Words To Avoid

by =DarlingMionette

"Words To Avoid In Creative Writing"

We've all heard there are some no-no words in creative writing - these are words that
you want to avoid "at all costs" some people say, but do you know which they are, and
why you should avoid them?  Well, I didn't the first time I saw a list of "words to
avoid", and not surprisingly, a lot of people who write these lists don't know why either.
(I know, SHOCK! GASP! just because someone wrote a guide doesn't mean they know
what they're talking about.)

So, this morning I went on a word-finding spree to find these "word lists" and find out
WHY I was supposed to avoid these words - and more importantly, HOW.  This guide
will explain what I discovered.

WARNING: Quite often in this guide I am going to use words I say you shouldn't. Do
as I say, not as I do. I address one problem at a time so as not to confuse people, so yes,
some of my examples will have several mistakes in them even if I only address one of
those mistakes.

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Words To Watch For
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Now, I say "words to watch for" because not all of these words are forbidden.  People
see them on a list of "words to avoid" and think "I guess I can't ever use them..." But
that isn't necessarily true.  Some of them you should avoid using as often as possible,
and others, you should just cut back on. Sometimes, these words we are told to
"avoid"  aren't bad at all.

A really easy way to find these words in your writing is to open your story into a
program (like Microsoft Word) that allows you to replace and highlight text. Simply
search for the offending words and tell your program to replace them with a highlighted
version so they're easy to spot.  Don't panic if 80% of your page suddenly glows with
highlights.

"of course" - Don't use it. No really, don't. Why? Because generally when you use "of
course" it's because you're using it in place of saying "duh". Example: "Of course, that
was a bad idea." That whole sentence is like shouting "DUH!"  another example would
be: "But of course, Sarah hadn't known what was coming." Which unfortunately, breaks
fourth-wall, and is the equivalent of saying "duh, she should have known..."
Fourth wall: the imaginary wall between your audience and the narrator.. breaking
fourth wall is like turning directly to your audience and addressing them.. and you
generally want to avoid it at all costs.

"ly" - Why do you look for ly? Because sometimes (not always) -ly on the end of a
word tells you that it's one of those dreaded -ly adverbs.  -ly adverbs are used to modify
another word, and are the lazy-man's descriptive device.  Example: "She walked
quickly".  Any time you see one of these do this exercise:  "to (insert -ly adverb and the
word it modifies here) is to: ?"  for instance:  "to walk quickly is to:?" think up an
answer for that question and use it instead.  BEWARE: not all -ly adverbs are bad, and
all words ending with -ly are not necessarily -ly adverbs. If the above exercise can't be
used, it probably isn't a problem.

"ize" "tion" "sion" "ment" "ance" - Why to look out for these: words with these
endings can usually be replaced by something stronger.  They tend to make your writing
seem weak.  Example:  "She came to the realization that she was no longer human."
could be turned into:  "She realized that she was no longer human."  These are usually
easy to fix.  Keep in mind though that there are some exceptions.  Some words (like
lotion) adapted their endings from their root language (like latin) and there is no other
way for you to say "lotion". Especially look out for words with these endings when they
are placed between "the" and "of", it's a big no-no.

"is" "are" "was" "were" "be" "been" "being" - Be careful with sentences that
contain these words, they COULD denote that your sentence is passive.  (This is not
always the case however).  If you find one of these words in your sentence, check to
make sure your sentence structure is active:  Who/Does/What instead of What/Was
Done/To Whom.  You are not going to run into a passive sentence every time you find
one of these words, but every passive sentence has them. Be especially wary of these
words when they are followed by a word ending in -ed.

AMENDMENT: Clearly while writing this guide about words to watch out for/avoid, I
did not bother to get into why passive sentences are bad (and was chastised for it) So
let me clear this up.   PASSIVE SENTENCES ARE NOT BAD. They are actually a
very useful tool if you know how to use them correctly; however, passive sentences have
a tendency to be difficult to understand as they are often wordy.  There is a place and
time to use them, but in narrative writing in particular, it is usually recommended that
you avoid them if you can.  The general rule that I go by is: If the passive sentence does
not serve to avoid placing blame, fix story flow/pacing, or to avoid giving away a
clue   - then consider replacing it.

"make" "made" "involve" "involved" "provide" "provided" - Weak words. They

aren't horrific, but if you can avoid using them, your writing will sound better.
"that" "just" "really" "very" "quite" "sort of" - Filler words. You can almost
always avoid these, and they really don't add much to your writing.  "That was just
really evil, I am very disappointed, and quite appalled that you sort of cheated." How
awful.  Note: You cannot always avoid "that" sometimes it is needed to clarify. "That
was awful." but for the others, they never need to be used.

"walk" "look" - These are very undescriptive words.  There are a million other things
you could do that aren't "walking" or "looking" - you could "shuffle" or
"glance".  Avoid these whenever possible (which should be always).

"saw" "heard" "thought" - Anytime you see these, you can probably replace
them.  They denote "telling" in your writing instead of "showing"  Instead of saying
"Katie thought Broderick was an idiot." why not say: "He is such an idiot."? as an actual
thought. Instead of "She saw a bird fly overhead." why not: "A bird flew overhead."?
Instead of "She heard a cat hiss." why not: "A cat hissed somewhere nearby."?

"seem/seemed" - Sometimes you have to use this - I won't lie. BUT, usually, you don't.
Anytime you run across "seem" in your writing, say this to yourself: "____ cant SEEM
______, it either is, or isnt - does, or doesn't." if that doesn't make sense, then you can
use it.  Example:  "The horse seemed to change colors." "A horse cant SEEM to change
colors, it either changes colors, or doesn't." "The horse changed in color." would be
correct.

"you" - You should -almost- never use "you" in narrative UNLESS it's in dialogue, or
there is no other way to say the sentence.  Example :  "You walk down a hallway."
would be very very bad - get out of 2nd person POV please, we beg of you. On the
other hand, "Broderick, you are such a jerk." Katie yelled., would be appropriate. (I'm
sorry Broderick.... Katie is so mean to you D:)

"ing" - Watch for actions that end with -ing.  Now, these aren't bad, but you should
avoid using too many of them. Using a lot of -ing action words makes your writing
sound weak. Example:  "Walking down the hall, Katie ran into a pygmy mummy. She
screamed, and began running away." There are several mistakes in that, but you get the
idea.  This is BAD. (I'm sorry Katie.. I'd run from a pygmy mummy too.)  You can't
avoid using -ing action words all the time, it's impossible, but every once in awhile see
if you can replace a few of them by rewording your sentence in another way.  Also be
aware that -ing action words generally mean that the action is happening NOW or
"WHILE" something else is happening... you may want to be careful with how you use
them.

"began to" "begins to""started to""started" "starts" - You get the idea.  You can't
always avoid these ("The car started.") But when you do use them, make sure you aren't
using them to describe what someone is doing "She began to run." .. yah.. well then
what happened? Did she stop running? Did she continue to run?  It's better to just say
"She ran."  Generally, unless you're about to get interrupted in the next sentence, you
don't "start to" or "begin to" anything.  You just do it.

"instantly" "suddenly" - Avoid using these at all costs.  Why? Look at

this:  "Instantly, the house was on fire." "Suddenly, the pygmy mummy ran after Katie."
(I'm sorry Katie).  The impression these words give is very comical: "INSTANTLY!
The house was on fire! OMG!"  "SUDDENLY! Gasp! The pygmy mummy ran after
Katie! Oh noes!" Yah... you get the point. Find another way to say that something
happened "all of the sudden" or "in an instant".

"briefly" There's nothing wrong with briefly, except that it's lazy.  It is the easiest way
to say that there was a short pause of some type, or that someone did something in a
short amount of time.  You can use it, but see if there's another way to indicate a pause
without having to resort to this laziness.

"as" - This is one I abuse often.  "as" does not mean:  "while" or "when", so don't use it
in place of them.  Example: "As she walked, Katie..." While she walked, Katie...". This
doesn't mean you should cut out "as" every time you see it - there are legitimate reasons
to use "as".  like: "as if" or "as a" when comparing things is appropriate. Just be aware
of it in your writing, and make sure you're using it for the right reasons.

"like" - Like is generally a fairly weak word "She liked Broderick." isn't nearly as
descriptive as "She cared for Broderick." But, "like" does have appropriate uses, such as
when you are comparing two objects: "She ran like a gazelle." Ignore the fact that the
sentence sucks. Just be aware of how you are using it, and if possible, replace it with
something more descriptive.

"good" "bad" "nice" - More lazy words.  They just aren't descriptive.  When you run
into these words ask yourself this question:  "how good is it?" "it was EXCELLENT"
Oh look, we found something to replace it with.

"went" "came" "got" "get" - More lazy words. There's almost always (99.%) a way
you can replace these with something more descriptive.  "She went to the store." "She
drove to the store."

"then" - I saw this on a word list this morning, and I have mixed feelings about "then".
I will give you this caution: Don't start sentences with "then". Example: "Then, she ran
away." You can almost always drop it. "She ran away." It is useful in some situations,
however. Such as:  "She walked to her car, and then dug her keys out of her pocket."
You can still avoid using it, even in this example by adding some more narrative, but it
is still a valid use.

"moreover" - Don't use it. Ever. I know there are guides out there cautioning you never
to start a sentence with "but", and you shouldn't, it's true. However, "moreover" is a
very stuffy word, and isn't commonly used - if you wouldn't say it in real life, don't
write it.

"however" - I read somewhere this morning that you shouldn't use "however", I've also
seen guides that say you should use it in place of "but" since you shouldn't ever start
sentences with "but". I don't know who's right, or who's wrong, but I can offer you this
as my personal opinion:  I use however.  I say it in real life, so I write with it.. In my
opinion, it is acceptable to use "however", as long as you don't -overuse it-.  If you have
a sentence that starts with "But," and you seem to be using "however" a lot.. consider
incorporating your "But," sentence into the previous sentence. ", but she didn't..." OR,
use a comma & "though" to replace it:  

"She didn't like dogs. However, she found herself smiling at this one."
"Though she didn't like dogs, she found herself smiling at this one."

Obviously, it -is- avoidable, but I still hold my position that it isn't a bad word.

"alot" "alright" - These aren't actually words. What you mean is "a lot" and "all
right". TWO WORDS We English-speakers are lazy slang users.

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I will restate this again, because I promise you, it will be forgotten:  AVOID DOES
NOT MEAN "YOU CAN NEVER USE THIS!" It means be aware of when you are
using it, and make sure you're using it in a correct way. Don't let people tell you "you
should never use this word: ______"  Maybe you shouldn't use it, but that doesn't mean
you can't use it..