HANDOUT W1.

I. Read the following sentences and remove unnecessary words.

1. The two centres will merge together next month.

=> The two centres will merge next month

2. Please refer back to my investigation report on the incident.

=> Please refer to my investigation report on the incident.

3. The management would like to take this opportunity to congratulate our marketing team on the
HKMA award.

=> The management congratulates our marketing department team on the HKMA award.

4. I am writing to tell you that your account shows a balance of $5888.50.

=> Your account shows a balance of $5888.50.

5. The Board came to the decision to approve the proposal by a majority of 9 to 3.

=> The committee approved the proposal by a majority of 9 to 3

II. Read the following sentences and rewrite them to make them more concise and the meaning clearer.
1. Let me repeat again, at this moment in time, it is the customary practice of this company to place an
emphasis on team spirit.

=> Let me repeat that it is the practice of this company to emphasize team spirit

2. I am afraid I am not in a position to grant your request unless you inform me of the reason why you
need the information.

=> I can approve your request if you explain why you need the information.

3. If there is anything you require explanation or further particulars, we shall be glad to furnish such
additional details as may be required by telephone.

=> If you have any questions, please phone

4. It is important that you shall read the notes, advice and information detailed opposite then complete
the form overleaf (all sections) prior to its immediate return to the University by way of the envelope
provided

=> Please read the notes opposite before you fill in the form. Then send it back to us as soon as possible
in the envelope provided.

III. Use parallelism to rewrite the following sentences.

1. The new online system has improved response time, the number of mistakes has been reduced
and there seem to be fewer complaints as a result.
=> The new ordering system has improved response time, reduced the number of errors, and
made the customers happier as a result
2. The benefts of the new procedures are:

• they will save time by removing unnecessary administration;

• participants will get a faster response to their enquiries;

• more efective records of communication with clients;

• ensuring greater transparency in transactions.

The new procedures will:

 save time by removing unnecessary administration

 produce a faster response to their enquiries
 provide more effective records of communication with clients
 ensure greater transparency in transactions.