Goosey Goosey and other answers.

Bamber Gascoigne: What was Gandhi's first name?

Contestant: Goosey, goosey?

Name the funny men who once entertained kings and queens at court.
Contestant: Lepers.

Greg Scott: We're looking for an occupation beginning with 'T'.

Contestant: Doctor.
Scott: No, it's 'T'. 'T' for Tommy. 'T' for Tango. 'T' for Tintinnabulation.
Contestant: Oh, right . . . (pause) . . . Doctor.

Kelly: Which French Mediterranean town hosts a famous film festival every year?
Contestant: I don't know, I need a clue.
Kelly: OK. What do beans come in?
Contestant: Cartons?

Jamie Theakston: Where do you think Cambridge University is?

Contestant: Geography isn't my strong point.
Theakston: There's a clue in the title.
Contestant: Leicester.

Stewart White: Who had a worldwide hit with What A Wonderful World?
Contestant: I don't know.
White: I'll give you some clues: what do you call the part between your hand
and your elbow?
Contestant: Arm.
White: Correct. And if you're not weak, you're . . .?
Contestant: Strong.
White: Correct - and what was Lord Mountbatten's first name?
Contestant: Louis.
White: Well, there we are then. So who had a worldwide hit with the song
What A Wonderful World?
Contestant: Frank Sinatra?

Alex Trelinski: What is the capital of Italy?

Contestant: France.
Trelinski: France is another country. Try again.
Contestant: Oh, um, Benidorm.
Trelinski: Wrong, sorry, let's try another question. In which country is the Parthenon?
Contestant: Sorry, I don't know.
Trelinski: Just guess a country then.
Contestant: Paris.

Jeremy Paxman: What is another name for 'cherrypickers' and 'cheesemongers'?

Contestant: Homosexuals.
Paxman: No. They're regiments in the British Army who will be very upset with you.

Anne Robinson: Oscar Wilde, Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer have all written books about their
experiences in what: prison, or the Conservative Party?
Contestant: The Conservative Party.

DJ Mark: For Pounds 10, what is the nationality of the Pope?

Ruth from Rowley Regis: I think I know that one. Is it Jewish?
 Goosey Goosey and other answers.
Anne Robinson: In traffic, what 'J' is where two roads meet?
Contestant: Jool carriageway?

Presenter: What happened in Dallas on November 22, 1963?

Contestant: I don't know, I wasn't watching it then.

Presenter: What is the name of the long- running TV comedy show about pensioners: Last Of
The ...?
Caller: Mohicans.

Greg Scott: We're looking for a word that goes in front of 'clock'.
Contestant: Grandfather.
Scott: Grandfather clock is already up there, say something else.
Contestant: Panda.

Phil: What's 11 squared?

Contestant: I don't know.
Phil: I'll give you a clue. It's two ones with a two in the middle.
Contestant: Is it five?

Q: Which American actor is married to Nicole Kidman?

A: Forrest Gump.

Leslie: On which street did Sherlock Holmes live?

Contestant: Er . . .
Leslie: He makes bread .. .
Contestant: Er . . .
Leslie: He makes cakes .. .
Contestant: Kipling Street?

Presenter: In what year was President Kennedy assassinated?

Contestant: Erm .. .
Presenter: Well, let's put it this way - he didn't see 1964.
Contestant: 1965?

Phil Tufnell: How many Olympic Games have been held?

Contestant: Six.
Tufnell: Higher!
Contestant: Five.

Q: What's the Prince of Wales's Christian name?

A: Err . . .
Q: Here's a clue: he was married to Diana.
A: Err . . .
Q: It begins with a 'C'.
A: No idea.

Graham Dene: What was the name of Tony Blair's chief spin-doctor who resigned last year?
Contestant: Iain Duncan Smith.

Jodie Marsh: Arrange these two groups of letters to form a word - CHED and PIT.
Team: Chedpit.
 Goosey Goosey and other answers.
Presenter: Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?
Contestant: Barcelona.
Presenter: I was really after the name of a country.
Contestant: I'm sorry, I don't know the names of any countries in Spain.

Presenter: How many toes would three people have in total?

Contestant: 23.

Jeff Owen: In which country is Mount Everest?

Contestant (long pause): Er, it's not in Scotland, is it?

Girdler: I'm looking for an island in the Atlantic whose name includes the letter 'e'.
Contestant: Ghana.
Girdler: No, listen. It's an island in the Atlantic Ocean.
Contestant: New Zealand.

Question: What is the world's largest continent?

Contestant: The Pacific

Presenter: Name a film starring Bob Hoskins that is also the name of a famous painting by
Leonardo Da Vinci.
Contestant: Who Framed Roger Rabbit?

What was signed to bring World War I to an end in 1918?

Contestant: Magna Carta.

O'Brien: How many kings of England have been called Henry?

Contestant: Er, well, I know there was a Henry the Eighth ... er . . .. er . . three?

Eamonn Holmes: There are three states of matter: solid, liquid and what?
Contestant: Jelly.

Allinson: What international brand shares its name with the Greek goddess of victory?
Contestant (after long deliberation): Erm, Kellogg's?

Girl: Name a book written by Jane Austen.

Boy: Charlotte Bronte.

Steve Penk: What is the name of the French-speaking Canadian state?

Contestant: America? Portugal? Canada? Mexico? Italy? Spain?

Searle: In which European country is Mount Etna?

Caller: Japan.
Searle: I did say which European country, so in case you didn't hear that, I can let you try
again.
Caller: Er . . . Mexico?

Gabby Logan: What is the county town of Kent?

Contestant: Kentish Town?

Ulrika Jonsson: Who wrote Lord of the Rings?

Contestant: Enid Blyton
 Goosey Goosey and other answers.
DLT: In which European country are there people called Walloons?
Contestant: Wales.

Paul Wappat: How long did the Six-Day War between Egypt and Israel last?
Contestant (after long pause): Fourteen days.

Eamonn Holmes: Dizzy Gillespie is famous for playing . .. what?

Contestant: Basketball.

Jeff Owen: Where did the D-Day landings take place?

Contestant (after pause): Pearl Harbour?

Daryl Denham: In which country would you spend shekels?

Contestant: Holland?
Denham: Try the next letter of the alphabet.
Contestant: Iceland? Ireland?
Denham (helpfully): It's a bad line. Did you say Israel?
Contestant: No.

Wood: What 'K' could be described as the Islamic Bible?

Contestant: Er . . .
Wood: It's got two syllables . . . Kor . . .
Contestant: Blimey?
Wood: Ha ha ha ha, no. The past participle of run . . ..
Contestant: (Silence)
Wood: OK, try it another way. Today I run, yesterday I . . .
Contestant: Walked?

Dale Winton: Skegness is a seaside resort on the coast of which sea: a) Irish Sea, b) English
Channel, c) North Sea?
Contestant: Oh, I know that, you can start writing out the cheque now, Dale. It's on the east
coast, so it must be the Irish Sea.

Melanie Sykes: What is the name given to the condition where the sufferer can fall asleep at
any time?
Contestant: Nostalgic.

Presenter: What religion was Guy Fawkes?

Contestant: Jewish.
Presenter: That's close enough.

Chris Moyles: Which 'S' is a kind of whale that can grow up to 80 tonnes?
Contestant: Ummm .. .
Moyles: It begins with 'S' and rhymes with 'perm'.
Contestant: Shark.

Wright: Johnny Weissmuller died on this day. Which jungle-swinging character clad only in a
loincloth did he play?
Contestant: Jesús.

Name a bird with a Long Neck? - Naomi Campbell

Name a dangerous race..............The Arabs

 Goosey Goosey and other answers.
Les Dennis: 'Name something red.' Contestant: 'My cardigan.'

Which bird lays its eggs in another bird's nest?' The contestant mused, 'Well it's not a cuckoo -
that lives in a clock...' 

In UK geography, the road called Watling Street that now forms part of the A5 was originally
built by which civilisation?

She said: Apes

On which day is Christmas celebrated each year?

They said: Wednesday

What’s the best ways to toast someone. The contestant answered, “On a grill.”

"Name something made of wool." Answer: "A sheep."

"Name a famous Willie." Answer: "Willie The Pooh."

"Name a vocalist known by only one name." Answer: "Michael Jackson."

The game is

called 'Mate Match'. The DJs call someone at work and ask if they are

married or seriously involved with someone. If the contestant answers

'yes', he or she is then asked 3 random yet highly personal questions.

The person is also asked to divulge the name of their partner with

(phone number) for verification. If their partner answers those same

three questions correctly, they both win the prize.

DJ: 'Hey! This is Ed on FOX-FM. Have you ever heard of 'Mate Match'?'

Contestant: 'Yes, I have.'

DJ: 'Great! Then you know we're giving away a trip to the Gold Coast if
you win. What is your name? First only please.'

Contestant: 'Brian.'
DJ: 'Brian, are you married or what?'
Brian: 'Yes, I am married.'
DJ: 'Thank you. Now, what is your wife's name? First only please.'
Brian: 'Sarah.'
DJ: 'Is Sara at work, Brian?'
Brian: (laughing) 'Yes, she's at work.'
DJ: 'Okay, first question - when was the last time you had sex?'
Brian: 'About 8 o'clock this morning.'
 Goosey Goosey and other answers.
DJ: 'Atta boy, Brian.'
Brian: (laughing sheepishly) 'Well...'
DJ: 'Question #2 - How long did it last?'
Brian: 'About 10 minutes.'
DJ: 'Wow! You really want that trip, huh? No one would ever have said that if a trip
wasn't at stake.'
Brian: 'Yeah, that trip sure would be nice.'
DJ: 'Okay. Final question. Where did you have sex at 8 o'clock this
morning?
Brian: 'On the kitchen table.'

Okay folks, I will put Brian on hold, get his wife's work number and call her up.
DJ: 'Okay audience; let's call Sarah, shall we?'
DJ: 'Sarah, this is Ed with FOX-FM. We are live on the air right now and

I've been talking with Brian for a couple of hours now.'

Sarah: (laughing) 'A couple of hours?'
DJ: 'Well, a while now. He is on the line with us. Brian knows not to give any\
answers away or you'll lose. Sooooooo... do you know the rules of 'Mate Match'?'
Sarah: 'No.'
DJ: 'Good!'
Brian: (laughing)
Sarah: (laughing) 'Brian, what the hell are you up to?'
Brian: (laughing) 'Just answer his questions honestly, okay? Be completely honest.'
DJ: 'Yeah yeah yeah. Sure. Now, I will ask you 3 questions, Sarah. If your answers
match Brian's answers, then the both of you will be off to the Gold Coast for 5 days
on us.
Sarah: (laughing) 'Yes.'
DJ: 'Alright. When did you last have sex, Sarah?'
Sarah: 'Oh God, Brian....uh, this morning before Brian went to work.'
DJ: 'What time?'
Sarah: 'Around 8 this morning.'
DJ: 'Very good. Next question. How long did it last?'
Sarah: '12, 15 minutes maybe.'
DJ: 'Hmmmm. That's close enough. I am sure she is trying to protect his
manhood. We've got one last question, Sarah. You are one question away
from a trip to the Gold Coast. Are you ready?'
Sarah: (laughing) 'Yes.'
DJ: 'Where did you have it?'
Sarah: 'OH MY GOD, BRIAN!! You didn't tell them that did you?'
Brian: 'Just tell him, honey.'
DJ: 'What is bothering you so much, Sarah?'
Sarah: 'Well...'
DJ: Come on Sarah.....where did you have it?

Sarah: 'Up the ****.....'