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Families in Transition

Danielle Sarno

MFCC/567

August 10, 2021

Beverly Pruitt
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Families in Transition

Counseling a couple in a marriage where infidelity occurs can be a sensitive circumstance

and treatment specific to the individuals is required (Fife et al., 2008). The seven year marriage

of Marla and Peter is currently being tested by Marla’s recent affair, and she and Peter have been

separated for two months. The couple cares about each other and would be willing to attend

therapy together to decide if recovery of the marriage is possible. Additionally, they would like

to set up sessions with their children, Kevin, age four, and Jared, age six, to determine the effects

the separation is having on them.

The following analysis will include counseling considerations for the couple and the

children. Additionally, the effects this situation is having on the family, and therapeutic

techniques that will serve this family during this transition will be discussed.

Since infidelity is one of the most difficult obstacles to overcome during a marriage, the

initial period of crisis should be handled appropriately by the therapist. The couple should be

given the time to ease the feelings of panic so the current state of the relationship can stabilize.

Feelings of shock, anger, and denial from both partners should be addressed before the treatment

interventions have an opportunity to be effective (Fife et al., 2008). The betrayed partner could

experience grief over the infidelity, and they might also be experiencing suicidal ideation. Both

of these symptoms should be addressed before concentrating on affair recovery (Fife et al.,

2008). A consideration for Marla and Peter might be to attend individual sessions with another

therapist to mitigate these issues before beginning the process of deciding to continue with their

marriage or end the marriage with a divorce. Additionally, Marla should investigate her feelings

about the affair to make sure that the affair is over, and be certain she wants to move forward

with her husband.

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Many individuals enter therapy unsure of the chances their marriage can be repaired.

Rebuilding a marriage will only work if the people involved in the relationship decide they are

committed to working on restoration. When in couples therapy, Marla and Peter should

determine their desires for repairing the marriage based on Marla’s affair, but they should both

be humble and willing to address all of the factors in the marriage that contributed to the

infidelity.

The therapist should address the issue of reconnection for the couple to rebuild trust,

encourage forgiveness, and confront the sexual issues that will be roadblocks for recovery.

Determination and patience are required by both people in the relationship because of significant

emotional and psychological effects of infidelity (Wilkinson et al., 2012). Peter is not directly

responsible for Marla’s affair, but he should take responsibility for the problems in their

marriage that caused the affair and be a team in the healing of their relationship (Fife et al.,

2008). Peter’s inability to get a job might have caused stress to the intimacy of his and Marla’s

relationship, and she may have felt drawn away from the marriage as a result. The most

important consideration is whether or not Peter can forgive Marla for being unfaithful so they

can move forward with reconciling their marriage.

While divorce is a consequence of the infidelity, Peter and Marla may not know for sure

until they have experienced therapy and all of the work that is required. Whether or not they put

the effort into attempting to repair their marriage, divorce is possible even after their therapy has

concluded (Wilkinson et al., 2012). In Peter and Marla’s case, even though a divorce could be

the result, it should be investigated as to whether she had the affair due to an estrangement

between her and Peter to benefit therapy (Wilkinson et al., 2012).

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The effects of the circumstances of Marla’s infidelity reflect on the entire family. The

marriage is damaged and they should utilize the therapeutic process to work through their own

issues as a married couple, but they also should address the needs of their children. Kevin and

Jared are more than likely confused by the separation and the fact that they are no longer living

in one household. Even though Peter and Marla have shared custody, they children are not used

to living in two households. Meeting with the therapist as a family is important to the children’s

well-being during this difficult transition and should be considered critical in the children’s

developmental process (Fife et al., 2008).

Treatment techniques and interventions should be chosen to complement Peter, Marla as

a couple, and then additionally including their children Jared and Kevin. An intersystems model

is appropriate for treating couples who have been affected by infidelity because of the systemic

focus, contextual sensitivity, flexibility, and integration of other interventions and therapy

models (Fife et al., 2008). Couples are best assisted through infidelity issues by combining

various interventions (Wilkinson et al., 2012). Since infidelity is considered a relationship issue,

a systemic perspective opens up the process of healing by allowing participation from both

individuals; partners go through the suffering together and should therefore repair the betrayal

together (Fife et al., 2008). The intersystems model is growth-oriented to assist couples in

working with the relationship from where it is at the moment the couple begins therapy.

Rebuilding a marriage after infidelity comes with emotional swings from both partners and a

systemic method provides support in assessing the relationship issues and any individual issues

that may have caused the infidelity primarily, helps with encouraging forgiveness, and

strengthening communication between the couple to develop greater intimacy (Fife et al., 2008).
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Conclusion

When treating couples in a marriage that are seeking assistance with infidelity, the

therapist should conceptualize the circumstances and be sensitive to the requirements of the

family and their needs (Reiter, 2013). Peter and Marla need help with their marriage and require

a therapist that can be aligned with their values to ensure success with treatment and

interventions (Fife et al., 2008).

The following analysis included counseling considerations for the couple and the

children, and the effects this situation is having on the family. Additionally, therapeutic

techniques that are the most beneficial for this family during this transition were explained.
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References

Fife, S. T., Weeks, G. R., & Gambescia, N. (2008). Treating Infidelity: An Integrative Approach.

The Family Journal, 16(4), 316–323. https://doi.org/10.1177/1066480708323205

Reiter, Michael D. (2013). Case Conceptualization in Family Therapy, (1st ed.). Upper Saddle

River, NJ: Pearson Education, Inc.

Wilkinson, R. T., Littlebear, S., & Reed, S. (2012). A Review of Treatment With Couples Post-

Affair: An Emphasis on the Use of Disclosure. The Family Journal, 20(2), 140–146.

https://doi.org/10.1177/1066480712442051