Module 4

THE SEXUAL SELF

*************************
*****
* ************************************************************************

** ******************************************

"I have beauty, intelligence, individuality, sensuality, and sexuality."

Shannnon Tweed
.

LEARNING OBJECTIVES
In this module, you will be able to:
explain the nature, concept and meaning of sexual self -concept;
identify behavior towards understanding of one's sexuality; and
demonstrate understanding and acceptance of one's sexual
self-concept.
 woman? What does it mean to be lesbian
What does it mean to be a man or
domain of sexuality
or gay? module, concepts that fall within the general
In this
are important concepts among
will be explored. Sex, gender and sexual orientations
of
our younger generations. The way we think,
feel and act are shapes by the kind

orientation we have about our sexual self-concept. biological sex

How we understand

or act like the opposite sex.

How we
will reflect how we treat individuals who dress
value masculinity and feminity. How
act with man and woman will reflect how we
how relate to lesbians, gays, and
understand sexual orientation will influence
we
we

bisexuals
the meaning of sex, gender and sexual orientation, we
As we try to understand
adolescent
these concepts play a crucial role in Filipino
hope to gain awareness of how
in trying to understand their own
sexual self, and manage adjustment to their everyday

life.

SEXUAL SELF-CONCEPT DEFINED

evaluation of his or her own
Sexual self-concept is characterized as a person's
individual's evaluation of his or her
sexual feelings and actions. It is defined as an

own sexual feelings and actions.

conducted among 4,000 Filipino students
in 2009 by Jokin De Irala was
A study their views
from third year high third-year college, aimed at looking into
school to

on relationships, love and sexuality.

It was found in this study that the Filipino youth
from friends. However, they
obtained information about love and sexuality mainly
friends'. In exploratory analyses among university
valued parents' opinion more than
to be associated with frequency of contraceptive
students, sexual self-concept is found
et al., 2009). The sexual self-concept
use and use at most recent intercourse (de Irala,
consists of four main factors:
that affect sexual function or affect aspects
1. Information or event (external events
of sexuality)
2. Sexual esteem (cognitive, attitudes, sexual schemata)
and
3. Sexual affect/feelings (feelings about sexuality and function),
4. Sexual behaviour and function

SEX AND SEXUALITY IN ADOLESCENT

Duan and
Sex is a primary category of human socíal perception. (Stangor, Lynch,
female has been described as an automatic
Glass, 1992). Judging a person as a male or
social-cognitive process that is effortless, unintended, and involuntary.
At birth, each individual is classified by biological sex. Biological sex means

whether an individual is a girl ora boy. Generally speaking, a biologically prescribed

Understanding the Self 43

 d i f f e r e n t i a t e
males and
males
that
Sex Car
o *--************
characteristic

been
defined
as
sex.
be
females
has

defined using:
YX)
C h r o m o s o m e s
(XX o r
1.
2 . G o n a d s ( o v a r i e s / t e s t e s )

(estrogens or
hormones
Gonadal
3.
androgens/testosterone)

organs (tallopian
accessory
Internal
4. deferens/seminal
vas
uterus o r
tubes,

Gender symbolis a pictogram or glyph vesicles)

labia minora
used to represent either biological sex
or
5. External genitalia (clitoris,
sociological gender." or penis, scrotum)
orifice
vaginal
using these different biological
Individuals with mixed sexual configurations
2013).
criteria are known as intersexed or intersexual (Macapagal,
are continuous
change an
processes, which acquire
a
Growth and development
as early as in intrauterine
Individual, every moment. Development of sexuality begins
life following conception and continues through infancy, childhood, adolescence
adulthood till death. During infancy, there is no awareness of gender. The child
acknowledges its gender in early childhood as early as by three years. Self-awareness
about sexuality (gender role, gender identity) evolves during the childhood. Biological
research evidences are suggestive of the definite role of androgens in choosing
the gender sensitive roles and gender-specific behaviours. Adolescence
is a phase
of transition during which major
developments sexuality takes place. Puberty
of
is reached during adolescence, which is a
major landmark in of the'development
sexuality. The hypothalamo-pituitary-gonadal
axis function is
sexual development during highly essential for the
puberty (PMC, 2015).
According to US National Library of Medicine
divided into three stages: (2015), adolescence can be broadly
Early (10-13 years)
Middle (14-16 years), and
Late (17-19 years)
Physical changes begin in early
about their body image. During adolescence, where they are
adolescents develop adolescence, extremely concerneed
abstract thinking and cognitive development happens
sense of identity during late
adolescence; reasoning.
social Emotionally, happen
as sexual interest, thev build up
in early
develop
in
involvement,
this
phase. Different peer interaction, as as well
adolescence, risk taking in
middle behavioral We
to assess their risk taking.
own.
adolescence, and experimentation
later
ion is
is see
sec
adolescents
lescents learns
lea
44Understanding the Self
Sex, Gender, and Sexual Orientation
Holmes gave the a primer on Lesbian,
In 2015, the eminent psychologist Dr. Margie
that sex
Bisexual, Trans, Intersex, Queer (L.GBTIQ) issues and definitions, raising
Gay, &
of chromosomes, gonads, and hormones (Sayson
is about biological dimensions
Nisperos, 2015).
is psychosocial and cultural.
On the same primer, Dr. Holmes asserted that gender
views him herself and may or may not coincide with his or her
It describes how one or

Concepts in gender studies include gender identity, gender roles, and gender
anatomy.
stereotypes (Sayson
& Nisperos, 2015).
the other hand, refers to the intimate
While an individual's gender identity, on

individual's own gender. The roles people play

knowledge and experience of the
refer to societal norms
according to their identified gender, or simply gender roles,
or how gender is manifested
include
relating to perceived sex. Gender expressions
or heteronormative
heteronormative, transgender, and transsexual. In a gender-binary
transgenders and
paradigm where male and female are the only acceptable genders,
transsexuals are ostracized (Sayson & Nisperos, 2015).
Holmes cited cases of transgender denied entry in both male and female public
restrooms in nightclubs. According to Holmes, studies have shown that transphobia-

antagonism towards transsexuals and transgenders-is often worse than homophobia.

of sexual attraction the term has now come to
Seen previously as a simple matter
attraction is also
include actions and behavior in response to attraction. This sexual
commonly referred as sexual orientation.
Sexual orientation is an "enduring emotional, romantie, sexual or affectional
attraction to another person" (APA, 1998, p.1). Sexual orientation, as one of the aspect
within the broad umbrella of sexuality, is defined by the sex of the person to whom
one is sexually attracted to and has the potential of loving (Hyde, 1990). Following
gendered expectations of sexuality, males are expected to fall in love and be sexually
attracted to females and females are expected to fall in love and be sexually attracted
to male. (Howard and Hollander, 1997 as cited by Macapagal).
The following are emerging nature of sexual orientation
Heterosexual is an attraction and behavior towards the opposite sex,
Homosexual is an attraction to the same sex,
Bisexual is an attraction to both male and female.
Asexual is a person who do not have attraction towards any sex or gender.
Pansexual, on the other hand, have the ability to be attracted to anyone regardless
of sex.
Intersexed are people who fall outside the male and female dichotomy.
In a study conducted by. Fausto-Sterling (2000), for every 1,000 children born, 17
are intersexual in some form; that is 17 percent of the population, or roughly 2 in every

Understanding the Self * 45

 individual is the
male pseudo hermaphrodite
00 people. An example of intersexed look like norma

nas a defective androgen receptor. Male pseudo hermaphrodites With the

wO

flawless complexion,
added
breasts, long legs,
wOmen, with well-developed their
intersexuality 1S discovered. It
o r a man. When they fail to menstruate,
gnt fallopian tubes or
with no uterus,
1s soon discovered that their vagina ends blindly
or labia.
buried in the groin
upper vagina. Instead, a normal testes is
letter word needing four
that sex is "a three
Otimately, however, Holmes stressed
c e t e r Words to convey its true meaning-heal, give,
take, and love" (Rappler, 2015)

Gender ldentity
Gender identity is perceived as subjective and based on self-identification (Shively
& De Cecco, 1993 as cited in Social Psychology in the Philippine Context, 2013). It is
defined as a personal conception of oneself as male or female a blend of both or
neither-how individuals perceive themselves and what they call themselves. One's
gender identity can be the same or different from their sex assigned at birth. Gender
identity is often assumed to match one's biological sex. However, human experience
shows proof that one's biological sex may not always match one's psychological gender
(Golden, 2009).

Kevin Balot - transgender. The first

a
Filipina
transgender who won and crowned as the Miss
International Queen 2012 held in
Pattaya, Thailand.

BB
Gandang Hari Rustom Padilla's legal identity
-

has been changed to Binibini

Gandanghari, and her
gender formally recognized as female. A Los
court approved the name and Angeles
gender change documents.

Jake Zyrus (born Charmaine

Pempengco, May 10, 1992), who Clarice Relucio
mononym Charice until his performed under the
Filipino singer who rose to gender transition to male a
popularity through YouTube

46
Understanding the Self
 Aiza Seguerra spoke at length about his sexual
orientation in an interview on "Aquino and Abunda

Tonight" back in August 2014. Seguerra said he realized

that he is transgender after a long time of having
unanswered questions.

Geraldine Roman is the first transgender politician

in the Philippines. Roman won a seat in the first district
student 'in
of Bataan in the 2016 elections. A graduate
head
Applied Mathematics, she was the first transgender
of the student council at the University of the Philippines.

Aspects of Sexuality
several researches today the aspects of sexuality. These
that focus on
There are
sexual desire, sexual agencies and
include the sexual pleasure, sexual satisfaction,
sexual self-concept. Below are the definitions of these terms.

movement of
satisfaction that arises from the
Sexual Pleasure. The emotional
reaches its
the act of procreation. This pleasure
those organs and secretions that aid
the emission of seed or in
m a n in the pleasure that accompanies
peak in a healthy
of some secretion from
women and youth below
the age of puberty in the diffusion
2017)
the sexual glands. (Trinity Communications,
fulfilled and satisfied with one's sexual life, may
Sexual Satisfaction. Feeling
and psychological/emotional
satisfaction (Higgins, Trussel1,
include both physical
Moore, & Davidson, 2010)
attention to sexual
state that generates increased
Sexual Desire. A motivational
arousal (Basson & Schultz, 2007).
stimuli, and variable subjective and physiologic
the way that accomplishes your goals.
ability to act in a
Sexual Agency. Agency is act
in an area of your life is to have the capacity to
(Madsen, 2014) To have agency "sexual
the results you want. In sexuality, when we say
in way that can produce
a
to
of skills, rights and abilities. According
agency," it is composed of complex group
Madsen (2014), sexual agency includes:
whether that means along the
define yourself sexually
-

The ability to
the spectrum that runs from
heterosexuality/homosexuality spectrum, along
asexual to highly interested in sex, or both.

not want to experience sexual activity - both

The ability to choose whether or you
at a specific time in a specific way.
in general and with a specific person
to choose how you
want to engage in sexual activity.
The ability
Understanding the Self + 47
 wanted o r to refuse
act that is no longer
in a sexual
C
dDlity to stop engaging
an act that was never desired. is
a r e in
control of what the
other words, if you have this
sexual agency, you
n 15 defined by
sex life.
Your sexuality
when it c o m e s to your
"limitations"
must and of others.
your choices and not by the perceptions

SEXUAL SELF CONCEPT how you view

"sexual self-view." It perceives
Sexual self-concept is also referred as
and women
in love with women
yourself sexually, (Garcia, et al., 1999). Men can fall
or predominantly
sexually attracted toPeople
men. who are attracted to and love only
self-accordingly (Hyde 1990).
members of the opposite sex perceive viewing sexual
construct that reters to an
Sexual self-concept is considered a multi-dimensional
individual's positive and negative perceptions and feelings about him- or herself as a
sexual being," (Rostosky, Dekhtyar, Cupp & Anderman, 2008). It is a complex mix of
factors. There are
physiological, interpersonal, cultural, emotional and psychological
three (3) aspects of sexual self-concept. These include the following:

Sexual Self-esteem
The sexual self-esteemis afeeling ofself-worth
Sex isn't in sexual situations, (Buzwell and Rosenthal,
everything and you
don't need to have sex to be 1996). Confidence in the capacity to experience
in a good relationship. Just one's sexuality has a sexual self-esteem (Aubrey
find someone who you love (2007). Sexual self-esteem tends to positively
and who loves you back. Sex evaluate one's own capacity to
engage in healthy
isn't something mandatory. sexual behaviors and to experience one's
Never think that it is sexuality in a
satisfying and enjoyable way. Sub
factors are defined as follows:
Sexual behavior perceptions of one's overall
sexuality, with whom have you actually
had sex? People express their sexual self
through their intimate It relationships.
very much linked to how people from romantic
for attachment, intimacy and love relationships and meet their needs
(APA, 2008). In males, associated
virility and an innate sexual drive that is with strength,
(Connell & Messerschmidt, 2005).
typically expressed in risky sexual behavior
Sexual conduct feelings of adequacy of
behavior in sexual
partner. Individuals who conduct themselves situations and with
hegemonic masculinities and femininitiesa set of sexually in a manner
consistent with
how "normal and real" men and women should characteristics that are ascribed to
act
Cevual (Connell, 2009),
attractiveness feelings of sexual
appearance and
are vol Sexually attracted? In the desirability, with whom
PhiliPpines, Ofreneo (2003),
emotional preference affirmed person sexually. sexual attraction and

48 Understanding the Self

Sexual Anxiety
Sexual anxiety tends to feel tension,
discomfort, and anxiety about the sexual My boyfriend makes me feel
aspects of one's life, (Snell, 1998). According guilty for days if I don't have
to the study, traditional sex role propose that sex with him. But why would I

open expressions of sexuality are seen as wanna have sex with someone
shameful for women who are not married, (or who won't give me the time of
at least not strongly committed), married and day unless he wants something
strongly committed women are expected to from me.
yield to their male partners' sexual desires,
becoming capable sexual counterparts who are able to satisfy their partners. High
levels of sexual anxiety within committed relationships is seen negatively, these
women are portrayed as "frigid"; as they are unable to perform what is an important
role for traditional females (sexually pleasing your male counterpart), this ultimately
undermines their femininity. Therefore, depending on the relationship context,
sexual anxiety (as a single, virtuous woman), or not (as a committed, capable female
partner) for women endorsing traditional sex roles and thus men and women may
receive different environmental (social) feedback regarding their sexual behaviors
and conduct, which in turn may influence their sexual self-concepts (Schippers, 2007;
Reid and Bing, 2000).

Sexual Self-exploration
Scientific studies are replete with data suggesting that most teenagers admit
that they are too young to engage in sexual intercourse. But between the compelling
nature of the sex urge and immense social pressure, many teenagers succumb,
oftentimes ruining their first sexual experience (sometimes causing collateral damage
to subsequent sexual experiences as wel) on account of their inexperience and the

guilt oftentimes associated with under-aged and/or premarital sex.

But much of the urge to engage prematurely in sexual intercourse would perhaps
dissipate if young people were presented with the alternatives of erotic self-exploration
and masturbation.
Children, from as early as three or four years old, if left to their own devices,
will engage in sexual play-whether in the form of playing "house" or "doctor" or a
variation thereof. And provided that all the participants are approximately of the same
amounts to little than
inexperience, such curiosity-driven play usually
more
age and
"show-and-tell" and is not only generally harmless but, arguably healthy. Then, in the
year's immediately preceding puberty, the sexes tend to naturally separate, forming
same-gender alliances, often to the exclusion of the opposite gender. In the early
pubescent years, however, boys and girls rekindle their interests in each other-only
this time, it is not to play "Mommy and Daddy," it is to be Mommy and Daddy, even
intention. So it is at that juncture that
though parenthood may not be their specific

Understanding the Self* 49

 their
society-for;good reason-tries to keep boys and girls apart, despite compelling
ing
urges to be together.
is powerful urge. So teenagers
thoughtful people. And sex a
But teenagers are

unfortunately, to their detriment: unwanted

Tigure out ways to have sex, oftentimes,
sometimes physical) scars, bad
pregnancies, tarnished reputations, enmotional (and
transmitted diseases, for example. Perhaps if they had
Tirst experiences, and sexually
masturbation as viable alternatives
been presented with erotic self-exploration and
to sexual intercourse, they would have
avoided the trauma of premature coitus and

prepared themselves for a future of healthy sexual

instead privately and shamelessly
relations.
SEX AND RELATIONSHIPS
Concomitant to the discussion on sexual self is the views of the individuals on
sexual relationships and conduct. This section will explore the prevailing as well as
the emerging norms on sex and relationships.

Emerging Sexual Tend

Partner Swapping. Swinging, sometimes
called wife swapping or partner, is a non-
monogamous behavior in which both singles
and partners in a committed relationship
engage in sexual activities with others as

recreational or social.
Orgies. These are parties where people
Having multiple sex partners
engage in unrestrained intimacy with each
is an emerging trend
other. It happens with both strangers and
known people.

Understanding the Self 51

 The Online Space abbreviated porn) is the
Pornography (often
matter for the purpose
portrayal of sexual subject
be presented
sexual arousal. Pornography may
of
including books, magazines.
in a variety of media,
postcards, photographs, sculpture, drawing
animation, sound recording, writing,
painting
video games.
film, video, and
depictions are pornographic,
The primary subjects of present-day pornographic
who perform
actors or porn stars,
who pose for still photographs, and pornographic
also called computer sex, Internet sex, net sex and, colloquially, cyber
or
in Cybersex,
cybering is a encounter in which people connected remotely Via send
two or more
either within
each other messages describing a sexual experience. Cybersex can occur
the context of existing or intimate relationships, (e.g. among lovers who who are
are

geographically separated, or among individuals who have no prior knowledge of one

another and meet in virtual spaces or cyberspaces and may even remain anonymous
to one another). In some contexts cybersex is enhanced by the use of a to transmit
real-time video of the partners.

Education, Guidance, and Support

SEX ED: Developing a sexual self-concept is
is an
1. Do not have sex important developmental task of adolescence.
2. See number 1 However, little empirical evidence describes this
3. See number 2 development, nor how these changes are related
4. See number 3
to development in sexual behavior.
UNDERSTANDING AND SUPPORTING SEXUALITY
Remember that you can still contribute to an equal, supportivve and non.
non.
discriminatory society. Here are some tips to accepting any identity.
Try to educate people about the issues surrounding sexual identity.
Make sure workplace is friendly and visibly supportive towards sexuality
your
and gender diverse young
people (through signage, etc).
It is important to affirm to young
people that gender and sexuality are always
diverse and that gender and sexuality differences
are normal and healthy.
It may be helpful to reiterate to
young people that no one else can dictate their
gender and sexuality, and that they have the right to make their own choices
regarding their gender and sexuality.
It can be helpful to direct young
people to support services that specialize in
gender identity and sexuality support services that can be
anonymous
Be open in conversations about your opinion of people with different sexua
orientation. Make sure your friends know that
and respective of people's choice.
you are a gender sensitive individua
Assume that about 10% of people you go to school
with and socialize with are individuals with with, play sport with, wors
different sexual orientation and many
others will have family members and friends
with gender and sexual orientatio"
issues.

56 Understanding the Self