Qualities of Good Writing

Lecture 5
Imran Chaudary
 Qualities of Good Writing:
CONCISENESS
1. Eliminate wordy expressions.
2. Include only relevant statements.
3. Avoid Unnecessary Repetition
 Qualities of Good Writing: CONCISENESS
1. Eliminate wordy expressions

Wordy Concise Wordy Concise

Along the line of About From the point of As
view of
At this time Now Have need for Need
Consensus of Consensus In due course Soon
opinion
Due to the fact that Because In many cases Often
During the time that While In order to to
Few and far Seldom In some cases Sometimes
between
For the purpose of For; to In spite of the fact Although
that
For the reason that Since; because Under the because
circumstances
 Qualities of Good Writing: CONCISENESS
1. Eliminate wordy expressions

Before:
She bought chairs that are of executive type.
After:
She bought executive-type desks.

Before
There are four rules that should be observed:
After:
Four rules should be observed:

Before:
The full details of the news can be found on page 2.
After:
The full details of the news is on page 2.
 Qualities of Good Writing: CONCISENESS
2. Include only relevant statements.
 Stick to the purpose of the message.
 Prune irrelevant words and rambling sentences.
 Omit information obvious to the reader, or don’t repeat
unnecessarily.
 Avoid long introductions, unnecessary explanations, excessive
adjectives and prepositions, pompous words, gushy politeness.
 Get to the important point tactfully and concisely.

Before:
The writer hereby wishes to extend his gratitude and appreciation
towards all those who offered unselfish assistance in his work. (wordy)

After:
I appreciate everybody’s un-conditional help in my work.
 Qualities of Good Writing: CONCISENESS
2. Include only relevant statements.

Before:
One of the primary aims of the extremely new master’s degree
program, which will offer an innovative curriculum not now available
to the area’s population, will be to draw them back into post-
graduate education to improve their communication skills. (40
words)

After:
A primary aim of the new master’s degree program, which will
offer a curriculum currently available to area residents, is to
improve communication skills. (24 words)
 Qualities of Good Writing: CONCISENESS
3. Avoid Unnecessary Repetition
 Use short name after the long one.
 Use pronouns and initials after long names.
 Cut out needless repetition.

Before:
Be sure to emphasize the important essentials.
After:
Be sure to emphasize the essentials.

Before:
We need to reach a group consensus.
After:
We need to reach a consensus.
 Qualities of Good Writing:
CONCRETENESS
1. Use specific facts and figures.
2. Put action in your verbs.
3. Choose vivid, image-building words.
 Qualities of Good Writing: CONCRETENESS
1. Use specific facts and figures

Before: These brakes stop a car within a short distance.

After: These brakes stop a 2-ton car travelling 60 miles an hour, within
240 feet.

Before: This computer reproduces campaign letters fast.

After: This computer types 400 personalized 15-word campaign letters
in one hour.

Words like these create uncertainty and misunderstanding:

a few high low more quick soon
early long many most slow tall
 Qualities of Good Writing: CONCRETENESS
2. Put action in your verbs
Strong-flavoured, active verbs give writing bounce and hold a
reader’s attention. Use active voice cause it’s more vigorous and
direct.

Before: The avalanche was caused by an explosion.

After: An explosion triggered the avalanche.
Before: These figures are checked by the research department.
After: The research department checks these figures.
Before: A full report will be sent to the newspaper by the reporter.
After: The reporter will send the full report to the newspaper.
Before: His raw speed compensated for his lack of form. His stride was
brute strength. He was aggressive in his races.
After: His raw speed obliterated the many flaws in his form. His stride
was brute strength. He attacked a race and left only scorch marks
behind.
 Qualities of Good Writing: CONCRETENESS
2. Put action in your verbs
Before: The function of this office is the collection of payments and the
compilation of statements.
After: This office collects payments and compiles statements.

Specific: The Government decided … vs. The decision was made by the …
Personal: You will note … vs. It will be noted that …
Concise: Figures show … vs. It is shown by the figures …
Emphatic: The child ran a mile. vs. A mile was run by the child.
 Qualities of Good Writing: CONCRETENESS
3. Choose vivid, image-building words
Before: There are a great many solder joints in the space craft, and each
must have just the right amount of solder.
After: The space craft has 2.5 million solder joints. If an extra drop of
solder had been left on these joints, the excess weight would have
been equivalent to the payload of the vehicle.

Before: The Metropolitan State will play a box and chaser defence against
City College.
After: The Metropolitan State will play a box and chaser defence
against City College. In this defence, four men will play a zone – they
will cover a specific area of the floor, rather than guarding a particular
man – while the fifth player will guard, or chase, City College’s star no
matter where he goes.

Before: The camera has a system that gives you good pictures.
After: The Nikon camera has a UNIQUELY precise metering system that
assures you PROPERLY exposed, true-colour picture.
 Qualities of Good Writing:
COHERENCE
1. Use parallel structures.
2. Use transitions correctly
3. Sufficient Paragraphing
 Qualities of Good Writing: COHERENCE
Some examples

Before: It took some time to choose the team. Then we developed a plan and then
finally the decision was made. All of this took six month.
After: Choosing the team, developing a plan and making the decision took us
six months. Or
To choose the team, to develop a plan and to make the decision took us six
months.

Before: The book you ordered is out of print. We are returning your check. You may
wish to contact a book search service for assistance.
After: The book you ordered is out of print. Therefore, we are returning your
check. However, You may wish to contact a book search service for
assistance. OR
The book you ordered is out of print; therefore, we are returning your check;
however, you may wish to contact a book search service for assistance.
 Qualities of Good Writing:
CORRECTNESS
1. Use the right level of language.
2. Check accuracy of facts, figures and words.
3. Maintain acceptable writing mechanics.
4. Choose non-discriminatory expressions.
 Qualities of Good Writing:
COMPLETENESS
1. Try to answer all of the prompts/aspects.
2. Check 5 W’s and 1 H.
Qualities of Good Writing

The luxurious ambiance of this exotic setting, which we

chanced upon during our desultory peregrination south
along the Amalfi Coast, is found in the guests seemed to
be on a nuptial holiday, whether the first or the 25th. The
place had a number of luminaries who were not at all
condescending. Among the distinguished guests was a
producer with his entourage, who came in from their
palatial yacht and dined at the hotel…
Qualities of Good Writing
Hey man! Those guys at Saint Pizza’s do things right. People from all
over the places. A lot of them on their honeymoon. We had a
bleeping good time, I’ll tell you that. Some of them thought they
were bleeping famous, but they didn’t bother us. Some guy had this
big bleeping yacht out there and came in with his buddies to eat.
Couple of Hollywood broads. One didn’t come out while we were
there. Scared I’d probably bleep her. Bleep, man, you should’ve
been with us.
Qualities of Good Writing
All the guests at San Pietro seemed to be on honeymoons, whether
first, second, or 25th. The crowd – primarily Italian, British, German,
and American – was sophisticated and decidedly unsnobbish. There
were even a few celebrities on view. A famous producer, his wife
and friends stopped by for dinner while their chartered yacht lay
anchored in the harbor. Two well-know actors arrived the day we
left. Another star was there but, for some reasons, stayed in her
room most of the time. Nobody asked for autographs-probably too
busy having their own good time. Pamela Fiori/Travel and Leisure.