Interview Preparation

Verbal & Non Verbal

Communication
innovation

eBook05
 Table of contents

Chapter Topic Page

No. No.
1 Verbal Communication
1.1 Introduction
1-8
1.2 Types of verbal communication
1.3 FAM model of communication
2 7C’s of Communication 9-13
3 Non-Verbal Communication
3.1 Meaning of Non-Verbal
Communication
3.2 Role of Non-verbal
Communication
3.3 Basic tips to improve Body 14-36
Language
3.4 Effective Body Language in an
Interview
3.5 Effective Body Language in a Group
Discussion
4 Personality Development
4.1 Steps to develop personality 37-40
4.2 Tips on Social Skills
Chapter 1: Verbal Communication

1.1 Introduction
The word ‘verbal’ comes from the Latin word for word –
verbum. Meanwhile, the word communication comes
from the Latin word for to share – communicare. So, it
follows from this that verbal communication means
sharing things by means of words. What is shared here
can vary: it might be information, feelings, thoughts,
support and memories.
The sharing of information between individuals is carried
out by using speech. Individuals working within a
business need to effectively use verbal communication
that employs readily understood spoken words, as well
as ensuring that the enunciation, stress and tone of
voice with which the words are expressed is appropriate.

Sometimes verbal
communication is
contrasted with
written
communication.
However, strictly
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speaking, both types of communication use words and
thus both are verbal.
1.2 Types of verbal communication
1. Speaking face to face: here, our words are
combined with our gestures, facial expressions and
tone of voice to give a full communication
package.
2. Speaking on the phone: communicating verbally on
the phone is an excellent way to reach people far
away.
3. Video-chat services: the wonders of the internet
have enabled us to communicate verbally with
people everywhere and to stay in touch with our
loved ones across the globe.
4. Writing an email: Email writing is an imperative
part of our social and professional life. Hence good
communication is important.
5. Giving a lecture/ presentations: this is a key
example of the utility of verbal communication in
an academic context, during presentations and
client meetings etc.

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 6. Leaving a voice mail: sometimes, we can record
our verbal communications with our friends, family
and colleagues to pick up later.

Examples of verbal communication

To make things clearer, here are some examples of
situations in which people communicate verbally.
1. Introductions: Two people smile at each other at a
party. They want to get to know each other, so they
start chatting. This is an example of informal
verbal communication, though no doubt both
people will try to be polite to each other.
2. Someone is going to be late for work, so they
phone their boss to let them know. Here, verbal
communication is likely to be relatively formal and
polite – and it may well be apologetic as well.
3. Someone is having a hard time in their life, so they
call round to a friend’s house to talk it through face
to face. Here, emotions are being shared by means
of verbal communication. People often prefer to
talk face to face with this kind of verbal
communication rather than over the phone
because there is something warm and comforting

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 about being in the caring presence of another
human being.
4. A teacher interacts with children in their class,
explaining topics in various different ways until
everyone understands. This is another example in
which verbal communication has a key goal –
educating people.
5. Someone purchases a new product and does not
know how to use it, so they call the customer
support line for some verbal advice. Information is
being asked for and given in this scenario –
hopefully at least.
6. A group of colleagues meet in a boardroom to
share information about their company’s finances.
This is another example of formal verbal
communication, where information is shared in a
formalized context.
7. Someone spots a thief breaking into nearby shops
and calls the police with the time and location of
the crime. Here, verbal communication needs to be
concise, accurate and informative.
8. Two people getting married recite their vows to
each other as part of the ceremony. This is a very
interesting example of verbal communication as it
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 demonstrates the power of verbal communication
to make things happen.
Here, the couple’s words play a powerful part in actually
making them into a married couple in the eyes of the law.

Conclusion
Need of Verbal Communication:
1. Verbal communication- both oral and written is
used during Face to face interviews/ Telephonic/
skype etc.
2. It is used to be an effective and persuasive spear
during Group Discussions.
3. It is used during resume writing and essay writing
which may be asked during the screening process.
1.3 FAM Model of Communication
F- Fluency
A- Articulation
M- Modulation
Fluency:

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Oral fluency is a measure of how well and how easily you
can communicate your ideas clearly and accurately in
speech.
Fluency is your ability to speak continuously without
unwanted pauses.
A. Of course, the correct pronunciation of individual
sounds and words is very important for fluency, for
your listener, has to be able to hear and distinguish
the words you are saying. However, stress, rhythm,
and intonation can be even more important, for
they help make both single words and
combinations of words, like phrases, clauses, and
whole sentences, understandable to your listener.
B. Grammar is the structure of the language and
vocabulary holds the individual building blocks, so
both are also essential to fluency.
C. In conversation, you also have to be able to
understand what the other person is saying, so
good listening skills are also needed in oral
fluency.
D. Combining listening and reading with oral skills is a
great way to improve your fluency.
Tips to Improve Fluency:

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  Read a newspaper or magazine article and then
talk about it with friends.
 Watch a TV show or a movie or watch or listen to
the news, and talk about it.
 Writing about a topic first is a useful way to get
ready for talking or for discussion.
 Daily Practice
 All these things are important in building oral
fluency, but none are as important as taking the
time to practice speaking. Practice and sharpen
your oral fluency skills every day.
 Record Your Voice On-line with Voice Recorder.
 You can record your speech and listen to yourself
to analyse how well you are doing and what you
need to work on to improve your oral fluency.
 You can practice reading out loud or practice
fluency by speaking about various subjects, or
telling a story, and recording yourself and listening
to how well you did. You can also save your
recordings to your computer.
Articulation:
It is the ability to speak clearly with correct
pronunciations
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Tips to Improve Articulation:
Speak slowly: Slowing down will ensure that you both
pronounce words fully and stop words and sounds from
running together. This is the key to good articulation.
Most people that are difficult to understand are that way
because they speak too quickly. Sometimes it’s due to
excitement, other times due to nervousness. What
happens here is that words and sounds end up running
together causing a challenge for the listener. They simply
hear too many sounds jumbled together and have a hard
time separating them.
Speak in a continuous tone: The best way to trap this is
by recording yourself. Listen carefully to the tone of your
voice throughout the recording. If you find that you do it,
just being conscious of it is usually enough to help you
stop. Practice recording yourself speaking three times a
day in a consistent tone and within a couple weeks, the
problem will go away.
Practice the tricky sounds: If you find that certain words,
phrases or sounds give you trouble then practice them.
There are lots of words like this that either come up in
speeches or conversations that can cause us to stumble.
All you need is a few two-minute blocks to practice the
word or sound each day. You can do it in the car, while
walking or whenever you have a few minutes to yourself
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– just try to do it at least four times per day for a week. In
these blocks, just practice saying the word clearly ten
times. After a while, you’ll automatically start saying it
correctly.

Modulation:
Modulation is the variation in the pitch to suit the
context. It helps to break the monotony in monotone
speech and helps in emphasising the key ideas.
It is Upwards modulation- raise your pitch.
It is downwards modulation- drop your pitch.
Tips to improve Modulation:
Power: In order to create power in your voice, you should
not speak from your mouth but from inside from the
abdomen, make it commanding by generating intensity in
your voice.
Volume: Maintain your volume according to the listener
decrease or increase (do not shout to increase it be
loud). Increasing your volume simply means being loud
and louder. The louder you are, the clearer and
commanding you sound.

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Emphasis: Put emphasis by putting some pressure or
focus on the key words or syllables in order to provide
contrast to your words and bring out their desired
meaning. It helps your voice sound clear and attractive.

Chapter 2: 7 C’s of Effective Communication

We communicate all day long; at home, at work, with our

next-door neighbour and at the sports club. We
communicate verbally, non-verbally and in writing.
Unfortunately, the message does not always come
across as intended. This can lead to miscommunication
and (small) misunderstanding or the wrong impression.
The 7 C’s of effective communication, also known as the
seven principles of communication are a useful way to
ensure good and business communication. The 7 C’s of
Effective Communication provide a useful checklist as a
result of which both written and verbal communication
pass off in a clear, plain, target group-oriented and well-
structured manner.

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 COMPLETENESS

CONCISENESS CONCRETENESS

CONSIDERATION COURTESY

CLARITY CORRECTNESS

1. Completeness:
The message must be complete and geared to the
receiver’s perception of the world. The message must be
based on facts and a complex message needs additional
information and/ or explanation.
2. Concreteness:
Concrete communication is also about a clear message.
This is often supported by a factual material such as
research data and figures. The words used as well as the
sentence structure can be interpreted uni-vocally.
Nothing is left to the imagination.

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3. Courtesy:
In addition to considering the feelings and points of view
of the target group, it is also important to approach the
audience in a friendly and courteous manner. Use of
terms that show respect for the receiver contributes
towards effective communication. The same goes for the
manner in which you address someone. Not everyone
will be charmed if you use a familiar form of address and
use of a formal address could come across as too
distant. By using the word ‘they,’ a larger audience is
immediately addressed.
4. Correctness:
Correct use of language has the preference. In written
communication, grammatical errors must be avoided.
Wrong use of verbs is not acceptable even in verbal
communication. Correct use of language increases
trustworthiness and the receivers feel that they are being
taken seriously.
5. Clarity:
Clear or plain language is characterized by explicitness,
short sentences and concrete words. Fuzzy language is
absolutely forbidden, as is formal language and cliché
expressions.

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6. Consideration:
Communicating with the target group (Consideration): In
order to communicate well, it is important to relate to the
target group and be involved. By taking the audience into
account, the message can be geared towards them.
Factors that play a role in this are professional
knowledge, level of education, age and interests.
7. Conciseness:
A message is clear when the storyline is consistent and
when this does not contain any inconsistencies. When
facts are mentioned, it is important that there is
consistent, supporting information. Systematically
implementing a certain statement or notation also
contributes to clear business communication. When
statements are varied, they will confuse the receiver.

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The two additional C’s of communication are:
1. Creativity:
The text will only be lively when the words and sentence
structures are used creatively and when short sentences
are alternated with longer sentences.
2. Credibility:
By creating an atmosphere of trust in a conversation or
text, you add credibility to the message. This can be
achieved by a clear and striking ‘tone’, which indicates
that the information you are discussing contains the
right information.

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Chapter 3: Non-Verbal Communication

“The most important thing in communication is hearing

what isn’t said.” – Peter F. Drucker
3.1 Meaning of Non-Verbal Communication
This kind of communication includes behaviour and
elements of speech aside from the words themselves
that transmit meaning. Non-verbal communication
includes pitch, speed, tone and volume of voice, gestures
and facial expressions, body posture, stance, and
proximity to the listener, eye movements and contact,
and dress and appearance.
Research suggests that only 5 percent effect is produced
by the spoken word, 45 percent by the tone, inflexion, and
other elements of voice, and 50 percent by body
language, movements, eye contact, etc. In other words, it
is the transmission of messages by a medium other than
speech or writing.
There are many different types of non-verbal
communication. They include:
 Body Movements (Kinesics), for example, hand
gestures or nodding or shaking the head;
 Posture, or how you stand or sit, whether your arms
are crossed, and so on;
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  Eye Contact, where the amount of eye contact
often determines the level of trust and
trustworthiness;
 Para-language, or aspects of the voice apart from
speech, such as pitch, tone, and speed of speaking;
 Closeness or Personal Space (Proxemics), which
determines the level of intimacy;
 Facial Expressions, including smiling, frowning and
even blinking; and
 Physiological Changes, for example, sweating or
blinking more when nervous.
3.2 Role of Non-verbal Communication
1. Repetition: They can reinforce what is already being
said
2. Contradiction: They can contradict the message and
make the speaker seem untruthful
3. Substitution: They can take the place of words
4. Complementing: They can complement a verbal
message, for instance, a pat on the back
5. Accenting: They can underline a certain point in the
message
6. Giving signals to explain what they mean
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7. Conveying information about their emotional state.
8. Defining or reinforcing the relationship between
people.
9. Providing feedback to the other person.
10. Regulating the flow of communication
Let’s see in detail
1. Facial Expressions: Facial expressions are
responsible for a huge proportion of nonverbal
communication. The look on a person's face is
often the first thing we see, even before we hear
what they have to say.
While nonverbal communication and behaviour can
vary between cultures, the facial expressions of
happiness, sadness, anger, and fear are similar
throughout the world.
2. Gestures: Deliberate movements and signals are
an important way to communicate meaning
without words. Common gestures include waving,
pointing, and using fingers to indicate numeric
amounts. Also, gestures such as wait, go goodbye
etc. are universal.
3. Paralinguistic: Para linguistics refers to vocal
communication that is separate from actual
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 language. This includes factors such as tone of
voice, loudness, inflexion, and pitch. Consider the
powerful effect that tone of voice can have on the
meaning of a sentence. When said in a strong tone
of voice, listeners might interpret approval and
enthusiasm. The same words said in a hesitant
tone of voice might convey disapproval and a lack
of interest.
4. Proxemics: People often refer to their need for
"personal space," which is also an important type
of nonverbal communication. The amount of
distance we need and the amount of space we
perceive as belonging to us is influenced by a
number of factors including social norms, cultural
expectations, situational factors, personality
characteristics, and level of familiarity. For
example, the amount of personal space needed
when having a casual conversation with another
person usually varies between 18 inches to four
feet. On the other hand, the personal distance
needed when speaking to a crowd of people is
around 10 to 12 feet.
5. Posture: Posture and movement can also convey a
great deal of information. Posture such as arms

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 crossed etc. suggests closed mind and
unapproachable etc.
6. Eye Gaze: The eyes play an important role in
nonverbal communication and such things as
looking, staring and blinking are important
nonverbal behaviours. When people encounter
people or things that they like, the rate of blinking
increases and pupils dilate. Looking at another
person can indicate a range of emotions including
hostility, interest, and attraction.
People also utilize eye gaze a means to determine
if someone is being honest. Normal, steady eye
contact is often taken as a sign that a person is
telling the truth and is trustworthy. Shifty eyes and
an inability to maintain eye contact, on the other
hand, is frequently seen as an indicator that
someone is lying .
7. Haptics: Communicating through touch is another
important nonverbal behaviour. Touch can be used
to communicate affection, familiarity, sympathy,
and other emotions.

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Body Language interpretation
Aggressive: frowns, pursed lips, glaring, squinting,
clenching fists, red face, invading personal space,
shaking a finger, sudden movements
Attentive: holding still while listening, leaning forward,
gazing, ignoring distractions, nodding slowly,
paraphrasing what's been said
Bored: looking around, drumming fingers, yawning,
slouching, finding other things to do, looking at the clock
repeatedly
Deceptive: forced smiles (eyes aren't smiling when the
mouth is), sweating, sudden movements, twitching,
seems distracted, fidgeting
Defensive: covering vital organs, lowering chin, crossing
arms, using a physical barrier, making oneself small,
tensing up, glancing around, as if looking for an escape
Relaxed: steady breathing, lowered voice, arms hang to
sides, using hands when talking, smooth gestures,
smiling, even speed and pitch in speaking, little blinking,
unwrinkled forehead

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3.3 Basic tips to improve Body Language
There are certain body language symbols called Positive
& Negative symbols. Before learning the tips to improve
Body Language, let’s explore these symbols.
Positive body language symbols:

Body Language General Meaning

Open Palms Indicates honesty
Palms on Table (facing Assertiveness
down)
Slightly tilted head Inquisitiveness
Body bent forward Inquisitiveness
A uniform smile Genuine appreciation
Shoulder movements Generally positive
Hand on cheek Assessing a situation
Hand on forehead Deep thought / Melancholy
Straight body/brisk General agility
motion
Head down/slow Contemplation
motion/hands to the back
Steady eye contact Confidence

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24
Negative Body Language Symbols

Continuously changing Nervousness

positions
Crushing the teeth Hostility
Drooping body Lethargic
Standing akimbo Defiance
Palms over mouth Lying
Bending backwards Trying to avoid
A bent smile Ridicule
Hands folded Not receptive
Pointing fingers towards Aggressiveness
someone
Drumming fingers on the tableAssessing negatively
Avoiding eye contact Lying / Hiding something

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To be effective in your communication and to gain a
better understanding of people around you, you need to
focus on the following areas of body language:
1. Eye contact
2. Posture
3. Head position
4. Arms position
5. Legs position
6. The angle of the body
7. Hand gestures
8. Distance from others
9. Ears movements

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10. Mouth movements
Let’s go through some essential tips to work on the
above listed areas of body language:
1. Avoiding eye contact
When you avoid eye contact, you are communicating the
message that you lack confidence in yourself, are
uncomfortable or afraid, or want to escape.
2. Weak handshake
Shaking someone's hand is often one of the very first
impressions we have of another person. If your
handshake is weak or flaccid, you are sending the
message that you are, too.
Be firm in your handshake, but avoid the kind of death
grip that actually causes pain.
3. Sagging posture
When you slouch or slump, you are telling others that you
have poor self-esteem, which is definitely not the
message you want to convey in business.
Stand up straight, pull your shoulders back, and keep
your head up.

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4. Weak voice
While what you say is important, how you say it can have
an even greater impact on the other person in a
conversation. If your voice is weak, you may appear to be
weak, too.
Practice speaking in a way that is strong and confident.
You don't have to be overly loud, just loud enough to be
easily heard and understood.
5. Faked smile
Far worse than not smiling at all is faking a smile, which
will label you as being insincere at best, a fraud at worst.
Let your smile emerge naturally and don't force it.
6. Crossed arms or legs
When your arms or legs are tightly crossed, this indicates
to others that you are in a defensive frame of mind--
either you are afraid of the other person or closed to
what that individual has to say.
Preferably do not sit cross-legged, as it may increase the
chance of shaking one leg.
7. Grimacing/Eye rolling
When you grimace or roll your eyes during your
conversations, you are loudly telling the other person

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that you either don't believe what he or she is saying or
that you don't respect him or her.
Instead of grimacing or rolling your eyes, practice smiling
and nodding your head in agreement.
8. Playing with your Smartphone
Nothing says that you'd rather be somewhere else louder
than texting or otherwise playing with your Smartphone
while you're in a conversation with someone else.
Make a point of putting away your electronic gadgets
and direct your full focus on the other person.
10. Blinking
When you increase your rate of blinking during the
course of a conversation, you are saying to others that
you are nervous or anxious.
Be aware of the blinking of your eyes, and make a
conscious effort to slow it down when you communicate
with others.
11. Fidgeting/checking your watch or fingernails
When people constantly fidget, tap their feet or fingers, or
check their watch, they are sending the signal that they
are bored and want to be doing something—anything
else.

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Be aware of when you start fidgeting or checking your
watch or fingernails during your conversations, and put a
stop to it as soon as it starts.
3.4 Effective Body Language in an Interview
“First Impression is the Last Impression”
It takes less than 30 seconds to form a first impression.
So, in the interviews even before you have said anything,
the panellists have formed some opinion about you.
Let’s understand some basic tips to create a positive
impression through effective body language:
Before the Interview:
1. Wait patiently: Others are looking at you. Do not talk in
loud volume. Speak gently to others sitting next to you.
Keep a calm and confident demeanour.
2. Relax: Take a deep breath, hold it for a second or two,
and let it out. Focus on slowing down your speech and
body movements a bit. This will make you appear more
confident and contemplative. It will also help calm you
down if you are nervous.
3. While Entering: Knock the door if required, seek
permission and enter the room. Ensure to close the door
behind you gently. Do not bang the door.

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During the Interview:
4. Walk: The way you enter the room should display
energy and confidence. Do not slouch and walk. Do not
look down while walking. Do not fold your hands and
walk. Hold your file/ documents properly while walking.
Smile as you see the panellists.
5. Posture: Keep a relaxed posture whether you are
sitting or standing. Keep your back straight but not stiff
and let those shoulders relax.
6. Handshake: The handshake is one of the most
important nonverbal communication cues because it can
set the mood for the entire conversation. A firm
handshake will give you instant credibility while a weak
handshake will make you appear fragile.
If the panellist offers a handshake, respond with a firm
handshake. Wait for the panellists to offer the handshake
first.
7. Make eye contact: This is the best way to show you’re
actually paying attention and to the panellist and a sign
of attentive listener. Don’t stare continuously at the
interviewer, but strive to hold eye contact for a few
seconds at a time.
Note: If you’re faced with more than one interviewer, be
sure to make eye contact with all of them. Address the
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person who asked the question a little longer, then hold
eye contact with the other interviewer for a few seconds,
before returning your attention to the first interviewer.
8. Hands: Do not rest your elbows on the table. Place
your palm on your lap. Try not to clench your fists or
wave your hands around to make a point; this includes
tapping your fingertips in it will make you seem nervous
and unpredictable. And please don’t bite your nails. You’ll
look nervous and it’s really distracting! Do not keep your
hands on your face or don’t distract by frequently moving
it in your hair or ear.
9. Arms: Crossing your arms is the visual clue that you
are turned-off by what is going on around you. Practice
hanging your arms comfortably at your side while
standing or bringing your hands together in your lap to
show others that you are open to what they are
communicating when you are sitting.
10. Legs: Keep both feet planted firmly on the floor. It’ll
help to keep your posture straight and focus on your
interviewer, which in turn will make you seem more
focused.
11. Smile: Smile and nod where appropriate. Don’t put up
a serious face when not required. Also, don’t laugh
unnecessarily.

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It goes without saying that you should listen attentively
and try not to interrupt. Focus on keeping your tone of
voice even and polite. Too soft and you’ll seem timid, too
loud and you’ll seem domineering.
12. Affirmative movements: You can show empathy with
simple actions of agreement like nodding your head or
smiling. These actions let people know that you
understand them.
All your personal gestures should be open and
expressive. Keep your shoulders relaxed and facing the
interviewer to ensure they’re always involved in what
you’re saying.
13. Voice: Finally, the words that you choose, your voice,
tone and pitch also play a major role in coming across as
confident individual. Use your voice carefully. Do not
speak too fast nor too slow. Try matching your pace with
the interviewers.
Sometimes mirroring the pace of your speech with the
panellist could be beneficial to connect. Do not be too
aggressive nor submissive while speaking. Use assertive
tone.
After the Interview:
14. Be graceful: Display the same positive and confident
body Language you used while entering the room. Ensure
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while pulling back the chair or getting up do not make
noise.
Most importantly, be respectful and keep a professional
personal distance at all times.
15. Goodbye Smile: Smile while exiting. A graceful
goodbye is just as important as a classy hello.
16. Exit: While exiting the door thank the panellists and
open the door carefully and ensure you close it back
without making noise or banging the door loudly.
Conclusion:
In general, body language is controlled by our
subconscious mind and is not always in accordance with
what we are saying. Interviewers will be able to pick up
on the differences between what you are saying with
your words and what your body is saying. To make sure
you are conveying your thoughts and opinions how you
want, practice your body language so that your
movements match your words.
Your aim is to always keep the focus on the
conversation, so keep your expression interested, your
posture confident and your head high from the moment
you arrive in the lobby until the second you’re a safe
distance away.

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3.5 Effective Body Language in a Group Discussion
Let’s explore the essential tips and tricks that will help
you portray the ideal body language while sitting in a
Group Discussion.
Need for Effective Body Language in a GD
 It reflects an overall balance in your personality.
Candidates are supposed to be composed and
poised even under high levels of stress.
 It assumes even more importance in group
discussions and all other interpersonal
communication where you are required to maintain
multiple connections.
The Right Place to Sit
1. The seat which you occupy in the GD may also
influence your participation levels.
 The moderator asks you to take a specific seat as
per a definite sitting arrangement.
 You are given the flexibility to sit anywhere, in
which case you may leverage the above-mentioned
advantages.
2. In case of the second possibility, we suggest you
prioritize the following seats:-

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  The central seat: Someone occupying the central
seat in an arched configuration, is probable to
experience an extra ounce of psychological power
due to a symmetrically enhanced seat.
 The ones at the two extremes: Someone occupying
the corner seat may also feel this kind of an
advantage, as the corner seat defines the starting
or ending of the group, leaving the candidate with a
realization that he/she is at a critical position.
Correct Body Posture:
 Maintain an upright posture demonstrating
adequate levels of energy. This should not,
however, make you too rigid and uptight.
 Many candidates feel clueless with respect to the
position of the hands. Keep your hands on your
thighs, particularly in the non-active mode and
gesticulate appropriately.
 Too much gesticulation may project you as an
impulsive person and lack of it may make you
uncomfortable while expressing yourself.
 You may keep the legs at right angles to the plane
of the body or fold them in a formal manner.
Preferably keep both your feet firmly on the ground
to avoid shaking legs.
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  Keep a pleasant expression on the face, as it
shows a good stress management ability. Further,
no one will connect with you if you support a frown
on the forehead.
 Demonstrate involvement and interest through
non-verbal gestures. You cannot be speaking all
through, but you still need to participate. These
gestures will support your participation. So, do not
withdraw from the group. Lean slightly forward and
look interested in what others are speaking.
The Eye Contact
 There are two dimensions to the eye contact
challenge: where and how?
 Keep the Pareto rule in mind while handling the
‘where’ challenge. As per this rule, you may slit
your eye contact as per the 80-20 split, where 80%
of the time you look at the active participants and
the balance 20% you look at the inactive or the less
active ones. This will ensure that nobody is left out.
 The ‘how’ part is very situational and depends on
the message you want to convey. For example, you
may look at someone with complete conviction
and convergence, persuading that someone to
react to your point of view.
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Tip:- Sometimes when someone intersects or interrupts
while you are still making your point, in such cases take
your eye contact away from such person. This may help
you to complete your point.

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 Chapter 4: Personality Development

Introduction
How do you define Personality? The complex of all the
attributes--behavioural, temperamental, emotional and
mental- that characterise a unique individual. Personality
refers to the emotions, thoughts, and behaviour patterns
unique to an individual.
Five Important points for a favourable Personality
1. Neat Appearance
2. Intelligence and Smart
3. Good communication skills
4. Trustworthy
5. High integrity & Responsible.
Aspects of a weak personality
1. Unhygienic
2. Hurting attitude
3. Useless approach
4. Non-beneficial communication.
5. Untrustworthy, Irresponsible, Lack of integrity.

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4.1 Steps to develop personality
Personality Development depends on:
Step 1: Self-awareness
Step 2: Clarity of personal and professional goals.
Step 3: Sincere efforts to learn the necessary skills and
remove weaknesses.
Step 4: Character and conduct
Step 5: Self-Confidence, Will-Power and Self-Discipline
Step 6: Positive thinking & Good moral values
Step 7: Duty, responsibility and accountability
Step 8: Acceptance of others feedback.
4.2 Tips on Social Skills
Basic Tips to Remember
Good Manners begin with a good sense of self. You are
unique. Don't try to shape your personality to meet
circumstances.
Thanking others is a way of praising them
 Send thank-you notes whenever someone does
something nice for you,
 Telephone to express your gratitude.

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Your voice, your behaviour and even your clothing should
reflect understated elegance.
 Let your deeds speak for themselves.
Listening to others is a way to show respect.
 Be genuinely interested in others; learn their
names, and encourage them to talk about
themselves.
 Never interrupt.
 Look them in the eye, and listen carefully. The
listener learns and thereby gains.
Before speaking to others, consider what effect your
words will have.
 Pause and weigh your words carefully and say
them with a quality of softness.
If you hear gossip, don't join in, be indifferent to it.
 If you disagree with others, do so respectfully.
 Don't verbally attack or condemn them.
 You may win the argument but lose a valued friend.
If you make an appointment, arrive on time.
 If you must be late, call first.

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  Never arrive early for social engagements; your
host may still be getting dressed!
 Don't overstay your welcome.
Never demean anyone with rude jokes or an unwelcome
nickname.
 Be considerate.
 It's always good manners to think of others first.
Be a calming, happy influence in any stressful situation
and maintain your composure.
 See humour whenever possible.
Master self-control and have empathy for others.
 Always act your best with courtesy and politeness

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