
Where am I going?
Am I growing
Or am I falling down?
The voices in my head ask me to fail
whispering that I’m of no avail
still struggling in pain
I wonder about its cause
Is it society, my enemies, or my soul?
Friends stopped me from feeling ashamed
Through what I’m going now
The wings are so tired of flying
And you may think as if I’m dying
Because you see me crying
And I am stuck inside my thoughts
Questioning if I’m stooped so low,
Binazir Sankibayeva 41
I have no hope
No!
In a beautiful way, you grow
Yes, it is so painful, but what would you know?
Hate speeches that wrong you
Call you dissent
They don’t let you bloom and act like a deaf
When you’re asking for mercy,
Asking for help
Well then show patience
You’ll reach the end
You’re already reaping what you’re sowing
Just wait for the day when final justice comes to the world
42 Whispers of the Soul
Self-guidance
Dear soul,
Don’t indulge in praise
Know your place
The day will come
You will find yourself lying in a grave
You are who you are
Until you believe in
Don’t wait until that time
Cultivate the purpose of your life
What hurts my soul
Leaving her unnourished three nights in a row
It wants to glow
You know you know if you could only know
How it’s painful to learn the truth
And still living on your own
How it’s torturing to know He’s here
And still living as if you were alone
Standing against the evilness of the universe
Yet He says ‘Hold Up to Me’
His language of silence carries divinity
Binazir Sankibayeva 43
So that I’ll gain the courage to dare to all the doubters of your words
So that I’ll pray to shed the tears for our dirty world
So that the truth can spark its flames
Those who try to extinguish
will go astray
Others will just use them on their way
Binazir Sankibayeva 45
Birds in a cage
Holy revelation
My guiding light
Confronting fear
Disquietude
Message
So hard it seems
To fulfill your prophecy
But somehow you see
Invincible hero in me
Supplication
Angel of tower
Strangers’ consoler
Once told to his followers
The truth is divergent
Divergent it is born
Divergent it’ll go
Binazir Sankibayeva 61
Whenever it rains
For a moment, I take my umbrella down
To soak in the drops brought by the angels of clouds
And remember to pray
For the better days
Yet to come
62 Whispers of the Soul
Dissent’s path
Craving pleasure
Caution
On Trial
I’m so tried
They just don’t want to leave me alive
Life is the ocean I am floating through the murky waters
I speak to myself “will someone come to my help?”
And I remind myself of the notion of carpe diem
You don’t want me in your game
You don’t want to listen
I will play in yours then you watch me withhold
From the flitting pearls
Purpose
Friendly attachment
Defining love
Iffy
Love is by choice
2017-2021
The End