The

hell on Utya Island

Written by Prableen Kaur on Prableen.origo.no Translated from Norwegian to English by Sofie Heilmann. Im awakening. I cant sleep anymore. Im sitting in living room. Feeling sorrow, anger, happiness, God I dont know what. Its too many feelings. There are too many thoughts. Im frightened. I react on every little sound. Im now writing about what happened on Utya. What my eyes saw, what I felt, what I did. The words are coming straight from the heart, but I will in same time anonymize many names in respect of my friends. We had had a crisis meeting in the main building after the explosion in Oslo. After that it was a meeting for members from Akershus and Oslo. After the meetings many, many was in the main building. We comforted each other with the knowledge of that we were safe on this island. No one had any idea of that the hell would break out, out here at us too. I was in main entre when the panic broke out. I heard shots. I saw him shoot. Everyone started running. The first thought was: Why is the police shooting on us? What the hell!? I ran into the little room. People ran. Screamed. I was terrified. I made it back to one of the room back in the building. We were many in this room. We were lying on the floor all of us. I heard more shots. Got even more terrified. I cried. I realised nothing. I saw my best friend through the window and thought if I should go out and take him with me. I didnt do it. I saw the fear in his eyes. We stayed on the floor in the room in few minutes. We agreed not to let more in to the room in case of the murder would come. We heard more shots and decided to jump out of the window. The panic broke out between us. Everyone tried to get out of the window first. I was the last one and thought: Im the last one who is jumping out of the window. Now I die. Im sure of that, but its maybe good, because I know that the other are safe. I threw my bag out of the window. Tried to climb down, but lost the grip. I landed hard on the left part of my body. A guy helped me up. We ran into the forest. I looked around. Is he here? Is he shooting against me? Will he see me? a girl had broken her ankle. Another one was hurt badly. I tried to help a bit before I continued toward the water. I sought cover behind a kind of brick wall. We were many. I prayed, prayed, prayed. I hoped God saw me. I called mom and said it wasnt sure that we would meet again, but that I would do everything to survive. I told her several times that I love her. I heard the fear in her voice. She cried. It hurt. I sent a text message to dad, told him that I love him. I sent text message to another person who I really like. We kept a little in touch. I texted my best friend. He didnt replaid. We heard more shots. We crawled together. Did everything to keep the warmth. There were so many thoughts. I was so terrified. Dad called. I cried, told him that I love him. He said he was on the way with my brother to receive me when I would come to the mainland or they would come to the island. There were so many feelings. So many thoughts. I prayed all I could. Some time passed on. The other called their parents, but started to text instead of fear that the murder would hear us. I thought of my sister who was out of country. How would I tell her about how it went? About what happened to me. I updated my Twitter and Facebook that I was still alive and that I was safe. I wrote that I was waiting for

the police. People jumped out to the water, started swimming. I stayed. I decided that if he came, I would play dead. I wouldnt run or swim. I cant describe the fear, all the thoughts, what I felt. A man came. Im from the police. I didnt move. Someone screamed to him, that he had to prove it. I dont remember exactly what he said, but the murder started shooting. He refilled. Shot more. He shot those around me. I stayed. I thought: Now its over. He is here. He is taking me. Now I die. People screamed. I heard that other got shot. Other jumped out in the water. I just laid there. My mobile in hand. I was lying on the top of legs of a girl. Two other were lying on my legs. I stayed. Text messages were sent to my mobile. My mobile called several times. I stayed. I played dead. I was lying there for least an hour. It was quiet. I turned my head carefully to see if any was alive. I saw bodies. I saw blood. Fear. I decided to get up. I was lying on a body. Two bodies on me. I had guardian angels. I didnt know if he would come back. I didnt have the courage to see all who called and texted me. I hurried to the water. Took off my sweater. It was big. I thought it would be difficult to swim with it. I evaluated if I should bring my phone or leave it. I put it in my hip pocket. I saw several out in the water. They had swum long. I saw that some hung on a floating airboat or something like that. There were many who got picked up as they swam over there. I swam, swam and swam against the airboat. I screamed. Cried. Got cold. Thought that now I would drown. It got heavier and heavier. I prayed. I continued. Got tired in my arms. Decided to turn on back and just use the legs to swim. I sank. I started swim normal again. For a short while I thought they moved away. I screamed. Begged them to wait for me. I must have seen things. I swam few hundred meters (around 500 feet) till I reached them. We spoke a bit together. Told what our names were, where we were from. When the boats passed us, we screamed for help. A man in a boat came to us. He threw out lifejackets to us. I got one. Pulled it on. I stuck myself on the airboat until the same man came back to pick us up. All of us came up in the boat. He started to sail to main land. After a while, hes little boat got water in. I did everything to get the most of the water out of the boat. I got tired. Another girl in boat took over. We came to main land. We got blankets. The tears pressed on. I cried more. A woman hugged me. It was so good. I cried aloud. I sobbed. A man borrowed his phone. I called dad: Im alive. I made it. Now Im safe. I hung up. Cried more. We had to walk a bit. Strangers took us in their cars and drove us to Sundvollen hotel. I ran in to see if I could find my best friend. I couldnt see him anywhere. I saw a friend. I cried loud. We hugged each other for long time. It was good. I walked around, looked for friends. My heart beat hard. I cried more. I registered at police and looked through all lists. I didnt know if my best friend was alive. I looked through all lists. I couldnt find his name anywhere. I was terrified. I got a duvet. Took of my wet socks. I was half naked. Got a jacket. I tried to sleep a bit. Contacted my parents again. Dad and brother were on way to pick me up. I drank a bit chocolate drink. Sat down. Thought. Cried. Saw more friends. Hugged them. Cried. I borrowed a data. Updated Facebook and Twitter again about that I was safe. I was in hotel several hours before my family arrived. I looked for known faces. Spoke to a priest. I told him everything I saw. It was a good conversation. A man from Red Cross looked through my sores. Cleaned them. Time went. I was with some of my friends. All spoke about the same thing. How we survived. Of what happened. I asked some if

they had seen my best friend. No one had seen him. I got terrified. Thought it was my fault, because we didnt manage to stay together. A friend got a key card to a room. We sat there and saw news. There were anger, sorrow, and so many feelings. Dad called about they arrived just now. I took the elevator down. Ran out to them. Hugged my brother and dad long time. I cried aloud. My brother cried too. It was a good moment. I saw a guy who looked like my best friend. I yelled his name. He turned around. It was him. We hugged each other long time. Both cried, asked each other about how we made it. After a while I registered myself out and we drove home. Some drove with us. My best friend was with me home. His brother was at my home with his best friend. There were several who had gathered at my home. They wouldnt go home before they had seen that I was good. We spoke a bit. I drank juice. Ate yoghurt. Spoke a bit more with my mom and my family. I called to my best girlfriend. It was a good conversation. She said: I wasnt sure if I ever would get this call. Tears squeezed. We spoke a bit. After that I went to bed. It was 3am. Mom wouldnt let me sleep alone, so we slept together. It has been few hours after all this happened. Im still in shock. Everything hasnt gone through yet. I have seen bodies of my friends. More of my friends are missed. Im happy that Im alive. Cos God took care of me. There are so many feelings, so many thoughts. Im thinking of all the relatives. Of all of them Ive lost. Of the hell that was and still is on the island. Summers most beautiful adventure has been transformed into Norways worst nightmare.