CABASE, FLORY JOY V.

BSED-English
PSYCHOLOGY 101- TTH (3:30-5:00 PM)

UNDERSTADING THE SELF MODULE 1: THE SELF FROM VARIOUS PERSPECTIVES

UNIT 4: THE SELF ACCORDING TO PSYCHOLOGY (The Self as Cognitive Construct)

ACTIVITY III

This activity has two parts that try to compare how we look at ourselves against how people perceived
us depending on how we present ourselves to them. For the first part, list ten to fifteen (10-15) qualities
or things around the left circle representing you that you think defines who you are.

Quite/aloof
Reserved
Diligent
Procrastinator
Intelligent
Unconfident
Gloomy
Pessimistic
Thoughtful
Thoughtful
Trustworthy
Trustworthy
Talented
Flexible/adaptable
Goal-oriented
Empathetic
Self-reliant
Self-reliant
Serious
Boring
Creative
Inquisitive
Frugal
Average
Competitive

For the second part, go around and ask the people around you like family, your friends, or classmates to
write on the right circle things that they see you do or hear you say.

ANALYSIS

Compare what you wrote about your “self” to those written by other people. What aspects are similar
and which are not? What aspects are always true to you? What aspects are sometimes true or
circumstantial? What aspects do you think are not really part of your personality? Write your answers
below.

-The aspects that were similar are: quite/aloof/reserved, diligent, thoughtful, trustworthy, and self-
reliant. The aspects that were not similar are: average and intelligent, boring and creative,
procrastinator and diligent, and average and talented. The aspects that were always true to me are:
quite/aloof/reserved, thoughtful, trustworthy, self-reliant, competitive, empathetic, goal oriented
and, inquisitive. The aspects that are sometimes true or circumstantial are: gloomy, self-reliant,
 procrastinator, serious, frugal, and intelligent.

APPLICATION AND ASSESSMENT

Do a research and list (10) things to do in order to boost self-esteem of improve your self-concept. Cite
your source. Analyze which of those tips are more likely to backfire and make someone conceited or
narcissistic and revise them in order to make the statements both helpful to the individual as well as
society in general.

10 Tips to Boost Your Self-Confidence:

1. Shut down negative thoughts:
"It takes but one positive thought when given a chance to survive and thrive to overpower an entire
army of negative thoughts." Robert H. Schuller
It's about time you said goodbye to the negative voices in your head. Whenever you have a negative
thought about yourself, your job, or your career, you push yourself down a little bit more. You need to
stop listening to the negativity and start replacing those negative thoughts with positive ones.
Instead of saying you can't do this or that, tell yourself you can, and sooner or later, you'll start believing
it. Negativity only leads to negativity; it demotivates you to be your best or do any good. So next time
you get a negative thought, quickly replace it with a positive one. And then, when you have that positive
thought, turn it into action.
2. Surround yourself with positivity:
"Surround yourself with only people who are going to lift you higher." Oprah Winfrey
It's not just enough to have positive thoughts and implement them. The people around you and in your
life have a huge influence on your self-confidence. Surround yourself with people who push you up and
push you towards what you want in life, not people that make you feel bad about yourself.
Your environment, family, and friends can make all the difference in how you feel about yourself. They
are the main pillar in encouraging you to believe in yourself. So, it's time to clean your contacts list. Pull
out all the bad weeds that negatively take you down and make you feel bad.
3.  Learn how to say "NO":
"One of the hardest expressions of self-assertiveness is challenging limited beliefs.” Nathaniel Branden
You need to take control of your own life and decisions. Don't be bullied into doing something that'll
make you feel uncomfortable and go beyond your boundaries. Be assertive and don't be afraid to say no
when you need to.
You may think that you're being mean or don't want to upset someone. You might come up with a list of
excuses as to why you should say yes. But the truth is, saying yes to something you don’t want to do will
only hurt yourself and your confidence.
4. It's time for a makeover:
"We know grooming is important to people. To get their hair done, to get makeup and things like that -
that makes a person feel better." Kenneth Williams
In this point, we're going to put forward the opposite idea of "change happens from inside out." This
doesn't mean you have to get an actual makeover or dress in pricey clothes. But even the simplest
changes in our image can make us feel good about ourselves.
For example, try a new hairdo, get a haircut, shave this morning, or even wear that t-shirt you think you
look good in. Making little tweaks to your self-image will make you feel good on the inside too. So yes,
sometimes how you look on the outside matters.
5. Change how you see yourself:
"Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your
powers you cannot be successful or happy.” Norman Vincent Peale
We behave and feel according to our self-image. So if you feel like you're a loser at life, you'll walk with
your shoulders slumped and avoid eye contact. If you feel like you're not physically attractive, you'll
avoid looking in mirrors, and so on. Changing how you see yourself and working on your body language,
eye contact, and speech will make you more confident in yourself.
Identify the aspects of your image you don't like and see what you can do about them. Alternatively, you
can try focusing on the things you do like about your self-image and saying them out loud to yourself
until you believe it. Be confident in the way you carry yourself, even if you don't necessarily feel that
way just yet. Pull your shoulders back, stand tall, and talk slowly and clearly. How you act in front of
others will not only make them think you're confident but will boost your confidence.
6. Do something risky once a week:
"Do not fear mistakes. There are none." Miles Davis
You can't keep safe in your bubble forever. You need to put yourself out there - to get both rejected and
accepted. Taking risks doesn't necessarily mean going bungee jumping or mountain climbing. But take
yourself out of your comfort zone. Talk to that girl you've always had a crush on or get that tattoo you
were too hesitant to get, even if it leads to rejection.
You need to accustom yourself to rejection, whether it's from your crush, an investor, or a friend. The
fear of failing or being rejected will always be in the way, so you need to overcome it by training yourself
to accept rejection.
7. You are your meanest critic:
"I am a self-critical perfectionist." Victoria Pendleton
No one is judging your every step but yourself. Sometimes people's criticism can be harsh, but your
criticism of yourself is likely the hardest. You're not perfect; no one is. We all make mistakes. So instead
of beating yourself down for all your mistakes, start praising your strengths and good deeds instead.
Write down all your strengths and remind yourself of them each time you're going to criticize yourself
negatively. Stop being so hard on yourself or calling yourself a loser or a failure. Each time you do, it's
another blow to your confidence.
8. Set goals for yourself:
"All successful people have a goal. No one can get anywhere unless he knows where he wants to go and
what he wants to be or do. " Norman Vincent Peale
Setting and achieving goals is one way to feel accomplished and confident. Now, this doesn't mean your
goals should be anything huge like ending world hunger or saving koala bears. If you don't achieve any
goals, you'll feel discouraged. Start with small goals that you can easily achieve. For example, my goal is
to finish this article tonight. I also have a goal to go to the gym this weekend.
Achieving these small goals will make you feel good about yourself and reassure you to take the step to
set bigger and harder goals. All goals achieved matter, no matter how small.
That's why you should keep a list of all your accomplishments (not necessarily every single one but the
general ones that made you feel proud). Use this list as motivation to get you to achieve your bigger
goals.
9. Love yourself:
"You, as much as anyone in the entire universe deserves your love and affection." Buddha
How you feel about yourself is vital to how you treat yourself. Caring and nourishing your health,
appearance, and emotions is the perfect blend of loving yourself. When you love your body and look
after it, you'll be more confident in yourself.
Care for yourself by improving your sleeping habits, get more hours of sleep at night or exercise more,
even if it's just a walk. Consider picking up a sport to increase your energy and reduce stress. Eating
healthy meals and caring for your hygiene are also signs of caring and loving yourself.
Another trick to boosting your confidence is by being more knowledgeable. This is something you can do
for yourself by reading books or articles, researching, or studying. The more you know about a topic, the
more confidently you can speak about it! Nourishing yourself with love, knowledge, and care will make
you feel better about yourself and give you more confidence.
10. Be grateful and helpful:
"When I started counting my blessings, my whole life turned around." Willie Nelson
Doing good for others will make us feel good about ourselves. The smallest gestures, like a smile, can
make all the difference with someone. Try to always have an active role in volunteering or helping
charities during the holidays. Being able to make a difference with someone will satisfy you inside and
improve your self-image.
Seeing all the change that you can do and all those who need your help will make you more grateful for
the people and things in your life. Having an impact on someone else's life will give you a big dose of
confidence. You made that happen.

- The tip that is more likely to backfire and would make someone conceited or narcissistic
is the “Love yourself” tip. “Love Yourself” is the advice dished by many self-help books and easily
quoted on pretty Instagram pictures. It is a really good advice. However, it also has it cons. When
you love yourself too much, you tend to not care about other people’s impression of you—and
that is when they say it’s “attitude.” You also tend to lose many people in your life because you
don't allow anyone to talk against you. You are most likely to face problems with friends and
relatives because when you love yourself deeply, you don’t let yourself feel low.
To put it in the briefest manner, self love when done right is excellent for self-care, self-
awareness, and growth. Lack of it will ignite self-doubt, inferiority complex, self-image issues. Too
much of it may result in superiority complex, selfishness, self-centeredness. The right tip should
have been: “Love Yourself with boundaries or limitations.”

Source: https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/self-esteem/10-tips-to-boost-your-self-confidence/

JOURNAL #3

After doing this character/self-esteem assignment, I managed to learn a lot about myself that I
didn’t know was there. Most of those things are negative ones. After completing the negative/positive
part, I noticed that are my answers are very different than my friends’ answers. I noticed that when I
evaluated myself, I put more negative traits rather than positive ones, whereas my friends put more
positive traits than negative ones. I believe I tend to see the very negative traits about myself whereas
my friends tend to see more of the positive traits about me. This was definitely an eye opener because it
made me realize that I have a lot of things about myself to work on.
This unit made me realize that happiness and contentment come from within ourselves or in our
mindset. I can choose to love and care for myself and enjoy my own company. I can choose to have
more positive thoughts, to participate in activities I enjoy. I can choose to assert myself in a healthy way
with others – to say how I feel and what I need without becoming defensive or angry.
It doesn’t matter how I look or how old I am, or what has happened in my past. It doesn’t matter
how much education I have or how much money I earn or what my title is. These things do not give me
self-esteem, and do not have to control me for the rest of my life. I have as much worth as anyone else.
We all have different starting places, different obstacles to overcome. I am part of nature, part of God or
a Higher Power, part of this mysterious, miraculous universe, and by accepting all of me, the light and
the dark, and the same in others; I can come to find wholeness and peace within.