Alice in Wonderland SAMPLE SCRIPT ёMaverick Musicals and Plays

ALICE IN WONDERLAND
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Copyright © 1989 Maverick Musicals Pty Ltd

Script/Lyrics/Music © 1989 Mike Carter
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ISBN 1 875358 17 X
Please note that it is a breach of Copyright to copy scripts and music, or to perform musicals or plays without the permission of Maverick Musicals Pty Ltd
ALICE IN WONDERLAND
by
Mike Carter
ALICE IN WONDERLAND was first

produced at the Grand Opera House,
York, in 1989 and has enjoyed over
500 performances since, making this
adaptation, without doubt, one of the
most successful musical versions of
Lewis Carroll’s classic children’s story
ever written. It can be staged with just
8 actors/actresses (that involves most of
the cast playing 3 or 4 characters), but
it does lend itself equally well to much
larger companies; in fact there are no
fewer than 24 speaking and singing
parts.
The adaptation draws out all the

humour and magic of the original story
and creates an exciting and challenging
musical with plenty of audience
involvement and participation.
CAST
Alice
The White Rabbit
The French Mouse
The Dodo
The Duck
(additonal creatures in The Pool of Tears)
The Caterpillar
The Fish Footman
The Frog Footman
The Cook
PY
The Duchess
Y
The Cheshire Cat
TO L The Mad Hatter
O
The Dormouse
Card Gardener number 2
N
Card Gardener number 5
C Card Gardener number 7

AL O
The Queen of Hearts

The King of Hearts
(additonal soldiers and playing cards)
G E
Tweedledum
Tweedledee
L
The Gryphon
The Mock Turtle
LE P
(additional jurors)
IL M
SA
This Musicals can be performed with a cast of just 8 adults:
Alice is played by the same actress throughout.

The White Rabbit doubles most effectively with The Cheshire Cat.
The remaining 6 actors/actresses can play the remaining parts.
SCENES AND SONGS
ACT ONE
Scene 1: Alice meets The White Rabbit
Song 1: Late for a Date with The Duchess The White Rabbit
Song 2: Curiouser and Curiouser (part 1) Alice
Song 3: Curiouser and Curiouser (part 2) Alice
Song 4: The Caucus Race The Dodo
PY
Song 5: The Caucus race (repeat) The Dodo with
Y
Audience
TO L Scene 2: Advice from The Caterpillar
O
N
Song 6: Keep your Temper The Caterpillar
C
AL O
Scene 3: The Duchess’s Kitchen
Song 7: Wow! Wow! Wow! The Duchess

G E
Song 8: Crash! Wallop! and Bang! The Cook

Song9/10: Crash! Wallop! and Bang! (repeats) The Cook and
L
Audience
LE P
Scene 4: The Mad Hatter’s Tea Party

IL M
Song 11: It’s all a Matter of Time The Hatter,

Dormouse
SA
and March Hare

Song 12/13: Matter of Time/Late for a Date The Hatter,
Dormouse, March
(1st and 2nd reprises) Hare, Alice and The
White Rabbit
SCENES AND SONGS
ACT TWO
Scene 1: The Palace Gardens
Song 14: Painting the Roses Red The Card Gardeners

Song 15: Off with her Head The Queen and King of
Hearts
Song 16/17/18: Off with her Head (reprises) The Queen of Hearts, Alice
with Audience
Scene 2: Tweedledum and Tweedledee
PY
Y
Song 19: Tweedledum and Tweedledee Tweedledum and
Tweedledee
TO L
O
Scene 3: At the Seashore
N
C Song 20: The Lobster Quadrille The Mock Turtle
AL O
Song 21: The Lobster Quadrille (reprise) The Mock Turtle and
Ensemble
G E
Scene 4: The Courtroom

L
Song 22/23: Consider your Verdict (repeats) The King and Queen of
Hearts
LE P
Song 24: Consider your Verdict (reprise) The King and Queen of
Hearts + Ensemble
IL M
Song 25: Wonderland Alice, Ensemble

SA
ACT ONE
Scene One
Alice meets the White Rabbit
The White Rabbit, in his waistcoat and tailed morning coat, is

sitting in the auditorium as the audience come in. He has a large
pocket watch which he keeps looking at nervously. When all the
audience are in, the house lights dim and the curtain rises.
Alice is sitting on a grassy bank; she is playing a game of patience

with a pack of cards. Beside her is a book. It is a hot, lazy, sunny
day, and she is obviously bored.
ALICE: (picking up the book and looking at it for a moment) Huh! What’s
PY
the use of a book without pictures or conversation? (she puts down
the book, then tosses the playing cards up into the air. They flutter
Y
to the ground)
TO L
O
Suddenly the white rabbit jumps up from his seat in the auditorium
N
C WHITE RABBIT: Oh no! I’m late! I’m so terribly late!
AL O
SONG 1: Late For A Date With The Duchess
WHITE RABBIT: I’m late for a date with The Duchess,

G E
My whiskers and my fur!

If you’re going to be late for a date with anyone,
L
Then don’t pick her!

She’s really such a stickler
LE P
For punctuality.
To be late for a date with The Duchess is
IL M
A terrible thing to be;

So you see,
Now you know,
SA
Why I simply have to go!
ALICE: (speaking) How very strange! A white rabbit with a pocket watch. I
wonder who The Duchess is and why he’s late.
WHITE RABBIT: (sings) I’m late for a date with The Duchess,
My whiskers and my paws!
I’ve never been late for a date with anyone,
Not ever before!
I really can’t imagine
What she might do to me;
So you see;
Now you know;
Why I simply have to go!
Alice starts to laugh
1
It’s not a laughing matter,
She’ll simply go insane.
If you’re ever late for The Duchess
Then you’ll never be late again!
WHITE RABBIT: (speaks) Oh dear! Oh dear! (he rushes about all over the stage)
(sings) I’m late for a date with The Duchess,

What a terrible thing to be!
If anyone’s late for a date with The Duchess,
It would be me!
Disaster and misfortune,
And oh, calamity!
So you see;
Now you know;
Why I-simply have to go.
PY
So you see;
Now you know;
Y
Why I simply have to ....
TO L I simply have to go!
O
Cheerio!
N
ALICE: (following the White Rabbit) Excuse me, I’m -
C
AL O
WHITE RABBIT: I can’t possibly talk to anyone - I’m so very late! Oh my whiskers
and fur!
G E
ALICE: But - (to audience) I wonder why he’s is such a hurry?

L
The White Rabbit disappears off-stage down a rabbit hole

LE P
Wait! Wait for me!

IL M
The White rabbit has gone. Alice, in pursuit, starts to descend.

Suddenly she begins to fall, and as she does so, her voice becomes
SA
an echo. The lights dim and music adds to the mysterious, dream-
like quality of the event
(without real dismay) Oh! Oh! I’m falling! What a strange

sensation! ...... like floating ........ only different ......... floating
down at an incredible speed! If I ever fall down the stairs at home,
it’ll be nothing compared to this. Everyone will think I’m so brave
when I tell them what’s happened. I wonder how far I’ve fallen? I
must be getting somewhere near the centre of the earth by now. I
wonder how thick the world is - from one side to the other? I might
even fall right through the heart! How funny it’ll seem to come
out among the people who walk with their heads downwards! The
antipathies, I think, or so is it some other word? I shall ask the
name of the country. Please, Ma’am, is this Australia? Oh!
2
Suddenly there is a loud thump. Alice has landed! The lights come
up slowly. Alice is in the centre of the stage in a crumpled heap.
The White rabbit is scurrying about, humming the odd line from his
song” “Late for a Date with The Duchess”
WHITE RABBIT: Oh, my whiskers and ears! How late it’s getting!
There are three doors on stage of varying, size. One is large, one
is medium-sized, and one is small. The White Rabbit opens the
medium-sized one and disappears upstage out of sight. Alice rushes
after him, but she is just too late: the door bangs closed, and The
White Rabbit has gone
ALICE: (trying to open the door) Oh, it’s locked, and I so wanted to speak
to him. (she tries the largest door, but that is also locked) Oh dear!
(she tries the smallest one) Perhaps this one opens. (it does) But
PY
I’m much too big to get through. Oh, what’s this? (she notices for
the first time a little bottle. She picks it up and reads the label)
Y
“Drink me!” It’s all very well to say “Drink me” but it could be
TO L poison. (she sniffs the contents) It doesn’t smell like poison ... in
O
fact it smells quite nice. I do hope it’s safe.
N
C Alice drinks from the bottle. Suddenly the lights go out. In the
darkness the three doors start to revolve
AL O
The doors are mounted onto triangular shaped trucks with

central pivots. When the lights come back on again the trucks
G E
have partially revolved revealing three more doors which are all
proportionally larger. The impression is that Alice has shrunk.
L
Alice sings her song in darkness so that the audience do not see the
LE P
trucks revolving
IL M
I’m shrinking! I’m shrinking! I’m shutting up like a telescope!

SA
SONG 2: Curiouser and Curiouser (part one)
ALICE: Curiouser and curiouser.

How strange the world is now!
It seems that I’m just ten inches high,
And everything else is ten feet tall.
The lighting returns to normal
Well, at least I’m small enough now to get through that little door.
(she tries the door but it is locked) Oh no! I don’t believe it - it’s
locked now - and I so wanted to (she suddenly notices a little box)
Now what’s this? (she picks up the box and takes out a small cake
which she holds up) Look what it says: “Eat me”. I suppose it
can’t do me any more harm. (to the audience) Shall I eat some? I
shall blame you if I feel poorly afterwards. (she takes a bite and
immediately darkness follows) Now, I’m opening up again, like a
3
giant telescope. Goodbye feet!
In the darkness the trucks are revolved again. On the third side
of each truck is another door, each one proportionally smaller.
When the lights come on again when the revolve is complete, the
impression is that Alice has grown
SONG 3: Curiouser and Curiouser (part two)
ALICE: Curiouser and curiouser,

How strange the world is now!
One moment I’m just ten inches high,
And now I’m over ten feet tall.
ALICE: Oh this just isn’t fair. Now I’m much too big to get through any
of these doors. (she sits down and starts to cry) You ought to be
ashamed of yourself; crying like this. (she takes a handkerchief out
PY
of her sleeve and wipes her eyes) Stop it at once, I tell you. (she
stops crying) Well, I shall just have to drink some more from that
Y
magic bottle won’t I? Now where is it?
TO L
O
Alice finds the bottle and drinks. The lights go out for a final
N
time and the trucks revolve again so that when the light return to
C normal, the trucks have revolved through 360 degress and we are
AL O
back where we started, only now the stage is full of suspended

drops of water representing the tears which Alice shed when she
was larger. Alice starts to swim and as she does so there is the
G E
sound of splashing water

L
At least I’m a sensible height now. (she splutters as she swims

about through the water) But I wish I hadn’t cried so much when
LE P
I was tall. It looks as if I might even drown in my own tears. (to

audience) Now, wouldn’t that be ridiculous?
IL M
Alice suddenly notices a mouse who has paddled onto the stage
SA
Oh look at that mouse (to the Mouse) - I don’t suppose you know
your way out of this pool, do you? I’m very tired of swimming
about. (the mouse ignores her) Perhaps it doesn’t understand
English. It could be a French mouse come over with William the
Conqueror. (to the audience) Well, why not? (positively) I shall
speak to it in French. Right ... here goes ... er ... oh ... I’m not very
good at French. (to the audience) Do you know any French words?
(they help her out) Oh yes ....(speaking to the mouse) Parlez-vous
Anglais? ... Excusez-moi ... Comment allez-vous? (the Mouse
ignores her until she asks:) Ou est ma chat? (at this the mouse
jumps with fright and starts to paddle twice as quickly) Oh dear!
What have I said? Ou est ma chat? Let me see ... that means:
“Where ... is ... my ... cat?” Where is my cat! No wonder I upset
him. (to the audience) Who suggested I say that? (to the mouse) I
beg your pardon!. I forgot you didn’t like cats.
4
MOUSE: (with a strong French accent) Not like cats! Would you like cats if
you were me?
ALICE: Perhaps not - but please don’t be angry. We won’t talk about cats if
you’d rather not.
MOUSE: We indeed! As if I should talk on such a subject! Our family always

hated cats: nasty low, vulgar things! Don’t let me hear the name
again. Just get me to the shore!
A Duck and a Dodo have joined them in the pool. Other strange
creatures may also have join them as well (and share some of the
Duck’s lines)
DODO: (pompously) You’re not the only one, you know. Others are
suffering similar misfortunes.
PY
DUCK: Ducks like water! Quack!
Y
TO LEAGLET: I dare say they do!
O
N
ALICE: I think the shore’s this way. Follow me.
C The animals swim after Alice, and the suspended drops are “flown
AL O
off”
ALICE: (shaking herself in an effort to get dry) I’m soaking wet.

G E
DODO: Then I suggest an energetic remedy to resolve the perplexities of

L
the present predicament.

LE P
DUCK: Speak English! Quack! I don’t understand the meaning of half

IL M
those long words.
DODO: What I was about to say was: the only thing to get us all dry is a
SA
Caucus Race.
ALICE: What’s a Caucus Race?
DODO: (surprised) You mean you ....? (he sighs heavily) Well , I suppose
the only way to explain it ... is to do it. Now ... (he flaps his tiny
wings vaguely) This is the boundary. You all stand ... wherever you
want to. (he walks over to the The Musical Director and bows low)
And ... music, Maestro, please.
During the song everyone on stage rushes about in any direction
SONG 4: Caucus Race
DODO: Run here, run there,

Run anywhere you want to,
5
Just run and scatter.
This way, that way,
Any way you want to,
It doesn’t matter.
Just charge about all over the place,
Hither and thither at a raucos pace;
Run this way, that way,
Anyway you want to:
That’s a Caucus Race!
There is a short instrumental passage as the “race” continues
ALL: Run here, run there,

Just run and scatter,.
This way, that way,
PY
Hither and thither at a raucous pace;
Y
Any way you want to:
TO L That’s a Caucus Race!
O
DODO: (announcing grandly) The race is over!
N
C MOUSE: Over? But I’m not dry yet.
AL O
DODO: In that case we shall have to run the race all over again.
G E
DUCK: Oh yes, please. I did enjoy it. Quack!

L
ALICE: I think it would be much more fun if there were more contestants.
LE P
DODO: (still very aloof) You do, do you?

IL M
DUCK: Oh, yes! Why don’t we ask ... (in a loud whisper, and jerking his
thumb at the audience) ... some of them? Quack!
SA
DODO: Out of the question!
DUCK: (disappointed) Oh!
DODO: We couldn’t possibly. (he puffs out his chest and looks down his
beak with great contempt) They’re not our type.
DUCK: Not our type? Quack! What do you mean?
DODO: They wouldn’t be any good!
ALICE: I’m sure they would.
DUCK: Let’s ask them.
6
DODO: No!
DUCK: Oh, go on. Quack!
ALICE: Come on then.
At first the Dodo stands his ground, but eventually he follows the
other three into the audience. Four children are chosen to take
part, and the Dodo takes over as organiser again.
DODO: Now you all stand ... well, wherever you want to. (to the Musical
Director) Music, Maestro, please.
SONG 5: Caucus Race (repeat)
DODO: Run here, run there,
PY
Just run and scatter.
Y
This way, that way,
TO L It doesn’t matter.
O
Hither and thither at a raucos pace;
N
C Anyway you want to:

AL O
There is a short instrumental passage as the “race” continues

G E
ALL: Run here, run there,

L
Just run and scatter,

This way, that way,
LE P

IL M

Hither and thither at a raucous pace;
SA
Any way you want to:

DODO: (assuming that the applause at the end of the song is for him)
Thank you. So very kind of you all!
DUCK: (getting carried away) More! More! Quack! Encore! One more
time! Quack! (suddenly he is aware that he is the only one making
a noise) Oops! Sorry!
ALICE: (approaching the Dodo) Please ... just once more. I’m still a tiny bit
wet. (she holds out a corner of her dress) Feel!
The Dodo remains aloof
DUCK: (realising that flattery is the best approach) That was a lovely song!
Quack! Did you write it?
7
DODO: I was indeed the composer of the aforementioned melody.
DUCK: (to the Mouse) Does that mean he wrote it?
DODO: (quickly) I did!
DUCK: It was ever so good, you know.
MOUSE: And it really was a very nice race too.
DODO: Very well. In that case we shall all sing the song one more time.
The song and the race are repeated with the contestants on stage.
At the end of the song, the Duck dashes up to The Dodo
DUCK: (eagerly) Who’s won? Quack! Who’s won? Come on, then; who’s
PY
won?
Y
DODO: Won what?
TO L
O
DUCK: The race, of course, the race! You said it was a race. A Caucus
N
Race.
C DODO: Indeed I did.

AL O
DUCK: Well ... who’s won? We’re all waiting. Quack!

G E
DODO: (after pausing for thought) Everyone has won, and everyone must
have a prize.
L
LE P
MOUSE: And who’s going to give the prizes?

IL M
DODO: (pointing at Alice) She is, of course.
ALICE: Me? But I haven’t got any prizes. All I’ve got is ... (she digs into
SA
her pocket and pulls out a bag of sweets much to her surprise) ... a
bag of sweets!
DODO: Perfect! (he takes the sweets and hands them out. When he reaches
Alice the packet is empty)
MOUSE: But she must have a prize herself, you know.
DODO: (gravely) Of course. (to Alice) What else do you have in your
pocket?
ALICE: (sadly) Only a thimble.
DODO: Hand it over here. (Alice hands it over) We beg your acceptance
of this elegant thimble. (he hands it over to Alice and everyone
8
applauds)
ALICE: (puzzled but curtsying graciously) Thank you. (speaking generally)

Well, what an extraordinary race ... and what strange rules! I’ve
never known anything like it before, though it was fun, wasn’t it? I
wonder where the White Rabbit went to? I shall ask the others. (she
turns to speak to the other animals, but they have left the stage)
Oh, they’ve gone. And they didn’t even say goodbye. I think that’s
rather impolite really. I shall just have to look for the White Rabbit
myself. (calling) White Rabbit! White Rabbit!
Alice starts to exit in pursuit of the White Rabbit. The lights fade
Scene Two
Advice from the Caterpillar
PY
The stage is bare except for a large mushroom upon which sits a
Y
big, fat, blue caterpillar. His arms are folded, and he is smoking a
TO L hookah. The sound of Alice calling after the white Rabbit can just
O
be heard off-stage
N
C Alice enters
AL O
ALICE: (calling) White Rabbit! White Rabbit! (suddenly she notices the
caterpillar. They stare at each other for a moment)
G E
CATERPILLAR: (taking the hookah out of his mouth, and addressing Alice in a
languid, sleepy way) Who are you?
L
LE P
ALICE: I don’t really know, Sir. Well, I knew who I was when I got up this
morning, of course, but so many strange things have happened to
IL M
me since then, that I no longer really know who I am.
CATERPILLAR: What do you mean by that? Explain yourself!

SA
ALICE: I cannot explain myself, I’m afraid, Sir, because I’m not myself,
you see.
CATERPILLAR: I don’t see.
ALICE: (politely) I’m afraid I can’t put it any more clearly. I wish I could,
but I can’t begin to understand it myself, and I keep changing size;
I’ve already been lots of different sizes to-day.
CATERPILLAR: And what size are you now?
ALICE: I don’t really know that. If you’re a caterpillar -
CATERPILLAR: I most certainly am!
9
ALICE: Then I suppose ... (she tries to work out her height in relation to the
caterpillar) .... I suppose I must be about three inches high.
CATERPILLAR: And what, may I ask, is so wrong with being three inches high?
ALICE: Oh, it’s a rotten height.
CATERPILLAR: It is a very good height indeed!
ALICE: It might be for you, but I’m afraid I’m not used to it. I’d like to be
taller.
CATERPILLAR: You’ll get used to it.
ALICE: I don’t really want to “get used to it,” Sir. Oh, it’s all confusing.
PY
CATERPILLAR: No. it isn’t!
Y
ALICE: Well, perhaps you haven’t found it so yet, but one day you’ll
TO L turn into a chrysalis, and then into a butterfly. I bet you’ll find it
O
confusing then.
N
C CATERPILLAR: Not in the slightest!
AL O
ALICE: Perhaps then caterpillars don’t feel the same as humans do. I’m
sure it would feel very odd to me.
G E
CATERPILLAR: (deliberately) Who are you?

L
ALICE: (after sighing deeply) Why don’t you tell me who you are first?
LE P
CATERPILLAR: Why should I?

IL M
ALICE: This really isn’t much of a conversation, you know. I think I shall
find someone else to talk to. (she starts to exit)
SA
CATERPILLAR: Come back, immediately. I have something important to say to you.
ALICE: (returning) Well? It had better be good.
CATERPILLAR: Oh, it’s very good indeed!
SONG 6: Keep Your Temper
CATERPILLAR: Keep your temper, little girl,

Make every effort to preserve your dignity.
Don’t lose your temper, little girl,
And with any luck you’ll grow up just like me!
If you stay calm and collected,
You will always be respected,
By everyone who walks upon this world.
So just come over here,
10
Let me whisper in your ear:
Keep your temper, little girl!
Don’t be angry, little girl,

It’s unbecoming to behave the way you do.
You should be stately, little girl,
Elegant and calm and graceful, too.
In this busy world of noise,
You must strive to keep your poise,
And never get your bloomers in a twirl!
So, if you please, walk this way,
There is something I must say:
Some animals are known for their bad manners,

I’m sure that I could mention one of two.
A nasty little house-fly should be swatted.
If it behaved as noisily as you!
PY
So keep your temper, little girl,
Make every effort to preserve your dignity..
Y
Don’t lose your temper, little girl,
And with any luck you’ll grow up just like me!
TO L If you stay calm and collected,
O
You will always be respected,
N
By everyone who walks upon this world.
So just come over here,
C Let me whisper in your ear:

AL O

CATERPILLAR: So you want to change size, do you?

G E
ALICE: Yes, I do.

L
LE P
CATERPILLAR: (getting down off the mushroom) One side will make you grow
taller, and the other side will make you grow shorter.
IL M
ALICE: One side of what? The other side of what?

SA
CATERPILLAR: Of the mushroom! (he exits)
ALICE: I don’t think I trust him. (she gets up onto the mushroom and
sits there) I mean... he was rather odd, wasn’t he? But then so’s
everyone round here. I’ve grown and shrunk and grown and
shrunk and ... perhaps the mushroom will make me taller. (to the
audience) What do you think? Should I try it? Well, nothing really
dreadful has happened to me yet, has it? And no tummy aches! But
a mushroom! I don’t even like the taste of mushrooms! (she gets off
the mushroom and walks round to the side of it. She kneels down
and opens her mouth wide) No! Wait a moment! How do I know
which side is which? I certainly don’t want to get any smaller, or
I’ll disappear altogether. The left side? The right? Well, make up
your minds. I’ll try the left side. (she goes over to the left side of
the mushroom and takes a bite. Immediately the stage is plunged
11
into darkness. We hear the familiar music again, and when the
lights come back up again, Alice is in exactly the same position, but
the mushroom appears to have vanished. In fact a tiny mushroom,
about three inches high, is in its place. Alice bends down and
picks it up) It’s the mushroom! It’s tiny! Which means I must have
grown.
Enter from stage left the Frog Footman, and from stage right
the Fish Footman. They are both dressed in full livery, and have
powdered, curly hair. They advance towards each other until they
are just a few feet apart facing each other. Alice looks at them at
amazement. They are indeed strange creatures. The Fish Footman
produces from under his arm a great letter nearly as large as
himself. He holds it out for the Frog Footman
FISH FOOTMAN: (solemnly) For the Duchess. An invitation from the Queen to play
PY
croquet.
Y
They both bow low and their curly hair gets tangled together. Alice
TO L starts to giggle. The two footmen struggle to separate themselves
O
N
FISH FOOTMAN: What amuses you?
C ALICE: (trying to suppress her giggles) Nothing! Really nothing!

AL O
(regaining her composure) Did you say an invitation?
FROGFOOTMAN: From the Queen.

G E
FISH FOOTMAN: To the Duchess.

L
LE P
FOOTMAN: To play croquet.

IL M
ALICE: Let me help you. (she goes over to the two footmen and separates
them) I’ve heard a bit about the Duchess.
SA
FROG FOOTMAN: And what have you heard about the Queen?
ALICE: Why .... nothing?
FISH FOOTMAN: Nothing?
ALICE: Nothing at all! Who is she?
FISH FOOTMAN: She is: The Queen -
FROG FOOTMAN: of Hearts!
This could be the cue for a thunder-clap or some other terrifying

noise
12
ALICE: (unimpressed) Well?
FISH FOOTMAN: She will have you executed.
ALICE: But why? I’ve done nothing wrong!
FISH FOOTMAN: She will have you -
BOTH FOOTMAN: Executed!
Another thunder-clap
ALICE: (somewhat more concerned now) But -
Both Footmen turn away and start to exit in the direction from
which they came
PY
ALICE: Don’t go! (not knowing which one to follow) Why does everyone
Y
keep leaving? (she chases after the Fish Footman and catches him
TO L just before he exits) I really don’t like the sound of the Queen at
O
all, but I’d quite like to meet the Duchess.
N
C FISH FOOTMAN: You would, would you?
AL O
ALICE: Yes!
FISH FOOTMAN: Are you sure?

G E
ALICE: Quite sure!

L
LE P
FISH FOOTMAN: Well, I’m afraid you can’t. (he starts to exit again)
IL M
ALICE: (following) Why not?
FISH-FOOTMAN: Because ... because ... oh, very well ... but just remember.
SA
ALICE: Remember what?
FISH-FOOTMAN: You weren’t invited.
Alice and the Fish Footman exit. The lights fade
Scene Three
The Duchess’s Kitchen
The kitchen. The room is full of smoke and noise. The Duchess is
sitting on a three-legged stool in the middle of the stage nursing
a baby. The cook is leaning over the fire stirring a giant cauldron
of soup and generally making much noise as he can as he crashes
13
about with pots and pans. He has an enormous pepper mill which
he grinds into the soup. The Duchess and the baby keep sneezing.
The Cheshire cat, curled up on the hearth, is grinning broadly.
Enter Alice; immediately she sneezes. She walks over to the

cauldron to see what the cook is making. She dips her finger into
the cauldron and tastes the soup
ALICE: (sneezing) There’s much too much pepper in this soup.
COOK: (speaking in a very loud Italian accent) Too much! Too much! Not
enough more like it. (he grinds in more pepper and continues to
crash about)
ALICE: (approaching the Duchess) Excuse me, Duchess, but could you tell
me why your cat grins like that?
PY
DUCHESS: It’s a Cheshire Cat; that’s why! (to the baby) Pig!
Y
TO LALICE: I didn’t know that Cheshire Cats always grinned. In fact, I didn’t
O
know that cats could grin at all.
N
C DUCHESS: They all can, and most of ‘em do.
AL O
ALICE: I don’t know of any that do.
DUCHESS: You don’t know much, and that’s a fact. (to the baby) Pig!
G E
The Cook, who is continuing to make a noise suddenly starts to

L
throw pots and pans and fire-irons and dishes at the Duchess and
LE P
the baby. The Duchess takes no notice, but the baby howls
IL M
ALICE: (to the Cook) Oh, please mind what you’re doing.
DUCHESS: If everybody minded their own business, the world would go round
SA
a deal faster than it does.
ALICE: Which would not be an advantage. You see, the earth takes twenty-
four hours to turn on its axis.
DUCHESS: Talking of axes; have you met the Queen of Hearts?
There is a thunder-clap
ALICE: No, I haven’t ... but why axes?
DUCHESS: Oh, never mind! Sing the baby a lullaby.
ALICE: A lullaby? I’m afraid -
14
DUCHESS: Afraid? What of, child? This baby won’t harm you.
ALICE: I meant I -
DUCHESS: (impatiently) I’ll sing it a lullaby. (she tosses the baby up and down
as she sings)
SONG 7: Wow! Wow! Wow!
DUCHESS: Speak roughly to your little boy,

And beat him when he sneezes:
He only does it to annoy,
Because he knows it teases.
ALL(EXCEPT WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW!

ALICE): WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW!
WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW!
PY
WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW,! WOW! WOW,! WOW!
Y
DUCHESS: I speak severely to my boy,
TO L I beat him when he sneezes;
O
For he can thoroughly enjoy
T’he pepper when he pleases.
N
C ALL(EXCEPT
ALICE):
AL O
WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW!

WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW! WOW!
G E
ALICE: (jumping up and down with her hands over her ears) Stop it! Stop
it!
L
SAMPLE ONLY
LE P
To purchase the full script,

IL M
please head to
SA
www.maverickmusicals.com
15
The Duchess exits
ALICE: (to the cook) Shh! You’re making a noise. This poor baby will
never get to sleep.
COOK: (stirring the soup) I like making a noise. I like going: Crash!
Wallop! Bang! Don’t you?
ALICE: Sometimes, perhaps, but not all the time.
COOK: Would you like to hear my song?
ALICE: Well, I -
COOK: It’s a very good song!
PY
ALICE: I’m sure it is.
Y
COOK: It’s a very noisy song!
TO L
O
ALICE: I thought it might be.
N
C COOK: (to the audience) You’d like to hear it, wouldn’t you? (he has a
saucepan tucked under one arm and is hitting it threateningly with
AL O
a large spoon) Well, you’re going to hear it whether you like it or

not! This is it, and it’s called: Crash! Wallop! and Bang!
G E
SONG 8: Crash! Wallop! And Bang!

L
COOK: Crash! Wallop! and Bang!

I sing it as loud as I can.
LE P
I throw in more pepper

To make it taste better,
IL M
And stir it up on a giant pan.

Crash! Wallop! and Bang!
I make as much noise as I can.
SA
I love to batter
And make such a clatter.
COOK: (to Alice) Did you like it?
ALICE: Yes ... it was very nice ... perhaps a little loud for the baby though.
COOK: (to the audience) Did you like it? I can’t hear you .... Did you like
it? You want me to sing it to you again? You want to sing with me?
Can you sing loudly? I hope so! Right, here we go:
The words of the song can be flown in on a songsheet if required
SONG 9 : Crash! Wallop! And Bang! repeat
16
COOK : Crash! Wallop! and Bang!
I love to batter
COOK: Mmm, not bad! But I thought you said you could sing loudly
though? Right! I tell you what I’m going to do. I am going to
split you up into three sections and we’ll have a competition. The
loudest section wins. (to the first section) Now you lot ... you’re
mine! We’re the “Crashes” Can you shout “Crash” as loudly as
possible? Let’s have a practice then. After three; One ... two ...
three: “Crash!”
PY
Y
CHESHIRE CAT: (in a soft, silky voice) And I’ll have this little lot in the middle. (to
TO L the second section of the audience) We’ll be the “Wallops”. Mmm,
I thought you’d like that! Now, I want you all to shout “Wallop”
O
as loudly as you can after I count to three; one ... two ... three:
N
Wallop!” That’ll do very nicely!
C
AL O
ALICE: (to the third section of the audience) So you must be mine, I
suppose. Well, I think we’re going to be the best lot. Now, can you
all shout “Bang”? I want to hear you: “Bang!” And again ... even
G E
louder: “Bang!” We’re bound to win.

L
COOK: Are you all ready then? We’ll have one practice shout. After three;
all together: one ... two ... three: (the audience shout out their word
LE P
encouraged by the Cook, the Cheshire Cat and Alice) Now, when
we get to your word in the song you have to shout it out as loudly
IL M
as you can. Are you all ready? Ready “Crashes”?

SA
CHESHIRE CAT: Ready “Wallops”?
ALICE: Ready “Bangs”?
COOK: Here we go then.
SONG 10: Crash! Wallop! And Bang!
ALL WITH Crash! Wallop! and Bang!

I love to batter
17
COOK: My lot won!
ALICE: No they didn’t!
CHESHIRE CAT: My “Wallops” were the loudest, weren’t you?
The Cook, Alice and the Cheshire Cat start to argue
COOK: (eventually calling a truce) We’ll have to sing it one more time.
Then we’ll find out the winners. (to the audience) Right?
The song is sung once more with the Audience. At the end of the
song, the Cook returns to the cauldron, the Cheshire cat curls up
on the hearth, and Alice nurses the baby
ALICE: (to the baby) I know! Shh! Shh! It was a very loud song, wasn’t
PY
it? (the baby grunts) Don’t grunt; that’s not at all a proper way of
expressing yourself. Perhaps it was only sobbing. (she looks at the
Y
baby’s face) It’s not sobbing... it’s grunting ... just like a pig. (she
TO L stares at the baby who continues to grunt) It is a pig! (she holds the
O
pig up for the audience to see) It’s not a baby at all, at least not any
N
longer. What on earth am I going to do with this creature when I
C get it home? Perhaps the Duchess will come back for it. (she places
the pig on the stool) There! Don’t grunt! (to the audience) If it had
AL O
grown up it would have made a dreadfully ugly child; but it makes

a rather a handsome pig. Still, there are a few children I know who
might do very well as pigs! I think it’s time to be moving on. (she
G E
pauses then approaches the Cheshire Cat) Cheshire Puss, could

you tell me which way I ought to go from here?
L
LE P
CHESHIRE CAT: That depends on where you want to get to, doesn’t it?
IL M
ALICE: I don’t really care ... but I don’t want to meet the Queen. She
sounds ... well ... not very nice. Otherwise I don’t really mind
where I get to.
SA
CHESHIRE CAT: Then it doesn’t matter which way you go.
ALICE: But I want to get somewhere.
CHESHIRE CAT: Oh, you’re sure to do that - if you walk for long enough.
ALICE: What sort of people live around here?
CHESHIRE CAT: (pointing to the left) Well in that direction lives a Hatter, and in
that direction ... (he points to the right) ... lives a March Hare. Visit
either you like: they’re both mad.
ALICE: But I’ve had enough of mad people.
18
CHESHIRE CAT: We’re all mad here. I’m mad! Even you’re mad!
ALICE: How do you know I’m mad?
CHESHIRE CAT: You must be, or you wouldn’t have come here. (to the audience)
And you must be mad as well or you wouldn’t have come here
either!
ALICE: And why do you think you’re mad?
CHESHIRE CAT: Well to begin with ... a dog’s not mad, is it?
ALICE: No, but -
CHESHIRE CAT: You see, a dog growls when it’s angry and wags its tail when it’s
pleased. Now I growl when I’m pleased and wag my tail when I’m
PY
angry. Therefore: I’m mad!
Y
ALICE: I call it purring, not growling.
TO L
O
CHESHIRE CAT: By-the-bye, what happened to the baby? I almost forgot to ask.
N
C ALICE: It turned into a pig.
AL O
CHESHIRE CAT: I thought it would. (he exits)
ALICE: What a strange cat! I’ve never seen a cat with such an enormous
G E
grin before. Now ... (she ponders in thought) Which way? I’ve
seen Hatters before. The March Hare sounds most interesting, and
L
perhaps as this is not March, it won’t be raving mad. Anyway,

LE P
perhaps the Cheshire Cat was right about me. Perhaps I’m mad.
Perhaps we’re all mad. (to the audience) Even you! Now ... which
IL M
way?
Alice starts to exit as the lights fade

SA
Scene Four
The Mad Hatter’s tea party
The room is full of clocks of varying size and description, all of

which show the time at 6 o’clock. A grandfather clock lying on its
side, forms a table which is laid up for tea for a large number. The
Mad Hatter, the March Hare and the Dormouse are sitting along
one side of the table squashed up together. The Dormouse, who is
asleep, is in between the other two, both of whom have their elbows
resting on him
Alice enters. She walks over to the table and sits down elegantly in
the large chair at the head
19
HATTER & (on noticing Alice) No room! No room!
MARCH HARE:
ALICE: (indignantly) There’s plenty of room.
MARCH HARE: Have some wine.
ALICE: I can’t see any wine.
HATTER: There isn’t any! (he shrieks with laughter)
ALICE: Then it wasn’t very civil of you to offer me some.
MARCH HARE: It wasn’t very civil of you to sit down without being invited.
ALICE: I didn’t know it was your table. It’s laid out for a great many more
PY
than three.
Y
HATTER: Your hair wants cutting.
TO L
O
ALICE: You shouldn’t make personal remarks. It’s very rude.
N
C HATTER: Why is a raven like a writing desk?
AL O
ALICE: Oh, I’m quite good at riddles. I think I should be able to guess that.
MARCH HARE: Do you mean that you think you can find out an answer to it?
G E
ALICE: Yes, I -
L
LE P
MARCH HARE: Then you should say what you mean.

IL M
ALICE: I do ... at least I ... at least I mean what I say - that’s the same thing,
you know.
SA
HATTER: No it isn’t! You might just as well say that “I see what I eat” is the
same thing as “I eat what I see”.
DORMOUSE: (sleepily) You might just as well say that “I breathe when I sleep” is
the same thing as “I sleep when I breathe”.
HATTER: (to the Dormouse) In my case it is the same thing. (he lets out a
shriek of laughter) Have you guessed the riddle yet?
ALICE: (sighing) No, I give up. What’s the answer?
HATTER: I haven’t the faintest idea! (he shrieks with laughter again)
The Hatter and the March Hare prod the Dormouse who sleepily
joins in the laughter
20
HATTER: (when the laughter has subsided) What day of the month is it? (he
takes out his pocket watch and looks at it)
ALICE: (after pausing to think) The fourth.
HATTER: (sighing) Two days wrong! (to the March Hare) I told you butter
wouldn’t suit the works.
MARCH HARE: It was the best butter.
HATTER: I dare say it was, but some crumbs must have got in as well. You
shouldn’t have put it in with the bread-knife.
MARCH HARE: (taking the watch and dipping it into his cup of tea) It was the best
butter, you know.
PY
ALICE: What a funny watch! It tells you the day of the month, but it
doesn’t tell you what o’clock it is!
Y
TO LHATTER: Why should it? Does your watch tell you what year it is?
O
N
ALICE: Of course not.
C HATTER: Any why not?

AL O
ALICE: Because it stays the same year for such a long time; you don’t need
to be reminded of it all the time.
G E
HATTER: Which is just the case with mine!

L
LE P
ALICE: I don’t understand.

IL M
HATTER: (impatiently) I’m not surprised you don’t. It’s all a matter of time,
you see ... time!
SA
ALICE: What’s a matter of time?
HATTER: (putting away his watch) Everything’s a matter of time.
ALICE: (bravely) Well, I think you might do something better with the time
than wasting it sitting here making silly remarks that don’t make
sense at all, and asking riddles with no answers.
HATTER: If you knew Time as well as I do, you wouldn’t talk about wasting
it; it’s him!
ALICE: I don’t know what you mean.
HATTER: Of course you don’t. I shouldn’t think you’ve ever spoken to Time.
21
ALICE: Perhaps not; but I know I have to beat time when I learn music.
HATTER: Ah! That accounts for it! He won’t stand beating. Now if you only
keep on good terms with Time, he’ll do almost anything you like
with the clock. For instance: suppose it were nine o’clock in the
morning, just time to begin lessons; you’d only have to whisper a
hint to Time, and round goes the clock in a twinkling! Half-past
twelve: time for lunch.
MARCH HARE: (muttering to himself) I wish it was!
ALICE: Well, that would be rather nice, I suppose, but the problem is: I
wouldn’t be ready for lunch, would I?
HATTER: Not a first, I grant you. But you could keep it at half-past twelve for
as long as you liked.
PY
ALICE: And is that what you do?
Y
TO LHATTER: (mournfully shaking his head) Not I! We quarrelled, Time and I,
O
last March! (pointing to the March Hare and lowing his voice) On
N
the thirteenth, to be precise; just before he went mad. Now he won’t
C do a thing I ask. It’s always six o’clock.

AL O
ALICE: Is that why there are so many tea things laid out?
HATTER: Precisely so. It’s always tea-time, and we’ve no time to wash the
G E
things between whiles.

L
ALICE: Then you keep moving round the table, I suppose.

LE P
HATTER: Exactly!
IL M
SONG 11: It’s All A Matter Of Time

SA
HATTER: It’s all a matter of time, you see.
HATTER & It’s all a matter of time, you see.

MARCH HARE:
HATTER: Time for you, and time for me.
HATTER & Time for you, and time for me.

MARCH HARE:
HATTER: At six o’clock it’s time for tea.
HATTER & At six o’clock it’s time for tea.

MARCH HARE:
HATTER: It’s all a matter of time.
ALL: It’s all a matter of time.

Tick-tock goes the clock,
22
The hands race around the face;
HATTER: 60 seconds make a minute:
MARCH HARE: 60 minutes make an hour:
DORMOUSE: 24 hours make a day;
ALL: And that is why we always say:

It’s all a matter of time, you see,
It’s all a matter of time.
Matter of time!
It’s all a matter of time!
HATTER: It’s all a matter of time, you know
ALL: It’s all a matter of time, you know.
PY
HATTER: However fast, however slow.
Y
ALL: However fast, however slow.
TO LHATTER: From side to side and head to toe.
O
N
ALL: From side to side and head to toe.
C HATTER: It’s all a matter of time.

AL O
ALL: It’s all a matter of time.

Tick-tock goes the clock,
G E
HATTER: 60 seconds make a minute;

L
MARCH HARE: 60 minutes make an hour;

LE P

IL M

SA

Matter of time!
MARCH HARE: I vote the young lady tells us a story.
ALICE: I’m afraid I don’t know one.
HATTER: Then the Dormouse shall. (he pours a little hot tea on the
Dormouse’s nose) Wake up, Dormouse.
DORMOUSE: I wasn’t asleep. I heard every word you were saying.
MARCH HARE: Then tell us a story!
ALICE: Oh yes, please do!

23
HATTER: And be quick about it, or you’ll be asleep again before it’s done.
DORMOUSE: (quickly) Once upon a time there were three little sisters, and their
names were Elsie, Lacie, and Tillie; and they lived at the bottom of
a well.
ALICE: What did they live on?
DORMOUSE: (after pausing for thought) They lived on treacle.
ALICE: (gently) They couldn’t have done that, they’d have been ill.
DORMOUSE: Oh, but they were: very ill!
ALICE: But why did they live at the bottom of a well?
PY
MARCH HARE: (to Alice) Have some more tea.
Y
ALICE: I haven’t had my yet, so I can’t have more.
TO L
O
HATTER: You mean you can’t have less. It’s very easy to have more than
N
nothing.
C ALICE: Nobody asked your opinion.

AL O
HATTER: (triumphantly) Who’s making personal remarks now?

G E
ALICE: (ignoring the Hatter and turning to the Dormouse) Why did they
live at the bottom of the well?
L
LE P
DORMOUSE: (after thinking) It was a treacle well.

IL M
ALICE: There’s no such thing.
HATTER & Shh! Shh!

SA
MARCH HARE:
DORMOUSE: If you can’t be civil, you’d better finish the story yourself.
ALICE: No, please go on. I won’t interrupt again. I promise.
DORMOUSE: And so these three little sisters - they were learning to draw you
know.
ALICE: What did they draw?
The Hattter and March Hare look at Alice sharply
DORMOUSE: Treacle!
24
ALICE: I don’t think -
HATTER: Then you shouldn’t talk! (he shrieks with laughter)
ALICE: (standing up angrily) This is the stupidest tea-party I have ever

been to in all my life! I haven’t got the time to -
HATTER: The time?
MARCH HARE: Time to be moving round the table, I think.
DORMOUSE: Yes! I want a clean cup.
Everyone moves round the table
HATTER: Now, where were we, oh yes: (he taps on the table with a spoon
PY
for silence and then stands up. The other two stand up as well. He
conducts with the spoon)
Y
TO L SONG 12: All A Matter of Time and Late For A Date (reprise)
O
ALL: Tick-tock goes the clock,
N
C
AL O
HATTER: 60 seconds make a minute;
MARCH HARE: 60 minutes make an hour;

G E

L

LE P

Matter of time!
IL M
ALICE: (spoken) I think it’s time I left.

SA
Alice gets up from the table and starts to exit. Suddenly the White
Rabbit rushes in
WHITE RABBIT: (spoken) I’m late! I’m so terriby late!
HATTER: (spoken) Late?
HATTER: It’s all a matter of time.
HATTER, MARCH HARE &

DORMOUSE: It’s all a matter,
It’s all a matter,
WHITE RABBIT: I’m late for a date.
25
ALL: He’s late for a date;
He’s terribly, terribly, terribly late.
Everyone starts to dance
To be late for a date with anyone is a terrible thing to be.

So you see;
Now you know;
WHITE RABBIT: Why I simpy have to go.
ALL: So you see;

Now you know;
WHITE RABBIT: Why I simply have to -
ALL: Why he simply has to -

Simply has to ....
PY
The Hatter approaches the White Rabbitt who is still frantically
rushing about the stage
Y
TO LHATTER: Your watch .....
O
WHITE RABBIT: What about it?
N
C HATTER: (announcing) It’s not working!
AL O
WHITE RABBIT: Not working! (he holds it up in front of his face to inspect it, taps it
twice, then sighs heavily) It’s not working.
G E
HATTER: Precisely! (pointing to all the clocks in the room) It’s six o’clock!
L
LE P
WHITE RABBIT: (brightly) Six O’clock?

IL M
HATTER: Precisely!
WHITE RABBIT: (looking around) You’re right! It is six o’clock. My appointment

SA
isnt’ until half past six!
MARCH HARE: You’ll stay for tea, then?
WHITE RABBIT: Thank you!
The White Rabbit rushes to the table and picks up a cup and saucer.
After a few moments Alice speaks
ALICE: But it’s always six o’clock here.
There is a sudden silence. After a moment the Hatter speaks
HATTER: I thought you were leaving.
ALICE: (calmly) Your watch isn’t working either. You said so earlier. None
26
of the clocks in this room are working.
HATTER: I beg your pardon?
ALICE: All the clocks in this room have said six o’clock since the twelfth
of March.
MARCH HARE: The thirteenth actually.
ALICE: (wearily) The thirteenth then.
WHITE RABBIT: (in a panic) Than I am late!
HATTER: Now look what you’ve done.
WHITE RABBIT: (frantically) I’m 271 days late.
PY
HATTER &
Y
MARCH HARE: (to Alice) This is all your fault.
TO L
O
ALICE: I’m sorry, I didn’t think -
N
C HATTER: You never do!
AL O
SONG 13: All A Matter of Time & Late For A Date (2nd reprise)
WHITE RABBIT: I’m late for a date.

G E
ALL: He’s late for a date.

L
He’s terribly, terribly, terribly late.

LE P
Everyone starts to dance again

IL M
ALL: To be late for a date with anyone is a terrible thing to be.

So you see;
Now you know;
SA
WHITE RABBIT: Why I simply have to go.
ALL: So you see;

Now you know;
We hope you enjoyed this sample script of Alice in Wonderland by
Mike Carter.
To purchase the full script, please head to
www.maverickmusicals.com
27

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ALICE IN WONDERLAND

Enquiries should be addressed to the publishers.

Copyright © 1989 Maverick Musicals Pty Ltd

ABN: 83 010 760 513

ALICE IN WONDERLAND was first

The adaptation draws out all the

C Card Gardener number 7

The Queen of Hearts

This Musicals can be performed with a cast of just 8 adults:

Alice is played by the same actress throughout.

Scene 1: Alice meets The White Rabbit

Scene 3: The Duchess’s Kitchen

Song 7: Wow! Wow! Wow! The Duchess

Song 8: Crash! Wallop! and Bang! The Cook

Scene 4: The Mad Hatter’s Tea Party

Song 11: It’s all a Matter of Time The Hatter,

and March Hare

Scene 1: The Palace Gardens

Song 14: Painting the Roses Red The Card Gardeners

Scene 2: Tweedledum and Tweedledee

Scene 4: The Courtroom

Song 25: Wonderland Alice, Ensemble

Alice meets the White Rabbit

The White Rabbit, in his waistcoat and tailed morning coat, is

Alice is sitting on a grassy bank; she is playing a game of patience

SONG 1: Late For A Date With The Duchess

WHITE RABBIT: I’m late for a date with The Duchess,

My whiskers and my fur!

Then don’t pick her!

A terrible thing to be;

Why I simply have to go!

Alice starts to laugh

(sings) I’m late for a date with The Duchess,

ALICE: But - (to audience) I wonder why he’s is such a hurry?

The White Rabbit disappears off-stage down a rabbit hole

Wait! Wait for me!

The White rabbit has gone. Alice, in pursuit, starts to descend.

(without real dismay) Oh! Oh! I’m falling! What a strange

The doors are mounted onto triangular shaped trucks with

I’m shrinking! I’m shrinking! I’m shutting up like a telescope!

SONG 2: Curiouser and Curiouser (part one)

ALICE: Curiouser and curiouser.

The lighting returns to normal

SONG 3: Curiouser and Curiouser (part two)

ALICE: Curiouser and curiouser,

back where we started, only now the stage is full of suspended

sound of splashing water

At least I’m a sensible height now. (she splutters as she swims

I was tall. It looks as if I might even drown in my own tears. (to

MOUSE: We indeed! As if I should talk on such a subject! Our family always

ALICE: (shaking herself in an effort to get dry) I’m soaking wet.

DODO: Then I suggest an energetic remedy to resolve the perplexities of

the present predicament.

DUCK: Speak English! Quack! I don’t understand the meaning of half

those long words.

ALICE: What’s a Caucus Race?

During the song everyone on stage rushes about in any direction

SONG 4: Caucus Race

DODO: Run here, run there,

There is a short instrumental passage as the “race” continues

ALL: Run here, run there,

DUCK: Oh yes, please. I did enjoy it. Quack!

DODO: (still very aloof) You do, do you?

DODO: Out of the question!