!

Dear Friend,

For many, New Year’s Day is a day of new

beginnings. Resolutions are made, lists are created,
workout equipment is purchased, and budgets are
realigned. It’s exciting to shove off into a “new
beginning” and (finally) make some progress toward
a goal or dream. But a month or two later . . . not so
much. It takes work and a lot of willpower to keep a
good thing going—especially considering the state of
the world at this time.

In an insightful article on his blog, James Clear

(author of Atomic Habits) shares five reasons why
habits don’t always stick:

1. Trying to Change Everything at Once

2. Starting With a Habit That is Too Big
3. Seeking a Result, Not a Ritual
4. Not Changing Your Environment
5. Assuming Small Changes Don’t Add Up

Although this information (coupled with the solutions

presented) is helpful for any and all habits, I want to
focus in on the keystone habit of improving our
relationships. One way to do that is by learning to
consistently speak the primary love language of
others. James Clear writes, “New goals don’t
deliver new results. New lifestyles do. And a
lifestyle is not an outcome, it is a process. For
this reason, all of your energy should go into
building better rituals, not chasing better
results.”

It breaks down like this: A date night can be fun, but

a lifestyle that embraces Quality Time is better.
Washing the dishes can be helpful, but a lifestyle of
Acts of Service is cherished. A text messaged heart
emoji is thoughtful, but a lifestyle of Words of
Affirmation speaks volumes. You get the picture.

With this in mind, we created a unique app to help

couples express love more consistently to one
another in ways that truly connect. It’s called Love
Nudge and it's like having a personal assistant for
your relationship. And . . . it’s completely FREE.

As we enter 2021, head on over to

5lovelanguages.com/app to see how this unique app
can help you confidently grow closer to the one you
love . . . one language at a time.

Happy New Year, my friends. May this be your best

year yet!

Warmly,

Dr. Gary Chapman

Author of The 5 Love Languages®
Discover your love language at 5lovelanguages.com

P.S. Let’s connect! Join me on Facebook, Twitter,

Instagram, or the new 5 Love Languages group on
Facebook.

Could you use a little creativity in speaking love and

appreciation to others? Here are a few suggestions
to inspire you:

WORDS OF AFFIRMATION: “My

boyfriend and I are in a long distance
relationship. When he sends me a text
message that I really love, I save it. Then,
the next time we’re together, he reads the
saved messages back to me. It’s a great
way to be reminded of how he feels about
me, and to hear it in his own voice.”
—Samantha

ACTS OF SERVICE: “Heading into winter,

I like to make the bed with an electric
blanket on my wife's side of the bed a few
hours before bedtime. The comfort of
crawling into a bed that feels like a warm
cinnamon roll melts her in my arms and
helps us have a wonderful night of sleep.”
—Jeff

GIFTS: “The language of gifts can be

nuanced. I found that my wife scored gifts
high, though she banned me from giving
her presents/gifts in private. What she
likes is public gifts (e.g., flowers to her
office, stopping by the office with
something). It's the private gifts—those
she has to tell someone I gave her—that
seem to not fit the bill.” —Grant

QUALITY TIME: “Due to COVID, we have

been living in separate homes and missing
our 'in-person' date nights. We decided to
get creative by sending each other a
calendar invite for a 'virtual' date night
using Zoom—taking turns setting the
theme and dress for the occasion. We
each bring drinks and nibbles, and we
sing, dance, and create fun games
together.” —Jacqueline

PHYSICAL TOUCH: “When we started

wearing masks because of COVID, we
took a break from giving each other quick
kisses and pecks on the cheek even
though we're both love Physical Touch.
Now we touch masks—giving each other a
peck on the lips with our masks on. It may
seem silly, but it makes us look forward to
our physical time at home (without masks)
even more!” —Sue

If you would like to suggest a creative way in which

you speak a particular love language, we'd love to
hear from you. Click here to send us your
suggestions.

Disclaimer: Any information or suggestions in this newsletter are for general

informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional,
counseling, legal and/or medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you require
professional, counseling, legal and/or medical advice, please consult a qualified
practitioner or therapist.

Copyright © 2020 Northfield Publishing, an imprint of Moody Publishers

Our address is 820 North LaSalle Boulevard, Chicago, IL 60610, United States

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