No.

10 “Make a story that follows from the beginning sentence,

adding about 60 words.

Last Sunday, when I was reading a book at home, suddenly there

was a knock on the door.”

NO. 10 ESSAY
Last Sunday, when I was reading a book at home, suddenly there was a knock on the door.

I opened the door, feeling strange. Then, it was my girlfriend “Yui” that was standing in

front of the entrance. That day was my birthday. She embraced me as soon as she found

who I was. because of a happening, my heart almost stopped beating. However, I thought

that day was one of days which I will never forget in a life.
1st sentence:

Last Sunday, when I was reading a book at home, suddenly there was a
knock on the door.

Corrections:

NONE

2nd sentence:

I opened the door, feeling strange.

Corrections:

I —> When I

feeling —> I felt

When I opened the door, I felt strange.
3rd sentence:

Then, it was my girlfriend “Yui” that was standing in front of the

entrance.

Corrections:

“ “ —> omit

that —> who

Then, it was my girlfriend Yui that was standing in front of

the entrance.
4th sentence:

That day was my birthday.

Correction:

None
5th sentence:

She embraced me as soon as she found who I was.

Corrections:

she found who I was —> she saw me

She embraced me as soon as she saw me.
6th sentence:

because of a happening, my heart almost stopped beating.

Corrections:

because —> Because

a happening —> what happened

Almost stopped beating —> skipped a beat

Because of what happened, my heart skipped
a beat.
7th sentence:

However, I thought that day was one of days which I will never forget
in a life.

Corrections:

However, —> omit

of —> of the

which —> that

a —> my

I thought that day was one of the days that

I will never forget in my life.
 No. 10 essay

Last Sunday, when I was reading a book at home, suddenly there was a
knock on the door. When I opened the door, I felt strange. Then, it was
my girlfriend Yui that was standing in front of the entrance. That day was
my birthday. She embraced me as soon as she saw me. Because of what
happened, my heart skipped a beat. I thought that day was one of the
days which I will never forget in my life.