FIXATION INTRIGUE…?

I was deeply in search of this vocabulary for this month; it isn’t just a vocabulary indeed it’s a
life sucking vampire is what I’m left with after the search. Unbelievable!!!

I know we all have our own understanding about fixations, how many of us can peel out our
experiences or even sense our own fixations? Then comes you know, articulating it and looking
out for an intervention! Psychology gives us a vast clarity on the term fixation.

You know what each of us have one or more areas of fixation in life. Do we have it from our
childhood is a question mark here. Then how do we have it; even without realizing what’s
happening within us and how people around us feels by it? This is imbedded in us accidently or
incidentally through our parenting.

Let me take you into the world of psychology!

You know the origin of fixation begins from psychosexual theory which affirms that people’s
development and behavior is being sourced by the interaction between the conscious and
unconscious mind. So it is clear why we behave or think in certain ways, right?

Fixation seeds in us during our early childhood due to the deprivations like dependency and
aggression. Fixation shows up right from adolescence and the impact is heavier while we are
turning an adult. It roots out from an area of our childhood which remains unhealthy or
unaddressed; we are subconsciously programmed to carry out that incompletion within which
at later stage spills out as fixation!

We’ve been seeing the theoretical part of fixation, now let me take you into the reality of life.
Interested? So how many of you have a rigid or a fixed way of doing something with which you
like or it could be something which you don’t like too? I want you to look into your behavioral
pattern in this aspect.

You can see them as I spell out some hints for you,

 It could be in the way how you make your sleeping place ready (perfect, cannot bear if
others intrude in the style you align it, need of cleanliness more)
 It could be in the way of you choosing a your dishes like plates or tumblers (tempting for
more hygiene, cannot share at all)
 It could be in the way of self-grooming (specific ways of dressing up, maintaining more
privacy, having not people share their things with others)
 It could be in the way of self-compulsion which is subjected outward (like this is how I
should hang my cloth, stake my books, write this way, this is how the foot-mate should
be placed, my jug must be in this position, etc.,)
 It could be in the way of self-compulsion which is subjected inward (like I need to brush
after I eat every time, if I feel my hand is sticky or sweaty I should wash it well with soap
however times it could be, dwellgoing behind our gadgets, etc.,)

The next step right after you could mean what I say is really hard to accept. When I say it is hard
to accept then only means because you know for ages we have grown with and been with it as
a part of our life; now if you need to be seeing it as something from the past of course it would
be confronting. My point here is not to make it wrong or make you wrong in having it as one of
your character as far you don’t suffer from that behavior of yours; then comes the others who
are the sufferer due to that behavior of yours! Does it mean now?

The bitter truth is that we cannot peel out the fixation from our behavior; it is going to be our
true character for us, we get see as our nature too while actually it is not! Our brain cannot
distinguish that we adapt certain way of being into us from specific incident from which we
have decided to take a shift of character in us. This unfortunately unbelievably at times eats us
up in life, people even choose to die rather to give up this fixation in them, and the miserable
part in this is that they would not even know that it is the fixation that is cribbing the life!

If you see that you are stuck somewhere in life, if you feel that there is a profound sense of
connectedness in this article, you want to better understand certain why’s and how’s in you,
feel free to call me!

Farhana

Psychologist