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In Our Life

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/25675708.

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences


Archive Warning: Major Character Death
Category: M/M
Fandom: Haikyuu!!
Relationship: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Akaashi Keiji & Bokuto Koutarou
Character: Akaashi Keiji, Bokuto Koutarou
Additional Tags: uhhh i couldnt handle the ending lmaoo, suicide TW, Guardian angel
tingz, yeah its sappy idc idc idc, lowkey open ending bc i like to make
myself suffer
Stats: Published: 2020-08-02 Words: 1873

In Our Life
by piss_dumpster

Summary

so this is basically what I like to think happened after littleluxrays (in another life) ending!!

tried to keep it as not forced as possible bc i absolutely hate those where they are just like
“and then they woke up ” so hopefully i did a good job

tw for suicide !!

also if u wanna support me i have an art account on tiktok @idiotic.beez

Notes

See the end of the work for notes

Inspired by In Another Life by LittleLuxray

“youre just dream” akaashi sobbed.

“w- what?”

“you died!” akaashi spat out. the word died coming out trembling, as if he was just realizing it
now.

“i- i know.” bokuto said, sitting up higher.

“no you dont” he retorted.

“im still here keiji” bokuto said softly.


“no you're not, stop lying to me” akaashi sobbed.

“i'm sorry”

“w-what”

“im sorry it turned out like this”

“bokuto...” akaashi said between sobs

“in another life you could have been here.”

“instead of there”

akaashi stayed silent.

“i'm sorry you can't stay.” bokuto said now wiping his own eyes.

akaashi eyes dried up slightly as he sat up.

“i-“ akaashi began.

“it wasn’t supposed to happen like this” he continued now aggressively rubbing his eyes.

“kotaro-“ akaashi said as he sat up to meet the trembling man's torso.

he wrapped his arms softly around the others figure as he slowly came down.

“you could have been mine” he sighed.

“I am yours,” akaashi said as he squeezed the other.

they sat in silence bokuto's tears dampening akaashis shirt. but in all honesty akaashi couldn’t care
less.

akaashi wanted to stay with him forever.


it was perfect.
akaashi woulc have been complete if they could of just stayed like that forever.
but of course he couldn’t.
he was just a dream.
and akaashi had to wake up.

————

akaashi felt himself being pulled down into the bed. He tried to move but nothing happened. He
felt his essence soak through the mattress leaving his body until he was under the bed.

“akaashi?” bokuto asked.

akaashi?!” he asked again more frantic, reaching for the body but his hands just sunk into it as if it
was just a sheet.

“keiji” bokuto sobbed silently as akaashi dropped into nothing.

just darkness.

not cold.
not hot.

just nothing.

—————

akaashi was greeted again by the familiar feeling of warmth on his face. He blinked softly, opening
his eyes to the stinging sunlight.

he sat up slowly feeling exhausted.

he squeezed the object next to him.

expecting warmth he was met with nothing.

he opened his eyes further to inspect the object.

it was a pillow.

just a pillow.

akaashi blinked some more remembering where he was.

he sat up further and looked at the pillow.

it was slathered with snot and tears.

“ju- just a dre-“ a sob cut him off as he snapped at the pillow pulling it into his arms.

he held onto the pillow for dear life.

he sobbed as he felt his lungs give out causing a coughing fit.

he continued.

he sobbed until his throat couldn't make any more sound.

from there he screamed.

he just yelled.

nothing more than just aimless screaming.

he wanted to scream at everything.

god, bokuto, his life, the world, the universe.

he just yelled until he couldn’t anymore.

calming himself down from the fit he sobbed more quietly.

his voice, scratchy and painful but he couldn't stop.

the tears just kept flowing.


until they couldn't anymore.

He sat there for hours.

just simply sitting in his head.

he thought of bokuto.

remembering him.

well is it really remembering if you never forgot?

he contemplated his voice.

he thought about how bokuto made him feel.

bokuto made the world feel okay to akaashi.

bokuto was the world to akaashi.

He wanted to be with him.

he needed to be with him.

akaashis knew what he had to do.

akaashi stood up slowly.

every movement was a struggle as if an invisible force was pulling him back.

he ignored it as he pushed on through.

The force got stronger but akaashi didn't care.

he pulled his night stand towards the middle of the room.

the force pulled as hard as it could.

akaashi knew he shouldn't. but he needed to. he couldn't stand only seeing him in dreams.

he knew this was the only way.

akaashi scanned the room. eyeing his, no, bokutos scarf. He picked up and smelled it once more.

he laughed softly to himself. before tying the object.

he stood up on the nightstand before tying the makeshift noose to his ceiling fan.

he looked at his bed once more before pulling the noose over his head. He stood there in silence
feeling the force pull around him.

he chuckled softly to himself before speaking, his voice sounded awful. “s-see you soon” he said
looked down at his hands.

he closed his eyes and took a deep breath in.

he began rocking the nightstand back and forth before it fell.


his body falling with it until a burning pain seared throughout his body.

the air escaping his lungs.

he felt his life ending.

his reflexes tried to kick in but he just stuck his nails into his thighs and hung.

he finally let his last breath out.

and after a couple of minutes he just laid there.

hanging from the ceiling fan.

he felt his soul ball up inside of him.

it felt like days he just sat there.

he just sat waiting.

until he felt something.

he felt a hand.

reach deep into his core frantically searching for something.

he floated towards the hand.

the ball forming a hand he held on.

the hand pulled him out of the corpse.

his eyes formed as he watched the orb pull him up.

he blinked softly trying to stay there but to no avail.

his eyes fluttered closed as the orb continued dragging him.

———————

he woke up being shaken.

“what the FUCK!” a voice shrieked. shaking him

“w- what” akaashi said softly.

“why! why the fuck would you do that!” the voice demanded clutching his shoulders in its hands.

“w- what” he opened his eyes and saw a familiar pair staring back at him.

“i tried to prevent it! why couldnt you just have fucking listened.'' the voice broke out in sobs now
dampening akaashis shirt.

“f- fuck!” the voice sobbed hysterically falling into akaashis chest.

“k- kotaro?”
“k- k- kotaro?” akashi said as a question but he knew.

he knew it.

theres no way he could of mistaken it.

the voice etched into his heart.

the voice made to make music with his.

the voice didn't answer.

“kotaro” akaashis voice broke out in wails akashi leaned forward to hold the man.

“why couldn’t you listen.” bokuto sobbed.

“I could- i couldn't live without you,” akaashi said barely audible.

“fucking idiot” bokuto cried.

the two just sobbed together for a while finally silencing down their sobs to silence. until one spoke
up.

“where are we?” akaashi asked, rubbing bokuto's hair.

“after life obviously” bokuto said quietly still angry, head resting on akaashis stomach.

“it worked.” akaashi laughed.

“god you really aren't funny if thats your idea of humor.” bokuto spat.

akaashi silenced himself as he reached for bokuto's face.

he lifted his face to meet his own.

bokuto sighed as he looked up at him.

akaashi smiled as bokuto stared at him not budging.

akaashi sighed and smiled widder this time laughing.

bokuto tried to hold onto his anger but he couldn’t.

he just sighed and sat his face back down into his loves stomach before letting out a hearty laugh.

the sound alone brough akaashi to tears. He cried as bokuto sat up to wrap his arms around him.

they sat there embraced holding each other as hard as the could as they laughed and cried.

they died down gently after a while as bokuto held onto akaashi’s torso as akaashi left his arms fall
limp as his head laid on bokuto's shoulder.

“is this it?” akaashi began

“is this what?”

“our end?”
“maybe”

“maybe?”

“well you can live an infinite amount of lives” bokuto began

“you should remember that now that you're here right?”

akaashi nodded as the memories came back.

he didn’t quite understand all his memories but he remembered knowing that once.

it was weird to think about, living an entire life thinking one thing.

just for it to restart again and again.

he also remembered rejecting thousands of lifes before this one.

“but your only destined with one”

“yeah, but-“ akaashi paused before continuing.

“how do you know?”

“you just do”

“what do you think”

“i think this is it”

“It's ugly, it's sad, it's awful…” bokuto continued.

“but in the end you're still with me” bokuto finished as he pulled akaashi into a tighter hug.

akaashi nodded his hand combing through his hair.

“who knows maybe your perfect life you would have never met me” bokuto spoke but akaashi cut
him off.

“then it wouldn't have been perfect”

bokuto laughed softly into the crook of his neck.

“hey do you remember them?” akaashi began.

bokuto looked up at akaashi quizzically.

“the past lives?” akaashi explained,

“no?” bokuto replied now with more interest.

“i think i do”

“you do?”

“y-yeah,,, this ones different though.”


“how so?”

“i remember how I felt in the others in my final moments and afterlife. it wasn't bad but it wasn't
this”

“i felt happy. overjoyed even.”

“but now.”

“now i feel..” akaashi continued

“complete” bokuto said, cutting akaashi off.

akaashi mumbled a yes before shoving his face further down into his neck.

“i- i love you keiji” bokuto said as he lifted his head off of his should

“i love you too kotaro” akaashi said as he lifted his face up to greet bokutos and smiled.

bokuto felt his own face blushed up as he chuckled.

“any ending where i'm with you till the end of time is good with me” bokuto said.

——————

and they lived happily ever after in the afterlife becoming guardian angels to couples bound by
eternal fate.

they helped those that were stuck in the eternal loop.

life after life.

giving them that little push to continue.

continue working.

life after life.

until they found their one.

their one true love.

life after life.

part of them wondered if anyone did that for them.

gave them that extra push...

part of them wanted to believe they were the first.

they'd be right to believe that.

they were the first.

well in less words.

they were meant to be.


in every way possible.

——————

they were able to stop the constant loop of life after life.

bokuto breaking through the spirit world to the living world, somehow connecting with akaashi
through a dream.

akaashi pushing past bokuto's spirit, remembering his past lives.

them both knowing.

just simply knowing.

that they were fully complete.

they ascended gods power.

pushing past unknown blockages just for love.

you could say they were connected, bound, destined.

but it was more than that.

they just were.

they were just simply them.

nothing could separate them.

not the cruel endings of fate, not death, not invisible forces.

they were unstoppable.

and so they got the ending they deserved.

the original guardian angels of love.

led by none other than love.

—————

everything was against them.

the world, the people, the universe...

but they didn't care

they just loved.

and that love broke through.

nothing was rooting for them.

but that didn't stop them


it couldn't.

so they loved

and loved

and loved,

until it was enough to destroy everything in their way.

and so they continued loving.

until the end of time.

——————

until another life,

End Notes

explaining a little,,,, basically the world is set so that you go through constant lives until
you supposedly are able to stop the constant loop. however no one had been able to do it
before akaashi and bokuto,,,

so they decide to use this power and continue bringing it forward to help other destined
couples

also the comma at the end is supposed to be like but you dont really know if this IS their
ending yet. bc really it could just be another life in the millions

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