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Notes 7. Express my needs and wants.

8. Make mistakes (and be responsible for them).

9. Choose not assert myself in any situation. (In some cases, it may be better to
choose to be non-assertive).

10. Make my own decisions.

Non-verbal aspects of submissive, assertive and aggressive behaviour:

Submissive Aggressive Assertive

a. Voice Sometimes wobbly, Very firm, Steady and firm,

Tone may be sing
Song or whining Tone is sarcastic, Tone is middle

Over-soft or over-warm Sometimes cold, range, rich and warm

Often dull in monotone, Hard and Sharp, Sincere and clear,
Strident, often Not too loud or quiet,

Quiet, often drops away Shouting, often Not too loud or quiet,
at end. shouting, rises at end.

b. Speech Pattern Hesitant and filled with Fluent, awkward Fluent, few awkward
pauses, hesitance hesitance’s.

Sometimes jerks from Often abrupt, clipped Emphasises key words

fast to slow,

Frequent throat cleaning. Emphasises blaming Steady, even, pace

words.
Often fast,

c. Facial Expression Unreal smile when Smile may become Smiles, when pleased
expressing anger, or ‘wry
being criticised.

Eyebrows raised in Scowls, when angry. Frowns, when angry.

anticipation (e.g., of
rebuke)

Quick-changing features. Eyebrows raised in Otherwise ‘open’

amazement/disbelief
Jaw set firm Features

Chin thrust forward. Steady, not wobbling,

Jaw relaxed, but not
‘loose’.

d. Eye Contacts Evasive Tries to stare down Firm but not a ‘stare-
and dominate. down’.

Looking down

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e. Body Movements Hand-wringing. Finger thumping. Open hand movements Notes

(inviting to speak)

Hunching shoulders, First thumping,

Stepping back, Sits upright or leans ‘Measured pace’
forward hand movements’

Covering mouth with Stands upright head Sits upright or relaxed

hand ‘in air’ (not slouching or cowering),

Nervous movements Strides around Stands with head held

which detract (shrugs (impatiently) straight.
and shuffles)

Arms crossed for Arms crossed

protection. (unapproachable)

The following exercise will assist you in identifying your preferred behaviour
mode when you want something. Think about each of the following situations one
at a time. How would you typically handle it? Would your approach be non-assertive
(in other words, you wouldn’t do anything about it), aggressive, passive- aggressive,
manipulative- or would you respond assertively? Note the style you’d use after each
situation. If you have fewer than 25 out of 30 “assertive” responses, it would be useful
for you to work on your assertiveness:

1. You’re being kept on the phone by a salesperson who is trying to sell you
something you don’t want.

2. You would like to break off a relationship that is no longer working for you.

3. You’re sitting in a movie and the people behind you are talking.

4. Your doctor keeps you waiting more than 20 minutes.

5. Some family member has the stereo on too loud.

6. Your next door neighbour has the stereo on too loud.

7. You would like to return something to the store and get a refund.

8. You’re standing in a line and someone moves in front of you.

9. Your friend has not returned the money he took from you a long time back.

10. You receive a bill that seems unusually high for the service you received.

11. Your home repair person is demanding payment, but has done unsatisfactory
work.

12. You find that the food at a restaurant is over- or undercooked.

13. You would like to ask a major favour of your partner or spouse.

14. You would like to ask a major favour of your friend.

15. Your friend asks you a favour which you don’t feel like doing.
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Notes 16. Your son/ daughter/ spouse/ roommate is not doing his or her fair share of the
work around the house.

17. You would like to ask a question, but are concerned that someone else might
think it’s silly.

18. You’re in a group and would like to speak up, but you don’t know how your
opinion will be received.

19. You would like to strike up a conversation at a gathering, but you don’t know
anyone.

20. You’re sitting/ standing next to someone smoking and the smoke is beginning to
bother you.

21. You find your partner/ spouse’s behaviour unacceptable.

22. You find your friend’s behaviour unacceptable.

23. Your friend drops by unexpectedly just before you were about to leave for some
urgent work.

24. You’re talking to someone about something important, but he or she does not
seem to be listening.

25. Your friend calls you for lunch when you one extremely busy.

26. You return an item you don’t want from the department store and request a
refund. The clerk diverts your request and offers to exchange the item for
another.

27. You’re speaking and someone interrupts you.

28. Your phone rings but you don’t feel like taking the call.

29. Your partner or spouse “talks down” to you as if you were a child.

30. You are unfairly criticised by someone.

Obstacles to Assertiveness
Obstacle # 1: Low Self-Esteem

Self-concept (your mental image of yourself) builds self-esteem (self-respect),

which determines your behaviour. Negative thinking and actions may limit your
opportunities.

Obstacle # 2: Inability to Handle Conflict

People who fear conflict avoid asserting themselves in stressful situations.

Do not mistake aggressive behaviour for assertive behaviour-aggressive behaviour

causes conflict.

Obstacle # 3: Poor Communication Skills

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Your inability to respond in various situations leads to negative emotions, thoughts, Notes
and anxiety.

By understanding these “traps” to being assertive, you can avoid them, thus setting
an environment, which is conducive to assertiveness.

6.5 Handling Conflicts

Different Behaviour Styles for Handling Conflict

If you are not using assertive behaviour in situations where you have to deal with
confrontation or disagreement, you may be choosing another behaviour aggressive or
nonassertive. How do these behaviors address conflict?

Assertive Behaviour
The person with this type of behaviour:

• Brings Conflict into the open where the communication process can continue.

• Is interested in a “win-win” situation: understands that it’s ok to get angry, but in

a factful manner.

• Tries to negotiable to solve problems in an environment of mutual respect.

• Recognises personal rights while respecting the rights of others.

• Uses statements such as, “This is how I see it,” “This is how I feel,” or “This is
what I think,”

Aggressive Behaviour
One who displays such a behaviour:

• Becomes defensive.

• Discounts feelings of others; assumes an “I’ am right” position.

• Is interested in a “win” situation at the expense of the relationship.

• Uses anger to control.

• Tries to manipulate.

• Uses statements such as, “The meeting is at 2 p.m.; I don’t care what you have
on your schedule; just be here”.

Submissive Behavior
One exhibiting such a behaviour:

• Gives in to others’ expectations and viewpoints to avoid conflict.

• Assumes a, “You’re right” position’. Does not see personal feelings as

important.

• Will end up a “lose” situation.

• Is easily manipulated by an aggressive person.

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Notes • Does not openly show anger.

• Uses statements such as, “How can I possibly know the answer to that?

For most people, the three behaviour types are seen in the following terms.

1. Assertive Behaviour
A person with such a behaviour is direct, firm, honest, tactful’, makes things
happen, maintains self-respect and gains respect from others’. Is confident, positive.

2. Aggressive Behaviour
One who projects such a behavour is domineering, forceful, bold; makes things
happen regardless of how others feel or think; mean, uncaring, forward, pushy, and
belligerent.

3. Submissive Behaviour
A person with this type of behaviour is soft-hearted, modest, hesitant, insecure,
withdrawn; withdrawn; waits to make things happen; loses self-respect, because things
never quite happen according to plan.

Advantages of Assertive Behaviour

These includes:

• Close working relationships

Assertion tends to breed assertion, so people work more happily with us than against
us. We are then, with their help, more likely to achieve our objectives in a conflict
situation.

• Greater confidence in oneself

We develop a strong regard for ourselves and a high level of self-esteem,

reducing the chance of boastfulness (aggression) and hopelessness
(submission).

• Greater confidence in others

We have a healthy recognition of the capabilities and limitations of others as

opposed to seeing them as inferior (aggression) or superior (submission).

• Increased self responsibility

We take responsibility for ourselves, or wants, opinions, needs, etc. rather than
blaming others (aggression) or excusing ourselves (submission).

• Increased Self Control

We can channel our thoughts and feelings to produce the behaviour we want,
rather than being controlled by outside events or people, on inner emotions.

• Savings in time and energy

We can take decisions more swiftly based on their individual merit and save
time when handling disputes. A lot of time and energy is wasted on worrying and
scheming. If we are not worried about upsetting people (submission) or scheming
how not to miss out (aggression), we can save ourselves a lot of stress.
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• An increased chance of everyone winning Notes

Assertiveness increases the likelihood that all parties will see their needs met
their ideas and opinions heard and considered and their abilities put to good
use.

Assertive Behaviour is only healthy behaviour to make adjustments in our

personal, social and professional lives. It helps an individual to achieve
personal and professional effectiveness.

“When you are assertive you respect yourself and others”

Questions and Exercises

1. What do you understand by ‘Behavioural Adjustment’? Is it important at the work
place? Explain.

2. Differentiate between adjustment and maladjustment. Give symptoms of

maladjustment.

3. Explain the role of self awareness in the improvement of adjustment.

4. What are the different behavioural styles to handle conflicts?.

5. “Assertive Behaviour builds positive and healthy Interpersonal relationship”

Comment

Further Readings
1 Behavioural Science by Barbara Fadem

2 Behavioural Science: Concepts and Management Application by Harold M. Rush

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Unit-7 Stress Management

Notes
Stucture
7.1 Defining Stress
7.2 Types of Stress
7.3 The Stress Process
7.4 Common Symptoms of Stress
7.5 Occupational Stress
7.6 Causes of Stress
7.7 Indicative Behaviour
7.8 Check your Progress
7.9 Questions and Exercises
7.10 Further Readings

Objects
After going through this chapter, you will understand:
1. What is meant by Stress
2. The process of Stress
3. Understanding the various symptoms of stress

Introduction
“Manage your stress, if not, stress will manage you”

Stress symptoms include mental, social, and physical manifestations. These

include exhaustion, loss of/increased appetite, headaches, crying, sleeplessness, and
oversleeping. Escape through alcohol, drugs, or other compulsive behavior are often
indications. Feelings of alarm, frustration, or apathy may accompany stress.

7.1 Definition of Stress

“Stress is not a reaction. Rather it is the price we pay for the “civilised” life we live
which by the way is not civilised at all” ~ Yovko Bonev

The word “stress” is derived from the Latin word stringer, which means “to draw
tight” (Cox 1978). It is such an overused and elusive term that many agree it should
be completely abandoned. Many definitions exist: some believe stress can and
should be subjectively defined. Others feel one needs an objective definition. Some
researchers believe a global definition is appropriate; others emphasise that stress is
multidimensional.

In the nineteenth century, the pursuit and maintenance of a constant internal state was
seen as the essence of “free and independent life”. Research sought to identify those
adaptive changes responsible for steady state maintenance. This motivation towards
equilibrium was called “homeostasis”, from the Greek words homoios meaning similar,
and stasis meaning state. Stress was considered to be a threat to homeostasis (“a
rocking of the boat”), but this usage of the term was subject to change and imprecision.

The vacillation between trying to understand stress as a stimulus and/or as

response laid the foundations for subsequent models of stress, which are broadly
conceived as environmental, medical and personal. Cox (1978) identified three
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distinctive models namely, response-based, stimulus-based, and interactive. Response- Notes

based models conceived of stress as a dependent variable, i.e., a response or reaction
to a stressor such as danger or over work. Stimulus-based models considered stress
as an environmental variable (such as excessive noise, cold, or tasks to be completed
in a short period of time), whereas, interactive models attempted to incorporate both
response and stimulus elements, as well as possible intervening factors such as
personality differences.

Among the first to promote the interactionist perspective was Lazarus (1966).
Central to his stress model was the concept of threat, which was regarded as an
imagined or anticipated future deprivation of something one value. Furthermore, threat
usually relates to “self”, and the maintenance and enhancement of the self is believed
to be a fundamental human motive. He refers to cognitive processes as “appraisal”
processes and they include attention, perception, evaluation, and so on. Primary
appraisal, which consists of processes involved in threat perception, is distinguished
from secondary appraisal, which is related to coping with and reducing threat.

Factors in both the environment and the person interact to determine both primary
and secondary appraisal. Physical elements, such as objective danger imminence
and ambiguity of cues, increase the potential for primary threat perception, as do
motivational characteristics and belief systems within the individual. Secondary
appraisal is governed by the interaction between situational constraints and coping
dispositions, and general beliefs about the environment and one’s resources. Lazarus’
(1996) theoretical formulation, with its emphasis on individual difference in threat
appraisal, has proved to be highly durable. It is, quite clearly, a psychological model of
stress.

A variation of the interactive model was suggested by Cox & Mackay (1976). The
central element concerned the dynamic relationship between four aspects of the
individual and the environment. The environment imposes demands and a constraint,
on the one hand and provides supports, on the other.

The individual possesses values, needs (demands), as well as coping resources.

Cognitive appraisal of demands and resources in continuous, and a perceived
imbalance between the two leads to the subjective experience of stress, as well as to
coping attempts may manifest through a variety of different outlets, such as cognitive
reappraisal, physiological responsively and/or behavioural activity. What is not made
clear, however, is the point at which responsibility should be termed as “stressful”, a
criticism that may be directed at interactive models generally.

Another variation of the interactive model was proposed by Cooper & Marshall
(1976) to describe workplace stress. Six potential sources of work stress were
identified, including factors intrinsic to the job, role-related factors, and interpersonal
relationships at work. These impinged upon each individual to some extent and could
hypothetically lead to any of a variety of symptoms of occupational ill health (e.g., Job
dissatisfaction, depressive moods or cardiovascular disease).

Some features are common to each interactive model. Whether explicit or implicitly,
the context in which each model is presented concerns adaptiveness and homeostasis.
Further more, each model fundamentally suggests that environmental stimuli (external,
stressors), individual differences (particularly with respect to cognitive appraisal
thereof), and various outcome measures (stress reactions) must all be considered
simultaneously. As such, these models attempt to isolate the parameters associated
with stress research. However, what they gain in breadth, they tend to lose in depth.
In other words, the focus on “what” variables need to be included takes place at the
expense of “how” (i.e., the mechanisms) stress actually occurs.
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The figure at para 7.3 presents an interactive model which suggests that stress arises
Notes only when certain individual factors (age and stage, personality, even mood) lead the
person to perceived certain circumstances (workload, change in boss) to be threatening.
Thus, neurotics, who are prone to anxiety, nearly always report having more qualitative
and quantitative stress than stable individuals. Once threatened, every person has coping
mechanisms, some adaptive and successful, others less so. The application of a healthy
coping mechanism to the perception and reality of stress leads to its reduction, but having
unsuccessful coping mechanisms can actually exacerbate the problem—turning an acute
problem into a chronic one.

7.2 Types of Stress

Every individual experiences different types of stress at one time or another. It
could be some personal stress arising in the work place, strained family relationships,
emotional stress caused by financial problems, post traumatic disorders, etc.

Eustress : This type of stress makes us feel good and are called as “good stress”
or “positive stress”. They exert a healthy effect on an individual. It gives an individual a
feeling of fulfillment or contentment and also makes one excited about life. But, it is a
type of stress that only occurs for a short period of time.

Eustress is also often called the curative stress, because it gives a person the ability
to generate the best performance, or maximum output.

Distress
Distress is a “negative stress”. It is a stress disorder that is caused by adverse events
and it often influences a person’s ability to cope. Some events leading to distress are:

• Death of a loved one

• Financial problems

• Heavy work responsibilities and workload

• Strained relationship

• Chronic illnesses

Distress can be classified further as acute stress or chronic stress. Acute stress is
short-lived, while chronic stress is usually prolonged in nature.

7.3 The Stress Process

The Stress Process
Environmental factors Individual factors

Judgment of Threat
Home/work/ personal life
Characteristics Physical Personality Attitudes,
State of Stress Demographic factors
conditions, Time deadlines

Coping
Successful Unsuccessful
Approach Style Avoidance Style

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This notion of a mismatch between demands and resources is central to the majority
of stress conceptualisations. McGrath’s (1976-1332) much quoted definition, like that of Notes
Lazarus (1996), focuses on perceptual factors in the individual.

A potential for stress exists when an environmental situation is perceived as

presenting a demand which threatens to exceed the person’s capabilities and resources
for meeting it, under conditions where she/he expects a substantial differential in the
rewards and costs for meeting the demand, versus not meeting it.

In many ways, this definition incorporates what most theorists see as the main
ingredients in stress, namely, subjective appraisal of a demanding environment, a
realisation that demands may outstrip resources, and that the consequences of not
coping are important. In the absence of a universally agreed definition of stress, the
widely accepted protocol of describing environmental factors as “stressors”, individual
responses as “strains”, and the vast gamut of mediating activity in the from of cognitive
processing and personality dispositions as “intervening variables” can be usefully
adopted.

7.4 Common Symptoms of Stress

Physiological Symptoms
These are generally reflected as:

• A noticeable decline in physical appearance.

• Chronic fatigue and tiredness.

• Frequent infections, especially respiratory infections.

• Health complaints, such as headaches backaches, stomach and skin problems.

• Sings of depression, change in weight in weight or eating habits.

Emotional Symptoms
A person suffering from these may exhibit:

• Boredom or apathy: lack of affect and hopelessness.

• Cynicism and resentfulness.

• Depressed appearance, sad expressions, slumped posture.

• Expressions of anxiety, frustration, tearfulness

Behavioural Symptoms
Some of the Symptoms are:

• Absenteeism, accidents.

• Increase in alcohol or caffeine consumption; increased smoking

• Obsessive exercising

• Irrational: quick to fly off the handle.

• Reduced productivity; inability to concentrate or complete a task.

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