How do we manage when we communicate?

The reality is that spontaneous speaking is actually more common than planned speaking. To be an
effective communicator, regardless of whether it's planned or spontaneous, you have to worry about
your anxiety. So we'll start from there. Speaking in public can cause some people to feel nervous. The
ways to overcome this are:

1. Greet/Acknowledge Anxiety. Acknowledge you in advance to anticipate uncontrollable anxiety.

2. Reframe the way you see the situation: See the presentation as a conversation, not a show!
Performance has rules of right and wrong, but conversation is more natural. There is no "one right way"
to communicate.

• with questions. Dialogical (Two-Way) Questions. They keep the audience engaged, as if in a
conversation.

• Use conversational language. Much of their self-telling is from conversation with the words they use.

• Present oriented: Focus on the present, not future consequences. Don't anticipate what to say. Love
the twist tongue.

How to Feel Comfortable Talking in Spontaneous Situations — A Step-by-Step Guide

Step 1: Get out of our own way.

• We want to be perfect when we speak spontaneously.

• Our brains tend to "hoard up" what to say/what to do before that moment, and act in patterns. It is
deeply connected to us as memory.

• Train yourself to respond, not react. Responding is authentic, reacting is pre-empting/muscle memory.

• Dare to be blunt by responding, not reacting.

Step 2: View the talk/presentation/communication as an opportunity, not a threat.

• Most people view communication as hostile. "I fought them".

• Turn your perspective into an opportunity, not a threat.

• Spontaneous speaking situations are situations that give you a chance and have fun.

• Better mentality/approach to take: “Yes, and” than “No, but”

Step 3: Slow down and plank.

• Understand the demanding requirements you face in order to respond appropriately.

• Your basic job as a communicator is to serve an audience. Understand their needs by listening.

• You have to focus and listen (Really understand what people are trying to say).
• listen, then respond.

Step 4: Respond by telling a story.

• Never lose your audience! Keep your audience on track with structure.

• All stories have structure. Storytelling helps structure your responses.

• Structure increases the effectiveness of the way we process information.

• Useful structure 1: Problem/Opportunity → Solution → Benefits

• Useful structure 2: What? → So what? (Why is it important) → Now what? (The next step)

• In spontaneous speaking sessions, you must quickly figure out what to say and how to say it. Structure
helps you know how to say something.

• Your structure.

What are the communication questions from the audience? (Question and answer)
• How do you deal with hostile communication situations?

• You shouldn't be surprised. Before you even speak or enter the room, what the environment will look
like.

• First, acknowledge the emotions and ideas. Don't mention emotion (so as not to cause
conflict/misunderstanding), just admit it.

• Next, reframe and respond in a way that makes sense (explain).

• How do you communicate or do presentations remotely?

• try to include various interaction techniques in which the audience must participate.

• Examples: Polling questions, collaborative documents (Google Docs, Wikis, etc.), or inviting
imaginations.

• How do you buy time to think before answering a question?

• Paraphrase the question.

• Paraphrasing is a Swiss army communication. This gives you time to reframe and confirm the answer,
making sure you get it right.

• Humor is a great tool for connection) but very, very risky.

• What if people find it inappropriate? Or not funny?

• Self-deprecating humor is your best bet.

• How do you prevent yourself from sounding stupid?

• Ask “Why did you say that?”, or “How do you feel about that?”
• Ask them for advice. Advice changes the person's relationship with the questioner.

Keywords
Be aware of Cultural Differences and know your audience and their cultural expectations.