INSPIRATIONAL MAN EDITION 2021

O2VATE
Ever been to prison?
Learn how three men
changed their lives
from behind bars
to business owners!

David
Phelps
shares with us
how supporting
his daughter
led him from
dentistry to real
estate!

Have you faced

discrimination?
or bias living with a
disability? Two men
share their struggles
of diversity and
inclusion and their Imagine finding out you had
determination to keep a flesh eating disease? Read
pushing upwards. one man’s story of his fight to
conquer Necrotising Facsiitis

ISSUE 11 | NOVEMBER 2021

T H E W IN N I N G F OR MU LA 1
 Contents.
4. As One Door Closes
6. On the Other Side of Failure
8. The Belief Mindset
10. Reaching a Crossroads
12. Defining an Inspirational Man
14. Becoming a Career Criminal
FEATURED
32. Jenga Changed My Life
34. Adaptbility is Key
36. The Attitude of Gratitide
38. Don’t Suffer in Silence
40. Who Are You Really?
42. My Challenge
44. The Question That Changed My Life
46. The Journey
2 3
FROM THE
16. Transforming Lives
EDITOR.
18. EI Saved My Sanity
20. A City of Hope Congratulations to ALL the
men in this issue who put
22. Owning My Freedom themselves forward and
24. My Prison Gap Year took that step to share their
story. We need more men
26. A 360 Degree to share their stories and to
Perspective
understand that they can, and
28. The Unseen Struggle of people will listen. The stories
Cerebral Palsy put forward for this edition
are truly powerful and it was
30. Pets and Debts
a very hard choice for me to
choose Editors Choice this
month.
We started promoting this
one around 6 months ago
and we had hundreds of men
put forward for nomination,
but only a fraction of them
actually submitted stories and
we’ve chosen the best of the
best for this. We hope you
enjoy reading this issue, we
certainly did.
Our Stories from around the
Globe (Women’s edition) has
now been published and
what a fantastic book this
48. Why I’m Here!
is. We’re now producing the
50. Taking The Easy Route men’s edition and this will be
another explosive read once
52. Out of Adversity
it’s published next March!
54. Resilience
Watch this space.
All opinions within these articles
are the writers own.

As One Door Closes
T
he door slammed closed and
I was alone. The room was
small, with painted concrete
walls and a broken window
letting in the cold air. The bed was
wooden, fixed to the wall with
one of those thin blue mattresses
you see on hospital beds. There
was a washbasin and toilet on the
opposite wall by the window. The
date was the 5th April 2011, and I
was in prison!
There are many reasons why I
should not have been there, but I
had to accept that I was.
Acceptance and taking
responsibility for oneself are hard
to do, and many of us fail at the first
hurdle. That’s why we stand still.
The environment was intimidating,
one that I never thought I’d see.
I was in shock. It wasn’t the first
night that was my worst; that was
to come. All I had in my head was
the feeling of anger, the feeling of
being ashamed and thoughts of
how I could get revenge on those
who got me there.
4 55
I found a purpose, and the fulfilment I got from
the results of others drove me on to give more. I
was ready for release but little did I know that life
back in society would be so cruel. I had an uphill
struggle as all the things we take for granted were Philip Mallourides
out of my reach. I could not get a bank account, philipmilton.com
insurance, a credit card, loans, a mortgage or even
The only thing that was getting rent a home. But I persevered. I got help. It took
me through was the photo of my me over three years to be able to tell anyone my
young son, the rest of the time I story; I was too ashamed, too embarrassed to talk
was numb. about it.
My focus was in the wrong place.
I was spending my time thinking Now I do talk about it as much as I can to help inspire others. I use my
about who was to blame, the experiences to help people discover their idea of success and then take them
reasons why I was locked up and on their journey to achieve their best life. Never give up, find your passion,
who I could hate. I had to change; leave the past where it is and concentrate on your future.
I had to accept that this was real
and I was not in control. I knew I
had to let go, and after reaching
the lowest point in my life, the
feeling of ending it all, I came to the
realisation that I was the only one
who could make the difference.
I immersed myself into the
education department, becoming
a teaching assistant and a
Mentor. I helped fellow prisoners
with their Maths and English. 4
I began to focus on my future,
completing qualifications in Life
Coaching, Mentoring, Supporting
Adult Education, Leadership &
Management and more. Helping
others helped me.

T here I am, completely
frozen and unable to
speak. I’m shivering. My
heart about to explode in
front of an audience in the
north pole, at least that’s how
Sweden felt back then coming
all the way from the warm
seas of Venezuela. After a
couple of years of a very strict
selection process, I was given
the incredible opportunity to
represent my country as an
exchange student. All I wanted
since I was five, and at the age
of 16, it finally happened; yes,
dreams do come true.
And dreams can also vanish
very quickly. After not being
able to speak, I apologised
to the audience and left the
auditorium. My first shot,
and I blew it. “I’m a complete
failure, I just ridiculed myself,
they must think I’m stupid
because I couldn’t even start
after so much preparation”, and
so my self-defeating dialogue
continued.
66
on the
other side
of failure
That same night, I’m about
to pick up the phone to tell
my parents in Venezuela that
I’m going back. I had already
rehearsed what I was going to
say, “Mum, Dad, this is not for
me, I don’t think I can do it and
want to fly home right now”.
As I’m about to dial, a memory
came to mind, my teacher from
high school telling me, Ucar,
to succeed in life, you only
need two things, to read the
newspaper and to master public
speaking.
Uc
s e
Jo
The next morning there I am speaking to him, sharing my embarrassing story, to which he
laughed, strangely taking the edge off of the whole situation. At that point, he shared three
things with me:
Speak in short, simple and succinct sentences until you gain
1 more fluency in English and Swedish. I wanted to present in both
languages.
Don’t ask me how it happened,
but I’m glad it did. Use visuals to help you remember and to support your points.
At that moment, like a beam
of light came the image of my
2 Great, I thought because I had brought loads of posters showing
nature, landscapes and more.
English teacher in Sweden, an
incredible person who kept
us entertained, laughing and
engaged while learning loads
during his lessons. 3 Focus on your audience and have a good time with them.
That was a completely new beginning for me.
ar | fi ndin I went back to the same auditorium and
g-e
xc knocked the audience’s socks off. I went on
el to present throughout the country as I was
le supposed to, and the rest is history.
nc
I could’ve given up, and who knows
e.c
where I’d be right now. I’m very glad
o
m
I didn’t. I’m grateful I listened to
that quiet voice inside my head that
guided me through my moment of
despair.
Next time you are faced with failure,
quiet down and listen to the wisdom
that you carry within, look to learn
from the situation and remember to ask
for help.
7
The 30 years later, that persistence,
that belief, that tenacity, and

Belief
dedication has led me to be the
holder of not one but TWO black
belt certificates; a black belt in
Look at the picture, this is the state
Karate and one in Jujitsu, and I am
of my feet; they have been like this

Mindset
now practising stunt martial arts,
since childhood. You can see how
which teaches you those fancy
inverted my big toes are and how
tricks from martial arts movies.
my 2nd toes nearly overlap the 3rd
ones. I’m also quite flat-footed, yet I
The great Jeff Olsen said that
never let these limitations beat me!
some things are “easy to do, and
easy not to do.” It was just as
My childhood days at school were
easy for me to quit martial arts
quite treacherous to say the least.
altogether as it was to focus on
I was badly bullied; many mocked
my possibilities and break free
me for my good nature and told
from that mental prison cell.
me that my feet made me look like
Breaking free and overcoming my
an elf. After a lot of thought and
fears has led to endless, creative
courage, I started Karate aged 11
opportunities which would not
to improve my self-confidence. The
have been foreseeable had I
state of my feet didn’t allow me to
listened to both my inner and
hop or even run fast, let alone jump;
outer demons.
when I started Karate, I almost gave
up because I couldn’t do jump kicks.
Never let your restrictions or your
It made me so angry and upset.
critics dictate to you what you
can and can’t do. You simply find a
However...
way, keep going, and you NEVER
GIVE UP. You take each challenge
Was I going to give my critics the
as an opportunity to grow and flip
victory they craved for? NEVER! It
Satwinder Sagoo your stories to that dream climax
was time to change that story from
satwindersagoo.com you’ve always wanted to happen
one I hated to the one I desired. It
and be brave enough to act that
was time to create a special new
desires chapter out because this
chapter in my life.
is your film...

“I persisted, I persisted, I found a way around

my restrictions and from the point
of not even being able to hop, I was
THIS IS YOUR LIFE!

I found a way starting to do jump kicks. The feel-

good factor was pushing me to do
Boooooooooooooom!

around my
more; gradually, my feet became
more flexible and conditioned
to help me push past my limiting

restrictions” beliefs.

8 9

Reaching a
crossroads
Once upon a time, there was
a young man, he worked in
various production factories,
making car parts to fitted
bedrooms. He had done this
since he was 14 years old when
he got a Saturday job after work
experience. He lived with his
partner in a house he bought at
19 years old, made a good wage
for his age, paid the bills, put
food on the table, taught and
practised martial arts at local
clubs and didn’t really have any
worries.
Dean Palfreyman
primalnf.com
10
Life was good on the surface,
and he knew that there were
many people a lot worse off
than him, but he wasn’t happy.
He felt something was missing
and was fed up of the routine;
working for the weekend, clock
watching all day just waiting
for the bell to ring to say, “time
to go home.” His relationship
wasn’t good, he ended up
splitting up with his partner,
and after 10 years he’d had
enough.
He found himself at a crossroads, one
direction was to continue on this path, not
fulfilled or enjoying life with no end in
sight, or he could make a change! But what
was missing? He realised that one thing that
really made him feel good was his martial
arts, teaching and seeing the looks of joy
and achievement when one of his students
got the next grade or won a competition;
that’s what felt good, helping others achieve.
That young man was me! So, what did I do
about it?
I decided enough was enough, I had to
make a change, and with my new realisation
and love of fitness, I decided to take the
path of a Personal Trainer (PT). I enrolled at
university to study sports science, took my
gym instructors qualifications at the same
time, found a part-time position in a local
gym; I was on the way to becoming what I
wanted to be. I was lucky that my current
employers were understanding enough
to allow me to work part-time, as I still
had bills to pay. It was a tough few years;
balancing two jobs, studying, and getting
assignments in on time, but I had to do it.
So I finished university, found a full-time
gym position, and continued my study to
become a qualified PT. Over the last 18
years I’ve worked for various health clubs
gaining experience in the industry and now
run my own business. I’d done it, it took
time and hard work, but I made the change
that I knew I had to.
My life is totally different now; I have a wife
and two children and live a good life, sure
I have my troubles as everyone does, but
I’m doing something I love, helping others.
I hope this story helps you in some way; if
you’re at a point where you’re not happy,
look for another direction and make the
change; you can make it work if you really
want to.
11
11
 Defining an
Inspirational Man
B eing nominated as an
inspirational man came
as a shock, as I don’t consider
myself to be one. That got
me thinking about how you
become an “inspiration” and
some of the traditional signs
that you would associate with
such a person.
I had an article published
in the second edition of
the magazine dealing with
grief and my mental health
struggles over my life. As a
brief recap, my father died
when I was seven years old,
two weeks before Christmas; I
struggled to accept this, which
led me to be diagnosed with
depression, and I have been
on medication for about ten
years.
Being given the burden of
being the “man of the house”
and helping my mum raise
my two younger brothers
and developing a stammer
- you can imagine my low
confidence and self-esteem
growing up.
But that is what makes me an
Inspirational Man.
12
12
Growing up with a sense of
inferiority as I didn’t have a
father to teach me things that
there is an end in sight. And
that is why, I feel, I have been
nominated to be a part of this
fathers teach their children, special edition.
coupled with the things that
we didn’t do as friends, did In conclusion, you do not
weigh heavily on me. And it know if you are an inspiration
still does. That’s why I try to to anyone unless they know
be the person that he would what you have been through.
have been proud of. Or how you have ended up
in the position you are now
Being a child is all about in. And that sometimes being
having fun and no “afraid” to take that first step
responsibilities, learning as is the thing that is holding
you go, so having the added you back. I know my nieces
pressure put on me by my and nephews, along with the
relatives contributed to my rest of my family, are proud
Mental Health struggles; but of the person I am and hope
also made me who I am today. that someday someone will
The person who was always say, “Your story inspired me,
acting responsibly around and this is what helped me
others, showing respect to through my dark times.”
everyone, and just being a nice
person.
Over the 40 years since his
death, the effect that has
had on me, coupled with the
bad places I have been in
with my Mental Health, may
inspire someone somewhere.
However, what I do know,
is by sharing my story, I am
an inspiration to someone
who is also going through a
tough time in knowing that
Mark Paterson
patersonphotographicservicess.myportfolio.com
13
 Becoming a
Career Criminal
Born in 1958, I began school in 1963 and seemed
like many other children of that age, “normal”.
Elements of my life were not of my choice, my
father was nowhere to be seen, and my mum
had eight of us to look after. Times were tough.
We lived in a top floor flat in Paddington, North
London, but there were many other families
similar to ours, so for me, this life was “normal”.
In those days supermarkets were not like they
are today, and we used a local corner shop called
“Jacks” to buy all our food. By the time I was ten, I
began working at Jacks, filling shelves and serving
customers. If I worked hard, I could earn about £3
each week, which was simply deducted from the
weekly bill my mum ran up.
14
14
Like many teenagers before me, I was interested in motorbikes, and my friend Tony made a living
out of stealing them. He kindly offered to teach me how to ride one, and I was hooked, for me it
was great. I had stopped attending school by this time, I had a “family” of friends around me, and
I felt empowered.
The business that Tony had was based upon the constant need of those who raced motorbikes
to acquire new engines. This was because under race conditions the engines had a very limited
life. We would be asked by a racer to supply a particular engine, and Tony would then find a
motorbike that fitted the need and steal it. The engine would then be removed and sold onto the
racer, and the rest of the bike would be stripped down for sale or scrap.
One day Tony asked me to travel as a pillion rider on his Honda motorbike to nearby Wembley,
he would steal a bike, and I would need to ride his bike back to the workshop. It was a horrible
I grew up rather faster than my day, it was raining, but we did the job, and my life of crime had begun!
schoolmates. I liked junior school
and, in 1969, moved up to senior
“He kindly
school, which I hated with a passion.
They treated me as thick because of
my Dyslexia, so aged 13, I stopped
offered to
attending. But life at Jacks had
another dark side; I began to be
teach me how
physically abused by the owner
himself.
In the ’70s, the phenomena we now
call “Paedophilia” was not recognised to ride one,
and I was
like it is today. I had no one to confide
in, nobody helped me, and as long as
I stayed at the shop, then I expected
that it would continue. Aged 14, as
revenge for the abuse, I set the shop hooked, for
me it was
and his home alight.
I then terrorised him
great.”
both physically and
mentally and found
myself in prison! Upon
release, I became
interested in petty
crime, and some of
the local criminals
encouraged me to join
them.
Edmond
Flanagan
15
15
 Transforming Lives.
Picture this 2014, 5 years into
running my own business, helping my
clients worldwide implement their 7
- 10 figure business transformations
- a devoted husband and father to my
loving, highly supportive family.
Just imagine you take your family
away on holiday in Orlando, Florida,
over Christmas only to be told
you couldn’t take your children on
rollercoasters because you couldn’t
fit in the seats!
I was 24 stone/154kg with symptoms
- aches/pains, lower back problems,
trouble breathing, I tried to change -
getting a gym membership, personal
trainer, downloaded diet plans,
walked 10,000 steps/day, tracked
calories, aiming to eat less, move
more. If a calorie deficit is good, then
a bigger one should gain a faster
result, right?
None of these worked. The gym
membership and PT went unused
because of client deadlines or issues
or not being in the city, county,
or country, which would mean I
wasn’t available. The only thing that
happened regularly was 10,000 steps
per day as I shuffled around offices
between meetings.
16
Until the world’s leading online physique and
lifestyle consultant said to me, “You have to
make this one of your highest values for your
change to succeed.“ Does that mean I have to put
myself before everything else? I had to pin my
On business trips, I had an excuse highest value to my change.
to join in, build rapport, make
change happen, attend fantastic I signed up for a professional custom personal
dinners, not to mention drinks. training and nutrition plan tailored to my body.
I set out my reasons, built a plan, running it like
I tried Karate with my daughter, any incredible transformations I had successfully
kickboxing with friends, delivered. Fitting them into my already rammed
alongside countless diets. I joined schedule, learning how to adapt, so they work
accountability groups; I even wherever I was, whether a luxury gym in
created an accountability group! Dubai, rooftop gym in Prague, basement gym
I paid thousands to gain results, in Bucharest, or local gym near my home. In 12
yet nothing stuck. Nothing could weeks, despite being away from home for 8 of
marry my commitment to my them, I’d dropped over 22lb!
family, friends, or clients with
losing weight. Another 7kg/15lb down over 3 months!
My suits didn’t fit like a young kid playing dress-up with his dad’s clothes. I had to start
replacing my wardrobe regularly. People I’ve known for years pass me by as they don’t
recognise me. I dropped 40kg/88lb in 1 year, despite travel, client engagements, and
COVID lockdowns.
Would you agree that sometimes you have to put yourself first? Be selfish to be selfless!
I’m no longer just existing in life for others. Now I’m living my life for myself. Capable of
cycling for miles, I can perform handstands again. Not sure when that will come in handy
for meetings. Yet feeling reinvigorated certainly does.
Now, I love doing nothing more than helping others
achieve their health, fitness, and lifestyle goals.
Martin Sharp
sharpfitforlife.com
17
17
 EI Saved In 2004 I was awaiting the
birth of my twins’ when I
my Sanity
got the news of my mum
passing away. She was to
visit me in the UK from my
home country, Pakistan but
had committed suicide.
I was devastated. One
minute I was expecting to
see her, and the next, she’s
gone. The biggest hurt was
that she had taken her own
life. Neither my family back
home nor I had picked any
signs of her being in chronic
depression. It was ironic
that we have two health
professionals in our family,
both very well experienced
and frontline workers.
Maybe the people closest
are easy to miss.
Sam Dossa
linktr.ee/coachsamuk
“There were so many questions I
wanted to ask mum.”
18
18
I couldn’t visit to pay my last respects at her funeral because of my family responsibilities.
This hurt me further, and I slipped into depression. There were so many questions I
wanted to ask mum. Why did she do this? Did I pressure her to come to the UK? Maybe
she resented this. Was she unhappy where she was? Was something bothering her? How
come my brothers and their wives had not noticed anything? I was so angry about the
whole situation; the more I tried to reason with what’s and whys, the further my thoughts
got entangled, causing me pain and upset.
I felt helpless.
Being a man started to feel like a curse. I was expected to have it all under control, but I
so did not feel like this. Social and mental pressure was building up, and I gave in. I started
getting counselling which gave me some relief and helped me manage my thoughts.
I began to see that I was not alone in this struggle. Many men hide their true selves
beneath the demeanour of machismo, digging their heels in.
I decided that enough was enough!
After completing my counselling sessions and gaining mental and emotional stability,
I enrolled on a counselling course to be qualified to help others. I took on personal
responsibility to be the man who doesn’t need to pretend to be something he isn’t. I
decided to undo all my social and cultural conditioning and reprogramme myself to live a
healthier, happier, and fulfilled life.
I became a qualified Emotional Intelligence (EI) coach, able to recognise where things
aren’t right and how they can be corrected. Often we don’t need to do anything; EI
teaches us acceptance and awareness and techniques to implement these. I have
accepted my mum is gone and that it must have been painful for her. I have also accepted
that for me personally, the incident was a wake-up call. Had this not happened, I would
still be on the hamster wheel.
I am a proud father of three girls, and I use EI as a shield, cushion, and mentor to resolve
and deal with situations. I also share my knowledge, learning and experiences with my
clients so they can progress in any area of their lives using EI.
Emotional intelligence truly saved my sanity and continues to do so every single day.
19
19
 A City of Hope
I grew up on a Council Estate in the UK,
known as “The Projects “, in the US. The
residences of low-income families, the
unemployed and the unemployable.
Relying on state benefits that keep
them in poverty or luxury, depending
on how well you can work the system.
Notorious for being overrun with drugs
and violence. Gangs and bullies on
every street corner.
My Council Estate was no exception.
Most of the estates’ gang members
lived on my street and they made my
life hell. Bullied at school, then home to
the bullies and gangs on the streets.
Enduring years of physical, mental and
emotional abuse, it got to the point
where I planned suicide at ten years
old and survived a suicide attempt at
sixteen. My life was desperate.
Once, the notoriety of my Council
Estate saved me from a beating. Visiting
a friend in the next town, three huge,
strong guys stopped me.
“Hey, this is our area. What are you
doing here, and where are you from?”
one of them demanded.
20
“Seeing my friend and I am from the
Flower Estate.” I replied.
All three of them stepped back
visibly shaken, apologising profusely;
they kept on backing away. They had
My mindset over money and unworthiness I became Mayor of my city and resolutely
heard how tough the Flower Estate”
screaming in my ear, everything is ‘Hopeless’. instigated the changes until I was free of
was.
the Mentality of the Council Estate.
“Why bother. You can’t escape the Council
One of the biggest issues on a
Estate Mentality” tore at my identity each day. You too can become Mayor of your city,
Council Estate is that there is an
of your life.
invasive attitude of “NO HOPE”.
And it was hopeless. I was without hope.
They have no hope and no great
You want “Hope”, then seize this moment
desire to better or escape their
Until an “A-Ha” moment. to break free.
circumstances. The only escape
for many, oblivion in cheap drugs.
A path lit up before me. A way to escape the What are you waiting for? Go and
Content to live like that for the rest
Council Estate for good. become Mayor of your own city.
of their days.
I would become Mayor of my own city. A city
I, on the other hand, could not wait
called Hope.
to escape. As soon as I was able, I left
this prison.
Unworthiness was banished beyond its walls.
However, the Council Estate had
Poverty replaced by the riches of self-worth.
not left me. It hounded me for years.
An inner voice heckled me at every
The potholes of despair filled in.
opportunity. You see, even though
I had physically ‘left’ the Council
The slums of shame regenerated into towers
Estate, the mindset and mentality
of honour.
were ingrained deep within me.
As Mayor, I make the rules; I make the laws;
I push forward with change.
Kevin Hill
kevinhill.co.uk 21
 Owning my freedom
David Phelps
freedomfounders.com

Do you consider yourself to be successful?

If so, what does that mean to you?

Does it mean having a certain amount of money in the bank? Living in a certain zip code? Being recognised
as a leader in your industry? Or even having an impact on the world in a meaningful way?
So after evaluating my options, So I committed to putting the
I sold my dental practice and strategies and tactics I teach my
I believe all of these things are valid signs that you have achieved success.
invested the cash into real estate. members into the hands of as
At first, this meant less income, many people as possible. When
But I believe there is another, more significant sign, which most never achieve.
but it gave me the flexibility to I sat down and started writing,
spend time with my daughter, I covered not just how to build
That is freedom.
and as I continued to invest, my life-changing, generational
income grew. wealth, but also the mindset
And when I say freedom, I don’t just mean financial freedom, although that is paramount to true success.
that’s needed to achieve that and
I mean freedom in all forms. The freedom to live your life as you see fit, unencumbered by government or
Along the way, other dentists how to create a lasting positive
society. (So long as you’re not hurting others, of course.)
began to ask how I was impact in the world.
supporting my family after
I say this because I know exactly how important freedom is.
selling my practice. They saw the The end result was my latest
freedom I now had and wanted book, Own Your Freedom.
While I’ve always been what most would consider successful, I haven’t always had freedom. That didn’t
the same for themselves. I shared
seem to matter when life was going smoothly, but it became my number one priority when my daughter was
my knowledge freely, and many I know the profound impact that
suddenly facing leukaemia, epilepsy, and late-stage liver failure.
started asking to invest in my this approach to investing had on
deals. That quickly evolved into my life, my family, the
My career as a dentist provided substantial income, but I wasn’t able to take time away from my practice to
Freedom Founders, the investing members of Freedom Founders,
support my daughter during this crisis. So I had to choose between supporting my daughter in the fight for
and mastermind community I and the communities they live in.
her life or continuing to work and receive income.
run today. Now, I’m on a mission to do the
same for as many people as I can.
For me, the choice was easy. I chose my daughter.
But as powerful as that company
was, it still wasn’t possible to help
But this meant I had to radically transform my life. I needed time to support my daughter, but I also still
most people.
needed income to support my family.

22
22 23
 My Prison Gap Year
21 years old, standing in Crown Court- before this day, I was a
medical student studying at Plymouth University from a South Asian
working-class family in Northwest London. It was surreal as the
jury read my verdict, “guilty”. My world came crashing down; there
was no hope of me graduating as a doctor now; I was sentenced to
2 years 8 months in prison for three deleted messages on my phone
that associated me with the sale of cannabis. Six years of work,
through school, university, and my free time taken from me in the
bang of a gavel.

Prison for me was the school of life, I had gone from a privileged
medical student with a promising future to a convict. Given a prison
number, a small cell with a toilet and some plastic cutlery to get by
with. Due to shortages in the prison system, I remember using the
same two pairs of boxer shorts over two weeks, washing them in my
sink at the end of each day and leaving them to dry. Within my first
month, there was a suicide, seven different violent incidents and
shortages in everything from clothes to hot water.

As each day passed, it got easier as I found acceptance and meaning

in my situation. Yes, I had lost my hope of becoming a doctor, I had
lost my freedom and felt ashamed for my family and friends, but
it was not the end. I stood there in that moment and decided that
I wouldn’t let a judge choose my fate. I wanted to be a doctor as I
wanted to impact people’s lives using my intellect and appetite for
learning. My mind searched for solutions; I deduced that I could have
a much larger and significant impact by becoming an entrepreneur.

Upon release from prison, I went onto attain a BSc (Hons)

The definition of an entrepreneur is an individual who partakes in
value creation activities that result in social, cultural or commercial
value. I aimed to embody that definition in my lifestyle and actions
from that point on. I began teaching on the wing about financial
literacy, entrepreneurship and lifelong learning. From this birthed
the idea of 3T, an incubator to help empower individuals from all
backgrounds. That pivotal moment where I decided to reframe my
narrative and focus on finding meaning in my struggle changed my
life.
Medical Biochemistry, MSc Innovation Management and
Entrepreneurship while starting a digital marketing and
business development agency targeting SMEs and non-profit
organisations. My magnum opus is my community interest
company, 3T Collective; a human incubator aimed at providing
individuals from all backgrounds with the tools, skills and
resources necessary to attain their professional, academic or
entrepreneurial vision.
My message to anyone out there is simple; no matter where you
are, no matter how bad it feels, you have a choice There’s power
in realising that it’s all down to you. Accept what you cannot Sobanan Narenthiran
change while fighting for what you can. 3tcollective.com

24 25

A 360 degree
Perspective
Anthony Frisina
anthonyfrisina.ca
To inspire, first and foremost, you must
be inspired, and to me that came at such
a young age. Being born with a disability
(spina bifida and hydrocephalus), my parents
to this day have been an integral part of the
man I have grown up to be some 41(ish)
years later.
But to be inspired happened to me when I
was 8 years old. My parents entrusted me to
go to this camp, which was inclusive, called
Camp Marydale. They had a one-to-one
program for kids with disabilities. This was
the first time being outside of my comfort
zone, with no family or core group of
friends. I was starting to carve my own path.
My mom dropped me off at the bus stop that
morning and she and I were both nervous
wrecks, not knowing what to expect.
26
With staff support, I got on the bus and the
travels began.
As we got on to the campgrounds, I was
last off the bus as I needed the support.
Exiting the bus, I was approached by a man
who said, “Hi, my name is John, welcome
to Camp Marydale.” That statement would
open my eyes up to a whole new world. That
statement taught me that I belonged and that
I mattered. I would go on 30ish years later
to live a life based on how he inspired me
and how he showed me that I belonged and
that I mattered! At 8 years old and a kid with
a physical disability, belonging is critical to
growth and development. John is one of the
best friends that I have; he believed in me. I
am grateful.
As my life continued, my
confidence grew, conquering
various milestones, high school
graduation, college graduation,
employment. Finally, it was time
for me to give back. In 2015, in
what started as a passion project,
I began to encapsulate my life in
short stories to engage the reader.
I had no intention to publish at
the time. But as I continued to
write, I met someone who is now
a good friend of mine, and they
encouraged me to finish my story
and publish.
2016 would be a difficult year;
losing my mom wasn’t easy,
but “Above and Beyond” was
created in her honour. I became a
published author, a talk show host
and producer, actor, coach, and
consultant in the world of access
and inclusion. I vowed that lived
experience was going to count
for more than it typically does.
I have been told that I inspire.
In my world, I am grateful that
you feel inspired, but it takes a
village. I believe inspiration is in
allyships and a call to action, and a
responsibility for everyone. To lead
is to empower, and to empower
is to progress and progress with
momentum. We must trust in
one another and work together.
Where there is a win for access
and inclusion, there is a win for
collective prosperity.
27
27

The Unseen Struggle
of Cerebral Palsy
T
hey say the world is in your hands,
but when you’re living with cerebral
palsy (CP), the world is as hard to
hold as a basketball. Over the course of 32
years, I’ve always factored my disability
into my life and choosing a career was
no different. I wasn’t going to let future
opportunities slip away because of my daily
challenges. Despite living with spasticity,
speech articulation issues and needing a
wheelchair, I soldiered through college to
28
28
Shortly after graduating, I met with
an architect who acted as a sounding
board as I explored employment options.
In our meeting, we discussed career
options and my portfolio, which he was
impressed with. He hammered home the
importance of starting from the bottom,
which I obviously was, and that I should
sweep floors on job sites if I had to. At
that point, it wasn’t clear whether he
fully understood my situation or not, but
I decided to ask if he would allow me to
volunteer for his architecture firm. He
immediately declined by saying, “I don’t
have time to oversee something like that.”
It was like a slap in the face. Dismissing
the issue by referring to my situation as
“something like that” wasn’t the response
I was expecting considering his earlier
suggestion to volunteer. I left that meeting
feeling down, but not out.
graduate with honours as an architectural
technician. And that was the easy part.
For years, I’ve been struggling to get my
career off the ground. Even though my
work is impressive, every job interview
ends the same way. “We’ve decided to go
in a different direction.” I have no trouble
getting interviews, but they end rather
abruptly once they see and hear me.
A few months later, I learned through a
mutual friend that her daughter, who was in
high school at the time, applied for a co-op
placement with that same architecture firm.
She landed the placement and worked under
the same architect I met with a few months
earlier. I couldn’t believe that a student
with little to no skill was hired before me,
someone who graduated with honours and
knows architectural design in and out. I was
happy for her, but I felt deceived.
I know I’m not the only person who has faced
these types of situations, but it’s always a
bitter pill to swallow. There aren’t many
architects where I live, yet finding work
with CP has been next to impossible. I’ve
submitted dozens of resumes to businesses
in buildings that weren’t wheelchair
accessible. How is that still possible? It often
feels like we’re forgotten by the world, and
that’s why I became a voice for the disabled
in our community a few years ago. I’ve since
written a book, provide advice to families
with disabled children, and attend events
to make sure we’re seen and heard. Our
voice needs to be in the conversation. But
the question is, can society look past my
wheelchair to hear what I have to say?
Kyle N. Scott
kylenscott.ca
29
 pets and debts
There are certain things that can happen to you during your life, and the top three most
stressful sometimes come in this order: death of a loved one, moving house and divorce. What happens when plans get messed up? Should we actually plan
for every eventuality, or does that remove our spontaneity?
I’ve completed all three, plus some others, and have the t-shirt to show for it too.
In my previous career, it was almost the law that you wanted a
And the scars. bigger house, a better car, and definitely a divorce. Come on,
everyone in that profession has to have at least one divorce, don’t they?
In fact, the scars are almost like a badge of honour. They show that you have ‘been there,’ and
have faced life’s greatest challenges and come through. What they never show is just how deep I had one. A horrible one. One which left me traumatised with a range of emotions: grief,
those wounds actually are. sadness, anger, disbelief, and finally realisation that it would never be fixed, no matter what I
thought. I tried to make it work, but this choice was outside of my control. As the working partner,
Yes, people see the surface damage, the I was left with the house, the majority of the pets, and all the debts, which I had no option but to
‘gosh, you’ve changed’ response when continue paying. And it nearly broke me.
they meet you after such a trauma, and
their friendly offer of help is welcomed, But I made a choice, a choice to survive and carry on. Believe me, there were times early on that
but can they actually really help get you when I did eventually get some fitful sleep, I didn’t want to wake up. But I did, and I kept going.
back on your feet? Slowly, painfully sometimes, and I went through the first three months and came out alive.

Or do you have to go it alone? And it made me a better person. The bubble burst and I took control of my life, got things
organised, and carried on.
Well, life is all about choices. The
choices we make, the choices others My relationship with my ex is now good; we get on and talk as adults with each other.
make, and the choices that are outside
of our hands and over which we have And there is someone out there waiting for you too, as I found out.
no control.
My advice is this. Dwelling on the past will hold you back and tie
It’s true that we have a certain plan for you down to something which no longer exists, no matter how
our lives, and this is what we aim for much you long for it. Start afresh, take on a new challenge and live
right from schooldays. Get a job, get a your best life.
partner, kids (perhaps), nice house and
car, some debt, some savings, lovely
holidays, a better house, retirement.

“The bubble
burst and I
took control
of my life” Mark Wood
mynlpworks.co.uk

30 31
 How JENGA Changed My Life
I quietly paced up and down
behind the stage area, my
eyes were closed as I mentally
rehearsed my talk, visualising
every slide and audience reaction.
I could hear the event organiser
beginning my introduction; I
took a deep breath and a smile
crossed my face as I felt that
wave of gratitude descend over
me. I was about to step out
on stage and share my story
in front of hundreds of other
Entrepreneurs…how did I ever
get here…my thoughts drifted
bay to that morning in December
2010…
It was a cold winters morning,
the sky was blue and the winter
sun was low in the sky, I could
hear the leaves on the ground
crunching as I walked through the
woodland into the clearing.
32
My breath froze in front of me as I let out a sigh…
“I can’t go on, “the world and my family would be
better off without me.”
Minutes earlier, I had told my wife I was going for
a walk to clear my head, to think about our options
and the next steps…that was a lie…
I had no intentions of returning home that
morning, I had made the decision to take my own
life.
Just three years earlier I had it all, a successful multi
six-figure property development business with my
wife; we drove our dream cars, lived in our dream
home, and went on dream vacations!
Now I was standing there having lost the business
in the financial crash, lost a six-figure
investment with another financial company,
been almost killed in a car accident, lost the cars,
bankrupt and staring at the real possibility of losing
our home. I was done.
Centre
Feature
So how did I get from there to here?
JENGA!
What…yeah, that’s right, JENGA.
During my journey from that dark moment to
standing at the side of that stage, I discovered
many things, but the biggest breakthrough was
when I understood that ALL our behaviour
is BELIEF driven, so in order to change my
behaviours, I needed to change my BELIEFS.
I realised that the JENGA tower is just like any
behaviour pattern, it is built and supported by
a set of blocks (beliefs and conditionings); if I
could figure out and remove all the blocks that
supported that specific behaviour pattern, it
would collapse, just like the Jenga tower and
I would be free from the behaviour pattern
forever.
I made it my mission to discover the blocks
that support the most destructive behav-
iour patterns for entrepreneurs and business
owners, patterns like Procrastination, Perfec-
tionism, Fear of Public Speaking and Fear of
Rejection and develop a method to help them
end them permanently just like I had done.
Se I now know that we are capable of more Dean Fox
than we ever think, we can be, do and have www.deanafox.com
whatever it is we want, providing we are will-
ing to give up the beliefs that support our own
JENGA towers.
“Please welcome to the stage…”
33

18
Adaptability is
The lesson was that the
ability to adapt is the key
the Key
to success.
As a new Realtor, I started
by following traditional
“best practices” and then
adapting based on what
I was just a teenager when my mother lost her job. I had worked or didn’t. Before
to accept the fact that life was about to change whether I long, I was one of the top-
liked it or not. No more carefree days. I had to adapt to our producing Realtors in
new circumstances and find a way to support our family. America.
Otherwise, we would soon be homeless.
I didn’t stop there, though.
I vividly remember reading an article in the Dallas Business Most people achieve a
Journal about real estate and deciding that this would be my certain level of success
path. and settle into their ways.
They think, “Don’t fix
Adapting to face that challenge changed my life. It not only what’s not broken.” They
Josh DeShong helped provide the income we needed, but it also taught me a don’t realise that what
trelly.com valuable lesson. isn’t broken today will,
34
“Before long, I was one
of the top-producing
Realtors in America.”
over time, break. We must
continuously adapt to life’s
changing circumstances.
Your industry. Technology.
The economy. Everything.
So I continuously adapted
to ensure I stayed at the
top.
I decided that while I
loved being a Realtor, I
wanted more certainty,
especially considering the
experience that got me
into the industry in the first
place. So I adapted again
by becoming a real estate
investor while continuing
to work as a Realtor.
I already had the
knowledge, and as a
Realtor, I had access to
data others don’t. I also
heard about properties
before they hit the market,
and I had built a network
of buyers, sellers, and
lenders. This was a perfect
opportunity because it
enabled me to create a new
revenue stream from what I
was already doing.
And in addition to the
revenue, I was now building
a portfolio of assets. This
gave me more certainty
because now I had two
streams of income and a
real estate portfolio that
was increasing in value.
But I didn’t stop adapting
here, either. (Are you
seeing a pattern yet?)
As I scaled the real
estate investing side of
my business, performing
hundreds of transactions
each year, I realised that
the traditional acquisition
and disposition channels
were not scalable. So I
built a software platform
to streamline the process,
allowing me to profitably
scale past my current
position. Since its
inception, it has already
been used to conduct over
$170 million in GMV.
And while this is a game-
changer right now, it’s
only one more step in
the constant process of
adaptation. Someday well
into the future, this may
too lose its effectiveness,
and I’ll have to adapt yet
again.
This is all a part of
the process, and it’s
what separates great
entrepreneurs from
average entrepreneurs. If
you want to perform at the
top of your industry, it’s
exactly what you need to
do, too.
35
35
 The Attitude of Gratitude (TAG) Chris DT Gordon
chrisdtgordon.com

“You can’t always get what you want.”

The Rolling Stones said it best, but we all know the truth of this statement. We create Becky, my wife, drove me to
plans and scheme tirelessly, expecting our efforts to produce the exact fruits of our the hospital’s emergency room.
desire precisely how we imagined it would go. However, life has a way of changing our Medical professionals tried their
plans in unexpected ways. best, but the hospital eventually
stated that my situation was
Sometimes, those unexpected changes are painful. beyond them, and I was flown
to the Mayo Clinic in Rochester,
Really, really painful. MN, where I was diagnosed
with necrotising fasciitis (flesh-
Before March 18, 2015, I had a great family, a good job, and enjoyed a decent life, no eating bacteria). Once doctors
overwhelming drama or challenges. This was the life I thought I wanted. knew the extent of my illness,
they prepped me for surgery and
On March 18, I merely scratched my right hand on an exterior garage wall. Three days placed me in a medically induced
later, I woke up to find a lacrosse ball-sized bump on my right elbow. Within 10 hours, coma for five days. In that
that bump had spread so that it tripled the size of my right arm. time, they performed several
life-saving and reconstructive
I looked like the Incredible Hulk in mid-transformation. surgical procedures.
I woke up after my coma not only
with extensive physical trauma,
but I had begun dealing with
increasingly negative thoughts.
“What am I going to look like
when/if I fully heal?” “How will
this affect my relationships/
mindset/finances?”
“But if you try sometimes, well,
you might find…”
A couple of days after I woke
up, Becky told me about how
people in our lives helped us
out. Learning about those acts
of kindness washed away those
negative thoughts and helped
me develop The Attitude of
Gratitude (TAG).
TAG challenged me to ask three questions:
1.“What good things do you have in your life?”
2.“Who do you appreciate, and why?”
3.“How can you give someone else a reason to
be grateful?”
By answering these questions daily, I
developed the positive, grateful, and resilient
mindset that motivated me to not only
proactively participate in my own recovery,
but also establish (and accomplish) several
personal goals. I’ve also become a professional
speaker who shares TAG with young adults.
“You get what you need!”
While I was living a pretty good life before my
hospitalisation, TAG has greatly increased not
only my gratitude but also my social impact. I
now have a greater purpose than just having a
good life.
We’re only here for a short amount of time, so
we must make the most of it. By realising the
value of what we already possess, letting those
we love know how much they mean to us, and
giving others reasons to be grateful, we can
make the world around us a better place!

36
36 37
37
 Sam Ortyl
samortyl.com

After that experience, I made a promise to myself that I will do everything that I
can to never find myself in the same situation again.

It took me close to a year to recover from drinking, battle anxiety and start
creating a different path. Significant changes to every area of my life were
necessary for me to move forward and start looking after myself better. It was
the most challenging thing that I have done in my life, but it has brought me to
the best experiences and to the most amazing people that I have met.

Through my struggle, I have learned that you don’t need to suffer in silence and pretend.
There are a lot of people who are willing to support you. Talking about your problems
and asking for help is not a sign of weakness but a sign of courage.

If you are going through something challenging, don’t stop, don’t give up; life can get
better for you. Sometimes your darkest days and most challenging experiences will lead

Don’t suffer in silence you to the best moments of your life.

You are important! Your life matters! You deserve support! You deserve a better life!
My journey started with a personal struggle. For eight years, I have suffered from severe
anxiety, panic attacks, periods of depression and substance abuse. All this drove me to almost
complete self-destruction and being close to suicide. Like many men with mental health
challenges, I chose to suffer in silence and use alcohol to “cure” my problems.

During all that time I became a master at hiding my struggle. Nobody knew what I was really
going through, including my family, closest friends, and the girl I was dating at the time. All
these years I have pretended that everything was great and that I was happy with how my life
was going, but on the inside, I was riddled with anxiety, fear, and worry.

I felt too embarrassed and ashamed to talk to anyone about what I was really going through. I
didn’t feel like I could ask for help; I didn’t feel like I deserved help or that anyone really cared.
All the stereotypes about how men should be didn’t help either; they only made me feel weaker
and more hopeless.

The turning point came when I smashed my face on the proverbial rock bottom. A heavy
drinking binge that ended up with a trip to A&E and a visit to the psych ward. No, I didn’t have
an accident while I was drunk. I realised that after a few days of heavy drinking, I was not able
to stop, and I was totally unable to function without alcohol. At that point, I knew that I had
to do something about my situation, or it would not end well for me. So, I chose to go to the
hospital and ask for help; it was one of the most difficult things I have done in my life.

38 39
39
 Who
are
“So, what do you do for a living?”
It’s the well-versed ice breaker question we all
ask whenever we meet someone for the very first
time.
We could ask, “So, what do you do in life?” or “So,
tell me about yourself ”. But no, that would just
seem strange, wouldn’t it? So instead, we always
start with the more conventional “So, what do
you do for a living?” It’s so normal that we ask it
without giving it a second thought.
Philip Horrod
WorkLife180.com
40
40
you
really ?
Looking back over my career, I often welcomed the
question being asked of me when I met someone
new. My answer gave me a sense of pride in what I
did for a living, that my career was important, and
that my job title gave me some sort of ‘professional
standing’ among my peers that I otherwise wouldn’t
have.
I’m sure my answer even gave me a little sense of
subconscious superiority sometimes, depending on
what the person asking did for a living themselves.
A bit like a real-life version of the Top Trumps card
game, but purely based around job titles.
18
The answers I gave over the
various stages of my career
ranged from the initial “I’m
a trainee accountant, to “I’m
a qualified Accountant”, then
most recently, “I’m a Business Development Director”.
Then, one day, I suddenly stopped wanting to tell people what I did for a living. You see,
in-between time, I suffered a stress-related break-down, having completely burned myself
out. Not the kind of burnout that simply needs a few weeks off work to recover from, but the
mother of all burnouts, which meant I had to give up working altogether.
Thankfully, I was fortunate enough to retain both my family and our home. My job, however,
was another thing completely. It disappeared, along with my sense of identity, my confidence
and my sense of purpose.
Now when someone asked what I did for a living, I avoided the subject, telling them I was
‘in-between jobs’ or that I’d taken time out to consider what I wanted to do next. What I
didn’t do was tell them the truth, that I didn’t actually ‘do’ anything now.
After a while though, I began to realise there were, in fact, huge benefits from no longer
having to spend 3 hours a day commuting, needing to hit yet another deadline or work at
weekends just to keep up.
The biggest benefit by far was now having time to spend with our children, taking them to
school, picking them up and just being there for them whenever they needed it.
It gradually dawned on me that there’s no shame in being a stay-at-home Dad, just as there’s
no shame in being a stay-at-home Mum.
Now I can’t wait to meet new people and tell them what I do for a living. After all, it’s the
hardest but most rewarding ‘job’ I’ve ever had.
41
41
 My C hallenge
I married Elaine on June 6th 1970.
We had two sons, Paul, born in 1974
and David in 1977. My life seemed
complete, with a career as Service
Manager for a large equipment
manufacturer in Wandsworth,
London. Clearly, I could not foresee
the future, but events conspired to
make me review my life direction.
My challenge arrived when my
employer suggested that I might
like to change careers within the
organisation and move over to a
sales role. I was interested because
it seemed to offer a higher salary,
job satisfaction/challenge, and a
new way of life that would benefit
my family and myself. I was asked
to consider taking a job that could
either be based in Bournemouth or
Birmingham.
42
42
I set out to consider my options. Both
areas were inviting, but the economics
of the offer meant that Birmingham was
the better one. The challenge was simple,
if I selected Birmingham, would it be
accepted by my wife and two sons, would
they move with me, or would it destroy
the family?
Advice came from a close friend I could
talk to on the phone, although she and
her family lived overseas. One Saturday
morning, I phoned and discussed the
choices open to me. Her advice was to
explain to Elaine that this opportunity
was rare and would turn out well, that I
had no desire to split the family up, but
that I honestly felt we should all go.
What a challenge, such high stakes, so
what did I do?
I took the advice, started the new
job in Birmingham on April 1st
1980, and lived in a hotel for three
months before our house in Surrey
was sold, and we bought a new
home in Worcestershire. I rose to
the biggest challenge I had ever had
up until that point.
Sadly, it did not all go well because
in 1983 Elaine decided she wanted
a divorce.
That was major challenge number
two; what do I do now? As before,
I took the advice of close friends,
stayed living in the family home for
a short while (this was very hard
to do ), and then began the story of
the rest of my life.
I fell in love with the lady who was I rose to the
losing her husband to my wife, a
situation I had no prior warning
of, and nor did she! A business biggest challenge
colleague advised me to at least
move in with her as a lodger and
see what might happen. Diane had I had ever had up
three girls, and I had two boys;
would five children be easy? The
story ended well, as we are now until that point.
almost 38 years married, have a
wonderful family, grandchildren
and great-grandchildren, what a
result.
Do I have regrets? Very few.
Have I succeeded in overcoming
my challenges? Well, you be the
judge… but I think so.
John Robert Reed
theoldfellah.co.uk
43
43
 As I stood there in the delivery room, helpless to what was happening,
the doctor said the words no parent ever wants to hear, “He’s not
going to make it.” My soul was crushed hearing those words. I felt

The Questions helpless. As a parent, my duty was to protect my children, and here
I was, standing in a room completely unable to do anything. That’s
when I asked the questions that turned that moment into a force for

That Changed
positive change.

My Life
As I stood there in the labour and delivery room, holding my son,
Scott, in my arms, I asked myself three questions:

What good is here that I’m not seeing?

In February of 2016, my life was shattered. I
found myself in a place where no parent should
ever be, holding my son who had just passed
away, stillborn. What got me through this life
altering moment in time? How did I come out
stronger? And how did I transform this into a
story of positive hope? Below I share all of that.
What can I give?
What can I celebrate?
These questions re-directed my mind to those of finding the positive
in the negative. What good was here that I’m not seeing? My wife
was still alive and recovering. What can I give? All I could give in
that moment was my strength, love, and compassion for my wife.
What could I celebrate? An odd question to ask in a time of loss, but
I searched for the answer. I could celebrate that my son had been my
best man at the wedding.

Two months earlier, my wife and I celebrated

our marriage. We went on our honeymoon to My mission now is to
the warm, sandy beaches of Aruba. We met empower people around
in high school and got married on our 10-year the world to turn negative
anniversary. We were overjoyed that we had a experiences into positive
baby on the way. Not long after, our lives were outcomes by having
changed forever. authentic, real, and inspiring
conversations, by asking the
empowering questions, and
It was early February. Snow covered the by making each day matter.
ground, and it was bitter cold. My wife woke up I’m happy to say that now,
in the middle of the night screaming because after 8 miscarriages, my
of a pain in her stomach. We rushed to the wife and I have a beautiful
hospital and were told that she had to stay; daughter who would not
something was wrong. We were told that our be here if my son had not
baby was too early for delivery; he was only 23 gone through what he did.
weeks, just shy of his lungs being developed. I He paved the way for her to
remember going home to grab some essential come into this world, as any
items, toothbrushes, a pillow, some toothpaste, big brother would.
when I received the message from my wife, “My
water just broke.”

Jacob Lethbridge
jacoblethbridge.com

44 45
45
 To be able to connect through When you speak your truth, there
human values, highlighted the will always be people who don’t

The Journey
reality of corporate leaders during
these challenging times. They too
have been impacted in many ways.
To positively guide and support
them through their journey was
another humbling experience.
agree with you, and that’s OK!
Influencing others is not always
appreciated. Will you influence
people? Without a shadow of a
doubt. Will it always be positive?
Mostly. Is it worth it? Always!

Everyone matters! It is time for all
of us to set our perceptions, our
beliefs, our calcified ideologies
aside and reach out to our fellow
human beings.
Jan Robberts kileadership.com
Stephen Covey quoted: “Try
to understand before being
understood”. We need to stop
The journey of a Global Influencer is scary, exciting, humbling, encouraging, reacting to everything around us
definitely challenging but always immensely satisfying. and start to respond from within.
We do this by respecting others as
Being bullied as a child was probably one of the greatest gifts I received human beings.
in my young life. It taught me an early lesson on serving others, as I was
desperate to belong, to fit in. I also experienced several broken relationships,
and dark, difficult times on the death of a dear friend. I delved deep into my work
to forget, but I never stopped developing myself.
We all influence some people. The
big question is not how many you
will influence, but how you influence
them.
It took resilience, perseverance, and
hard work, and is an ongoing process
but, the brilliant part is that it’s
achievable.
I am a person whose inner voice
inspired me to do bigger things
…and I listened!

I needed to overcome many limiting That led me to Squatter camps

beliefs, which started by making a
few seemingly insignificant decisions
at an early age. Looking back, those
were major milestones as they
awakened my curiosity in personal
development, a growth journey that I
intentionally pursue every single day.
No excuses why I couldn’t, instead
reasons why I could, had to, and
must continue to do so, by making
intentional choices. We are free to
make our own choices, but we are
never free from their consequences.
That’s why our development is so
important. Not as a ‘someday thing’
but an everyday thing.
I made a powerful choice to leave
a job I loved for a journey of
significance.
46
with our values-based leadership
program, where we saw much
hardship, yet many amazing and
resourceful people who were
hurting from poverty, gender-
based violence, Xenophobia and
a long list of other injustices not
being talked about or addressed.
To see and feel the impact in so
many areas inspired me to do "We need to
more. I learned lessons I never
expected; compassion, kindness, stop reacting
love, integrity, and appreciation
being just some of them. to everything
I also worked with young leaders
and upskilled them with my
around us and
experience and knowledge,
allowing them to impact 20 start to respond
schools. This is what collaborative
partnerships look like. from within."
47
 Why I’m here
The greatest story you have is the one about yourself!

I was four days away from getting married and knew

that I had to make some serious changes.

This was in October 2014, and with just four days to

go, I made the toughest decision of my life; I could see
the rest of my life being so much different if, for once,
I followed my intuition instead of going through with
things and living a life not being true to myself.

No matter how hard things would get, I knew that I

had done the right thing.

For years I had lost my sense of purpose, I was stuck in

a dead-end job, and I didn’t feel like this was the life I
was going to live until I retired.

I was a lost soul, stuck in the comfort zone but knew I

had the potential for much more.
Shortly after calling off the wedding, I decided it was
time to leave my career. I had worked in retail for
nearly 16 years, where I went through the ranks and
finished as a Security Manager.
Around this time, I had started doing more security
work with the aim of having my own business, but it
wasn’t that easy. I enjoyed the work I was doing from
Film Premieres, VIP and Royal Parties, Film and TV,
Sporting Events and much more.
Adam Claxton
claxtoncoaching.com
During this time, I had my first encounters
with my mental health.
Some days my motivation had just gone, I
struggled to leave the house, often putting
back going to the gym or to the shops to get
food.
I just couldn’t switch it off. I was feeling
depressed and anxious about the future and
often wondered whether life would be better
without me being here.
To help, I would watch motivational videos
which often left me feeling upbeat and
inspired to achieve more. I studied all
things that fascinated me, such as the law
of attraction, numerology, mindset, and I
recognised positive patterns every time I
focused on these subjects.
I started a business using my passion for
Muay Thai to help others become physically
fitter and mentally stronger.
As business evolved, so did I, I often feature
on radio shows, podcasts, magazines and
have expanded in the corporate world where
I talk about my mantra of all things Mindset,
Motivation and Mental Health.
I love helping people overcome their fears,
find purpose, and overcome adversity and
guiding clients to a much more positive life.
I am living proof that you can bounce back
from your biggest setbacks and want you to
know that you can too. What doesn’t break
you makes you stronger, and sometimes you
just have to have faith that everything will
work out how it’s supposed to.

Little did I know that what I was studying, I Always strive to be the best version of you.
was about to become!
This is my story; this is me

48
48 49
49
 Taking The
Easy Route
I grew up in a normal household; by normal,
I mean my father went out to work, and my
mother was the homemaker and took care
of my two brothers and me. I’m the middle
son, yes the one who’s not the eldest and not
the youngest, the one who is never the first
consideration. I say this tongue in cheek; it’s
the stereotypical middle child scenario, I never
felt I was less thought of than my brothers.
50
50
I enjoyed school, had plenty of friends, and found
something interesting in most subjects; if I had a
favourite, it would have been maths. Consequently,
when choosing subjects for my exams, I decided to
study accountancy and economics alongside maths;
numbers were definitely my thing. When I took my
exams, I gained good grades across the board, but my
top three were the ones just mentioned; I never found
them easy, but studying them was never a chore.
There comes a time when you have to start
making what seem like, big decisions.
Do I stay on at school and further my
education or do I leave and find a job? I
didn’t have a clear idea of what I wanted
to do as far as a career, only that it most
probably would involve numbers in some
way. An obvious route at the time was to
go into the financial world and get a job
in a bank; I know, how exciting you’re
thinking!
Eighteen months previously, my father
had jumped ship from his position at a
large retailer and started a retail business
of his own. He made it clear that he
wanted me to join the business, there was
a job waiting for me, at the same time
my teachers were telling me, you only get
one chance to gain an education, it was a
tough dilemma for a sixteen-year-old.
“In the end,
I took the
easiest route”
I swayed from one option to the other; I enjoyed
school, so staying on was appealing, but that would let
my father down. In the end, I took the easiest route;
I left school to join the rapidly growing family retail
business. I say easiest; in reality, it was the route of
least resistance; I wasn’t one to rock the boat; in fact I
would do everything to keep the peace.
I spent the next 30 years in that business, progressing
from bagging up potatoes to taking over the reins and
running the business. There were plenty of numbers
involved setting prices, working out margins,
controlling costs, and ensuring the bank account was
healthy.
It didn’t turn out to be an easy option; retail can be
hard work but at the same time exhilarating and
rewarding. The important thing is to be committed
and to keep learning, I may have dropped out of
school, but my education has never stopped.
Mark Terrell
thereluctantleader.academy
51
51
 out of adversity
Sometimes things happen in life that are right out of the blue. They knock you
Chris Brain
for six, disrupt your stability and make you reflect on things previously taken chrisbrainassociates.com
for granted. This story is about one of those moments.

It was August 2015. The first full day of a family holiday in Dartmouth, South
Devon. I started to experience what can only be described as black spots in
One big thing I learned during the months and years of impaired vision is that
the vision of my left eye. A phone call to NHS 101 was quickly followed by a
a visual disability is invisible. It is invisible to your employer, to people walking
recommended visit to the nearest A&E at Torbay Hospital.
towards you in the street, to those that tolerate trip hazards, to those that design
and maintain public spaces and buildings - especially colour schemes or lighting.
Within hours of arriving at A&E, I was in the operating theatre to correct a
Even those that design departure boards at railway stations and airports. I
retinal detachment in my left eye. The technical name was superotemporal mac-
discovered not everyone saw the world as I now saw it.
on retinal detachment. It is an emergency surgery to preserve sight.
When you have a visual disability, you live and operate in a different world. The
The significant, unavoidable, or frequently occurring risks were that it may not
same rules don’t apply to you, yet you have to play by those rules. We would all do
work, infection, bleeding, cataracts, further surgery – or loss of sight in that eye.
well to remember not all disabilities can be seen and how challenging it can be to
imagine walking in another person’s shoes.
I will spare the squeamish among you the detailed account of the tests, eye
injections and surgery under local anaesthetic that followed.
However, out of adversity comes learning. I learned I had the inner strength to
take a positive outlook and to keep working when things were thrown at me; to
Two days post-op laying faced down, plus five days
ask for help when I needed it; to adapt and find new ways of doing things; to keep
laying only on your right side, provided time to
perspective during times of instability and tribulations; to remember there is
reflect.
always light at the end of the darkest tunnel, and to appreciate adversity is rarely
forever. My eyesight is now better than when I was seven!
When it happened to me again in the right
eye three months later, there was more
time for reflection (and more injections
and surgery!). That was followed by yet
further reflection with cataract surgery
in both eyes the following year, plus
more eye laser treatment the year after.
It was a long and challenging time with
really poor vision.

52
52 53
53
 I realise I do have one
skill, gift, strength,
whatever it is. Whether
by nature or nurture is
debatable. But it is
positive and has been
At this point I was at my
most ill and was
probably closest to death
in 2003. I had a spell
on dialysis, which was
rubbish, but I got

Re
recognised by others through it and received
(recently by someone another kidney (one
who I would have never of my mums) at 28. 17

sil
expected to), and that is years later, my 2nd
resilience. If I were on a transplanted kidney is
Top Trump card, I’m sure working brilliantly. I’m

ien
I would be rated very very grateful for that and
badly in a fair few areas, remind myself how lucky
tidiness (ask my wife), I am pretty often. not surprising, as it comes

ce
tardiness (ask anyone),
organisational skills…the
list goes on. For all these
low scores, I would be up
there with the best in my
resilience rating.
I was born with Alport
Syndrome; this is a
genetic disease that
causes permanent
hearing loss, eyesight
issues and kidney failure.
My kidney failure was
slow and progressive. I
had my first transplant
when I was 21. It put
paid to my rugby career
as I could no longer
I have always been one to
tackle health issues head-
on, looking to fix them
or find work-arounds
where necessary. I have
never and never will see
my illness as something
to restrict me. I rattle
with medication, most of
which stop my body from
rejecting the foreign body
(my mum’s kidney) which
keeps me alive.
Mad, isn’t it? Not really –
it’s just something I have
to do, and I accept that.
Some people see illness,
particularly taking pills,
from the perception
society has of illness or
disability.
I want to inspire people
with chronic illness
to take responsibility
for their lives, achieve
what they want to
achieve, no matter
what society expects of
them. I understand the
challenges and realise we
are all individuals, but we
can take responsibility
for our own health and
not let ill-health define us
fundamentally.

E veryone has a story with good and

bad in it. Mine is no different and has
both in spades.
The goods have been great. Some of
the bads have been terrible (why do
we always remember the bad more
vividly?). We are all good at spotting our
own weaknesses, especially during bad
times, but there are always strengths
there too that everyone has.
do contact sport. A
transplanted kidney is
placed in the abdomen
and thus less protected.
I’m now a keen runner
and absolutely love it, but
that is another story.
My transplanted kidney
failed after a few years.
as somehow invalidating
their character,
destroying their image
and disempowering them.
They think it restricts
them and forces them to
live in parallel to the rest
of the ‘able’ human race.
This isn’t true. This is a
distorted view of oneself;

Richard Bennett
54
54 quadranttwoconsulting.co.uk
55
56 57
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Business Coaching
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Claxton Coaching
www.jacoblethbridge.com Elaine Mitchell
sam@createyourdestiny.co.uk Fit-Ease 1Wishfit
wellbeitcoach.com
WorkLife180 Jo Outram
www.claxtoncoaching.com
jr.lethbridge@gmail.com www.elainemitchell.co.uk fit-ease.co.uk 1wishfit.com
sarah@wellbeitcoach.com
www.worklife180.com Financial Ftness Club
claxtoncoaching@gmail.com mail@elainemitchell.co.uk stefaniegarside@yahoo.co.uk israel@1wishfit.com
07974944389
philip.horrod@gmail.com www.jooutram.com
07557 470026 07769 311823
joanne@financialfitnessclub.co.uk
Anthony Frisina Tap Your Possible Monika Mateja
Butterfly Creations Universe Of Deliciousness ramona@tapyourpossible.com www.monikamateja.com
anthonyfrisina.ca Anna Goodwin Accountancy
butterflycreations.ca UniverseOfDeliciousness.com mmateja921@gmail.com
info@anthonyfrisina.ca
Business Services julia@universeofdeliciousness.com www.annagoodwinaccountancy.co.uk
+1 905-741-2712 angela.butterflycreations@gmail.com anna@annagoodwinaccountancy.co.uk
+1 249-591-8171 07974 102049 Shape Shifters
Tracy Lowry shapeshiftersacademy.com Willow Brook Lifestyle Financial Planning
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www.TracyLowry.com Propelled By Possibility KI Leadership Institute angelamoyes@shapeshiftersacademy.com www.willowbrooklfp.co.uk
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Virtual Business Pro Premier Property Solutions G Kaur Consultancy
www.virtualbusinesspro.com premierpropertysolutions.co.im www.gkaurconsultancy.com
susan@virtualbizconnection.com
Business Services
caitrionaellis@gmail.com admin@gkaurconsultancy.com
Hynotherapy and NLP
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Stamp of Approval Leave A Better Legacy Nicola Matthews

stampofapproval.co.uk www.leaveabetterlegacy.co.uk nicolamatthews.co.uk Limitless Transformation My NLP Works Oakes-Wilson Hypnotherapy
Changemaker Central
mj_monrose@yahoo.co.uk Propelled By Possibility
haworth@eggandnest.co.uk KI Leadership Institute
hello@nicolamatthews.co.uk www.limitlesstransformationja.com www.mynlpworks.co.uk www.oakeswilsonhypnotherapy.com
www.speakerinsight.com propelledbypossibility.com www.kileadership.com nlptrainingjamaica@gmail.com markwood@mynlpworks.co.uk info@oakeswilsonhypnotherapy.com
kelly@speakerinsight.com
Peak District SEO lisafenton@live.ca
Rocket Station arthiemoore@kileadershipinstitute.com
Property Smiles
07956 887545
peakdistrictseo.co.uk (905) 447-4768
rocketstation.com 72 439 4220
www.propertysmiles.org Oxford Spires Hypnotherapy Live Your Life Hypnotherapy Tracey Cole
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www.3tcollective.com Nicola Matthews
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Trelly 01283 808046
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trailblazer360.com
robin@trailblazer360.com
www.thespeakersindex.com
Heidi McCurdy
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Networking hello@deearomarketing.com abbi@amoreantos.co.uk
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Amanda Hall Photography enquires@revivalsanctuary.co.uk
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e.wallace.info@mail.uk
60 61
 Wellbeing
Aurea Reis Donna Marie Yoga Visionary Heart
aurea.reis1@gmail.com donnamarie-yoga.com www.visionary-heart.com
visionaryheart@yahoo.com
THE BUSINESS DIRECTORY.

donnamarieyogateacher@gmail.
Gabrielle Anya Rafello com
www.gabrielleanyarafello.com YBU Coaching
gabrielle@gabrielleanyarafello.com Monika Mateja www.ybucoaching.com
www.monikamateja.com ybu_coaching@outlook.com
Origin of Energy Coaching monikahealthcoaching@gmail.
originofenergycoaching.com com The Old Fellah
lavinia@originofenergycoaching.com www.theoldfellah.co.uk
Sherell Salmon tutisltd@aol.com
Jannette Barrett linktr.ee/SCSalmon
jancancare1@gmail.com relly_s@msn.com Mel Riley Counselling
www.meljriley.co.uk
Mind Body Alignment The Mineral Spa meljriley@yahoo.co.uk
www.mindbodyalignment.co.uk www.themineralspa.com
hochgatterera@aol.com alicja.son@themineralspa.com Recovery After Abuse
recoveryafterabuse.ca
The Loss Connection Finding Felicity susan@susanball.ca
www.thelossconnection.co.uk findingfelicity.co.uk
laura.bridgingthegap@gmail.com Odelia Marvan
hello@findingfelicity.co.uk odeliamarvan@gmail.com
At Home with Ayurveda
www.athomewithayurveda.com Rita Preston
lbretherton@btconnect.com www.ritapreston.com
represt@mdvl.net

Writing
The Book Chief Bob Sanderson Gill Whitty-Collins
www.thebookchief.com bobsanderson@talk21.com www.gillwhittycollins.com
gill.whittycollins@gmail.com
Kim Lengling Author Tecassia Publishing
www.kimlenglingauthor.com www.tecassia.com
lenglingauthor@gmail.com info@tecassia.com Little Red Typewriter
www.littleredtypewriter.com
L&G Associates Caron Asgarali ellie@littleredtypewriter.com
www.landgassociates.co.uk caronrasgarali78691029
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Nicci Lou caronasgarali810@gmail.com bookbrilliancepublishing.com
niccilou.com admin@bookbrilliancepublishing.
info@niccilou.com Debora Luzi com
www.deboraluzi.com
info@deboraluzicoachingand
healing.com

62 63
 INSPIRATIONAL MAN EDITION 2021

MO2VATE
Asking for
help isn’t easy
for anyone!
Sam Ortyl shares
why he did
before the point
of no return!

Josh
DeShong
tells us how he
learned to build his
financial stability
after facing a
life of possible
homelessness

The Questions that changed my Life:

Jacob Lethbridge shares how he got
through one life altering moment.

ISSUE 11 |NOVEMBER 2021

64
T H E W IN N I N G F OR MU LA