How to divorce without hurting your kids

According to a survey, about 1 in 5 marriages end by the 5th anniversary only in the US. It is
a difficult experience for anyone. In this article, we will discuss some tips on how to divorce
without hurting your kids.

Divorce brings a major change in the lives of children and parents. After years of struggling,
divorce may be a relief to you. But most of the time, it is a nightmare for your family and
children. The end of your marriage typically unleashes a flood of emotions including fear,
anger, grief, anxiety and depression.

Sometimes their emotions can arise when you are trying to ease the tension. Such a
response from your kids in this situation is normal. The first thing that you should do is to
make sure that your kids are involved in the process. It's important for them to feel like
they're being listened to, even though they're still young and might not be able to speak up
about their opinion. Try not to argue in front of them - this will only make the situation more
difficult for everyone involved.

Let’s discuss some crucial points on how can you get a divorce without hurting your kids-

What to say to your kids?

For kids to get through a divorce, the parents need to provide them with love and support.
They should be told that it is not their fault and that it is normal to feel sad and angry.

One of the ways you can tell your children about your divorce is by explaining to them why
you and their other parents are getting divorced. You should try to do this early on so they
can process it better.

It doesn't mean that they won't get upset when they find out what has happened, but having
some understanding will help them deal with it better than if they don't know anything about
what's going on.

Parents should choose the right words to explain all the things perfectly and provide much
comfort to them. Kids aged more than 10 years old can understand what is going on in their
families. But the little ones are really sensitive to these kinds of situations. Well, the best
thing you can do is leave them out of it.

Normally, they may ask you many things. Don’t be irritated and try to answer all the
questions gently. Make them believe that sometimes people are happier apart. You and your
ex have to convince them together. Degrading each other in front of your children will only
hurt you.

Convince them it is not their fault

Sometimes, situations go beyond your control when you are going to divorce. You along with
your family go through difficult times. Divorce can hurt their personal feelings. Kids are
affected the most because of your divorce. Most of the time, they can say anything about the
situation. They remain silent and witness things they may never imagine.
So, it is one of the most important things to tell your kids that they do not have any fault in
your divorce. You and your ex have to convince them and make them realize that everything
is going to be normal in future.

Some kids think that they are the reason for their parent’s divorce. As a result, their emotions
burst out and they try to do unusual things. So, for you, it is important to take care of your
kids during this difficult time.

Addressing hopes for getting back together

Divorce is never easy on a family, especially when children are involved. The most important
thing for kids is to have both parents actively participating in their lives. In many cases, this
means that parents must learn how to adjust to new roles as single parents.

It is normal for the kids to express a hope that one day their parents will get back together
and their broken family will reunite. Parents need to be sure that they are there for their
children during this difficult time and address any hopes of getting back together with their
kids. Divorce needs to be open dialogue so that you know your child is understanding of the
situation. This will decrease the stress level of the children.

Encourage them to overcome the difficult time

Divorce is difficult for everyone, and it can be especially hard on children. They may feel like
they've lost a parent or both parents. They may also feel like the divorce means that they're
to blame. They may think that they are the ones who caused their family to fall apart.

The effects of divorce on kids may become a serious issue and the importance of hope for
them in this kind of difficult time is needed the most. Here are some tips on how you can
embrace and nurture your child's hopes for reconciliation:

1) Support your child's relationship with both parents

2) Be open about what happened during the divorce

3) Encourage your child to share their feelings

4) Encourage them not to take responsibility for the divorce

Conclusion
Misunderstanding in a relationship can result in divorce and it can be a devastating life event
for you as well as for your family. Especially your kids will suffer the most without the help of
both of their parents. But in this difficult time, you need to stay beside your kids and value
their feelings. After divorce, you and your ex have to take care of your kids and share
custody for their wellbeing.