To: Nancy Myers

From: Joseph Persyn

Date: April 18, 2022
Subject: Chapter 5 – Achieving Audience Involvement

ACHIEVING AUDIENCE INVOLVEMENT

1. Revise the following by adding pronouns and names.
a. The company will require further information before processing this request.
John, we will ask you to provide the new scheduling information before processing your request.

b. It has been decided that a new procedure must be implemented to avoid further mechanical
failures.
Nancy, we will be implementing a new procedure, on 4/18/2022, to avoid further mechanical
failures.

c. The department supervisor wants to extend heartfelt thanks for the fine efforts expanded.
Thank you for the tremendous effort, it is widely appreciated. Bill H.

d. I think you have done a great job. I want you to know that you have surpassed this month’s
quota by 12 percent. I believe I can speak for the entire department by saying thank you.
Bill, your coworkers and myself appreciate your excellent work, surpassing the quota, this
month.

e. If the computer overloads, simultaneously press Reset and Control. Wait for the screen
command. If it reads “Data Recovered,” continue operations. If it reads “I/O Error” call the
computer resource center.
John, Jason, and Will, if your computer overloads, Press Reset and Control. You can continue if it
reads “Data Recovery”. Please call our computer resource center if it reads “I/O Error”.

2. Revise the following using positive words and pronouns.

a. We cannot lay your cable until you sign the attached wavier.
Once you have signed the attached waiver, we will lay your cable.

b. John, don’t purchase the wrong program. If we continue to keep inefficient records, our
customers will continue to complain.
John, To achieve efficient records, and assist with customer satisfaction, will you review and
purchase the best program.
c. You have not paid your bill yet. Failure to do so might result in termination of services.
Bob, please contact us to coordinate a payment on your outstanding balance, so we can
continue your service.

d. If you incorrectly quote and paraphrase, you will receive an F on the assignment.
I recommend, that you paraphrase and quote correctly to achieve a positive grade.

e. Your team has lost 6 of their last 12 games.

We have won 6 of our games.