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Federico Garcia

English Composition

August 12, 2021

Success: Society's Measurement

Today's society has a very strong stance on what success means. There is a particular view of

how things should look and be done. Fame, fortune, and power are commonly at the root of what

success looks like. However, there are broader definitions that may be more appropriate and that some

of our society prescribes to. Happiness one attains in life through the achievements of dreams better

defines success and from this perspective, we take into account the uniqueness of every individual,

allowing people to dream and achieve what they find meaningful.

It is important to understand the meaning of success and how it has transformed over time.

Historically, man sought success in many different ways. Take ancient civilizations for instance. Cave

walls are imprinted with stories of hunting for family. The Ancient Greeks were obsessed with

performing heroic deeds. The medieval European Christians were about martyrdom and upholding

saintly principles. Men rose to power after fighting through wars because justice had been served.

Success at one point was not necessarily placed on monetary value but rather the outcome of events.

The result of these events alludes to the dreams men had and the satisfaction they got from the success

of such events.

Over time, the world has evolved in how they feel about success. Technological advancements

in recent years has really transformed how people feel about success. Television, movies and the

internet drive the ability for one to see another more closely and in ways that were not there previously.

Comparing people to one another is often at the heart of how people describe success. One prime

example is that people often look up to celebrities such as movie stars, artists, and musicians. Many

people look admiringly at these celebrities and even try to achieve the lifestyle they appear to live.
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People compare these individuals and often measure their own success by the similarities or differences

between them. Furthermore, some admire those with power, such as politicians and entrepreneurs.

Interestingly, everyone chooses to admire people they feel are successful and society doesn't always

agree with one another on this. While one person may find a particular politician successful, another

may feel quite differently about them. Again, the definition that we are each unique, desire different

qualities, and find happiness in different things rings true.

However, the debate continues on the meaning of success. Many define it by taking into

account how they do things. For instance, having patience may be important. For some, it is what they

get in return from different entities, people, monetarily or possibly intrinsically. For others, it is what

they amass in life and leave behind that makes them feel good. Most of those things can count as some

part of society's overall image of a person. The question is, do those things create happy individuals

and does one's image provide a real definition?

The attainment of celebrity, wealth, and power, while often viewed as a qualifier of success, is a

perspective that generations are learning to challenge. When looking at those in the sphere of fame and

money, they fall subject to the same downfalls that those of modest means and sometime more severe

consequences. Many renowned actors and actresses, musicians, and politicians fall victim to the

pressure and stress of fame and struggle to form meaningful relationships, maintain mental health,

sobriety and the goodwill of the general public. If fame and wealth are the true measure of success,

would we see these stories about high profile divorce, drug addiction and financial downfall of

prominent members of society?

Not everyone in today's society desires success in monetary terms. Some of today's very

influential people have defined it very differently and many of the definitions used do not refer to

monetary value or the things acquired in life. For instance, Maya Angelou stated that success is liking

yourself, liking what you do and liking how you do it. Former first lady, Michelle Obama, said that
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success isn't about how much money you make but about the difference you make in people's lives.

These very prominent people have stated it quite well. Each person is unique and his or her journey in

life is different.

Going back to the individuals we discussed earlier, we are inundated by a society that holds

people in powerful positions as “having it all.” They appear to be successful because they are

influential and tend to have monetary value that people admire. Some would argue whether these

individuals are truly happy. This could be detrimental if someone is unable to achieve the fame,

money, or power these individuals have. Success is a relative term and its meaning changes from one

person to another. Therefore, a more expansive definition should be used. The ability to feel content

with one's life and the achievement of goals set forth is a comprehensive definition of success.

One way to think about this approach is by looking at people who acquire very little in terms of

money or material items. They don't have much but yet many are quite happy. They would say theory

are successful at what they have attempted to accomplish. Another example is the stay-at-home mom

or dad. These individuals create a peaceful and nurturing family environment and feel the success

when their children are happy and healthy. It is safe to say that even society looks upon these

accomplishments as successful.

To summarize, a prosperous life is not strictly about having all the materialistic comforts

around. To some extent, this may be true as it's important to have the things needed for survival. How

much is enough though? This is only one very microscopic way to measure someone's success. There

are many other ways to achieve it. In the end, happiness derived from accomplishing meaningful goals

is what seems to matter most.

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Questions

1. What is the significance of your essay? Why should readers care about what you have written?

I feel this subject is very pertinent to today's society and especially our youth. It is important

that people find their way in life, enjoying every aspect of what they do and not worrying so

much about what other people consider successful. I am passionate about this topic, and I feel

that I am able to reach people in a way that makes them think.

2. Which areas of your draft do you think will benefit most from revision?

I feel that the organization of the paper could benefit from further revision. I struggled most

with the flow of the paper.

3. Consider the strengths and weaknesses of your writing. How can you capitalize on your

strengths and improve on your weaknesses in future essays?

I think the variance in sentence structure comes easily to me. I can capitalize on this by creating

a more fluid paper that flows in a more organized way. I feel that the paragraphs stay on topic

but may need to be placed in a different order.

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Touchstone 2.2 Rubric and Feedback

Rubric Category Feedback Score

Image Analysis OR This essay places a clear

Extended Definition focus on a specific word,
success, which it explores
through a series of developed
paragraphs. The thesis and Proficient
paragraph topics are strong,
with good examples and
development. Mostly, my
suggestions are not about big
issues but specific, isolated
things, so see above for
comments

Working Thesis The thesis is well-written and

clear. See notes above. Proficient

Organization The essay is well-organized.

A few revisions of topic and
ending sentences will Proficient
enhance the overall flow.

Style and Tone This essay is well written,

maintaining a relatively Advanced
neutral tone. 

Focus There’s a good sense of

focus throughout, with only
minor exceptions noted Proficient
above. 

Conventions Purely in technical terms, I

see virtually no errors or Advanced
issues.

Think About Your Thank you for this thoughtful

Writing response to each question. I Advanced
enjoyed reading your
thoughts.

Overall Score and Feedback: 8/10

Federico: this essay is very good. There are no major issues here, just a
variety of minor or isolated ones that will together work to elevate your work.
You do a great job providing specific, logical, clear explanation and analysis—
good luck with your final draft. Ryan