165 SANDTRAY Rn Pan THERAPY DIRECTIVES one Build a tray about... For school-age children: | For teenagers: BB Your family BI Atimetine of your life I Your friends at schoo! I Your happiest memory I Your typical day I The hurdles you face now Ill One side being the best part of your world/other IB Three things you like about you side being the worst part of your world IH One side as when you feel happy/other side when I ot ideal kur you feel sad I Your funeral Il Your favorite things ee Ii The most important things in your life IE Marriage/commitment Ill The scariest thing in your world IB How you calm down when you are feeling upset Hil Wat each of member of your family does most often I One thing you would change in your life if you could IE What you want to do when you grow up I Your dally routine I Your siblings | TEE Your friends as animais I Your favorite day at schoo! | BB Hurts Anger Ill How you fee! when you walk into school Il What you see when you look in the miror Ill What you want to be when you are an adult IE Your worst nightmare (ether imagined or an actual dream) What it means t I Wat being an act means to you Hi What you think success looks tke I Your biggest heartbreak happy looks lil Il What happy looks ke Il The person you look up to the most happy feels | eee BB yiet is otter peope’s fautvivnat fs your faut BB A perfect family (one side of the tray for each) Hil Acre of those who most influence you I Three things you want to focus on in therapy Ill Your Grandparents I You 5 Favorite things IB Your parents/stepparents For couples: BB Love IB Your marriage in the last 2 weeks/first 2 weeks I Your best friend BB rat you need from your partner to heal Tl Anger I Your favorite/least thing about your partner I Your best memory with your family IB wnat your partner would say about you when asked his/her favorite and least thing about you165 SANDTRAY THERAPY DIRECTIVES Build a tray about... For couples: IB 8 ways you show love to your partner IB Your view of money vs your partners view of money Il Your partner at the beginning of the marriage vs currently using only animals, I Exch partner's shame reaction, such as lashing out orerying lL Tre best way you both make up after fight Ill Each person in the couple builds what his or her marriage feels like for them [Bl Their frst date THI What the other person would say they need to change (3 things), such as make a tray about what your partner would say you need to change IB tun day inthe past IE Your empty nest Il Reticement If you could build a time capsule for your a relationship, what would go in it? Ii Your biggest hurt from the relationship IB Hurdles you need to overcome for the relationship. to be happier Ill What you ike best about your partner I Each partner makes a tray about what they each like to do and then the couple brings those things together and makes a tray together about what they would be willing to do with the other person or shared interests Ill Your famiy- ether nuclear or extended Il How each partner likes be shown care or love For adults: [Bi Your hope for the outcome of therapy I Your one biggest struggle I The phrase “Before | die, | want to...” Il Your biggest trigger for anger OUTHERN NDTRAY Pan Pre eee) I Concerns about therapy I Your earliest recollection BE what it looks like when you're angry. BE Your worst day TI Wat it would look like if you won the lottery I How the world sees you [I What money gets you in your life IB Unanswered questions BB Your dream world BB Your life journey BB Your family tree I Your three biggest wishes I Three things you want to focus on in therapy I Your goals of therapy I Your happiest childhood memory IB Your saddest childhood memory (could combine this with the happiest childhood memory) I wnat shame means for you BB Your fears El The purpose of life BB Alyour hopes IB How you want the world to see you I wnat change feels lke to you I About your home I Your first day in therapy I Your Feith journey I wrat keeps you up at night I what energizes you I Your Favorite dream I Who/what you love most BB Your earliest memory165 SANDTRAY THERAPY DIRECTIVES Build a tray about... For adults: IB What your do for Setf-care I Your needs IB Fit time you used drugs HI who's in your support group Il Ifyou had chosen a different path what would it hhad looked like Ill What it feet ike to feel shame II How others can show you love IE Your family 2s animals inthe tray II what you feels impossible in your life IE What would take to stand up for yourself [Bl The best day possible IE You family kids, husband, parents, etc) Hil Wat you would want to do if today was your last day alive IB Your thoughts as your feet hit the floor inthe morning IE Your motto for your ite Ill Thee things you can do tomorrow to fee better IE what your mom/dad would say about you if they were to make a tray about you IB Your best worst attribute or characteristic I 5 things you tel yourself every day i | How your life would be different if ____ was ‘not in your lifeyheart (i.e. depression, divorce, hatred, eto) I Your feelings as you lay in bed at night IB Your favorite part of life IB Your feelings in a typical day at work Bl Your biggest wish I Your Grief journey I Your proudest/least proud moment OUTHERN NDTRAY Pan Pre eee) BB Your romantic relationships (past or current) I Your parents and grandparents. Choose a iniature to represent each and then a miniature {0 represent their relationship with each other (Similar to a genogram) I Your funeral (encourage client to give voice to the miniatures) IB The time line of your life What goes through your mind when you are : ‘wanting X (cigarette, pills, food etc) Il What causes you to wake up sweating at night with panic Hl Tiree coping skis you often use Three positive self-statements/three negative i eg self-statements (on each side) II What sacness fee's tke in your body IH Your ines conmuniy, Tose voices you hear throug oe: your day from your past, either good orbad. Ill Your biggest challenge at work What superhero you would likely be- what a superpowers do they have? I The feeling of longing HI Your worst fear I Your biggest pet peeve IB Your best’worst quality (each side for one) I Wren you fee! the most loved Bi Aloneness: Ty Wat tt feels tke when your parents fight I How it feels when your friends leave you out I One thing you can do differently in your life to make it better BB cuit i Shame BB What makes you smile Il When you fee! most connected to others