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Nicole Javier

Matthew Weinshenker

Work, Family, & Gender

November 14, 2022

Mothers Can Do It All: Single Mothers as Breadwinners in America

Introduction:

Is it possible to be both an ideal worker and parent? Adulthood is contingent on working

strenuously for 40 years while simultaneously combatting parenthood. The sociological

imagination depicts the notion that these personal troubles are usually affected by “public issues”

(Mills 1959) For many people, the strenuous efforts to maintain a work- life balance is

intrinsically overbearing resulting in burnout, stress, and overload. I conducted a semi-structured

interview of a parent in a working family to delineate the adversities for low-income families to

overcome the work-life conflicts that hinder their ability to financially provide for their families

as well as care for their children.

Literature Review:

Low income and working families are intrinsically “stuck'' as they find it exceedingly

difficult to attain social and economic mobility. A decline in “good jobs'' and occupational

segregation has elicited low income families being overrepresented in low-paying jobs that

provide little to no benefits. In fact, more low income families have been increasingly headed by

single- parent households. Today, over half of women are in the paid labor force. Most families

would prefer an egalitarian family life, with both partners equally involved in paid labor and

caregiving; however, not every household encompasses a two-parent household. Now more than

ever, mothers must meet the dual demands of work and child care. According to “Finding Time”
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by Heather Boushey, “In 2013, a woman was either the family breadwinner…or a cobreadwinner

in 73.9% of low-income families.” (Boushey 2016, p.86 ) Low income mothers find themselves

working longer hours and relying on kin to care for children. Boushey delineated the experience

of Janette Navarro, a young Starbucks barista and single mother who juggled with Starbucks’s

“just-in time” or the concept of solely knowing one’s schedule a day in advance (Boushey 2016,

p. 79) The “just-in-time” policy depicts the notion that low income workers are overrepresented

in jobs with erratic schedules and find themselves sacrificing family time and/or cutting back on

work in order to “balance” their work and family life. Furthermore, the jobs were so underpaid

that low income mothers began to rely on welfare benefits; however, the “welfare reform did not

ensure that jobs paid a “livable wage” or had the necessary benefits to address conflicts between

work and family.” (Boushey 2016, p. 84) Delores, a single mom from Virginia found that a pay

raise did not make life easier. “Her higher pay, however, disqualified her for food stamp

benefits…Delores had to take a second job.” (Boushey 2016, p. 84) Thus, though Delores

received a higher wage, this precipitated a “feedback loop” in which the lack of benefits

prompted her to obtain a second job in order to make ends meet.” (Boushey 2016, p. 84)

Impoverished women as well as immigrant mothers faced many challenges in the United States

such as low-paying jobs, lack of support in paid family leave, and affordable quality child care.

Immigrant workers were concentrated in what are considered to be “heavy jobs” which

conflicted with caregiving responsibilities.” (Straut- Eppsteiner 2020, p. 871 ) Low income

mothers and undocumented mothers struggle with time-based conflicts between work and family

because they suffer more pressure to conform to ideal worker standards out of fear of being fired

or laid off. In “The Work-Family Interface: An Introduction,” Sweet asserted that many mothers

spend abundant amounts of time “child rearing” detering from the perceptions of what an ideal
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worker is (Sweet 2014, p. 45 ) Specifically, mothers are obliged to “juggle” and abide by the

“balancing metaphor” caused from maintaining too many responsibilities and commitments.”

(Sweet 2014, p. 45) On the other hand, the “balancing metaphor” places the blame on the mother

as opposed to the public issues and notion that the work and family responsibilities are

unrealistically demanding. Intrinsically, work-family conflicts are contingent with time-based

conflicts in which “work or home duties absorb the hours or minutes available needed to fulfill

roles in the other domain .”(Sweet 2014, p. 46) Time-based conflicts can consist of working long

hours and neglecting household responsibilities. Correspondingly, strain–based conflicts can

result from tension, anxiety, or fatigue from the volume or intensity of role demands.” (Sweet

2014, p.47) Strain-based conflicts are the byproduct of the unrealistic demands of the workplace

combined with the household responsibilities and caring for children that causes unsatisfactory

outcomes in one's life.

Method:

In this paper, I examine the effects of balancing work as well as care for children as a

single parent. I conducted a semistructured interview with a family friend, Esther Watkis to

depict her past struggles of being both a single parent and a breadwinner. I asked her a series of

questions ranging from specific to vague questions to evoke conversation about her experiences

since migrating to America and having children. Esther has three children whose ages now range

from 21, 26, and 27. Esther was a single mother and the sole provider for her family when

raising her children and often found it difficult to balance paid labor and childcare. Nonetheless,

she received support from kin to help care for her children as she worked hard to financially

provide for them. Esther worked as a home health aide working long hours to provide for her

family. In this paper, I depict the adversities that hinder single mothers especially immigrant and
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low income mothers like Esther, to balance work and life while being overrepresented in low-

wage jobs.

Interview and Analysis:

The American Dream is the notion that America provides opportunities for individuals to

attain economic prosperity, upward mobility, and success. Esther Watkis migrated to the United

States in order to attain the American Dream and provide a better life for her children. Being

both a single mother and a breadwinner in her household conspicuously caused work and life

conflicts. Esther, who aspired to be a nurse when she was younger, found her aspirations being

sidetracked after having a child at a young age in Jamaica. Esther, a “transnational mother”

migrated to America from Jamaica and temporarily left her child in order to make a living in

America and support her family back home. Quickly, Esther realized that living in America is

not necessarily easy. America provides support for single mothers through the TANF program or

the Temporary Assistance for Needy Families, “in order to encourage work, the payments are

meager, time-limited, and typically include work requirements.” (Boushey 2016, p. 82) The

TANF program had strict time limits and recipients of the program were required to prove that

they were actively searching for a job in order to receive benefits. Esther went on welfare,

however, she was cognizant of the fact that she was obligated to seek employment. Earlier, I

quoted the experience of Delores who was a single mother in Virginia who’s wage increased but

caused her to be disqualified from food stamps. The welfare reform provided unrealistic

expectations to what was perceived to be a “livable wage.” (Boushey 2016, p. 84) Though Esther

relied on welfare in order to put food on the table, she strived to work longer hours to make ends

meet. However, like Delores, this also disqualified her from receiving food stamps. Nonetheless,

Esther, like many other women, prioritized paid labor force participation to help her family “get
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ahead.” (Straut-Eppsteiner 2020, p. 869 ) Esther took sole financial responsibility in her

household. In comparison, according to “De-Gendered Processes, Gendered Outcome” “most

respondents described their “ideal world” division of labor as something close to a 50/50 split.”

(Daminger 2020, p. 813) However, for a single mother like Esther, a division of labor was not

possible. Despite her hopes of attaining the American Dream, immigrant mothers were

overrepresented in low-wage jobs such as being susceptible to working “heavy jobs” (Straut-

Eppsteiner 2020, p. 871) These “heavy jobs” conflicted with caregiving responsibilities. Esther

worked in a demanding job which required her to perform many duties similar to those she was

neglecting in her own home due to “time-based conflicts.” (Sweet 2014, p. 46) Conversely, many

mothers feel compelled to face the “mommy-track,” or [their] career permanently sidetracked by

[their] commitment to mothering.” (Schwartz 1989) Women are intrinsically not perceived to be

ideal workers because they often prioritize motherhood over the labor force. However, single

mothers like Esther, are essentially incapable of leaving the labor force because they will be

unable to financially support their family. Additionally, Eppsteiner asserted that “paid labor and

providing for one’s family was considered important, but focusing too much on paid work at the

expense of caregiving was associated with bad mothering (Eppsteiner 2020, p. 874) Collins,

1994).” For someone who’s both a single mother and a breadwinner, they are intrinsically

incapable of being an “intensive mother” as Hays depicted in “The Cultural Contradictions of

Motherhood.” Esther reported having feelings of guilt for working too many long hours and

relying on her grandmother to care for her children longer than expected. Immigrant mothers are

stigmatized for striving to “get ahead” and working longer hours to be able to provide for their

families. Esther worked as a home health aid, a job that is predominantly composed of low

income women. According to Finding Time, by Heather Boushey, “The median annual wage in
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2012 was about $20,820.” (Boushey 2016, p. 88) “I was working 12 hours a day, 5 days a week

and relied on the weekend to spend time with my family. A woman who is both a single mother

and a breadwinner is most likely incapable of being an “intensive mother” or capable of “child

rearing” (Hays 1996, p.1) Low income mothers instead “rely on informal kin of childcare.”

Hence, a reliance on kin played a large role in the support networks for people of color and low

income families in order to be able to “get ahead.” Esther, who had other family members in

America, relied on them to care for children when she worked longer hours. According to

Finding Time, by Heather Boushey, “...women and people of color typically have less control

over their schedules and so rely on family for nonstandard care. Similarly, Janette Navarro,

Starbucks worker and single mother, relied on her aunt, her aunt’s boyfriend and her own

boyfriend for help to take care of her children due to her “just-in-time scheduling” (Boushey

2016, p. 84) As her children grew older, Esther placed them in many after school activities and

programs. Not only was Esther working to provide for herself and her children, she was also

striving to provide for her family back home alongside with her other family members. “I was

expected to assist family members that were still living in Jamaica,” said Esther. Undocumented

mothers were overrepresented in low-wage jobs that do not provide benefits; however, they have

a duty and responsibility to help their family in need back home. Esther was grateful to have a

family in America to be able to care for her children. She stated, “ I don’t know how I would

have done it if I didn’t have a family to care for my children.” To Esther, an ideal parent is

“someone who is both striving to financially provide for their kids as well as finding as much

time as they can to care for their children. Effort is important; so, though we often feel like we

don’t have enough time, we’re still able to show our children that we are there for them.” As a

single mother, Esther wished that the labor force was inclusive and provided equitable benefits to
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women and people of color in society. Esther was a courageous mother who made sacrifices to

migrate to America to provide a better life for her children. Though life in America was

strenuous and full of adversities, Esther is happy with the decision she made.

Discussion and Conclusion:

Mothers can do it all. Mothers perform paid labor as well as “the second shift” of being a

parent. The ramifications of work-family conflicts are contingent on the expectation to be both

an ideal worker and an ideal parent in society. Balancing work and family life is strenuous for

women and people of color that are disproportionately represented in jobs that are underpaid and

lack benefits specifically for women such as paid-family leave and flexible scheduling.

Nonetheless, despite the work and family conflicts, a mother is still capable of maintaining a

nurturing and selfless relationship with their children. Single mothers must “find time” to be both

an ideal worker and an ideal parent in society, which sets unrealistic expectations and neglects

the systemic issues that precipitates these work and life conflicts.
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Works Cited Page:

Boushey, Heather. 2016. Finding Time: The Economics of Work-Life Conflict. Cambridge, MA:
Harvard University Press.

Daminger, Allison. 2020. “De-Gendered Processes, Gendered Outcomes: How Egalitarian

Couples Make Sense of Non-Egalitarian Household Practices.” American Sociological Review
85(5):806–29.

Hays, Sharon. 1956. “The Cultural Contradictions of Motherhood.” Social Forces 76(3):1159.

Straut‐Eppsteiner, Holly. 2020. “Undocumented Mothers and Work–Family Conflict in

Restrictive Policy Contexts.” Journal of Marriage and Family 83(3):865–80.

Sweet, Stephen. 2014. “The Work-Family Interface: An Introduction.”