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HAIRSPRAY SCRIPT

INTRO:
(Good Morning Baltimore)
(Nicest Kids in Town)
ELOY: Hurry! Hurry penny! the show is already starting!
Charwena: Im hurrying tracy!!
Zyra: Edna?! Is my laundry ready?
JOJE: who wants to know?.. Sure it is prudy come on up!.. that will be 3 dollars
Zyra: That’s pretty pricey for a pair of petty pants!
JOJE: well im sorry prudy but some of your personal stain required pounding with a
rock.
(masulod hi tracy and penny)
JOJE: 4 o’clock I guess I don’t have to ask you got detention again! Tracy turnblad
mind your manners say hello to our guest..
ELOY: Good morning Mrs. Pingleton
JOJE: And penny??
Charwena: Hello Mrs. Pingleton! I mean MOTHER!
JOJE: Look at them they just love this Corny Collin.
Zyra: They’re racist! I hate them and there colored music!
JOJE: Oh don’t be silly! There ain”t color the TV is black and white.
(Padayon Nicest kids in town)
Blessie: And we’re off! Alright people how many time do I havet to tell you we do not
touch ourselves anywhere while on camera! .. Tammy lose the padding you too
Fender! And Corny.. “Detroit Sound??” what’s that the cries of people getting
mugged?
Reymart: ah Velma the kids digs the rhythm and blues.
Blessie: Yeah they’re kids, corny, that’s why we have to steer them in the white
direction.
Reymart: You mean right direction
Blessie: That’s what I said!
Dulf: Amber. Its time
Dina: Ahhh
Blessie: Amber? Honey save your personal life for the camera… Okay and we are
back to corny in 5.. 4.. 3.. 2…1
Reymart: Are you an aspiring dancer? Well this is your chance for our loving Brenda
here will be taking a leave of absence from the show.. How long you gonna be gone
Brenda?
Brenda: (Awkward smile) Just nine months.
Reymart: Seems like we have an opeing here on the show for a girl just as fun-lovin’
but not as quite freewhellin’.
Dulf: So if you wanna be one of the nicest kids in town. Come down here at the
WYZT station tomorrow and audition.
ELOY: oh my god its a dream of a lifetime I have to audition!
Charwena; oh my god it’s a dream of a lifetime I have to watch you audition!
JOJE: No one is auditioning for anything and you young lady! Go tell your mother
she’s looking for you!
Charwena: Oh my! I have to go tracy my mother is looking for me!
ELOY: (moment) I don’t care what my mother told me this is my dream I need to
audition and be the next nicest kids in town!
(Corny show audition)
BLESSIE: May I see the list of our auditionee?
Paula: here you go!
Blessie: really that’s all?? This town sure has gone downhill since I was crowned
miss Baltimore crab.
ELOY: I cant believe were late again!
Charwena: All my life I imagined what this place would look like… this isn’t it.
ELOY: Hi there! Am I too late for the audition?
Blessie: Not too late.. just to much (evil laugh)
Charwena: Tracy look its link!
Eloy: Its him! He’s so near and yet so gorgeous!
Dulf: (laughing) I know.. those girls are all over me. (mabangga kan joje).. excuse me
little darling, I hope I didn’t uh dent your do.
(Eloy mahihimatay)
Blessie: And what are you doing here?
Joje: im here to audition for corny. My name is tracy turnblad and like you I go too
Patterson Park High.
Paula: Oh I see you.
Dina: who couldn’t missed her
Eloy: It’s always been my dream to dance on this show!
Dina: Ahh maybe you wanna go back to sleep!
Paula: Youre to wide from the back.
Dina: Honey, look at her front!
Blessie: Wait are we on candid camera? Okay, where’s Allen Funt?
Dina: Do you dance like you dress?
Dulf: Amber there’s no need to be cruel.
Blessie: Would you swim in an integrated pool?
(all shocked)
Eloy: I sure would! Im all for integration, it’s the new frontier!
Blessie: Not in Baltimore it isn’t. and may I be frank?
(miss Baltimore crab)
Joje: (for the sing) I know every step, I know every song, I know there’s a place
where I belong…. Why do they have to be so mean? Your short and stout? And
you’re not council material? I mean I came up with all this style, I keep my hair as
high as I can, but did they give me a chance? Encouragement? Appreciation? No!!
all I ever here is…
WARREN: Tracy Turnblad! Once again your monumental hair, has seriously affected
everyone’s view of the blackboard. As principal of Patterson park high I give you a 3
more days of detention.
ELOY:: detention?!! Is there no pity for a kid just trying to fit in?

Scene 2
(detention)
Olidan: Can I help you?
Eloy: that move swish! Does that dance have a name?
Olidan: Oh this? I call it the “Peyton Place After Midnight” I use it to attract the
opposite sex.
Eloy: Wow! That is so groovy! You’re really good
Olidan: why, thank you.
Eloy: so would it be kinda like this?
(for the dance)
Olidan: not bad for a white chick
Eloy: hey I know where ive seen you before.
Olidan: where
Eloy: On Corny’s show on Negro Day. Negro day is the best I wish everyday is
Negro Day.
Olidan: at our house, it is
(all laugh)
Eloy: Hey! Corny’s show is gonna be here tomorrow night I bet if he see me dancing
with you guys he’ll put me in the show.
Olidan: Just be your self and he’ll like you……….so what do you think about
detention now?
Eloy; im a bad bad girl who needs to be punish!
WARREN: Laughing and dancing during detention? Tracy Trunblad I will make your
detention for a whole month!
Eloy: A whole month? Ahhhhhhhh
(Corny Collin’s Show)
(Ladies Choice)
Charwena: Come on get out there and show ‘em!
Eloy: The crowd is pretty tight.
Charwena: Ok I’ll go in front of you and I’ll push.
Eloy: Wait..
(madaop kan boy 1)
Eloy: Hey seaweed, wanna do Peyton Place for corny?
Olidan; Are you crazy you gotta dance with your crowd and I gotta dance with mine?
Eloy; why?
Olidan: it just the way it is tracy.
Eloy: but it’s you dance.
Olidan: How about you borrow it for a second?
Eloy Really?
Olidan: Go get it girl!
(jEloy for the dance)
Reymart: come here little girl! you’ve got some move darling! What’s your name?
Joje: Umhh Im Tracy Turnblad
Reymart: Well Tracy Turnblad, how would you like to be part of the nicest kids in
town?
Joje: Its only my dream of a life time!
Charwena: Come hurry Mrs. Turnblad! Come see what’s on TV!
Joje: what is it?
(Corny Collins Show)
Reymart: That was our dance for the week performed beautifully by our council
member led by our newest council member Ms. Tracy Turnblad. So tell us about
yourself trace.
Eloy; Well, I watch The Corny Collins Show and I do absolutely nothing else!
Joje: To think that i almost stop her from reaching the stars. And now here she is in
local daytime TV!
Charwena: Shes gonna be a regular!
Joje: Imagine. My little girl, regular at last!
Eloy: I also hope to be the first woman president or a Rockette.
Reymart: And if you were president tracy, what would your first official act be?
Eloy; uhmmm.. Id make everyday Negro Day!
Reymart: I read you like tomorrow’s headline, tracy. What do you think kids? You
think we might have a hot new candidate for Miss Teenage Hairspray?
Eloy: That’s only the dream of my life!
Dina: But Miss Hairspray is mine!
Dulf: Ahh were on air….
Reymart: and your dream will be comin’ to you sweetheart, Saturday, june 2 nd right
her in WYZT.
Dina: You have to vote for a person Corny, not one of the Himalayas.
Reymart: Always the charmer amber.

Scene 3
Joje: (phone ringing) Hello? Oh yes this is her mother speaking… oh yes I know
tracy will appreciate your vote for miss teenage hairspray. Oh she loves you too.
very much. Wherever you are. Goodbye! Whoww that was crazy!
(New Girl in Town)
Warren: Velma come look at this! ……..Im telling you that big little girl is sending my
sales to the roof. More people are breathing aerosol than oxygen!
Blessie: This can’t be happening!
(Padayon New girl in Town)
Christine: That the way you do it! and im your fabled Miss Motormouth Maybelle your
DJ du jour, Pitchin rhythm your way! So hey! Better stay and shimmy and sway will
be right back for more negro day!
Blessie: And were off! How dare you pick the same song!
Christine: they wrote it?
Blessie: will I hope you enjoyed it ‘cause this is your last show! Im cancelling Negro
Day.
Olidan: What’s that about?
Christine: A foot in the door that all it is. One toe at a time.

Scene 4:
(Detention Room)
Charwena: Hi im penny im friend of tracy.
Eloy: Oh good penny you’re here!
Barredo: Where is her slip?
Eloy: Oh she does’t need one, she’s with me. Hey seaweed this is my friend penny,
penny this is seaweed.
olidan: Hi. (wink)
Charwena: (mahihimatay)
Olidan: Listen my mom’s havin’ a party tonight. Y’all wanna come check it out?
Joje: Now??
Charwena: would you mind if I too checked it out?
Olidan: Of course. Come on let’s go!
(Half song of Big Blond and Beautiful)
Christine: Well, looks like y’all took a step outta bounds. Now who we got here?
Olidan: Mom I want you to meet my friends, this is Link and this is tracy turnblad.
Eloy: this is so afro-tastic!
Olidan: and this young lady right her is penny pingleton.
Charwena: I’m very pleased and scared to be here.
Christine: Oh now honey. We got more reason to be scared on your street.
Eloy: Ms. Maybelle this party is a blast! But what are you celebrating?
Christine: Well, it kind of an ending. But it deserve to go out with a bang!
Charwena: what ended?
Christine: Negro Day.
(music stop)
All: what?!!
Christine: Alright, it’s time y’all knew. Velma von Tussle just told me we have had our
last show.
All: NO!!
Christine; Yeah, it seem that out little show was a nice little place holder but it was
time to get some rating. I didn’t want to bump y’all out, I just wanna have a little fun
tonight.
Joyce: but I’ve practice so hard. Now I’ll never get a chance to be on the show.
Christine: oh you will be seen baby. I promise
Eloy: You can’t have your onw show? Fine you’ll come dance with us.
Christine: ohh honey, you been dozin’ off durin’ history?
Eloy: Yes! Always!
Olidna: Trace, black and white ain’t never danced on TV together.
Eloy: Well if we can’t dance…. Maybe we should just march
Christine: oohh, that’d get some big ol’ ratin’s
Barredo: Better time slot too.
Christine: hmmm mmm, like on the 11:00 news.
All: Yes!!
Christine: You’re gonna pay a heavy price.
Eloy: I know.
Christine: You’ll never dance on TV again.
Eloy: If I can’t dance with seaweed and Little Inez, then I don’t wanna dance on TV
at all. I just want tomorrow to be better.
(I know were I’ve been)
All: 2,4,6,8 TV’s got to integrate (6 times)
Christine: excuse me officer is there some reason why we cant pass by peacefully?
Warren: I strongly suggest you and your little friends head back to where you come
from.
Eloy: Hey you don’t have to be so rude!
Christine: it okay tracy I can hadle this.
Eloy: Excuse me she’s talking to you!
Warren: you just assaulted an officer miss.
Eloy: Assulted?
All: ( Mag aaringasa)
Warren: Hey!
(magkakahuyo)
Warren: alright boys lets take the whole lot in.
(everyone exit dadlagan)

Scene 5
Joje: (newspaper) The infamous Tracy Turnblad assaulted an officer causing a
shattered jaw?? No this is a lie I know my baby can’t do that. I know im baby is good.
(phone ring)
Joje: hello?
Eloy: Mom?
Joje: Tracy are you okay?
Eloy: Yes im safe.
Joje: oh my god. The whole police is looking for you! where are you?
Eloy: Mom, listen I need you help.
Joje: what?
Eloy: Tommorow is the Miss Teenage Hairspray pageant. I need you to come down
to the station dress nice, penny will meet you out front.
Joje: What are you taking abo- (end call)
(Corny Show)
(Its Hairspary)
Producer: And we’re out!
Dina:Link you sprayed it right in front of my space! What did I tell you about that?
Blessie: Here is another one.
Producer: and we’re back in 5,4,3,(silently) 2,1.
Reymart: we are so close to announcing the new Miss Teenage Hairspray. Look at
that board, what a nail-biter this one is turning into. Ladies and Gentlement, the final
tally. It is my obligation to announced that Amber von Tussle…
Eloy: is about to get out danced.
Reymart: Tracy Turnblad!
Dina: What???!
( You Can’t Stop The Beat)

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