Unboxing Masculinity

 
Guest sign
While guests sign in and get pizza, packets will be distributed to guests.

Introduction    
Introduce myself and the guest speakers
Dr. Steve Wilson  

Audience Knowledge – Jared Bryant

Pre-survey

Activity One: “Act Like a Man” Box  - Dr. Steve Wilson

Time: 45 minutes
Play: A call to men | Tony Porter - TedTalk 
Directions:
1. Ask: Has anyone ever been told or heard someone being told to “act like a man”.
2. Please turn to page number [to be determined] with the box Titled “Act Like a Man”
Box.
3. Ask:
a. What does it mean to “act like a man” – what are the expectations (which may not
be the reality).
b. How are men supposed to be different from women? – stronger, tougher, in
control
c. What feelings is a “real man” supposed to have? – anger, superiority, confidence
d. How do “real men” express their feelings? – yelling, fighting, silence
e. How are “real men” supposed to act sexually? – aggressive, dominant, with
women
4. Ask: What are names applied to persons outside the box? (write these outside the box and
around the box)
5. Ask: What things happen physically to people outside the box? (write these outside the
box and around the box)
Debrief 
Ask:
1. How do the stereotypes listed from the boxes relate to stereotypes for straight and queer
people? Where do the items listed outside of the box show up? Think about – in everyday
conversation, in private, in media, etc.?
2. What do you notice about the influence of male stereotypes on sexism? Heterosexism?
Transphobia? How might the characteristics listed inside of the box impact the perception
of men as a whole?
3. What is the implication of the names that men get called?
4. How many men here are in the box all the time?
5. What should a “man” do if he gets called these names? Would that put him back inside
the box?
6. If a man stays inside the box, does he generally avoid getting called names and harassed?
 7. How do we change these societal expectations?
Key points
 These are expectations by society have been perpetuated by years and years of thinking
passed down through generations and not realistic.
 Men that stay inside the box are generally (that not always) safe from the harassment that
occurs outside the box.
 Men who leave the box are accused of being feminine or less-than, often being called
“weak,” “gay,” or “women.”
 Men who accused of being outside the box could retaliate in an aggressive fashion and
then put themselves back into the box.

Next Guest Speaker: What does coming out of the box mean? How does that look?

Activity Two:  Real Man vs Good Man - Jared Bryant

Time: 45 minutes
Directions: 
Please turn to page numbers [to be determined] with the boxes titled “Good Man” and “Real
Man”
Ask: What does it mean to be a “good man”?
1. What qualities do the men you respect and admire have?
2. What values and morals do they live by?
3. What kinds of things do they say and do?
Ask: What does it mean to be a “real man”?
1. What do people mean when they say “be a man” or “man up”?
2. What qualities are “real men” assumed to have?
3. How are they expected to act?
4. How are they not supposed to behave?  
Debrief 
Ask:
 What do you notice? What do you wonder?
 Are what it means to be a “good” man and a “real” man mostly similar or mostly
different? Why do you think this is?
 What conclusions can you draw in comparing the lists?
 How do you think these cultural messages affect boys and men? How might they affect
girls and women?
Key Points
 Most times we think of good men as people we look up to and admire – father figures;
but when it comes to real men, we think of hypermasculine men – pro-athletes,
presidents, etc.
 Those who fit the good men model fit outside the man box, while those who fit the model
of real men fit inside the man box.
 Masculinity has changed over time, yet we still see good men and real men differently.
 Those good men are seen to have good traits, like respect, compassion, the embodiment
of trustworthiness. The real men are seen to have traits, like power, strength, and
leadership.
Questions for the speakers  
This will be short amount of time. We will open the floor for questions from the audience
members about anything that was discussed at the event.

Wrap Up – Letter Writing – Jared Bryant

Directions: 
Students will be given a piece of paper and an envelope. 
Ask students to write a letter to a younger boy they know, to themselves at a younger age, to a
fictional character, or to an imaginary boy or young man.
Ask:
 What would you say to help, advise, encourage, influence, or warn them, based on what
you know about your life, and why?
 What stories or wisdom will you impart?  

Closing Remarks
Thank you all for coming and we hope you take away some valuable lessons surrounding
masculinity. Please fill out the post survey handed to you. Have a wonderful rest of your night!