Winning TOEFL Essays

The Right Way

Real Essay Examples From Real Full-Scoring

TOEFL Students
Corrections and Analysis by Professional
TOEFL Teachers

Konnie Wong
&
Matthew Preston
Copyright © 2017 Konnie Wong & Matthew Preston
All rights reserved.

ISBN: 1981381317
ISBN-13: 978-1981381319
 Contents

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
FOREWORD
1 Introduction
2 About Us
3 TOEFL Scoring
4 Our Methodology
5 Our TIPS System
6 Full-Scoring TOEFL Phrases
7 Full-Scoring Sentence Structures
8 Thematic Vocabulary
9 Idioms
10 Student Writing
ABOUT THE AUTHORS
 ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

Scoring well on the TOEFL test is a major achievement for hardworking

students, and is often a stepping stone for greater things ahead. Years of
practical classroom experience have gone into the creation of this book and
its teaching methods. Over this time span, we’ve seen hundreds of students
go from a basic level of understanding to being able to achieve full scores on
their TOEFL exams. The reason the system in this book has come together
so well has been a combination of several factors.

First, we sincerely thank fellow language teachers who have offered

insight, feedback and suggestions: it’s always valuable to have objective and
constructive input from other skilled professionals.

Most importantly, we want to thank all of our students for choosing to

invest in their own futures through their constant and consistent hard work.
By putting your trust in us and our teaching system, we have achieved
success together.
 FOREWORD
Welcome to WINNING TOEFL ESSAYS THE RIGHT WAY.
Students want a high score, using the most efficient and effective means
possible. After years of hard work creating our system, this is exactly what
we provide in this book.

Achieving a high score on the TOEFL test is a learnable skill, and we’ve
dissected it into manageable pieces for easy absorption. By following our
unique TIPS system, you too can achieve a winning score on your TOEFL
test.

Your path to a full score, to a WINNING score, begins here.

 1 Introduction

Why did we write this book?

As professional TOEFL instructors, we’ve been marking thousands of

essays over the years, spotting the same grammatical and organizational
mistakes over and over again. We recognized that students could hugely
benefit from a system that was simple, effective and resulted in far better
writing.

The mistakes we frequently saw involved grammar, poor sentence

structures, and incomplete expression of ideas.

We knew it should be simple, but many students were still struggling.

After years of experience with these common problems, we found a way to
make TOEFL writing simple, which is what we’ve created here with
WINNING TOEFL ESSAYS THE RIGHT WAY.

Who is this book aimed at?

Students of all levels can benefit from the materials presented in this
book, either as part of their own self-study or as part of a class. It’s also a
great resource for teachers, who can break up the separate components of the
system and focus on specific skillsets as required.

While this book has been tailored towards TOEFL Independent Writing
responses, the TIPS System is beneficial to any type of standardized
writing test. Anyone from high school level onwards who wants to improve
at English, this book will have tremendous benefit due to its organized and
systematic approach.

On top of this, anyone wishing to improve SPEAKING skills can use our
system to work towards native-level fluency. The great thing about our
system is that it can be used to improve and organize all aspects of your
English. In this way, it’s beneficial for all aspects of your English abilities
and the TOEFL exam.

How can students of different levels use this book?

What’s often lacking in students is “mileage”, meaning time spent

working on a necessary skill. If students don’t know what to focus on, they
often get lost in the maze of English. Naturally, beginning level students
require more directed studies to keep them on track and to prevent errors
early on. Mid to high level learners need to self-correct, self-analyze, and
focus on reducing high-percentage errors. Regardless of your level, you need
to know what the important pieces of the puzzle are so you can stay on task
and invest your time and energy correctly.

Our examples in this book show the student’s original essay response, the
teacher’s corrected version, then an analysis page to explain the parts of the
essay (also, the first 13 responses have a “full-scoring final version”).
Students should compare the student and teacher versions, check the content
analysis, then go back and study the individual parts of the TIPS. Being able
to break the parts down to more manageable sizes helps to focus on and
improve specific skills without getting overwhelmed. This is a methodical
and organized approached to increase your mileage without getting lost or
wasting time. Students of all levels need to understand the vital parts in
order to create their own full-scoring responses.

What are the aims of this book?

To find our way, we need a proper map to guide us. This books aims to
be the map for solid TOEFL writing responses. We have detailed
explanations of our TIPS System, and give multiple examples of how this
works, both in “before and after” formats. We analyze each example in order
to help you understand the concepts and apply them to your own work. Our
aim is to provide you with a proper study framework which enables you to
craft full-scoring TOEFL independent writing essays. In short, we show
students an efficient, practical, effective and simple way to achieve a top
score on the test.

How is this book organized?

We’ve written chapters for each part of a full-scoring essay, including

each individual element of the TIPS System, describing how they’re used
and their role in writing proper responses. The chapters are presented in the
order that we recommend they be studied and understood, creating a
functional framework before moving to more complicated elements and
filling in the subtleties. They are given in this order: PHRASES (“chunks”
that express ideas clearly and help to generate ideas for thorough responses),
SENTENCE STRUCTURES (common and frequently used grammar
patterns that can be adapted for all response types), THEMATIC
VOCABULARY (necessary words to convey ideas according to specific
topics), and finally IDIOMS (the more abstract components of language
which add a “polish” to the overall essay). We’ve found that the most
effective approach to the TIPS System is to study it as “PSTI”.

How do I use this book?

There are many ways to approach the system, depending on your level
and your learning style. It’s recommended to start with the given pieces and
build up to the larger whole. When starting out it’s best to understand each
of the individual parts of the TIPS System, seeing how they fit within the
overall framework of your responses. This way you’ll be able to see how you
can “recycle” parts of your answers for other questions, making your
responses more coherent and efficient. Starting small also helps with creating
“quality over quantity”. In other words, your answers will be much higher
level in a shorter period of time if you build the right foundations.

Once you’ve developed each individual skill, you can then work on
several or all of them at the same time. Ultimately you’ll be using all of the
parts of the system together, and begin working with time limits so you can
create effective answers within the time constraints of the exam. Like any
great project, we create a solid foundation, and then build the rest of the
structure on top of it. Your solid TOEFL skills come from the strong
fundamentals we provide you with.

How is this book different from other books?

Of course this manual has been written by experienced TOEFL teachers

and an ETS Certified Test Administrator, therefore its content and concepts
are authentic and current. We have focused attention on important aspects,
broken down and analyzed these parts in order to help you create top-quality
TOEFL answers in the shortest time possible. Our new TIPS System is what
makes this book stand out from the others, as it shows the small parts of a
full-scoring answer, and shows students how to use them in the same way to
create great responses.

Another aspect that makes this book unique is that we’ve taken real
students’ essay examples, and shown how they’ve progressed from low to
high scores. The real student work shown in this text comes from students
who took the TOEFL iBT test and received full scores in the writing
component.

We took examples of these students’ writing from classes and corrected

them in a comprehensive and detailed manner so they achieved a full score.
Using our TIPS System, we coached them to a 30/30. Not only do we show
the “before” and “after” writing, more importantly we show the process to get
there, and can see how you can also get the same results.

The student “before” versions are worth seeing as they show the most
common mistakes students make in English writing. These mistakes are so
common that students don’t realize they’re making them. We point out these
errors and correct them as part of our overall TIPS System.
 2 About Us
KONNIE WONG

Canadian Konnie Wong is a University of Toronto Alumni who

graduated with Honors, earning a Bachelor of Arts.

Is an expert in Advanced TESOL teaching, with specialization in

teaching TOEFL and Business English. (Konnie is an ETS
Certified TOEFL Main Administrator).

Is certified in ESOL Examinations issued by the University of

Cambridge.

Over the past 12 years, she has been a specially-appointed English

Consultant for several renowned firms such as Google, Citibank,
Porsche, HP, and Medtronic.

Guides students’ throughout the application process into top tier

colleges and Master’s programs in the U.S., the U.K., and Canada
with scholarship offers.

Hosts Phonics, TOEFL, and school application seminars at top

ranking high schools and universities in Taipei, Taiwan.

An English instructor with extensive experience, Konnie also tutors

 in her spare time to children and adults of different levels.

Recruited and trained teachers, spearheaded curriculum planning,

and delivered fun and interactive lessons in various private
language schools.

Coordinated Japanese and Taiwanese international students in

English summer camps in Canada.

MATTHEW PRESTON

Matthew is a native English speaker from Western Canada who has

been living and teaching English in Asia for well over a decade.
Graduated with Honors from the University of Calgary, earning a
Bachelor of Arts.

Has extensive experience teaching English in Canada, Korea,

Thailand and Taiwan to students ranging from young children to
University Professors and other professionals.

Varied experience includes ESL/EFL teacher training and hiring,

curriculum planning and design, as well as teaching both large
group and one-on-one sessions.

From beginners to advanced students, his classes have included

Grammar, Vocabulary, Pronunciation, Conversation, Reading,
Writing, Business, News and Media classes. He also teaches
classes in TOEIC, TOEFL, IELTS and BULATS, preparing
 students for standardized testing and overseas studies.

As an adult student he learned to speak Mandarin Chinese, so

understands the process and challenges of learning a foreign
language.

Taught multiple English language seminars in top High Schools in

Taiwan.

His tutoring classes have included Master’s Degree Students,

University Professors, Bank Managers, Accountants, Business
Owners, as well as other professionals.

TESTIMONIALS FROM OUR FULL-SCORING

STUDENTS
These are real testimonials from many students over the years who
found our teaching methods extremely helpful in achieving success with
their TOEFL writing goals.

“Dear Konnie, the writing structures have helped me

tremendously, now I no longer get stuck on coming up with ideas.”
–Jordy

“At the beginning, I wasn’t sure if I could get over 110 on TOEFL.
However, your writing structures boosted my confidence and
studying TOEFL became an enjoyable thing.” – Ben

“The phrases you taught us in TOEFL class are also extremely

useful in writing college application essays. Thank you for making
me more confident and giving me the courage to face TOEFL.” –
Sherry

“Thank you for making such a dull topic so engaging. Your

materials including the phrases, sentence structures, theme
vocabulary and sophisticated ideas are what propelled me towards
success – a 114 in TOEFL with 30/30 in the writing section. I am
lucky to have a teacher like you.” – Belinda

“Dear Konnie, thank you for helping me improve my writing score

from a 17 to 29 in a mere 2 month period. Without you, there is no
way I could have achieved this.” – Chih Lin

“Hey Matthew, your materials rock. They are the most useful and
tactical. Thank you for going out of your way to organize our
notes.” – Will

“Dear Matthew, your clear, concise teaching along with official

questions and real student samples really helped me a lot. Without
them, I would not have gotten a 29 in the writing section.” – Ian

“Hi Konnie, thank you for pulling up my writing score by 8 points

the second time around. Your materials are easy to understand yet
powerful.” – Isaac

“Dear Konnie, your grammar corrections on our essays, your

structures, and categorized vocabulary really made learning
TOEFL a walk in the park. Thank you.” – Jack

“Matthew, thanks to you, I can now brainstorm ideas within a few

minutes, and I no longer get a brain freeze. The phrases themselves
are great main ideas.” – Raymond

“Dear Konnie, thank you for your amazing and magical writing
tips. I got 29 in the writing section and just received an offer from
UBC in Vancouver.” – Lavino

“Dear Matthew, thank you for teaching us how to come up with an

impressive essay within seconds. I love your fish bone structure!
When the scores came back with a 30 in the writing section, I
almost fainted!” -- Marcus
 3 TOEFL Scoring

Scoring Methodology For The Writing Section

For the Writing component of the TOEFL test, you will first be asked to
do an Integrated Writing task followed by an Independent Writing task (the
focus of our book). Qualified evaluators will score each essay on a holistic
scale of 0-5. The scores for each task will be averaged and then converted to
get a Writing Section score of 0-30 on the official grade report card.

Holistic Rating Scaled Score

5.0 30
4.5 28
4.0 25
3.5 22
3.0 20
2.5 17
2.0 14
1.5 11
1.0 8
0 0

*A score 5 essay would meet the following criteria:

1. It addresses the question and does not go off track.

2. It has a word count of at least 300, ideally somewhere around 350-
400.
3. It is well organized, coherent, and well-developed.
4. It shows appropriate vocabulary, idioms, and syntactic variety.
5. It has specific examples, details and explanations.
6. Its main points are fully elaborated.
 4 Our Methodology

1) On the test you are given 30 minutes to complete the Independent

Writing task.
2) You should aim for a 350-400 word count.

FOUR TYPES OF QUESTIONS

Within our system of teaching, we’ve categorized the questions into
FOUR TYPES. In order to analyze the questions correctly and maximize
your scoring potential, you should understand that these TOEFL questions
can be organized into four general groups:

1. OPEN-ENDED: For this type, there is no one “correct” answer, as it’s

based on personal preference or explanation. Answers need to be clearly
organized and supported with proper explanations, reasons and examples.
e.g. What changes do you think there will be in the next century?

2.PREFERENCE A or B: For this question type, you must explain why

you prefer one choice over another, backed up with clear reasoning and
examples. This category is basically: “Do you prefer A or B”.
e.g. Do you prefer traveling alone or with companions?

3.COMPARE AND CONTRAST A and B: Answers must show an

understanding of both choices, explaining their similarities and differences.
You must then express a preference for one over the other, giving clear
reasons for making this choice.
e.g. Compare and contrast the advantages of raising kids in the city and
doing so in the countryside. Which do you prefer and why?

4.AGREE OR DISAGREE? Students must explain a viewpoint on a

topic, giving pertinent reasons and examples for agreeing or disagreeing.
e.g. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement: People
should sometimes do things that they don’t enjoy doing.
 Each type has patterns, phrasing and organization that can help increase
your scoring potentiality, so learning to recognize these elements is a useful
and effective strategy. Once you know which type of question you’re
answering, you can plan your answer, organization and wording accordingly
(See pages 20-23 for further details).

The essay examples in this text are clearly labelled according to which
essay types they are, which makes it easier to see how the answers are
structured.

INTEGRATED vs. INDEPENDENT WRITING

In the Integrated Writing section of the test, you read a passage, listen to a
lecture, then write an appropriate response, integrating both into your answer.
You must give a summary of the content, and explain why the lecturer
agrees/disagrees with the reading passage, explaining the
similarities/difference in approach or opinion with regard to the same topic.

The Integrated writing section involves a different approach and structure

than what is presented as the core of this book. This manual deals specifically
with independent writing tasks, so the idioms, phrases and sentence structures
won’t be a part of an Integrated response. However, keep in mind that the
Thematic Vocabulary lists have great value for the TOEFL test overall, and
having strong familiarity with these words is important. For the
INTEGRATED section of the exam, these thematic vocabulary words will
have strong utility for comprehending the reading passages and lectures.

While the material in this book deals specifically with the Independent
Writing task, keep in mind that the vocabulary, sentence structures, phrases
and idioms described in this text can be used in other structured academic
writing responses as well, such as IELTS, GMAT, or GRE, as well as any
academic essay.

Furthermore, the material in this book is also extremely useful for the
SPEAKING portions of the exam, so it’s useful to try and approach your
studies for the TOEFL test in a holistic way. If you find ways to effectively
utilize the material presented here into your overall TOEFL studies, you can
maximize your results and make your study time more efficient. In other
words, try to see how you can include the organization, vocabulary, phrases,
idioms and sentence structures in this text into your TOEFL Speaking
responses as well.

From Wikipedia: The Writing section measures a test taker's ability to write in an academic
setting and consists of two tasks: one integrated and one independent. In the integrated task, test-
takers read a passage on an academic topic and then listen to a speaker discuss it. The test-taker then
writes a summary about the important points in the listening passage and explains how these relate to
the key points of the reading passage. In the independent task, the test-taker must write an essay
that states their opinion or choice, and then explain it, rather than simply listing personal
preferences or choices. Responses are sent to the ETS OSN and evaluated by at least 3 different
raters.

This description for Independent Writing questions is very general, and

doesn’t describe the finer details of how to achieve full-scoring essays.
Creating a winning answer goes beyond just stating an opinion or choice, as
you have to have the proper framework to express your ideas in order to
achieve full scores. The purpose of this book is to expand upon the important
aspects of Independent Writing and give you a great system for creating top-
quality answers.

WHAT ARE THE SECTIONS OF THIS BOOK?

We’ve organized things in a logical progression: PHRASES, SENTENCE
STRUCTURES, THEMED VOCABULARY, and then IDIOMS. At the end
of this text we present students’ writing examples to show how they initially
answered the questions, and how we improved upon their responses by
integrating the language elements of our system. As such, you can see how
these components add to and polish the students’ explanations and improve
them, using a system that has been proven to result in higher test scores.

The first section is the PHRASES component, which includes many

colloquial sayings that are useful for making responses seem more thought-
out and natural. Each one is generally relevant across several topics, and as
previously mentioned, can be used in speaking responses as well. These
phrases smooth out the written response and help to solidify the overall idea
or concept of the writing. See the later section titled “Reverse Engineering”
(page 15) on how phrases are also used to generate ideas for more natural
responses. These are the crucial component parts of an effective written
response.

The downside to simply memorizing vocabulary is that it often gets used

incorrectly. The next things we’ve done is included high-percentage
SENTENCE STRUCTURES that include topical vocabulary so students can
see how to properly integrate it into responses. These are vital for providing
context to the topical vocabulary words.

Next, VOCABULARY is included by THEME, which means you can

focus on weak areas or notice topics for which you’re lacking a varied
vernacular. You want to be well-rounded with your vocabulary so you can
answer the variety of academic topics found on the test. Rather than
memorize 1000 random academic words, you can focus on topics you’re not
as familiar with. These themed lists ensure you have a strong vocabulary
foundation.

The final language component is IDIOMS, which must be used sparingly

and correctly. Idioms are the spice which make for an interesting and fluent
response, showing a student’s ability to respond in a natural way. These are
included alphabetically, and should only be added to a response if they’re
fully understood. Viewing sample writing responses from other students
assists with this.

How this is all integrated into the writing is further discussed in the
“OUR TIPS SYSTEM” section that follows (page 18). This section also
discusses the organization for the four different categories of questions on the
TOEFL test.

GENERAL ADVICE
As a recommendation, one should go through these sections in order,
building up a solid foundation first. Some of the best results have come from
following this regimen:

1.Studying necessary Phrases, Sentence Structures and Thematic

Vocabulary for the first while, making sure you have a strong and varied
language base. Once you’ve established a strong foundation with these, start
to add in a variety of Idioms into the practice essays.
 2.Reading other essay examples, seeing how these words and phrases
work inside the structure of the essay.

3.Doing lots of writing practice for each of the essay types, keeping it
organized and using the Phrases, Sentence Structures, Thematic Vocabulary
and Idioms in your own work, getting feedback from a qualified instructor to
adjust problem areas.

4.Try to include these language points in your speaking practice as well,

which will reinforce their meanings and solidify your understanding of them.

REVERSE ENGINEERING
One method of coming up with answers for your Independent Writing
answers is a form of “Reverse Engineering”, using the PHRASES listed in
this book to come up with creative and functional examples. In other words,
we use PHRASES to create ideas for responses.

When answering a question, students often find it challenging to choose a

proper phrase to fit their answer. Often times it’s easier to choose a phrase
first and generate an answer from that instead. Using this approach, answers
tend to sound more natural, and it creates a smoother overall writing style
than trying to “shoe horn in” or force in a phrase after the fact.

For example, if the question asks something like, “Explain a memorable

class you’ve taken before”, it may be difficult to come up with a specific
example, as the student may never have had a good class before, or perhaps
the thinking of a specific example is too vague from memory. However, if
you choose a PHRASE such as “it expanded my social circle” first, one can
then create a narrative around this phrase, which not only fits with the answer
but is a core part of the reply.

Keep in mind that when answering the questions on the test, the truth or
authenticity of one’s stories is not of vital importance, rather, the ability to
show academic English competence through one’s writing is key. As long as
a made-up story is coherent, and completely and correctly answers the
question in an organized and appropriate fashion, then its veracity is
secondary. Simply put: it’s okay to lie.

So, if one then creates a fictional story using the phrase about “expanding
one’s social circle” that answers the question well and with competent
academic English, then the purpose is served. From this, one could speak
about meeting new classmates (the new, expanded social circle), how they
worked on projects together, how they interacted and learned, and how it was
an overall positive experience (thus being a “memorable class”, answering
the question clearly).

One could then flow into using another phrase about “expanding one’s
cultural awareness”, referring to how these classmates came from different
countries and cultural backgrounds. Continuing this train of thought,
examples could include different foods, customs, fashions, etc. as needed to
flesh out the details of an essay’s body paragraph. This way, students are
forced to integrate these high level English patterns into a response from the
very beginning, generating examples in reverse; hence the term “reverse
engineering”. In this way, writing comes out smoother, less choppy, and
with both vocabulary and examples utilized correctly.

Another benefit to this approach is that students better understand the

actual meanings and uses of the phrases, and begin to blend them into both
written and spoken responses in a more natural way. As an exercise, students
should go through the high percentage phrases, creating responses to various
TOEFL questions, using the PHRASES as the core part of the answer. For
example:

Q: Would you prefer to raise kids in the country or the city?

Possible Response #1 (for city) (PHRASES in bold)

Body Paragraph 1: acquire a wealth of knowledge, immerse in

different cultures
Body Paragraph 2: expand social circle through different activities
Body Paragraph 3: gain a competitive edge (because of a more
complete or modern education system)
 Possible Response #2 (for country)

Body Paragraph 1: spark curiosity (make up own games for

entertainment)
Body Paragraph 2: strengthen family bond (parents are generally less
busy), or get a sense of belonging (smaller, tighter community)
Body Paragraph 3: soothe daily stress, exist in harmony (living near
Mother Nature)
 5 Our TIPS System

One of the most effective metaphors for describing the writing

organization for the TOEFL test is the “FISHBONE” structure. Essentially,
both the INTRODUCTION and CONCLUSION are quite small, consisting
of very short, concise sentences to introduce or summarize the topic. These
parts make up the head and tail of our “fish”, respectively. The BODY of the
essay/fish is where the “meat” of the response is, which is where we include
all the examples and supporting details (See diagram at the end of this
section).

Doing writing practice according to this structure has worked very well
for many students over the years, as it provides a solid framework to build
coherent answers on. As a general rule, this structure needs THEMED
VOCABULARY, one IDIOM, several PHRASES, and SENTENCE
STRUCTURES (TIPS) from our different sections, detailed in the following
chapters. (In the sample writing, THEMED VOCABULARY are bold,
IDIOMS are bold and in italics, PHRASES are bold and begin with a verb,
and SENTENCE STRUCTURES are underlined.)

Consolidated in this way, answers appear well-rounded and well-formed.

Students should come across as paying attention to global events and keeping
abreast of current news stories. Having an established writing structure to
plug such details into helps to portray this, as students can focus more on the
content rather than scrambling to tie it together into a coherent response
during the test. Basically, the core parts, the “bones”, need to be in place so
that during the exam all you have to worry about is what “meat” to include.
As such, drilling the “Fishbone” organization and integrating the component
parts (TIPS) is necessary for a smooth, full-scoring test answer.

Within the response, students need a social example as well as a personal

one, which shows a well-read and knowledgeable answer. Writing drills
using the TIPS as guides helps students come up with such personal and
social examples, so a lot of writing practice time should be invested in this.

The purpose of standardized tests like TOEFL is to SHOW YOUR

ENGLISH. The fewer grammar problems you have, the higher score you’ll
get: it’s as simple as that. Practicing the Sentence Structures we’ve provided
helps to alleviate grammar problems, as correct grammar is built right into
the response. As stated before, simple memorization of vocabulary often
results in incorrect use. However, using our Sentence Structures provides a
better process, as they show you how to use Thematic Vocabulary in
relevant, complete, and grammatically correct patterns. Fewer grammar
problems= fewer deductions. Our Sentence Structures are the solution. Once
again, to keep them obvious for TOEFL learners, SENTENCE
STRUCTURES are underlined in the example essays in the later section.

LENGTH

While some students may become overwhelmed by having to write

“long” essays such as these, once you understand how our system works it’s
actually quite easy. Think of our TIPS system as a “recipe” for creating
complete, well-rounded essay responses. A good full-scoring independent
essay should fall somewhere in between 350-400 words. Keep in mind that
there’s no maximum length for an essay, but an answer should have a
minimum word count of at least 300 words.

IDEAS

The stronger ideas are usually best to include in the first body
paragraph. This is also useful as part of your time strategy: in case time is
short during the actual exam, you’ll at least have demonstrated some of your
strongest ideas, examples and English patterns.

EXAMPLES

It’s important to include examples in your essay, which should include a

combination of societal/social, personal, and historical illustrations. In the
example essays at the end of this text, you’ll see a mix of these example
types, which makes for a stronger argument, more interesting writing, and
more comprehensive answer for the exam.
 RECYCLING

As we’ve demonstrated with our final few essays, the parts of these
written answers can be “recycled” and used to answer other questions with a
similar topic or theme. Essentially, the same or similar wording, examples,
phrases, idioms and sentence structures can be “copy and pasted” to answer
other comparable TOEFL questions. Examples of this are found in essays 33
through 36. For instance, all the body paragraphs in essay 36 are extremely
similar to the ones from essays one and nine, yet they still offer a complete,
relevant response. If you compare the responses you can see that the phrases
are the same, and the overall gist of the body paragraphs are related. There
are some slight adjustments in the sentence structures to logically fit the
questions, but the purpose and primary TIPS elements are all intact. Learning
how to “recycle” aspects of the system for topically similar questions is a
very useful skill for winning scores on the test.

THE TYPES OF ESSAYS AND THEIR ORGANIZATION

Below are descriptions of the outlines for the various types of questions
found on the TOEFL independent writing portion of the test. While not “set
in stone”, these are some guidelines which are extremely useful for all
students, as they demonstrate language elements required for a stronger
response.

1. OPEN ENDED QUESTIONS:

Open ended questions don’t have a “right” or “wrong” answer, so it’s up
to the student to describe a clear example that is organized and well-rounded.
Responses need to show understanding of broader societal issues or
highlights about the topic, so choosing large examples for the body
paragraphs makes it easier to flesh out the details. Find one point for each
body paragraph and make it really strong.

Q: Talk about a memorable trip that you’ve taken. What was

memorable about it?

INTRO: The introduction should include important answers to the

5W’s: Who, what, where, when, why? Choose a place to describe in your
answer. For example, “CANADA”.

BODY PARAGRAPH 1: For example, the FOOD. Choose Phrases to

help generate ideas. Add an example so it stands out from other
writings. Integrate Sentence Structures and transitions. Find Thematic
Vocabulary.

BODY PARAGRAPH 2: For example, the SCENERY. Choose Phrases

to help generate ideas. Add an example. Integrate Sentence Structures and
transitions. Find Thematic Vocabulary.

BODY PARAGRAPH 3: For example, the PEOPLE. Choose Phrases to

help generate ideas. Add an example. Integrate Sentence Structures and
transitions. Find Thematic Vocabulary.

CONCLUSION: Summarize your main ideas and restate the introduction.

2. PREFERENCE
Q: Would you prefer to raise kids in the country or the city?

INTRO: State a preference. For example, “the CITY”.

BODY PARAGRAPH 1: Mention the first benefit of city living:

RESOURCES (ex. clubs, sports teams, activities on weekends, shows,
entertainment)

BODY PARAGRAPH 2: Discuss another advantage to city life:

EDUCATION (ex. more competitive, better education systems/teachers,
educational resources such as cram schools, libraries).

BODY PARAGRAPH 3: Show an understanding of the other point of

view: Although the other view is good for reason X, we show a third benefit
of own choice to refute this view. For instance: Although country living is
quieter, city living has many benefits to offset this such as having a variety of
cultures.
 CONCLUSION: Restate introduction’s point of view, “advantages of
living in the city outweigh those of the countryside”.

3. PREFERENCE: COMPARE and CONTRAST

Q: Some people prefer cooking at home, while others prefer eating out
at restaurants. Compare and contrast each and state which you prefer.

INTRO: Rephrase the question and state a preference. For example,

“RESTAURANTS”.

BODY PARAGRAPH 1: Explain the benefits of choice A (HOME). For

instance: healthier, more nutritious, social/family bonding, chores,
economical.

BODY PARAGRAPH 2: Outline the benefits of choice B

(RESTAURANTS). For example: less time consuming, no clean up, no
leftovers, more choices, relaxing, variety.

BODY PARAGRAPH 3: State a preference for one over the other

(RESTAURANTS). Mention more benefits to own choice, not mentioned in
body paragraph 2. Mention the downsides to opposite choice to show a
balanced perspective and strengthen one’s own argument.

CONCLUSION: Explain that while there are pros and cons to both,
restate own preference. “The benefits of choice A outweigh those of choice
B.”

4. AGREE OR DISAGREE?
Q: Do you agree with the following statement? Money is the most
powerful weapon in the world.

INTRO: Rephrase the question, then state a stance on the subject. For
example, “AGREE”.

BODY PARAGRAPH 1: Give the first reason to support one’s own view:
For example, it gives FREEDOM to do what you want.
 BODY PARAGRAPH 2: Give a second reason to support own view: For
instance, you can HELP others via charity, creating businesses and jobs,
infrastructure.
BODY PARAGRAPH 3: Mention the other point of view, but explain
why it’s not correct or not so strong. For example, donating one’s time to
charity only does so much, whereas money can help many more people.

CONCLUSION: Underscore your main point, making sure your stance is

clear.

FURTHER STRATEGIES
Here are some important aspects to keep in mind to improve your writing:

1. PRE-WRITE: Pre-writing is important. This means putting

together an OUTLINE and a STRATEGY, planning out which
specific components of TIPS you’re going to use.

2. IDEAS: Before writing, generate ideas (brainstorm) and plan how

you’ll incorporate them into the Fishbone Structure. Generating
ideas comes from practice using the TIPS system, and “Reverse
Engineering”.

3. TIMING: Practice both timed outlining and timed writing. In the

TOEFL Independent Writing task, you have only thirty minutes to
create an organized, coherent essay, so proper time management is
vital.

4. EDIT: Upon finishing the writing task, leave some time to go back
and find your own errors, making corrections. If you’ve already
practiced enough and properly integrated the system presented
here, the required editing should be minimal.
 REVISIONS
When you first start utilizing this writing system, you’ll probably have to
make more revisions, which will lessen with more time and more practice. In
the early stages, it’s a good idea to take a systematic approach to these
revisions.

1. REVERSE OUTLINE: After writing, go back and make a second

outline for the essay, this time in reverse. Instead of making an
outline and using that to expand your ideas, do the opposite: take
your completed essay and reduce it down to its main ideas (using
alternative wording if possible). Once again, it’s going to have a
Fishbone Structure, and should have the required TIPS components
listed out.

2. EDIT: Find ideas that are weaker or don’t fit in with the overall
cohesiveness of the writing. Decide if any ideas should be moved,
revised or taken out. This is a good stage to consult with a qualified
instructor to ask for suggestions and feedback.

3. BUILD MILEAGE: Re-write the essay with these modifications

and new elements. Learning to write effectively requires focused
mileage. Re-writing an essay is NOT wasted time as long as you’re
doing it mindfully and analytically, constantly honing your abilities
and investing your time well.
 6 Full-Scoring TOEFL Phrases

The following Phrases are a vital component when properly integrated

into your TOEFL writing. These are short, concise wordings that clearly
express relevant ideas within an essay response. They offer an answer to the
“why” element of the question, filling in details that otherwise get overlooked
when formulating an answer. These phrases are extremely useful for
generating ideas, helping to formulate solid responses to TOEFL questions.
In essence, they’re effective and general answers to common questions that
can easily be illustrated with personal and social examples, so consider these
phrases as the roots of your main ideas.

For example, if answering a type 1 question such as “Describe an

unforgettable trip you’ve taken”, phrases are used to actually generate ideas
for the answer. One could choose various phrases from the list below as part
of the reply, which gives a framework to add details to. How then did my
“unforgettable trip” help to “boost my confidence” (see TOEFL Phrases list,
section B, #9, below)? Using this phrase allows me to recall (or fabricate)
situations that fit with this wording, such as discussing challenges I
overcame, social situations I encountered, or other confidence-building
scenarios that were a part of the trip. This is an example of the “Reverse
Engineering” previously discussed.

These phrases make common words sound “nicer” and more refined,
giving finesse to one’s idea expression. For instance, rather than simply
saying “I learned new things”, a more sophisticated choice of words could be
“I acquired a wealth of knowledge”. Similarly, “made new friends” could be
“expanded my social circle”, or “made me feel relaxed” might be “soothed
my stress”. Not only do these phrasings sound better, they are also applicable
for a wide variety of questions. It’s a good idea to think of these phrases as a
fundamental part of devising a coherent, high-scoring response.
 FULL-SCORING TOEFL PHRASES LIST

LEGEND
*underline indicates interchangeable pronouns (my, your, his, her, our, their, etc.) depending on
context

*Verbs can vary, such as original form (V/Vs), continuous (V-ing), past tense (V-ed), etc.
Example: “Achieve/achieves/achieving/achieved greater accomplishments”, depending on context
and sentence structure.

A
1. achieve greater accomplishments (Essay 23)
2. acquire a sea of information/knowledge (Essay 6, 7, 22, 29)
3. acquire a wealth of knowledge/information (Essays 10, 13, 15,
17, 24, 27, 30, 32)
4. adapt to the local culture (Essay 3)
5. an array of… /a rich array of… (Essays 3, 6, 18)
6. ...are commonplace (Essay 8)
7. ...are important foundations of culture (Essay 30)
8. associate with other great minds (Essay 22)

B
1. be a pillar of the community (Essays 27, 32)
2. be an eye-opening experience (Essay 27)
3. become a global citizen (Essay 13)
4. become more obvious on a global scale (Essay 2)
5. be exposed to a rich array of... (Essays 10, 18, 22, 29)
6. be exposed to more fields (Essay 10)
7. be on par with others (Essay 32)
8. boast about our achievements (Essay 23)
9. boost (my) confidence (Essays 7, 23)
10. boost business (Essay 27)
11. boost our metabolism (Essay 12)
12. boost their immune systems (Essays 6, 9, 21, 26)
13. boost their self-esteem (Essay 5)
14. boost their revenue (Essay 20)
15. boost the economy (Essays 4, 8, 27, 32)
16. broaden their horizons (Essays 3,10, 13, 15, 17, 21, 22, 24, 32)

C
1. calm a frantic mind (Essays 9, 34)
2. came in contact with (Essay 13)
3. cater to everyone’s needs /caters to each individual’s needs
(Essays 12, 17)
4. color his life (Essay 21)
5. conquer these diseases (Essay 28)
6. concentrate on the task at hand (Essay 14)
7. create a great first impression (Essay 23)
8. cultivate their potential (Essay 25)
9. cut short by… (Essay 28)

D
1. deny us a sense of security (Essay 24)
2. develop a more global perspective (Essay 13)
3. dive into new territories (Essay 22)
4. do our part (Essay 15)

E
1. eliminate a lot of suffering (Essay 28)
2. engage in multiple activities (Essay 16)
3. enhance X abilities (Essays 19, 22)
4. enhance the possibility (Essay 28)
5. enhance/enrich their interpersonal skills (Essays 6, 22, 25)
6. enhance their stamina (Essays 6, 9, 12, 36)
7. enhance their potential (Essay 5)
8. enhance their living standards (Essay 18)
9. enhance our logic (Essay 26)
10. enjoy a vast multitude of… (Essay 29)
11. enrich family life (Essay 26)
12. enrich my knowledge (Essay 13)
13. establish valuable connections (Essays 10, 18, 27, 32)
14. evaluate their credentials/capabilities (Essays 5, 23)
15. exist in harmony (Essay 31)
16. expand their boundaries (Essay 20)
17. expand their social circle (Essays 1, 3, 9, 10, 13, 16, 18, 19, 21,
22, 26, 27, 29)
18. express desire (Essay 18)
19. extend their careers (Essay 28)
20. extend their lifespans (Essay 6)

F
1. face with adversity (Essay 14)
2. far-reaching impact (Essays 12, 29)
3. find our inner peace (Essay 9)
4. focus on artistic endeavors (Essay 1)
5. foster a sense of (financial) independence (Essay 15)
6. fuel their living expenses (Essays 18, 20)

G
1. gain/get a sense of achievement (Essays 9, 18, 24, 26, 27, 32)
2. gain a sea of knowledge (Essay 26)
3. gain an international perspective (Essay 13)
4. gain a competitive edge (Essays 4, 5, 20, 22, 24)
5. give me fresh perspective (Essay 13)
6. generate more value (Essay 18)
7. get a sense of belonging (Essays 9, 11, 26)
8. get acquainted with their peers (Essay 19)
9. get in touch with our creative side (Essay 1)
10. give us a sense of security (Essay 29)
11. give one peace of mind (Essay 24)
12. go beyond their comfort zone (Essay 7)
13. go against… (Essay 28)
14. government-sponsored… (Essay 12)
15. gravitate towards... (Essay 2)

H
1. has far-reaching impact (Essay 29)
2. help to foster a sense of community (Essay 4)
3. heighten their sociability (Essay 25)
4. hone a sense of independence (Essay 19)
5. hone my social skills (Essay 11)

I
1. indulge in… (Essay 30)
2. immerse ourselves in the local culture (Essays 3, 13, 21, 30)
3. immerse themselves in a vast array of… (Essay 26)
4. improve people's interpersonal skills (Essays 4, 13, 16)
5. indulge ourselves (Essay 3)
6. are like the plague of modern times (Essay 28)
7. ...is the norm (Essay 30)

L
1. land a good job (Essay 23)
2. lack financial foresight (Essay 24)
3. learn valuable life skills (Essays 1, 36)
4. live in harmony (Essay 23)
5. lose competitiveness (Essay 23)
6. lose credibility (Essay 23)
7. lower our cholesterol (Essays 9, 12, 21)

M
1. maintain their heritage (Essay 17)
2. maximize our chances of (Essay 23)
3. mirror a competent and confident boss (Essay 7)
 N
1. nourish his dreams (Essay 27)
2. nurture a sense of responsibility (Essays 8, 27, 32 )

O
1. on a regular basis (Essay 11)
2. open up a whole new world of possibilities (Essays 21, 26)
3. operate as a fine-tuned machine (Essay 31)
4. overcome (such) adversity (Essays 1, 2, 32)
5. overcome massive challenges (Essay 22)

P
1. pay off large dividends in the long-run (Essay 9)
2. polish their networking skills (Essay 9)
3. put everything aside (Essay 21)
4. put a strong emphasis on… (Essay 30)
5. put up with academic pressure (Essays 1, 36)

R
1. reach such levels of fame (Essay 14)
2. realize their potential (Essays 1, 10, 26, 27, 29)
3. rest on their laurels (Essay 7)

S
1. sacrifice their privacy (Essay 14)
2. safeguard our health (Essays 12, 29)
3. sense of well-being (Essays 9, 34)
4. set a deadline (Essay 2)
5. shift one’s focus (Essay 9)
6. show more initiative (Essay 7)
7. showcase his talent (Essays 18, 23)
 8. soothe their daily stress (Essays 5, 12, 13, 16, 26, 29)
9. spark their creativity (Essays 10, 25)
10. spend a lump sum of money (Essay 24)
11. stay in a bubble of complacency (Essay 22)
12. stay in our comfort zone (Essay 27)
13. stimulate their creativity (Essays 13, 26)
14. stimulate their imaginations (Essays 1, 3, 10, 25)
15. strengthen our family bond (Essays 13, 15, 16, 26)
16. strengthen social bonds (Essay 7)
17. strengthen people's connections (Essay 4)
18. strive to… (Essay 22)

T
1. take the lead (Essay 32)

V
1. venture out of the security of routine life (Essay 22)

W
1. weigh the pros and cons (Essay 28)
2. welcome a good challenge (Essay 27)
 7 Full-Scoring Sentence Structures

Proper Sentence Structures are important because they make your ideas
stronger and more convincing. Persuasive arguments show you’ve been
following world events and are well-read and knowledgeable in a variety of
topics. Ideas based on facts and news, presented with grammatically correct
sentence structures automatically creates a solid essay response.

In the event that your word count is too low, incorporating one or more of
these structures can help fill out the essay, adding “meat” to the “bones”.
Furthermore, your wording immediately sounds “correct”, as you should’ve
practiced these forms many times before the actual test. It goes without
saying that having correct grammar avoids getting marks deducted on the
TOEFL test.

As a general strategy, you should spend a lot of time doing practice

writing, familiarizing yourself with the different essay types and how to use
these Sentence Structures in combination with the Themed Vocabulary,
Idioms and Phrases. While practicing your writing, try using several
different structures to answer the same question, which will give you a better
feel for how it fits with your answer. This also lets you see which structures
work best for which topics and essay types. Over time, your responses
become more natural and fluent as you focus on the ideas rather than
worrying about correct grammar.

Unlike the vocabulary, these sentence structures aren’t categorized by

theme or question classification, as they can be used for different essay types
if integrated correctly.

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES LIST

A
1. A beneficial change would be to… (Essay 25)
 2. A famous example of someone... is… (Essay 22)
3. A major driving force for… is… (Essay 18)
4. A recent survey revealed that… (Essay 10)
5. All in all… (Essay 21)
6. Along with this,… (Essays 6, 14)
7. Although..., I think that… (Essay 4)
8. Although..., it has not kept up with… (Essay 8)
9. Although some claim that…, ….disagree. (Essay 2)
10. Although some may argue that… (Essay 29)
11. Another positive aspect to... is that… (Essay 28)
12. As a result,… (Essay 20)
13. As an illustration of this,... (Essays 20, 30)
14. As another example,… (Essay 24)
15. As such,... (Essay 2)
16. As the famous saying goes,... (Essay 11)
17. ...as well as… (Essay 19)
18. At the same time… (Essay 3)
19. ...at the expense of… (Essays 14, 31)

B
1. Because of this,… will be more willing to..., thereby… (Essay 3)
2. Besides,… (Essay 30)

C
1. ...contribute to… (Essay 7)
2. Critics of... contend that… (Essay 14)

D
1. Despite this,… (Essays 19, 27)
2. Despite the benefits of..., I would prefer… (Essay 13)
3. Despite these flaws,… (Essay 17)

E
1. ...enable us to..., while at the same time… (Essay 24)
2. Examples of this include… (Essays 12, 29)
3. Experts claim that… (Essay 28)

F
1. Factors such as… and… contribute to… (Essays 3, 9)
2. First of all,…, and experts argue that… (Essay 2)
3. First of all, it is said that… (Essay 24)
4. For one,…. (Essay 17)
5. Furthermore, one of the pressing problems facing many nations
today is… (Essay 9)
6. Further to this,... (Essay 30)

G
1. Getting involved with... could… (Essay 25)
2. Gone are the days when… (Essays 22, 24, 27)

H
1. ...have aroused public discussion. (Essay 31)
2. Having... better prepared me for… (Essay 13)
3. Having... is a necessary component for… (Essay 7)
4. However, ….is an eventuality. (Essay 17)
5. However, some people bring up the valid point that… (Essay 6)
6. However, that is not to say that… does not have its advantages.
(Essay 13)

I
1. I can’t imagine my life without… (Essay 27)
2. In addition to…, ...we also… (Essay 8)
3. In brief, when..., we have to… (Essay 3)
4. ...include a wide variety of… ranging from... to… to… (Essay 30)
5. In essence,… (Essays 13, 19, 23, 32)
6. In fact, a recent study revealed that… (Essay 12)
7. In light of… (Essay 23)
 8. In order to…, … (Essays 1, 23)
9. In spite of… (Essay 30)
10. In the same vein,… (Essay 9)
11. In this competitive society, the necessity for... seems clear. (Essay
22)
12. In this regard,... (Essay 11)
13. In turn… (Essay 26)
14. I recently read a newspaper article on… (Essay 8)
15. If we want to…, we have to… (Essay 22)
16. ...is directly related to... (Essay 14)
17. It is relatively easier to… (Essay 21)
18. It is widely acknowledged that… (Essays 4, 21, 29)
19. It should come as no surprise to learn that… (Essays 7, 18, 22, 29)
20. It’s undeniable that... (Essay 10)

K
1. Keep in mind that... / We must keep in mind that… (Essays 16, 20)

L
1. Let’s take… as examples. / Let’s take… for example. (Essays 1, 7)

M
1. Moreover, …, thereby… (Essay 8)
2. Most… are under the illusion that… (Essays 26, 31, 32)

N
1. ...necessary to keep the gears of the machine running smoothly.
(Essay 7)
2. Nevertheless,… (Essays 17, 30)
3. No matter how..., we can still... (Essay 4)
4. Not insignificantly,... (Essay 12)
5. ...not only… but also... (Essays 1, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 18, 19, 21,
 22, 23, 24, 29)

O
1. ...offers many…, the first and foremost of which is… (Essays 6, 13,
19, 20, 21, 28)
2. Once…, it also… (Essay 14)
3. On the other hand… (Essays 1, 19, 27)
4. On top of this,… (Essays 12, 29)
5. One has to look no further than… to see... (Essay 20)
6. One important reason is that… (Essay 11)
7. One of the most important traits of a successful… is… (Essay 32)
8. One of the pressing problems facing our nation is… (Essay 25)
9. Only when we are… will we be… (Essay 32)
10. Opponents of this… argue that… (Essay 28)
11. Overall,... (Essay 14)
12. …overcame many obstacles including... and… (Essay 27)

P
1. People who possess... will be more… (Essay 5)
2. Perhaps there’s no better example of... than… (Essays 5, 7, 10, 14,
27, 32)
3. Persistence in the face of adversity is a key requirement during…
(Essay 14)
4. Personal experience has taught me that… (Essays 3, 11, 15, 19, 21,
23, 24, 25)
5. ...puts paramount importance on... (Essay 1)

R
1. Rather than…, …. (Essay 16)
2. Research shows that… (Essay 26)
3. Research shows that there is no correlation between… and...
(Essay 25)

S
1. Second, with… becoming a…, …will be… (Essay 2)
2. ...should not be content with… (Essay 22)
3. ...so having the ability to... is a necessary life skill. (Essay 5)
4. Some people argue that… (Essay 23)
5. Statistical evidence lends support to the view that… (Essay 9)
6. Studies have shown that... (Essay 18)

T
1. The advantages of... far outweigh those of… (Essay 21)
2. The advantages of... more than compensate for the disadvantages.
(Essay 27)
3. The ample evidence presented enables us to reasonably conclude
that.. (Essays 8, 28)
4. The benefit of… is that… (Essay 23)
5. The controversial issue of... still stirs up some negative critics. (Essay
28)
6. The deplorable problem of... has also aroused public concern. (Essay
8)
7. The necessity for... seems clear. (Essays 1,2, 6, 24, 32)
8. The benefits of... far outweigh the perks of… (Essay 19)
9. The... has become part and parcel of our lives and it enables us to…
(Essay 4)
10. The... offers many advantages, the first and foremost of which is...
(Essay 4)
11. The success of… is directly related to… (Essays 7, 22, 25, 27)
12. There are countless benefits that we can gain through... such as...
and… (Essay 9)
13. There are countless examples in the media of… (Essay 24)
14. There are many crucial qualities of… (Essay 15)
15. There are those who believe that… (Essay 24)
16. There are many reasons why… (Essay 18)
17. There is a general debate nowadays about… (Essays 10, 14, 26, 31)
18. There is a worldwide awareness of/that… (Essays 2, 29)
19. There is little doubt that... (Essays 20, 29, 30)
20. There is little doubt that immediate action is required to… (Essays 8,
25)
21. There’s no point in…, it only makes... (Essay 3)
 22. There is no such guarantee… (Essays 31, 32)
23. This also..., which in turn… (Essay 15)
24. This could also include… (Essay 25)
25. This criticism is offset by the fact that… (Essay 20)
26. This demonstrates perfectly how… (Essay 20)
27. This (also) enables... to… (Essays 15, 19)
28. This has caused the phenomenon where… (Essay 25)
29. This, in turn, leads to… (Essay 20)
30. This is evidence that… (Essay 30)
31. This phenomenon is the consequence of… (Essay 8)
32. Those who say that… are not entirely incorrect… (Essay 31)
33. Through maintaining…, ...can… (Essay 5)
34. ...through my personal experience,... (Essay 16)
35. To sum up, although there are advantages of..., the benefits of…
outweigh the drawbacks. (Essays 1,6)
36. To sum up,… far outweighs… (Essay 10)

U
1. Ultimately… (Essay 30)
2. Ultimately, this is what makes a solid… (Essay 10)
3. Unquestionably,…, and one of the pressing problems facing our
Earth today is… (Essay 8)
4. Unquestionably,... (Essay 30)
5. Unquestionably, I strongly believe that… (Essay 22)

W
1. Walking the line between… and… is…. (Essay 23)
2. We are now… (Essays 5, 9)
3. We must keep in mind that... can be a… (Essay 4)
4. We mustn’t lose sight of the fact that… (Essay 8)
5. We should... and... if we want to… (Essay 22)
6. With such arguments, we need to weigh the pros and cons…
(Essay 28)
7. What’s more, nowadays, …as a preferred option to…. (Essay 2)
8. What's more, studies show that… (Essay 6)
 9. When faced with..., …. (Essay 7)
10. When it comes to..., some people prefer/ think that... . Others argue
that...(Essays 1, 13, 19, 21, 24, 27, 28, 30)
11. Whether…. or… (Essay 16)
12. Without a doubt, I strongly believe that… (Essay 26)
13. Without a doubt,... is the best approach. (Essay 3)
14. Without a doubt, it’s preferable to be…. (Essay 24)
15. Without…, ...wouldn’t… (Essay 20)
16. Without..., life would indeed be… (Essay 31)
17. While..., ...also... (Essay 1)
18. While both perspectives have merit, I… (Essays 1, 13, 19, 21)
19. While..., ...does in fact… (Essay 32)
20. While... has its perks, without a doubt, the most important... is
the…(Essay 16)
21. While… is indeed a huge problem right now, people are quite…
(Essay 2)
22. While all of this is indeed true, … (Essay 6)
23. While many people take... for granted, its benefits are truly
innumerable. (Essay 4)
24. While overall we should..., there are many circumstances that
require... in order to… (Essay 23)
25. While some may suggest that..., the reality is that… (Essay 32)
26. While some people may express concerns about…, overall the
advantages of the... far outweigh its disadvantages. (Essay 4)
27. While some people are under the illusion that..., countless examples
show that… (Essay 5)
28. While some people say..., it’s not… (Essay 22)
29. While there are many key qualities of a good..., three of them stand
out as fundamental. (Essay 7)
30. While..., there is debate as to whether… (Essay 11)
31. While there is indeed merit to... (Essay 10)
32. While..., there is still… (Essay 31)
33. With… , ...are also… (Essay 2)
34. With such..., it’s no surprise that… (Essay 11)
35. Without a doubt, …is just as important as... (Essay 1)
36. would be an eye-opening experience and... could take advantage of
all that... has to offer. (Essay 17)
 8 Thematic Vocabulary

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY
One of the key components to better TOEFL writing is organization, so
having a system for organizing your responses is the first step to achieving a
higher score.

An important step in this system is making sure you have a well-rounded

and appropriate Thematic Vocabulary to respond to the wide array of
academic topics covered by the exam. Always keep in mind that your
purpose is to “show your English” with your response. The building blocks of
your response are the varied vocabulary words you’ve studied up to this
point, which are easier to integrate if you have them organized by theme, like
in this section.

These are some of the most common topics for the TOEFL independent
writing responses. When you’re presented with a question related to this
topic, one of the first things you should do is list out topic-appropriate words.
For a full score, you need high-level vocabulary, and you need to use them
correctly. (*Using these words in a grammatically correct way is part of the
earlier sections: Phrases and Sentence Structures. You should practice
including these words into the various other parts of the TIPS system.) As
already mentioned, keep in mind that having a varied and thematically-
organized English vernacular is also extremely useful for responses in the
Speaking section of the test.
FULL-SCORING THEMATIC VOCABULARY
LIST
Business

acquiring
affluent
automotive industry
capital
cash flow
chain
competitiveness
continual innovation
conventional
corporation
corporate welfare
criticism
economic climate
endorsed
enterprise
entities
entrepreneur
expansion
firms
franchise
generate profits
influential
infrastructure
initial hardships
innovation
multinationals
network
nurturing
overtaken
pillar of society
pioneers
pitching
plunge
potential
prestigious
profit
prosperous
rapidly changing society
renowned
reputation
revolutionize
sizeable
social resources
social security
stable
stagnation
subsidize
top-tier
unchecked economic expansion
valid contentions
venture
visionaries
world renowned

City Life

architecture
breathtaking
commute, commuting
congestion
fast-paced society
flexibility
franchise
hectic schedules
houses
infrastructure
landscape architecture
maintenance
metropolitan
mobility
modes of transportation
municipal
old ruins
recreational
traffic congestion
urban center

Computers

download
hacker
hardware
innovation
installation
maintenance
simulation
software
streaming
upload
virus

Crimes

arson
assault
burglary
drinking and driving
drug trafficking
endanger
forgery
fraud
human trafficking
homeland security
kidnap
manslaughter
molest
murder
pickpocket
rape
robbery
scam
scam artist / con artist
suspicious activities
terrorism
theft

Culture

architecture
artistic
artistic appreciation
attire
Confucian values
cuisine
cultural mosaic
custom
distinct
foundations of culture
fusion dishes
global village
heritage
integrating
open-minded
racial discrimination
regional
traits
unique
worldview

Disaster

anticipate
catastrophe
consequence
drought
earthquake
eruption
famine
flood
global warming
hurricane
typhoon
volcanic eruption

Drugs

addictive
cartel
doses
hallucination
opioids
over the counter drugs
overdose
pharmaceutical companies
potent
prescription drugs
side-effects
substance abuse
withdrawal

Education

academia
academic advancement
academic performance
academic pressure
academics
arenas
artistic endeavor
associates
civic pride
competitive edge
Confucian values
counterparts
cram for tests
creativity
cultivate their potential
curriculum
debate
disciplined
diverse
dynamic
education reform
enroll
exam-centric systems
extra-curricular activities
for-profit businesses
hands-on approach
illiteracy rates
information-driven
invaluable
literate/illiterate
mandatory
palate
peer pressure
rote-based curricula/curriculum
routine
scholarly achievement
self-disciplined
semester
strives
superlative
theoretic knowledge
thesis
well-rounded

Employment

administrator
adversity
ambience
assertive
asset
authority
benefits
bonus
career span
career timeline
compensation
competent
competitive
component
corporate culture
counterparts
devoted
disciplined
employable
enterprise
enterprising
entrepreneur
essential
exploit
fulfilling
future prospects
hazards
high-functioning workplace
incentive
innovative
industrious
juggle
keen
negotiate
network
obstacles
one-dimensional
pay-off
paycheck
peers
pension
perks
persevered
persistence
performance anxiety
positive perspective
potential
procrastinate
productive
profitable
promote
resign
self-discipline
shelf-life
strive to
subordinate
supervisor
tedious
traits
unparalleled success
venture
work ethic

Energy

alternative energies
car-pool
combustion
energy consumption
fossil fuels
gasoline
hybrid
nuclear
renewable energy
solar
wind turbines

Environment and Agriculture

agricultural techniques
agricultural use
catastrophe/catastrophic
cattle farming
clear-cut
climate change
contamination
coral reefs
deplete
dispose of
drastic
droughts
eco-friendly
ecological
ecosystem
emission
emissions-free vehicles
eruption
evolution
extinction
famine
farming
flood
foliage
greenhouse gases
global warming
habitats
hygiene issues
impact
improper handling
irrigation
methane gas
Mother Nature
offshore drilling
overfishing
phenomenon
photosynthesis
precipitation
rainforests
reservoir
severe deforestation
smog
species
stewards of the environment
survive
weather fluctuations

Exercise, Sports and Health

aerobics
athletic
boost immune system
calorie intake
crucial
deteriorates
endorse
enhance stamina
exhausting
forward
health-conscious
high profile
hygienic
indolence
key requirement
life expectancy
low/high cholesterol
nutritious meals
obesity rate
peak athletic ability
performance anxiety
prescription drugs
short-sightedness
speed up metabolism
stress inducers

Family and Friends

camaraderie
childhood
chores
circle of friends
cohabitate
couch potatoes
distractions
exposure
family bonding
formative years
focal point
hosting parties
inheritance
interaction with
kin
nurturing
offspring
relatives
sanctuary
sibling
social dynamics
socialize, socializing
spouse
unwind
upbringing

Food

aroma
consumption
cuisine
culinary skills
delicacy
exotic
gourmet
imported
mouth-watering
nutritious
scandal
scrumptious
staple foods
storage
sumptuous
toxic additives

Government, Politics and Corruption

bribery
concession
conducive
diplomacy
homeland security
influential
integrity
reform
scandal
social dynamics
tolerance
transform

Housing

apartment block
insurance
landlord
lease
maintenance
mortgage
property taxes
real estate
renovation
security system
tenant
utility bills
yard

Law and Order

accuse
convict
death penalty
defendant
evidence
guilty
judge
jury
life sentence
offense
plaintiff
prohibit
prosecutor
seize
verdict
witness

Medicine, Illness, and Surgery

afflictions
aggravate
ailments
allergies
Alzheimer’s disease
anesthesia
antibiotics
asthma
augment
bacterial pneumonia
cardiovascular
CAT scans
cervical cancer
chemotherapy
chronic ailments
chronic diseases
complication
conceive
conception stage
conquering disease
contamination
decrepit
defective genes
deteriorate
diabetes
fatal
fertility
foodborne illnesses
forensics
genetic intervention
gurney
hepatitis-b
hereditary conditions
high blood pressure
immediate donor
immunizations
impact
implant
in vitro fertilization
infertile
injection
life expectancy
longevity
medical breakthroughs
micro plastic surgery
miscarriage
mortality rate
nutritionist
obese, obesity
overconsumption
paramedic
Parkinson’s disease
pharmaceutical
plague
plastic surgery
preventative measures
procedure
rabies
readily available
remedied
spoilage
stress-inducers
syphilis
terminal
traumatic injuries
tumor
unethical
vaccines
widely available
wound
x-rays

Military

Air Force
aggression
army (US Army)
artillery
bulletproof
casualty rate
conquest
drones
fighter jets
hierarchy
in the trenches
invasion
Marines
missiles
navy (US Navy)
reinforcement
sniper
soldiers
strategic
tactics
tanks
troops
submarines
warheads

Money and Finance

accumulate wealth
acquiring
adequate
affluence
affluence, affluent
allocate
assets
bankrupt
benefit
budget -conscious
calculative
charity
commodity, commodities
competitive
compound interest
depreciate
distribution channels
dividends
down payment
dynamic
economic incentive
economical
economic-recession
empire
equity
expense
financial crisis
fulfilling
GDP (gross domestic product)
hefty expenses
inflation
innumerable
investment
investments
liability
luxury
millionaire
minimal
obtaining
omnipotent
paid off
prestigious
prosper
prosperity, prosperous
pursuit
scams
self-reliant
self-sufficient
shopaholic
sizeable
squander
stingy vs. generous
stock dividends
subsidy
tele-banking
thrifty
underprivileged
unobtainable
wealth accumulation

Personality

assertive
brutally honest
bucket list
budget-conscious
calculative
conscientious
content
chemistry
circle of friends
compliment
comfort zone
dedication
depressed
diligent
disciplined
encounter
endeavor
excel at
falsehood
first impression
forthright
gratitude
incompetent
intellectually stimulating
milestones
outright deception
persevered
potential
prestigious
reputation
quirks
self-realization
 self-reliant
self-sufficient
shallow
social niceties
strive to
studious
superficial
thrifty
unparalleled success
upbeat
well-respected
well-rounded

Religion

church
holy
mosque
omnipotent
ritual
temple
traditions

Scenery

ambiance
breathtaking
majestic
Mother Nature
picturesque
spectacular

Society and Social Inequity

adulthood
adversity
age gap
associate with
associations
awareness
burden
causes
celebrated as
charities
communication gap
congeniality
conventional
critics
detach
discriminate
distractions
diverse backgrounds
elite
endorse
fast-paced society
general population/public
global village
high profile
impoverish
impoverished community
inappropriate
influential
international perspective
isolated
keenly aware
life-transforming
locale
mainstream
modern
multicultural existence
obstacles
oppress
orphanages
peer pressure
pornographic
positive perspective
poverty-stricken
prejudice
privilege
privileged
rapidly changing society
reinforcement
role models
rural
scrutiny
sensationalized negativity
sociability
social component
social cues
social dynamics
social fabric
social framework
social hub
social stimulation
social structure
stereotype
suicide rates
transform
urban
urban environment
violence
volunteer, volunteering
vulgarity
wage discrepancy
well-rounded
working class
world-renowned

Technology

appliances
efficient
evolution
GPS ( Global Positioning system)
hacking
innovate, innovation
invasion of privacy
leaking of personal information
link into
network
obsolete
online banking/ online shopping
productive
revolutionary
social media platform
social networking sites
surveillance cameras
superlative
technological breakthroughs
technological revolution
technological ventures
unbridled progress

Transportation and Urban Settings

air pollution
autonomous vehicles
carpool
commute, commuters
congestion
contaminants
electric cars
emissions-free vehicles
hybrid cars
infrastructure
logistics
mass transit systems
metropolitan areas
noise pollution
rail transport
rush hour
shipping
smog

Travel and Vacations

adventurous
breathtaking
exhilarating
eye-opening
fond memories
getaways
gratification
hectic schedules
majestic views
metropolitan areas
novelty
picturesque
spectacular
relaxation
renewed vigor
snap pictures
unwinding

Verbs

churn out
collaborate
construct
coordinated
differentiate
diminish
ease
embarks on
enables
encounter
engage in
ensure
flock
houses
implies
incorporating
jeopardize
link into
maneuver
mirror
mitigate
neglected to
nominated
nurtured
offset
opting to
outlast
outweigh
overhaul
overloaded with
pleased with
possess
plummet
pursue
reflect on
remedied
sacrifice
skyrocketing
surge
soar
underscored
utilize

Adjectives/Adverbs

acceptable
accountable
ample
apparent
assorted
attain
considerably
controversial
core
critical
crucial
essential
fascinating
fulfilling
fundamental
fragile
frequent
grueling
horrendous
ideal
intensive
immensely
limitless
massive
mind-blowing
multifunctional
numerous
precise
proactively
progressive
prolific
rapidly
significant
sky-high
subtle
superficial
trivial
unprecedented
vast
versatile
vital
volatile
well-respected
widely available

Nouns

advantages
adversity
ambiance
benefits
chores
circumstances
confidence booster
custom
disadvantages
downsides
drawbacks
era
eventuality
glimpses
interpretation
leisure time
mishaps
modifications
multitude
necessities
negative critics
novelty
obligation
overlap
perks
pursuit
quality
quantity
residents
shortcomings
speculation
substitute
surplus of time
upsides
yardstick

Synonyms for “advantages”

upsides
pros
perks
benefits

Synonyms for “disadvantages”

drawbacks
downsides
cons
shortcomings
setbacks
hindrances
detriments
 9 Idioms
Idioms are colloquial ways of explaining complicated ideas in ways
which are specific to a language and culture. Idioms are found in all
languages, and are expressions or phrases used to convey complex ideas or
concepts using fewer words or imagery. Their figurative meaning often
cannot be understood through a literal translation of each component word,
so proper understanding comes with usage and context.

If a students’ grammar foundation isn’t as advanced as it could be, or if

some ideas are lacking, sometimes an idiom can help to give the essay a
higher standard and make it more interesting. While one shouldn’t rely solely
on idioms as a “saving mechanism” for otherwise poor writing, they should
be considered part of the refinement process for a better essay.

However, idioms should also be used sparingly. Not every essay needs an
idiom, so one can still have a great essay without one. In order to use them
correctly, you need to understand them completely and know under what
context to include them. To help with this, check out the student writing
examples, paying attention to the revised responses and content analysis
sections later in the book.

LEGEND
*underline indicates interchangeable pronouns (my, your, his, her, our, their, etc.) depending on
context

*Verbs can vary, such as original form (V/Vs), continuous (V-ing), past tense (V-ed), etc.
Example: “Bend/bends/bending/bent the truth”, depending on context and sentence structure.

FULL-SCORING TOEFL IDIOMS LIST

A
a double-edged sword (Essays 4, 6)
a friend in need is a friend indeed (Essay 11)
a golden time (Essay 19)
a good character is better than a good fortune (Essay 18)
a hands-on approach (Essay 25)
a household name (Essay 7)
a love-hate relationship (Essay 6)
a smooth sea never made a skilled mariner (Essay 32)
a snowballing effect (Essay 18)

B
bending the truth (Essay 23)
beyond their wildest dreams (Essay 5)
blowing off steam (Essay 9)
break into society (Essays 11, 13)
break into the real world (Essay 19)
breathe easily (Essay 5)
budget conscious (Essays 9, 15)
burned the midnight oil (Essay 15)

C
came out on top (Essay 27)
color their lives (Essay 11)
cutting edge (Essay 20)

E
easier said than done (Essay 32)
eye-opening (Essays 11, 17, 27, 32)

F
fork out (for) (Essay 14)

G
get ahead in life (Essay 24)
getting our foot in the door (Essay 23)
go above and beyond (Essay 32)
grease the social gears (Essay 23)

H
have a good head on one’s shoulders(Essays 1, 15)
heart to heart talk (Essay 16)
hold (something) in high regard (Essay 30)
honesty is the best policy (Essay 23)
hustle and bustle (Essays 13, 16, 21)

I
in the long run (Essays 13, 14, 15, 25)

K
keep an eye on (Essay 4)
keep an open mind (Essay 22)
keep in mind (Essays 9, 21, 24, 27)
keep people on their toes (Essay 9)
keep us company (Essay 19)
knee-jerk reactions (Essay 28)

L
leading the pack (Essay 20)
leave our comfort zone (Essay 32)
live in the moment (Essay 24)
living paycheck to paycheck (Essay 24)
lose sight of…(Essay 8)

M
make hay while the sun shines (Essay 24)
making ends meet (Essays 15, 18, 24)

N
navigating through life (Essay 23)
nip (something) in the bud (Essay 28)
(not) live beyond their means (Essay 19)

O
off the beaten track (Essay 21)
offer a window into…(Essay 30)
out of reach (Essay 24)

P
part and parcel of (Essays 4, 28)
paving the way for (Essay 2)
pay off (Essays 22, 32)
punching a clock (Essay 27)
push boundaries (Essay 32)
pushing the envelope (Essay 22)
putting a dent in our pocket (Essays 9, 21)

R
reaping the benefits of …(essay 29)
release the pressure valve (Essay 19)
remedy the situation (Essay 25)
right around the corner (Essay 24)

S
save money for a rainy day (Essay 24)
sharpen their competitive edge (Essay 18)
shelf-life (Essay 14)
shouldered with the responsibility of…(Essay 2)
soak in the sunshine (Essay 21)
sow the seeds of success (Essay 22)
speaks volumes about… (Essay 30)
started (something) from scratch (Essay 27)
stay on their toes (Essay 20)
stewards of the environment (Essays 2, 8)
strike a balance between (Essay 3)
swimming against the tide (Essay 3)

T
take advantage of (Essays 13, 17)
take for granted (Essays 4, 31)
take in some scenery (Essay 21)
take (something) with a grain of salt (Essay 11)
taken a toll (Essay 8)
the best of both worlds (Essays 1, 10)
the truth hurts (Essay 23)
there is no rose without a thorn (Essay 26)
think outside the box (Essay 20)
trials and tribulations (Essay 32)

U
uphill struggle (Essay 32)

V
variety is the spice of life (Essay 11)

W
walking the line between…(Essay 23)
walks of life (Essays 10, 13, 35)
went above and beyond (Essay 27)
went out on a limb (Essay 27)
when in Rome, do as the Romans do (Essay 3)
 10 Student Writing
The student writing section of this book showcases examples of real
students’ practice writing as they prepared for the TOEFL exam. The essays
are labeled according to question type so that you can better understand the
differences in organizational structure for each category.

ESSAYS 1-13: For each individual essay from 1-13, they are separated
into four parts for better understanding: 1) STUDENT’S VERSION 2)
FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION 3) CONTENT ANALYSIS and 4)
FULL-SCORING FINAL VERSION.

ESSAYS 14-32: Each essay from 14-32 has a 1) STUDENT’S

VERSION 2) FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION and 3) CONTENT
ANALYSIS.

ESSAYS 33-36: These are composite essays made up of component

parts of our TIPS system used to answer questions of a similar topic.
Ultimately, this is what you should aim for when creating your own TOEFL
written responses. You want to be able to “recycle” the core parts of the
system to efficiently and effectively respond to the different question
types.

STUDENT’S VERSION. This section is the student’s initial response to

the question before incorporating any aspects of our TIPS system, so we
have left any spelling, grammar and organizational errors. At this stage, they
have a basic understanding of essay creation, but lack the finesse required for
a better score.

FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION. This part is the revised

response, which is the same essay after it has been re-written following our
TIPS system. Relevant changes have been highlighted in italics, bold,
underlined and explained (in gray highlight) so that you can compare the
original answer to the high-scoring one. This should assist you in applying
the same critical lens to your own essay writing.

Students’ spelling and grammar mistakes were corrected in the revised

versions of these writings. Revisions also made sure the students’ word
counts were not below the ETS official recommendation of 300 words.

CONTENT ANALYSIS. The content analysis details the important

aspects which were added to the final version of the answer. This includes
clear description of the phrases and idioms that were added (under the
heading “FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS”), the way the
vocabulary was inserted into the sentence structures (under the heading
“FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS”), and then an
alphabetized list of the thematic vocabulary from the essay (under the
heading “FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY”).

The “FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS”

section shows a combination of Sentence Structures with Thematic
Vocabulary from this particular topic, demonstrating how you can make
ideas stronger by giving a solid framework to present information. While
practicing your own writing, pay attention to how you can incorporate both of
these elements effectively and seamlessly, as shown in the examples.

FULL-SCORING FINAL VERSION. This is a reiteration of the

revised version, showing how a polished essay looks after being finished with
our system. In essence, it’s how a student’s independent writing should
appear for a full-scoring TOEFL response.

*We have selectively chosen topics that encompass many different

themes on the official test. In other words, the responses in this book could be
adjusted slightly to accommodate other similar questions (in terms of type or
topic) that one encounters on the actual exam. At the end of the “Content
Analysis” section, we included three questions of various types that could
also use similar content for a different response. As extra writing practice,
these questions should be tried using similar TIPS content from the “Full-
Scoring Revised Version” and “Content Analysis” sections of the sample.

For example, a type 1 (open-ended question) such as: “What would you
do if you won the lottery?” could have a response something like “If I won
the lottery, I would travel around the world” (expanded upon with
explanation and details of course). However, you should recognize that a
similar answer could be applied to another type 1 question such as: “What is
your ideal career?” An answer to this could be “I’d be a tour guide so that I
could travel around the world”, for which case you’d use similar organization
structures and vocabulary in your answer. Both answers involve “travel” as
the core response, which could have similar Thematic Vocabulary, Idioms,
Phrases and Sentence Structures. With practice, you’ll begin to see similar
patterns in other questions of the same type.

Remember that these organizational strategies, patterns and vocabulary

will help with spoken responses as well, so time invested in studying them
should include a regular component of speaking practice. Practice speaking
the same way you’re going to write.

LEGEND
To make it easy to understand our system, we’ve shown our essay
corrections in the second section as follows:

1. Sentence structures are underlined.

2. Idioms are in bold and italics.
3. Phrases are in bold and begin with a verb.
4. Thematic Vocabulary are bold.
5. Teacher notes are in gray.
 Q1 STUDENT’S VERSION
Some people think that children should begin their formal education at
a very early age and should spend most of their time on school studies.
Others believe that young children should spend most of their time playing.
Compare these two views. Which view do you agree with? Why? (Type 3
Question)

If children begin their formal education at a very early age, it can help
them to absorb the knowledge. On the other hand, if children spend most of
their time on playing, they will have a happy children’s life.

First of all, as children go to school to study at a very early age, it means

they have to accept the regular courses at an early age. Some people think
that it can help children have a better academic performance than other
countries’ children who don’t accept the formal education at an early age.
Besides, studying in the school can allow children to have a regular life and
they can also learn how to talk with other classmates. Maybe they can adapt
the change of the society in the future.

In addition, if children spend most of their time playing, they don’t have
to put up with the academic pressure too early. They can learn skills and find
their interests by playing. It will find their strong points and even influence
their future. What’s more, there are a variety of playing activities to choose
ranging from LEGO to Wii to soccer. It can develop their learning ability.

For me, I think children don’t have to accept the formal education at a
very early age. We can compare the competition between Asia and North
America. In Asia, we are asked to go to school in 6 years and we have to do
many homework after school so we don’t have time to touch nature. In such a
system, students don’t have innovative thinking, and are less competitive.

To sum up, although there are advantages of accepting the formal

education at an early, there are more benefits to playing as a child.

Word Count: 290

*The student’s original version has a word count of only 290. According to the ETS official
website: “There's no maximum length for your essay, but a good response is usually at least 300
words.” With our TIPS, it is fairly easy to write an outstanding and sophisticated essay with
adequate word count.
 Q1 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION

Some people think that children should begin their formal education at
a very early age and should spend most of their time on school studies.
Others believe that young children should spend most of their time playing.
Compare these two views. Which view do you agree with? Why? (Type 3
Question)

When it comes to raising and educating children, some people think that
formal education should begin as early as possible. Others argue that more
time should be spent playing. Without a doubt, a childhood spent playing
allows the best of both worlds, as playing and socializing is just as important
an aspect as absorbing academic knowledge in a child’s life.
(Type 3 Question Introduction: we changed the introduction to better reflect a proper answer to
a Type 3 question: reworded the question, clearly stated a preference. We added in SENTENCE
STRUCTURES and an IDIOM for better flow.)

First of all, as children go to school to study at a very early age, they have
to accept a regular course schedule and routine. Some people think that it can
help children to have better academic performance than students of other
countries. Furthermore, many believe that this exam-centric system makes a
person more employable in the future. In Asia, for example, parents believe
this type of academic approach gives children a competitive edge. The
society here puts paramount importance on academic advancement. The
goal of most Asian parents and teachers is to churn out literate, disciplined
workers for factories and offices.
(Type 3 Question Body Paragraph 1: stated viewpoint “A” in the first body paragraph,
reinforced with a social example. SENTENCE STRUCTURES made the language clearer, and
added VOCABULARY made it more engaging.)

On the other hand, if children spend most of their time playing, they don’t
have to put up with academic pressure too early, and they can learn
valuable life skills and realize their potential and interests through playing.
For instance, when children play sports such as basketball and soccer, they
can make friends, learn responsibility, and overcome adversity. It helps
children not only to stimulate their imaginations but also to expand their
social circle. There are multiple ways to learn important skillsets through
socializing, including playing chess, X-Box or even rollerblading with
friends.
(Type 3 Question Body Paragraph 2: stated viewpoint “B” in the second body paragraph to
show a balanced understanding of the topic. Use of our PHRASES and SENTENCE
STRUCTURES gave a stronger, well-rounded expression of the viewpoint.)

While both perspectives have merit, I think children shouldn’t solely

focus on formal education at a very early age. Let’s take North America and
Asia as examples. While a rote-based curricula is an important part of
scholarly achievement in Asian countries, we also don’t focus on artistic
endeavors and get in touch with our creative side. As a result, the
innovation and creativity one learns while playing are often lacking, making
us less competitive with countries like the U.S. In order to have a good head
on one’s shoulders, proper balance is needed. The most innovative and
widely-used products such as Apple or Amazon were developed in
environments which highly value creative thought.
(Type 3 Question Body Paragraph 3: stated preference for viewpoint “B”, giving a real-world
example to strengthen the argument. Expressing this idea with proper SENTENCE STRUCTURES
comes across as a stronger, more academic discussion.)

To sum up, although there are advantages of accepting formal education

at an early age, the benefits of children spending more time playing when
they are young still outweigh the drawbacks. The necessity for extra-
curricular activities seems clear.
(Type 3 Question Conclusion: the conclusion is reformed with better SENTENCE
STRUCTURES, and finishes with a strong, well-expressed statement to wrap up.)

Word Count: 407

 Q1 CONTENT ANALYSIS

FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. expand their social circle

2. focus on artistic endeavors
3. get in touch with our creative side
4. learn valuable life skills
5. overcome adversity
6. put up with academic pressure
7. realize their potential
8. stimulate their imaginations
9. “have a good head on one’s shoulders”
10. “the best of both worlds”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. When it comes to raising and educating children, some people think

that formal education should begin as early as possible. Others
argue that more time should be spent playing.
2. Without a doubt, a childhood spent playing allows the best of both
worlds, as playing and socializing is just as important an aspect as
absorbing academic knowledge in a child’s life.
3. The society here puts paramount importance on academic
advancement.
4. On the other hand, if children spend most of their time playing,
they don’t have to put up with academic pressure too early, and
they can learn valuable life skills and realize their potential and
interests through playing.
5. It helps children not only to stimulate their imaginations but also
to expand their social circle.
6. While both perspectives have merit, I think children shouldn’t
solely focus on formal education at a very early age.
7. Let’s take North America and Asia as examples. While a rote-
 based curricula is an important part of scholarly achievement in
Asian countries, we also don’t focus on artistic endeavors and get
in touch with our creative side.
8. In order to have a good head on one’s shoulders, proper balance is
needed.
9. To sum up, although there are advantages of accepting formal
education at an early age, the benefits of children spending more
time playing when they are young still outweigh the drawbacks.
10. The necessity for extra-curricular activities seems clear.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. academic
9. employable
advancement
10. exam-centric system
2. academic pressure
11. extra-curricular activities
3. artistic endeavors
12. innovation
4. childhood
13. literate
5. churn out
14. rote-based curricula
6. competitive edge
15. routine
7. creativity
16. scholarly achievement
8. disciplined

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. Some people say that physical exercise should be a required part of
every school day. Others believe that students should spend the whole school
day on academic studies. Which opinion do you agree with? Include details
and examples in your explanation. (Type 2 Question)

Q2. Some parents advocate that children attend formal education at a

school. Others parents prefer to home-school their children. Which do you
think is better and why? (Type 2 Question)

Q3. Some people believe that it is important for children to learn at least
one musical instrument. Others think that it is unnecessary. What is your
opinion and why? (Type 2 Question)
 Q1 FULL-SCORING FINAL VERSION
Some people think that children should begin their formal education at
a very early age and should spend most of their time on school studies.
Others believe that young children should spend most of their time playing.
Compare these two views. Which view do you agree with? Why? (Type 3
Question)

When it comes to raising and educating children, some people think that
formal education should begin as early as possible. Others argue that more
time should be spent playing. Without a doubt, a childhood spent playing
allows the best of both worlds, as playing and socializing is just as important
an aspect as absorbing academic knowledge in a child’s life.

First of all, as children go to school to study at a very early age, they have
to accept a regular course schedule and routine. Some people think that it can
help children to have better academic performance than students of other
countries. Furthermore, many believe that this exam-centric system makes a
person more employable in the future. In Asia, for example, parents believe
this type of academic approach gives children a competitive edge. The
society here puts paramount importance on academic advancement. The
goal of most Asian parents and teachers is to churn out literate, disciplined
workers for factories and offices.

On the other hand, if children spend most of their time playing, they don’t
have to put up with academic pressure too early, and they can learn
valuable life skills and realize their potential and interests through playing.
For instance, when children play sports such as basketball and soccer, they
can make friends, learn responsibility, and overcome adversity. It helps
children not only to stimulate their imaginations but also to expand their
social circle. There are multiple ways to learn important skillsets through
socializing, including playing chess, X-Box or even rollerblading with
friends.

While both perspectives have merit, I think children shouldn’t solely

focus on formal education at a very early age. Let’s take North America and
Asia as examples. While a rote-based curricula is an important part of
scholarly achievement in Asian countries, we also don’t focus on artistic
endeavors and get in touch with our creative side. As a result, the
innovation and creativity one learns while playing are often lacking, making
us less competitive with countries like the U.S. In order to have a good head
on one’s shoulders, proper balance is needed. The most innovative and
widely-used products such as Apple or Amazon were developed in
environments which highly value creative thought.

To sum up, although there are advantages of accepting formal education

at an early age, the benefits of children spending more time playing when
they are young still outweigh the drawbacks. The necessity for extra-
curricular activities seems clear.

Word Count: 407

 Q2 STUDENT’S VERSION
In twenty years, there will be fewer cars in use than there are today. Do
you agree or disagree with this statement? (Type 4 Question)

Car is one of the most significant inventions during the twenty century.
However, with the progress of the technology and the changing living habits
of the citizens in cities, there will be fewer cars in use than there are today.
Here is why.

We are facing a serious energy problem today, and we will run out of
fossil fuel in a few decades. The price of gasoline will increase and the
replacement of energy will be found. The new hybrid or electric cars will be
invented but they still can't offer the demand of everyone. It will cause the
numbers of the car drop.

Second, the infrastructure will be much completed, and the public

transportation such as metro system or bus track will be constructed through
the entire city to suburban area. People will tend to take the public
transportation due to its cheap price and efficiency. In addition the expensive
real estate also make the parking lot unavailable and parking fee to be much
expensive. Citizens also change their mind that walking will beneficial for
their health.

Finally, the environment awareness will be raised due to the serious

problem of greenhouse gases. The research did by the ecology scholars have
shown that the first green house producer is the industry, and the second is
the cars. The car industry has already tried to find a new solution for
transporting people from one point to another ecologically. For example, the
Honda U3-X is a new type of transportation driven by electricity. In addition,
It's not a four-wheel car. Instead, it has only one-wheel for the individual
commuters. I believe that such kind of new transportation will become
dominant and replace the car gradually.

In sum, although car will not totally be gone, it will be less and less
because it has brought many environment problems. However, we can expect
the scientists will come out new solutions for transportations which are
environmental friendly and available for individuals.

Word Count: 326

 Q2 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION
In twenty years, there will be fewer cars in use than there are today. Do
you agree or disagree with this statement? (Type 4 Question)

The car is one of the most significant inventions of the twentieth century.
However, with progress in technology and the changing habits of people in
metropolitan areas, in 20 years there will be fewer cars in use than there are
today.
(Type 4 Question Introduction: we rephrased the question, then stated a clear position on the
topic).

First of all, energy consumption is a serious problem, and experts argue

that we are going to run out of fossil fuels in the coming decades. Gasoline
prices will surge and we will need alternative energy sources. New hybrid
or electric cars are being invented but the extreme expense of these new
technologies won’t be accessible to the mass public and overall increasing
population. In addition, skyrocketing real estate prices have also caused
parking fees to soar, so many citizens are going to choose to carpool to
avoid traffic problems. The high costs will cause the number of the cars on
the road to plummet. What’s more, nowadays, citizens are gravitating
towards convenient services such as Lyft or Uber, opting to use ride-sharing
and app-accessible transportation as a preferred option to the expensive
choice of vehicle ownership.
(Type 4 Question Body Paragraph 1: this paragraph gives the first reason to support the
student’s choice: energy consumption and population issues. We changed the logic of the argument
from a “lack of supply of cars” to an “increased cost” issue. Stronger VOCABULARY was added,
as well as SENTENCE STRUCTURES. A real-world example of ride sharing apps is a good
example to support this view.)

Second, with greater environmental awareness becoming a societal

norm, infrastructure will be expanded to account for newer and greener
transportation demands. Public systems such as metros or bus lanes are
continually being constructed throughout entire cities, including into
suburban areas. As such, people are more likely to favor public transportation
due to its decreased ecological impact and convenience. With extreme
weather patterns becoming more obvious on a global scale, commuters are
also becoming shouldered with the responsibility of being stewards of the
environment.
 (Type 4 Question Body Paragraph 2: this paragraph explains the second reason to support this
argument- increased environmental awareness and expanded infrastructure. Added SENTENCE
STRUCTURES and topical VOCABULARY to make the analysis more academic.)

Although some claim that environmental issues are just being

exaggerated by the media, leading scientists and academics disagree. There is
a growing worldwide environmental awareness of the detrimental effects of
greenhouse gases and climate change. Recent news stories have described
how many countries around the world have set a deadline for ending
production of gasoline powered cars. This is paving the way for major
automobile manufacturers to make a shift from conventional vehicles to fully
electric modes of transportation. I believe that this kind of new
transportation is going to become dominant and quickly replace old
technology within my lifetime. While the environment is indeed a huge
problem right now, people are quite innovative in their ability to overcome
such adversity.
(Type 4 Question Body Paragraph 3: this paragraph gives a third reason to support this POV: it
shows an understanding of other stances, but uses a refutation to strengthen own view. We changed
the social example to reflect an understanding of global issues, which ties in better with the overall
argument.)

In sum, although cars will not become totally obsolete, they will certainly
decrease in numbers because of cost issues and their detrimental effects on
the environment. The necessity for new modes of transportation, carpooling,
and a change of mindset seems clear.
(Type 4 Question Conclusion: we quickly reiterated key points and gave a general summary,
strengthened by solid SENTENCE STRUCTURES.)

Word Count: 423

Q2 CONTENT ANALYSIS

FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. gravitating towards
2. becoming more obvious on a global scale
3. set a deadline
4. overcome such adversity
5. “paving the way for”
6. “shouldered with the responsibility of…”
7. “stewards of the environment”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. First of all, energy consumption is a serious problem, and experts

argue that we are going to run out of fossil fuels in the coming
decades.
2. What’s more, nowadays, citizens are gravitating towards convenient
services such as Lyft or Uber, opting to use ride-sharing and app-
accessible transportation as a preferred option to the expensive
choice of vehicle ownership.
3. Second, with greater environmental awareness becoming a societal
norm, infrastructure will be expanded to account for newer and
greener transportation demands.
4. As such, people are more likely to favor public transportation due to
its decreased ecological impact and convenience.
5. With extreme weather patterns becoming more obvious on a global
scale, commuters are also becoming shouldered with the
responsibility of being stewards of the environment.
6. Although some claim that environmental issues are just being
exaggerated by the media, leading scientists and academics disagree.
7. There is a growing worldwide environmental awareness of the
detrimental effects of greenhouse gases and climate change.
8. This is paving the way for major automobile manufacturers to make a
shift from conventional vehicles to fully electric modes of
transportation.
 9. While the environment is indeed a huge problem right now, people
are quite innovative in their ability to overcome such adversity.
10. In sum, although cars will not become totally obsolete, they will
certainly decrease in numbers because of cost issues and their
detrimental effects on the environment.
11. The necessity for new modes of transportation, carpooling, and a
change of mindset seems clear.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. car pool 9. modes of transportation

2. dominant 10. obsolete
3. energy consumption 11. opting to
4. fossil fuels 12. plummet
5. gasoline 13. significant
6. hybrid 14. skyrocketing
7. infrastructure 15. soar
8. metropolitan areas 16. surge

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. Some say that the automobile is the ultimate symbol of personal
freedom. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? (Type 4 Question)

Q2. Does the automobile come with more benefits or drawbacks?

Compare and contrast the benefits and drawbacks and state which you prefer
and why. (Type 3 Question)

Q3. Describe the most efficient transportation in your country. Why do

you think it’s the most efficient? Include details and examples to support
your explanation. (Type 1 Question)
 Q2 FULL-SCORING FINAL VERSION
In twenty years, there will be fewer cars in use than there are today. Do
you agree or disagree with this statement? (Type 4 Question)

The car is one of the most significant inventions of the twentieth century.
However, with progress in technology and the changing habits of people in
metropolitan areas, in 20 years there will be fewer cars in use than there are
today.

First of all, energy consumption is a serious problem, and experts argue

that we are going to run out of fossil fuels in the coming decades. Gasoline
prices will surge and we will need alternative energy sources. New hybrid
or electric cars are being invented but the extreme expense of these new
technologies won’t be accessible to the mass public and overall increasing
population. In addition, skyrocketing real estate prices have also caused
parking fees to soar, so many citizens are going to choose to carpool to
avoid traffic problems. The high costs will cause the number of the cars on
the road to plummet. What’s more, nowadays, citizens are gravitating
towards convenient services such as Lyft or Uber, opting to use ride-sharing
and app-accessible transportation as a preferred option to the expensive
choice of vehicle ownership.

Second, with greater environmental awareness becoming a societal

norm, infrastructure will be expanded to account for newer and greener
transportation demands. Public systems such as metros or bus lanes are
continually being constructed throughout entire cities, including into
suburban areas. As such, people are more likely to favor public transportation
due to its decreased ecological impact and convenience. With extreme
weather patterns becoming more obvious on a global scale, commuters are
also becoming shouldered with the responsibility of being stewards of the
environment.

Although some claim that environmental issues are just being

exaggerated by the media, leading scientists and academics disagree. There is
a growing worldwide environmental awareness of the detrimental effects of
greenhouse gases and climate change. Recent news stories have described
how many countries around the world have set a deadline for ending
production of gasoline powered cars. This is paving the way for major
automobile manufacturers to make a shift from conventional vehicles to fully
electric modes of transportation. I believe that this kind of new
transportation is going to become dominant and quickly replace old
technology within my lifetime. While the environment is indeed a huge
problem right now, people are quite innovative in their ability to overcome
such adversity.

In sum, although cars will not become totally obsolete, they will certainly
decrease in numbers because of cost issues and their detrimental effects on
the environment. The necessity for new modes of transportation, carpooling,
and a change of mindset seems clear.

Word Count: 423

 Q3 STUDENT’S VERSION
When people move to another country, some of them decide to follow
the customs of the new country. Others prefer to keep their own customs.
Compare these two choices. Which one do you prefer? Support your
answer with specific details. (Type 3 Question)

Without a doubt, following the customs of the new country can help us to
adapt the local environment. On the other hand, if we can keep our own
customs, it can help us to reduce homesick. Both of the two ways have its
advantage.

First of all, if we decide to follow the customs of the new country, we can
easily try new culture. Because of our friendly behavior, the local residents
will be more willing to help us or chat with us so that we can make new
friends and we are free of racism or gap. Besides, as we open our mind to
accept the local customs, it’s easier for us to adapt the new environment.

In addition, when we move to another country, there are advantages to

keep our own customs. Keeping our own cultures can take different customs
to the new country in order that there are many different cultures and we can
call it melting-pot. When a country has multiple cultures, people in the
country can touch different customs so that it can help local people to try new
things and think from other viewpoint. At the same time, we can take our
original cuisines to the new country.

For me, I will choose to follow the customs of the new country.
However, it not means that we have to give up our own customs totally. We
can still keep our own cultures. For example, we can have our own festival
such as Moon cake festival and Chinese lunar New Year. We can also share
our own local cuisine to others. In other words, to be like a local, we should
follow the new customs of the new country, but we can use other ways to
keep our own customs.

In brief, studies show that if someone can let himself follow the customs
in the new country, he can have better performance on his jobs because he
will not spend too much time on complaining about the differences between
different countries so that he can be more concentrate on his works.

Word Count: 346

 Q3 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION
When people move to another country, some of them decide to follow
the customs of the new country. Others prefer to keep their own customs.
Compare these two choices. Which one do you prefer? Support your
answer with specific details. (Type 3 Question)

When one moves to a new country, there is the choice to follow new
customs or adhere to the old ones, both of which have advantages. Without a
doubt, following the customs of the new country is the best approach.
(Type 3 Question Introduction: we restated/reframed/rephrased the question, and clearly stated
a preference for one point of view. Although students can discuss both sides of the argument in the
body paragraphs, the introduction should be straightforward and focussed.)

First of all, if we decide to follow the customs of the new country, we can
easily immerse ourselves in the local culture. Because of this accepting and
friendly behavior, the local residents will be more willing to help us or chat
with us, thereby expanding our social circle. It’s also more likely to help us
avoid racial discrimination. Factors such as open-mindedness and
acceptance of the local customs contribute to easier assimilation into the
new environment. Personal experience has taught me that friendliness and
acceptance leads to more personal growth and overall positivity. For instance,
when I was in New York last summer, I learned local slang, attended local art
festivals, and did my best to fit into the thriving international social scene.
(Type 3 Question Body Paragraph 1: we stated the benefits of choice A, and added personal
example to support the claims made with the PHRASES.)

However, when we move to another country, there are advantages to

keeping our own customs as well. If every ethnicity keeps some aspects of its
own culture, the country will be a colorful cultural mosaic. When a country
has multiple cultures, people in the country can experience different customs
and they can broaden their horizons and stimulate their imaginations. At
the same time, we can indulge ourselves in an array of mouth-watering
cuisine from around the globe. For example, we can enjoy Indian curry,
Japanese sashimi, and Mexican burritos.
(Type 3 Question Body Paragraph 2: we stated the benefits of choice B without contradicting
the other viewpoint. Real-world examples of various cuisine added to the writing.)

For me, I would choose to follow the customs of the new country because
it is often said “when in Rome, do as the Romans do.” However, it doesn’t
mean that we have to give up our own customs entirely. We can still keep
important elements of our own cultures. For example, we can still celebrate
our own festivals such as the Moon Cake Festival and Chinese Lunar New
Year, or create fusion dishes with our imported cuisine. In other words, to
immerse ourselves in and adapt to the local culture, we should follow the
new customs of the new country, but we can also find other ways to keep
elements of our own customs.
(Type 3 Question Body Paragraph 3: we clearly stated a preference, and mentioned more
benefits to this choice not mentioned in the first body paragraph. We briefly mentioned aspects of
the opposite choice to show a balanced perspective, which strengthened our own argument overall.)

In brief, when making a major life change like moving to a new country,
we have to strike a balance between giving up the old and integrating with
the new. There’s no point in swimming against the tide, it only makes a
person tired.
(Type 3 Question Conclusion: we reiterated that there are pros and cons to both approaches,
and restated our preference in answer to the initial question. Choice “A” overall outweighs choice
“B”. In this case, we reworded the conclusion because it went off course by adding new examples.
We added two IDIOMS to add to the perspective and to properly summarize.)

Word Count: 411

Q3 CONTENT ANALYSIS

FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. assimilation into
2. broaden their horizons
3. expanding our social circle
4. immerse ourselves in and adapt to the local culture
5. indulge ourselves
6. stimulate their imaginations
7. “when in Rome, do as the Romans do.”
8. “strike a balance between”
9. “...swimming against the tide...”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. When one moves to a new country, there is the choice to follow new
customs or adhere to the old ones, both of which have advantages.
Without a doubt, following the customs of the new country is the
best approach.
2. Because of this accepting and friendly behavior, the local residents
will be more willing to help us or chat with us, thereby expanding
our social circle.
3. Factors such as open-mindedness and acceptance of the local
customs contribute to easier assimilation into the new environment.
4. Personal experience has taught me that friendliness and acceptance
leads to more personal growth and overall positivity.
5. At the same time, we can indulge ourselves in an array of mouth-
watering cuisine from around the globe.
6. In brief, when making a major life change like moving to a new
country, we have to strike a balance between giving up the old and
integrating with the new.
7. There’s no point in swimming against the tide, it only makes a
person tired.
 FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

6. mouth-watering cuisine
1. assimilation into
2. cultural mosaic 7. open-mindedness
3. elements 8. racial discrimination
4. fusion dishes 9. social scene
5. integrating 10. thriving

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. You are planning to study abroad. Compare and contrast what you
think you will like and dislike about your circumstances there. (Type 3
Question)

Q2. Describe an experience of culture shock. How did you handle it and
what did you learn from it? (Type 1 Question)

Q3. You are immigrating to a new country. Will you keep your birth
name or use a new name? (Type 2 Question)
 Q3 FULL-SCORING FINAL VERSION
When people move to another country, some of them decide to follow
the customs of the new country. Others prefer to keep their own customs.
Compare these two choices. Which one do you prefer? Support your
answer with specific details. (Type 3 Question)

When one moves to a new country, there is the choice to follow new
customs or adhere to the old ones, both of which have advantages. Without a
doubt, following the customs of the new country is the best approach.

First of all, if we decide to follow the customs of the new country, we can
easily immerse ourselves in the local culture. Because of this accepting and
friendly behavior, the local residents will be more willing to help us or chat
with us, thereby expanding our social circle. It’s also more likely to help us
avoid racial discrimination. Factors such as open-mindedness and
acceptance of the local customs contribute to easier assimilation into the
new environment. Personal experience has taught me that friendliness and
acceptance leads to more personal growth and overall positivity. For instance,
when I was in New York last summer, I learned local slang, attended local art
festivals, and did my best to fit into the thriving international social scene.

However, when we move to another country, there are advantages to

keeping our own customs as well. If every ethnicity keeps some aspects of its
own culture, the country will be a colorful cultural mosaic. When a country
has multiple cultures, people in the country can experience different customs
and they can broaden their horizons and stimulate their imaginations. At
the same time, we can indulge ourselves in an array of mouth-watering
cuisine from around the globe. For example, we can enjoy Indian curry,
Japanese sashimi, and Mexican burritos.

For me, I would choose to follow the customs of the new country because
it is often said “when in Rome, do as the Romans do.” However, it doesn’t
mean that we have to give up our own customs entirely. We can still keep
important elements of our own cultures. For example, we can still celebrate
our own festivals such as the Moon Cake Festival and Chinese Lunar New
Year, or create fusion dishes with our imported cuisine. In other words, to
immerse ourselves in and adapt to the local culture, we should follow the
new customs of the new country, but we can also find other ways to keep
elements of our own customs.

In brief, when making a major life change like moving to a new country,
we have to strike a balance between giving up the old and integrating with
the new. There’s no point in swimming against the tide, it only makes a
person tired.

Word Count: 411

 Q4 STUDENT’S VERSION
Which invention in the past century do you think is the most important:
a) the airplane; b) the telephone; c) the automobile (Type 1 Question)

For me, I think telephone is the most important thing which was invented
in the past century.

First of all, telephones strength people's connection, no matter how far the
distence is between each other, we can still keep in touch. It improoved
people's social skill, also more easy to have a healthy relationship. Second,
telephones may give us more informations from the whole world. We can get
news by telephones when things just happened, such as if someone needs
help, we can go save him immdiately. As a result, telephones may reduce the
death rates of the world.

However, there are some disadvantages of telephones which we might be

tapped by goverment. Goverment can use telephones to listen is there any
dangrous in the nation. Therefore, it actually keep our country or hometown
security. It can prevant worse things happaned and make people's life become
safer.

To sum up, there are so many advantages of telephones, that lead our
lives better a lot than used to be. It definetly is the most important invention
in the past century.

Word Count: 178

*The student’s original version has a word count of only 178. According to the ETS official
website: “There's no maximum length for your essay, but a good response is usually at least 300
words.” With our TIPS, it is fairly easy to write an outstanding and sophisticated essay with
adequate word count.
 Q4 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION

Which invention in the past century do you think is the most important:
a) the airplane; b) the telephone; c) the automobile (Type 1 Question)

Although there have been many great inventions over the past century, I
think that the telephone has had the biggest impact.
(Type 1 Question Introduction: the introduction should state your opinion, using proper
grammar and SENTENCE STRUCTURES.)

The telephone offers many advantages, the first and foremost of which is
strengthening people's connections. No matter how far the distance is
between one another, we can still keep in touch. It has helped to improve
people's interpersonal skills and helped to foster a sense of community.
By staying in touch via the telephone, information became more accessible
and social dynamics changed on many levels. For example, the way in which
meetings or parties were arranged became far more convenient and
immediate.
(Type 1 Question Body Paragraph 1: the addition of our SENTENCE STRUCTURES and
PHRASES immediately created a stronger sounding response. We limited the number of examples
to stay focused on the importance of “communication”, and adding a social example made a better
argument. Spelling and basic grammar have been cleaned up as well.)

By reducing the need to travel to communicate, the telephone also had a

massive impact on economic activities around the world. Boosting the
economy with such an invention is unquestionable. Companies that could
communicate quickly naturally gained a competitive edge over competitors.
One could purchase commodities via the telephone or engage in various
business deals without having to travel. One example of this is the adoption
of tele-banking to manage one’s assets and investments.
(Type 1 Question Body Paragraph 2: the initial student essay was lacking in larger
understanding, so we added the idea of “economics” to broaden the scope of the answer. This
paragraph demonstrates strong use of SENTENCE STRUCTURES, PHRASES and THEMED
VOCABULARY.

While some people may express concerns about privacy with this
technology, overall the advantages of the telephone far outweigh its
disadvantages. We must keep in mind that any technology can be a double-
edged sword. In a positive way, the government can use telephones to keep
an eye on suspicious activities that may endanger the nation. Therefore, this
actually keeps our homeland security safe. It can prevent terrorism,
kidnappings, government corruption, scams, and drug trafficking from
happening. What’s more, if someone requires urgent medical assistance, we
can dial 911 immediately. It is widely acknowledged that the telephone has
reduced casualty rates throughout the world.
(Type 1 Question Body Paragraph 3: we kept the student’s example of “safety” and “emergency
calls” from the initial essay, but filled it out to make it more comprehensive. All elements of our
TIPS system are here: THEMED VOCABULARY, IDIOMS, PHRASES, and SENTENCE
STRUCTURES.)

While many people take the invention of the telephone for granted, its
benefits are truly innumerable. The telephone has become part and parcel
of our lives and it enables us to have a better quality of life. Unquestionably,
it is the most important invention in the past century.
(Type 1 Question Conclusion: we rephrased the question to show an understanding of its
meaning, and added more extensive statements to show a deeper comprehension of the topic. This
conclusion is a good example of how our TIPS can really enhance one’s writing and increase the
word count to an acceptable level.)

Word Count: 329

Q4 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. strengthen people's connections

2. improved people's interpersonal skills
3. helped to foster a sense of community
4. boosting the economy
5. gained a competitive edge
6. “double-edged sword”
7. “keep an eye on”
8. “part and parcel of”
9. “take for granted”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. Although there have been many great inventions over the past
century, I think that the telephone has had the biggest impact.
2. The telephone offers many advantages, the first and foremost of
which is strengthening people's connections.
3. No matter how far the distance is between one another, we can still
keep in touch.
4. While some people may express concerns about privacy with this
technology, overall the advantages of the telephone far outweigh its
disadvantages.
5. We must keep in mind that any technology can be a double-edged
sword.
6. It is widely acknowledged that the telephone has reduced casualty
rates throughout the world.
7. While many people take the invention of the telephone for granted,
its benefits are truly innumerable.
8. The telephone has become part and parcel of our lives and it enables
us to have a better quality of life.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. assets
 2. casualty rate 9. investments
3. commodities 10. kidnappings
4. drug trafficking 11. scams
5. endanger 12. social dynamics
6. government corruption 13. suspicious activities
7. homeland security 14. tele-banking
8. innumerable 15. terrorism

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. In your opinion, what is the most important invention within the last
20 years? (Type 1 Question)

Q2. Is the television a blessing or a curse? Explain your reasons. (Type 2

Question)

Q3. The internet is a double-edged sword. Do you agree or disagree with

this statement? (Type 4 Question)
 Q4 FULL-SCORING FINAL VERSION
Which invention in the past century do you think is the most important:
a) the airplane; b) the telephone; c) the automobile (Type 1 Question)

Although there have been many great inventions over the past century, I
think that the telephone has had the biggest impact.

The telephone offers many advantages, the first and foremost of which is
strengthening people's connections. No matter how far the distance is
between one another, we can still keep in touch. It has helped to improve
people's interpersonal skills and helped to foster a sense of community.
By staying in touch via the telephone, information became more accessible
and social dynamics changed on many levels. For example, the way in which
meetings or parties were arranged became far more convenient and
immediate.

By reducing the need to travel to communicate, the telephone also had a

massive impact on economic activities around the world. Boosting the
economy with such an invention is unquestionable. Companies that could
communicate quickly naturally gained a competitive edge over competitors.
One could purchase commodities via the telephone or engage in various
business deals without having to travel. One example of this is the adoption
of tele-banking to manage one’s assets and investments.

While some people may express concerns about privacy with this
technology, overall the advantages of the telephone far outweigh its
disadvantages. We must keep in mind that any technology can be a double-
edged sword. In a positive way, the government can use telephones to keep
an eye on suspicious activities that may endanger the nation. Therefore, this
actually keeps our homeland security safe. It can prevent terrorism,
kidnappings, government corruption, scams, and drug trafficking from
happening. What’s more, if someone requires urgent medical assistance, we
can dial 911 immediately. It is widely acknowledged that the telephone has
reduced casualty rates throughout the world.

While many people take the invention of the telephone for granted, its
benefits are truly innumerable. The telephone has become part and parcel
of our lives and it enables us to have a better quality of life. Unquestionably,
it is the most important invention in the past century.

Word Count: 329

 Q5 STUDENT’S VERSION
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Because
modern life is very complex, it is essential for young people to have the
ability to plan and organize. (Type 4 Question)

Nowadays, the world is changing enormously with the diversity of ideas

and concepts. Standard of living is also ameliorating. In order to do that,
people are continuously forming new concepts and strategies for their ability
to plan and organize. As a result, it is essential for the numbers of young
people to improve not only the skill of managing their time schedule but also
the responsibility of facing failures.

First at all, the time management is one of the significant elements of our
daily life. For example, students always attend to various campus activities
during their student career such as research projects, semester exams, social
activities and so on. Young people who arrange the schedule and follow the
step to accomplish the assignments can perform professionally in every part
of their school affairs than others who may turn out to be jack of all trades,
but master of none without planning. Moreover, young people can boost their
self-esteem and soothe daily stress by excellent time controlling skill. For
instance, people express their behaviors more unflappably so that they will
not miss the details when they conduct the tasks. Therefore, they can gain a
sense of achievement easier and become more confidence to cope with
everything in the future.

In addition, because the society is extremely competitive nowadays, the

capability of responsible is also important for everyone. Young people need
to to solve the problems better. For example, to be an excellent leader who
alway keeps the reliable attitude and can build the rules and establish the
great trust with others in a group. Hence, to be a successful person who
accepts the failures and overcomes the frustrations believe that practice
makes perfect so that they always try their best and practice more hardly. For
instance, the famous NBA player called Septhen Curry always showcases his
perfect talent of three points shot and being a good leader in the game. A
special TV program interviewed about him and indicated that he always
spends lots of his private time to improve his skill. As a result, keeping
enough ability to organize in a team is important characteristics for young
people.

In essence, because of the multiple living environment, it is necessary for

young people to enrich their values in the society. From my point of view, I
strongly believe that people strengthen the skill of plan and organize will aid
their competition in the future.

Word Count: 403

*Student’s original essay only had two body paragraphs. A full-scoring essay should have
three body paragraphs according to our fishbone structure, which keeps things organized.
 Q5 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Because
modern life is very complex, it is essential for young people to have the
ability to plan and organize. (Type 4 Question)

We are now living in a fast-paced society where everything is advancing

rapidly. Therefore, it is essential for young people to improve both their
planning and organizational skills.
(Type 4 Question Introduction: for this question type the answer needs to rephrase the question
then state a clear position on the topic. The introduction should be clear and concise: no examples,
no explanations. Vocabulary should be used correctly.)

First at all, time management is a crucial element to a functioning social

life. For example, college students have to juggle various activities such as
club meetings, study groups, and part-time work, all of which benefit one’s
future. Through maintaining an organized social life, young people can boost
their self-esteem and soothe their daily stress by being self-disciplined in
time control. If a student is industrious and can plan and organize the basic
aspects of daily life, larger obstacles become easier to deal with.
(Type 4 Question Body Paragraph 1: this paragraph is used to support example number one.
We focused on the benefits of being organized in a social environment, which made the paragraph
more coherent. This student had some experience with our phrases, but overused them. We actually
reduced the number of PHRASES used, as it went off track. PHRASES should be used sparingly
and correctly, rather than “listing” them in a paragraph.)

Young people ultimately want to find fulfilling work after graduation, so

having the ability to plan and organize is a necessary life skill. Research
projects, semester exams, and social activities and how they’re all dealt with
reflect one’s work ethic. Young people who don’t procrastinate and who
can follow their set agenda will be more outstanding than those who don’t.
For instance, when people successfully complete their tasks before a
deadline, whether it is handing in a thesis paper to the professor or handing in
a report to a supervisor, they can breathe easily because they have gotten rid
of a stress inducer. People who possess the strength and skill of planning
and organization will be more employable in the future when their potential
employers evaluate their capabilities.
(Type 4 Question Body Paragraph 2: this part should explain supporting detail number two. We
focused on the benefits of being organized/proper planning in work situations.)
 While some people are under the illusion that luck plays a big role in
success, countless examples show that successful people actually work hard
and have discipline. Young people need to gain a competitive edge and
enhance their potential to solve problems. All this requires excellent
planning and organization skills. Perhaps there’s no better example of success
through hard work than Stephen Curry, the famous NBA player who always
allocates lots of his private time to improving his three point throws. Even
for someone as successful as this, having the ability to organize and plan
one’s goals is an important characteristic for continued positive growth.
(Type 4 Question Body Paragraph 3: we mentioned the “other” viewpoint, showing a balanced
understanding of the question, but used its refutation to strengthen our own argument. We kept the
student’s NBA example to support the argument, and added appropriate PHRASES and
SENTENCE STRUCTURES.)

In essence, because we are living in a dynamic environment, it is

necessary for young people to enrich their value to society. Not only do better
planners and more organized people have a more fulfilling social life, they
also become more employable and are likely to achieve success beyond their
wildest dreams.
(Type 4 Question Conclusion: we added some SENTENCE STRUCTURES and an IDIOM to
make the concluding statement more organized and wide-ranging.)

Word Count: 397

Q5 CONTENT ANALYSIS

FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. boost their self-esteem

2. enhance their potential
3. evaluate their capabilities
4. gain a competitive edge
5. soothe their daily stress
6. “beyond their wildest dreams”
7. “breathe easily”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. We are now living in a fast-paced society where everything is

advancing rapidly.
2. Through maintaining an organized social life, young people can
boost their self-esteem and soothe their daily stress by being self-
disciplined in time control.
3. Young people ultimately want to find fulfilling work after
graduation, so having the ability to plan and organize is a necessary
life skill.
4. People who possess the strength and skill of planning and
organization will be more employable in the future when their
potential employers evaluate their capabilities.
5. While some people are under the illusion that luck plays a big role in
success, countless examples show that successful people actually
work hard and have discipline.
6. Perhaps there’s no better example of success through hard work than
Stephen Curry, the famous NBA player who always allocates lots of
his private time to improving his three point throws.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. allocates
10. possess
2. benefit
11. procrastinate
 3. competitive 12. self-disciplined
4. dynamic 13. semester
5. employable 14. stress-inducer
6. fast-paced society 15. supervisor
7. industrious 16. thesis
8. juggle 17. work ethic
9. obstacles

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Life is easier
now than it was in the past. (Type 4 Question)

Q2: Some people prefer to plan ahead while others prefer to live in the
moment. State your preference and give reasons for your choice. (Type 2
Question)

Q3: Some people think that luck plays the biggest in role in success.
Others argue that hard work is the most important. Which view do you agree
with and why? (Type 2 Question)
 Q5 FULL-SCORING FINAL VERSION
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Because
modern life is very complex, it is essential for young people to have the
ability to plan and organize. (Type 4 Question)

We are now living in a fast-paced society where everything is advancing

rapidly. Therefore, it is essential for young people to improve both their
planning and organizational skills.

First at all, time management is a crucial element to a functioning social

life. For example, college students have to juggle various activities such as
club meetings, study groups, and part-time work, all of which benefit one’s
future. Through maintaining an organized social life, young people can boost
their self-esteem and soothe their daily stress by being self-disciplined in
time control. If a student is industrious and can plan and organize the basic
aspects of daily life, larger obstacles become easier to deal with.

Young people ultimately want to find fulfilling work after graduation, so

having the ability to plan and organize is a necessary life skill. Research
projects, semester exams, and social activities and how they’re all dealt with
reflect one’s work ethic. Young people who don’t procrastinate and who
can follow their set agenda will be more outstanding than those who don’t.
For instance, when people successfully complete their tasks before a
deadline, whether it is handing in a thesis paper to the professor or handing in
a report to a supervisor, they can breathe easily because they have gotten rid
of a stress inducer. People who possess the strength and skill of planning
and organization will be more employable in the future when their potential
employers evaluate their capabilities.

While some people are under the illusion that luck plays a big role in
success, countless examples show that successful people actually work hard
and have discipline. Young people need to gain a competitive edge and
enhance their potential to solve problems. All this requires excellent
planning and organization skills. Perhaps there’s no better example of success
through hard work than Stephen Curry, the famous NBA player who always
allocates lots of his private time to improving his three point throws. Even
for someone as successful as this, having the ability to organize and plan
one’s goals is an important characteristic for continued positive growth.

In essence, because we are living in a dynamic environment, it is

necessary for young people to enrich their value to society. Not only do better
planners and more organized people have a more fulfilling social life, they
also become more employable and are likely to achieve success beyond their
wildest dreams.

Word Count: 397

 Q6 STUDENT’S VERSION
While some say progress is generally positive, others say there are many
negative consequences. Explain your view, giving relevant reasons and
examples. (Type 2 Question)

We are now living in a fast-paced society where everything is advancing

rapidly. We need to embrace the diversity of ideas and concepts. As a result,
although progress brings about various benefits for our life, it is not always
the case because something changes entirely not just adjust itself by some
progress.

There are some perks for our medical advancements which are all the
rage recently. Surgeons have better techniques; their tools are more accurate
and precise. Medicine can now help to improve many sicknesses. Plastic
surgery is cheap and pain-free. They are efficient and shorten the recovery
time. Moreover, people can live longer due to the newest techniques which
can make them more healthy and stronger. For example, nowadays there are
ample types of vaccines to prevent people from getting some diseases which
cannot be cured in the past. Also, right now babies who have immunizations
are healthier than those who don’t.

In addition, the progress of the technology also improves our daily life
and made it more colorful. For instance, internet software and different
communication facilities has made our life more convenient. It can help
people to acquire a sea of knowledge, enrich their interpersonal skills and
broaden their horizons at the same time. For instance, 6 centuries ago, people
tended to believe that earth is flat with edges. Thus, people gain updated
knowledge like History, Astronomy, and Geology. Besides, because of the
invention of social networks such as Facebook, Twitter and Instagram,
people can discuss an array of topics together via their smart phones. They
also can purchase items and manage their financial matters more quickly
thanks to the emergence of online shopping and e-commerce. However, the
fast pace of society still causes some shortcomings. For example, the gap
between the rich and the poor is very obvious around the world, and this
could eventually lead to racism and even sexism in some cases.
 What's more, many natural resources are disappearing on our planet.
People destroy forests to build farmland, houses, factories and shopping
malls. Although our daily living become more convenient, cutting trees has
resulted in many species losing their habitats and dying. It can also affect the
environment and even human lives.

To sum up, some people love progress and some people hate it which
brings the human society both benefits and new kinds of social problems.

Word Count: 392

 Q6 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION

While some say progress is generally positive, others say there are many
negative consequences. Explain your view, giving relevant reasons and
examples. (Type 2 Question)

Progress may be a double-edged sword, but I believe that progress brings

about innumerable benefits to mankind. The advantages of progress more
than compensate for the disadvantages.
(Type 2 Question Introduction: this should rephrase the question to show general
understanding, and then state a clear preference which will be expanded upon in the body
paragraphs. The student’s POV should be clearly stated for a strong introduction. We used an
IDIOM to indicate an understanding of the complexity of the issue, and SENTENCE
STRUCTURES to express the viewpoint in a straightforward way.)

Progress offers many advantages, the first and foremost of which is

medicine. Surgeons have better techniques, and their tools are more accurate
and precise than before. Prescription drugs can now help to improve the
symptoms of chronic diseases such as diabetes, high blood pressure, and
Hepatitis B. Micro-plastic surgery is affordable and pain-free, as well as
efficient and with a shorter recovery time. Moreover, people have extended
their lifespans via modern methods which can boost their immune systems
and enhance their stamina. For example, nowadays there are a variety of
vaccines to prevent people from contracting some diseases which were
incurable in the past, such as H1N1 and cervical cancer. What's more,
studies show that babies who are given immunizations are healthier than
those left unvaccinated.
(Type 2 Question Body Paragraph 1: the relevant supporting example of “medicine” was
fleshed out with more details and THEMATIC VOCABULARY. SENTENCE STRUCTURES and
PHRASES made points clearer and better organized.)

In addition, technological progress has also improved our daily life and
made it more colorful. For instance, people can enrich their interpersonal
skills on social networks such as Facebook, Twitter and Instagram, where
people can discuss an array of topics together via their smart phones. Along
with this, items can be purchased and financial matters managed more
quickly thanks to the emergence of online shopping and e-commerce.
Further, the average person can acquire a sea of knowledge from different
fields like History, Astronomy, and Geology whereas only a few centuries
ago people believed in a flat earth.
(Type 2 Question Body Paragraph 2: we refined the second relevant supporting example, this
time using “daily life” as its core. The opposite POV was removed because it went off-topic.
PHRASES were used more sparingly for better effect rather than “listing” too many of them. They
should be used correctly for best impact.)

However, some people bring up the valid point that many natural
resources are disappearing on our planet as a result of unbridled progress.
Forests are destroyed to build farmland, housing developments, industrial
factories and shopping malls. Severe deforestation has resulted in many
species losing their habitats and facing extinction. While all of this is indeed
true, the same technology that has caused these problems must be part of the
solution as well. In order to undo some of these horrendous situations, the
only practical way is through further progress. For instance, investments in
renewable energies such as solar have led to lower costs and more advanced
technology. Hybrid cars and emission-free vehicles are becoming
mainstream, and progress is constantly being made for environmental
challenges such as water contamination, recycling and pollution.
(Type 2 Question Body Paragraph 3: this section is used to show understanding of the other
viewpoint, in this case “environmental effects”. This is then refuted in a way which actually shows a
third benefit of progress. The addition of THEMATIC VOCABULARY showed a strong
understanding of the topic.)

To sum up, although some people have a love-hate relationship with

progress, the benefits of progress far outweigh its drawbacks. We are now
living in a fast-paced society where everything is advancing rapidly. The
necessity for progress seems clear.
(Type 2 Question Conclusion: the same sentiment was expressed as the original student essay,
but made more effective with an IDIOM and relevant SENTENCE STRUCTURES. Overall, it
restated the question and showed in-depth comprehension of a complex topic, while still clearly
choosing a viewpoint.)

Word Count: 420

Q6 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. acquire a sea of knowledge

2. an array of….
3. boost immune systems
4. enhance their stamina
5. enrich their interpersonal skills
6. extend their lifespans
7. “a love-hate relationship”
8. “a double-edged sword”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. The advantages of progress more than compensate for the

disadvantages.
2. Progress offers many advantages, the first and foremost of which is
medicine.
3. What's more, studies show that babies who are given immunizations
are healthier than those left unvaccinated.
4. Along with this, items can be purchased and financial matters
managed more quickly thanks to the emergence of online shopping
and e-commerce.
5. However, some people bring up the valid point that many natural
resources are disappearing on our planet as a result of unbridled
progress.
6. While all of this is indeed true, the same technology that has caused
these problems must be part of the solution as well.
7. To sum up, although some people have a love-hate relationship with
progress, the benefits of progress far outweigh its drawbacks.
8. The necessity for progress seems clear.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. chronic diseases 14. incurable

2. contamination 15. innumerable
 3. cervical cancer 16. mainstream
4. diabetes 17. micro-plastic surgery
5. emission-free vehicles 18. precise
6. extinction 19. prescription drugs
7. fast-paced society 20. rapidly
8. habitats 21. renewable energy
9. hepatitis B 22. severe deforestation
10. high blood pressure 23. solar
11. horrendous 24. species
12. hybrid cars 25. unbridled progress
13. immunizations 26. vaccines

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1: Compare and contrast the advantages and disadvantages of progress.

Then state whether you think progress has more benefits or drawbacks.
Explain your reasons. (Type 3 Question)

Q2: Is human activity benefiting the earth or harming it? (Type 2

Question)

Q3: It is widely acknowledged that AI (Artificial Intelligence) has

benefitted many industries. Experts argue that most of our jobs will be
replaced in the next 10 years. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?
(Type 4 Question)
 Q6 FULL-SCORING FINAL VERSION

While some say progress is generally positive, others say there are many
negative consequences. Explain your view, giving relevant reasons and
examples. (Type 2 Question)

Progress may be a double-edged sword, but I believe that progress brings

about innumerable benefits to mankind. The advantages of progress more
than compensate for the disadvantages.

Progress offers many advantages, the first and foremost of which is

medicine. Surgeons have better techniques, and their tools are more accurate
and precise than before. Prescription drugs can now help to improve the
symptoms of chronic diseases such as diabetes, high blood pressure, and
Hepatitis B. Micro-plastic surgery is affordable and pain-free, as well as
efficient and with a shorter recovery time. Moreover, people have extended
their lifespans via modern methods which can boost their immune systems
and enhance their stamina. For example, nowadays there are a variety of
vaccines to prevent people from contracting some diseases which were
incurable in the past, such as H1N1 and cervical cancer. What's more,
studies show that babies who are given immunizations are healthier than
those left unvaccinated.

In addition, technological progress has also improved our daily life and
made it more colorful. For instance, people can enrich their interpersonal
skills on social networks such as Facebook, Twitter and Instagram, where
people can discuss an array of topics together via their smart phones. Along
with this, items can be purchased and financial matters managed more
quickly thanks to the emergence of online shopping and e-commerce.
Further, the average person can acquire a sea of knowledge from different
fields like History, Astronomy, and Geology whereas only a few centuries
ago people believed in a flat earth.

However, some people bring up the valid point that many natural
resources are disappearing on our planet as a result of unbridled progress.
Forests are destroyed to build farmland, housing developments, industrial
factories and shopping malls. Severe deforestation has resulted in many
species losing their habitats and facing extinction. While all of this is indeed
true, the same technology that has caused these problems must be part of the
solution as well. In order to undo some of these horrendous situations, the
only practical way is through further progress. For instance, investments in
renewable energies such as solar have led to lower costs and more advanced
technology. Hybrid cars and emission-free vehicles are becoming
mainstream, and progress is constantly being made for environmental
challenges such as water contamination, recycling and pollution.

To sum up, although some people have a love-hate relationship with

progress, the benefits of progress far outweigh its drawbacks. We are now
living in a fast-paced society where everything is advancing rapidly. The
necessity for progress seems clear.

Word Count: 420

 Q7 STUDENT’S VERSION
What are some important qualities of a good supervisor (boss)? Use
specific details and examples to explain why these qualities are important.
(Type 1 Question)

What are some important qualities of a good supervisor? I believe that

they must have the following characteristics.

First, a good supervisor must aggressive and optimistic because the

supervisor's emotion always strongly influences the atmosphere in the office
or store. A aggressive supervisor can convince his subordinates to obey his
order, because subordinates look forward to see the supervisor works as hard
as them. In addition, the subordinates always work under high pressure and
feel frustrated when facing some difficulties. An optimistic supervisor can
encourage his subordinates and help them to built self-esteem. The
subordinates will also be aggressive when they think their boss take them
seriously.

Second, a good supervisor should be honest. He can't cheat and even tell a
white lie to his subordinates. For one thing, a supervisor who cheat his
subordinates can even lie to his customers. Actually, customers are very
sensitive and they will find that they have been cheated when using defected
products or experiencing bad services. Once the company lose loyalty to
customers, their market may plunge, and it will affect the subordinates' salary
in the long run. For another, a supervisor can lead his subordinates to lose
faith to him if he lie to them. The subordinates may easily quit or leak secret
information to other competitors, and it will be very dangerous to a company.

Third, if a supervisor can be humorous and open-minded, it will add on

benefits to the company. No one like to work under the authority, however,
the boss always have to make the critical decisions and it may not be
accepted by every subordinate. The supervisor should be capable of good
communication skill, and convince his subordinates who can't accept at first.
Most of people don't like to listen to a rigid boring long reason. If the
supervisor can tell a short interesting story, it also can be realized easily.
 In sum, I think that a supervisor should be aggressive, honest and
humorous. It's very hard to be an ideal supervisors, so the subordinates
should have the empathy to the supervisor. It will make the conflicts between
the boss and employees become less.

Word Count: 357

 Q7 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION
What are some important qualities of a good supervisor (boss)? Use
specific details and examples to explain why these qualities are important.
(Type 1 Question)

Having proper leadership is a necessary component for success in the

modern business world. While there are many key qualities of a good
supervisor, three of them stand out as fundamental.
(Type 1 Question Introduction: The introduction sounds more organized when it includes
SENTENCE STRUCTURES to rephrase the question and set up the response.)

First, a good supervisor must be confident, because a supervisor's

emotions always influence the ambiance in the work environment. An
assertive supervisor can convince his subordinates to obey orders, which is
necessary to keep the gears of the machine running smoothly. When faced
with adversity, an optimistic supervisor encourages his subordinates and
helps boost worker confidence. Employees mirror a competent and
confident boss, and ultimately contribute to a higher functioning
workplace. The manager can then trust his workers with further
responsibilities, delegating tasks to those who show more initiative.
(Type 1 Question Body Paragraph 1: Using “boost worker confidence” from our PHRASES
helped come up with an example of the first quality for a good boss. Removed the word
“aggressive”, which can have negative connotations. THEMATIC VOCABULARY added to the
point being made.)

Second, it should come as no surprise to learn that good supervisors are

innovative. They always go beyond their comfort zone and welcome new
challenges. Perhaps there’s no better example of great supervisors than Larry
Page and Sergey Brin, the founders of Google. They changed the world with
their revolutionary search engine. However, they’ve never rested on their
laurels. Every year, Google embarks on new technological ventures and
has become a household name. Therefore, the success of a company is
directly related to its constant evolution, which is undoubtedly in the hands
of a capable executive.
(Type 1 Question Body Paragraph 2: Using “go beyond one’s comfort zone” from our
PHRASES helped come up with an example of “innovative”. We re-wrote this paragraph to more
easily integrate an example, as using “innovative” seemed easier than using “honest”.)
 Third, if a supervisor has superlative interpersonal skills, it adds great
benefit to any company. An authority should be capable of communicating
clearly and effectively, and able to convince others who may have doubts. A
positive corporate culture is part of any productive company, so an
administrator that strengthens social bonds is a true asset. Let’s take
Richard Branson, the founder of Virgin Airlines for example. He once said in
an interview that communication is the most important skill any leader can
possess. He hires managers and executives who are eager to have fun at work
because they will pass that enthusiasm on to other employees in the company,
supporting a positive work environment.
(Type 1 Question Body Paragraph 3: We changed “humorous and open-minded” to strong
“interpersonal skills”, which is a broader way of referring to positive interactions. It also helped to
formulate a real world example for the paragraph.)

In sum, traits such as confidence, innovation , and congeniality

contribute to the making of a great supervisor. Employees will definitely
work with more motivation and can acquire a sea of knowledge when
working with supervisors with these essential traits.
(Type 1 Question Conclusion: This sounds much more organized with the inclusion of TIPS.
We’ve made a more general summary which reiterates the point of the question.)

Word Count: 369

Q7 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. acquire a sea of knowledge

2. boost worker confidence.
3. go beyond their comfort zone
4. mirror a competent and confident boss
5. strengthens social bonds
6. show more initiative
7. “a household name”
8. “rested on their laurels”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. Having proper leadership is a necessary component for success in the

modern business world.
2. While there are many key qualities of a good supervisor, three of
them stand out as fundamental.
3. An assertive supervisor can convince his subordinates to obey
orders, which is necessary to keep the gears of the machine running
smoothly.
4. When faced with adversity, an optimistic supervisor encourages his
subordinates and helps boost worker confidence.
5. Employees mirror a competent and confident boss, and ultimately
contribute to a higher functioning workplace.
6. Second, it should come as no surprise to learn that good supervisors
are innovative.
7. Perhaps there’s no better example of great supervisors than Larry
Page and Sergey Brin, the founders of Google.
8. Therefore, the success of a company is directly related to its constant
evolution, which is undoubtedly in the hands of a capable
executive.
9. Let’s take Richard Branson, the founder of Virgin Airlines for
example. He once said…
10. In sum, traits such as confidence, honesty, and congeniality
 contribute to the making of a great supervisor.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. administrator 12. evolution

2. adversity 13. fundamental
3. ambiance 14. higher-functioning workplace
4. assertive 15. innovative
5. asset 16. mirror
6. authority 17. productive
7. competent 18. revolutionary
8. congeniality 19. subordinates
9. corporate culture 20. superlative
10. embarks on 21. technological ventures
11. essential 22. traits

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1: What are some qualities of a great parent / teacher / marriage

partner? Why are they important? Explain your reasons. (Type 1 Question)

Q2: Who is the person you respect the most? Why do you respect him or
her? Include details and examples to support your explanation. (Type 1
Question)

Q3: Describe one historical figure you would like to meet and explain
why. Include specific details and examples in your explanation. (Type 1
Question)
 Q7 FULL-SCORING FINAL VERSION
What are some important qualities of a good supervisor (boss)? Use
specific details and examples to explain why these qualities are important.
(Type 1 Question)

Having proper leadership is a necessary component for success in the

modern business world. While there are many key qualities of a good
supervisor, three of them stand out as fundamental.

First, a good supervisor must be confident, because a supervisor's

emotions always influence the ambiance in the work environment. An
assertive supervisor can convince his subordinates to obey orders, which is
necessary to keep the gears of the machine running smoothly. When faced
with adversity, an optimistic supervisor encourages his subordinates and
helps boost worker confidence. Employees mirror a competent and
confident boss, and ultimately contribute to a higher functioning
workplace. The manager can then trust his workers with further
responsibilities, delegating tasks to those who show more initiative.

Second, it should come as no surprise to learn that good supervisors are

innovative. They always go beyond their comfort zone and welcome new
challenges. Perhaps there’s no better example of great supervisors than Larry
Page and Sergey Brin, the founders of Google. They changed the world with
their revolutionary search engine. However, they’ve never rested on their
laurels. Every year, Google embarks on new technological ventures and
has become a household name. Therefore, the success of a company is
directly related to its constant evolution, which is undoubtedly in the hands
of a capable executive.

Third, if a supervisor has superlative interpersonal skills, it adds great

benefit to any company. An authority should be capable of communicating
clearly and effectively, and able to convince others who may have doubts. A
positive corporate culture is part of any productive company, so an
administrator that strengthens social bonds is a true asset. Let’s take
Richard Branson, the founder of Virgin Airlines for example. He once said in
an interview that communication is the most important skill any leader can
possess. He hires managers and executives who are eager to have fun at work
because they will pass that enthusiasm on to other employees in the company,
supporting a positive work environment.

In sum, traits such as confidence, innovation , and congeniality

contribute to the making of a great supervisor. Employees will definitely
work with more motivation and can acquire a sea of knowledge when
working with supervisors with these essential traits.

Word Count: 371

 Q8 STUDENT’S VERSION
Some people believe that the Earth is being harmed (damaged) by
human activities. Others feel that human actions makes the Earth a better
place to live. What is your opinion? Use specific reasons and examples to
support your answer. (Type 2 Question)

In my point of view, I definetly believe the Earth is being harmed by

human activity, and I will explained few reasons below.

First of all, there are so many cars and factories on the Earth right now,
which cause serious problem of airpollution. In my country, in autumn and
winter, the air become extrodinary awful. It's difficult to see and make lots of
illness of breathing. Most people in my country have asthma, which from low
quality of the air. In addtion, because of the incress of co2, tempture has
higher than past decades. It leads global warming and unnormal of weather
chageing. Like last year, some places started snowing, which surprised all of
us on account of they never see it happened before. Winter become colder,
and hotter in summer, strange weather was all result in human activity.

Although it is more convenient for human to live on the Earth nowadays

that we have lots of transportaions to travel to other places and safety towns
for living, these were all came from harming the Earth. We burned millions
of trees to have ares of living, and exploded mountains for rocks to built
houses. We destroyed environment to let human alife but never think of other
species. The Earth has start fighting back to us, which had already made tens
of thousands of people dead.

We harmed the Earth for living, but actually, we are making a worse
place to live. Therefore, I think people should stop this, and try to find a way
which is benefit for both human and the Earth.

Word Count: 264

*The student’s original version has a word count of only 264. According to the ETS official
website: “There's no maximum length for your essay, but a good response is usually at least 300
words.” With our THEMATIC VOCABULARY, it is fairly easy to write an outstanding and
sophisticated essay with adequate word count.
 Q8 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION
Some people believe that the Earth is being harmed (damaged) by
human activities. Others feel that human actions makes the Earth a better
place to live. What is your opinion? Use specific reasons and examples to
support your answer. (Type 2 Question)

Unquestionably, the Earth is being harmed by human activity, and one of

the pressing problems facing our Earth today is climate change.
(Type 2 Question Introduction, we stated a clear preference, as well as added a SENTENCE
STRUCTURE and THEMATIC VOCABULARY. Spelling and basic grammar has been cleaned up
for the entire essay, and a third body paragraph was added.)

First of all, there are too many cars and factories now, both of which
cause serious air pollution. In my country, the autumn and winter air becomes
extraordinarily awful. The air quality deteriorates and the smog makes it
difficult to breathe. Hence, many people have contracted asthma and severe
allergies are commonplace. In addition, because of the surge in greenhouse
gasses like CO2 in recent decades, the temperature is higher than that in the
past. The effects of this climate change and severe weather fluctuations are
apparent. Last year in my country, some places started snowing, which
surprised all of us. This strange phenomenon is the consequence of human
activities on earth. There is little doubt that immediate action is required to
produce more eco-friendly technology such as alternative energies and
emissions-free vehicles.
(Type 2 Question Body Paragraph 1 states detail and gives real life examples to support this
view. The main topic, “pollution” can yield many examples which are expressed nicely with the TIPS
system.)

The ample evidence presented enables us to reasonably conclude that

human food production has a massive negative impact on the ecosystem.
Take for instance the elevated consumption of beef. Cows raised for
agricultural use produce high amounts of methane gas, which is a major
contributing factor to global warming. Moreover, rainforests are often
clear-cut to make more space for cattle farming, thereby reducing the
amount of beneficial foliage. The resulting floods, storms and droughts have
taken a toll, causing tens of thousands of deaths. In addition to clear-cutting
and burning trees for economic benefit, we also have hunted many species to
extinction. Human impact on animal populations has been drastic, done
simply to boost the economy.
(Type 2 Question Body Paragraph 3: states detail and gives real life examples to support this
view. “Food” is a huge topic which is easy to expand upon, and we added many words from our
THEMATIC VOCABULARY.)

Although humans have made extraordinary leaps in technological

advancement, it has not kept up with the destruction humans have caused to
Mother Nature. I recently read a newspaper article on the destruction of
seabeds and the disappearance of coral reefs. The deplorable problem of
overfishing has also aroused public concern. Furthermore, countries are
dumping their garbage into the oceans. In addition, offshore drilling for oil
and gas has resulted in oil leaks and noise pollution. The catastrophic
consequence is hundreds of whales beaching themselves. We should nurture
a sense of responsibility and become better stewards of the environment.
(Type 2 Question Body Paragraph 3: expresses understanding of the opposite argument to show
a balanced view, but uses this as a way to strengthen own view.) *Grammar note: lots of use of the
present perfect to show actions that began in the past and have continued up until now. Students
opting for this tense should make sure to have the verb forms correct.

We have the technological means to mitigate our environmental impact,

so we must try to find a way which is beneficial for both humans and the
Earth. We mustn’t lose sight of the fact that we’ve only got one planet, and
we need to interact with it in a better way.
(Type 2 Question Conclusion: While keeping the sentiment and meaning the same, we reworded
the conclusion with stronger language via the TIPS method.)

Word Count: 420

Q8 CONTENT ANALYSIS

FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. ...are commonplace
2. elevated consumption of beef
3. nurture a sense of responsibility
4. “lose sight of…”
5. “stewards of the environment”
6. “taken a toll”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. Unquestionably, the Earth is being harmed by human activity, and

one of the pressing problems facing our Earth today is climate
change.
2. This strange phenomenon is the consequence of human activities on
earth.
3. There is little doubt that immediate action is required to produce
more eco-friendly technology such as alternative energies and
emissions-free vehicles.
4. The ample evidence presented enables us to reasonably conclude that
human food production has a massive negative impact on the
ecosystem.
5. Moreover, rainforests are often clear-cut to make more space for
cattle farming, thereby reducing the amount of beneficial foliage.
6. In addition to clear-cutting and burning trees for economic benefit,
we also have hunted many species to extinction.
7. Although humans have made extraordinary leaps in technological
advancement, it has not kept up with the destruction humans have
caused to Mother Nature.
8. I recently read a newspaper article on the destruction of seabed and
the disappearance of coral reefs.
9. The deplorable problem of overfishing has also aroused public
concern.
 10. We mustn’t lose sight of the fact that we’ve only got one planet, and
we need to interact with it in a better way.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. agricultural use 17. extinction

2. allergies 18. foliage
3. alternative energies 19. global warming
4. apparent 20. greenhouse gases
5. asthma 21. massive
6. catastrophic 22. methane gas
7. cattle farming 23. mitigate
8. clear-cut 24. Mother Nature
9. climate change 25. overfishing
10. coral reefs 26. offshore drilling
11. deteriorates 27. phenomenon
12. drastic 28. rainforests
13. droughts 29. smog
14. eco-friendly 30. stewards of the
15. ecosystem environment
16. emissions-free 31. surge
vehicles 32. weather fluctuations

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. Should we prioritize human needs over keeping our environment in

its natural state? (Type 2 Question)

Q2. Environmental experts predict that we will use up all our resources in
50 years. How could we prevent this from happening? (Type 1 Question)

Q3. Should the government impose heavy tax on individuals who own
more than one car? Explain your reasons. (Type 2 Question)
 Q8 FULL-SCORING FINAL VERSION
Some people believe that the Earth is being harmed (damaged) by
human activities. Others feel that human actions makes the Earth a better
place to live. What is your opinion? Use specific reasons and examples to
support your answer. (Type 2 Question)

Unquestionably, the Earth is being harmed by human activity, and one of

the pressing problems facing our Earth today is climate change.

First of all, there are too many cars and factories now, both of which
cause serious air pollution. In my country, the autumn and winter air becomes
extraordinarily awful. The air quality deteriorates and the smog makes it
difficult to breathe. Hence, many people have contracted asthma and severe
allergies are commonplace. In addition, because of the surge in greenhouse
gasses like CO2 in recent decades, the temperature is higher than that in the
past. The effects of this climate change and severe weather fluctuations are
apparent. Last year in my country, some places started snowing, which
surprised all of us. This strange phenomenon is the consequence of human
activities on earth. There is little doubt that immediate action is required to
produce more eco-friendly technology such as alternative energies and
emissions-free vehicles.

The ample evidence presented enables us to reasonably conclude that

human food production has a massive negative impact on the ecosystem.
Take for instance the elevated consumption of beef. Cows raised for
agricultural use produce high amounts of methane gas, which is a major
contributing factor to global warming. Moreover, rainforests are often
clear-cut to make more space for cattle farming, thereby reducing the
amount of beneficial foliage. The resulting floods, storms and droughts have
taken a toll, causing tens of thousands of deaths. In addition to clear-cutting
and burning trees for economic benefit, we also have hunted many species to
extinction. Human impact on animal populations has been drastic, done
simply to boost the economy.

Although humans have made extraordinary leaps in technological

advancement, it has not kept up with the destruction humans have caused to
Mother Nature. I recently read a newspaper article on the destruction of
seabeds and the disappearance of coral reefs. The deplorable problem of
overfishing has also aroused public concern. Furthermore, countries are
dumping their garbage into the oceans. In addition, offshore drilling for oil
and gas has resulted in oil leaks and noise pollution. The catastrophic
consequence is hundreds of whales beaching themselves. We should nurture
a sense of responsibility and become better stewards of the environment.

We have the technological means to mitigate our environmental impact,

so we must try to find a way which is beneficial for both humans and the
Earth. We mustn’t lose sight of the fact that we’ve only got one planet, and
we need to interact with it in a better way.

Word Count: 420

 Q9 STUDENT’S VERSION
People have different ways of escaping the stress and difficulties of
modern life. What do you think is the best way to reduce stress? Use
specific details and examples in your answer. (Type 1 Question)

There are a great deal of ways to escape the stress and difficulties of
modern life such as reading, exercising or listening to music. I think the best
ways of reducing stress is exercise. Here is why.

First of all, exercises is the best way to shift the foucus. Some exercise is
so strong that they consume many energy and make people exhausted such as
basketball, tennis, and soccer. It will help people forget about something
causing stress temperily. In addition, some sports like basketball need team
cooperation, so they should pay attention to their team members. What's
more, people can feel proud when they win the game. Consquentlly, they will
immerse themselves in the game and away from stress.

Second, exercises is also an much economical way to release pressure

comparing to some activities such as going amusement park or sing a song in
KTV. We only have to buy a shoes when we jog or hike. We can jog on the
road or a track in a school. When it rains, we can also do aerobics or yoga in
the home. We can enjoy the benifits of releasing stress by exercising without
costing much money.

However, exercising itselves is not perfect. When we are under high

pressure, our resistence again disease may decrease. When we are sweat and
didn't put on clothes immediately, we may get a sick easily. Despite this, the
advantages of exercising are still more than its shortcomings. Not only
exercising can release pressure but It make us healthier. We can feel mentally
healthier too. In addition, it can help us to keep away from fat.

In brief, exercising is the best way to reduce stress. It can help us to shift
the focus and it is also economical to acheive it. There are countless benefits
that we can gain through exercising such as training our body and built up
stamia.
Word Count: 316
 Q9 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION
People have different ways of escaping the stress and difficulties of
modern life. What do you think is the best way to reduce stress? Use
specific details and examples in your answer. (Type 1 Question)

While there are many options for blowing off steam in modern times, I
think the best way of reducing stress is to exercise.
(Type 1 Question Introduction: the introduction should state a clear opinion, using proper
SENTENCE STRUCTURES, and in this case, an IDIOM.)

First of all, exercising is both physically and mentally healthy. One of the
best ways to calm a frantic mind is to shift one’s focus. Some exercises
such as basketball, tennis, and soccer are intensive and keep people on their
toes. Such intensity helps people forget their stress inducers. Furthermore,
one of the pressing problems facing many nations today is obesity. We are
now living in a fast-paced society; factors such as the intake of junk-food
and indolence contribute to an unhealthy lifestyle. Incorporating exercise
into one’s daily routine results in a strong sense of well-being. Moreover,
statistical evidence lends support to the view that students who exercise
perform better academically. We should keep in mind that being active can
greatly boost our immune systems, enhance our stamina, and help to
lower our cholesterol.
(Type 1 Question Body Paragraph 1: we presented a solid reason, backed up with several
relevant examples. “Health” as a topic has a broad range of examples to draw from, both physical
and mental. We re-organized the student’s essay to keep “health” topics in the same paragraph.)

Second, exercising is also an economical way to release pressure

compared to some activities such as going to the amusement park or singing
at a karaoke bar. All a budget-conscious person needs is a pair of runners to
go on a jog or hike. In addition, it’s highly accessible, as we can jog on the
road or a track at a school. What’s more, when it rains, we can also do
aerobics or yoga in the convenience of our own home. We can enjoy the
benefits of releasing stress by exercising without putting a dent in our
pocket. In fact, working out is an investment in the “self”, which pays off
large dividends in the long-run.
(Type 1 Question Body Paragraph 2: the second reason given refers to economics, so using
THEMATIC VOCABULARY from the “money and finance” category helps express these ideas.)
 Exercising is also a way to expand our social circle and get a sense of
belonging. For instance, I am a member of the community center badminton
club. We practice six hours a week and play friendly matches on the
weekends. It’s wonderful to have friends of common interests. In the same
vein, some sports like basketball and volleyball require team cooperation;
therefore people learn vital teamwork skills while immersed in a social
environment. They can gain a sense of achievement while polishing their
networking skills.
(Type 1 Question Body Paragraph 3: we used a third reason to support our thesis that exercise
is the best stress reliever. There is no need to explain the opposite viewpoint in a Type 1 essay. In
this case, we used some PHRASES to introduce the idea of the positive aspects to exercise, along
with THEMATIC VOCABULARY.)

In brief, exercising is the best way to reduce stress. Overall, there are
countless benefits that we can gain through exercising such as finding our
inner peace and keeping us both physically and mentally healthy.
(Type 1 Question Conclusion: it’s important to restate the thesis clearly and summarize
correctly to bring the essay to a close. )

Word Count: 394

Q9 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. boost immune systems

2. calm a frantic mind
3. expand our social circle
4. enhance our stamina
5. finding our inner peace
6. gain a sense of achievement
7. get a sense of belonging
8. lower our cholesterol
9. pays off large dividends in the long-run
10. polishing their networking skills
11. shift one’s focus
12. sense of well-being
13. “blowing off steam”
14. “budget conscious”
15. “keep in mind”
16. “keep people on their toes”
17. “putting a dent in our pocket”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. Furthermore, one of the pressing problems facing many nations today

is obesity.
2. We are now living in a fast-paced society; factors such as the intake
of junk-food and indolence contribute to an unhealthy lifestyle.
3. Moreover, statistical evidence lends support to the view that students
who exercise perform better academically.
4. In fact, working out is an investment in the “self”, which pays of
large dividends in the long-run.
5. In the same vein, some sports like basketball and volleyball require
team cooperation; therefore people learn vital teamwork skills while
immersed in a social environment.
6. Overall, there are countless benefits that we can gain through
 exercising such as finding our inner peace and keeping us both
physically and mentally healthy.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. aerobics 6. investment
2. crucial 7. incorporating
3. dividends 8. indolence
4. fast-paced society 9. stress inducers
5. intensive 10. vital

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. Describe a place you like to go for rest and relaxation. Explain why it
is a good place for you to relax. Include details and examples to support your
explanation. (Type 1 Question)

Q2. Some colleges require that every student participate in a sport club.
Do you agree with this policy? (Type 4 Question)

Q3. What is your favorite leisure activity? (Type 1 Question)

 Q9 FULL-SCORING FINAL VERSION
People have different ways of escaping the stress and difficulties of
modern life. What do you think is the best way to reduce stress? Use
specific details and examples in your answer. (Type 1 Question)

While there are many options for blowing off steam in modern times, I
think the best way of reducing stress is to exercise.

First of all, exercising is both physically and mentally healthy. One of the
best ways to calm a frantic mind is to shift one’s focus. Some exercises
such as basketball, tennis, and soccer are intensive and keep people on their
toes. Such intensity helps people forget their stress inducers. Furthermore,
one of the pressing problems facing many nations today is obesity. We are
now living in a fast-paced society; factors such as the intake of junk-food
and indolence contribute to an unhealthy lifestyle. Incorporating exercise
into one’s daily routine results in a strong sense of well-being. Moreover,
statistical evidence lends support to the view that students who exercise
perform better academically. We should keep in mind that being active can
greatly boost our immune systems, enhance our stamina, and help to
lower our cholesterol.

Second, exercising is also a economical way to release pressure compared

to some activities such as going to the amusement park or singing at a
karaoke bar. All a budget-conscious person needs is a pair of runners to go
on a jog or hike. In addition, it’s highly accessible, as we can jog on the road
or a track at a school. What’s more, when it rains, we can also do aerobics or
yoga in the convenience of our own home. We can enjoy the benefits of
releasing stress by exercising without putting a dent in our pocket. In fact,
working out is an investment in the “self”, which pays off large dividends
in the long-run.

Exercising is also a way to expand our social circle and get a sense of
belonging. For instance, I am a member of the community center badminton
club. We practice six hours a week and play friendly matches on the
weekends. It’s wonderful to have friends of common interests. In the same
vein, some sports like basketball and volleyball require team cooperation;
therefore people learn vital teamwork skills while immersed in a social
environment. They can gain a sense of achievement while polishing their
networking skills.

In brief, exercising is the best way to reduce stress. Overall, there are
countless benefits that we can gain through exercising such as finding our
inner peace and keeping us both physically and mentally healthy.

Word Count: 394

 Q10 STUDENT’S VERSION
Some people think that university students should focus on their
specialized areas while others argue they should take a variety of courses.
What’s your opinion and why? Include details and examples in your
explanation. (Type 2 Question)

Without a doubt, I think that it’s important for students to take classes in
many subjects when they are in the college.

First of all, when college students take courses in different fields, it can
not only help them to learn a lot but also open their minds. Students will have
more opportunities to be exposed to more fields so they will know what they
like. Therefore, it will also be easier for them to find our their strong points.
They will feel proud of themselves and this will give them confidence.
because they will be more concentrated on their academics.

In addition, when they take other curriculums, it can allow them to make
more friends. They will come in contact with people from different careers.
They can talk a variety of issues with them and they can learn a bit of
everything ranging from financial to legal to scientific knowledge. It can help
them to think more about important issues. They will become more creative.

What’s more, after taking classes in many fields, it helps them to decide
which area to focus on in graduate school. They can even combine two
arenas with one research topic to develop their own theory. These kind of
papers usually stand out more. Take me for example. When I was in college,
I majored in Labor Relations and Law. I researched labor’s law in graduate
school. I am a lawyer now and I specialize in labor’s law. I feel that the time
and efforts spent are totally worth it and I feel achieved from my daily work.

To sum up, some numbers show that students who double major earn
more than their counterparts who only majored in one field five years after
graduation.

Word Count: 290

*The student’s original version has a word count of only 290. According to the ETS official
website: “There's no maximum length for your essay, but a good response is usually at least 300
words.” With our TIPS, it is fairly easy to write an outstanding and sophisticated essay with
adequate word count.
 Q10 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION

Some people think that university students should just focus on their
specialized areas while others argue they should take a variety of courses.
What’s your opinion and why? Include details and examples in your
explanation. (Type 2 Question)

There is a general debate nowadays about whether post-secondary

students should just take courses in their specific field or enroll in a variety
of classes. Without a doubt, I think that it should be mandatory for students
to take a variety of classes while enrolled in university.
(Type 2 Question Introduction: this states a clear preference which is expanded upon in the
following body paragraphs.)

First of all, when university students take courses in different fields, it can
not only help them to acquire a wealth of information but also broaden
their horizons. This also makes it easier to combine two arenas into one
research topic to develop their own theories, which creates outstanding
papers. Students will have more opportunities to be exposed to more fields
so they will realize their potential. For instance, when I was in college, I
majored in Labor Relations and Law, researching labor laws in graduate
school. Now that I’m a lawyer specializing in labor law, I feel that the time
and effort spent totally paid off as I got the best of both worlds.
(Type 2 Question Body Paragraph 1: we reorganized the student’s essay to keep similar themes
together in the body paragraphs. In this paragraph, we used correct PHRASES to expand on the
topic of “knowledge acquisition”. We kept the student’s personal example, but moved it to keep the
topics coherent.)

In addition, when they get involved with another curriculum, it allows

them to expand their social circle and establish valuable connections.
They will come in contact with people from different walks of life. They can
talk about a variety of issues with others and be exposed to a rich array of
fields ranging from finance to legal to scientific knowledge. It can help them
to spark their creativity and stimulate their imaginations, allowing them
to become more creative overall. A recent survey revealed that students who
double-major earn more than their counterparts who only majored in one
field five years after graduation.
(Type 2 Question Body Paragraph 2: we kept the “social” topic, expressing it more clearly with
our PHRASES. We also added a “real world” example to bolster the point.)

While there is indeed merit to focussing on one specific area of study,

having exposure to different types of academics creates more well-rounded
students and future workers. Perhaps there’s no better example of this than
Mark Zuckerberg, the founder of Facebook. He majored in psychology but
took many computer science classes. He became a keen programmer and was
devoted to creating the world’s biggest social media platform. It’s
undeniable that having an assorted scholarly background contributed to the
success of his enterprise, with psychology playing an important role in the
functioning of Facebook.
(Type 2 Question Body Paragraph 3: as for all Type 2 Questions, we mentioned the opposite
POV to show an objective understanding of the question. We refuted this point, and supported it
with a real-world example expressed with our SENTENCE STRUCTURES.)

To sum up, having a diverse academic palate far outweighs being

intellectually one-dimensional. Ultimately, this is what makes a solid career
foundation.
(Type 2 Question Conclusion: we made sure the conclusion brought the essay to a proper close
using correct STRUCTURES.)

Word Count: 379

Q10 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. broaden their horizons

2. be exposed to more fields
3. establish valuable connections
4. expand their social circle
5. exposed to a rich array of fields
6. realize their potential
7. spark their creativity
8. stimulate their imaginations
9. “best of both worlds”
10. “different walks of life”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. There is a general debate nowadays about whether post-secondary

students should just take courses in their specific field or enroll in a
variety of classes.
2. I feel that the time and effort spent totally paid off as I got the best of
both worlds.
3. A recent survey revealed that students who double-major earn more
than their counterparts who only majored in one field five years
after graduation.
4. While there is indeed merit to focussing on one specific area of study,
having exposure to different types of academics creates more well-
rounded students and future workers.
5. Perhaps there’s no better example of this than Mark Zuckerberg, the
founder of Facebook.
6. It’s undeniable that having an assorted scholarly background
contributed to the success of his enterprise, with psychology
playing an important role in the functioning of Facebook.
7. To sum up, having a diverse academic palate far outweighs being
intellectually one-dimensional.
8. Ultimately, this is what makes a solid career foundation.
 FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. academic
9. keen
2. arenas
10. mandatory
3. counterparts
11. one-dimensional
4. curriculum
12. palate
5. devoted
13. paid off
6. diverse
14. social media platform
7. enterprise
15. well-rounded
8. enroll

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. Do you prefer to focus on one task at a time or do multiple tasks at

the same time? (Type 2 Question)

Q2. “In order to stay competitive, students should take classes in a variety
of fields.” Do you agree or disagree with this statement? (Type 4 Question)

Q3. Some people believe that it is important to be skilled in a wide

variety of things. Others believe that it is better to be an expert and specialize
in one field. Which do you prefer and why? (Type 2 Question)
 Q10 FULL-SCORING FINAL VERSION
Some people think that university students should just focus on their
specialized areas while others argue they should take a variety of courses.
What’s your opinion and why? Include details and examples in your
explanation. (Type 2 Question)

There is a general debate nowadays about whether post-secondary

students should just take courses in their specific field or enroll in a variety
of classes. Without a doubt, I think that it should be mandatory for students
to take a variety of classes while enrolled in university.

First of all, when university students take courses in different fields, it can
not only help them to acquire a wealth of information but also broaden
their horizons. This also makes it easier to combine two arenas into one
research topic to develop their own theories, which creates outstanding
papers. Students will have more opportunities to be exposed to more fields
so they will realize their potential. For instance, when I was in college, I
majored in Labor Relations and Law, researching labor laws in graduate
school. Now that I’m a lawyer specializing in labor law, I feel that the time
and effort spent totally paid off as I got the best of both worlds.

In addition, when they get involved with another curriculum, it allows

them to expand their social circle and establish valuable connections.
They will come in contact with people from different walks of life. They can
talk about a variety of issues with others and be exposed to a rich array of
fields ranging from finance to legal to scientific knowledge. It can help them
to spark their creativity and stimulate their imaginations, allowing them
to become more creative overall. A recent survey revealed that students who
double-major earn more than their counterparts who only majored in one
field five years after graduation.

While there is indeed merit to focussing on one specific area of study,

having exposure to different types of academics creates more well-rounded
students and future workers. Perhaps there’s no better example of this than
Mark Zuckerberg, the founder of Facebook. He majored in psychology but
took many computer science classes. He became a keen programmer and was
devoted to creating the world’s biggest social media platform. It’s
undeniable that having an assorted scholarly background contributed to the
success of his enterprise, with psychology playing an important role in the
functioning of Facebook.

To sum up, having a diverse academic palate far outweighs being

intellectually one-dimensional. Ultimately, this is what makes a solid career
foundation.

Word Count: 379

 Q11 STUDENT’S VERSION

Some people think that the family is the most important influence on
young adults. Other people think that friends are the most important
influence on young adults. Which view do you agree with? Use examples to
supports your position. (Type 2 Question)

Without a doubt, I think young adults are influenced by their friends

because they spend most of time with their friends in the school so they will
think his friends realize him more than his parents.
First of all, young adults have his independent thoughts so he can
distinguish with the black and white. In other words, he won’t depend on his
parents too much. They spend much time in school with his classmates.
School has become the best learning place for young adults. In school, they
can feel the peer pressure. In order to fit in, they will try to do the same things
like his classmates ranging from cloths to stationery to scores. In this stage,
they are afraid of being different with others.

In addition, they don’t want to listen to their parents in this stage because
they always think what he friends do or say is totally right. His classmates
become his role model. Once they have any problems such as academics or
own careers, they want to get advices from his friends. The important reason
is they are all in the similar age so they can know each other’s thoughts. In
other words, they don’t have any communicating gap. Take me for example.
When I was in the senior high school, my academic scores were not good.
Luckily, my best friend who’s name is Connie told me how to prepare the
monthly exam and I always discuss whatever the academic or living
problems with her. She could supply many advices for me. Finally, I made a
big progress.
However, we can’t deny family can still play an important role on young
adults. Parents are kids’ role model because family can cultivate the
characteristics of a person and it can influence his all life. In other words,
family is crucial too, but it’s not the most important influence on young
adults.

In brief, we can’t deny that the influence of the peer on young adults is
more vital than family’s function.

Word Count: 335

 Q11 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION

Some people think that the family is the most important influence on
young adults. Other people think that friends are the most important
influence on young adults. Which view do you agree with? Use examples to
supports your position. (Type 2 Question)

While there are many influences on young people as they develop into
adulthood, there is debate as to whether family or friends have the greater
impact. Without a doubt, I think young adults are influenced by their friends
mostly because of both the quality and quantity of their associations.

First of all, as a person grows, relying on parents becomes less and less
frequent. The majority of time is spent in school, which is not only the
learning place for students, but also a complex social structure. Within this
social framework, people experience peer pressure and constant social
interaction on a regular basis. In order to get a sense of belonging, they
compare everything from clothing to stationery to test scores. At this fragile
social stage, they are afraid of being different with others and they want to fit
in. With such constant reinforcement, it’s no surprise that friends have such
an overall huge influence.

In addition, young people may begin to take parents’ advice with a grain
of salt, as they think that their friends are more understanding of their
circumstances. In this regard, the quality of the interactions is vital, as
classmates have become more influential role models. Once they encounter
any problems in their academics or own careers, they seek advice from
friends first. As the famous saying goes, “a friend in need is a friend
indeed.” One important reason is that they are all around the same age so
they can better understand each other’s thoughts and interpretations of the
world. In other words, they don’t have any age or communication gap. For
instance, when I was in senior high school, my academic scores were below
average. Luckily, my best friend Simon told me how to prepare for the
monthly exams, as he understood my situation.
Although we can’t deny that family still plays an important role, most
young adults prefer spending time with their friends because they help to
color their lives. As a person matures, they realize that variety is the spice of
life, and parents are actually just a small part of the vast social fabric.
Personal experience has taught me that it’s important to associate with
people of different backgrounds because it will hone my social skills for
when I break into society. Learning about different hobbies, languages, and
cultures is definitely eye-opening and fascinating.

In brief, we can’t deny that the influence of peers on a young adults is

more vital than that of family. While we can’t choose our own family,
making the right friends can transform one’s life forever.

Word Count: 430

Q11 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. Get a sense of belonging

2. Hone my social skills
3. On a regular basis
4. “a friend in need is a friend indeed.”
5. “break into society”
6. “color their lives”
7. “eye-opening”
8. “take with a grain of salt”
9. “variety is the spice of life”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. While there are many influences on young people as they develop

into adulthood, there is debate as to whether family or friends have
the greater impact.
2. Without a doubt, I think young adults are influenced by their friends
most because of both the quality and quantity of their associations.
3. The majority of time is spent in school, which is not only the learning
place for students, but also a complex social structure.
4. With such constant reinforcement, it’s no surprise that friends have
such an overall huge influence.
5. In this regard, the quality of the interactions is vital, as classmates
have become more influential role models.
6. As the famous saying goes, “a friend in need is a friend indeed.”
7. One important reason is that they are all around the same age so they
can better understand each other’s thoughts and interpretations of
the world.
8. Personal experience has taught me that it’s important to associate
with people of different backgrounds because it will hone my social
skills when I break into society.
 FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. age gap
13. interpretations
2. academics 14. peer pressure
3. adulthood 15. quality
4. associations 16. quantity
5. associate with 17. reinforcement
6. circumstances 18. role models
7. communication gap 19. social fabric
8. encounter 20. social framework
9. fascinating 21. social structure
10. fragile 22. transform
11. frequent 23. vast
12. influential 24. vital

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. Who do you go to for advice when you’re faced with a problem?
(Type 1 Question)

Q2. “Parents know what’s best for their children.” Do you agree or
disagree with this statement? (Type 4 Question)

Q3. Some people make decisions instantly. Others only decide after
thinking about their choice for a long time. Which approach do you think is
better and why? (Type 2 Question)
 Q11 FULL-SCORING FINAL VERSION

Some people think that the family is the most important influence on
young adults. Other people think that friends are the most important
influence on young adults. Which view do you agree with? Use examples to
supports your position. (Type 2 Question)

While there are many influences on young people as they develop into
adulthood, there is debate as to whether family or friends have the greater
impact. Without a doubt, I think young adults are influenced by their friends
mostly because of both the quality and quantity of their associations.

First of all, as a person grows, relying on parents becomes less and less
frequent. The majority of time is spent in school, which is not only the
learning place for students, but also a complex social structure. Within this
social framework, people experience peer pressure and constant social
interaction on a regular basis. In order to get a sense of belonging, they
compare everything from clothing to stationery to test scores. At this fragile
social stage, they are afraid of being different with others and they want to fit
in. With such constant reinforcement, it’s no surprise that friends have such
an overall huge influence.

In addition, young people may begin to take parents’ advice with a grain
of salt, as they think that their friends are more understanding of their
circumstances. In this regard, the quality of the interactions is vital, as
classmates have become more influential role models. Once they encounter
any problems in their academics or own careers, they seek advice from
friends first. As the famous saying goes, “a friend in need is a friend
indeed.” One important reason is that they are all around the same age so
they can better understand each other’s thoughts and interpretations of the
world. In other words, they don’t have any age or communication gap. For
instance, when I was in senior high school, my academic scores were below
average. Luckily, my best friend Simon told me how to prepare for the
monthly exams, as he understood my situation.
Although we can’t deny that family still plays an important role, most
young adults prefer spending time with their friends because they help to
color their lives. As a person matures, they realize that variety is the spice of
life, and parents are actually just a small part of the vast social fabric.
Personal experience has taught me that it’s important to associate with
people of different backgrounds because it will hone my social skills for
when I break into society. Learning about different hobbies, languages, and
cultures is definitely eye-opening and fascinating.

In brief, we can’t deny that the influence of peers on a young adults is

more vital than that of family. While we can’t choose our own family,
making the right friends can transform one’s life forever.

Word Count: 430

 Q12 STUDENT’S VERSION

Q: Why are modern people living longer? Use specific reasons and
examples to develop your essay. (Type 1 Question)

I strongly agree with the view that modern people are living longer. It is
exact that human have a life expectancy more than 70 years old. But in the
past, people only lived to 50 years old. Here some reasons for this.

The first reason is the equal food and drink consuming. Today, more and
more hospitals have the nutritionists in it, which give the assistance to anyone
who didn’t understand how to eat healthy. As a result, people can know that
food is playing an important role in our life.

Another reason is doing exercise regularly. For example, lots of U-bike

bases are full of the streets in my country. Many residents want to be a
commuter by riding U-bike. Not only can we decrease our paying, but we
also keep our physically and mentally health. What’s more, we may relax by
doing exercise like playing basketball, go jogging and go swimming. So,
without doing exercise may result in many problems.

The last but not least, human beings could live longer because of modern
technology. A number of modern products hit the market can help everyone
needs like refrigerators and vehicles. We can use the refrigerators to store the
food lest they stink. In contrast with the past, modern vehicles substitute the
cart, therefore, we don’t use manpower to advance.

In sum, there are various ways to make people living longer and to keep
people healthy.

Word Count: 237

*The student’s original version has a word count of only 237. According to the ETS official
website: “There's no maximum length for your essay, but a good response is usually at least 300
words.” With our TIPS, it is fairly easy to write an outstanding and sophisticated essay with
adequate word count.
 Q12 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION

Q: Why are modern people living longer? Use specific reasons and
examples to develop your essay. (Type 1 Question)

Humans now have an average life expectancy of more than 70 years,

which is considerably longer than any time in the past. However, it’s only in
modern times that people have started living significantly longer, and there
are several important reasons for this.
(Type 1 Question Introduction: this is not an “agree or disagree” Type 4 question, so the
phrasing was changed in the introduction to reword the question and to give a broad introduction to
the topic, which is required for a Type 1 Question response.)

The first reason for such increased longevity is better education regarding
healthy food and drink consumption. Nutritional information is widely
available to the general population via print or electronic media.
Furthermore, more and more hospitals have nutritionists who provide
assistance to anyone who doesn’t understand how to eat healthily. As a result,
people realize that food and eating right is playing an important role in our
lives. In fact, a recent study revealed that overconsumption diseases such as
cardio-vascular sickness or diabetes are directly connected to obesity, so
the role of food in health and well-being is now better understood.
(Type 1 Question Body paragraph 1: the main theme of this paragraph is education/food, so we
added examples in order to incorporate more THEMATIC VOCABULARY and show a deeper
understanding of the topic.)

Another reason for a longer lifespan is a stable society that allows for
doing exercise regularly. With ample food so readily available, people now
have a surplus of time to engage in physical activity. For example, there are
lots of government-sponsored bike bases everywhere on city streets in my
country. Many residents commute by riding these bikes to not only save on
transportation costs, but also keep themselves physically and mentally
healthy. For instance, we understand that riding bikes can help us to lower
our cholesterol and boost our metabolism. What’s more, we may soothe
our daily stress by engaging in physical hobbies like playing basketball,
jogging and swimming. These enable us to enhance our stamina as well. In
contrast, not exercising may result in many health problems and even lack of
confidence.
 (Type 1 Question Body Paragraph 2: this paragraph required re-working, including more
“health” THEMED VOCABULARY to add to the main idea of “exercise”.)

Not insignificantly, human beings now have a longer life expectancy

because of modern technology. The refrigerator definitely caters to
everyone’s needs, and foods can be stored for longer without worrying about
spoilage and foodborne illnesses. Furthermore, modern medical advances
like the invention of antibiotics and better surgical techniques have had far-
reaching impact. Not only are previously fatal afflictions now easily
remedied with a pill, but we also are more aware of preventative measures
to safeguard our health. Examples of this include bacterial pneumonia,
syphilis, and rabies. On top of this, modern times gives us access to CAT
scans, X-rays, chemotherapy and treatments for other chronic ailments.
(Type 1 Question Body Paragraph 3: this required more attention, fleshing out the examples
and adding the crucial idea of modern medical advances. We removed the example of “modern
vehicles”, opting instead for the more obvious one of “medical advances”, which makes for a
smoother, more coherent essay. This made it easier to incorporate our STRUCTURES and
THEMATIC VOCABULARY.)

In sum, human lifespan have increased due to a healthy balance of proper

food intake and regular exercise, as well as technological breakthroughs. A
combination of these factors has resulted in a lower mortality rate and a
better quality of life for most people on the planet.
(Type 1 Question Conclusion: we added a more comprehensive conclusion which reiterated the
key points made in the Body Paragraphs.)

Word Count: 429

Q12 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. boost our metabolism

2. caters to everyone’s needs
3. enhance our stamina
4. far-reaching impact
5. government-sponsored
6. lower our cholesterol
7. soothe our daily stress
8. safeguard our health

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. In fact, a recent study revealed that overconsumption diseases such

as cardio-vascular sickness or diabetes are directly connected to
obesity, so the role of food in health and well-being is now better
understood.
2. Not insignificantly, human beings now have a longer life expectancy
because of modern technology.
3. Not only are previously fatal afflictions now easily remedied with a
pill, but we also are more aware of preventative measures to
safeguard our health.
4. Examples of this include bacterial pneumonia, syphilis, and rabies.
5. On top of this, modern times gives us access to CAT scans, X-rays,
chemotherapy and treatments for other chronic ailments.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. afflictions 18. longevity

2. ailments 19. mortality rate
3. ample 20. nutritionists
4. antibiotics 21. obesity
5. bacterial 22. overconsumption
pneumonia 23. preventative measures
6. cardiovascular 24. rabies
 7. CAT scans 25. readily available
8. chemotherapy 26. remedied
9. chronic 27. residents
10. consumption 28. spoilage
11. considerably 29. surplus of time
12. commute 30. syphilis
13. diabetes 31. technological
14. fatal breakthroughs
15. foodborne illnesses 32. widely available
16. general population 33. X-rays
17. life expectancy

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. Our lives are easier than that of our parents when they were young.
Do you agree or disagree with this statement? (Type 4 Question)

Q2. Cloning is the process of creating copies of organisms using

biotechnology. Does cloning have more advantages or disadvantages? (Type
2 Question)

Q3. One should live a relaxed life instead of always hurrying. Do you
agree or disagree with the above statement? (Type 4 Question)
 Q12 FULL-SCORING FINAL VERSION

Q: Why are modern people living longer? Use specific reasons and
examples to develop your essay. (Type 1 Question)

Humans now have an average life expectancy of more than 70 years,

which is considerably longer than any time in the past. However, it’s only in
modern times that people have started living significantly longer, and there
are several important reasons for this.

The first reason for such increased longevity is better education regarding
healthy food and drink consumption. Nutritional information is widely
available to the general population via print or electronic media.
Furthermore, more and more hospitals have nutritionists who provide
assistance to anyone who doesn’t understand how to eat healthily. As a result,
people realize that food and eating right is playing an important role in our
lives. In fact, a recent study revealed that overconsumption diseases such as
cardio-vascular sickness or diabetes are directly connected to obesity, so
the role of food in health and well-being is now better understood.

Another reason for a longer lifespan is a stable society that allows for
doing exercise regularly. With ample food so readily available, people now
have a surplus of time to engage in physical activity. For example, there are
lots of government-sponsored bike bases everywhere on city streets in my
country. Many residents commute by riding these bikes to not only save on
transportation costs, but also keep themselves physically and mentally
healthy. For instance, we understand that riding bikes can help us to lower
our cholesterol and boost our metabolism. What’s more, we may soothe
our daily stress by engaging in physical hobbies like playing basketball,
jogging and swimming. These enable us to enhance our stamina as well. In
contrast, not exercising may result in many health problems and even lack of
confidence.

Not insignificantly, human beings now have a longer life expectancy

because of modern technology. The refrigerator definitely caters to
everyone’s needs, and foods can be stored for longer without worrying about
spoilage and foodborne illnesses. Furthermore, modern medical advances
like the invention of antibiotics and better surgical techniques have had far-
reaching impact. Not only are previously fatal afflictions now easily
remedied with a pill, but we also are more aware of preventative measures
to safeguard our health. Examples of this include bacterial pneumonia,
syphilis, and rabies. On top of this, modern times gives us access to CAT
scans, X-rays, chemotherapy and treatments for other chronic ailments.

In sum, human lifespan have increased due to a healthy balance of proper

food intake and regular exercise, as well as technological breakthroughs. A
combination of these factors has resulted in a lower mortality rate and a
better quality of life for most people on the planet.

Word Count: 429

 Q13 STUDENT’S VERSION

Compare and contrast the advantages of raising kids in the city and
doing so in the countryside. Which do you prefer and why? (Type 3
Question)

Children who are raised in the city have many chances to broaden their
horizons, expand their social circle, and become a global citizen.

For instance, I grew up in Shanghai city centre and I know the importance
of having an international view. Shanghai has several famous museums and
historical heritages for me to enrich my knowledge and immerse myself in
the local culture. What’s more, my parents signed me up in several clubs such
as the city youth golf club and the “foodie” club which enabled me to
improve my interpersonal skills. Furthermore, the educational standards in
the city and the qualifications of teachers are generally higher than that in the
countryside. Therefore children in the city would probably gain more of a
competitive edge as they enter society.

However, it doesn’t mean that raising children in the countryside does not
have its advantages. First of all, living in the countryside is beneficial for
strengthening our family bond because there are less temptations and
distractions. In addition, kids can also stimulate their creativity in the
countryside. What’s more, kids can soothe daily stress whenever they want.
Also, there is less peer pressure in the countryside.

Despite the benefits of raising children in the countryside, I would still

prefer raising children in the city. Not only can they acquire a sea of
knowledge but also gain a sense of achievement and accomplishment. Take
me for example. I grew up in Shanghai and enjoyed eating mouth-watering
and scrumptious cuisine of any sorts whenever I want to.

In essence, although there are perks to raising children in the countryside,

I strongly believe that the advantages of raising children in the city outweigh
that of in the countryside. I believe that a childhood in the city will be
colorful and enjoyable for them.
Word count: 300
 Q13 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION

Compare and contrast the advantages of raising kids in the city and
doing so in the countryside. Which do you prefer and why? (Type 3
Question)

When it comes to raising kids, some people think that the countryside is
the best place for it. Others argue that the city is better. Raising children in
the city is a better choice because they have tons of opportunities to broaden
their horizons, expand their social circle, and develop a more global
perspective.
(Type 3 Question Introduction: we rephrased the question and stated a clear preference.
Phrases have been added to make the topic sentence clear and connected to the body paragraphs.)

Living in the city offers many advantages, the first and foremost of which
is acquiring a wealth of knowledge. For example, I grew up in Shanghai,
China. Shanghai houses several world-renowned museums and historical
heritage sites for me to enrich my knowledge and immerse myself in the
local culture. What’s more, my parents enrolled me in several clubs such as
the city youth golf club and the “foodie” club which enabled me to improve
my interpersonal skills. Furthermore, the educational standards in the city
and the qualifications of teachers are generally higher than that in the
countryside. Therefore, children in the city could gain more of a competitive
edge as they break into society.
(Type 3 Question Body Paragraph 1: we restated the preference and expanded upon the details
with relevant examples. PHRASES and THEMATIC VOCABULARY helped to express the ideas
better.)

However, that is not to say that raising children in the countryside does
not have its advantages. First of all, living in the countryside is beneficial for
strengthening our family bond. For instance, the family can engage in
outdoor activities such as hiking and camping. In addition, kids can also
stimulate their creativity in the countryside as they’re not faced with
constant distractions that exist in an urban environment. Rather than
spending time at large entertainment centers or malls, kids are more likely to
interact with one another via local sports clubs or social groups. What’s
more, they soothe their daily academic stress in an environment with less
pressure. They can avoid the hustle and bustle of the city and take advantage
of living close to Mother Nature.
(Type 3 Question Body Paragraph 2: we expressed understanding of the opposite viewpoint,
creating a balanced and well-thought out essay. Examples have been added, as well as our TIPS
components.)

Despite the benefits of raising children in the countryside, I would prefer

raising children in the city. Not only can they gain an international
perspective, but also become a global citizen. Growing up in Shanghai, I
enjoyed the privilege of interacting with people from diverse backgrounds.
I came in contact with people from different walks of life, which gave me
fresh perspective on a variety of issues. Exposure to a more multi-cultural
existence allowed me to experience different languages, foods and customs.
Having this as part of my formative years better prepared me for life in our
global village.
(Type 3 Question Body Paragraph 3: we compared and contrasted the two choices, reiterating
reasons and strengthening the argument for the student’s preference. We expanded the personal
example to give it a broader perspective rather than just “food”, adding in languages, customs, and
global awareness.)

In essence, while both perspectives have merits, I strongly believe that in

the long run, the advantages of raising children in the city outweigh those of
living in the countryside. A childhood in the city is definitely life-
transforming and much more colorful.
(Type 3 Question Conclusion: Once again, the preference is made clear, and the ideas are
succinctly summed up within a better STRUCTURE.)

Word count: 437

Q13 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. acquiring a wealth of knowledge

2. become a global citizen
3. broaden their horizons
4. came in contact with
5. develop a more global perspective
6. enrich my knowledge
7. expand their social circle
8. gain an international perspective
9. gave me fresh perspectives
10. immerse myself in the local culture
11. improve my interpersonal skills
12. multi-cultural existence
13. soothe their daily academic stress
14. stimulate their creativity
15. strengthening our family bond
16. “break into society”
17. “hustle and bustle”
18. “in the long run”
19. “take advantage of”
20. “walks of life”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. When it comes to raising kids, some people think that the countryside
is the best place for it. Others argue that the city is better.
2. Living in the city offers many advantages, the first and foremost of
which is acquiring a wealth of knowledge.
3. However, that is not to say that raising children in the countryside
does not have its advantages.
4. Despite the benefits of raising children in the countryside, I would
prefer raising children in the city.
5. Not only can they gain an international perspective, but also
 become a global citizen.
6. Having this as part of my formative years better prepared me for life
in our global village.
7. In essence, while both perspectives have merits, I strongly believe
that in the long run, the advantages of raising children in the city
outweigh those of living in the countryside.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. competitive edge
9. international perspective
2. distractions
10. life-transforming
3. diverse backgrounds
11. Mother Nature
4. engage in
12. multi-cultural existence
5. exposure
13. privilege
6. formative years
14. urban
7. global village
15. world-renowned
8. houses

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. Some people prefer to live a carefree lifestyle in the country. Others
prefer to lead a more exciting life in the city. Which do you prefer and why?
(Type 2 Question)

Q2. Which is more important? Improving the living standard in the

countryside or enhance the infrastructure in the city? (Type 2 Question)

Q3. Some people visit the countryside and the more local areas of the
country they are visiting. Others prefer visiting the tourist hotspots. Which do
you prefer and why? (Type 2 Question)
 Q13 FULL-SCORING FINAL VERSION

Compare and contrast the advantages of raising kids in the city and
doing so in the countryside. Which do you prefer and why? (Type 3
Question)

When it comes to raising kids, some people think that the countryside is
the best place for it. Others argue that the city is better. Raising children in
the city is a better choice because they have tons of opportunities to broaden
their horizons, expand their social circle, and develop a more global
perspective.

Living in the city offers many advantages, the first and foremost of which
is acquiring a wealth of knowledge. For example, I grew up in Shanghai,
China. Shanghai houses several world-renowned museums and historical
heritage sites for me to enrich my knowledge and immerse myself in the
local culture. What’s more, my parents enrolled me in several clubs such as
the city youth golf club and the “foodie” club which enabled me to improve
my interpersonal skills. Furthermore, the educational standards in the city
and the qualifications of teachers are generally higher than that in the
countryside. Therefore, children in the city could gain more of a competitive
edge as they break into society.

However, that is not to say that raising children in the countryside does
not have its advantages. First of all, living in the countryside is beneficial for
strengthening our family bond. For instance, the family can engage in
outdoor activities such as hiking and camping. In addition, kids can also
stimulate their creativity in the countryside as they’re not faced with
constant distractions that exist in an urban environment. Rather than
spending time at large entertainment centers or malls, kids are more likely to
interact with one another via local sports clubs or social groups. What’s
more, they soothe their daily academic stress in an environment with less
pressure. They can avoid the hustle and bustle of the city and take advantage
of living close to Mother Nature.

Despite the benefits of raising children in the countryside, I would prefer

raising children in the city. Not only can they gain an international
perspective, but also become a global citizen. Growing up in Shanghai, I
enjoyed the privilege of interacting with people from diverse backgrounds.
I came in contact with people from different walks of life, which gave me
fresh perspective on a variety of issues. Exposure to a more multi-cultural
existence allowed me to experience different languages, foods and customs.
Having this as part of my formative years better prepared me for life in our
global village.

In essence, while both perspectives have merits, I strongly believe that in

the long run, the advantages of raising children in the city outweigh those of
living in the countryside. A childhood in the city is definitely life-
transforming and much more colorful.

Word count: 437

 Q14 STUDENT’S VERSION

Famous athletes and entertainers deserve million dollar salaries every

year. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Use specific reasons
and examples to support your opinion. (Type 4 Question)

Without a doubt, I believe that some famous athletes and entertainers

deserve millions of dollars every years. Here is why.

First, famous athletes and entertainers earn a lot of money but they also
work under very high pressure. People around the world will watch the
famous athletes playing the game. They can't get nervous and still
concentrated on the game. It's not easy. In additioin, If they get lost, they may
also lose lots of fans. Once they lose someone who support them, it will also
affect their reputation and lower their salaries in the long run. I think the risk
is higher then the normal job. They have courage and ability to do it, so they
deserve such high salaries.

Second, they usually work harder then the general people. A famous
athletes can't play well without hundrend and thousand of times of practice.
Then started their training since they are children while others may spend
much time on playing. Their parents may spend a lot of money on their
learning. They may get defeated hundred times in many games. However,
they don't give up easily, so they could be successful and famous. An
entertainer on the other hand, they have to perform in a small stage and have
no chance to play on TV showes. However, these small cases keeped training
their presentation and sing skill, and they could know how to make audiences
laugh. People can't be a entertainer without knowing what the public want.
Their performance today is based on their hard working yesterday.

Third, if the salary of the athletes or entertainers is like gereral people, no

one will dream about becoming a athlete or entertainer. Their professionalism
make young people want to be as excellent as them. In order to gain a sense
of achievement and bring awareness from the public, young people will
easily motivated by the encouraging storing. As a result, their high salary will
make their professionalism valuable.
 In sum, people can't become a good athlete or entertainer at the expense
of their time and money. We should look if from a positive perspective. If we
want to get such high salaries, we should work as hard as them and never
give up when we are defeated.

Word Count: 375

 Q14 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION

Famous athletes and entertainers deserve million dollar salaries every

year. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Use specific reasons
and examples to support your opinion. (Type 4 Question)

There is a general debate nowadays about whether celebrities are

overpaid or if their high salaries are justified. Without a doubt, I agree that
such people deserve millions of dollars every year.

First, famous athletes and entertainers earn a lot of money but they also
work under very high pressure, sacrificing their privacy in the process. Fans
around the world watch these famous athletes play live, so they’re under
constant scrutiny. They need to concentrate on the task at hand, which
isn’t easy. In addition, if they make a mistake, they may also lose millions of
fans. Once they lose supporters, it also affects their reputation and lowers
their salaries in the long run. Unquestionably, the stresses and risks are
higher compared to that of a regular office job. They have the courage and
ability to do it, so they deserve such high salaries to offset the performance
anxiety. Persistence in the face of adversity is a key requirement during
their career span.

Second, the shelf-life of such performers is much shorter than careers of

the general public. A famous athlete can't play well without investing
thousands of hours of his personal time. Their success is directly related to
the hard work they put in. Along with this, their parents also had to fork out a
large amount of money to pay the trainers and coaches, so there is quite a
large investment in both time and money in order to reach such levels of
fame. Overall, most players only have around a decade of peak athletic
ability, so the high salary is a means to balance out such a short career
timeline.

Critics of such high salaries contend that the massive wage discrepancy
between average citizens and celebrities is unfair. However, these
professional athletes or entertainers usually leverage their positions to
become positive role models for young people. What’s more, celebrities also
bring awareness of certain issues to the public via high profile charity work.
They volunteer at orphanages, old folks homes and endorse charitable
organizations. Perhaps there’s no better example of this than Cristiano
Ronaldo, the forward of Real Madrid soccer team. Not only celebrated as a
top player, he was also voted the most charitable athlete in the world for his
generous donations to numerous causes including funding for a cancer
research center.

In sum, people become good athletes or entertainers at the expense of

their time and money. We should look at it from a positive perspective. If a
person wants to get such a high salary, this requires hard work, strong
character, and persistence, even when faced with adversity.

Word Count: 434

Q14 CONTENT ANALYSIS

FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. concentrate on the task at hand

2. faced with adversity
3. persistence in the face of adversity
4. reach such levels of fame
5. sacrificing their privacy
6. “fork out”
7. “in the long run”
8. “shelf-life”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. There is a general debate nowadays about whether celebrities are

overpaid or if their high salaries are justified.
2. Once they lose supporters, it also affects their reputation and lowers
their salaries in the long run.
3. Persistence in the face of adversity is a key requirement during
their career span.
4. Their success is directly related to the hard work they put in.
5. Along with this, their parents also had to fork out a large amount of
money to pay the trainers and coaches, so there is quite a large
investment in both time and money in order to reach such levels of
fame.
6. Overall, most players only have around a decade of peak athletic
ability, so the high salary is a means to balance out such a short
career timeline.
7. Critics of such high salaries contend that the massive wage
discrepancy between average citizens and celebrities is unfair.
8. Perhaps there’s no better example of this than Cristiano Ronaldo, the
forward of Real Madrid soccer team.
9. Not only celebrated as a top player, he was also voted the most
charitable athlete in the world for his generous donations to
numerous causes including funding for a cancer research
 center.
10. In sum, people become good athletes or entertainers at the expense
of their time and money.
11. If a person wants to get such a high salary, this requires hard work,
strong character, and persistence, even when faced with adversity.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY

1. adversity 14. numerous

2. career span 15. offset
3. career timeline 16. orphanages
4. celebrated as 17. peak athletic ability
5. causes 18. performance anxiety
6. critics 19. persistence
7. endorse 20. positive perspective
8. expense 21. role models
9. forward 22. scrutiny
10. general public 23. shelf-life
11. high profile 24. career span
12. key requirement 25. wage discrepancy
13. massive 26. volunteer

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. “Celebrities should sacrifice their privacy in exchange for the high
salary that they make.” Do you agree or disagree with this statement? State
your reasons. (Type 4 Question)

Q2. Many teenagers idolize celebrities. Do you think this is a positive or

negative trend? (Type 2 Question)

Q3. “We should be realistic and find jobs that are traditional instead of
pursuing dream jobs such as becoming a famous singer or actor.” Do you
agree or disagree with this statement? (Type 4 Question)
 Q15 STUDENT’S VERSION

What are the important qualities of a good son or daughter? Use

specific and examples to support your answer. (Type 1 Question)

Without a doubt, the imperative qualities of a good son or daughter are

independent, diligent and budget-conscious. These qualities have not changed
over time in my culture. In fact, they are still thriving.

First of all, if a child is independent, his parents will have their own time
for their hobbies. Children can share the load of doing house chores so
parents don’t have to do many imitations every day. Besides, as children can
go to school by taking public transportations, their parents don’t have to drop
off and pick them up every day. If children can be independent, it will
strengthen their family’s bond too because everyone contributes to the
family, they won’t argue and be calculative with small tasks.

In addition, if a son or daughter is diligent, his parents would not have to

worry about his academics. He will be studious every day and set high
standards for themselves proactively. If children can concentrate on what
they are interested in, they will enhance their interpersonal skills. In order to
realize the theory or skills, they will study a variety of books so that they can
not only acquire a wealth of knowledge but also broaden their horizons. Also,
it allows them to spark their creativities. Take me for example. I am a hard-
working student. In order to attain the accountant’s license, I studied day and
night. Finally, I passed the Certified Public Accountant’s license and I
specialize in Corporate Tax now.

What’s more, children should be budget-conscious, too. Making money is

not easy, and our parents have to put up with a great deal of pressures
everyday so children should not waste money. They should distinguish what
they want and what they need. If they have time, they can take on part-time
jobs. It can foster a sense of independence and lessen their parents’ financial
pressure.

To sum up, being a good son or daughter is not easy; we can try our best
to achieve our goals so that our parents don’t have to worry about our future.
It is the biggest contribution to society and our parents.

Word Count: 351

 Q15 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION
What are the important qualities of a good son or daughter? Use
specific and examples to support your answer. (Type 1 Question)

There are many crucial qualities of a great child. The core qualities of any
good son or daughter include being independent, diligent and budget-
conscious.

First of all, if a child is independent, his parents can have their own time
for their hobbies and careers. Self-reliant children can also share the load of
doing household chores so parents don’t have to be overloaded with too
many tasks every day. Another example of this is children going to school by
taking public transportation so that their parents don’t have to drop off and
pick them up every day. If children can be self-sufficient, parents gain
confidence in them and put greater trust in more responsible offspring. This
also strengthens their family bond because everyone contributes to the
family, which in turn limits arguments and being calculative over trivial
matters.

In addition, if a son or daughter is diligent, parents don’t have to worry

about the child’s academics. In fact, it is the student’s obligation to complete
his homework. If a youth is studious every day and sets high standards
proactively, he can not only acquire a wealth of knowledge, but also learn
how to be accountable for his grades. While reviewing or researching
projects, he can also broaden their horizons. Parents want to see a child
develop with a good head on his shoulders, which comes from being
conscientious. For instance, I burned the midnight oil for months and finally
attained my Certified Public Accountant’s license and I specialize in
Corporate Tax now.

What’s more, children should be budget-conscious, too. Making ends

meet is not easy, and because our parents have to put up with tons of pressure
every day both at work and at home, children should not squander their
pocket money. They should differentiate what they want from what they
need. If they have time, they can get a part-time job. This enables them to
foster a sense of financial independence and lessen their parents’ monetary
pressure. Personal experience has taught me that being thrifty leads to
wealth accumulation in the long run, which cannot happen if one
constantly wastes cash as a shopaholic.

To sum up, being a good son or daughter is not easy; but the happiness of
a family is directly related to how each member interacts with one another.
Therefore, we should do our part and ease our parents’ work load and
concerns.

Word Count: 397

Q15 CONTENT ANALYSIS

FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. acquire a wealth of knowledge

2. broaden their horizons
3. do our part
4. foster a sense of (financial) independence
5. strengthens their family bond
6. “budget conscious”
7. “burned the midnight oil”
8. “have a good head on his shoulders”
9. “in the long run”
10. “making ends meet”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. There are many crucial qualities of a great child. The core qualities of
any good son or daughter include being independent, diligent and
budget-conscious.
2. This also strengthens their family bond because everyone
contributes to the family, which in turn limits arguments and being
calculative over trivial matters.
3. If a youth is studious every day and sets high standards proactively,
he can not only acquire a wealth of knowledge, but also learn how
to be accountable for his grades.
4. This enables them to foster a sense of financial independence and
lessen their parents’ monetary pressure.
5. Personal experience has taught me that being thrifty leads to wealth
accumulation in the long run, which cannot happen if one
constantly wastes cash as a shopaholic.
6. To sum up, being a good son or daughter is not easy; but the
happiness of a family is directly related to how each member
interacts with one another.
FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. accountable
12. overloaded with
2. budget-conscious
13. proactively
3. calculative
14. self-reliant
4. chores
15. self-sufficient
5. conscientious
16. shopaholic
6. core
17. squander
7. differentiate
18. studious
8. diligent
19. thrifty
9. ease
20. trivial
10. offspring
21. wealth accumulation
11. obligation

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. What are the characteristics of a good parent? (Type 1 Question)

Q2. What are the traits of a good friend? (Type 1 Question)

Q3. What makes a good employee? (Type 1 Question)

 Q16 STUDENT’S VERSION

What do you consider to be the most important room in a house? Use

specific reasons and examples to support your opinion. (Type 1 Question)

The importance of the room is strongly related to the size and interior
layout of a house. If we live in a relative small space such as an apartment,
some rooms will be multifuction. For examle, we may have not enough space
for study room, so we will use dinning table to use lap-top or study. In my
opinion, the most important room is dining room. Except bed room, I spend
most of my time staying in dining room. Here is why.

In today's society, as a commuter, we live in a hustle and bustle city life

and work for nearly 10 hours a day, so we uaually eat at restaurant very
quickly and never spend quality time with family after work on the weekday.
However, I think it's not an ideal life, because the only time that we can be
with our family and soothen our daily stress is the dinner time. We should
keep our family relationship solid, thus we should have an ideal space to
achieve it. For me, it's definitely a dining room.

Second, through my personal experience, the most important social space

is not a living room, because most people sitting in front of television are just
like couch potato, and they are watching TV without talking with parents or
children. In addition, Many TV shows are shallow and contain vulgarity and
violence scenes. That's the reason why I think living room can't enhance
family relationship. On the countrary, dining room is a better space both for
socializing. I would leave more space for placing a large long dining table,
and it will be a good space for party, too.

Third, dining room can be multifunction, not only can we have

scrumptious home made dinner, but we can also have nice talk with family
when eating. What's more, dining table can be used to play chess or open-up
a family meeting. The height of dining table and chair is nearly the same as
nomal working space dimensions, it's means that reading, writing, and
drawing will not be problem. If we have a dining table, we can do a lot of
works.
 In sum, there are a great deal of advantages to having a dining room. Not
only can it be a social space, but it can also be a working space. If the dining
room could also strench throgh the balcony, that will be the perfect living
space.

Word Count: 403

 Q16 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION
What do you consider to be the most important room in a house? Use
specific reasons and examples to support your opinion. (Type 1 Question)

While every room in a house has its perks, without a doubt, the most
important room in a house for me is the dining room.

First of all, the dining room can be a sanctuary from the rush of city life
and be a place to relax. In today's society as a commuter, we live in the
hustle and bustle of the city and work for nearly 10 hours a day, so we
usually eat at restaurants quickly and never have a chance to unwind and
detach from the urban environment. However, I think that this isn’t an
ideal life, because we need to soothe our daily stress by taking time for
ourselves. The dining room provides a separate space to focus on one thing
and reflect on what’s important to us.

Second, the dining room can be multifunctional, as one can eat, read,
and engage in multiple activities. For instance, the dining table can be used
to play intellectually stimulating games such as chess or to be the focal
point for hosting parties. At any celebration, it’s the perfect place to expand
one’s social circle because everyone gathers around the island countertop
and snacks on food and beverages. The ambiance is upbeat because there’s
the aroma of freshly baked cookies and the company of great companions.
Whether you’re socializing at a gathering or playing board games in a group,
it’s a perfect way to improve one’s interpersonal skills.

Third, through my personal experience, the most important social space is

not actually the living room, because most people only sit in front of the
television like couch potatoes without much interaction with their parents,
spouse, or children. Rather than spending time viewing many TV shows that
are shallow and contain vulgarity, violence, and pornographic content, the
dining room doesn’t have such a distraction. This is the reason why I think
that living room can't enhance family relationships. On the contrary, a dining
room is a better space for socializing. Not only does it allow us to have a
scrumptious homemade dinner, but we can also have a heart to heart talk
with our family when eating. We should keep our family relationship solid,
thus we should have an ideal space to strengthen our family bond.

In sum, while it may not be the obvious choice to everyone choosing the
most important room in a house, the dining room has the more obvious
advantages. Keep in mind that it can it be a relaxing area or social hub, and
also function as a family bonding locale.

Word Count: 425

Q16 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. engage in multiple activities

2. expand one’s social circle
3. improve one’s interpersonal skills
4. rush of city life
5. soothe our daily stress
6. strengthen our family bond
7. “heart to heart talk”
8. “hustle and bustle”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. While every room in a house has its perks, without a doubt, the most
important room in a house for me is the dining room.
2. First of all, the dining room can be a sanctuary from the rush of city
life and be a place to relax.
3. Whether you’re socializing at a gathering or playing board games in a
group, it’s a perfect way to improve one’s interpersonal skills.
4. Third, through my personal experience, the most important social
space is not actually the living room, because most people only sit in
front of the television like couch potatoes without much interaction
with their parents, spouse, or children.
5. Rather than spending time viewing many TV shows that are shallow
and contain vulgarity, violence, and pornographic content, the
dining room doesn’t have such a distraction.
6. Not only does it allow us to have a scrumptious homemade dinner,
but we can also have a heart to heart talk with our family when
eating.
7. Keep in mind that it can it be a relaxing area or social hub, and also
function as a family bonding locale.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:
 1. ambiance 15. perks
2. aroma 16. pornographic
3. commuter 17. reflect on
4. company of 18. sanctuary
5. couch potatoes 19. scrumptious
6. detach 20. shallow
7. family bonding 21. socializing
8. focal point 22. social hub
9. hosting parties 23. spouse
10. ideal 24. unwind
11. intellectually stimulating 25. upbeat
12. interaction with 26. urban environment
13. locale 27. violence
14. multifunctional 28. vulgarity

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. Describe your dream house or apartment. Give details and examples
to support your reason. (Type 1 Question)

Q2. Some people like living in a house. Others prefer living in

apartments. Which do you prefer and why? (Type 2 Question)

Q3. Some apartments have many amenities and facilities such as a

swimming pool or a library. Which do you prefer and why? (Type 2
Question)
 Q17 STUDENT’S VERSION

A person you know is planning to move to your town or city. What do

you think this person would like and dislike about living there? Compare
the advantages and disadvantages. (Type 3 Question)

I am living in Taipei city for eight years since I am a college students.

Although Taipei is not a metropolitan city like Tokyo or London, but its basic
infrastructures are still complete, so it offer many public space for artistic,
athletic, or recreational activities. If a person is plainning to move here, I
believe he would like the city.

First, the traffic is very convenient in Taipei. Not only can he take a
public trasportation such as Metro system or bus, but he can also drive cars
and scooters. Scooters is a characteristics in Taiwan or some or the southen-
easten asia countries. Many large cities in other countries prohibit scooters in
the centeral city. Scooters is a fast mobility because it can go through many
alleys where cars or bus can't reach. In addition, riding bicycle is also another
way to commute in Taipei, and it's also economical and ecological. The
traffic fee such as fuel price and parking fee is not as expensive as other
metropolitan cities, thush both the public and personal mobilities are good
tools to travel.

Second, there are more and more coffee shop and exhibition hall in
Taipei, and it implies that Taipei citizens have an increasing artistic
appreciation. We have many museums with many various exhibits, often with
imported famous masterpieces temporarily displayed. Recently, Taipei city
goverments is emphasizing the culture creative industry, so they started to
renovate the old ruins to become a exhibition center such as Hua-shan and
Song-Shan Cultural park.

Third, there are a lot of night market and restaurants in Taipei. Because
Taiwan is an island, so Taiwanese are open-minded. We would like to
imported many foreign ingredients to make exotic scrumptious dishies. In
addition to Chinese food, the person can find Japanese, Spanish, American,
Tailand, Korean restaurant on the same road. And the person won't be worry
about getting fat, because there are more and more public fitness center, and
the entrance fee is very cheap.

However, living in Taipei city is not without drawbacks. Our traffic

congestion and noise on the rush hour is series. It rains a lot and hot in
summer because the terrain of the city is a bowl. Despite this, the advantages
of living in Taipei still outweigh its downsides. I still believe that the person
will fall in love with this city.

Word Count: 390

 Q17 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION
A person you know is planning to move to your town or city. What do
you think this person would like and dislike about living there? Compare
the advantages and disadvantages. (Type 3 Question)

Although Taipei is not a metropolitan city like Tokyo or London, its

basic infrastructure is still complete. While any urban center is going to
have certain drawbacks, overall, I believe a person planning to move here
would be pleased with all that the city has to offer.

First, the transportation is very convenient in Taipei. Not only can a

person take public transportation such as the Mass Rapid Transit or bus, but
he can also drive a car or ride a scooter. Riding scooters is a fast form of
mobility because they can maneuver through many alleys where cars or
busses can't get to, avoiding congestion. In addition, riding bicycles is also
another way to commute in Taipei, as it's also economical and ecological.
The variety of transportation caters to each individual’s needs.

Because Taiwan is an island, there are some limitations to living here as

well. For one, the air, water and noise pollution are challenging at times. The
common tradition of Taiwanese people burning “ghost money” throughout
the year to maintain their heritage contributes to municipal air pollution,
which is an unfortunate custom for newcomers to deal with. Along with this,
there have been several food scandal issues over the past few years involving
hygiene issues, toxic additives to staple foods, or improper handling and
storage. However, awareness of these concerns continues to grow, and
positive change is an eventuality. Nevertheless, exotic foods and imported
ingredients are becoming more commonplace, so immigrants may find it
easier to adapt as the city slowly becomes more international.

Despite these flaws, Taipei is still a wonderful place to reside in. There
has been an increase in exhibition halls in Taipei in recent years, and this
implies that Taipei citizens have an increasing artistic appreciation. As
such, citizens can appreciate great works of art without going abroad.
Recently, the Taipei city government has been emphasizing the creative
culture industry, so they started renovating old ruins to become exhibition
centers. Examples include the Hua-shan and Song-Shan Cultural parks. These
allow people to broaden their horizons and acquire a wealth of knowledge
in their leisure time.

While there are both benefits and shortcomings to living in Taipei, I think
that the advantages definitely outweigh the disadvantages. Living in Taipei
would be an eye-opening experience and anyone could take advantage of all
that Taipei has to offer.

Word Count: 392

Q17 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. acquire a wealth of knowledge

2. broaden their horizons
3. caters to each individual’s needs
4. maintain our/their heritage
5. “eye-opening”
6. “take advantage of”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. In addition, riding bicycles is also another way to commute in Taipei,

as it's also economical and ecological.
2. For one, the air, water and noise pollution of Taipei are challenging at
times.
3. However, awareness of these concerns continues to grow, and
positive change is an eventuality.
4. Nevertheless, exotic foods and imported ingredients are becoming
more commonplace, so immigrants may find it easier to adapt as the
city slowly becomes more international.
5. Despite these flaws, Taipei is still a wonderful place to reside in.
6. While there are both benefits and shortcomings to living in Taipei, I
think that the advantages definitely outweigh the disadvantages.
7. Living in Taipei would be an eye-opening experience and anyone
could take advantage of all that Taipei has to offer.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. artistic appreciation 13. improper handling

2. commute 14. infrastructure
3. congestion 15. maneuver
4. custom 16. metropolitan
5. drawbacks 17. mobility
6. ecological 18. municipal
7. economical 19. old ruins
 8. eventuality 20. pleased with
9. exotic 21. scandal
10. hygiene issues 22. staple foods
11. implies 23. storage
12. imported 24. toxic additives

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. If you could live in a city for a year, all expenses paid, which city
would you choose and why? (Type 1 Question)

Q2. Talk about your most memorable trip. What was especially
memorable thing about it? (Type 1 Question)

Q3. What is your favorite country? Explain why it is your favorite

country. (Type 1 Question)
 Q18 STUDENT’S VERSION

People work because they need money to live. What are some other
reasons that people work? Discuss one or more of these reasons. Use
specific examples and details to support your answer. (Type 1 Question)

Without a doubt, people work because they need money to live. Some
people can live without money because their basic needs are alreadly
fulfilled. So they can pursue more higer level requirement such as
achievement, self-realization or donation.

I believe that working can bring happiness to a person, if we can gain a

sense of accomplishment. Many people think that we will be successful only
if we do what we are really like, or something that we can showcase our
talent; However, I think that is not the only reason whick can make people to
become self-motivated. If a person can try hard to help a team to achieve the
goal and trust their supervisor, and the supervisor have confidnece on the
subordinates, it will create a good atmosphere to work. A good atmosphere
not only can create more values to company and it can also make people to
gain a sense of acommplishment.

In addition, some people work for money to live, but they work for
money to help some poor people in the countries that have no nature
resources and have been invaded often. More and more people join the NPO
or NGO, which are the non-profit and non-govermental organzations. They
want to make our society become better. For example, some countries have
no techique on planting, so the NPO will invites some agriculture professors
or experts to the countries to help the local people. For them, they are not
work for money, but they teach others how to make money to survive.

What's more, some people work for self-realization, they are born with
talent in art, music, performance or wrinting. They want to create touching
master piece to gain the awareness from the public. That's the reason why the
artist will hold an exhibitoin and pianist will perfom on a concert. Not only
can they make money, but they can also be appreciated from others. It will
also encourage them to keep creating new works.
 In brief, there are a great deal of reasons that people work in addition to
make money. Working for sense of achievement, self-realization or donation
is a positve way to face the hustle and bustle life, and I strongly believe that
we should not work because we just want to buy expensive and luxury goods,
and it will not make people happy in the end.

Word Count: 393

 Q18 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION

People work because they need money to live. What are some other
reasons that people work? Discuss one or more of these reasons. Use
specific examples and details to support your answer. (Type 1 Question)

Without a doubt, most people work because they need money to fuel
their living expenses. However, other reasons for engaging in meaningful
employment are achievement, charity, or wealth accumulation.

Working offers many social advantages, and I believe that working can
bring happiness for individuals and enable them to gain a sense of
achievement. Not only can a person develop and showcase his talent, but he
can also expand his social circle, which results in a myriad of benefits.
Studies have shown that employees that work isolated from home often
express desire to return to an office setting because they lack social
stimulation and camaraderie. A good atmosphere not only helps to
generate more value to company, but it can also be a confidence booster. In
other words, there is both an economic incentive and a strong social
component for doing work as well.

In addition, some people work for money to help out the underprivileged
living in impoverished communities around the world. Several countries in
Africa lack natural resources and are always affected by war. More and more
people are volunteering with NPO’s (Non Profit Organizations) or NGOs
(Non-Governmental Organizations), as they want to make our society
become better. For example, some countries possess minimal agricultural
techniques and distribution channels, so NPO’s will invite some agriculture
professors or experts to the countries to help the locals. These people don’t
work for money, but they teach others skills that will enhance their living
standards.

A third and major driving force for many already financially established
people is the desire to see a snowballing effect with their prosperity. The
constant pursuit of more earnings is like an unending game. Once a person
has seemingly limitless wealth, they sharpen their competitive edge,
exploring further opportunities for more affluence. As they establish
valuable connections within the community, they’re exposed to a rich array
of opportunities and the ability to explore new, creative ideas. It should come
as no surprise to learn that a famous person such as Jack Ma uses his fortune
to constantly innovate and collaborate with other successful people to
continually expand his empire.

In brief, there are many reasons why people work in addition to simply
making ends meet. Working for a sense of self-realization, charity or the
pursuit of prosperity is a powerful method of transforming oneself to have a
colorful and fulfilling life. Ultimately, we should remember that a good
character is better than a good fortune.

Word count: 409

Q18 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. a rich array of…

2. enhance their living standards
3. establish valuable connections
4. expand his social circle
5. express desire
6. fuel their living expenses
7. gain a sense of achievement
8. generate more value
9. showcase his talent
10. “a good character is better than a good fortune”
11. “a snowballing effect”
12. “making ends meet”
13. “sharpen their competitive edge”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. Without a doubt, most people work because they need money to fuel
their living expenses.
2. However, other reasons for engaging in meaningful employment are
achievement, charity, or wealth accumulation.
3. Working offers many social advantages, and I believe that working
can bring happiness for individuals and enable them to gain a sense
of achievement.
4. Not only can a person develop and showcase his talent, but he can
also expand his social circle, which results in a myriad of benefits.
5. Studies have shown that employees that work isolated from home
often express desire to return to an office setting because they lack
social stimulation and camaraderie.
6. In other words, there is both an economic incentive and a strong
social component for doing work as well.
7. In addition, some people work for money to help out the
underprivileged living in impoverished communities around the
world.
8. For example, some countries possess minimal agricultural
techniques and distribution channels, so a NPO will invite some
agriculture professors or experts to the countries to help the locals.
9. A third and major driving force for many already financially
established people is the desire to see a snowballing effect with their
prosperity.
10. Once a person has seemingly limitless wealth, they sharpen their
competitive edge, exploring further opportunities for more
affluence.
11. As they establish valuable connections within the community,
they’re exposed to a rich array of opportunities and the ability to
explore new, creative ideas.
12. It should come as no surprise to learn that a famous person such as
Jack Ma uses his fortune to constantly innovate and collaborate
with other successful people to continually expand his empire.
13. In brief, there are many reasons why people work in addition to
simply making ends meet.
14. Ultimately, we should remember that a good character is better than
a good fortune.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

12. impoverished
1. affluence
communities
2. agricultural
13. innovate
techniques
14. isolated
3. camaraderie
15. minimal
4. charity
16. prosperity
5. collaborate
17. pursuit
6. confidence booster
18. self-realization
7. constant pursuit
19. social component
8. distribution channels
20. social stimulation
9. economic incentive
21. underprivileged
10. empire
22. volunteering
11. fulfilling
23. wealth accumulation
 The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. Do you prefer a high paying job that is stressful or a lower paying job
that leaves you more time for your personal hobbies? (Type 2 Question)

Q2. What kind of career do you want to have? Please include details and
examples. (Type 1 Question)

Q3. What would you do if you won $100 million in the lottery? (Type 1
Question)
 Q19 STUDENT’S VERSION

Students at universities often have a choice of places to live. They may

choose to live in university dormitories, or they may choose to live in
apartments in the community. Compare the advantages of living in
university housing with the advantages of living in an apartment in the
community. Where would you prefer to live? Give reasons for your
preference. (Type 3 Question)

Students at university often given rights to choose where they want to

live. Both of living on campus or off campus have its advantages and
drawbacks. In my openion, I prefer living on campus as a freshmen or junior.
Here is why.

First of all, university students not only have to concentrate on academy,

but also need to engage in clubs to expend social circle or nurture other
abilities such as leadership or teamwork with peers. Therefore, Living in
school will be much convenient when we have to join a meeting or discuss or
exchange notes taken in the class with classmates.

Second, every people have different habits on living. Some people have
better hygiene babits, while others may never clearn their room when they
lived with their parents. Living in campus domitories can help a person learn
to co-habitat with others, and form a sense of tolerence. Students will learn
that every people has his drawbacks due to different background. If we want
to keep in good relationship with them. We should change ourselves attitude
also. In addition, It's especially important when we hack into the real world.

Finally, although living in the near community is usually more expensive.

Students may have to take a part time jop to pay for the rent. However, it may
also help a person to hone a sense of independence. We can also live on our
own pace, and won't to compromise with others. But I think the benefits to
living in school still outweigh its disadvantages. Living is domitory is
economic, so studensts want to work and can participate more social
activities. Furthermore, when we feel lonely or boring, our roomate can keep
us company.
 In essence, there are a great deal of benefits to living on campus. For
students , living on caompus is a golden time to to get aquented with their
peers. They should take the advantage of the chance to expend their social
circle and find the person who have the same dream and goal to share
experience and co-work.

Word Count: 341

 Q19 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION

Students at universities often have a choice of places to live. They may

choose to live in university dormitories, or they may choose to live in
apartments in the community. Compare the advantages of living in
university housing with the advantages of living in an apartment in the
community. Where would you prefer to live? Give reasons for your
preference. (Type 3 Question)

When it comes to accommodation, some people think that university

students should live on campus. Others argue that they should live off
campus and find their own accommodations. While both perspectives have
merits, I would prefer living in school dormitories.

Living on campus offers many advantages, the first and foremost of

which is gaining real-world learning experience. Some people are more
hygienic while others don’t mind layers of dust covering their floor. Living
in dormitories can help a person learn to cohabitate with other peers, and
build up respect and tolerance. Students learn that every person has quirks
due to different upbringings. We should forge a great relationship with our
roommates by learning about concession and diplomacy. This skill is
especially important when we break into the real world.

On the other hand, university students not only have to concentrate on

their academics, but also need to expand their social circle. Living off
campus gives students the opportunity to learn responsibilities like paying
rent, bills, and groceries costs, as well as establishing social relationships
outside of academia. As such, they learn to not live beyond their means.
This also enables them to hone a sense of independence. A conveniently
located apartment nearby campus gives students more flexibility to do a part
time job or participate in social activities such as seeing movies,
volunteering, and going to exhibitions away from student life, which is a
great way to release the pressure valve.

Despite this, personal experience has taught me that while learning about
daily responsibilities is a good thing, there will be plenty of time for that after
graduation. While in school, a student’s focus should not be divided while
chasing academic advancement. Furthermore, living is the dormitory is
more economical. Adding to this, when we feel lonely or bored, our
roommates can keep us company. By interacting with their peers, we can
enhance other abilities such as leadership or teamwork skills. For instance,
one can join intramural volleyball or interclass chess competitions. Therefore,
living in school will be much more conducive to establishing a strong
network of fellow students.

In essence, the benefits of living in dormitories far outweigh the perks of

living off campus. For students, living on campus is a golden time to
socialize and get acquainted with their peers.

Word count: 382

Q19 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. enhance other abilities

2. expand their social circle
3. get acquainted with their peers
4. hone a sense of independence
5. “a golden time”
6. “keep us company”
7. “break into the real world”
8. “(not) live beyond their means”
9. “release the pressure valve”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. When it comes to accommodation, some people think that university

students should live on campus. Others argue that they should live
off campus and find their own accommodations.
2. While both perspectives have merits, I would prefer living in school
dormitories.
3. Living on campus offers many advantages, the first and foremost of
which is gaining a real-world learning experience.
4. On the other hand, university students not only have to concentrate on
their academics, but also need to expand their social circle.
5. Living off campus gives students the opportunity to learn
responsibilities like paying rent, bills, and groceries costs, as well as
establishing social relationships outside of academia.
6. This also enables them to hone a sense of independence. Despite
this, personal experience has taught me that while learning about
daily responsibilities is a good thing, there will be plenty of time for
that after graduation.
7. In essence, the benefits of living in dormitories far outweigh the perks
of living off campus.
 FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

7. diplomacy
1. academics
2. academia 8. hygienic
3. academic advancement 9. socialize
4. cohabitate 10. tolerance
5. concession 11. upbringing
6. conducive 12. quirks

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. Some students prefer to work on campus. Others prefer to find jobs
off campus. Which do you prefer and why? (Type 2 Question)

Q2. Some students prefer to live in single private dormitories while

others prefer to share a room with others. Which do you prefer and why?
(Type 2 Question)

Q3. Some college students prefer to live in single-sex dormitories. Others

prefer to live in co-ed (mixed gender) dormitories. Which do you prefer and
why? (Type 2 Question)
 Q20 STUDENT’S VERSION

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Businesses

should do anything they can to make a profit. Use specific reasons and
examples to support your position. (Type 4 Question)

After the industrial revolution, more and more people start working in a
big company. A company has many duties both for the society and for their
employees. Thus, I think the statement that businesses should do anything
they can do to make a profit is almost right, but how can them give feedback
to the stakeholders including the employees is even important. Here is why.

A company should make a profit every quater and every year in case of
backrupt. Hundreds and thousands of workers are living by the stipend from
the company. Once the company fail, how can there jobless workers find
another job if they have already lose competitiveness in the society.
Therefore, the manager have the duty to maintain the steady operation by
making more profits.

Second, we living in a rapid changing society. Some popular industry

may lose competitiveness in the near future. If the company doesn't have this
awareness to follow up the trend, their market will be deprived, and may also
be annexed by other big company of foreign countries. The esteem of a
nation will lose, and they shows a plummet of a country. As a result, business
should always expand themselves by making profits.

Finally, companys are obligated to give feedback to our society because

they made pollution and consum more social resources then the indivisuals.
They should definitely pay more taxes to our governments to enhace the
infrastructure and welfare of the public. Their prosperity usually exhibits the
promising of the country. Consquently, a company should make effort to take
the responsibility to earn as much money as possible.

In sum, although some people assert that businesses should always take
the social responsibilities, I think they should do it on the promise of they
have already made profits. If the company can't make profits, they are hardly
to take care of their employees, their public, and their nation.

Word Count: 317

 Q20 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Businesses

should do anything they can to make a profit. Use specific reasons and
examples to support your position. (Type 4 Question)

When it comes to businesses doing anything they can to make a profit,

some people agree with this notion, while others argue that the opposite is
true. I believe that companies should always try their best to boost their
revenue.

Being profitable offers many advantages, the first and foremost of which
is having more opportunities and resources for continual innovation. We
live in a rapidly changing society, and competitiveness is an important
quality to maintain. Hence, innovation and leading the pack should be a key
driving factor. This, in turn, leads to higher cash flow. For instance, Apple
Inc. is world-renowned for its consistent cutting edge developments. As a
result, competitors have to always stay on their toes in order to not lose too
much of their market share to such technological pioneers. This demonstrates
perfectly how businesses should always expand their boundaries and think
outside the box in order to generate profits and gain a competitive edge.

Second, a company that is stable becomes a pillar of society, one which

provides jobs and social security to citizens. Hundreds and thousands of
workers live within an economic network subsidized by secure firms. If the
enterprise falls apart, unemployed workers are then unable to fuel their
living expenses and take care of their families. Therefore, the CEO and top-
tier managers have a social duty to maintain steady operations in the
company by making continually increasing profits. One has to look no further
than the automotive industry in America collapsing to see the effects this
had in major cities like Detroit. Thus, a corporation has many duties both
within society and towards their employees.

We must keep in mind that there are some valid contentions against
companies’ unchecked economic expansion, including their likelihood of
causing pollution or consuming more social resources than individuals do.
Nevertheless, this criticism is offset by the fact that these organizations pay
more taxes to our governments to enhance the infrastructure and welfare of
the urban centers. As an illustration of this, the UPS company donates a
whopping 5.7% (55 million US dollars) of its profits to United Way annually.
Without a healthy economic climate, sizeable donations to charities like this
that help all residents wouldn’t be readily available. Consequently, a
company should take on the responsibility of earning as much money as
possible.

In sum, there is little doubt that companies should do anything they can to
enhance profits. The economic well-being of a nation is directly related to
nurturing continually profitable businesses.

Word Count: 417

Q20 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. boost their revenue

2. expand their boundaries
3. fuel their living expenses
4. gain a competitive edge
5. key driving factor
6. rapidly changing society
7. “cutting edge”
8. “think outside the box”
9. “leading the pack”
10. “stay on their toes”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. When it comes to businesses doing anything they can to make a

profit, some people agree with this notion, while others argue that
the opposite is true.
2. Being profitable offers many advantages, the first and foremost of
which is having more opportunities and resources for continual
innovation.
3. Hence, innovation and leading the pack should be a key driving
factor.
4. This, in turn, leads to higher cash flow.
5. As a result, competitors have to always stay on their toes in order to
not lose too much of their market share to such technological
pioneers.
6. This demonstrates perfectly how businesses should always expand
their boundaries and think outside the box in order to generate
profits and gain a competitive edge.
7. One has to look no further than the automotive industry in America
collapsing to see the effects this had in major cities like Detroit.
8. We must keep in mind that there are some valid contentions against
companies’ unchecked economic expansion, including their
likelihood of causing pollution or consuming more social resources
 than individuals do.
9. Nevertheless, this criticism is offset by the fact that these
organizations pay more taxes to our governments to enhance the
infrastructure and welfare of the urban centers.
10. As an illustration of this, the UPS company donates a whopping
5.7% (55 million US dollars) of its profits to United Way annually.
11. Without a healthy economic climate, sizeable donations to charities
like this that help all residents wouldn’t be readily available.
12. In sum, there is little doubt that companies should do anything they
can to enhance profits.
13. The economic well-being of a nation is directly related to nurturing
continually profitable businesses.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. automotive
industry 14. profit
2. cash flow 15. rapidly changing society
3. continual 16. sizeable
innovation 17. social resources
4. criticism 18. social security
5. economic climate 19. stable
6. enterprise 20. subsidize
7. firms 21. top-tier
8. generate profits 22. unchecked economic
9. infrastructure expansion
10. innovation 23. welfare
11. nurturing 24. world renowned
12. pillar of society 25. valid contentions
13. pioneers

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. If you could start a business, what type of business would it be?
Please give reasons for your choice. (Type 1 Question)
 Q2. Businesses should donate 10% of profits to charity every year. Do
you agree or disagree with this statement? (Type 4 Question)

Q3. Which kind of business do you think would be most successful in

your country and why? (Type 1 Question)
 Q21 STUDENT’S VERSION

A friend of yours has received some money and plans to use all of it
either to go on vacation or to buy a car. Your friend has asked you for
advice. Compare your friend’s two choices and explain which one you
think your friend should choose. Use specific reasons and details to support
your choice. (Type 3 Question)

There are many objects and experiences that people think they should
own in the lifetime. Both of going on vacation to far country or buying a car
are also my goal. If my friend have to choose which one should own first,
without doubt, I will tell him the former. Here is why.

We always to have a dream that we can travel around the world.

Comparing the price which is enough to buy a car, it can also be spent on
traveling to many countries. However, when we grow up, we can hardly to
take the long trip due to the career, children and the health of our parents. If
we are still young, we don't have such consideration. Why can't we drop out
of every thing temperily to take a greatest trip in our life. On the other hand,
we can have car every time in our life once we earn enough money.

Second, the memory of taking the trip in last till we leave the world,
while our fancy car will be worn out in a decades. We should only buy a
digital camera with a relatively low price than car on the trip, so we can
treasure all the great moment in our life. But the car on the otherhand, even
it's still usable after ten years, we can't guarentee it's fuel comsumption is still
efficienct. The unsatisfaction will urge us to have a new model in the end.

Third, I need my friend to think again that does car still play an important
role in today's society? We have conveniet mass rapid metro system. It's
economic and environment friendly. In addition, the bicycle renting system is
growing popular in Taipei city. Riding bicycle to commute can help us to
lower cholesterol and keep us fit. Owing a car will increase our expense on
fossil fuel and stucking in the terrible traffic conjestion.

In sum, if my friend have enough money, I will advise him to take the
long trip immediately because he may have seldom worries and consideration
in the current stage of life. In additon, it's always not been late to have a
dream car later than forty.

Word Count: 364

 Q21 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION
A friend of yours has received some money and plans to use all of it
either to go on vacation or to buy a car. Your friend has asked you for
advice. Compare your friend’s two choices and explain which one you
think your friend should choose. Use specific reasons and details to support
your choice. (Type 3 Question)

When it comes to how to use money as a gift, some people think that one
should spend it on a vacation. Others argue that buying a car is the better
option. While both perspectives have merit, I would advise my friend to go
on a vacation.

Traveling offers many advantages, the first and foremost of which is

broadening one’s horizons. Many people dream of traveling around the
world. It is relatively easier to travel when we are young, when we can put
everything aside to go travelling and soak in the sunshine. Also, this trip
would enable us to expand our social circle and immerse ourselves in the
local cultures. Personal experience has taught me that time away from our
fast-paced society and hectic schedules really revitalizes us. Taking a trip
allows us to face work pressure with renewed vigor.

On the other hand, having a car opens up a whole new world of

possibilities. Although my city has a mass rapid transit system which is quite
economical, it limits travel to within the city. Having a car is a way to escape
the hustle and bustle of the city. For instance, with a car, one can take trips to
nearby beaches to go surfing or go hiking in beautiful mountain areas. Not
only can a person take in some breathtaking scenery, but they can also
lower cholesterol and boost their immune systems. Having a car provides
the chance to have frequent getaways.

Overall, the fond memories of an amazing trip would definitely outlast

the immediate gratification of owning one’s own car. It is widely
acknowledged that new cars depreciate within a year after purchase, just as
quickly as the novelty of owning one. However, we should keep in mind that
memories last a lifetime. With a reasonably priced digital camera, my friend
could snap pictures of great moments to share with friends. While both
choices require spending money, a car requires continual spending on
maintenance and fuel consumption. All in all, owning a car is a liability
which leads to always putting a dent in your pocket and getting stuck in
traffic congestion. Getting off the beaten track and investing in a vacation,
however, is something that lasts a lifetime.

In sum, the advantages of going on a trip far outweigh those of

purchasing a car. Ultimately, it would color his life and the fond memories
would last a lifetime.

Word Count: 402

Q21 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. boost their immune systems

2. broadening one’s horizons
3. color his life
4. expand our social circle
5. immerse ourselves in the local culture
6. lower cholesterol
7. opens up a whole new world of possibilities
8. put everything aside
9. “hustle and bustle”
10. “keep in mind”
11. “off the beaten track”
12. “putting a dent in your pocket”
13. “soak in the sunshine”
14. “take in some breathtaking scenery”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. When it comes to how to use money as a gift, some people think that
one should spend it on a vacation. Others argue that buying a car is
the better option.
2. While both perspectives have merit, I would advise my friend to go
on a vacation.
3. Traveling offers many advantages, the first and foremost of which is
broadening one’s horizons.
4. It is relatively easier to travel when we are young, when we can put
everything aside to go travelling and soak in the sunshine.
5. Personal experience has taught me that time away from our fast-
paced society and hectic schedules really revitalizes us.
6. time away from our fast-paced society and hectic schedules really
revitalizes me.
7. Not only can a person take in some breathtaking scenery, but they
can also lower cholesterol and boost their immune system.
8. It is widely acknowledged that new cars depreciate within a year
 after purchase, just as quickly as the novelty of owning one.
9. All in all, owning a car is a liability which leads to always putting a
dent in your pocket and getting stuck in traffic congestion.
10. In sum, the advantages of going on a trip far outweigh those of
purchasing a car.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. breathtaking 10. gratification

2. depreciate 11. hectic schedules
3. economical 12. liability
4. enable 13. maintenance
5. fast-paced society 14. novelty
6. fond memories 15. outlast
7. fulfill 16. renewed vigor
8. fuel consumption 17. snap pictures
9. getaways 18. traffic congestion

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. Do you prefer to save money in the bank or spend it on enhancing

experiences such as traveling or studying abroad? (Type 2 Question)

Q2. Would you prefer getting a lump sum of cash for retirement or
monthly pension from your company? (Type 2 Question)

Q3. “Money is the most powerful tool in the world.” Do you agree or
disagree with this statement? (Type 4 Question)
 Q22 STUDENT’S VERSION

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People should

sometimes do things that they do not enjoy doing. Use specific reasons and
examples to support your answer. (Type 4 Question)

Unquestionably, I strongly believe that people should sometimes do

things that they don’t enjoy doing.

First of all, we can’t always stay in our comfort zones. As we want to

enhance our interpersonal skills, we have to improve ourselves to learn
another kind of knowledge. It can not only broaden our horizons but also
enable us to acquire a sea of knowledge. Take my math teacher for example.
He is good at math; however, he doesn’t want to just be a math teacher in the
school. He found a technological company. Everything is new and difficult
for him, but he still has to learn it so that he can operate a company
profitably. His endeavor is now a huge success.

What’s more, when we do things that we don’t enjoy doing, we might

feel incompetent and bored. However, if we can understand the points and
apply in our jobs, it can help us get a sense of achievement and some
competitive edge. Take me for example, I major in Computer Science and
Business in college. Although doing a double major is extremely tedious and
challenging, I knew that it would eventually pay off. Finally, I graduated with
honors and a double major certificate.

In addition, being skilled at something requires time and effort. By

learning or doing something we don’t like, we can acquire a wealth of
information in the process. We can network and be exposed to a rich array of
people and experiences .This will help us to expand our social circle.
Whether we encounter work or personal issues, we have the resources to
easily solve them.

To sum up, although there are drawbacks to doing something we don’t

like, the benefits still outweigh the shortcomings. We can’t imagine a dull life
and not learning something new. We should always keep an open mind and
strive to enhance our abilities.

Word Count: 312

 Q22 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People should

sometimes do things that they do not enjoy doing. Use specific reasons and
examples to support your answer. (Type 4 Question)

Unquestionably, I strongly believe that people should sometimes do

things that they don’t enjoy doing. In this competitive society, the necessity
for stepping out of our comfort zone seems clear.

First of all, being skilled at something requires time and effort. The effort
spent to acquire this skill can not only broaden our horizons but also enable
us to acquire a sea of knowledge. Take my Math Professor Mr. Hu for
example, who is highly respected for his work. Despite this, he wanted to
achieve more in his life. He dived into new territories and persevered.
Now, he is operating an extremely profitable enterprise. His endeavor is a
huge success. It should come as no surprise to learn that all successful
entrepreneurs ventured out of the security of routine life.

In addition, we can’t always stay in a bubble of complacency. If we

want to enhance our interpersonal skills, we have to improve ourselves to
learn other kinds of knowledge. In the process of challenging ourselves and
becoming more interesting people, we can network and be exposed to a rich
array of people and experiences. This will help us to expand our social
circle. When we encounter work or personal issues, we will have the
resources to easily solve them. A famous example of someone constantly
pushing the envelope is Elon Musk. His unparalleled success and having
several multi-billion dollar companies by his 40’s is due to his drive to
explore various kinds of knowledge. He’s constantly surrounding himself
with leading experts in diverse fields, and continually overcoming massive
challenges. The success of his empire is directly related to his innovation and
persistence in associating with other great minds.

While some people say it’s good to develop a routine, it’s not a great way
to become a well-rounded citizen. It’s obvious that when we do things that
we don’t enjoy doing, we might feel incompetent and bored. When we excel
at something new, we feel accomplished and possibly gain a competitive
edge. For example, I double majored in Computer Science and Business.
Although doing a double major is extremely tedious and challenging, I knew
that it would eventually pay off. Finally, I graduated with honors and got a
fulfilling and high-paying job.

To sum up, gone are the days when we can rely on a “stable” paycheck.
We should not be content with a dull life. Instead, we should keep an open
mind and strive to enhance our abilities if we want to sow the seeds of
success.

Word Count: 418

Q22 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. acquire a sea of knowledge

2. associating with other great minds
3. be exposed to a rich array of people
4. broaden our horizons
5. dived into new territories
6. enhance our abilities
7. enhance our interpersonal skills
8. expand our social circle
9. gain a competitive edge
10. overcoming massive challenges
11. stay in a bubble of complacency
12. strive to…
13. ventured out of the security of routine life
14. “keep an open mind”
15. “pay off”
16. “pushing the envelope”
17. “sow the seeds of success”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. Unquestionably, I strongly believe that people should sometimes do

things that they don’t enjoy doing.
2. In this competitive society, the necessity for stepping out of our
comfort zone seems clear.
3. It can not only broaden our horizons but also enable us to acquire
a sea of knowledge.
4. It should come as no surprise to learn that all successful entrepreneurs
ventured out of the security of routine life.
5. If we want to enhance our interpersonal skills, we have to improve
ourselves to learn other kinds of knowledge.
6. A famous example of someone constantly pushing the envelope is
Elon Musk.
 7. His unparalleled success and having several multi-billion dollar
companies by his 40’s is due to his drive to explore various kinds of
knowledge.
8. The success of his empire is directly related to his innovation and
persistence in associating with other great minds.
9. While some people say it’s good to develop a routine, it’s not a great
way to become a well-rounded citizen.
10. To sum up, gone are the days when we can rely on a “stable”
paycheck.
11. We should not be content with a dull life.
12. Instead, we should keep an open mind and strive to enhance our
abilities if we want to sow the seeds of success.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. content 8. tedious
2. enable 9. network
3. encounter 10. paycheck
4. endeavor 11. persevered
5. excel at 12. profitable
6. fulfilling 13. unparalleled success
7. incompetent 14. well-rounded

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. Some people prefer to live a simple, carefree life while others
welcome new challenges. Which lifestyle do you prefer and why? (Type 2
Question)

Q2. “One should always go out of his comfort zone and learn new things
even if he is satisfied with life.” Do you agree or disagree with this
statement? (Type 4 Question)

Q3. “One should go where the job opportunities are, even if that means
leaving his comfort zone.” Do you agree or disagree with this statement?
(Type 4 Question)
 Q23 STUDENT’S VERSION
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Always telling the truth is the most important aspect in any relationship
between people. (Type 4 Question)

Although we shouldn't tell a lie to others, we can't always tell the truth,
too. Under some situation, we have to take many things into consideration,
and we may tell a whith lie. Therefore, I partially agree the statement that
people should always tell the truth in any relationship. Here is why.

First, sometimes we can't tell the truth because we don't want our family
or friends feel depressed. They may expect us to give an positive response to
their question. For example, when my mom cook for an entire day to prepare
the abundant scrumptious dinner, she may ask all of us that the taste of the
dishes. We should give her encouraging and confidence for her hard working
for us.

Second, if we always tell the truth, we can also lose the competitiveness
in some cases. In the competitive job market, it is hard to pursuit a good job.
The employees may evaluate our cridential strictly. In order to make a
beautiful job package, we have to try hard to showcase our talent and
achievements even we may not as excellent as we think about ourselves. But
I think we can also take it for granted, because we set a higher goal for
ourselves, and it will also force us to make progress quickly.

However, we should always remind us to tell the truth in most cases in

our life. If our friends find that we are cheating them, they will feel depressed
or even angry. Some people like to listen to the truth as oppose to a white lie.
They want to know why they failed and need true advices for them to
improve themselves. If we tell a lie becasue we want them to feel bettter, we
may also limit their capibility. What's more, our kindness may also make a
person become arrogant because they never know their drawbacks. In the
mose case of a large company, the supervisors are usually very blinded and
only believe themselves because their subordinate don't tell the truth due to
the fear of being fired.
 In sum, we have to tell a white lie in some cases, and it will help us live
in harmony with others; However, I still believe that honesty is the best
policy. If we get used to tell a lie, no one will believe us, and we may lose
credits forever.

Word Count: 396

 Q23 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Always telling the truth is the most important aspect in any relationship
between people. (Type 4 Question)

While overall we should live honest lives and be accountable for our
words, there are many circumstances that require bending the truth in order
to make relationships work.

First, sometimes we can't tell the truth because we don't want to hurt our
family or friends. The truth hurts and they may get depressed as a result of
us being too forthright. They may be expecting to hear positive news so the
truth could break their hearts. For example, when my mom spends her entire
day in the kitchen to prepare a nutritious and scrumptious dinner for us, she
may ask us how the food tastes. In light of her hard work, we should boost
her confidence, show our gratitude and compliment her culinary skills,
even if it’s not an example of five-star cuisine.

Second, personal experience has taught me that if we always tell the truth,
we can also lose competitiveness in the workplace. In the competitive job
market, it is hard to land a good job, as employers strictly evaluate our
credentials. In order to create a great first impression and maximize our
chances of getting our foot in the door, we have to try our hardest to
showcase our talent and boast about our achievements even if we are not
as outstanding as we make ourselves out to be. The benefit of creating this
image is that we push ourselves out of our comfort zone to achieve greater
accomplishments.

Some people argue that honesty is the best policy, and they’re correct
when it comes to really vital issues within the community. However, a
person needs to understand the difference between a white lie and outright
deception. While we should always remind ourselves to tell the truth most of
the time, telling small lies are actually important to grease the social gears.
Many social niceties include complimenting people on their new fashion
choices or hairstyles, even if they’re questionable choices. Being brutally
honest about trivial matters would not only diminish your social circles, but
also limit your social or work potentials.

In essence, telling a white lie is acceptable if it helps us to live in

harmony with others. However, we cannot make lying a habit or we will lose
credibility within our circle of friends and relatives. Walking the line
between falsehood and truth is a tricky one, but it’s a crucial skill for
navigating through life.

Word Count: 399

Q23 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. achieve greater accomplishments

2. boast about our achievements
3. boost her confidence
4. create a great first impression
5. evaluate our credentials
6. land a good job
7. live in harmony
8. lose credibility
9. lose competitiveness
10. maximize our chances of
11. showcase our talent
12. “bending the truth”
13. “getting our foot in the door”
14. “grease the social gears”
15. “honesty is the best policy”
16. “navigating through life”
17. “the truth hurts”
18. “walking the line between...”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. While overall we should live honest lives and be accountable for our
words, there are many circumstances that require bending the truth
in order to make relationships work.
2. In light of her hard work, we should boost her confidence, show our
gratitude and compliment her culinary skills, even if it’s not an
example of five-star cuisine.
3. Second, personal experience has taught me that if we always tell the
truth, we can also lose competitiveness in the workplace.
4. In order to create a great first impression and maximize our chances
of getting our foot in the door, we have to try our hardest to
showcase our talent and boast about our achievements even if we
 are not as outstanding as we make ourselves out to be.
5. The benefit of creating this image is that we push ourselves out of our
comfort zone to achieve greater accomplishments.
6. Some people argue that honesty is the best policy, and they’re correct
when it comes to really vital issues within the community.
7. Being brutally honest about trivial matters would not only diminish
your social circles, but also limit your social or work potentials.
8. In essence, telling a white lie is acceptable if it helps us to live in
harmony with others.
9. Walking the line between falsehood and truth is a tricky one, but it’s
a crucial skill for navigating through life.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. acceptable 11. falsehood

2. brutally honest 12. first impression
3. circle of friends 13. forthright
4. comfort zone 14. gratitude
5. compliment 15. nutritious
6. crucial 16. outright deception
7. cuisine 17. scrumptious
8. culinary skills 18. social niceties
9. diminish 19. trivial
10. depressed 20. vital

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. “White lies are harmless as they don’t really hurt people.” Do you
agree or disagree with this statement? (Type 4 Question)

Q2. Describe a trustworthy person in your life. What is it about this

person that makes you trust him or her? (Type 1 Question)

Q3. Who do you go to for honest opinions regarding your life or career?
(Type 1 Question)
 Q24 STUDENT’S VERSION
Is it better to enjoy your money when you earn it or is it better to save
your money for some time in the future? Use specific reasons and examples
to support your opinion. (Type 2 Question)

Without a doubt, it’s mandatory for me to save money in the future,

because we can’t predict what happen in the future.
First of all, it is said that we should repair our house before it rains. In
other words, we can’t spend all money every month because we have to
consider our future. We should be budget-conscious, and we can’t be the
shopaholic. Before we buy anything, we have to consider it again and again.
We just buy we need and not we want. It’s a very crucial notion.

In addition, when we want achieve a goal, it always have to spend much

money such as buying a house and studying abroad. As we buying a house,
we should pay a lot of money. If we don’t save money, we can’t buy it so that
we can’t have our own house to have a stable life. Besides, If we want to
study abroad, we have to pay hefty expenses so we have to save money to
fulfill the goal. Studying abroad can broaden our horizons and acquire a
wealth of knowledge, and we can also immerse ourselves in different culture.
After we get the diploma, we will not only get a sense of achievement but
also gain the competitive edge.

What’s more, when we spend all money every month, we can get the
happiness. However, the feeling of happiness is just a moment. We have to
be more concerned about our retirement and health. We should save money
for our old-aged life because we don’t know whether we will suffer from
serious disease or not. If we have to pay the medical expenses, it will be an
important expense. We have to take our old-aged life into account before we
want to enjoy our money.

In sum, although spending all money can make ourselves happy, if we

don’t save money, if will be dangerous and we don’t have the safety. Saving
money is very critical for everyone.

Word Count: 328

 Q24 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION
Is it better to enjoy your money when you earn it or is it better to save
your money for some time in the future? Use specific reasons and examples
to support your opinion. (Type 2 Question)

When it comes to money handling issues, some people prefer living

paycheck to paycheck. Others argue that saving it as an emergency fund is
better. Without a doubt, it’s preferable to be thrifty and budget-conscious
because no one knows what the future holds.

First of all, it is said that we should save money for a rainy day. In other
words, we need to have sizeable financial resources readily available in the
event of accidents, health complications, or sudden unemployment. For
example, medical expenses can quickly become a mind-blowing amount of
money. Also, personal experience has taught me that stashing away some
cash to fuel living expenses during an unemployment period is critical. There
are countless examples in the media of people lacking financial foresight,
and getting into trouble as a result. We should always make hay while the
sun shines.

In addition, without budgeting money for milestones, important life

events like studying abroad, acquiring a home, and raising children become
out of reach. When we want to achieve a goal and get ahead in life, it
sometimes requires spending a lump sum of money. As another example, if
we want to study abroad, we have to pay hefty expenses so we have to save
money to fulfill this goal. Studying abroad can broaden our horizons and
enable us to acquire a wealth of knowledge, while at the same time let us be
immersed in different cultures. After obtaining an international diploma,
we not only get a sense of achievement but also gain a competitive edge.
All of these benefits would be unobtainable without a cautious approach to
spending.

There are those who believe that we should live in the moment and spend
our money as quickly as we get it. Although the joy that comes from
consumerism can give us temporary happiness, we have to keep in mind that
retirement is right around the corner. Having a comfortable amount of cash
in the bank account gives one peace of mind. Take my uncle for example.
He retired at the age of 40 on compound interest and stock dividends. His
savings brought him freedom. Gone are the days when we can rely solely on
a pension.

In sum, if we don’t save up while we are young, in our old age, it will be
hard to make ends meet. Lacking adequate funds denies us a sense of
security. As such, the necessity for saving money seems clear.

Word Count: 407

Q24 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. a cautious approach to...

2. acquire a wealth of knowledge
3. broaden our horizons
4. denies us a sense of security
5. gain a competitive edge
6. get a sense of achievement
7. gives one peace of mind
8. immersed in different cultures
9. lacking financial foresight
10. spending a lump sum of money
11. “get ahead in life”
12. “keep in mind”
13. “living paycheck to paycheck”
14. “live in the moment”
15. “make hay while the sun shines”
16. “make ends meet”
17. “out of reach”
18. “right around the corner”
19. “save money for a rainy day”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. When it comes to money handling issues, some people prefer living

paycheck to paycheck. Others argue that saving it as an emergency
fund is better.
2. Without a doubt, it’s preferable to be thrifty and budget-conscious
because no one knows what the future holds.
3. First of all, it is said that we should save money for a rainy day.
4. Also, personal experience has taught me that stashing aside some
cash to fuel living expenses during an unemployment period is
critical.
5. There are countless examples in the media of people lacking
 financial foresight, and getting into trouble as a result.
6. In addition, without budgeting money for milestones, important life
events like studying abroad, acquiring a home, and raising children
become out of reach.
7. As another example, if we want to study abroad, we have to pay
hefty expenses so we have to save money to fulfill this goal.
8. Studying abroad can broaden our horizons and enable us to acquire
a wealth of knowledge, while at the same time let us be immersed
in different cultures.
9. After obtaining an international diploma, we not only get a sense of
achievement but also gain a competitive edge.
10. There are those who believe that we should live in the moment
and spend our money as quickly as we get it.
11. Gone are the days when we can rely solely on pension.
12. As such, the necessity for saving money seems clear.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. acquiring 8. mind-blowing
2. adequate 9. obtaining
3. budget-conscious 10. pension
4. compound interest 11. sizeable
5. critical 12. stock dividends
6. hefty expenses 13. thrifty
7. milestones 14. unobtainable

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. Which is more important? Saving money in the bank or spending it

on “enriching experiences” such as study or travel? (Type 2 Question)

Q2. Would you prefer to live a humble lifestyle or a luxurious one if you
could afford to? (Type 2 Question)

Q3. Different people have different ways of managing their income. How
would you budget your salary? (Type 1 Question)
 Q25 STUDENT’S VERSION
Talk about the educational system in your country and what you could
do to improve it. (Type 1 Question)

Without a doubt, the educational system is different in every country.

There are many advantages and disadvantages in my country’s educational
system.

First of all, the East Asian economic miracle comes from hard work, hard
savings and believe in Confucius. In our educational system, students always
have to take many unnecessary tests. We are rote-based curricula and exam-
centric. Even children who go to the very best public schools don’t have the
creative skills to compete in the world’s economy.

In addition, starting from kindergarten most parents want their children to

get into good public high schools. If the high school is better there are higher
chance of getting into a good university. Students are only asked to study
hard so we don’t have to help our parents with any house chores.
Furthermore, we can’t do anything we are interested in, so generally we don’t
have a happy and carefree childhood and schools therefore have crime and
many suicides.

However, in other countries especially in Western societies they

emphasize children’s mental and physical states as well as students’ self-
interests. In the U.S., children can attend many extracurricular activities such
as sports teams. In Germany, children don’t have any homework, too. They
should sleep at 8 every night, because parents believe that as children get
more sleep they can be healthier and thus more brilliant. It seems that
children in western countries can focus on their hobbies more and be happier.
Their parents and teachers will also help them to have more interest and
skills.

I think there are several ways the educational system can be improved in
my country. We can decrease the number of tests, because test scores is not
the only way to judge a student’s knowledge. We should do more activities
to use our imagination and be creative. We can have more outside classes and
we can learn more by doing it because it is the most important in shaping our
experiences.

Statistics show that if students can learn in other ways, they will have a
good future.

Word Count: 341

 Q25 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION

Talk about the educational system in your country and what you could
do to improve it. (Type 1 Question)

One of the pressing problems facing our nation’s educational system

today is the overall lack of competitiveness and motivation. There is little
doubt that immediate action is required to remedy the situation.

First of all, many Asian countries are deeply influenced by Confucian

values. We have a rote-based curriculum and are very exam-centric. This
has caused the phenomenon where even children who attend the very best
public schools lack the creative skills to compete in a new, challenging
information-driven economy. We should keep in mind that academic
performance is not the only way to judge a student’s level and knowledge.
Take for example the students in Finland, who consistently have the highest
global standardized test scores, and yet their school system does not revolve
around a test-based learning style. Research shows that there is no correlation
between the quantity of tests and success in the workforce.

A second beneficial change would be to focus on more extracurricular

activities such as sports teams, debate clubs and photography clubs. Western
societies emphasize children’s mental and physical states as well as students’
self-interests. If parents and teachers in my country also helped students to
cultivate their potential and skills, in the long run we’d have a more
versatile and dynamic workforce. We could do more activities to stimulate
our imaginations and spark our creativity. This could also include having
more outside classes to let us get in touch with Mother Nature.

A third overhaul to our education structure which would be

advantageous would be to encourage more volunteer work among the youth.
Encouraging a more hands-on approach within the community would not
only build up civic pride and neighborhood relations, it would also be a solid
educational tool for young citizens. Organizations such as Global Student
Outreach help build accommodations, schools, and educate on social issues
to poverty-stricken children in third world countries. Getting involved with
such groups could enhance our interpersonal skills too. Developing an
educational program that assists young people in heightening their
sociability and understanding of social cues would be an invaluable
investment.

The success of a nation is directly related to the well-being of the next

generation. Personal experience has taught me that students will benefit from
and excel in an environment which strives to make them all-rounders.

Word Count: 379

Q25 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. cultivate their potential

2. enhance our interpersonal skills
3. heightening their sociability
4. stimulate our imaginations
5. spark our creativity
6. “a hands-on approach”
7. “in the long run”
8. “remedy the situation”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. One of the pressing problems facing our nation’s educational system

today is the overall lack of competitiveness and motivation.
2. There is little doubt that immediate action is required to remedy the
situation.
3. This has caused the phenomenon where even children who attend the
very best public schools lack the creative skills to compete in a new,
challenging information-driven economy. We should keep in mind
that academic performance is not the only way to judge a student’s
level and knowledge.
4. Research shows that there is no correlation between the quantity of
tests and success in the workforce.
5. A second beneficial change would be to focus on more
extracurricular activities such as sports teams, debate clubs and
photography clubs.
6. This could also include having more outside classes to let us get in
touch with Mother Nature.
7. Encouraging a more hands-on approach within the community
would not only build up civic pride and neighborhood relations, it
would also be a solid educational tool for young citizens.
8. Getting involved with such groups could enhance our interpersonal
 skills too.
9. The success of a nation is directly related to the well-being of the
next generation.
10. Personal experience has taught me that students will benefit from
and excel in an environment which strives to make them all-
rounders.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. academic performance 10. invaluable

2. civic pride 11. Mother Nature
3. Confucian values 12. overhaul
4. cultivate their potential 13. poverty-stricken
5. debate 14. rote-based curriculum
6. dynamic 15. sociability
7. exam-centric 16. social cues
8. extracurricular activities 17. versatile
9. information-driven

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. Some students prefer to learn on their own. Others prefer to seek
advice from a teacher. Which do you prefer and why? (Type 2 Question)

Q2. Which source do you think is better for research papers, the internet
or academic books? Give reasons and examples to support your response.
(Type 2 Question)

Q3. It has been said, “Not everything that is learned is contained in

books.” Compare and contrast knowledge gained from experience with
knowledge gained from books. In your opinion, which source is more
important? Why? Include details and examples in your explanation. (Type 3
Question)
 Q26 STUDENT’S VERSION
Are video games more beneficial or harmful? (Type 2 Question)

I strongly believe that playing video games causes much more advantages
than setbacks.

First of all, video games allow people to learn things in both the new and
old ways. For example, there are lot of different types of video games
nowadays. knowing how to win the game also improve our thinking of logic
due to the processes. people figure out quickly that accomplishing the tasks
of the video game are powerful. In turn, they also feel winning is good.

In addition, perhaps most important, playing the video games can enrich
family life. Children like to play the video games with adults and other kids
and asking questions. Moreover, due to the process, people get closer to their
families. Furthermore, people can also meet new friends through playing
video games and learn the skill of teamwork.

However, playing video games has its setbacks too. Most parents know
the danger on the internet. There are lot of violent materials in some of the
video games that are inappropriate for children. Parents need to set some
limits for their children. However, if we can take perks of the video games
and benefits from them, this will play an important role in our life. People
can play the video games relate to fields as a spaceflight, architecture,
undersea exploration or historical events. It will help them to get knowledge.
What's more, people can also play some sports video games at home which
can help them feel relax and make them healthier.

In brief, although playing video games has some shortcomings, there are
more benefits than downsides. I believe that playing video games has made
my life more colorful. It is important in my life.

Word Count: 281

 Q26 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION
Are video games more beneficial or harmful? (Type 2 Question)

There is a general debate nowadays about whether video games are more
beneficial or harmful. Without a doubt, I strongly believe that playing video
games brings us more advantages than disadvantages.

First of all, video games not only help people master traditional ways of
learning, but also open up possibilities that simply are not available in
conventional education. Besides this, playing electronic games stimulates
our creativity. For instance, research shows that players are generally more
creative, as they’re immersed in stories and engaged in puzzle solving tasks.
Figuring out how to win these assorted games enhances our logic, as
quickly accomplishing the tasks within a video game is a stimulating
challenge. In turn, they also gain a sense of achievement by playing such
games and overcoming constant challenges.

In addition, and perhaps most importantly, playing these games can

enrich family life. Children like to play modern games with adults and other
kids, asking questions, making predictions, and comparing results together.
Moreover, during the process, people strengthen their family bond and also
get a sense of belonging with family members. Furthermore, people can also
expand their social circle through playing video games. Groups of players
achieve victory through coordinated teamwork and dedication learned from
gaming culture.

Most parents are under the illusion that cyberspace is dangerous. They are
keenly aware of the pornographic and violent content in some video games
that are inappropriate for children. However, this issue is easily remedied
via proper scrutiny and open communication with children regarding
potential hazards. There is no rose without a thorn. In video games, people
can immerse themselves in a vast array of themes, including games related
to spaceflight, architecture, undersea exploration or historical events. It helps
them to gain a sea of knowledge and realize their potential. What's more,
people can also play some active sports games at home such as Wii Fit which
can soothe their daily stress and boost their immune systems.
 In brief, playing video games offers many perks. I believe that playing
video games has made my life more colorful, and I simply cannot imagine
my life without them.

Word Count: 351

Q26 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. boost their immune systems

2. enhances our logic
3. enrich family life
4. expand their social circle
5. gain a sea of knowledge
6. gain a sense of achievement
7. get a sense of belonging
8. immerse themselves in a vast array of...
9. opens up possibilities
10. realize their potential
11. soothe their daily stress
12. stimulates our creativity
13. strengthen their family bond
14. “there is no rose without a thorn”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. There is a general debate nowadays about whether video games are

more beneficial or harmful.
2. Without a doubt, I strongly believe that playing video games bring us
more advantages than disadvantages.
3. For instance, research shows that players are generally more creative,
as they’re immersed in stories and engaged in puzzle solving tasks.
4. In turn, they also gain a sense of achievement by playing such
games.
5. Most parents are under the illusion that cyberspace is dangerous.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. assorted
2. conventional 8. modern
3. coordinated 9. perks
 4. dedication 10. pornographic
5. hazards 11. potential
6. inappropriate 12. remedied
7. keenly aware 13. scrutiny

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. How do you think the elderly could benefit from playing video
games? (Type 1 Question)

Q2. What is your favorite game and how has it influenced you? (Type 1
Question)

Q3. Other than traditional classroom settings, what are some other ways
to learn new things? (Type 1 Question)
 Q27 STUDENT’S VERSION
Some people prefer to work for themselves or own a business. Others
prefer to work for an employer. Would you rather be self-employed, work
for someone else, or own a business? Use specific reasons to explain your
choice. (Type 2 Question)

Without a doubt, I would like to own a business.

First of all, I like to challenge difficult things so in order to try something

interesting, I would like to own a business. Although utilizing an
entrepreneur will face many problems ranging from finance to laws to
techniques, I can learn a lot. It can help me to broaden my horizons. If I am
successful, I’ll feel proud. My life will be different from my same-aged
friends. Take my father for example. He does the landscape and he has his
own company now. He didn’t have too many capitals in the beginning. In
other words, he starts his entrepreneur by himself, he tried his best to solve
any kinds of problems so that he gets a high reputation between the clients.

In addition, when I have my business, I don’t have to be forced to go to

the office every day. I am more flexible. I can have more time to accompany
my family and meet more friends. If I can have more friends, it is also good
for my business. As I am a CEO, I have to realize to world trade so that I
have more opportunities to see the world and realize new information. It’s
very important for me.

However, we can’t always stay in the comfort zone. If we work for

others, it’s hard for us to make progress. We just go to work on time, and we
don’t be active and we don’t want to make our communication better. In that
way, we will lose our goal so that it can’t let us become creative. Our life will
be too stable but boring.

To sum up, having own business have to solve many difficulties but there
are still more benefits comparing to working for others. It makes my life
more colorful, and I can’t imagine my life without challenges.

Word Count: 314

 Q27 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION
Some people prefer to work for themselves or own a business. Others
prefer to work for an employer. Would you rather be self-employed, work
for someone else, or own a business? Use specific reasons to explain your
choice. (Type 2 Question)

When it comes to employment, some people prefer to be self-employed

or a business owner. Others argue that being an employee is better. Without a
doubt, I prefer working for myself so I would like to own a business.

First of all, I always welcome a good challenge, so in order to try

something interesting I would like to own a corporation. Although an
entrepreneur faces lots of adversity, including financial, legal, and technical
issues, they also acquire a wealth of information and knowledge. If I were
successful, I would also gain a sense of achievement. For example, my
father used to do landscape architecture and he started his entrepreneurial
venture from scratch. He overcame many obstacles including low start-up
capital and hiring issues. Despite initial hardships, he eventually came out
on top.

In addition, by having my own organization, I could nurture a sense of

responsibility by being a pillar of the community. Entrepreneurs create
jobs in the society which in turn establishes valuable connections in the
general population. Perhaps there’s no better example of innovative success
creating new jobs than Elon Musk and his multiple successful enterprises.
His achievements in numerous distinct technological ventures such as
PayPal, Tesla, and SpaceX have substantially boosted the economy. Besides
job creation, someone in this situation could expand their social circle, and
with more friends, could also help to further boost business. As a CEO, I
would have the means to donate to charities, assist in social programs, which
would be eye-opening experiences.

On the other hand, working for an employer provides stability and offers
lower risk. Despite this, we need to keep in mind that lacking responsibility
can lead to stagnation. We can’t always stay in our comfort zone. Take the
Apple Company, for example. The success of Apple was directly related to
the innovative spirit of its founders. Steve Jobs nourished his dreams and
realized his potential. Often times he went out on a limb and went above
and beyond, leading to technological revolution. The world is now a very
different place as a result of these visionaries. If great thinkers had remained
as employees simply punching a clock, the world would be far less colorful.

To sum up, gone are the days when we can rely on a steady paycheck.
The advantages of owning a business more than compensate for the
disadvantages. I can’t imagine my life without challenges.

Word Count: 401

(*We changed the essay’s grammar to 2nd conditional: “If...would/could”, which better
reflects the concept of a hypothetical situation.)
Q27 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. acquire a wealth of information and knowledge

2. being a pillar of the community
3. boosted the economy
4. boost business
5. establish valuable connections
6. be eye-opening experiences
7. expand their social circle
8. gain a sense of achievement
9. nourished his dreams
10. nurture a sense of responsibility
11. realized his potential
12. stay in our comfort zone
13. welcome a good challenge
14. “came out on top”
15. “keep in mind”
16. “punching a clock”
17. “started (something) from scratch”
18. “went above and beyond”
19. “went out on a limb”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. When it comes to employment, some people prefer to be self-

employed or a business owner. Others argue that being an employee
is better.
2. Without a doubt, I prefer working for myself so I would like to own a
business.
3. Although an entrepreneur faces lots of adversity, including
financial, legal, and technical issues, they also acquire a wealth of
information and knowledge.
4. He overcame many obstacles including low start-up capital and hiring
issues.
 5. Despite initial hardships, he eventually came out on top.
6. Perhaps there’s no better example of innovative success creating new
jobs than Elon Musk and his multiple successful enterprises.
7. On the other hand, working for an employer provides stability and
offers lower risk.
8. Despite this, we need to keep in mind that lacking responsibility can
lead to stagnation.
9. The success of Apple was directly related to the innovative spirit of
its founders.
10. To sum up, gone are the days when we can rely on a steady
paycheck.
11. The advantages of owning a business more than compensate for the
disadvantages.
12. I can’t imagine my life without challenges.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. adversity 7. landscape architecture

2. capital 8. stagnation
3. charities 9. technological revolution
4. enterprises 10. venture
5. entrepreneur 11. visionaries
6. initial hardships

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. Do you prefer a high paying job that comes with a lot of stress or a
lower paying job that leaves you with a lot of personal time? (Type 2
Question)

Q2. If you were an employer, would you prefer hiring someone who had
more experience and required a higher salary, or someone with little
experience whose salary would be less? (Type 2 Question)

Q3. Some people like to be team players. Others like to be team leaders.
Do you prefer to be a team player or a team leader? (Type 2 Question)
 Q28 STUDENT’S VERSION
Genetic intervention is the process of changing the genes of organisms
using biotechnology. Is genetic intervention more beneficial or harmful for
mankind? (Type 2 Question)

We are now living in a society where everything is advancing fast. We

need to accept the diversity of ideas and concepts. As a result, although the
technology of genetic intervention brings about some disputes in our life, it is
not always the case because something changes entirely not adjust itself by
some progress.

There are some benefits for the gene techniques which will be soar in the
future. First of all, the professional skill of our medical advancements which
are all the rage recently. People who have lost a body organ such as a kidney
due to the scientists can copy that part of organs for the individual, which, in
the long run, would develop better than a transplant surgeon. Besides,
because the 3D printer techniques and the tools of surgeon become more
accurate and precise. People can enhance the possibilities of conquering
serious diseases. For example, the severe patients need to transplant some
organs; however there is no donor can rescue immediately so that the patient
miss the chance to recovery or even survive. Therefore, if the cloning skill
becomes more popular so that can solve the problems and increase the
population of endangered diseases.

In addition, the gene skill is not only used in the medical advancements
but also can be exploited in the agricultural genetic engineering. Nowadays
people become more and more care about the health so that the technology of
the gene's food can boost our immune system, enhance our stamina and
decrease the rate of getting diseases. Moreover, the genetically modified food
can also solve the problem of food shortage in some areas. What's more,
many natural resources are disappearing on our planet due to the developing
of the population. Studies show that until such time as mankind has the sense
to lower its population to the point where the planet can provide a
comfortable support for all, people will have to accept more artificial food.

Besides, the cloning skills still bring some critics such as the moral issue
of provides a copy child and benefit couples who are infertile and want a kid
of their own. However, although the technics perhaps cause the psychological
harm for copied human children loss of identity, a sense of uniqueness and
individuality, living in a multiple societies maybe people will find some
methods to cope with the thinking in the future.

To sum up, although there are some drawbacks of cloning, the advantages
of the genetic intervention technology still outweigh the shortcomings.
Furthermore, it can make our life more colorful and progressive.

Word Count: 425

 Q28 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION
Genetic intervention is the process of changing the genes of organisms
using biotechnology. Is genetic intervention more beneficial or harmful for
mankind? (Type 2 Question)

When it comes to genetic intervention, some people think that it brings

numerous benefits. Others argue that the opposite is true. Personally, I
believe that the advantages of this technology more than compensate for the
disadvantages.

Genetic intervention offers many perks, the first and foremost of which is
medical breakthroughs with regard to chronic ailments. Serious illnesses
such as diabetes, Parkinson's disease, and Alzheimer’s are like the plague
of modern times. With genetic alterations, people could enhance the
possibility of conquering these diseases. For example, doctors could get
involved in the conception stage of a pregnancy to ensure that a child does
not have defective genes or the markers of many hereditary conditions.
Therefore, if this technology becomes more prolific, they can effectively nip
the problem in the bud, increasing everyone’s overall quality of life.

Another positive aspect to this technology is that it could help those

suffering from traumatic injuries. Patients in wheelchairs may be able to
walk again via the amazing progress in gene research. People who have lost a
body organ such as a kidney could get that organ cloned by doctors and
scientists. In addition, 3D printing techniques and surgical tools have become
more accurate and precise. Many people involved in accidents could survive
if they had access to genetically copied organs. Professional athletes could
also extend their careers which may otherwise be cut short by sports
mishaps. Cloning their own cells could reduce recovery time and allow them
to have fulfilling careers.

However, the controversial issue of genetic intervention still stirs up

some negative critics. Opponents of this technology argue that it’s
unethical, unnatural, or it goes against religion. With such arguments, we
need to weigh the pros and cons and not get caught up in emotional knee-
jerk reactions. Despite all the conjecture, genetic assistance is absolutely
necessary to help infertile couples have children. Experts claim that there
are around 12 million infertile Americans. Many try in vitro fertilization to
conceive a child only to end up with a miscarriage and depression, not to
mention the financial burden. Gene technology would eliminate a lot of
suffering known to exist with current fertility methods, and could provide a
safer way to create families.

To sum up, the ample evidence presented enables us to reasonably

conclude that genetic intervention will become part and parcel of our lives.
As well as making our lives more progressive, it could also cut down on the
amount of unnecessary suffering worldwide.

Word Count: 410

Q28 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. are the plague of modern times

2. conquering these diseases
3. cut short by…
4. enhance the possibility
5. eliminate a lot of suffering
6. extend their careers
7. goes against…
8. weigh the pros and cons
9. “knee-jerk reactions”
10. “nip (something) in the bud”
11. “part and parcel of”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. When it comes to genetic intervention, some people think that it

brings numerous benefits. Others argue that the opposite is true.
2. Personally, I believe that the advantages of this technology more than
compensate for the disadvantages.
3. Genetic intervention offers many perks, the first and foremost of
which is medical breakthroughs with regard to chronic ailments.
4. Another positive aspect to this technology is that it could help those
suffering from traumatic injuries.
5. However, the controversial issue of genetic intervention still stirs up
some negative critics.
6. Opponents of this technology argue that it’s unethical, unnatural, or
it goes against religion.
7. With such arguments, we need to weigh the pros and cons and not
get caught up in emotional knee-jerk reactions.
8. Despite all the conjecture, genetic assistance is absolutely necessary
to help infertile couples have children.
9. Experts claim that there are around 12 million infertile Americans.
 10. To sum up, the ample evidence presented enables us to
reasonably conclude that genetic intervention will become part
and parcel of our lives.
11. As well as making our lives more progressive, it could also cut
down on the amount of unnecessary suffering worldwide.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. Alzheimer’s 14. in vitro fertilization

2. chronic ailments 15. miscarriage
3. conceive 16. mishaps
4. conception stage 17. negative critics
5. controversial 18. Parkinson's disease
6. defective genes 19. plague
7. depression 20. progressive
8. diabetes 21. prolific
9. ensure 22. traumatic injuries
10. fertility 23. precise
11. fulfilling 24. unethical
12. hereditary conditions 25. unnatural
13. infertile

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. What technological advancements will the next century bring? (Type
1 Question)

Q2. What is the most controversial issue in your country right now? (A
controversial issue is a topic which causes a lot of heated debate and usually
has very divided opinions. Controversial issues include abortion, the death
penalty, etc.) (Type 1 Question)

Q3. What are some things humans have sacrificed for the sake of
progress (Type 1 Question)
 Q29 STUDENT’S VERSION
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?

Life today is easier and more comfortable than it was when your
grandparents were children. (Type 4 Question)

With the advance of the modern technology, we can have greats deal of
enjoyments and live a better quality of life today. However, life today is
definitely more comfortable but not easier than it was. Here is why.

First of all, modern transportation such as cars, metro systems and air
planes are available, affordable and bring a great convenience to the people.
We save a lot of time, and we can spend much time on developing our
interests. In addition, we have a better quality of life. We live in built- in air-
conditioner, strong cement, vibration-proof and noise reducing house. We
can take a stroll in the nearby parks and have extra money to adopt pets.
That's the only privileged enjoyment in the past.

Second, with the invention of the internet, we can enjoy many services.
We better education environment. The higher diploma can be more easily
access for the poor and disabled. There are fewer and fewer illiterates. We
can gain width and in-depth of knowledge with a single click in any place. In
addition, we can use online shopping and communicate with our friends all
over the world. People in the past cannot imagine life can be so full of
varieties.

However, life is not easier and simpler than it was in the past. We work
until midnight, and the heavy workload lead our health deteriorate. What's
more, we have to control the time efficiency, compete with the people and
businesses in other countries. Furthermore, we are face the serious
environment damage issues such as the depletion of natural resources and
pollutions.

In sum, although we have more conveniences and enjoyments today, we

have pay for it. We work for longer time, losing our heath and face the great
competition with the strong countries. We should pay more attention to all
the negatives while enjoying the benefits.

Word Count: 309

 Q29 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?

Life today is easier and more comfortable than it was when your
grandparents were children. (Type 4 Question)

The advancement of modern technology has transformed our lives for the
better. There is little doubt that life today is more comfortable now than it
was when my grandparents were children.

First of all, technological advancement has resulted in a complete

overhaul of society. Modern transportation such as cars, metro systems and
airplanes are widely available, affordable and bring a great convenience to
the masses. With so much time saved on commuting, there is more time for
our passions and interests so we can truly realize our potential. In addition,
modern quality of life is much better than in the past due to such
advancements like air-conditioners, refrigerators, and dishwashers. It should
come as no surprise that these appliances free up more time for leisure
activities such as hiking, painting, and visiting museums.

Second, with the invention of the internet, we can now enjoy a vast
multitude of services with a single click. This includes a better educational
environment with access to knowledge in an unprecedented way. We can
acquire a sea of information as we link into a massive network of in-depth
knowledge with a single click. There is a worldwide awareness that education
is a basic right, and illiteracy rates are lower than at any time in the past.
Moreover, online shopping and social networking sites can soothe our daily
stress and expand our social circle, respectively. People in the past were not
exposed to such a rich array of entertainment, convenience and
information, which have made our lives immensely more comfortable.

Although some may argue that our grandparents had a carefree childhood
in a cleaner environment with less pollution, it is widely acknowledged that
medical breakthroughs like the invention of antibiotics and better surgical
techniques have had far-reaching impact. Not only are previously fatal
afflictions now easily remedied with a pill, but we also are more aware of
preventative measures to safeguard our health. Examples of this include
bacterial pneumonia, syphilis, and rabies. On top of this, modern times
gives us access to CAT scans, X-rays, chemotherapy and treatments for
other chronic ailments.

In sum, we live in a convenient and resourceful era. Reaping the benefits

of technological advancements has made our lives more colorful. Not only
have they transformed our lives but also have given us a sense of security.

Word Count: 384

(The ideas in the student’s essay weren’t organized according to a Type 4 Question format, so
we changed the response to be more coherent and focussed.)
Q29 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. acquire a sea of information

2. given us a sense of security
3. enjoy a vast multitude of...
4. expand our social circle
5. exposed to such a rich array of…
6. had far-reaching impact
7. realize our potential
8. safeguard our health
9. soothe our daily stress
10. “reaping the benefits of…”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. There is little doubt that life today is more comfortable now than it
was when my grandparents were children.
2. It should come as no surprise that these appliances free up more time
for leisure activities such as hiking, painting, and visiting museums.
3. There is a worldwide awareness that education is a basic right, and
illiteracy rates are lower than at any time in the past.
4. Although some may argue that our grandparents had a carefree
childhood in a cleaner environment with less pollution, it is widely
acknowledged that medical breakthroughs like the invention of
antibiotics and better surgical techniques have had far-reaching
impact.
5. Not only are previously fatal afflictions now easily remedied with a
pill, but we also are more aware of preventative measures to
safeguard our health.
6. Examples of this include bacterial pneumonia, syphilis, and rabies.
On top of this, modern times gives us access to CAT scans, X-rays,
chemotherapy and treatments for other chronic ailments.
 FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. antibiotics 11. link into

2. appliances 12. medical breakthroughs
3. bacterial pneumonia 13. multitude
4. CAT scans 14. network
5. chemotherapy 15. preventative measures
6. chronic ailments 16. rabies
7. commuting 17. remedied
8. fatal afflictions 18. syphilis
9. illiteracy rates 19. unprecedented
10. immensely 20. widely available

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. “It was easier to be successful in the past than it is today.” Do you
agree or disagree with this statement? State your reasons. (Type 4 Question)

Q2. If you could go back to sometime in the past, when would it be and
why? (Type 1 Question)

Q3. A generation gap involves the differences in thoughts, behaviors, and

attitudes between different age groups. What are some of the biggest
“generation gaps” between you and your parents? (Type 1 Question)
 Q30 STUDENT’S VERSION
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Advertising
can tell you a lot about a country. Use specific reasons and examples to
support your answer. (Type 4 Question)

Without a doubt, I totally agree that we can know a lot about a country
from advertising.

First of all, advertising can reflect a country’s cultures because many

advertisements include a wide variety of materials ranging from folklore
songs to historic architectures to local costumes. It’s all a symbol of a
country. Because of these materials, it can make advertisements more
colorful. Besides, as there are many kinds of symbolic things in the
advertisements, it can help us to immerse in the local culture and we will
even realize our culture thoroughly by see the advertising.

In addition, we can realize the freedom of a country by means of

advertising because if we are in a conservative country, the freedom of
speech is controlled by their government so they can’t make the interesting or
controversial advertisements. In this way, their advertisements seem boring
and it can’t attract our interests to buy anything or to realize any new policies.
Take me for example. I took a trip to another country last year so I had an
opportunity to watch their TV programs. Much to my surprise, the
advertisements were lack of creativity and I was confused that how to sell
products because the advertisements could not attract my attractions.

What’s more, we can know the characters about a country from the
advertising. If we are in enthusiastic countries such as Brazil, Spain, and
Italy, their advertisements will be livelier. On the other hand, if we are in a
serious country, their advertisements will be more formal.

In sum, the advertisements bring us different information. It also reflect

the differences between different countries, so we can observe other countries
by advertising.

Word Count: 279

 Q30 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Advertising can
tell you a lot about a country. Use specific reasons and examples to support
your answer. (Type 4 Question)

When it comes to commercial activity, some people think that it

accurately portrays the complete culture of a nation. Others argue that the
opposite is true. Unquestionably, advertising speaks volumes about every
individual country.

First of all, it’s plain to see that advertising reflects a country’s culture.
Many advertisements include a wide variety of local artistic flavorings,
ranging from folk songs to historic architecture to traditional attire. These
are all important foundations of culture, and are also distinct symbols of a
country. If we travel and immerse ourselves in the local culture, the
symbols and characteristics of our host country offer a window into their
unique worldview. Comparisons with our own mass media and advertising
make us aware of subtle or obvious cultural differences.

In addition, we can get informed about the lifestyles of citizens in a

particular country via advertisements. The success of America’s fast-food
industry is directly related to the millions of dollars spent on its advertising
per year. Also, American consumers flock to buy sports gear endorsed by
their favorite NBA or MLB players. There’s little doubt that for the majority
of Americans, cheering for their favorite teams on the screen while indulging
in appetizing pizzas and hotdogs is the norm. Further to this, there are many
commercials pitching pharmaceutical products such as pills and other
health supplements. This is evidence that Americans hold healthcare in high
regard and put a strong emphasis on this industry.

However, some people argue that since we live in a global village,

commercials no longer reflect the unique heritage of a country.
Nevertheless, in spite of globalization, multinationals such as the
McDonald’s franchise show glimpses and hints of local traditions and
customs in their own advertising. As an illustration of this, I was amused to
see the menu changes at a McDonald’s chain in South Korea, where they had
added local cuisine such as kimchi to their standard meal range. The local
modifications very clearly underscored the unique nature of their
advertising. What’s more, we can see general regional traits in a country’s
promotional materials, such as unique sayings, expressions and celebrities.
Besides language, text, and style differences, commercials in Brazil would
definitely have a different flavor than those in Germany, for example.

In sum, while globalization has resulted in some overlap, we still find

regional differences between different countries. Ultimately, from something
as simple as commercials, we can acquire a wealth of cultural information.

Word Count: 404

Q30 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. acquire a wealth cultural information

2. are all important foundations of culture
3. immerse ourselves in the local culture
4. indulging in….
5. ...is the norm
6. put a strong emphasis on...
7. “hold something in high regard”
8. “offer a window into...”
9. “speaks volumes about...”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. When it comes to commercial activity, some people think that it

accurately portrays the complete culture of a nation. Others argue
that the opposite is true.
2. Unquestionably, advertising speaks volumes about every individual
country.
3. Many advertisements include a wide variety of local artistic
flavorings, ranging from folk songs to historic architecture to
traditional attire.
4. The success of its fast-food industry is directly related to the millions
of dollars spent on its advertising per year.
5. There’s little doubt that for the majority of Americans, cheering for
their favorite teams on the screen while indulging in appetizing
pizzas and hotdogs is the norm.
6. Further to this, there are many commercials pitching
pharmaceutical products such as pills and other health supplements.
7. This is evidence that Americans hold healthcare in high regard and
put a strong emphasis on this industry.
8. Nevertheless, in spite of globalization, multinationals such as the
McDonald’s franchise show glimpses and hints of local traditions
and customs in their own advertising.
 9. As an illustration of this, I was amused to see the menu changes at a
McDonald’s chain in South Korea, where they had added local
cuisine such as kimchi to their standard meal range.
10. The local modifications very clearly underscored the unique nature
of their advertising.
11. Besides language, text and style differences, commercials in
Thailand would definitely have a different flavor than those in
Germany, for example.
12. In sum, while globalization has resulted in some overlap, we still
find regional differences between different countries.
13. Ultimately, from something as simple as commercials, we can
acquire a wealth of cultural information.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. architecture
13. modifications
2. attire
14. multinationals
3. chain
15. overlap
4. cuisine
16. pharmaceutical
5. distinct
17. pitching
6. endorsed
18. regional
7. flock
19. subtle
8. franchise
20. traits
9. foundations of culture
21. underscored
10. glimpses
22. unique
11. global village
23. worldview
12. heritage

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. Certain advertisements are banned in some countries. Do you agree

or disagree with this statement? Please state the reasons for your explanation.
(Type 4 Question)

Q2. Do advertisements make our lives more colorful or do they drive us

into unnecessary consumerism? (Type 2 Question)
 Q3. Describe the most memorable advertisement you’ve ever seen. How
has it affected your life? (Type 1 Question)
 Q31 STUDENT’S VERSION
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Only people
who earn a lot of money are successful. Use specific reasons and
examples to support your answer. (Type 4 Question)

Without a doubt, I don’t agree we criticize people’s success only by his

fortune because it’s too superficial.

First of all, we always make a mistake. As seeing people who drives

famous brand cars such as BMW or PORCHE or wear expensive clothes like
Channel or Prada, we will think about he is a successful person. There is an
old saying “ Don’t judge a person by his appearance.” Appearance is just a
part we can criticize a person, but the most important thing is his true heart
and it can influence his characteristics. On meeting a person who is very
polite or generous, we all appreciate him a successful person.

In addition, we can’t deny there are many resolutions to be successful so

earning a lot of money isn’t a only way. We have to say if one person gets a
sense of achievement on his professional field, we still admire his dedication.
Take Edison for example. He is the inventor of light bulb. Because of
Edison’s effort, we can enjoy the convenience of light. It’s a crucial invention
for human beings. We don’t have to use fire or fireflies to light up so we can
do more things like studying, driving cars at night. More importantly, ships
can navigate on the sea by lighthouse to distinguish their directions. It’s also
making a progress on shipping.

What’s more, money is not the key point to judge a person. If people is
rich, it doesn’t represent he is a moral one. Some people like to do volunteers
or funding non-government organizations or donating money so that we all
think whether he is rich or not, he is a successful person. Take Ho,Su-Jufor
example. She sells vegetables in the traditional market and she is not rich.
Her three children all passed away from serious disease. She saves money
every day. Finally, she donates her all savings to the elementary school in
Taitung for constructing a library. She was even elected by CNN the most
influenced person in the world in 2014. We all appreciate her a successful.
 In brief, we can know earning a lot of money just represents he knows
how to make money; however there are many ways to evaluate people’s
success. We can’t do a superficial person.

Word Count: 379

 Q31 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Only people
who earn a lot of money are successful. Use specific reasons and
examples to support your answer. (Type 4 Question)

There is a general debate nowadays about the definition of success.

Without a doubt, we shouldn’t judge a person’s success only by his wealth
because it’s too superficial.

First and foremost, there are many definitions of “success”. One type of
success is achievement within the community: some people volunteer, fund
non-government organizations, or donate money. Take Ho Su-Ju for
example. She sold vegetables in a traditional market and she was not rich. In
fact, she experienced severe hardships, like when her three children all
passed away from serious diseases. She saved every day, and eventually
donated all of her savings to an elementary school in the countryside to
construct a library. She was even nominated by CNN as one of the most
influential people in the world in 2014. We admire her community spirit and
she is well-respected by thousands.

In addition, other types of “success” involve establishing a strong family

unit. Some people take for granted the amount of struggle and hard work
that it takes to make the various members of a family exist in harmony. For
instance, my family was quite traditional, with my father working in an office
while my mother stayed at home as a housewife. However, these roles
complemented each other, so things were always functioning at home. We
always had enough food, proper education, and even the occasional family
trip. While at the time I just assumed it was natural, in retrospect, there was
a tremendous amount of work that went into keeping the family operating as
a fine-tuned machine.

Those who say that finances are the only marker of success are not
entirely incorrect. Without cash to cover basic necessities and even some
luxuries, life would indeed be grueling. However, using money as the only
yardstick for success is too simplistic. I recently read a newspaper article on
the depression, insecurity, and loneliness that the ultra-rich experience. Many
are unsatisfied with their lives and their stories have aroused public
discussion. Affluent people who become prosperous often have to sacrifice
personal and family time. So while they may have achieved economic gains,
there is still an unbalance from their lack of mental or spiritual success.

In brief, most people are under the illusion that money equates success.
There is no such guarantee if the individual’s well-being is being
jeopardized. People should not be making money at the expense of their
health or family.

Word Count: 401

Q31 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS

1. exist in harmony
2. operating as a fine-tuned machine
3. “take for granted”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCE STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. There is a general debate nowadays about the definition of success.

2. Those who say that finances are the only marker of success are not
entirely incorrect, as money is definitely an important aspect to
living.
3. Without cash to cover basic necessities and even some luxuries, life
would indeed be grueling.
4. Many are unsatisfied with their lives and their stories have aroused
public discussion.
5. So while they may have achieved economic gains, there is still an
unbalance from their lack of mental or spiritual success.
6. In brief, most people are under the illusion that money equates
success. There is no such guarantee if the individual’s well-being is
being jeopardized. People should not be making money at the
expense of their health or family.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. affluent
8. nominated
2. construct
9. prosperous
3. grueling
10. sacrifice
4. influential
11. superficial
5. in retrospect
12. well-respected
6. jeopardized
13. yardstick
7. necessities
 The contents in this essay could also be applied to questions such as :

Q1. How important is money in your life? Please provide specific details
to support your explanation. (Type 1 Question)

Q2. Some people define success by having great relationships with

others. Others view success as having wealth and status. Which view do you
think is correct and why? (Type 2 Question)

Q3. There is a saying “Money can’t buy you love”. Do you agree or
disagree with this statement? (Type 4 Question)
 Q32 STUDENT’S VERSION
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is better to
be a member of a group than to be the leader of a group. Use specific
reasons and examples to support your answer. (Type 4 Question)

Without a doubt, I don’t agree with the statement because I think we can
play different roles in different situations. In other words, we can always face
our adversities in our life.

First of all, if we are a professional person in the specific field ranging

from law to science to medicine, we have to be the leader of a group. Because
of our outstanding performance in the field, we can know the disputes of the
issue; therefore, we can take our group to solve the problems. Take Lee
Yuan-Jun, the leader of Central Research Center in my country for example.
He is a chemical doctor and he graduated from Harvard University. He got
the Nobel Prize in the chemical field so he has a high reputation. In order to
promote our technology and scientific skills in the country, he was invited to
be the leader in the research center. it’s the highest researching organization.
Because of his donations, we can have a progressive technology.

In addition, being a leader can help us to learn many new knowledge. We

will be more diligent, or we will keep pace with others. Only if we are a
leader, we are willing to face difficult issues in our business. While
achieving success is easier said than done, persistence does in fact pay off.
One of the most important traits of a successful person is self-confidence,
another is desire, and still another is determination. Therefore, if we want to
be a successful, we have to accept any difficulties in life.

What’s more, it’s needless to say that be a leader has to put up with many
peer pressure or financial pressure. We can’t diagnose it; however, we have
to be less comfortable to creative more miracles in our life. We can feel
proudness in the process. Take me for example. I am a surgeon doctor. I am
not familiar with law at all. In order to know how to apply law to the
medicine, I go to law school to study law. Finally, I even got the lawyer
license.
 In essence, we can’t ignore personal potential. As we are a specialist in
one field, we should vote for the group of the leader to make our life more
colorful.

Word Count: 375

 Q32 FULL-SCORING REVISED VERSION
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? “It is better
to be a member of a group than to be the leader of a group.” Use specific
reasons and examples to support your answer. (Type 4 Question)

Without a doubt, I disagree with the statement that it is better to be a

follower than a leader. Life is unpredictable and sometimes we have to take
the lead and help others overcome adversity.

First of all, being a leader can help us to broaden our horizons and
acquire a wealth of knowledge. With more responsibilities we will be more
diligent and have to be on par with others. Only when we are leaders will
we be willing to go above and beyond to expand our abilities. While
achieving success is easier said than done, persistence does in fact pay off.
For example, Lee Yuan-Jun, a Nobel Prize winning chemistry professor
from Harvard, devotes his time to promoting our region’s technology.
Because of his leadership and time investments, our technology has
undoubtedly progressed.

In addition, a leader can nurture a sense of responsibility by being a

pillar of the community. Lead figures establish valuable connections in the
general population, socializing with other forward-thinkers. Perhaps there’s
no better example of progressive leadership than Elon Musk. He’s continued
to use his influential position to improve himself, his brand and his vision,
creating technological ventures such as PayPal, Tesla, and SpaceX, which
have substantially boosted the economy. In this role as a leader, he has the
means to donate to charities, assist in social programs, and be a part of other
eye-opening experiences. As a company leader, the opportunities are
limitless. What’s more, one of the most important traits of a successful
person is his ability to overcome adversity. These qualities can’t be
nurtured if one remains as a basic employee. Mr. Musk’s achievements in
the automotive industry were a constant uphill struggle as he attempted to
revolutionize a very powerful and traditional part of the market. While some
may suggest that a leader has to put up with lots of social or financial
pressure, the reality is that we have to leave our comfort zone in order to
evolve and find overall fulfillment. A smooth sea never made a skilled
mariner, which definitely applies to skill acquisition for leaders. Through
the process of trials and tribulations, we can get a sense of achievement.

In essence, leadership is absolutely necessary to push boundaries and

progress forward. Most people are under the illusion that stability brings
security, but there is no such guarantee without constant innovation and
drive. The necessity for strong leadership in such a volatile environment
seems clear.

Word Count: 407

Q32 CONTENT ANALYSIS
FULL-SCORING PHRASES AND IDIOMS:

1. acquire a wealth of knowledge

2. being a pillar of the community
3. be on par with others
4. boosted the economy
5. broaden our horizons
6. establish valuable connections
7. get a sense of achievement
8. nurture a sense of responsibility
9. overcome adversity
10. take the lead
11. “a smooth sea never made a skilled mariner”
12. “easier said than done”
13. “eye-opening”
14. “go above and beyond”
15. “leave our comfort zone”
16. “pay off”
17. “push boundaries”
18. “ trials and tribulations”
19. “uphill struggle”

FULL-SCORING SENTENCES STRUCTURES AND IDEAS:

1. Only when we are leaders will we be willing to go above and beyond

to expand our abilities.
2. While achieving success is easier said than done, persistence does in
fact pay off.
3. Perhaps there’s no better example of progressive leadership than Elon
Musk.
4. What’s more, one of the most important traits of a successful person
is his ability to overcome adversity.
5. While some may suggest that a leader has to put up with lots of social
or financial pressure, the reality is that we have to leave our comfort
 zone in order to evolve and find overall fulfillment.
6. In essence, leadership is absolutely necessary to push boundaries and
progress forward.
7. Most people are under the illusion that stability brings security, but
there is no such guarantee without constant innovation and drive.
8. The necessity for strong leadership in such a volatile environment
seems clear.

FULL-SCORING VOCABULARY:

1. automotive industry
5. nurtured
2. charities
6. revolutionize
3. chemistry
7. volatile
4. diligent

The contents of this essay could also be applied for questions such as:

Q1. What are the qualities of a great leader? Please provide specific
examples and details. (Type 1 Question)

Q2. A team player is replaceable while a leader is not. Do you agree or

disagree with this statement? (Type 4 Question)

Q3. Some people think that being a strong leader is something a person is
born with. Others argue that leadership can be learned. Which view do you
think is correct and why? (Type 2 Question)
 Q33 FULL-SCORING VERSION
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People are
never satisfied with what they have; they always want something more or
something different. Use specific reasons to support your answer. (Type
4 Question)

Without a doubt, humanity has shown throughout history that we’re never
satisfied with what we have; however, this has been an overall positive
driving force for progress.

One of the most important traits of a successful person is his ability to

constantly innovate, which would never happen if one were satisfied all the
time. “Necessity is the mother of invention,” and we find the need for new
things through dissatisfaction. Take, for instance, Elon Musk and his
achievements in the automotive industry, which were a constant uphill
struggle as he attempted to revolutionize a very powerful and traditional part
of the market. A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner, which definitely
applies to how we progress as a species. Through the process of trials and
tribulations when we overcome adversity, we can get a sense of
achievement.

Second, the invention of the internet was a response to seeking better

forms of communication and data transfer. If we had been satisfied with
technologies at the time, we wouldn’t be able to enjoy a vast multitude of
services that we have now. This includes a better educational environment
with access to knowledge in an unprecedented way. We can acquire a sea
of information as we link into a massive repository of in-depth knowledge
with a mouse click. Illiteracy rates are lower than at any time in the past.
Moreover, online shopping and social networking sites can soothe our daily
stress and expand our social circle, respectively. This rich array of
entertainment, convenience and information has made our lives immensely
more colorful.

Although some may argue that happiness comes from contentment with
one’s current situation, this is not how the world functions. Being aware of
discontent leads to desire for change, which fuels modernization. It is widely
acknowledged that medical breakthroughs like the invention of antibiotics
and better surgical techniques have had far-reaching impact. Not only are
previously fatal afflictions now easily remedied with a pill, but we also are
more aware of preventative measures to safeguard our health. Examples
of this include bacterial pneumonia, syphilis, and rabies. On top of this,
modern times gives us access to CAT scans, X-rays, chemotherapy and
treatments for other chronic ailments. The fact that people are never satisfied
with a current situation has been a positive incentive for evolution.

To sum up, it’s evident that humans are constantly improving skills and
embracing new ideas. In order to live in a progressive society, the necessity
for wanting more or seeking something different seems clear.

Word Count: 418

 Q34 FULL-SCORING VERSION
Q: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People
should read only materials that are about real events, real people and
established facts. Use specific reasons and details to support your opinion.
(Type 4 Question)

When it comes to selecting reading materials, some people think that it’s
better to read fiction. Others argue that the opposite is true. Personal
experience has taught me that reading fiction is an absolute necessity and
colors one’s life in positive ways.

Reading fiction offers many advantages, the first and foremost of which
is learning valuable life skills and realizing one’s potential and interests.
For instance, when I read stories like Harry Potter, I not only engage my
ingenuity, but I also learn about challenges, responsibility, and overcoming
adversity. This type of text helps readers not only to stimulate their
imagination but also to expand their perceptions of reality. There are
multiple ways to learn important life lessons through reading novels, which
include themes such as loyalty, friendships, betrayal or persistence.

Furthermore, reading fiction is mentally healthy. One of the best ways to

calm a frantic mind is to shift one’s focus. Some tales are engaging and
challenging, so they require tons of mental energy and keep people on their
toes. Such focus helps people forget their stress inducers. Consequently,
they immerse themselves in the narratives and escape from the stresses of
daily life. Incorporating mental exercise into one’s lifestyle and daily
routine results in an overall healthier existence and sense of well-being.

This is a fast-paced society so we can constantly find out about events on

TV, newspapers, or online. If we only read about real-world events and non-
fiction, our lives would be quite dull and one-sided. It’s important to see the
value in focussing on artistic endeavors and getting in touch with our
creative side as well. If reading is solely focussed on real events and real
people, innovation and creativity are often lacking, making youth less
competitive in the global economy. The most innovative and widely-used
technology such as Amazon, Apple, or Tesla were developed in
environments which highly value creative thought.

To sum up, I disagree that time is better spent reading only non-fiction.
We need to stir our creativity as much as our academic interests. The
necessity for a vast and varied reading library seems clear.

Word Count: 351

 Q35 FULL-SCORING VERSION
A university plans to develop a new research center in your country.
Some people want a center for business research. Other people want a
center in agriculture. Which of these two kinds of research centers do you
recommend for your country? Use specific reasons in your
recommendation. (Type 2 Question)

The term “business” refers to a wide range of areas, including medical, e-

commerce and technology, as well as agriculture. While both agriculture and
business are cornerstones of a stable society, I would recommend
establishing a new research center that focuses on business.

A country with a strong business framework gives back to the world in

multiple ways, the first and foremost of which is medical breakthroughs.
Serious illnesses such as diabetes, Parkinson's disease, and Alzheimer’s are
like the plagues of modern times. With businesses funding research in
these areas, people could enhance the possibility of conquering these
ailments. Furthermore, it is widely acknowledged that the invention of
antibiotics and better surgical techniques have had far-reaching impact.
Not only are previously fatal afflictions now easily remedied with a pill, but
we also are more aware of preventative measures to safeguard our health.
Investment in business is an investment in the overall quality of life of the
population.

Second, a business research center keeps a country in the loop in terms of

modern e-commerce. With the pervasiveness of e-commerce, we can now
enjoy a vast multitude of services such as international banking and
shopping. Nurturing trade through a business research center would allow a
nation to progress and remain aware of contemporary financial trends.
Examples include how bankers are using Artificial Intelligence to trade
stocks, or how cash is gradually being replaced by Apple Pay. What’s more,
we now have unprecedented access to resources and knowledge which
keeps our society competitive.

Although some may argue that agriculture is necessary to avoid food

shortages and even famine, the fact of the matter is that an established
business network is crucial to make any horticulture advancements practical
anyway. In order to remain viable and relevant in today’s world, people
should devote resources and energy to staying on the cutting edge of
current business trends and technology. Sustainable business models like
solar energy projects affect people from all walks of life, from power
generation to homes to generating electricity for farming projects. A strong
focus on technology has resulted in a complete overhaul of society.

In sum, we now live in a convenient and resourceful era because of

medical advancements, e-commerce, and technology. Reaping the benefits of
a sturdy business foundation would be a better investment for our future. Not
only would it affect many aspects of our lives but it would also give us a
competitive edge.

Word Count: 403

 Q36 FULL-SCORING VERSION
Some young children spend a great amount of their time practicing
sports. Compare and contrast the advantages and disadvantages of this and
give your opinion. Use specific reasons and examples to support your
answer. (Type 3 Question)

When it comes to children playing sports, like anything, it has both

benefits and drawbacks. However, personal experience has taught me that a
childhood involved with sports contributes to a happy and healthy individual.

First of all, if children spend a lot of their time playing, they don’t have to
put up with academic pressure too early, and they can learn valuable life
skills and realize their potential. For instance, when children play sports
such as baseball and hockey, they can make friends, learn responsibility, and
overcome adversity. The skill of using teamwork is important in our fast-
paced society, and playing with others can expand their social circle. These
skillsets become their valuable in the future. It helps children not only to
stimulate their imagination but also to develop a variety of valuable life
skills. One further benefit is that children spending lots of time on sports can
get in touch with Mother Nature, which is another way to relax.

Nevertheless, there are merits to focussing on academic achievement

rather than sports. As children go to school, they accept a regular routine.
Furthermore, many believe that this exam-centric system makes a person
more employable in the future. In Asia, for example, parents believe this
type of academic approach gives children a competitive edge and discipline.
Also, being involved in sports often results in injuries or too much
competitiveness. As with anything, balance is important. From this
viewpoint, sports could be a hobby, but definitely should not take up the
lion’s share of one’s time.

Of paramount importance, however, is that exercising is both physically

and mentally healthy. We should keep in mind that being active can greatly
boost our immune system, enhance our stamina, and help to lower our
cholesterol. Some exercises such as basketball, tennis, and soccer are
intensive and exhausting, so they consume tons of energy and keep
students physically fit. Such intensity helps children forget their stress
inducers. Furthermore, one of the pressing problems facing many nations
today is obesity. Incorporating exercise into one’s lifestyle and daily routine
results in an overall healthier existence and sense of well-being. Moreover,
statistical evidence lends support to the view that students who exercise
perform better academically.

In brief, although there are some shortcomings of spending time doing

sports, the advantages of being physically active still outweigh the
disadvantages. Practicing sports definitely makes a child’s life more colorful.

Word Count: 397

 11 TOEFL Writing Topics

We have specifically chosen topics that incorporate many different

themes on the official test. In other words, the responses in this text could be
slightly adjusted to effectively respond to other topically related questions on
the exam.

For example: What are the qualities of a good parent?

Response: One important quality is the ability to budget and save
money.

A similar response could be crafted for the question:

What is your definition of a successful person?
Response: A successful person is able to budget money and save for the
future.

In both cases, the response could contain the same Phrases, Sentence
Structures, Idioms and Thematic vocabulary to craft a compelling answer.
Learn to “reuse” parts of the system to improve your efficiency and
performance with both written and spoken responses (see “Recycling”, page
19). Using the TIPS system (see page 18), practice your own responses to
the questions listed below.
 ESSAY QUESTIONS

1. Some people think that children should begin their formal

education at a very early age and should spend most of their time
on school studies. Others believe that young children should spend
most of their time playing. Compare these two views. Which view
do you agree with? Why? (Type 3 Question)

2. In twenty years, there will be fewer cars in use than there are today.
Do you agree or disagree with this statement? (Type 4 Question)

3. When people move to another country, some of them decide to

follow the customs of the new country. Others prefer to keep their
own customs. Compare these two choices. Which one do you
prefer? Support your answer with specific details. (Type 3
Question)

4. Which invention in the past century do you think is the most

important: a) the airplane; b) the telephone; c) the automobile
(Type 1 Question)

5. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Because

modern life is very complex, it is essential for young people to have
the ability to plan and organize. (Type 4 Question)
 6. While some say progress is generally positive, others say there are
many negative consequences. Explain your view, giving relevant
reasons and examples. (Type 2 Question)

7. What are some important qualities of a good supervisor (boss)? Use

specific details and examples to explain why these qualities are
important. (Type 1 Question)

8. Some people believe that the Earth is being harmed (damaged) by

human activities. Others feel that human actions makes the Earth a
better place to live. What is your opinion? Use specific reasons and
examples to support your answer. (Type 2 Question)

9. People have different ways of escaping the stress and difficulties of

modern life. What do you think is the best way to reduce stress?
Use specific details and examples in your answer. (Type 1
Question)

10. Some people think that university students should just focus on
their specialized areas while others argue they should take a variety
of courses. What’s your opinion and why? Include details and
examples in your explanation. (Type 2 Question)

11. Some people think that the family is the most important influence
on young adults. Other people think that friends are the most
important influence on young adults. Which view do you agree
with? Use examples to supports your position. (Type 2 Question)
12. Why are modern people living longer? Use specific reasons and
examples to develop your essay. (Type 1 Question)

13. Compare and contrast the advantages of raising kids in the city and
doing so in the countryside. Which do you prefer and why? (Type
3 Question)

14. Famous athletes and entertainers deserve million dollar salaries

every year. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Use
specific reasons and examples to support your opinion. (Type 4
Question)

15. What are the important qualities of a good son or daughter? Use
specific and examples to support your answer. (Type 1 Question)

16. What do you consider to be the most important room in a house?

Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion. (Type
1 Question)

17. A person you know is planning to move to your town or city. What
do you think this person would like and dislike about living there?
Why? Compare the advantages and disadvantages. (Type 3
Question)

18. People work because they need money to live. What are some
other reasons that people work? Discuss one or more of these
reasons. Use specific examples and details to support your answer.
 (Type 1 Question)

19. Students at universities often have a choice of places to live. They

may choose to live in university dormitories, or they may choose to
live in apartments in the community. Compare the advantages of
living in university housing with the advantages of living in an
apartment in the community. Where would you prefer to live? Give
reasons for your preference. (Type 3 Question)

20. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Businesses

should do anything they can to make a profit. Use specific reasons
and examples to support your position. (Type 4 Question)

21. A friend of yours has received some money and plans to use all of
it either to go on vacation or to buy a car. Your friend has asked
you for advice. Compare your friend’s two choices and explain
which one you think your friend should choose. Use specific
reasons and details to support your choice. (Type 3 Question)

22. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People

should sometimes do things that they do not enjoy doing. Use
specific reasons and examples to support your answer. (Type 4
Question)

23. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Always

telling the truth is the most important aspect in any relationship
between people. (Type 4 Question)
24. Is it better to enjoy your money when you earn it or is it better to
save your money for some time in the future? Use specific reasons
and examples to support your opinion. (Type 2 Question)

25. Talk about the educational system in your country and what you
could do to improve it. (Type 1 Question)

26. Are video games more beneficial or harmful? (Type 2 Question)

27. Some people prefer to work for themselves or own a business.

Others prefer to work for an employer. Would you rather be self-
employed, work for someone else, or own a business? Use specific
reasons to explain your choice. (Type 2 Question)

28. Genetic intervention is the process of changing the genes of

organisms using biotechnology. Is genetic intervention more
beneficial or harmful for mankind? (Type 2 Question)

29. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Life today
is easier and more comfortable than it was when your grandparents
were children. (Type 4 Question)

30. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?

Advertising can tell you a lot about a country. Use specific reasons
and examples to support your answer. (Type 4 Question)
31. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Only
people who earn a lot of money are successful. Use specific reasons
and examples to support your answer. (Type 4 Question)

32. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? “It is

better to be a member of a group than to be the leader of a group.”
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. (Type 4
Question)

33. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People are
never satisfied with what they have; they always want something
more or something different. Use specific reasons to support your
answer. (Type 4 Question)

34. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People

should read only materials that are about real events, real people
and established facts. Use specific reasons and details to support
your opinion. (Type 4 Question)

35. A university plans to develop a new research center in your

country. Some people want a center for business research. Other
people want a center in agriculture. Which of these two kinds of
research centers do you recommend for your country? Use specific
reasons in your recommendation. (Type 2 Question)

36. Some young children spend a great amount of their time practicing
sports. Compare and contrast the advantages and disadvantages of
this and give your opinion. Use specific reasons and examples to
support your answer. (Type 3 Question)
 ABOUT THE AUTHORS

Canadian KONNIE WONG is a University of Toronto Alumni who

graduated with Honors. She is an expert in Advanced TESOL teaching, with
specialization in teaching TOEFL and Business English. Certified in ESOL
Examinations issued by the University of Cambridge, Ms. Wong is an ETS
Certified TOEFL Main Administrator as well. In addition, she is certified in
consecutive interpreting and has successfully guided students through the
application process into top tier schools, many with scholarship offers.

Canadian MATTHEW PRESTON is a University of Calgary honors

Alumni, with experience teaching English in Asia for well over a decade. He
has extensive experience teaching a wide range of students, specializing in
Business English and standardized test preparation, including TOEIC,
TOEFL, IELTS and BULATS. He has assisted a wide range of professionals
in achieving their English language goals, including Accountants, Bank
Managers, Corporate Executives, Tech Company Directors and University
Professors.

prestonwongbooks@gmail.com