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Rajnikanth joined CID ..... Guess what happened????.......... Rajnikanth found the criminal before the crime........ East India Company left India in 1947, Because Rajnikanth was supposed to be born in 1948. Once bush said Rajnikanth don't have any power and now the new president is Obama. When Rajinikanth enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on... he turns the dark off. Rajinikanth can slam a revolving door. Facebook World : ...................................................................................................................... Facebook updates states for rajnikanth | Rajnikanths angerness may block facebook forever | Facebook receives notifications from rajnikanth. The statement nobody can cheat death, is a personal insult to Rajnikanth. Rajni cheats and fools death everyday. When Rajnikant was studyin in 3rd std....some1 stole his rough notes....and Now they call it as .............Wikipedia!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Punchured tyre of rajnikanths vehical doesnt effect the speed of Rajnikanth. Rajinikanth once got into a fight with a VCR player. Now it plays DVDs. Rajnikant once won an argument with his wife Rajinikanth killed the Dead Sea. Once rajnikanath read all the jokes published on internet and the next day he warns every user on internet stop publishing jokes about me on internet else i will delete the internet RajnikanthRocks !!! When Gabbar singh was an infant and used to cry at night, his mother used to tell him Beta so ja warna Rajnikant aa jayega. Recently China airports were closed due to heavy fog. Later it was discovered that Rajnikanth was smoking in India!

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Rajnikant is chased by a gangster. Rajnikant has a revolver but no bullets in it. Rajnikant waits for the gangster to shoot. As soon as the gangster shoots, Rajnikant opens the bullet compartment of his revolver and catches the bullet. Then, he closes the bullet compartment and fires his gun. Bang the gangster dies Rajnikanths next project is the Titanic in Tamil. However, Rajni has twisted the climax. Both the lead actors survive. Rajni swims across the Atlantic Ocean with the heroine in one hand and... The Titanic in the other! Great mystery solved : the missing piece of apple in Apples Logo was eaten by Rajnikant!! The world is not ending in 2012....... Rajnikanth just bought a laptop with 3 yrs warranty!! Rajinikant can give pain to Painkillers and headache to Anacin. ISRO does not exist anymore. Rajnikanth bought all the rockets for Diwali! Rajnikanth once told a lady - "Tu stage pe jake gaa"... ... That lady is known as lady gaga..... Rajnikant was once told to choose 3 subjects when he got admission in college. He chose science, arts and commerce!!!!!!! Rajnikanth got his drivers license at the age of 16 Seconds. Rajnikanth calculates the time of stopwatch when he participates in race. Rajnikanth pays salary to his boss. When rajnikanth does overtime work gets tired. Once Rajnikanth gave his white pair clothes to a child. that child is today known as sultan mirza. Rajinikanth can play the violin with a piano. Rajnikant can make calls from his iPod to his iPad. Rajinikanth does not own a stove, oven, or microwave, because revenge is a dish best served cold.

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Once Rajnikaant signed a cheque and the Bank bounced! Rajinikanth doesnt move at the speed of light. Light moves at the speed of Rajinikanth. When GOD is shocked he exclaims Oh my Rajnikaant! rajanis in house fish tank was broken and it occupied the 79% of earth under water and left the 29 % to us. Rajnikant knows the exact value of Pi upto a Googol. Rajinikanth got small pox when he was a kid. As a result small pox is now eradicated. Rajnikant knows what came first, chicken or egg!! Rajinikanths calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Rajanikanth. When Rajnikanth stares at the sun in anger, the sun hides behind the moon, and this phenomena is knows as a Solar Eclipse! Rajnikanth's web server address is //PTTH:rajnikanthjokes.org Scientific communitys question Which liquid turns solid on heating? , answered by Rajnikanth DOSA. Rajnikanth gave his umbrella to a very thin and poor child....... that child is today known as popatlal of tarak mehta ka ulta chasma.. When Rajnikant switches on his AC without closing the door, Winterstarts in India. Free Recharged top up for every mobile phone *Enna Rascalla*Rajnikanth# Rajinikanth can grow mangoes on banana tree. Rajnikant does not install an anti-virus on his PC. All computer virus are looking foran Anti-Rajanikant software to save themselves from hands of Rajanikant. Rajnikanth can go forward by walking backward.

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Rajnikanth can speak chinese in Tamil language. The Government of India pays tax to Rajnikanth for living here! Rajinikanth leaves messages before the beep. Rajinikanth can answer a missed call. Rajinikanth doesnt need a visa to travel abroad; he just jumps from the tallest building in Chennai and holds himself in the air while the earth rotates. Rajinikanth knows Victorias secret. Water boils faster when Rajinikanth stares at it. Rajinikanth can win at Solitaire with only 18 cards. Rajinikanth once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are today called giraffes. There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Rajnikant lives in Chennai! Rajinikanth can play the violin with a piano. Once Rajnikanth got so excited and he yelled loudly "Yaaaahoo".. now it is known as Yahoo.com Rajani can find corner in a circle. Ek Baar Ek Judge ne Rajnikanth Ko Crime Karte Hue Dekh Liya.. To Kya..? .............. Tabse Kanoon Andha Ho Gaya.. This message is being sent by Rajnikanth in the interest of humanity: Stop forwarding jokes on me, otherwise I will delete your `forward` option. Why does needle of magnetic compass always point towards North? Becoz Rajnikanth lives in the South and no one can point at him. When Graham Bell invented telephone, he already had 2 missed calls from Rajnikanth. Girl (romantically) to Rajnikanth: 1 chutki sindoor ki keemat tum kya jano? Rajnikanth: 0.00078924576 Rs. per gram. Don`t mess with Rajni!

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Once Rajnikanth threw an ignited cigarette up in the sky. It fell on a planet, which is now known as `SUN`. Q: Why Rajnikanth doesn`t play cricket? A: Bcoz Sachin Tendulkar requested him to keep his world records intact. Part of apple`s logo that is missing was eaten by Rajnikanth. There in nothing RajiniKant do. Even Ghajini remembers Rajni! Rajinikanth can delete the Recycle Bin. Time and tide wait for Rajinikant Rajnikant has a Brain Tumor which, according to the doctors cant be cured and his death is imminent. In one of the fights, our great Rajnikant is shot in the head. To everybodys surprise, the bullet passes through his ears taking away the tumor along with it and he is cured! Long Live Rajnikant! Rajinikanth can build a snowman out of rain. Rajnikanth woke up one day and decided he would share one per cent of his knowledge with the world. Thus, Google was born! In another movie, Rajnikant is confronted with 3 gangsters. Rajnikant has a gun but unfortunately only one bullet and a knife. He throws the knife at the middle gangster& shoots the bullet towards the knife. The knife cuts the bullet into 2 pieces, which kills both the gangsters on each side of the middle gangster & the knife kills the middle one. Rajinikanth sneezed only once in his entire life, thats when the tsunami occurred in the Indianocean. Rajnikanth did his KG from seven different schools. Today those institutions are known as IITs! Rajnikanth bought 2 elephants , 2 camels and 2 horses from the zoo Why? To Play chess!!!!!! Amitab bachhan, sharuk khan, amir khan, hritik roshan, salman khan are the back benchers of rajnikanth acting classes.

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Earth quake took place in japan cause the mobile battery of rajani was faulty, which was made in japan. While rajani was a child, while playing he made the egypt piramids. Before rat and elephant were of same size rajani gave elephant his one biscuit to eat and result is in front of you Rajnikant khana banane Jawalamukhi par gaya. Contrary to popular belief, Rajnikant cannot fly. He just jumps and chooses when to come down. If Rajnikant gets into a car accident (yeah right) His car will need some airbags to protect it from him. Rajini doesnt need water supply. Hydrogen and Oxygen merge at the sight of him and produce water whenever he wants. Intels new caption Rajnikant Inside.

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Rajnikanth doesn`t shave. He just looks in the mirror and dares hair to grow. Headlines of Today: Ek train cycle ki chapet mein aayi, train mein sawar sabhi log mare gaye. Cyclist, Rajnikanth Faraar! Rajnikanth killed a terrorist in Pakistan `via Bluetooth`. Rajnikanth was practicing for a spelling test, the rough sheet he used is known as Oxford dictionary. The new Rupee symbol is actually Rajnikanth`s signature. I don`t fear exams now because at the beginning of every answer. I shall write: `According to Rajnikanth.` Rajnikanth wear sunglasses to save the sun from his eyes. Rajnikanth ordered a dosa at MacDonald`s and he got it.

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Q:Why India`s enemies like China and Pakistan are in north. A:Because Rajnikant is in south. The ultimate and the Rajnikanth award goes to `OSCAR`! Rajnikants email id is gmail@rajnikant.com What is the moral of Rajnikant\'s movie THE ROBOT . Ladki sirf insan ka he nhi... . . . . MACHINE ka bhi dimag kharab kr sakti hai. Rajanikanth does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die. Once a cobra bit Rajanikanth leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died. Rajanikanth can kill two stones with one bird. Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Rajanikanth. Rajanikanth destroyed the periodic table, because Rajanikanth only recognizes the element of surprise. The square root of Rajanikanth is pain. Do not try to square Rajanikanth, the result is death. Once there was a race between a Ferrari and tata nano. The tata nano wan, guess why? Rajni was driving it. Rajnikant make a mobile! Mobile Name-R1 Video Format- mp5,mp6 Audio Format- mp7,up8,Ap9 Internal Memory- Unlimited Blacktooth redtooth Whitetooth Scaner Printer all available 4G,5G Speed Camera- 1000mega block buster pixel No need to Sim card Roming no anywhere just on Planet PLUTO Charger NO Charge on air Speaker- DJ Quality Screen- 32 inch InternetFree till Death Rajnikanth at Work General Electric (GE) I am Rajnikanth! What? Rajnikanth I am Reebok Connecting Rajnikanth Nokia Hello Rajnikanth Motorola

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Express Rajnikanth Airtel Cellular Service India A Rajnikanth can change your life Idea Cellular India Do you rajnikanth!? Yahoo One night at 2AM in the morning Rajni gets a phone call saying, Congratulation Rajnikant you have won the Noble Peace prize and an all expense paid trip to Bangkok. Rajni puts the phone down, Mr. Rajnikant asks who was it? Rajni replies. Some bloody telemarketing guy. Anhoni ko honi karde honi ko anhoni, ek jagah jab Jama ho teeno RAJNI , GAJANI aur DHONI. Rajinikanth kills Harry Potter in the ninth book After release of Robot, Rajnikanth gave Times of India 3 stars. Breaking news: Rajnikanth was shot today. Tomorrow is the bullet`s funeral. Ram and Ravan seriously yudh kar rahe the ki Achanak! .............. .. Ravan : Chal bye... ... ... Ram : Kyu!!?? ... ... ... ... Ravan : Nahi yaar, Bye... ... ... ... Ram : Abey par hua kya?!... ... ... ... Ravan : Piche dekh!... ... ... .... ..... Rajnikant!!! Rajinikant doesnt wear a watch. He decides what time it is. Ghosts are actually caused by Rajanikanth killing people faster than Death can process them. Rajinikanth is a champion in the game Hide n seek, as no one can hide from Rajinikanth. RAJNIKANTH purchased a 4040 acre land with 4 wells at each corner of that square site. Guess y? Simple.. TO PLAY CARROM. When Rajnikant closes his eyes, it becomes night. Rajnikant can takes 11 wickets in one over. Once rajni was swimming in sea - - - - - - - - the tsunami formed.

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Once there was a massive accident between a cycle and a train. The train was destructed. Why??? . . . . . . . . because RAJANIKANTH was Sitting on the cycle. Friends after 100 years Guess wat will be the years called? . . .. . . A.R. and B.R. (After RajiniKanth and Before RajiniKanth). Rajanikanth can access his Facebook account without any email id, mobile number and password. Once Hritik Roshan & RAJANIKANT participate in DANCE compition. at the end result Hritik suffers in GUZARIS film. Once a mosquito bitten rajni so guess waht happened???.. Mosquito suffered from dengue. When ranjnikanth is Driving Car on the road , all signals on road get automatic Green for him , and Red for all others. Why ArmStrong was jumping on MOON when he land first time ?.. . . . . . Because he saw Ranjnikant and his children were playing Cricket on MOON. Rajnikant has his own satellite revolving around the earth for his own mobile service. RAjnikant never user ATM card , he just put the finger in ATM machine and get the amount what he want. GABAR Says : Kitne ADMI Thai Kaliya Says: Rajnikant Sarkar GABAR :GABAR left Ramgad with his army. bill getes-mera ghar itna bada hai ki ander local train chalti hai. rajni-mera ghar itna bada hai ki ghar me call karne k leya kone me chale jao to roaming lagta hai. Rajnikant was born on 30th february.. Since then february decided not to give this date to anyone else. Once upon a time Rajanikanth used tooth powder 2 get strong teeth . . . . . . 2day that powder is known as Ambuja Cements

The death of Micheal jackson is revealed . . . The day before he died He saw Rajanikanths Dance And he got shocked . . . . . . . Because rajani had performed SUN WALK. Rajnikanths dog house has a signboard on it saying. . . . . . . . . Beware of Rajnikant!! Who can stop 100 cars with one hand? . . . . . . . . Ans- Its Traffic police Not Rajnkant. Once while sleeping rajni was uttering some numbers. the collection, today is known as log table. Rajnikanth can move the clock in anti-clockwise direction Once RAJNIKANTH was crossing a highway when suddenly a 32 wheeler lorry banged against him with full force! . . .and the conclusion . . We all now know that lorry as . . TATA NANO yenna rascalla?? Mind it. Once a Rajnis photo was placed for Xerox Guess What Happened? We Had 2 XEROX MACHINES. Barish hui aur bheeg gaye hum..wah wah Barish hui aur bheeg gaye hum wah wah Aage kya hua? Hona kya tha, Rajnikant ne phoonk mari, Aur sukh gaye hum!! When Neil Armstrong landed on the moon, he was welcome by Rajnikanth who said hello, Armstrong. Rajnikanth can drive a car at a speed of 120 km/h in neutral gear. Rajnikanth once entered a race he came first, second and third. Rajnikanth added facebook as his friend. Once Rajnikant was caught on the highway for over speeding while walking An email was sent from Pune to Mumbai Rajnikant stopped it in Lonawala. Once Rajnikanth was on Hot Seat of KBC and Computer needed Lifeline to Choose the question.

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If Rajinikanths PC hangs, its time for the next Windows release by Microsoft. Once Bill Gates went to Rajnikant. For what? To ask for DVD of Windows 8. Graham Bell ne lamppost ke neeche padhai ki..Rabindranath Tagore ne laalten mein padhai ki. Einstein ne doosre logo ki khidki se aati thodi si roshni mein padhai ki. Aur Rajnikanth ne Agarbatti ke niche padhai ki.. Why Osama isnt caught? Well!! Rajnikanth isnt interested. One day Rajnikanth bunked school, now its known as Sunday. My laptop is now totally safe from trojans and virus I just installed RAJNIKANTH Antivirus in my system. Gf: Mera koi picha karte rehta hai Rajni: ok.. Next day Gf: Hey where the hell is My Shadow???? Rajanikanth can eat lunch before breakfast. No one is perfect, Rajnikant is no one. Rajnikanth swaps his visitng cards at ATMs to get cash Impossible is Rajnikanth Adidas The car in front is Rajnis Toyota.

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