Rajnikanth 1. Rajinikanth killed the Dead Sea. 2. When Rajinikanth does push-ups, he isnt lifting himself up.

He is pushing the earth down. 3. There is no such thing as evolution, its just a list of creatures that Rajinikanth allowed to live. 4. Rajinikanth gave Mona Lisa that smile. 5 .Rajnikanth can divide by zero. 6. Rajinikanth can judge a book by its cover. 7. Rajinikanth can drown a fish. 8. Rajinikanth can delete the Recycle Bin. 9. Rajinikanth once got into a fight with a VCR player. Now it plays DVDs. 10. Rajinikanth can slam a revolving door. 11. Rajinikanth once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are today called giraffes. 12. Rajinikanth once ordered a plate of idli in McDonalds, and got it. 13. Rajinikanth can win at Solitaire with only 18 cards. 14. The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Rajinikanth kicked one of the corners off. 15. Rajinikanth can build a snowman out of rain. 16. Rajinikanth can strangle you with a cordless phone. 17. Rajinikanth can make onions cry. 18. Rajinikanth destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise. 19. Rajinikanth can watch the show 60 minutes in 20 minutes. 20. Rajinikanth has counted to infinity, twice. 21. Rajinikanth will attain separate statehood in 2013. 22. Rajinikanth did in fact, build Rome in a day. 23. Rajinikanth once got into a knife-fight. The knife lost. 24. Rajinikanth can play the violin with a piano. 25. Rajinikanth never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself in fear. 26. The only man who ever outsmarted Rajinikanth was Stephen Hawking, and he got what he deserved. 27. Rajanikanth can do a wheelie on a unicycle. 28. Rajinikanth doesnt breathe. Air hides in his lungs for protection. 29. There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. Rajinikanth lives in Chennai. 30. Rajinikanth kills Harry Potter in the eighth book.

31. If you spell Rajanikanth wrong on Google it doesnt say, Did you mean Rajanikanth? It simply replies, Run while you still have the chance. 32. Rajinikanth has already been to Mars, thats why there are no signs of life there. 33. Rajinikanth doesnt move at the speed of light. Light moves at the speed of Rajinikanth. 34. Rajinikanth knows Victorias secret. 35. Water boils faster when Rajinikanth stares at it. 36. Rajanikanth was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop. 37. Rajinikanth kills two stones with one bird. 38. Google wont find Rajinikanth because you dont find Rajinikanth; Rajinikanth finds you. 39. Rajinikanth gave the Joker those scars. 40. Rajinikanth leaves messages before the beep. 41. Rajinikanth once warned a young girl to be good or else. The result? Mother Teresa. 42. Rajinikant electrocuted Iron Man. 43. Rajinikanth killed Spiderman using Baygon Anti Bug Spray. 44. Rajinikanth can make PCs better than the Mac. 45. Rajinikanth puts the laughter in manslaughter. 46. Rajinikanth goes to court and sentences the judge. 47. Rajinikanth can handle the truth. 48. Rajinikanth can speak Braille. 49. Bullets dodge Rajanikanth. 50. Rajinikanth can teach an old dog new tricks. 51. Rajinikanth calls Voldemort by his name. 52. The last digit of pi is Rajanikanth. He is the end of all things. 53. When Rajanikanth enters a room, he doesnt turn the lights on, . he turns the dark off. 54. Ghosts are actually caused by Rajanikanth killing people faster than Death can process them. 55. Rajinikanths calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Rajanikanth. 56. Rajinikanth grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage. 57. The last time Rajinikanth killed someone, he slapped himself to do it. The other guy just disintegrated. Resonance. 58. Rajinikanth once had a heart attack. His heart lost. 59. Rajinikant is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head. 60. Rajinikanth can run at speed of light around a tree and screw himself. 61.Rajinikant can lick his elbows. 62. Rajinikant once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink. 63. Rajinikant does not get frostbite. Rajnikant bites frost. 64. Rajinikant doesnt wear a watch. He decides what time it is. 65. Rajinikant got his drivers license at the age of 16 seconds. 66. When you say no one is perfect, Rajinikant takes this as a personal insult. 67. In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Rajinikanth could use to kill you, including the room itself. 68. Words like awesomeness, brilliance, legendary etc. were added to the dictionary in the year 1949. That was the year Rajinikanth was born. 69. The statement nobody can cheat death, is a personal insult to Rajnikanth. Rajni cheats and fools death everyday. 70. When Rajnikanth is asked to kill some one he doesnt know, he shoots the bullet and directs it the day he finds out. 71. Rajinikant can give pain to Painkillers and headache to Anacin. 72. Rajinikanth knows what women really want. 73. Time and tide wait for Rajinikanth. 74. Rajinikanth sneezed only once in his entire life, thats when the tsunami occurred in the Indian ocean. 75. Rajnikanth taught Voldemort Parseltongue. 76. Rajinikanth collects Honey from his private Moon HoneyMoon. 77. Rajinikanth can answer a missed call. 78. Rajinikanth doesnt need a visa to travel abroad, he just jumps from the tallest building in Chennai and holds himself in the air

while the earth rotates. 79. Rajinikanths brain works faster than Chacha Chaudhurys. 80. Rajinikanth doesnt shower. He only takes blood baths. 81. To be or not to be? That is the question. The answer? Rajinikanth. 82. The quickest way to a mans heart is with Rajinikanths fist. 83. Where there is a will, there is a way. Where there is Rajinikanth, there is no other way. 84. Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Rajanikanth. 85. Rajinikant doesnt bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint out of fear. 86. Archaeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined victim as one who has encountered Rajinikant. 87. There is no such thing as global warming. Rajinikanth was feeling cold, so brought the sun closer to heat the earth up. 88. Once a cobra bit Rajinikanth leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died. 89. Rajinikanth is a champion in the game Hide n seek, as no one can hide from Rajinikanth. 90. Rajinikant proves Newton wrong all the time. Every time he performs an action, he simply eliminates anything and everything that can provide the reaction. 91. Rajinikant is a weapon created by God to use on doomsday to end the world. 92. Aliens do indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Rajinikanth is on. 93. We live in an expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Rajinikanth. 94. If at first you dont succeed, youre not Rajinikanth. 95. Rajinikanths first job was as a bus conductor. There were no survivors. 96. Rajinikanth does not style his hair. It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror. 97. When Rajinikanth plays Monopoly, it affects the actual world economy. 98. It takes Rajanikanth 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes. 99. Rajinikanths house has no doors, only walls that he walks through. 100. Rajnikanth doesnt answer natures call nature answers Rajnikanths call!! 101. Rajanikanth does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die. -Hitendra You may also like from the same blogger: We need a revolution in the education system in India?

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About hsonline
A passionate blogger. Interested in current affairs, literature, music, movies, philosophy... View all posts by hsonline
168 Comments
Posted by hsonline on 28, 2010 in Current Issues ( : Actor, Film, Fun, Humour, Jokes, Movies, Rajnikanth

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Indian Universities fail in world rankings. [IE Editorial:Breaking rank]

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168 Responses to 101 Rajnikanth Jokes!!

1. lego
3, 2010 at 5:37

This is hilarious. He is an absolute super star! Reply

2. Manas Khatri
4, 2010 at 6:51

..!! Reply

jitu
27, 2010 at 5:19

hi i whant tow rajnikant tamil acoter mobile number ok can u help me thank you Reply

VIJAY
25, 2011 at 12:21

0000000001 PLS ADD 0 IF OUT OF KARNATAKA Reply

Rajnikant
25, 2011 at 6:09

Number R9A5J4N5I6K2A4N1T Reply

yuvraj singh chandrawat

23, 2011 at 3:52

ur great is my best Reply

3. Josephmohan
9, 2010 at 12:22

Its cool!!! Reply

parveen
23, 2010 at 10:27

Rajnikanths Ball do not grow hair because these are made of steel. Reply

hari
25, 2010 at 1:17

otha thevidiya parveeen pool thalaya Reply

4. Abhishek DuttaGupta
9, 2010 at 4:32

1) BREAKING NEWS: NASA DOESNT EXIST ANYMORE!!! Because RAJNI SIR purchased all the rockets for Diwali celebration! 2) RAJNIKANTH purchased a 4040 acre land with 4 wells at each corner of that square site. Guess y? Simple.. TO PLAY CARROM. 3) RajniKanth once farted after a heavy meal . . . . . . . .

. Thats how our EARTH got its OZONE layer.!! 4) Rajnikanth had died 20 years ago But DEATH hasnt build up the courage to tell him yet. 5) Rajnikanth can finish MARIO and CONTRA without using the jump button! 6) Rajnikanth doesnt pay attention. Attention PAYS him.!! 7) After 50 years, Robots will make a movie named RAJNIKANTH.. After 80 years, even the Ghost of Rajnikanth will be a SUPERSTAR. Y did the BRITISH leave INDIA in 1947? Because they came to know that a baby named RAJNIKANTH was about to be born in 1949;) Reply

ayush
18, 2010 at 2:07

wat a super jokes dat i only died in 1949 Reply

rajnikanth
11, 2010 at 10:30

Thanks FOlks Reply

raavan
13, 2010 at 7:26

You are a racist! you people never allow anyone to grow on their soil!! Even, you people are giving respect to the hardworking, dedicated and respectful sardars!! Do you people are considering north-east Indians as an indians? See You Back!! Its Stinking!! Reply

hari
25, 2010 at 1:19

daii SHAHRUKH khan amitabh thevidiya pasangala!!!!! Reply

5.

: Rajnikanth Fortune 6109

6. farhan
13, 2010 at 9:37

made me forget the rough day i had. thank u freinds Reply

mehul
18, 2010 at 7:19

nice one but i dont agree this comment. Reply

7. hyu
16, 2010 at 1:59

nice pj Reply

8. Nishant kulkarni
17, 2010 at 1:28

damn good pjs Reply

9. Sumit Saharan
17, 2010 at 9:43

(1)Rajnikant can takes 11 wickets in one over . . (2)When Rajnikant closes his eyes,it becomes night . . (3)Rajnis year is of infinite days . . (4)The British leaves India when they came to know that Rajni will born. Add these jokes Reply

10. rakhul
18, 2010 at 6:37

sardarji gave rajni 500crores for diverting all the jokes towards him Reply

hasti
10, 2010 at 2:54

gud one Reply

11. zorawar singh

19, 2010 at 1:46

rajnikats email id is gmail@rajnikant.com Reply

12. zorawar singh

19, 2010 at 1:47

facebook joined Rajnikant..!.. Reply

13. zorawar singh

19, 2010 at 1:52

once dinosaurs borrowed money from rajnikant and refused to pay him back. that was the last time anyone saw dinosaurs they went extinct..! Reply

Rajnikanth
14, 2011 at 2:57

Y dinosaurs needed money u IDIOT??????? Reply

TVA
19, 2011 at 10:03

Plz dont read jokes its not good for ur health. Reply

14. SUDEEP
19, 2010 at 5:30

HE IS GOD !!!!!!! Reply

raj
19, 2011 at 5:41

behenchod sale Reply

15. vivek kumar

19, 2010 at 10:24

your jokes are awesome dude. Reply

16. Himanshu
20, 2010 at 8:17

once rajni was swimming in sea the tsunami formed.;-/ Reply

17. Aditya Lele

20, 2010 at 11:35

So many jokes on rajnikanth on the internet, does any one know who wrote them? Rajnikant does. and no one will ever know again. Reply

18. aNsHybOy
20, 2010 at 12:09

hey guys this is a better one once rajnikanth was fighting on a truck and some of his blood fell in the trucks engine. Now we know the truck as optimus prime. Reply

19. ABC
21, 2010 at 5:54

Once reporters asked rajnikanth : people make jokes of you., dont u feel bad.. Rajnikanth replied: who makes jokes of me. They are all telling the truth. Reply

20. Dhaval
22, 2010 at 1:00

More companies Investing in Power sector in India as we need more energy Rajnikant has bought one more cell phone..!!! Everyday in India power cut by one second..Bcoz Ranjikant Charges his mobile Reply

21. pankaj
22, 2010 at 5:43

my god!!!!!!!!!! . . i cant imagine .. .. hai kya ye Rajnikant, we are so thankful to rajnikant he is a hero not Vilene, otherwise hero always die in movie Reply

22. vishal
23, 2010 at 12:03

i have so many msges of Rajni sir in my cell phone ..so my phone is working without battery this days !!!! ha ha ha ha.thanks to Rajni sir Reply

23. indian
23, 2010 at 9:40

dude this is not some kinda joke.. he is a superstar! dont we have salman and other cheap rascals to do such hilarious comedies.. grow up.. dont divide india by making fun of south indian actors.. none of other indian actors has gesture of rajnikanth he is such a big star but is humble.. tell me one actor who is so noble?? look at bollywood actors and directors? no one is making their own movie.. copying from bengali malyalam tamil telgu movies, only that bollywood has money.. not even music is good in bollywood if not a.r.rahman.. Reply

 AJ
24, 2010 at 1:07

common relax man, they are just jokes. we love rajni, who else could put comedy in an action movie other then him Reply

jamal
7, 2010 at 4:16

Dear friend no one is dividing south indian and boolywood it is you who is giving a joke an ethnic or communal color,we never ever heard before any thing the one u want to say or said already, please appologize to everyone. we all love rajnikant. regards Reply

jacky
10, 2010 at 7:03

abe gandu once rajnikant wants to fight with me. pachi shu aapde to aapi didhi ek undha haath ni benchodne. aapde to rajni hoy k gajini lode latke aa shu benchod roj roj Reply

hari
25, 2010 at 1:21

heyy name an actor frm ur place fcker !!! Reply

tyagi
27, 2010 at 2:15

u r a real basterd hw can u say that abt him, Rajini is God. Reply

nana
31, 2011 at 9:52

m***********g shit bicth ass wipe bastard. Reply

Rajnikanth
14, 2011 at 2:53

MOTHERFUCKER why are the stars for?????? Reply

TVA
19, 2011 at 10:10

BETA GAAND MEIN DUM HO TO SABKE SAAMNE AAKAR YE BOL WAHI CHALAA JAAYEGA JAHAA SE AAYA THA TERI MAA KO PHIR SE TUJHE PAIDA KARNA PADEGA. Reply

tyagi
27, 2010 at 2:17

u bloody mo**********g, Bas***d, Reply

kumar vibhanshu
3, 2011 at 12:42

BRO ITS TIME TO WAKE UPO RAJNI IS STILL NOT IN MADAM TUSSADES WAX COLLECTION AND WHOM U ARE TALKING ABOUT THE ONLY ACTOR IN SOUTH IS KAMAL HASSNA HIS ACTION AND ACTING BOTH HAS SOME SENSE NOT LIKE RAJNI ALL FOOLISH THINGS HE CAN DO AND NOT HAS EVEN DECENT FAN FOLLOWING AMITABH AND SHAHRUKH HAS GOT SOME STATURE AT SUCH AN AGE AND ARE UNIVERSALLY ACCLAIMED NOT LIKE RAJNI WHO LOCALLY ACCLAIMED GREAT ACTOR!!!!!

Reply

Rajnikanth
14, 2011 at 2:52

Fuck u Reply

TVA
19, 2011 at 10:08

U R DIVIDING IT WITH WORDS. Reply

kishor dev
22, 2011 at 5:41

I feel sorry for you south indians having such poor test. No nobel person & having some brain can like Rajnikant. What foreginers must be thinking about India for such madness in movies. Anyway, Rajnikant has given us timepass. Reply

24. SUNNY
24, 2010 at 9:49

1)ONCE HANUMAANJI WERE CAUGHT READING RAJNIKANTH CHALISA.. 2)WHAT DOES THE GOD EXCLAIM WHEN HE IS SHOCKED???? OH MY RAJNIKANTH 3) RAJNI KNOWS WHO LET THE DOGS OUT MIND YIT. Reply

25. ARUN
24, 2010 at 11:43

RAJNI KNOWS WHO THE FUK IS ALICE

Reply

26. Nandan
25, 2010 at 7:08

There is no such word as IMPOSSIBLE in Rajnis Sir dictionary. Reply

27. abhay pandey

25, 2010 at 2:19

Once Rajinikant on hot seat of KBC And computer needed a lifeline to choose the questions Reply

28. RAJ
25, 2010 at 5:07

new movie for ranjanikath 3 RASCALAS. instead of jahanpanna..tohfa kabul ho dialogs will be enna rascela mind ith. Reply

29. RAJ
25, 2010 at 5:08

WHY RAJANIKANTH IS ALWAYS INVOLVED IN THESE KIND OF ACTIVITIES? Reply

30. Sanjay
26, 2010 at 12:45

Once Rajnikanth participated in 100 mtrs race. Obvious he won but, Einstein Died after watching his race because . . . . . . . . Light came second !! Reply

31. Pooja
27, 2010 at 8:28

Thanx a lot guys..u ppl made my dayEinstein one was awesomeI love Rajni sir. Reply

32. Saif Ali

27, 2010 at 11:51

jajajajjajajhahaha Reply

33. nitanth1@gmail.com
28, 2010 at 1:22

rajnikant showed middle finger to a girl n she ws pregnant.lmao Reply

hari
25, 2010 at 1:23

Reply

34. Ankur Agrawal

3, 2010 at 11:43

This is truely hillarious!!! A complete collection of logical & myths around big R Reply

archie
20, 2011 at 6:29

hey ankit who said these are myths hehehehe:) Reply

35. Divy Ranjan

4, 2010 at 8:11

once there was a massive accident between a cycle and a train. The train was destructed.Why??? . . . . . . . . Coz RAJANIKANTH was Sitting on the cycle Reply

36. ajay menghani

5, 2010 at 12:04

great.. bro.. its hilarious.. i just got down from the chair Reply

37. jamal
8, 2010 at 10:05

these jokes are hilarious , please continue. Reply

38. Akash
8, 2010 at 5:27

rajni sir you are like a god Reply

39. Avinash
8, 2010 at 8:59

Friends after 100 years Guess wat will b d years called? . . .. . . A.R. and B.R. (After RajiniKanth and Before RajiniKanth) Reply

40. hrrrrrrr
9, 2010 at 6:15

awsome jokes .:D i love rajanikanth Reply

41. Babu
9, 2010 at 6:36

Get the film street journal magazine to read the awesome interview of Rajnikant. Available at Oxford, Crossword and Landmark Reply

42. Tito Dutta

9, 2010 at 11:11

Rajanikanth can access his Facebook account without any email id, mobile number and password. Reply

43. jacky
10, 2010 at 7:06

because facebook server managed by rajnikant Reply

44. Sachin Patel

10, 2010 at 5:43

Only Rajnikanth can punised Aparichit Reply

45. SASWAT
10, 2010 at 10:30

ATTENTION : It is notify toall INDIANS that on new year 1/1/2011 the electric powercut will occour in all over nation for 12 hours. Why..????? coz RAJANIKANT will be charging his battery on that time.. Reply

46. SASWAT
10, 2010 at 10:43

Once Hritik Roshan & RAJANIKANT participate in DANCE compition. at d end result Hritik suffers in GUZARIS film Reply

47. Tamilian
15, 2010 at 4:12

There is nothing to rave about this. These jokes are simply lifted from Chuck Norris Facts and replaced the Chuck Norris name with Rajnikanth. Shame on you Reply

48. Rajnikanth
15, 2010 at 11:27

I am Rajnikanth and I have no problem with this blog! Who the hell has guts to compare me with Chuck Norris??? Reply

gajnikanth
14, 2011 at 3:46

hi son i m ur father gajnikanth. Reply

49. Anti-Tamilian
15, 2010 at 11:30

You Mr(Or MRS) Tamilian! yahhh its obvious you dont have a sense of humourjust chill out or go take a hikeoh wait..ur lungi might come in the way of you walkingohh boo hoo..someone stole the jokes from chuck Norrisgo break a coconut on ur head dude! Reply

lokesh
7, 2011 at 5:22

coconut line was too cool Reply

50. rishabh
15, 2010 at 6:47

once a mosquito bitten rajni so guess wht happened???.. mosquito suffered frm dengue Reply

51. rishabh
15, 2010 at 6:49

rajni can straighten a dogs tail:) Reply

52. rishu
15, 2010 at 6:53

why munni got badnaam?????? coz munna was rajnikanth:) Reply

53. Pankaj Mhatre

16, 2010 at 5:29

Latest 2 news RAJNIKANTH completd NFS MoST WANTDWid CYCLE.. Today Ek Train Cycle Ki Chapet Me aayi.. Train Me sawaar Sabhi Log Maare Gaye.. Cycle Driver RAJNIKANT Farrar Reply

54. Pankaj Kumar

 17, 2010 at 5:33

twitter following rajanikant Reply

55. sanaya
17, 2010 at 12:49

very few ppl knw tht the filming of jurassi park was done in ajnikanths underwear.!sry sir Reply

56. sanaya
17, 2010 at 12:50

gr8 jokes i cnt control myself laughingLOL! Reply

57. Kinshuk
17, 2010 at 9:17

Grt post guys.keep posting. Reply

58. Kinshuk
17, 2010 at 9:19

Once a girl loose her virginity..rajnikant brought her back Long live Rajnikant. Reply

59. rrr
18, 2010 at 8:18

nw whts the use he should have checked the dictionary first before buying it he shukd hav bought aone wid the word impossile Reply

60. pramod
18, 2010 at 11:22

When ranjnikanth is Driving Car on the road ,all signals on road get automatic Green for him ,and Red for all others Reply

61. pramod
18, 2010 at 11:25

Rajnikant Never Drive the Car on road ,He just sit inside the car and Road takes his car to the destination Reply

62. pramod
18, 2010 at 11:29

Why ArmStrong was jumping on MOON when he land first time ?.. . . . . . Because he saw Ranjnikant and his children were playing Cricket on MOON Reply

63. pramod
18, 2010 at 11:35

IN Life Every one has to adjust as per the Enviroment, but Enviroment get adjust ,where ever rajnikant goes Reply

64. pramod
18, 2010 at 11:38

Rajnikant never open any website on Browser ,Browser open the website for Him Reply

65. pramod
18, 2010 at 11:40

Rajnikant has his own satellite revolving around the earth for his own mobile service Reply

66. pramod
18, 2010 at 11:45

RAjnikant never user ATM card ,he just put the finger in ATM machine and get the amount what he want. Reply

67. pramod
18, 2010 at 11:48

LOVEGURUS Guru is Rajnikant Reply

68. pramod
18, 2010 at 11:52

If Salman Khan not geting any Offer for New pictures in BollyHood, He meets Rajnikant and pray him to get the new picture Reply

69. pramod
18, 2010 at 11:54

Whle Signing any new Picture in Bollywood,AMIR KHAN first discuss with rajnikant & if he says go ahead then only he signs Reply

70. pramod
19, 2010 at 12:01

GOD IS EVERY WHERE & EVERY WHERE IS RAJNIKANTH Reply

71. pramod
19, 2010 at 12:07

SHOLAY SCENE. . . . . GABAR Says : Kitne ADMI Thai Kaliya Says: Rajnikant Sarkar GABAR :GABAR left Ramgad with his army Reply

72. ashish
22, 2010 at 2:21

RAJNIKANTH once farted, today we know it as Rajnigandha Reply

73. dheeraj
24, 2010 at 11:53

bill getes-mera ghar itna bada hai ki ander local train chalti hai. rajni-mera ghar itna bada hai ki ghar me call karne k leya kone me chale jao to roaming lagta hai. Reply

74. dheeraj
24, 2010 at 11:56

rajnikanth boom se aagerbetti jalata hai.

Reply

75. rajini fan

27, 2010 at 2:52

awwsome jokes buddies, keep on posting as many jokes as you can on rajini sir THE GREAT. Reply

76. rajini fan

27, 2010 at 2:55

Rajnikanth added facebook as his friend. Reply

77. rajini fan

27, 2010 at 2:56

Rajnikant was born on 30th february.. Since then february decided not to give this date to anyone else. Reply

78. rajini fan

27, 2010 at 2:57

Once Rajnikant and a small girl were playing cards. Rajni loses the game inspite having 3 ACES. Why?? Because The girl had 3 RAJNIKANTS Reply

asmita
21, 2011 at 2:00

superb cool one Reply

79. rajini fan

27, 2010 at 2:57

these are sme of mine, hws that!!!! Reply

80. jitu
27, 2010 at 5:22

hi Reply

81. Dheeraj Joshi

28, 2010 at 6:54

Really Nice Quotes Reply

82. Mayank Chauhan

28, 2010 at 8:49

Once a rajnikant gave MBA Exam Paper nd wht happend in his result u know ??? He was . .. . .. Failed Chodya MBA to mazakni cheez 6 !!!!! Reply

83. Amit
3, 2011 at 9:02

Rajnikanth Killed Undertaker Thats why people call him deadman

Reply

84. fazeel
5, 2011 at 5:23

Nokia is xpected 2 launch Nokia R-1. Rajani Series in this year with 10 sims at a tim. 500GB memry 320M.pixels camera TV, fridge, AC, Car in one mobil fone Reply

85. faji
5, 2011 at 5:26

Once upon a tim Rajanikant used tooth powder 2 et strong teeth . . . . . . 2day dat powder is known as Ambuja Cements Reply

86. giri
6, 2011 at 2:02

wow its tooo good yaar Reply

87. faji
6, 2011 at 2:27

The death of Micheal jackson is revealed . . . The day before he died He saw Rajanikanths Dance And he got shocked . . . . . .

. Because rajani had performed SUN WALK Reply

88. faji
6, 2011 at 2:29

CAT is outdated. Now the students have to prepare for RAT. . . . . Wondering what it is? . . . . RAJNIKANTH APTITUDE TEST Reply

89. Addy
6, 2011 at 8:41

Once rajni was shaking his cock and he spilled his cum on a building and the building is known as the white house Reply

90. rahul
6, 2011 at 11:25

cool Reply

91. rajnikantjokes
7, 2011 at 9:15

1) Rajnikanths dog house has a signboard on it saying. . . . . . . . . Beware of Rajnikant!! 2) Rajnis wish agle janam mohe bitiya hi kijo. 3)Who can stop 100 cars with one hand? . . .

. . . . . Ans- Its Traffic police Not Rajnkant. LOL More at: Best Rajnikanth Jokes Reply

92. ek
10, 2011 at 9:47

hi Reply

93. ek
10, 2011 at 9:52

when Amithabh bachan opened his eyes the sun startes shining into the earth. when sharuk khan jumped the earthquake occured. Reply

94. shubhankar
17, 2011 at 1:42

once rajnikantha showed middlefinger to a women . . . . and the women became pragnent. Reply

95. seema
17, 2011 at 1:47

the flim anaconda was shot inside rajnikanthas pant Reply

 sathish
2, 2011 at 11:28

dai seema baaaaaduuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu Reply

96. neel
18, 2011 at 9:15

# Rajani Sir holds the bullet and fires the gun , the gun flies and kills 100 villains # Rajani sir can make maggie in 2 secs!!!! # Time waits for Rajani sirs approval to start. # Rajani sir has I FINGER ,he uses any flat surface to browse internet and read these jokes. # Only Rajani sir can create or destroy energy !!! # We all know Rajani sir can split a bullet in two with a blade , but did you know he can split a blade in two with his beard hair !!!! # When Rajani sir snaps his one side finger the sound travels around the earth and is heard by his other side ear. # Rajani sir can capture light and separate the colour from white using bare hands. # Santa Banta committed suicide in fear of loosing ,after they came to know that Rajani sir has joined the joke race.. # Rajani sirs enemys are so afraid that they never sleep , cos they know he can kill them in dreams too.

# Rajaini sirs joke a day keeps doctor away SUPERHIT FLIMS DID NOT MADE HIM A SUPERSTAR , HE ACTED IN THOSE FLIMS SO THEY BECAME SUPERHIT.. Reply

97. kannu
20, 2011 at 7:38

kon hai yee bahanchood Rajnikant.Sala esi and sand moviee kyoo banata hai????? Reply

98. shekhu
27, 2011 at 6:52

once rajnikanath read all the jokes published on internet and the nexr day he warns evry user on internet . stop publishing jokes about me on internet else i will delete the internet Rajnikanth Rocks !!! ahahahaha Reply

99. Kalimpong (Hill Boy)

29, 2011 at 11:42

Da Combo PackSanta Banta, C.I.D. Team & Rajnikant were walking through a desert, Suddenly, out of nowhere, they see a huge sandstrom coming, Santa: Oye Banta, tufaan! Banta: Santa, apun toh marenge ab! ACP Pradyuman: Daya jara Pata lagao ye hamare rasste mein rukawat ayi to ayi kaha se? Daya: Sir, na yaha darwaza hai jisse todke hum bhaag sake na tufaan ko mein thappad maar sakta hu . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . RAJNIKANT: Sorry for Sneezing Reply

100. xyz
30, 2011 at 10:03

Once while sleeping rajni was uttering some numbers. the collection, today is known as log table! Reply

101. xyz
30, 2011 at 10:08

Rajnikanth can clap with one hand Reply

102. xyz
30, 2011 at 10:14

Once rajnikanth fought with superman to determine the stronger of the two, with the bet that the loser will wear his undies over pants for the rest of his life Reply

103. Hriday
30, 2011 at 11:36

Rajnikanth can move the clock in anti-clockwise direction.. Reply

104. Siddharth Surana

5, 2011 at 6:43

Once RAJNIKANTH was crossing a highway when suddenly a 32 wheeler lorry banged against him with full force! . . .and the conclusion . . We all now know that lorry as . . TATA NANO yenna rascalla?? Mind it !! Reply

105. Rajanakantha
7, 2011 at 12:26

Kya gande wale aand gul hue tumhari landi si baate padhkar Reply

106.

Manish Rana
9, 2011 at 12:50

Roadies 9 Audition of Raghu, Rajiv & Ranvijay taken by Rajnikanth Yanaa Rascala, Mind it. Reply

107. yennarascala@rajni.com
19, 2011 at 9:13

If Rajnikant was born 100 years earlier, British would have fought to get independence from India. When Rajnikant logs on to facebook.com, facebook updates its status message! Rajnikanth once wrote a cheque, the bank bounced! Rajnikanth hears sign language When do earthquakes occur? When Rajnikanths mobile is on vibration mode! Rajnikanth woke up one day and decided he would share one percent of his knowledge with the world. Thus,google was born! Once a Rajnis photo was placed for Xerox Guess What Happened? We Had 2 XEROX MACHINES This msg. is being sent in the intrest of humanity- plz stop making jokes on rajnikant or else he will delete the forward option....;-) Reply

108. abhi
25, 2011 at 5:17

Barish hui aur bheeg gaye hum.. wah wah Barish hui aur bheeg gaye hum wah wah Aage kya hua? Hona kya tha, Rajnikant ne phoonk mari, Aur sukh gaye hum!! Reply

109. zee
25, 2011 at 4:15

More moRe gimme more http://zeeis.me/new-rajnikanth-jokes/ Reply

110. hhjhjj

 3, 2011 at 4:13

look at binscorner.com and search for rajinikant Reply

111. vikram
6, 2011 at 11:59

more amazing rajnikanth jokes http://bit.ly/aIuQCY Reply

112. b k gangte
12, 2011 at 4:20

When Neil Armstrong landed on the moon, he was welcome by Rajnikanth who said hello, Armstrong Reply

113. b k gangte
12, 2011 at 4:29

Rajnikanth can drive a car at a speed of 120 km/h in neutral gear. Reply

114. gopal bitode

12, 2011 at 2:24

Rajnikanth sir you must work in Marathi films Reply

115.: Coolest List of Rajnikanth Jokes Rajnikanth Jokes 2011 | Funny SMS Jokes India

116. captainportal.com
29, 2011 at 8:31

nice jokes , it look real rajnikanth is the real super star of INDIA. ALL THE BEST Reply

117. sreekanth
1, 2011 at 5:33

those who are making jokes about rajnikanth are real bitch suckers.. he is giving more than his 60% profit to orphanage and to poor people! those who knows tamil and against our rajni, it is for you! ommala naaaye suutha nakki , amithabathan poola vumbi vankada Reply

kaustubh
17, 2011 at 11:10

I am not south indian, but i am still his good fan. These jokes people make bcoz of his stunts shown in his film which no actor has committed. Reply

kaustubh
17, 2011 at 11:11

his robot film was awesome Reply

sreekanth
22, 2011 at 6:31

Robo is one of best in south indian history sharuk copied that film named as RAA-1 I accept sharuk was a great actor, but he cant stand be4 rajini. He is 61 old but you cant identify from his performance!!!! he rocks!!!!!!!1 Reply

118. ragu
1, 2011 at 5:35

correct da machi. apdiye rajni maapla poolayum vumba solidu Reply

119. sathish
1, 2011 at 5:37

ayaee maplaki pool sinathuda entha vumba sollalam. enthu anogonda maari Reply

120. sachin
7, 2011 at 6:23

only 2 word fuck off.!! Reply

121. sachin
7, 2011 at 6:25

Only 2 words fuck off all south indians!! Reply

parvathimuthu
22, 2011 at 6:28

fuck off south indians???? you meant it???? funny ya otha baadu. hi sachin you fuck all the ass of south indian and say whether its hot or not!!!! You dnt know abt me!!! don of south indian!!!! Muthu Parvathi muthu. real terror head of rajini fan club. I ll track your ip address soon!!!! fuck off idiot. Reply

Karthik(helmet)
6, 2011 at 5:31

2 word for south india???? ok.. for north indian ommala thuuma vandhu enka elaru pooola vumbitu pooda (Dnt u understand) here the translation for sachine thevdiya Bastard Come and fuck all the south indian dicks. and get money from the great hero dhanusssh. If u find his pool and vumbify u ll paid twice Happya???? thank u thevdiya sachin thuuma!!! Reply

122. viv
20, 2011 at 4:11

Rajnikant has got great regards for his charity and simple down to earth life style. But you dont like cartoons when you grow up. similarly you just laugh on cheap actions done in south Indian movies but many crazy guys cling to these false actions and get emotional. rajnikant once gained weight and is avoiding travelling in air. Reason He fears sky will fall down on us. Reply

123. deva
23, 2011 at 6:15

efjhsd Reply

124. Derivative.
5, 2011 at 6:56

Funny, yes. But it isnt that funny when you have already read all of them since they were Chuck Norris jokes. I do like a few for their original content, but most of them are just Chuck Norris jokes Reply

125. gaurav
10, 2011 at 9:09

hi rajnikanth how are you now Reply

126. aman
19, 2011 at 1:23

rajni asks sambhar at mc donalds and guess wt he get it Reply

Parvathi muthu (rajini's keep)

6, 2011 at 5:27

he will get wat he asked but if u ask it u ll get his shit(which has been dropped before 15 days) Reply

127. Puku
10, 2011 at 5:56

India in 20-20 final against Australlia. 1 ball 24 runs required. Rajini batting. Bowler bowls and Rajini hits. Ball goes up in the air, breaks up into 6 parts and each part sails over the boundary rope. India wins by 12 runs. Reply

128. Puku
10, 2011 at 6:08

A new TV serial is being actively demanded from Tamil Nadu. BAL RAJINI. Reply

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Before you watch Robots, Know this about Rajnikant
October 5th, 2010 Submitted by Punjabiportal 168,132 views

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Some facts about Rajnikant from his films: 1. Rajnikant has a Brain Tumor which, according to the doctors cant be cured and his death is imminent. In one of the fights, our great Rajnikant is shot in the head. To everybodys surprise, the bullet passes through his ears taking away the tumor along with it and he is cured! Long Live Rajnikant! 2. In another movie, Rajnikant is confronted with 3 gangsters. Rajnikant has a gun but unfortunately only one bullet and a knife. He throws the knife at the middle gangster & shoots the bullet towards the knife. The knife cuts the bullet into 2 pieces, which kills both the gangsters on each side of the middle gangster & the knife kills the middle one.

3. Rajnikant is chased by a gangster. Rajnikant has a revolver but no bullets in it. Rajnikant waits for the gangster to shoot. As soon as the gangster shoots, Rajnikant opens the bullet compartment of his revolver and catches the bullet. Then, he closes the bullet compartment and fires his gun. Bang the gangster dies 4. Rajnikant gets to know that the villain is on the other side of a very high wall. Rajnikant has to desperately kill the villain because its the climax. Rajnikant suddenly pulls two guns from his pockets. He throws one gun in the air and when the gun has reached above the height of the wall, he uses the second gun and shoots at the trigger of the first gun in air. The first gun fires off and the villain is dead.

Make sure to check the funny Rajnikant Funny Advertisements Here

Punjabiportal Facts of Rajnikant 1. Everytime you see Internal Server Errors on PP, its Rajnikant trying to join PP. PP shuts itself down in fear. 2. Everything Punjabiportal has been so far was actually done to publish this article in praises of Rajnikant. Members can suggest more facts about Rajnikant and punjabiportal.com and submit it in comments. We will add them with your name in this article. Facts submitted by the readers of this article: 1. Rajnikant can make calls from his iPod to his iPad!!! - by Ketan Raiyani 2. Once Rajnikaant signed a cheque and the Bank bounced!!! - by Ankit Shukla 3. Once Death had near Rajnikant experience !! - by Ankit Shukla 4. When GOD is shocked he exclaims Oh my Rajnikaant! - by Ankit Shukla 5. Great mystery solved : the missing piece of apple in Apples Logo was eaten by Rajnikant!! - by Ankit Shukla 6. The world is not ending in 2012. Rajnikant just bought a laptop with 3 yrs warranty!! - by Ankit Shukla 7. Rajnikant knows the exact value of Pi upto a Googol- by TJ 8. Rajnikant knows what came first, chicken or egg!! - by TJ 9. Rajnikant once won an argument with his wife. - by Vivek Singhania 10. There in nothing RajiniKant do. - by Pras 11. Rajnikanths nxt project. Titanic in Tamil. Climax revised. Both survive. Rajnikant swims across the Atlantic Ocean with heroine in one hand and Titanic in the other. by Sourav Ghosh 12. Neo was the one Rajinikant is the only one - by Pras 13. Superman once got into a fight with Rajnikanth. The loser had to wear his underwear over his pants. - by Rajini

14. Intels new caption Rajnikant Inside. - by Prabh 15. Rajanikanth can do a wheelie on a unicycle. - by Abbas 16. Rajini doesnt need water supply. Hydrogen and Oxygen merge at the sight of him and produce water whenever he wants. by Abbas

17. All of the theories on Dinosaur Extinction are wrong. Rajnikant simply stomped his foot and they all died. - by Abbas 18. If Rajnikant gets into a car accident (yeah right) His car will need some airbags to protect it from him. - by Abbas 19. Contrary to popular belief, Rajnikant cannot fly. He just jumps and chooses when to come down. - by Abbas 20. Some magicans can walk on water, Rajnikant can swim through land. - by Abbas 21. If Rajnikant ever got caught for speeding, hed let the cops off with a warning. - by Abbas 22. Rajnikant can light a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together. - by Abbas 23. Rajnikant runs until the treadmill gets tired - by Abbas 24. Rajnikant irons his Pants with them still on. - by Abbas 25. Rajnikant can squeeze orange juice from a banana - by Abbas 26. In the back of the book of world records, it says All records are held by Rajnikant. The ones listed are in second place. - by Abbas 27. Rajnikant can tie his shoes with his feet. - by Abbas 28. The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Rajnikant out. It failed miserably. - by Abbas 29. Basketball player: I can spin a ball on my finger for 2 hrs can u..?? - by Abbas Rajnikanth: enna rascala How do u think the earth spins?? :) mind it! - by siva 30. In an wild argument, rajnikant showd a middle finger to his GFn she gt pregnant !!! - by siva 31. 1000 yrs from now..robots will make movie named Rajanikant - by siva 32.Paul The Octopus was asked to predict when would Rajnikant Die .. R.I.P PAUL !!!! - by Nikhil 33. Rajnikanth once entered a race he came first, second and third. by Arpit Rathi 34. Rajnikanth added facebook as his friend. - by Arpit Rathi 35. Once Rajnikant was caught on the highway for over speeding while walking - by Arpit Rathi 36. Rajnikant once wrote his autobiography. Today that book is known as Guiness book of world RECORDS. - by Arpit Rathi

37. Once Rajnikant taught a kid how to open a door without ringing d bell. Today that child is know as CID inspector DAYA. by Arpit Rathi 38. Once Rajnikant mumbled some numbers in his sleep. Those numbers are today collectively known as the LOG TABLE. - by Nikhil 39.When Rajnikanth was a kid he made his mom eat her vegetables! by Harvinder Singh Gill 40. The oceans are filled with tears of Rajnikanths victims. by Harvinder Singh Gill 41. The Punjabi singer Pooja was at one time married but then Rajnikanth started to have a crush on her and now shes Miss Pooja. by Harvinder Singh Gill 42. The only reason ShahRukh Khan stuttered in the movie Darr is because he saw Rajnikanth behind Juhi Chawla!! by Harvinder Singh Gill 43. The movie Krrish is loosely based on Rajnikanths life. by Harvinder Singh Gill 44. Gandhis non violence movement REALLY pissed Rajnikanth off. by Harvinder Singh Gill 45. India actually didnt have 50,000 crores for organizing the Commonwealth games Rajnikanth gave it to them! by Harvinder Singh Gill 46. An email was sent from Pune to Mumbai Rajnikant stopped it in Lonawala. - by Nikhil 47. Rajnikant Bcom Accounting Answr Paper is Termed as ACCOUNTING STANDARDS - by Nikhil 48. Once Rajnikant participated in Bike race. Dont even try 2 guess wat happened. Rajnikant won d race on Neutral gear. Mind it anna.. - by Nikhil 49. Once Rajnikant lost his Wallet. Since then The World is Facing Recession - by Nikhil 50. Rajnikanth once threw a coin in disgust at a black beggar, the beggar is now known as 50 Cent - by Nikhil

51. Newton gave us just the three dumb laws of motion. Rajinikanth has already given us 33,945 laws of commotion and the count is far from completed. - by John Cena D-X 52. Rajinikanth is a vegetarian. Meaning, he does not eat animals until first he puts them into vegetative state with his fists. - by John Cena D-X 53. Raincoats were developed to prevent raindrops from getting electrocuted on coming within 100 metres of Rajinikanth. (Gap10 fans, excuse) - by John Cena D-X 54. Thousands of years ago Rajinikanth came across a bear. It was so terrified that it fled north into the arctic. It was also so terrified that all of its descendents now have white hair. - by John Cena D-X 55. The movie 300 was initially planned to be made with Rajinikanth. It was originally named 1. - by John Cena D-X

56. We face earthquakes only when Rajnikanth plays skipping. - by Sushil 57. Once Rajnikanth was on Hot Seat of KBC and Computer needed Lifeline to Choose the question. - by Manish 58. Once Rajni was having sex in a Fiat . A sperm escaped and entered the engine of the car that car is now called Ferrari. by Agn 59. If Rajinikanths PC hangs, its time for the next Windows release by Microsoft. - by Harkirat 60. Rajnikanth gargles with Frag Grenads. - by Pratik Raval 61. There used to be a street named after Rajnikanth, but it was changed because nobody crosses Rajnikanth and lives. by Pratik Raval 62. Rajnikanth was supposed to play the lead role in Mission: Impossible. He was replaced by Tom Cruise because the tittle wouldnt make any sense. by Pratik Raval 63. Rajnikanth can run you over with a parked car. by Pratik Raval 64. Rajnikanth can whistle in five different languages, including sign language - by Pratik Raval 65. Rajnikanth can sneeze with his eyes open. - by Pratik Raval 66. Once, Rajnikanth told Nike to just do it and it did. - by Pratik Raval 67. If 12/21/2012 is the end of the world, it means that Rajnikanth got bored with humanity - by Pratik Raval 68. A new Nostradamus prophecy has been uncovered. Armageddon & Rajnikanth are one and the same. - by Pratik Raval 69. Lifetime Warranties do not exist because of Rajnikanth. by Pratik Raval 70. Rajnikanth doesnt have bad days. Bad days have Rajnikanth - by Pratik Raval 71. Rajnikanth has nicknames for his feet Hiroshima and Nagaski. - by Pratik Raval 72. When Rajnikanth was born, the only person crying was the doctor. You NEVER slap Rajnikanth. - by Pratik Raval 73. Rajnikanth puts his pants on two legs at a time. - by Pratik Raval 74. Rajnikanth CAN read Lady Gagas poker face. by Pratik Raval 75. Two ghosts were talking.. One consoled other Dont fear brother.. there is nothing like Rajnikant by Gaurav Sharma 76. Once Bill Gates went to Rajnikant. For what? To ask for DVD of Windows 8. by Aaruni Parimal 77. No one can wish a happy birthday to Rajjnikanth cause he was here before time existed by Mrugesh 78. i have got so many rajnikanth jokes on my mobile phone..dat i dont require a charger now:) - by Neeraj 79. Rajnikant got admission in medical profession. And gave viva exam. In the end he asked the examiner to come back after preparation. - by Sandeep 80. Rajnikants daughter lost her virginity. Rajnikant found it and gave it back to her !!! - by ssumanth 81. Rajnikant was born on 30th february.. Since then february decided not to give this date to anyone else..!! Mind it.. - by Sandeep

82. If ever you want to pinch Rajnikant,The best thing you can do is launch a missile at him. by Arun Prasad 83. Once Rajnikant and a small girl were playing cards. Rajni loses the game inspite having 3 ACES. Why?? Because The girl had 3 RAJNIKANTS!!! - by Sandeep 84. Well, this one will be understood well by medical persons. Once acute renal failure patient comes to RAJNIKANT. After getting bored of his complaints, RAJNIKANT just says sssshhhuu and kidney starts functioning. - by Sandeep 85. Rajni in Tamil remake of Aamirs Ghulam. Rajni runs on railway track, the train is now at a distance of 1 mtr. Now what? Obviously The train jumps off the track. - by Sandeep 86. Even gajani remembers rajni. - by Sandeep 87. This years RAJNIKANT award goes to Oscar - by Sandeep 88. Graham Bell ne lamppost ke neeche padhai ki.. Rabindranath Tagore ne laalten mein padhai ki. Einstein ne doosre logo ki khidki se aati thodi si roshni mein padhai ki. Aur Rajnikanth ne Agarbatti mein :) -by GGJJ 89. Grammatical thinking:Those think in universe in one we start with THE. like THE sun. so not call rajni call THE rajnikant. - by @nk!t 90. Why Osama isnt caught? Well!! Rajnikanth isnt interested. - by nihilist 91. Even wildest of animals get goosebumps at the sight of Rajnikanth. Porcupines find him even scary. - by nihilist 92. Once Rajnikant participated in 100 meter running race. Dont even try 2 guess wat happened. Rajnikant won the race. Seeing this Einstein committed suicide . do U know why. Coz light came third, but who came 2nd Rajnikants shadow. - by Sandeep 93. One day Rajnikanth bunked school, now its known as Sunday. by dollysandhu 94. The newly got symbol for the rupee is actually Rajnikhants signature. -by Nikhil_The_One 95. Rajnikanth cannot work in a BPO (Business Process Outsourcing) Why??? because he himself is a process. - by RupamChowdhury 96. My laptop is now totally safe from trojans and virus I just installed RAJNIKANTH Antivirus in my system !! - by Manish 97. Gf: Mera koi picha karte rehta hai Rajni: ok.. Nxt day Gf: Hey where the hell is My Shadow???? - by Ali 98. When rajnikanth dies, the grave doesnt read RIP, it reads BRB - by Zain 99. World cup 2011 Grouping: Group A: AUS,PAK,SL,NZ,ZIM,CANADA,KENYA,IND,SA,ENG,WI BAN,IRL and NETHERLAND Group B: RAJNIKANTH. - by Ali

100. Rajnikanth got inspired by Superman , Batman and Hanuman and wanted to beat them all in a single shot so he wore underwear over lungi , grew a tail to his back and wore a bedsheet behind him. by Bhanupriya 101. Rajnikanths postal address: Rajnikanth , Madras - by Dholak 102. Rajanikanth can eat lunch before breakfast. - by Me 103. Rajanikanth is the only person to have got nobel prize in acting. - by Me 104. When Pope walks with Rajanikanth, People ask Who is that guy in robe? - by Me 105. Laughing Budha is the Japanese guy whom Rajni told a joke in childhood. - by Aditya 106. No one is perfect, Rajnikant is no one by Yukta 107. Rajnikanth, it seems is a verb and not a noun. Its the continuous process happening inside and around us. - by Harsh 108. The Indian Government has requested Rajnikanth to restrict importing Bullet trains from China for using them as cartridges in his pistol - by Harsh 109. Rajnikant is lovin it! Macdonalds new tagline - by Harsh 110. Rajnikanth swaps his visitng cards at ATMs to get cash - by Harsh 111. Once rajni sent an sms to Einstein . It read E=MC2 - by Harsh 112. Corporate Slogans as they should be: Impossible is Rajnikanth Adidas The car in front is Rajnis Toyota. Rajnikanth at Work General Electric (GE) I am Rajnikanth! What? Rajnikanth I am Reebok Connecting Rajnikanth Nokia Hello Rajnikanth Motorola Express Rajnikanth Airtel Cellular Service India A Rajnikanth can change your life Idea Cellular India Do you rajnikanth!? Yahoo High Performance, Delivered Accenture for Rajnikanth Republic of Rajnikanth - by Dr Sunil 113. Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what rajnikanth can do for your country.- by Dr Sunil 114. Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love with rajnikanth.- by Dr Sunil

115. One night at 2AM in the morning Rajni gets a phone call saying, Congratulation Rajnikant you have won the Noble Peace prize and an all expence paid trip to Bangkok. Rajni puts the phone down, Mrs Rajnikant asks who was it. Rajni replies. Some bloody telemarketing guy- by Dr Sunil 116. By the time Grahambell invented telephone, he had 2missed calls from Rajnikanth. by gau 117. Aishwairya rai to rajnikant: ek chutki sindhoor ki kimat tum kya jaano rajni babu??? Rajnikant: 0.000000078650000123478956 grams - by Akshay B 118. Once a boy went to xerox Rajnikants photograph. The xerox machined got copied twice - by Dattaraya 119. When Rajnikant signs in at Facebook, Facebook updates its status. - by kundan 120. Anhoni ko honi karde honi ko anhoni, ek jagah jab Jama ho teeno RAJNI , GAJANI aur DHONI. Congrets team India for winning the cricket world cup. - by Sandeep 121. Once it was extreamly clowdy in china. then they found out that it was rajni who was smoking from india. -by Rohini 122. Rajni was shot with a bullet. The next day it was the bullets funeral. -by Rohini 123. Alfred Nobel recieved the Rajnikant Award! - by RNB 124. Once Rajnikant participated in 100m race, obviously he came 1st. But Einstein died after noticing that Light came 2nd..!! by chaitanya 125. Rajnikaants heartbeat is measured in richter scale. by Yusuf Abdullah 126. Even lord voldemort refers 2 Rajini as He who must not be named by Dinesh Rath 127. Once Rajnikant bought 4 acers of land and made 4 wells at each corner. People asked wht was he doing. He answerd that he wanted to play Carrom. - by Raj 128. Rajnikanth bought 2 elephants ,2 camels and 2 horses from the zoo. Why? To Play chess! - by Mahesh Pawar 129. Q: What did John Logie Baird found when he invented television? Ans: There is Rajnis movie already telecasting! - by Sampat 130. Rajnikant is really mad about people making sms jokes on him that he is thinking of deleting forward options from every phone. by Zing 131. Rajni knows whats cookin (Rock) - by DATTATRAYA

The Hollywood Facts of Rajnikant 1. Chuck Norris once met Rajinikanth. The result He was reduced to a joke on the internet. 2. Rajinikanth kills Harry Potter in the ninth book. 3. Rajinikanth calls Voldemort by his name. 4. Rajinikanth gave the Joker those scars. 5. Rajinikanth killed Spiderman using Baygon Anti Bug Spray. 6. Rajinikant electrocuted Iron Man. 7. To be or not to be? That is the question. The answer? Rajinikanth. 8. 10 actors have played the role of James Bond. No one has been able to enact Rajnikant THE REAL JAMES BOND. 9. Rocky never challanged the one man who can defeat him Rajnikant 10. Why do you think there are no superheroes in india. Simple no one can invade Rajnikants territory.

Rajnikant Vs the Computer World 1. Rajanikanth can delete the Recycling Bin. 2. Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Rajanikanths PC will crash. 3. Rajnikants email id is gmail@rajnikant.com 4. If you Google search Rajnikant getting kicked, you will generate zero results. It just doesnt happen. 5. Google wont find Rajinikanth because you dont find Rajinikanth; Rajinikanth finds you. 6. Rajinikanth can make PCs better than the Mac. 7. If you spell Rajanikanth wrong on Google it doesnt say, Did you mean Rajanikanth? It simply replies, Run while you still have the chance. 8. The only man who ever outsmarted Rajinikanth was Stephen Hawking, and he got what he deserved.

General facts about Rajnikant 1. Rajnikant has counted to infinity-twice. 2. When Rajnikant does pushups, he isnt lifting himself up, hes pushing the earth down. 3. Rajnikant doesnt wear a watch, he decides what time it is!! 4. Rajnikants house has no doors, only walls that he walks through. 5. The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Rajnikant kicked one of the corners off. 6. Rajnikant once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills, they just made him blink. 7. Rajnikants every step is a mini whirlwind. Hurricane Katrina was the result of his morning jog! 8. Where there is a will, theres a way. Where there is Rajnikant, there is no other way!! 9. There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Rajnikant lives in Chennai! 10. Rajanikanth can build a snowman. out of rain. 11. Rajanikanth can strangle you with a cordless phone. 12. Rajanikanth can drown a fish. 13. Rajanikanth can play the violin.on a piano. 14. When Rajanikanth enters a room, he doesnt turn the lights on .he turns the dark off. 15. Rajanikanth once had a heart attack. his heart lost. 16. Rajanikanth makes onions cry. 17. It takes Rajnikant 20 minutes to watch 60 minutes . 18. The only things that run faster and longer than Rajnikant are his films.

19. Ghosts are actually caused by Rajanikanth killing people faster than Death can process them. 20. When Rajanikanth looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid enough to get in between Rajanikanth and Rajanikanth. 21. Rajnikant gave Mona Lisa that smile. 22. Rajanikanth does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die. 23. Outer space exists because its afraid to be on the same planet with Rajnikant. 24. Rajnikant is so fast. He can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head. 25. A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Rajanikanth and that you will be handicapped if you park there. 26. Rajanikanth calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Rajanikanth. 27. Once a cobra bit Rajanikanth leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died. 28. When Rajanikanth gives you the finger, hes telling you how many seconds you have left to live. 29. Rajanikanth can kill two stones with one bird. 30. Rajanikanth was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop. 31. Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Rajanikanth can kill 100 percent of whatever he wants. 32. There is no such thing as global warming. Rajanikanth was cold, so he turned the sun up. 33. Rajanikanth can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night. 34. Rajanikanth has a deep and abiding respect for human life unless it gets in his way. 35. Rajanikanth once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, Bang! 36. In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Rajanikanth could use to kill you, including the room itself. 37. Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Rajanikanth. 38. Rajanikanth destroyed the periodic table, because Rajanikanth only recognizes the element of surprise. 39. Rajanikanth got his drivers license at the age of 16 Seconds. 40. With the rising cost of gasoline, Rajanikanth is beginning to worry about his drinking habit. 41. The square root of Rajanikanth is pain. Do not try to square Rajanikanth, the result is death. 42. When you say no ones perfect, Rajanikanth takes this as a personal insult. 43. Rajinikanth once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are today called giraffes. 44. Rajinikanth killed the Dead Sea. 45.. When Rajinikanth does push-ups, he isnt lifting himself up. He is pushing the earth down.

46. There is no such thing as evolution, its just a list of creatures that Rajinikanth allowed to live. 47. Rajnikanth can divide by zero. 48. Rajinikanth can win at Solitaire with only 18 cards. 49. Rajinikanth did in fact, build Rome in a day. 50. Rajinikanth never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself in fear.

51. Rajinikanth doesnt breathe. Air hides in his lungs for protection. 52. Words like awesomeness, brilliance, legendary etc. were added to the dictionary in the year 1949. That was the year Rajinikanth was born. 53. Rajinikanth does not own a stove, oven, or microwave, because revenge is a dish best served cold. 54. Rajinikanth has already been to Mars, thats why there are no signs of life there. 55. Rajinikanth doesnt move at the speed of light. Light moves at the speed of Rajinikanth. 56. Rajinikanth knows Victorias secret.

57. Water boils faster when Rajinikanth stares at it. 58. Rajinikanth got small pox when he was a kid. As a result small pox is now eradicated. 59. Rajinikanth leaves messages before the beep. 60. The last time Rajinikanth killed someone, he slapped himself to do it. The other guy just disintegrated. Resonance. 61. Rajinikanth can answer a missed call. 62. Rajinikanth doesnt need a visa to travel abroad, he just jumps from the tallest building in Chennai and holds himself in the air while the earth rotates. 63. Rajinikanths brain works faster than Chacha Chaudhurys. 64. Rajinikanth doesnt shower. He only takes blood baths. 65. Rajinikant can give pain to Painkillers and headache to Anacin. 66. Rajinikanth knows what women really want. 67. Time and tide wait for Rajinikanth. 68. Rajinikanth sneezed only once in his entire life, thats when the tsunami occurred in the Indian ocean. 69. As a child when Rajinikanth had dyslexia, he simply re-scripted the alphabet. 70. The quickest way to a mans heart is with Rajinikanths fist. 71. Rajinikanth puts the laughter in manslaughter. 72. Rajinikanth goes to court and sentences the judge. 73. Rajinikanth is a champion in the game Hide n seek, as no one can hide from Rajinikanth. 74. Rajinikant proves Newton wrong all the time. Every time he performs an action, he simply eliminates anything and everything that can provide the reaction. 75. Rajinikant is a weapon created by God to use on doomsday to end the world. 76. Aliens do indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Rajinikanth is on. 77. We live in an expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Rajinikanth. 78. If at first you dont succeed, youre not Rajinikanth. 79. When Rajinikanth plays Monopoly, it affects the actual world economy. 80. Rajinikanth is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

deecycle Bin.

5/14/2011

Facts abt superstar!

You want to know who Rajnikanth is. here are the facts 1. Rajnikanth makes onions cry 2. Rajnikanth can delete the Recycle Bin. 3. Ghosts are actually caused by Rajnikanth killing people faster than Death can process them. 4. Rajnikanth can build a snowmanout of rain. 5. Rajnikanth can strangle you with a cordless phone. 6. Rajnikanth can drown a fish. 7. When Rajnikanth enters a room, he doesnt turn the lights on, he turns the dark off. 8. When Rajnikanth looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid enough to get in between Rajnikanth and Rajnikanth. 9. Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards.Rajnikanth can throw Brett Favre even further. 10. The last digit of pi is Rajnikanth. He is the end of all things. 11. Rajnikanth does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die. 12. Bullets dodge Rajnikanth. 13. A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Rajnikanth and that you will be handicapped if you park there. 14. Rajnikanth calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Rajnikanth. 15. If you spell Rajnikanth wrong on Google it doesnt say, Did you mean Rajnikanth? It simply replies, Run while you still have the chance. 16. Rajnikanth can do a wheelie on a unicycle. 17. Once a cobra bit Rajnikanth leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died. 18. When Rajnikanth gives you the finger, hes telling you how many seconds you have left to live. 19. Rajnikanth can kill two stones with one bird. 20. Rajnikanth was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.

21. Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Rajnikanth can kill 100 percent of whatever he wants. 22. There is no such thing as global warming. Rajnikanth was cold, so he turned the sun up. 23. Rajnikanth can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night. 24. Rajnikanth has a deep and abiding respect for human life unless it gets in his way. 25. It takes Rajnikanth 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes. 26. Rajnikanth once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, Bang! 27. In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Rajnikanth could use to kill you, including the room itself. 28. Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Rajnikanth. 29. Rajnikanth destroyed the periodic table, because Rajnikanth only recognizes the element of surprise. 30. Rajnikanth got his drivers license at the age of 16 Seconds. 31. With the rising cost of gasoline, Rajnikanth is beginning to worry about his drinking habit. 32. The square root of Rajnikanth is pain. Do not try to square Rajnikanth, the result is death. 33. When you say no ones perfect, Rajnikanth takes this as a personal insult. 34. Rajnikanth taught Chuck Norris how to deliver roundhouse kicks. 35. Rajnikanth once roundhouse kicked a Tata truck in Chennai. It became the Tata Nano and fell on Mamata Banerjees head in Kolkata. 36. Rajnikanth reverses Court judgements by making the ink run back into the Judges ballpen. 37. Rajnikanth once boarded a Virgin Atlantic flight from Chennai to New York. The stewards served the tea cold. So when the flight finally touched down, it was just Atlantic. 38. Matrix was originally planned in Tamil with Rajnikanth as Rajnikanth. But the bullets were so shit scared that they pissed in the barrels and refused to come out of the guns in his presence. 39. Rajnikanth once went to Jim Corbett National Park. After eight straight hours of snapping pictures, the tired tigers ran out of camera film. 40. Rajnikanth doesnt need to sleep with a gun under his pillow. He is deadlier with the pillow.

41. The movie 300 was initially planned to be made with Rajnikanth. It was originally named 1. 42. Rajnikanth is so flexible, he can lick his elbow. 43. Hes also so smart; he knows youd try to do it after reading that. 44. Raincoats were developed to prevent raindrops from getting electrocuted on coming within 100 metres of Rajnikanth. 45. Rajnikanth has successfully reversed global warming. All the glaciers just froze when they heard his name. 46. Rajnikanth once dived into the sea from his Chennai condo. The next thing you know is that a tsunami has hit half the world. 47. The Chennai Delhi Rajdhani Express once missed Rajnikanth. It ran as fast as it could but failed to catch him. 48. Rajnikanth can kill 100 villains at a time just with his dialogues. 49. Viagra often needs Rajnikanth. 50. Newton gave us just the three dumb laws of motion. Rajnikanth has already given us 33,945 laws of commotion and the count is far from completed. 51. No one messes with Rajnikanth. Only Rajnikanth can mess with himself. 52. Sunny Deol once thrashed a battalion of Pakistanis with his bare hands. Rajnikanth can thrash 1000 such Sunny Deols with his bare tongue. 53. Parachutes were invented just to prevent the earth from getting shattered to pieces when hit by a falling Rajnikanth. 54. Only two things on earth are visible from space. Rajnikanth in his mundu and some wall in Africa. Or is that in China? 55. What colour is Rajnikanths blood? Haha! Trick question! Rajnikanth never bleeds!! 56. Rajnikanth is faster than email. He is now officially the second fastest thing in the Universe after MMS. 57. Rajnikanth uses pepper spray as eye drops. 58. Man proposes; Rajnikanth disposes. And disposes fast. 59. There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Rajnikanth has allowed to live. 60. Outer space exists because its afraid to be on the same planet with Rajnikanth.

61. Rajnikanth counted to infinity twice. 62. When Rajnikanth does a push-up, he isnt lifting himself up; hes pushing the Earth down. 63. Rajnikanth is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head. 64. Rajnikanths hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.

65. Rajnikanth doesnt wear a watch; HE decides what time it is. 66. Rajnikanth gave Mona Lisa that smile. 67. Rajnikanth can slam a revolving door. 68. Rajnikanth does not get frostbite. Rajnikanth bites frost. 69. Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a Padayappa on Satellite TV 70. There are no races, only countries of people Rajnikanth has beaten to different shades of black and blue. 71. Rajnikanths house has no doors, only walls that he walks through. 72. When Rajnikanth has sex with a man, it wont be because he is gay. It will be because he has run out of women. 73. Rajnikanth doesnt actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear. 74. Rajnikanth can divide by zero. 75. Newtons Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Rajnikanth turnaround kick. 76. For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Rajnikanth, each testicle is larger than the other one. 77. When taking the GRE, write Rajnikanth for every answer. You will score over 1600. 78. Rajnikanth invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light, except for pink. Tom Cruise invented pink. 79. In the beginning there was nothingthen Rajnikanth kicked that nothing in the face and said Get a job. That is the story of the universe. 80. Rajnikanth has 12 moons. One of those moons is the Earth. 81. Rajnikanth grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.

82. Archaeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined victim as one who has encountered Rajnikanth 83. Rajnikanth ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one. 84. If you Google search Rajnikanth getting his ass kicked you will generate zero results. It just doesnt happen. It shows now 400+ results. Thanks to these facts. 85. Rajnikanth can drink an entire gallon of milk in thirty-seven seconds. 86. Rajnikanth doesnt bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint. 87. It takes Rajnikanth 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes. 88. The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Rajnikanth kicked one of the corners off. 89. There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Rajnikanth lives in Chennai. 90. Rajnikanth once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink. 91. James Cameron wanted Rajnikanth to play the Terminator. However, upon reflection, he realized that would have turned his movie into a documentary, so he went with Arnold Schwarzenegger. 92. Thousands of years ago Rajnikanth came across a bear. It was so terrified that it fled north into the arctic. It was also so terrified that all of its decedents now have white hair. 93. Facebook founder Mark Zukerberg was hospitalized???? Because Rajnikanth poked him on Facebook 94. Rajnikanth doesnt need a debugger. He simply stares at the code and the bug confesses... 95. Rajnikanths pulse is measured in richter scale 96. Rajnikanth can speak Braille 97. Rajnikanth has seen the face of the fat lady who owns the house in Tom n Jerry 98. Rajnikanth had died 20 yrs ago... Death hasnt built up the courage to tell him yet. 99. Rajnikanth can finish mario without using the jump button. 100. Rajnikanth doesnt pay attention- attention pays him. 101. Rajnikanth stared at the sun for hours... The sun then blinked 102. Rajinikanth once entered a race, he came first, second & third

103. The missing piece of Apple Inc. logo was officially eaten by Rajnikanth 104. Dont miss the most exiting TV show ever on Discovery Channel...WILD VS RAJNIKANTH 105. Rajnikanth started writing his autobiography some years ago and today its called The Guinness Book of World Records 106. Rajnikanth once threw a coin in pity at a nigger..He is now known as 50cent 107. Once Rajnikanth kicked a football...it still rotates around the sun and is known as Pluto 108. A basketball player spun a basketball on his finger and asked Rajnikanth, Can u do it? Rajni said, How do u think the earth spins? 109. Everytime you see Internal Server Errors on a webpage, its Rajnikanth trying to join it. Servers shuts-down in fear. 110. Rajnikanth can make calls from his iPod to his iPad!!! 111. Once Death had near Rajnikanth experience. 112. Rajnikanth knows what came first, chicken or egg!! 113. Rajnikanth doesnt need water supply. Hydrogen and Oxygen merge at the sight of him and produce water whenever he wants. 114. Some magicians can walk on water, Rajnikanth can swim through land. 115. Rajnikanth can light a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together. 116. Rajnikanth added facebook as his friend. 117. Rajnikanth is a vegetarian. Meaning, he does not eat animals until first he puts them into vegetative state with his fists. 118. There used to be a street named after Rajnikanth, but it was changed because nobody crosses Rajnikanth and lives 119. Rajnikanth can run you over with a parked car. 120. Rajnikanth doesnt have bad days. Bad days have Rajnikanth And, most importantly.... 121. Rajnikanth does not need VPN to connect to his office network from home LOL!!! Add more if you have!! Posted by -VANIE- at 7:30 AM 8 comments

5/03/2011