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Makayla Campbell

Professor Riley

English Composition 1201.1V3

3/20/22

Human Response

Why is it that we automatically click with some people and automatically

dislike others? How do interpersonal relationships influence how we view others as

well as ourselves? This is the question that is driving my research topic. This idea

stemmed from a conversation with my boyfriend and the relationship area in one of

the idea posts in week 7. I am sure everyone has had at least one person that they

automatically dislike or people that they just click with right off the bat. That is the

thing that I want to investigate in my research topic. Why does that happen? Is it our

intuition, our gut feeling, or just a response to behavior right off the bat? How do

these relationships affect how we view the world?

My first source is called “Adolescents' interpersonal relationships, self-

consistency, and congruence: Life meaning as a mediator” written by Jinhui and

Xiaoting Ye. This source talks about their study on adolescents’ and the things they

found in relation to interpersonal relationships. In their study, they had two

hypotheses, both relating to how adolescent relationships with themselves, and

others affect the way they see the world and the meaning of life. After they had their
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participants (900 adolescents and young adults) take three questionnaire tests on

topics pertaining to the study, their hypothesis turned out to be supported.

“Individuals with higher self-consistency and congruence were more likely to have

better interpersonal relationships and higher life meaning.” This article has many

cited sources used throughout the piece, but it all leads back to their main point,

that the fact that the relationships we have with ourselves, and others are the thing

that brings us closer to our purpose and pushes us to have a higher life meaning.

My second source is called “Five Reasons We Click with Someone Right from

the Start” by Suzanne Degges-White. In her article, she goes over the five main

reasons we are drawn to specific people right off the bat, even between unlikely

people. The first of the five sections is vulnerability. Vulnerability is a key factor

simply because it is how connection is first made, letting your guard down enough to

reach out to the other person is the first crucial step. Proximity is the second one,

sharing the same space as the other person is a good reason to seek out that bond

in the first place, knowing someone is going to be around is a good base to

friendship. Her third reason is resonance. Have you ever had a conversation with

someone, and you just know they are on the same page as you? Or when you are

about to do something and then another person says they are going to do that thing

and you just look at them like “we are the same.” Feeling like someone truly

understands you is the basis for an amazing bond. Similarity is another factor.
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Coming from the same place, disliking the same people, loving the same things,

these are all things that put people on common ground and make them easier to

bond with. Having someone who is like you in a way is a comforting feeling that

people crave, knowing that someone has that connection as well can be a wonderful

way to cultivate friendships. The last reason Degges-White gives is the

environment. What she means by that is a place in which you are going through

something together, even if it is not by choice. Things like being partnered in a

cooking class or being stranded somewhere together are examples of how vast that

reason could be.

My third source used was “HUMAN NEEDS PSYCHOLOGY AND RELATIONSHIP”

put together by the YouTube channel Positive Revolution. The name of the film is

“The Fabric of Relationships” and it goes deeper into the psychology of the

relationships we have with each other. Most of the information given in the film is

based on the book “The Six Human Needs” by Tony Robbins but also features 20

coaches and leaders on successful living and relationships. The quality of our

relationships with others directly affects the quality of our lives. Understanding and

loving ourselves and the people around us is how we build on our strengths to push

us to greater understanding of the things that are important to us. The main

takeaway from this film is that we must love ourselves to constructively love others.
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My fourth source is called “Hate at first sight: Why you dislike certain people

right away” by Joseph Lamour. Lamour interviewed Jessy Warner-Cohen, a

psychologist and professor of psychology. In this article, Lamour partners with

Warner-Cohen to paint us a picture of exactly what happens when we make a split-

second decision about someone. The amygdala, posterior cingulate cortex, and

dorsomedial prefrontal cortex, come together as your emotions, memories, and

decision-making in around a tenth of a second to produce a first impression of

someone. Unfortunately, while sometimes it can be spot on, we base these

impressions from past experiences with others, taking in their physical traits and the

first few things they say or do as the things to base our feelings on.

My fifth source is called “Social Psychology: The Interplay between Sociology

and Psychology” by Peggy Thoits. In this article, Thoits talks about the

commonalities between sociology and psychology and how they come together to

research social psychology. She talks about interpersonal relations and how the

“three sociological approaches in methods and perspectives, in their own ways and

for their own purposes, examine the consequences of social status, roles, and/or

social contexts for individuals' thoughts, feelings, or behaviors.” She then goes in to

talk about the specific categories they investigated and how they had an impact on

their research.
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There are many answers to my research question but most of them circle back

to past experiences and how we view the people around us. The more we value the

way we see ourselves and others, the more interpersonal relationships we cultivate

to try and get closer to what we feel our purpose is. Understanding why we like, and

dislike people is essential in understanding ourselves and how we want to perceive

and be perceived.

Works Cited:

Ye, Jinhui & Xiaoting. “Adolescents' Interpersonal Relationships, Self-Consistency,

and Congruence: Life Meaning as a Mediator.” Shibboleth Authentication

Request, Scientific Journal Publishers, Ltd., Nov. 2020, https://go-gale-

com.sinclair.ohionet.org/ps/retrieve.do?

tabID=Journals&resultListType=RESULT_LIST&searchResultsType

=MultiTab&hitCount=14636&searchType=BasicSearchForm¤tPosi

tion=1&docId=GALE

%7CA642902930&docType=Report&sort=Relevance&conten

tSegment=ZXAY-

MOD1&prodId=OVIC&pageNum=1&contentSet=GALE

%7CA642902930&searchId=R4&userGroupName=dayt30401&amp

;inPS=true.
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“Five Reasons We Click with Someone Right from the Start.” Psychology Today,

Sussex Publishers, https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/lifetime-

connections/201907/five-reasons-we-click-someone-right-the-start?amp.

positive611. “Human Needs Psychology and Relationship (Full Length Documentary

Film 2021).” YouTube, YouTube, 11 Apr. 2018,

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hI90-r-24E4.

Lamour, Joseph. “Hate at First Sight: Why You Dislike Certain People Right Away.”

Mic, Mic, 26 July 2021, https://www.mic.com/life/why-you-instantly-dislike-

certain-people-48300978/amp.

Thoits , Peggy. “Social Psychology: the Interplay between Sociology and

Psychology.” Shibboleth Authentication Request, Oxford University Press,

1995, https://go-gale-com.sinclair.ohionet.org/ps/retrieve.do?

tabID=Journals&resultListType=RESULT_LIST&searchResultsType

=SingleTab&hitCount=14636&searchType=BasicSearchForm¤tPos

ition=16&docId=GALE

%7CA17295823&docType=Article&sort=Relevance&contentS

egment=ZXAY-

MOD1&prodId=OVIC&pageNum=1&contentSet=GALE

%7CA17295823&searchId=R5&userGroupName=dayt30401&in

PS=true.
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