Lesson 8: Emotional Intelligence

Lesson Objectives:
At the end of the lesson, students should be able to:
1. Define emotional intelligence and explain its importance.
2. Describe the key skills to increase emotional intelligence
People who are successful does not depend only on their Intelligence Quotient (IQ). They are smart
and academically good but some of these people are not successful in their work because they lack the soft
skills. Some of these people are not the most fulfilled ones because they fail in personal relationships. IQ is
not enough to become happy and successful in life, rather it is a tool to help one to be academically inclined.
However, the emotional quotient (EQ) may help a person to face difficulties in all the exams and problems
that one may encounter in his entire life. Both IQ and EQ have to work together in a person to make him
motivated.
Emotional Intelligence and Its Importance
“Emotional Intelligence” according to Mayer and Salovey (1990) denotes to a person’s capacity to
perceive, process and control emotional information accurately and effectively both to himself and to others
and to utilize this information in guiding one’s level of thinking and behavior to influence others (The
Importance of Emotional Intelligence, 2020)
Emotional Intelligence known as Emotional Quotient (EQ) is the ability of an individual to use,
understand and manage his own emotions positively to lessen stress, communicate and understand other
people, face challenges and resolve conflict. This may help a person to develop strong relationships, to do
better in school and in the workplace and to achieve his personal and career goals. This also can make you
connected with how you feel, may turn your intentions to actions and to make decisions in life which will
matter and will make his life a fulfilled one (Improving Emotional Intelligence (EQ) - HelpGuide.org, 2020)
Importance of Emotional Intelligence
Emotional Intelligence tandems with Intelligence Quotient to achieve a successful life both in work
life and personal life. Emotional Intelligence affects:
1. Performance at School or Workplace
- Individuals who have high emotional intelligence can help manage complexities in the place of
work, can motivate others and may shine in their career. Most of the companies now before hiring
are determining the rate of emotional intelligence of an applicant to gauge his/her ability to manage
stress and difficulties in times of adversities. Employers are now rating EQ as important as important
as the applicant’s technical ability and they usually use EQ testing before they hire employees.
2. Physical Health
- If a person is not able to control and manage his emotions, his stress is not properly managed also.
This inability to manage stress may lead to health problems like increase blood pressure, increase the
risk of heart attack and stroke, defeats immune system, speeds the aging process and others.
3. Mental Health
- When emotions and stress level are not controlled, these may affect the mental health of a person
which may lead to depression and feeling of anxiety. People who cannot control their emotions and
stress level may find difficulty in building strong relationships. This will lead a person to feel sad,
isolated and worsen mental health problems
4. Relationships
- Understanding one’s own emotions and ability to control it will allow a person to express himself
better and understand the feelings of others. If a person knows how to control his emotions, we will
be good in communicating effectively with other people with respect which may lead to stronger
relationships in both personal life and work life.
5. Social Intelligence
- This is the ability of an individual to build relationships successfully and to direct other elements of
his social environment. Being able to manage a person’s emotions may improve his/her connections
 with other people in school, in the workplace and in other communities. Social intelligence is the
ability of a person to get along well with other people and encourage cooperation. A person needs to
be aware of every situation and he should have knowledge of the strategies to be used that may help
a person achieve his objectives in dealing with others. In other words, it needs self-insight and
assessment of his own perceptions (Improving Emotional Intelligence (EQ) - HelpGuide.org, 2020).
Key Skills to Increase Emotional Intelligence
The skills making up emotional intelligence can be developed and learned. It is relevant to know the
differences on just knowing about Emotional Intelligence and its importance and how to apply it in one’s
life. To attain emotional intelligence, one has to know himself well and stay calm to overcome stress. In this
way, an individual can make sound decisions even under pressure.
1. Self-Management
- This is the ability of a person to manage his impulsive feelings and behavior calmly. A person who is
able to manage himself has the ability to meet commitments and to adapt to changes in his
environment.
- Emotions are chunks of information that affects ones’ feelings. The feelings that a person feels about
himself and others are needed so he will be able to face stress since he will be taken out of his
comfort zone. When this happens, a person has the tendency to lose control on how he feels. If one
person knows how to manage stress and keep emotionally calm, those negative information which he
may receive will not make him upset and lose self-control. A calm disposition will make a person
choose the best alternatives for some problems, can control impulsive decisions and behavior, can
take more responsibilities and follow commitments and a person can be able to adapt to different
changing conditions in the environment.
2. Self-awareness
- A person is aware of his emotions how it affects his attitudes and behavior. He knows also his
strengths, weaknesses and his self-confidence. Emotional self- awareness will help a person in
knowing the factors which motivates him and what will bring him satisfaction and fulfillment in life.
- A person’s ability to manage his feelings like sadness, anger, fear and happiness depends on the
consistency and quality of his emotional experiences in his childhood. The present emotional
experiences of a person is a reflection of his early life experiences. The connection of the emotions
from early life experiences of a person with his changing emotional experiences at present is crucial
in the way he understands that his emotions affect this thoughts and behavior.
- In relation to self awareness, it is important to note that mindfulness is considered a mental state of a
person which can be achieved by focusing attention on the present moment and calmly accepting
other’s feelings and thoughts.
3. Social awareness
- The person has the ability to empathize with others. He understands the needs, feelings and concerns
of other people. He knows also how others feel in different circumstances. To be socially aware,
person has to maintain good human relation skill and recognize the importance of joining groups and
organizations.
- Social awareness allows a person to distinguish and interpret non-verbal cues which other people use
in the communication process. These cues are information which may inform a person about how
others feel and how their emotions are changing from time to time. When people sends nonverbal
cues, the other person will be able to understand his emotions and he can be sympathetic and relax.
- Mindfulness is a partner of emotional and social awareness. To improve social awareness, a person
has to identify the importance of mindfulness in the process to be able to know some emotional shifts
happening in other people to help them to be understood.
4. Relationship management
- The process of developing and maintaining good relationships with people as they communicate
clearly and effectively. Individuals usually influence and know how to inspire others. He also works
well with other people in the team since he believes in unity and teamwork. Also, a person knows
how to manage conflict so he can make the people work with enthusiasm and motivated.
- Working with people needs emotional awareness to be able to understand what other people feel and
experience. Once there is emotional awareness, emotional and social skills can be more developed
which will make the relationships fruitful and fulfilling.
- Non-verbal communications are important in sending messages to other person and can improve the
relationships. Humor and laughter are also used to lessen stress since it can calm down a person. To
add, conflict and some disagreements are normal in any relationships however, learning how to
resolve conflict in constructive ways can strengthen the relationships among people.
5. Motivation
- This is the ability of a person to motivate himself which focuses on achieving internal gratification.
A person feels that he/she should be a motivated person first so he can be committed and he can
focus on his goals in order to motivate other people as well. (Improving Emotional Intelligence (EQ)
- HelpGuide.org, 2020).
- Internal motivation is the person’s ability to motivate himself which focuses on achieving his internal
goals. People who are able to motivate themselves usually are more committed and goal-focused
which may lead to higher emotional intelligence (Improving Emotional Intelligence (EQ) -
HelpGuide.org, 2020).