Title

[Student’s Name]

[Institute’s Name]

[Date]
Kyoko Peatvienna feedback

The paper's thesis is concise, and there are no grammatical errors. However, several aspects of
the reasoning are unclear. Transition words mark some of the different sections and arguments
you're making in the paper for the reader. But keep in mind that the document isn't merely a list
of bullet points. This is linked to my argumentation comment. The paper's main flaw, as stated
throughout, is its lack of authentic sources. Also, as previously stated, the opening has to be more
explicit. Don't be concerned if give away the primary idea right away; in philosophy, this is a
positive thing. Citing keeps honest and holds responsible to the text. It is not just excellent
academic etiquette or beneficial to the reader.  May avoid making this mistake by citing each
statement. The article weaves together a variety of overlapping concepts, demonstrating a strong
understanding of some of the key issues addressed in the literature. I have confidence in the
potential to grow.